The Life of Two "Average" Ponies

by Ferote

First published

This was inspired by Three of Me Vs School Society. Notice I say INSPIRED.
the updates for this will be nonexistent

Chapter 1

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“Wake up Ferote, wake up man. WAKE UP.”
“I’m up! I’m up.”
“How can you sleep like that man?”
“I dunno.”
“You slept through the cops being called on our neighbors.”
“I’m not surprised, what did they do?”
“Don’t know, don’t care, and neither do you.”
“Morning Dark, morning Light.”
“Light says morning, Dark is still sleeping.”
“What the fuck, you let him sleep but not me?”
“He’s part of me. Of course I will.”
“Sorry about this Phoenix.” I reach for an object resting on my back
“About wha- OW, MY EARS WHAT THE FUCK MAN. WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET AN AIRHORN?”
“I have my ways.”
“Dark is going to kill you.”
“No he isn’t, I’ve done worse. And even if he wanted, he wouldn’t be able to. If I can give Inferno a run for his money, I can take Dark. Besides, Ponyville High doesn’t approve of murder. Otherwise there would be a few more, well needed, graves in the cemetery.”


Phoenix and I are roommates at a house about a mile away from Ponyville High. We’ve known each other for Celestia knows how long. I know about Dark and Light, and he knows about Aliron and Reive. I shouldn’t have to say this, but, WERE BOTH STRAIGHT, I have no idea how often I have to tell this to ponies, we are just two stallions that both have voices in their heads, his voices are his personalities and mine are all powerful beings. Why is it that when two stallions live in the same house they are automatically considered gay? Lyra and Bon-bon live together, and nopony calls them lesbian, so why do ponies call me and Phoenix gay?


“Dude hurry up and get ready. We both know your grades can’t handle you being late. Why are your grades so low anyway? Your so damn smart.”
“Smart, but lazy as hell.”
“These humans can’t be helping.”
“Leave the fact that I’m a Broman out of this.”
“How can you be like that? How does another species, one that doesn’t even exist, get you off like that?”
“I said to not go into my room during my “me time”. We have those rules for a reason.”
“It wasn’t what you were doing. It’s what you were doing it to. Dark and Light agree with me.” I lift my right fore hoof
“I hold in my hoof all the fucks I can give.”
“Whatever. OH SHIT were going to be late!”
“Nope” Then I change into the Spirit of the Everfree.
“That still weirds me out.”
“What, the fact that I’m the spirit of a god damn forest?”
“Just the transformation. Now why did you do that?”
“I’ve been experimenting with something. Come here.” I trot over to a tree in the nearby forest “Stand by that tree over there” I motion to a tree about twenty yards away.
“All right, but this better not take too long.”
“Oh it won’t. All right, turn to your right and stand still.”
“All right.”
*SMACK*
“WHO THE FUCK DID THAT?” He turns around and sees, my hoof waving to him, sticking out of a tree “THE HELL?” I then walk into the tree I was standing by, and out of the tree Phoenix was next to.
“Sup.” The look on his face was hilarious (Wish I had a camera. Mental image will have to do.) “ All right now let’s try the next bit.”
“Wait a minute, let’s? As in we?”
“Yes.”
“There is no way in HELL I’m walking into a tree.”
“I got third degree burns when you wanted to try that thing with the fireball, you can risk a little concussion. You do want to get to school on time, don’t you? Because I can leave your ass right here. You know I’ll do it.”
“Fine.”
“All right” I put my wing on his back
“No homo right?”
“Shut the fuck up and gallop into the damn tree.”
“I swear if your fucking with me.”
“GALLOP INTO THE MOTHER FUCKING TREE”
“Okay okay.” We gallop into the tree and poof we’re at Ponyville High “DUDE, that’s fucking awesome, are you all right man?”
“Tired as hell” I then change back to normal
“That still creeps me out.”
“Let’s just go to class. What was our first class again?”
“Damn you are tired, chemistry is first.”
“Awesome, I kick ass in chemistry, I can sleep.”
“Lucky bastard.”
“Yes?”
“Go to hell.”
“I Already am.”


:Chemistry classroom:
“Okay class, you’re taking a test over the symbols and valences today. Like usual, you cheat you fail.” (wow I forgot how much Mr. Belland reminds me of my dad, oh god I miss him, mom too. I would trade the SOTE anytime for just one more day with them. No time for reminiscing, got to get to work) I finish the test with ease, turn it in then sit back in my chair and doze off

***************[Begin backstory]***************

“Come on Ferote, It’s time to go home.”
“But mom, I want to camp some more.”
“Sorry son, I love this forest just as much as you do, but houses don’t fix themselves. Rainbow Dash probably put a few more holes in some walls that I have to fix.”
“And the substitute can’t teach forever, but I promise that we’ll go camping as soon as we can.”
“Do you Everfree Promise?”
“As long as the sun shines, my promise stands. As long as the river flows, my oath is true. As long as the Everfree is wild, I keep my word. This I swear.”
“Thank you mom.” I embrace her in a hug
*Grrrrrr*
“Did you hear that Monaza?”
“I did. I thought Timberwolves stayed in the heart of the Everfree.”
“Guess not. Ferote, I want you and your mother to get away as fast as you can, now go!” After a moment of hesitation I gallop away with my mother. “Come on! I can take all of you. Bring it!” (He’s drawing attention to himself to save us.) I glance back and see a Timberwolf leaping onto my father.
“DADDY!”
“Come on Ferote, we have to get away from here. AH!” I turn my head and see a wolf landing on my mother, a claw piercing a lung.
“MOMMY!”
“Run Ferote, run away.”
“No I’m not leaving you. (What do I do. What CAN I do. Oh Celestia help me, THAT’S IT) Oh goddess of the Sun, hear my prayers. Protect me and my family.” Everything becomes still, even the Timberwolf that was lunging at me “Thank you Celestia.”
”I am not the Sun goddess, I am the Spirit of the Forest.”
“Can you save my parents?”
”Sadly I cannot, I can however allow you to speak with them one last time.” A fog rolls in, slowly enveloping the forest until I can only see myself. I slowly turn and see two figures that are slightly blurred from the fog.
“Mom? Dad?”
“Yes it’s us Ferote.” They walk closer until I can see them clearly.
“Mom, you Everfree Promised that we would go camping again.”
“We will son.”
“But how dad? Both of you are, you’re, you’re…”
“Dead.” When they both say this, it finally gets through my head that they are gone, forever.
“But we will go camping all the time, because we will never leave your side. We will be with you everywhere. In the shade, in the sun, in the rain, and in the snow. As long as there is nature, we will be there for you.”
“Thank you mom. And dad?.”
“I’m gonna miss you kiddo.”
“I love you.”
“We love you too.”
“Make us proud son.”

***************[End backstory]***************

*RIIIIING*
“Huh, what?”
“You fell asleep man. It looked like you were having a bad dream.”
“You could say that.”
“What was it about?”
“My parents.”
“Are you ever going to tell me about it?”
“…”
“You don’t have to if it’s uncomfor-”
“You deserve to know.”
[A/N This is based on Three of Me Vs School Society, but I will be focusing more on things that happen outside of school. How do you guys feel about punctuation in thoughts I.e. parenthesis. I think they’re only needed to show a pause in the thought process or a question, but I can fix that if enough people think it’s important. Also, could one of you artistically gifted readers draw me some cover art? As you can see the only fic with a picture is Ponyture Science, and that’s courtesy of GeneralZoi. I also need names for Ferote’s parents, I want them to be related to their jobs, yet not generic.]
-Michael

Chapter 2

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“Make us proud son.”
“I will dad, I will.” The fog returns from wherever it came, taking my parents with it. I look at all of the trees around me and smile at the thought of my parents being with me forever.
"I may not be able to return your parents to you, but I will tell you know something.”
“What’s that?”
"You are not completely pony.”
“What am I?”
"You are literally part forest. You are the descendant of two powerful beings. From your mother’s side is a being of nature, the Spirit of the Forest, which would be me. On your father’s side, a being of power, the Spirit of the Earth. Our power flows in your blood, and I will awaken your true potential” As he finishes, I feel a change in my body. I become taller than Celestia herself, my mane changes from red and blue to white and black, my tail changes colors to match my mane, but also changes from short and sharp to long and flowing, and my fur changes from red to white with black stripes. "Strange, you were the spitting image of your father with your mother’s eyes, but now you have a mixture of your mother’s pure white and my midnight black, and you have your father’s eyes as well.”
“W-what have you done to me?”
"I have only awoken your true form. However you will not stay this way , for this form expends a large amount of energy. As you mature and grow stronger you will be able to sustain this form for longer periods of time. To return to your normal form think of only your parents, to turn into the Spirit of the Everfree think of pure untouched nature.”


(Thanks for showing him my memories Reive.)
"It is much more reliable than word of mouth.”
“Dude, I had no idea how fucked up your life was”
“Well now you do, but if you tell anypony about this, ANYPONY, I swear that I will make your life a living hell.”
“I won’t tell a soul, As long as the sun shines, my promise stands. As long as the river flows, my oath is true. As long as the Everfree is wild, I keep my word. This I swear.”
“You know that, as the Spirit of the Everfree, I have to personally kill anypony that breaks an Everfree Promise?”
“Now you tell me.”
“And Dark, since you are a part of Phoenix, you promised too, I didn’t say anything to Light because I know he won’t tell anypony. But don’t worry guys, if somepony REALLY needs to know then I’ll tell them. I get final judgement on who needs to know.”
“Can you hear him?”
“Nope, I can just tell what he’s thinking, it gets like that when you know somepony really well.”
“I know you better than anypony, so why can’t I tell what you’re thinking?”
“Do you know every inch of the Everfree Forest like the back of your hoof?”
“Nopony does.”
“I do, and until you do as well, you’ll never know me like I do. Because for all intents and purposes, I AM the Everfree.”
“You know every inch of the Everfree like the back of your hoof?”
“Eeyup”
“Why does everypony copy Big Mac?”
“I don’t, it’s just the way I talk, and to answer you question, I have no idea. Let’s go” At the other end of the hallway a brown pony with a spiky mane of the same color, I couldn’t make out his Cutie Mark from this distance, overheard me and struck a heroic pose and yelled something. I couldn’t hear what it was exactly, but I had a good guess.
“We don’t speak French Doc.” When he heard me yell this he walked away with a smile on his face.
“Finally, somepony gets my joke.” he muttered to himself
“Who was that?”
“Don’t worry about it. Let’s just get to class.”


:Seven hours later, just outside school:
“You gonna teleport us again?”
“Phoenix, pretty much the only time I will teleport more than just myself again is when lives are in danger. It is exhausting.” A idea pops into my head (Oh how I love being smart.) “Hey Phoenix, wanna race?
“What are the rules?”
“No contact, no teleporting, and no time altering.”
“Sounds fair.”
“Dark is thinking of ways to cheat isn’t he.”
“Eeyup.”
“Now that’s copying Big Mac.” We turn towards our house.
“Three” we both say
“Two” I say while Phoenix goes Inferno
“One” He says while I go SOTE
“GO!” We both exclaim, my voice rivaling the Royal Canterlot with ease. Phoenix leaps into the air, flames trailing from his wings and hooves. (Celestia he’s fast, too bad I’ve already won.)
“I WIN PHOENIX.” He goes from just under mach 1 to a standstill in ten seconds flat.
“HOW THE HELL DID YOU WIN?”
“COME HERE AND I’LL TELL YOU.” I didn’t want to continue a conversation from this distance. I’m not sure how well the foundations of the school would take it
“How the FUCK did you win?” Phoenix was right next to me, his regular self now, within seconds.
“The race was to home, and I’m home as long as I am surrounded by nature. That’s why I picked the house at the outskirts of town.”
“Damn loopholes.”
“Just be happy we didn’t bet anything on it. I only did that for a laugh. I’m not in the mood anyway” I jump into the air, flying at a calm pace with my eyes shut “I want to relax. Adrenaline rushes, while fun as hell, are not relaxing.”
“So what are we gonna do?” Phoenix pulls up next to me.
“I’ll be meditating in my room, you can go do whatever.”
“I just might join you.”
“Just be sure to shut the hell up.”


:Phoenix and Ferote’s house:
“Dude, I know you love nature and all, but this house is WAY out in nowhere.”
“It helps that my father built this house with his own hooves. Apart from the memories and nature, this is all that I have from him. I would rather die than sell this house. That’s why I meditate, I feel close to my father. Okay, first find a position that is comfortable enough that you can sustain it for hours on end, yet not so much that you will fall asleep. Try mine to start.” I sit on the couch like a human with my fore hooves pressed together, my hind legs rested on the floor. After I do this Phoenix follows suit on the chair on the other side of the room.
“Is there a reason we’re sitting like Lyra?”
“Not really, I only sit like this when I meditate. Now close your eyes and let your mind wander. If you need to piss or something, don’t say anything, just go do what you need to do.” I close my eyes and practice what I preach. As my mind wanders I think of my parents, nature, school, pretty much everything at once. I hear a gasp from Phoenix (I’ll let it slide). My heart slows along with my breathing as I become at peace with myself, and in a way, the very earth the Goddesses rule.
[A/N I need some help. The house that Phoenix and Ferote live in needs a name, just PM me ideas and if one of you comes up with something good enough I’ll use it in the story and give you a little shoutout.]
-Michael

Chapter 3

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[A/N I got tired of doing the whole bold and underline thing for Ferote and Reive, so now I’m going with symbols]
ß Ferote.ß
µ Reive.µ

A week after Phoenix tried meditation he wanted to go camping, in the Everfree. We were standing at the edge of the Everfree. “Come on man, I know you have bad memories with this place but we can still go camping.” I check the duffel bag on my back (All good) then I look at Phoenix and see the five on his.
“Are you sure you want to bring all of that stuff?”
“Dude I need all of this stuff.” I shake my head at his apparent need for material items (Oh yeah, that’s the whole reason I took him on this trip, don’t want anypony else to be like her.)

:Ten minutes later:
*Pant pant*
“What did I tell you.”
“Shut up man. Dark, Light, little help?” (ß I swear if either of you do anything I will inject so much Poison Joke in your blood Phoenix will go brain dead.ß) “Guys? OH FUCK YOU MAN! You know what? Fuck this shit. I’m stopping right here.” He collapsed from exhaustion, something in one of his duffel bags broke. He didn’t check, so he was either too exhausted to care, or he learned his lesson. (Hang on, Is that a campsite? Looks like it hasn’t been touched in about…ten years.)
*Grrrr*
(Deja vú…OH SHIT. Don’t fail me now Everfree!) “PHOENIX, INFERNO NOW!”
“I can’t I’m too tired.”
“WOULD YOU RATHER BE RIPPED TO PIECES, DIGESTED, AND THEN BE SHAT OUT OF A TIMBERWOLVES ASS?” His fur turns midnight black and blood red. “DIDN’T FUCKING THINK SO.” As usual everything slows down, except for Phoenix and my reaction time, but something is wrong. The time rift isn’t as powerful as it usually is. (He can’t support it, he’s too tired.) The Timberwolves leap out of the bushes.
---------
“Ferote, I want you and your mother to get away as fast as you can, now go!”
---------
“Come on man I need some help here.”
---------
I glance back and see a Timberwolf leaping onto my father.
“DADDY!”
---------
“Dude snap out of it!”
---------
I turn my head and see a wolf landing on my mother, a claw piercing a lung.
“MOMMY!”
---------
“DUDE, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?”
---------
“Run Ferote, run away.”
---------
“SHIT!” This snaps me out of my flashback and I turn to see Phoenix pinned by a Timberwolf.
“I’M COMING MAN!” (Dear god my voice sounds retarded when it’s slowed down.) I run towards him, flapping my wings for a boost in speed, but it wasn’t enough, Phoenix isn’t affected by his time rift, and since the Timberwolf was touching him, it wasn’t either. The Timberwolf rears back its head and strikes, ripping out Phoenix’s jugular. “NO!” I flip upside down, then bicycle kick the Timberwolf’s chin. Its head flew off of its body, spine still attached to the skull. Its body fell to the side of Phoenix. I rush over to Phoenix’s body “Shit, shit, shit” (ß Reive, is there anything you can do?ß)
“µ If I merge his mind with yours then I can rebuild his body. I would warn you of the risks, but you don’t care.µ”
(ß You know me so fucking well.ß)
“µ I will have to make you unconscious, otherwise your mind will reject and kill Phoenix. Are you ready?µ”
(ß Do it.ß)
[READ THIS: It pains me to say this, but this story will basically be on permanent hiatus, it will still be updated, but they will be very sporadic, and most likely this will go months on end without updates. I would leave this as incomplete, but I will rarely update it. I am SO sorry, but I can only write when I’m inspired, and I’m just not feeling where this story can go. Any future chapters will most likely be random points in time, and story progression will be rare, I can’t express how sorry I am, but if I were to force myself to write this, it would be crap.]
-Michael