Never Again
Silver Melodies sat with the pencil hovering in her green aura of magic. In front of her, a blank paper. She just sat there, reflecting on the days past, on what brought her to this decision. She couldn't live like this anymore. She couldn't handle any more hurt. She didn't want to go on.
The days of her past were long and torturous. She lived in constant fear of upsetting her friends and family that she never took time to just enjoy herself. She had been a great singer, but no one ever listened to her sing, or they told her to shut up when she did, so she stopped. She used to be funny, but no one appreciated her jokes or humor, so she stopped. She used to be kind, but every kind act was met with hostility, so she stopped giving her love.
Now, she was a shell. She was alone, with no one to turn too. She had been betrayed by those she loved most, those she thought she could trust. Her own family, beating her down until she couldn't move.
She touched the pencil to the paper. She had to do this, or she might die from the stress. She didn't even know what would happen after she went through with this, but she would cross that bridge later. The pencil left elegant streaks of lead on the paper, forming words, which formed sentences as she poured her feelings out into the paper before her.
Dear family and friends,
I know you probably won't take the time to read this, but I just want you to know what I’ve done. I can't live here anymore. I'm always cut down and left alone, with nopony to talk to, or with anypony to care. How do I live life without somepony who I can know truly cares for me? One that won't try to beat me while I'm down?
So I've decided to leave. I know you all don't care, but this is better for me. I just need to be away... forever. I can't come back. I mean, why would you leave a bad place, just to come back? That's silly.
In case you are reading this, and actually have the heart to read this through, please let me explain my feelings.
Abandonment, rejection, fear, pain, loneliness, humiliation, sorrow, depression. Those are just a few, but the main ones. I haven't had a single friend my whole life. No one to just hang out with, or to play with, or talk with, or even just sit in silence. No one. Not even my own family. My own father, treats me like trash. My own mother, like I'm not even there, or she can't concentrate long enough to just talk to me, she's always doing something. My brother treats me like he wants to kill me. My sisters like they don't want to ever see me again. Everypony I've ever known doesn't ever want to just hang out with me. I'm alone in this world.
So now my heart lies shattered, in pieces. I can't mend it. I tried once, but you all just smashed it again, then again, then again. I had my heart locked away for so long. I kept it under watch, never once letting it out. Then I thought I could trust a select few of you. I gave you my heart, I tried to open up. What did you all do? You threw it on the ground! You crushed it! Rolled over it like it was worth shit!
Silver Melodies took a moment to breathe. Her anger was welling up inside her. Once her breathing stabilized, she continued.
I'm tired of being used. You all act like my life is worth nothing more than a rock. If you want something from me, you'll use me. If you want me to do something you don't want to, you'll use me. You'll use the fact that I just want you to all be happy as an excuse to make me do you work, or give you my stuff. You have no regard for my own life, or my own needs, only your own. I can't help the fact that I want to make you all happy, I just want you to see I need to be happy to. But no one cares.
When problems arise, I'm left on my own. Everypony will team up to take me down, no matter if I’m right or wrong. Nopony wants to know my side, they just want to show me what a terrible pony I am. Who knows? Maybe I am terrible.
By now most of you have stopped reading this. Okay, if you are still reading this, I just want to say... I’m sorry. I don't know what I did wrong. I tried my best, but my best was never good enough. I just wish I knew why you guys didn't like me. I wish I knew what I could differently.
Just know, if I could, I would do this all over again in hopes of finding out what I did wrong, but now it's too late. I can't continue, so I'm going to leave. So... I'm sorry. You'll never see me again, so I guess you'll be happy. I'm sorry...
Silver Melodies felt a tear roll down her cheek and stain the paper as she scrawled down the last few words amidst trying to hold back sobs.
Your loving sister, daughter, and friend,
Silver Melodies
She folded the paper up and placed it on her shelf. Chances were it would go unnoticed, but she didn't care anymore. She just had to get out of here. She opened the front door and stepped outside. She gave one last look towards the house. Nopony was home, so they wouldn't see her leave. She looked lovingly at the house, the decor, the toys... she would never see them again.
With a sigh, she closed the door and stepped out onto the street. She was never seen again.
Nopony mourned.