Of Gods and Ponies

by FoggyHunter

First published

What would happen if you gave a mortal man the power of a god? Would it be used for good, or abused?

Meet Joseph Conrad, a regular teenager who has suddenly been thrust into a world of friendship, bright colors, ponies, and mythical beasts. In time he will discover a power only held by humans in this world, a power that will make him godlike. But can he handle the responsibility of this new power? Will he be able to keep his humanity and morals in the face of growing pressure, or will the power go straight to his head? Whether he knows it or not, Joseph will hold the fate of an entire world in his hands, and that fate will become anything he so chooses.

Authors Note: So yeah, this is my second story and I was inspired by a few others to try out a different style. Hopefully it will turn out OK, but be sure to let me know what I can improve on.

I should warn you now that the main OC will be slightly Marie Sue-ish, but this is the type of story that people read to see the main character actually get shit done.

I do not own My Little Pony. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro and I make no profit from the making of this fic.

Also, there are going to be references, lots of references.

Rebirth by Sleep

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Authors Note: LOL obvious reference in title is obvious.

A light breeze...

It feels nice...

I scoot my self deeper into the covers of my bed and-

Wait, breeze?

I bolt right up into a sitting position and take a look around, and find that I’m not in my room anymore.

“What the hell?”

I am sitting in my usual bed which, for whatever reason, is now sitting in the middle of a large clearing smack dab in the middle of a forest. The sun is high in the sky right above me, signaling that it’s noon. Of course, what time it is is not what’s going through my mind right now. What is going through my mind can be summed up as thus:

OMGWTFBBQWHERETHEHELLAMI!!!

Crap, now I’m hyperventilating and can’t seem to stop holding my covers like an infant.

Ok, calm down now.

...I said calm down now...

For god’s sake, son, calm the hell down!

…BRAIN, Y U NO LISTEN.?!?!

Uh...wait... there we go.

I start to get some better control of my breathing now that the initial shock has passed, but that still doesn’t solve my more prominent predicament. After all, I’m still stuck in a GOD DAMN FOREST!

Easy, now. Don’t want to start hyperventilating again. Let’s try to think this over. I went through a perfectly normal school day, got bummed about the two B’s I have with the same teacher (not very suitable for an A student such as myself), rode my dual-sport home like always, watched the latest episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, read some MLP fan fics, did some chores, ate dinner with my parents, went to bed, then fell asleep. Then I woke up, and here I am.

Ok,... that helped me in no way whatsoever.

Wait a minute... Fan fics... why are fan fics on my mind now of all times? Can’t think about that now, gotta find out where the hell I am.

Just to make sure I’m still me, since the rest of this morni~ er, noon has been anything but logical, I look my self over.

… Yep, I still seem to be all here; roughly 5’7”, lightly muscled, skinny as hell, short-cut curly brown hair, and still male (thank god). If I’m still the same then I can only assume that my eyes are still blue, too.

Now here’s something I hadn’t noticed before. I don’t have my glasses on, yet I can see everything around me clearly. This is strange as usually I can’t hold my own hand two feet away from me without it looking blurry. But right now, I can see my surroundings perfectly in all its crystal clear, cartoonish splendor.

...Cartoonish?



“Oh shit.”

I seem to be in a cartoon. This could either be absolutely awesome, or completely shitty. Guess I’m gonna have to find out.

Seeing as I have been sitting in my bed gawking like an idiot for the past five minutes, I think I should get my lazy ass out of bed and start figuring out where in the blue blazes I’ve ended up in.

I am currently only in my boxer briefs, so I decided to use one of the sheets of my bed to make a makeshift toga. Seemed like a better idea than walking around a forest in nothing but my undies. As I step out of bed, I feel the cool grass underneath my feet, and I suddenly gain a sense of peace. It feels nice rubbing the grass between my toes and listening to the breeze as the warm sun shines from above.

Well, enough of that. Time to start trekking.

Since there really isn’t any path, I guess I’ll just head East. At least I think it’s East compared to where the sun is. Wait, but it’s noon. Ah whatever, I just pick a random direction and start walking.


So I’ve been walking for quite a few minutes now, at least 20 or so, and I have discovered some interesting things since I’ve been here.

For one, walking through a forest in bare feet is not as painful as I had thought. That’s a plus.

Second, it gets awfully quite wherever I go. I can here birds chirping in the distance, but whenever I get closer, they go silent. Maybe they think I’m a predator or something, I don’t know.

Third, I don’t know if it’s just my imagination, but the more I walk through this forest, the... better I feel. I can’t really explain it. It’s almost like just being in this forest is making me stronger, more vitalized. I’m sure it’s just my imagination though.

As I continue, my mood begins to sour. What if I can’t find my way back home? I have an entire future ahead of me. I’ve busted my ass off getting ready for college and now that might just all go down the shitter. Not to mention my family. I wonder how they’re taking it? Still, there’s got to be some way to get back home, right?

My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of rustling foliage. I quickly look towards the sound to see a bush moving slightly, and then become completely still. As I listen carefully I can hear what sounds to be... galloping? Yea, something is galloping away in the same direction as I am currently travelling. Must of been the thing that disturbed the bush. Since whatever was galloping away is going in the same direction I am, I might see what it was. Not that I care all that much, but it would be the first living thing I would see in this forest besides plants.

So without further delay, I continue on my way.


Meanwhile, completely oblivious to the otherworldly newcomer, the ponies of Ponyville continue on with their day as usual. Throughout the town pegasi, unicorns, and earth ponies go about their business; shopping, trotting to someplace important, or just enjoying the day.

One such unicorn is currently trotting with a smile on her face and a spring in her step. This unicorn is Twilight Sparkle and if you don’t know what she looks like, YOU ARE NOT A BRONY!!! The reason she is in such high spirits is because she just received a new assignment from her loving ruler and mentor, Princess Celestia, and has just finished gathering all the supplies needed for it. Walking behind her and carrying said supplies is Twilight’s baby dragon and number one assistant, Spike.

“So, tell me again why we need all this stuff?”

“Because, Spike, the Princess has discovered a new form of magic and wants us to study it.”

“New form? How many forms are there?”

“Nopony knows, and apparently neither does the Princess. That’s why were doing this, Spike.”

“Ok, but why do we have to have all this wierd stuff? Sulfur, powdered iron, worm tongue, dragon leaves, eye of newt; this stuff’s not light, you know.”

“Because,” Twilight began with a hint of irritation, “we are studying the magic of creating something from nothing, and in order to do that, we must first learn about the magic that creates something from something else. Remember how Discord was able to make just about anything appear?”

“Oh yeah, that exploding chocolate milk was pretty cool,” Spike says with a smile.

“Yes, well, as ‘cool’ as it was, Discord showed us capabilities of magic that we had never considered before.”

“And that’s a good thing?”

“In this case, yes.”

The duo remains silent for the rest of their walk until they arrive at Twilight’s home, which happens to be an entire library carved into the inside of a large tree.

As they steppe inside, Twilight tells Spike to set the supplies down next to her writing desk, which the baby fire breather more than happily complies. With nothing left for her assistant to do, Twilight tells Spike that he is free for the rest of the day. Spike uses his new found free time to do what he always loves to do: nap.

While Spike is going upstairs to his bed, Twilight decides that there’s no time like the present to get to work. So she starts her project like she does with any other project: with a book.


Several books, notes, and hours later, Twilight is confident that she is ready to put the theories of recreation magic to the test.

“Alright,” Twilight spoke aloud, “just need to focus. From one material to another, no problem.”

Twilight focuses magic through her horn, as she had countless times before, and concentrates on the pile of salt in front of her. Her goal is to form the salt into a different material. The material she has in mind is a similar mineral, sugar. The reason for this selection is because it is simple enough to tell the difference with just a lick. Within seconds the salt begins to take on the same purple glow as her horn and begins to reform itself, turning bright with the magic being channeled into it. The light being emitted from the salt pile soon became too much for Twilight’s eyes as she squeezes them shut. Then, with a little more push of effort, Twilight finishes her spell and the blinding light slowly fades away.

As Twilight opens her eyes, she sees a small sparkling white block laying on the floor. Now to see if she got it right. Twilight levitates the small block off of the floor, brings it to her mouth, and gives it a lick.

Salty.

Twilight huffs in disappointment. She didn’t change the material, just merely solidified it. She would have to review her notes in order to see if there was a flaw in the process.

SLAM!!

Before she can so much as pick up her notebook, Twilight is startled by the sound of her door slamming open. Twilight quickly looks towards the library entrance to see Zecora, the local zebra witchdoctor and a friend of Twilight’s, visibly sweating, panting from exhaustion, and clearly distressed.

“Zecora, what’s wrong?” Twilight asks, worry evident in her voice.

“(pant)(pant) Twilight,” Zecora begins in her African accent between gasps of air, “(pant) listen to my words and head what they mean. (pant) There is a beast within the Everfree (pant) of which I have never before seen.”

If it wasn’t for Zecora’s current state, Twilight would be intrigued by this news. Hell, in a way she still is.

“What kind of beast? Is it dangerous?”

“(pant) As I am now, (pant) my mind is too slow. (pant) Let me catch my breath, (pant) and I will tell you all that I know.”

Twilight nods in agreement and leads the tired zebra to a couch to rest upon. It takes only a couple of minutes before Zecora’s breathing returns to a normal pace, in which time Zecora gladly accepted a glass of water from Twilight.

“Ok, so can you tell me what happened?” Asks Twilight, now with a notepad and quill levitating near her.

“Of course Twilight Sparkle, and be sure to listen well. For this is quite a bit of news to tell.”


“ACHOO”

You know, I think there’s a Japanese wife’s tale that says you sneeze whenever somebody is talking about you. Probably not all that accurate though.

Sigh...

I’m sure I’ve been walking for hours now, and the scenery isn’t changing much. It was noon when I left my bed, and I can tell the sun has moved quite a bit through the forest canopy. I’m starting to get hungry, and my feet are starting to become sore. Man, what I wouldn’t give for my Walkman.

I crack my back out of habit and keep on walking. Needles to say I’ve had plenty of time to reflect on my situation, and it is anything but optimistic. In just the span of a night, or even a minute for all I know, my entire life may very well be gone. God that sucks.


ARGH!!

My feet are killing me now. I’m not built to walk for this long. At least I don’t think I am. Sigh...

My toga’s starting to slip. Gotta pull it back in place and...

Wait, was my arm always this thick.

I flex my bicep. Nope, it was never that big before. What the hell, am I not even in my own body now? I look over myself again and find that my muscle mass has at least tripled since I’ve been walking in this forest and I have this itching feeling that I’ve also gotten taller. If I remember correctly, the toga barely came down to my ankles when I left my bed. But now it only goes down to about my knees. Because I’m more muscled now (for whatever reason) my chest has gotten wider.

Holy shit, I went from scrawny 18-year-old to muscle bound jock 18-year-old in the span of a few hours just by walking in a forest. I should be freaking out at how impossible this is, but you know what, I’m just gonna roll with it.

I flex my arm again and I gotta say, I like what I see. Always wanted biceps this big, now my entire body is muscled up to boot. Huh, I guess things are looking up a bit.

THUMP

Oh crap, I think I spoke (thought?) too soon.

I turn towards the noise to see a demon of hell itself. It looks likes an over-sized lion with bat wings and a scorpion tail.

“Oh shit...” It’s a manticore, and it looks hungry. Well actually I wouldn’t be able to tell that now, but I’m not about to find out.

It paws at the ground in the manner that a bull would before charging.

Nope.avi

I turn right back around and start hauling ass.

From the sound of the manticore’s roar and the constant thumping, I can (un)safely assume that it’s giving chase.

I’m still clutching my bed-sheet-toga cause apparently even in a life and death situation, I still want to keep my modesty. God dam I got some weird priorities.

I take a glance behind me to see the manticore is still on my tail, and far too close for my comfort. Then with a beat of it’s wings, it leaps for the pounce.

Well since I have the body of a jock, I guess it’s time to do some jukes. I immediately bring myself to a stop on my right leg, and then use that leg to propel me under the manticore’s leap in a dive and then a roll. The manticore land’s right where I had been, and I find myself right behind it.

Now in hind sight, what I was about to do may have seem like a really bad idea but fuck it, whatever slows this thing down. I grabbed the beast by it’s tail, and brought my foot down on it right rear leg with all my might. The manticore roared in pain as the leg joint gave way under my foot with an audible snap.

The adrenaline pumping through me and the fact that I was able to hurt this monster gave me a huge confidence boost. I jumped on it’s back while still holding my grip on it’s scorpion tail just as the manticore whipped itself around to try and face me. Now I had a pretty good grip on this things tail, and I think it knew it, cause it suddenly got the bright idea to flick it’s tail as hard as it could.

“AAAAHH CRAP!” I yell as I sail through the air.

I hit the ground with a grunt and tumble a few more feet. When I look up I can see the manticore limping towards me, primal rage set in its eyes. Since I didn’t brake anything in that fall, I instantly leap to my feet and start running again. I may have slowed it down, but I’m not about to keep trying my luck against a ferocious mythical predator that’s as tall as me.

Wow, I can’t believe my toga is still on me after all that. Wait, why am I thinking about my toga, I gotta focus on running.

Then I hear the beating of leathery wings, and my blood chills. FUCK! I forgot that thing had wings!

In desperation to lose this thing, I start running and juking between trees, seeing if I can slow it down some by doing so. The sound of its wings aren’t getting any closer, but it isn’t getting any farther, either. Then the beating stops.

I yell out as I suddenly feel a searing pain in my back as I am knocked to the floor. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what hit me.

Just as I roll over onto my back, the manticore brings one of it’s colossal paws down on my chest, pinning me to the ground. I look up I swear the manticore is actually smiling, as if it new it’s victory was assured. Well fuck that noise.

In one last ditch effort to save my own skin, I bring my foot up as hard as I can, and hit that overgrown cat fucker right in the balls.

The manticore’s smile of victory is instantly replaced by a howl of pain as it looses its hold on me. I follow up by bring my legs out from under it, and giving it a hard double foot kick to the face. The blow sends it rearing, causing its already wounded hind leg to give out and bringing the beast down to earth hard.

I’m not about to give it a chance to recover. I’m pissed right now and I’m gonna make this bastard hurt. I get back on my feet as the manticore wallows in pain, and once again grab hold of it’s tail. Only this time I pull it so that it’s taut, and then bring my foot down on one of it’s carapace joints, snapping it into uselessness.

“This is what happens when you fuck with the WRONG HUMAN!”

I continue onto its back and do the same thing to both of its wings.

I jump off the manticore and turn to look at it, and it is apparent that this thing is beyond done. It is curled up into a ball and whimpering in pain. Damn this is sad. I almost feel sorry for the guy now.

Almost, but not quite.

Seeing as this poor bastard isn’t going to be causing me any more trouble any time soon, I continue on my way.

The adrenaline is receding, and now I can feel the pain from the wound on my back and the bruises that I had gained. It hurts and aches like a bitch, let me tell you. I don’t know how fucked up I am but all I can do is wrap my sheet around my torso tightly and hope that will be enough to bandage the wound. My hand’s are starting to shake form the aftershock of that whole ordeal. I was this close to death and I knew it. God damn that was scary.

And yet, despite the pain and the shock, I feel like a total badass right now. I just took on a mythical monster that’s my size and not only lived, but beat that sucker down into submission. If my body was still the same from when I was still in bed, there would have been no way I could have survived that ordeal. I guess it’s true what they say: bigger is better.


He is confused.

When he had sent the beast to test the boy, he had expected the boy to either subdue and befriend the beast through kindness, or die by the beasts claws while trying to run.

When the boy did run, he fully expected him to die. The last two he had brought here did, after all. But die he did not. Instead he fought.

The boy did not win through kindness, but through some form of cruelty.

This is what confuses him the most. That is not how it is supposed to be. In this world, cruelty is never supposed to gain victory. And yet, the boy continues on, a little worse for wear but alive.

He sighs in frustration. In a way, just surviving the test means that he passed, but the methods by which he passed are questionable.

There is no doubt in his mind, the boy is dangerous, and the power he is planning to bestow upon him will only make him more so. Should he still give the boy this power, or find another that will pass the test properly?

No... this boy has the spirit of a warrior, and in time that is exactly what this world will need.

Another sigh. His time is coming to a close, and he needs to find a successor. If the boy can still prove that he is capable of kindness, then he will have to do.


Twilight reviewes the notes she had written during Zecora’s story and is perplexed. A creature that stands on two legs, has hardly any fur, wears... curtains? It's almost preposterous to believe that such a creature exists. But then, this is the Everfree Forest they are talking about. What’s more, this creature seems to be on it’s way towards Ponyville, according to Zecora . There is still no telling whether the creature is dangerous or not, but its description is just so... alien, that a pony can not help but speculate.

Zecora had long since left to return to her hut, so Twilight is alone in her library, save for her sleeping assistant. Twilight could swear that baby dragon could sleep through hurricanes, tornadoes, and earthquakes... at the same time.

This new event will definitely require study. Maybe she can get Fluttershy to help since she’s so good with animals.

Twilight looks out the window to see that the sun is getting quite close to the horizon. A look at her wall mounted clock tells her that it is around 4 pm.

“Hm,” Twilight thinks aloud, “I should probably send a letter to the Princess asking if she knows what this creature is.”

Twilight brings out one of her blank scrolls and a quill from her writing desk and begins writing done all she learned of the creature for Zecora and asking if the Princess knew of what it was. When she finishes, Twilight decides she will wait until Spike wakes up before she has him send the letter. Zecora did say it wasn’t moving very fast and it still was quite a ways in the Everfree. At least that’s what she thinks she said. Twilight never did have the heart to tell Zecora that her rhyming made it difficult sometimes to understand her meaning.

Twilight suddenly realizes that with the excitement of this new event, she had lost time on her studies in creation and recreation magic.

‘Better get back to work,’ thinks Twilight as she goes back to her notes and books.


Man, I hope I find the edge of this forest soon. The sun is getting low and I definitely don’t want to be here when it’s dark. If predators like manticores hunt during the day, I can only imagine what other beasties might lurk about during the night.

Sigh, walking, walking, and more walking. I swear I’m not gonna be able to feel my feet after this.

Wait, is that...

Yes, it is! The light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.
Seeing light up ahead brings up my hopes as I pick up the pace. As I run closer, the light gradually gets bigger. Yes! I’m almost out of this god damn forest!

I continue to run until I finally break through the treeline and into open grassland. I view my surroundings and see rolling hills of green, soft white clouds, and a lone mountain off in the distance. Then I see the town not to far from where I am and I go rigid with shock.

I know that town. I’ve seen it enough times on my computer to know what town it is. I look at the mountain again and see that there is a regal and intricate castle implanted in its side. I look to the clouds again and see that a cluster of them far off in the distance actually have rainbow waterfalls pouring down from them.

I fall to my knees as I continue to gape at what I am witnessing. I think something in my brain just broke.

“heh... heh heh heh heh Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”

I just can’t stop myself from laughing like a maniac. It all makes sense now. The forest, the cartoonish surroundings, hell even the manticore. It’s so cliche it’s disgusting

“I’m in Equestria.”

I Come in Pain.

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Holy shit. I’m in Equestria. This is some messed up shit right here. Ok, who the hell put me in a coma? Cause that’s gotta be what’s going on here. How can this even be happening? It makes no sense. (Sudden flash back to episode one of season two) Oh god, I hope this isn’t one of those things were Discord summons a human just to fuck with him. That would piss me off to no end.

As hard as it is for me to believe this, I can’t help but concede to the facts. I am in a HIE fan fic. Fan-fucking-tastic.

What should I do? Should I try to initiate contact? What will they think? I’ve read enough fan fics to know that they can be tolerant and loving, but what if that’s not how it is here? Oh god... I hope Celestia isn’t a xenophobic bigot like she is in so many other HIE fics, cause I am so fucked if she is.

While I’m going through my internal raving, I suddenly notice a very familiar cottage not very far from where I am. Fluttershy’s cottage, as if the hundreds of animals loitering around it wasn’t obvious enough.

Hmmmmmmmm... If anyone, I mean anypony, could handle my appearance the best, it would be Fluttershy.

As I get back to my feet, I suddenly feel a little light headed. I’m not quite sure why until I feel something drip down my back. Oh yea, I’m still wounded, and it’s still bleeding. The blood must have soaked through the sheet. Crap, I better get a move on.

I make my way towards the cottage, and as I do the animals begin to grow wary. They’re not running for the hills screaming, per say, but they are giving me a wide berth. As I cross the little bridge that lays over a small creek in front of the cottage, I can tell that my condition is getting worse. It is taking more effort just to put one foot in front of the other.

Finally, I’ve reached the door. As I knock on the door, a sudden thought comes to me. Fluttershy is my best bet to get fixed up, and if she’s not home I’m a dead man.

After a few grueling seconds of waiting, I here a soft voice from within.

“Who is it?”

Yes! She’s home. Even through the door I could recognize that voice anywhere. Wait, what should I say?

“Uh... hi. I’m not really from around here and, um, I could use some help, if that’s ok?”

Sure I sound a little like her, but at least I don’t sound threatening. Ah, crap. My visions starting to tunnel.

The door opens with a click.

“Of course, how can I-”

She stops when she opens the door fully and gazes at me with wide eyes. God damn she’s adorable. Believe it or not, she’s actually half my size. Ugh, not feeling too hot here.

“Yea..” I simply say, right as my legs give out.

I come down to the floor flat on my face. I hardly even have the strength to keep my head from hitting the floor. My vision is getting worse and I’m starting to feel awfully cold. That is never a good sign.

“Omygosh omygosh omygosh. Um, just hold on. I’ll, uh, get you better in no time, I hope.”

“That sounds just fine to me,” I weakly say just as unconsciousness takes me.


Fluttershy is about to have a heart attack. The strangest creature she had ever seen comes to her home asking for help, and then collapses right in front of her. With the creature on the ground, Fluttershy had a clear view of the very bloody cloth that the creature had wrapped around itself. This only proved to scare her even more. This creature, a total stranger, is hurt and putting its life in her hoofs.

A sudden sense of determination washes over Fluttershy. By the power invested in her she will not let this living being die. She drags the creature deeper into her cottage (a difficult task considering how large it is) and then gets to work undoing the old bandage. After many long seconds of struggling, Fluttershy finally manages to rip the sheet off, and what she founs underneath horrified her. Three long and bloody gashes run across the creatures back.

Fluttershy manages to hold down the contents of her stomach as she begins to understand the seriousness of the wound. Her experience with tending to hurt animals tells her that this calls for stitches, lots of stitches. She quickly flies to her kitchen and grabs the medical supplies she keeps there. As she flies back, she realizes that she may not be enough to save this creature. After putting the supplies down, she hurriedly grabs a piece of paper and quill and begins to write frantically. After she finishes she calls out to one of her most trusted companions.

“Angel Bunny! Come quick!”

A small, white rabbit answers her call and dashes to her before standing to attention like a soldier. He is fully aware of the situation’s dire nature, and is prepared to help his owner.

“I need you to take this letter to Twilight as fast as you can, ok?”

Angel salutes before snatching the letter and running out the door as fast as his legs could go.

“Oh, I hope he can get to her in time,” Fluttershy says to herself as she begins to tend to the wounded creature.


Twilight sighs in frustration. All the books she could find on recreation magic, which were few to begin with, only had far fetched theories and concepts. Nothing told her how to actually preform the magic and with the failure of her second and most recent attempt, she is beginning to wish that at least one of the books could. Maybe the Canterlot Library has better books on this subject. Spike’s still asleep, though, so she can’t send a letter to the Princess just yet. Heck, she still needs to send the letter she wrote about the creature Zecora spotted.

She sighs again. ‘Honestly, that dragon spends more time asleep than awake,’ Twilight thinks.

Before Twilight can continue with her project, a new distraction presents itself. From the library door comes a soft yet rapid thumping. Twilight’s curiosity perks up and she opens the door with magic. As soon as she does, a white blur races towards her only to stop suddenly in front of her. Twilight instantly recognizes Fluttershy’s pet rabbit, Angel.

“Angel, what are you doing here?” She asks.

Angel merely responds by thrusting a folded piece of paper towards her.

“Oh, what’s this?” Twilight asks as she lifts the paper from the rabbit’s tiny paws and unfolds it.

Dear Twilight,

EMERGENCY!

NEED YOUR HELP, PLEASE HURRY.

Fluttershy.

Twilight’s eyes widen as she reads those four lines. Obviously, something big has happened, and if Fluttershy needs her help, than she is more than willing to oblige.

“Thanks, Angel. I’ll be there in no time at all.”

The statement is not far from the truth, because at that moment Twilight shut her eyes in concentration before disappearing with a zap, leaving a scorch mark on the ground.

Angel knew his job is done, so he hurries out of the library and back towards his mistress’s home.

Meanwhile, just as Twilight had disappeared from the library, she instantly reappears in front of Fluttershy’s cottage in the same fashion as she had disappeared. Twilight has always been convinced that teleportation is a very useful spell, and this situation only stands to encourage her belief in its usefulness.

After gaining her bearings after her spell, Twilight gallops through the cottage door.

“Fluttershy, what’s wrong? What do you nee-”

Twilight stops, both body and sentence, as she gazes with wide and unbelieving eyes upon the bloody giant that is layng face down upon the cottage floor with a very flustered Fluttershy hovering over it, a bloody needle and thread held in her hoofs which are also covered in blood.

“Twilight!” Fluttershy exclaims (in her own quiet way) with a hint of relief, “Thank Celestia your here. Please help me. I’m trying to stop the bleeding but the cuts are just so large that it just keeps coming out before I can stop it.”

This gets Twilight out of her shocked stupor and gets her thinking again.

“Ok, let me see.”

Twilight trots over to the creature in order to get a good look at it, and rears her head back in revulsion of the condition of the creature’s back. Fluttershy had managed to stitch one of the cuts close, but there were still two left, both bleeding profusely. One look at the creature tells her that it does not have long, and Fluttershy knows this as well.

“Can you help the poor dear? Please say you can help him, er, or is it a her? I really don’t know. Oh please say you can help!” Fluttershy is as close to a panic attack as Twilight had ever seen her.

“Fluttershy, listen. I need you to calm down. I’ll do what I can.”

Fluttershy weakly nods before giving Twilight some room.

Twilight takes a deep breath and begins to access her internal archives of everything she had ever read. The life of a living being is in her hooves, and she’s going to need a heck of a healing spell. Then Twilight remembers a spell from a medical book she once read. As she concentrates magic into the spell, she prays to Celestia and Luna that she will get this right, and in time.

Twilight’s horn glows it’s natural shade of lavender as she brings it down towards the downed creature. With but a light touch, the glowing aura instantly transfers from Twilight’s horn to the creature, surrounding it in the glow but concentrating mostly on the wounds.

Both Fluttershy and Twilight stare in wonder as the magic glow slowly closes the wounds, ultimately stopping the blood flow. In only a matter of seconds, the wounds are completely seamed shut, leaving only three long, pale scars.

For a moment, there is only silence. Then Fluttershy speaks up.

“Will...will he, or she, or... will it be ok?”

Twilight looks up at Fluttershy with tired eyes. That spell had taken more out of her than she had anticipated.

“I don’t know. We may have been too late...”

Fluttershy looks down, but then brings her head back up with an idea shining in her eyes. She begins to push the creature over, but finds much difficulty in the task. Twilight sees what her pegasus friend is trying to do and so helps her out by using her magic to levitate the creature onto its back.

Fluttershy wastes no time in looking over the creature, trying to find any sign that it still lived. Then, in a surprising display of ingenuity, Fluttershy brings her ear down to the creatures chest. A smile breaks across her face as she sighs in relief.

“He’s alive.”

Twilight gives Fluttershy a confused look before saying, “How do you know it’s a he?”

At this Fluttershy becomes flustered all over again as a slight blush reveals itself across her face.

“Oh, well... I don’t, really... it’s just... well... it... it just feels right to call it a he. If... that makes any sense.”

Twilight doesn't fully buy it, but nobody has animal expertise like Fluttershy, not even the local veterinarian.

“Ok, whatever you say.”

Twilight then brings her attention back to the creature still passed out on the floor. There is something about it...

Then it hits her. Of course! This has to be the creature that Zecora saw not too long ago. A thin smile crosses her lips. This will make an excellent subject to study on. As far as she can tell, no other pony has encountered a creature like this, and she will be the first to catalog it. Twilight’s thoughts are interrupted, however, by Fluttershy.

“Oh no. I know that look in your eyes. I’m sorry Twilight, but you will have to wait until he wakes up and is feeling better before you do anything with him.”

Twilight is surprised by Fluttershy’s sudden forwardness. She gets over it quickly, however, and begins to defend her motives.

“I’m not going to do anything that will hurt it~ er, him. I’m just going to study him for a bit. You know, write down his appearance, habits, psychology, physiology, natural abili-”

“I’m sorry Twilight, but he has obviously been through a lot and needs his rest. You can ask him if he will allow you to study him and only then when he is fully rested and healthy.”

“Ask him, what do you mean ask him?”

Fluttershy instantly becomes her timid self again. “Oh, well... when he first came here... he kind of... talked.”

Twilight’s eyes widen at this information. “He talks!? Just like us? That’s a sign of advanced intelligence. Do you know what this means?”

“Yes,” Fluttershy responds, once again in her firm-yet-motherly attitude, “it means that you need to let him get his rest. I’ll let you know when he’s feeling better, I promise.”

Twilight is about to argue further, but knows that Fluttershy will have none of it. When it comes to animals under her care, the yellow coated and pink maned pegasus does not mess around.

“Alright, you win Fluttershy. But I’m going to hold you to that promise.”

“Of course,” Fluttershy says cheerfully, “have a good afternoon.”

“I will,” Twilight replies before leaving. ‘And oh what a restless afternoon it will be,’ she later thinks as she begins to trot home.

Fluttershy sighs in relief. She really didn’t mean to be so strict with Twilight, but the creature had been through so much; she felt it was the right thing to do.

Fluttershy looks back towards the creature, sleeping peacefully. For some reason, she actually finds him to be quite cute. Kind of like a hairless monkey. She slowly brings herself down next to the sleeping creature, never taking her eyes off of him. There is something to admire about the creature. The way his muscle-toned chest rises and falls in a steady rhythm is almost mesmerizing to the shy pegasus. Even during this time of vulnerability, strength is evident in the creature’s muscled form.

Unaware of the slight blush showing on her cheeks, Fluttershy leans closer until her head is resting on the side of his chest, with the rest of her body leaning on the rest of his torso. She can hear the steady beat of his heart, and the sound of his steady breathing. All this combined with the warmth of his body and the exhaustion that came from the excitement not more than two minutes ago slowly lulls her to sleep.


….

Hey, my consciousness came back. I guess this means I’m not dead. Wait, am I back in my own world? I open my eyes and see an unfamiliar, cartoonish ceiling. Nope, doesn’t look like it.

You know, for a guy who just passed out from blood loss, I feel pretty good. It’s almost like I had never taken that hit to the back in the first place. I’m about to get up when I become aware of a weight on my chest that I had not noticed until now. I look down and my eyes widen at the sight before me.

Fluttershy is laying right next to me with her head on my chest, her face turned towards mine, and sleeping soundly. A bit of her long pink mane is covering half of her right eyes which is closed in soft slumber. She even has a small smile on her face.

Oh. My. GOD! THIS IS THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!! I swear if I didn’t have the diabetus before this, I definitely do now. Even the soft snores she’s making are just FREAKING ADORABLE!

Yea, getting up can wait. I think I’ll just lay here for a while longer.

I suddenly have the urge to pet her. I hope she doesn’t mind.

With slight hesitance, I bring up my right hand and slowly bring it in contact with her mane. It is incredibly soft, like the best combination of silk and fluff you can think of. I begin to run my hand through her mane and over her scalp, and would you believe it? She actually let out a small “hmmm” and her smile got wider!

GAH!! CUTENESS LEVELS REACHING CRITICAL!!! MY HEART CAN BARELY HANDLE THIS AMOUNT OF DAWWWWW!!!!!

Funny business aside, this mare probably just save my life. I can see the blood on her hooves, most likely from trying to fix me up. I owe her big time, and I intend to pay up in full. How, though, I am not quite sure. Either way, it sure feels good to be alive right now.

You know, I should probably be feeling self conscious since I’m still half naked, but you know, I just can’t bring my self to care.

I can't tell whether it has been minutes or hours that I've spent on this hard wood floor, petting a sleeping Fluttershy on my chest. It has been by far the most peaceful feeling I have ever felt.

Then Fluttershy begins to stir. Crap, I guess it’s true when they say that all good things must come to an end. Still, I didn’t take my hand away from her mane. She looked like she was enjoying the sensation of me petting her more, until her smile instantly disappeared and her eyes shot wide open. With a gasp and then a squeak (again, cute as hell), she springs away from me, landing a good ten feet away with, by far, the thickest blush I had ever seen. Even when scared she is so cute.

I lean myself up until I’m in a sitting position. Now I feel self conscious. Even though I’m sitting down, her eyes barely come up to the same height as my own, even when she’s standing. Man, I’ve gotten tall.

….

Uh... awkward silence is awkward.

“Hi...” I speak first.

“H-hello...” Flutershy responds, nervously scuffing at the floor with her hoof and keeping her gaze cast down.

“Um... did... did you you heal me?” I ask next, reaching behind my back to try and feel the wounds that had been there before. You know, now that I think about it, that was a really selfish question. Damit, she’s probably scared as all hell right now and all I can think of is myself. Bad Joseph, bad.

Fluttershy is silent for a moment, but then says, “Well... I... tried. But I, um, had to get my friend to heal you with magic.”

Oh, so that’s why I don’t feel any pain or discomfort. Must have been Twilight’s doing. Wait a minute...

“Where is this friend?”

“She, uh, left. You know... back home...”

Ok, this isn’t getting anywhere. Time to try a different approach.

“What’s your name?” Of course I already know the answer, but right now I’m just trying to get her to relax.

“F-Flutershy...” She said the last part of her name in a whisper, which I knew she would. Not wanting to make her uncomfortable by asking again, I just act like I heard her.

“Fluttershy... That’s a beautiful name.”

The blush that had faded from her face a moment ago comes back with a vengeance.

“It’s... it’s nothing... special, really” She timidly says, trying to hide behind her lustrous mane.

….

Come on, say it. I don’t want to make this any more awkward that it already is.

“So, um, what’s... what’s your name?”

Yes! Second victory of the day! Well, third, if you count my victory over death.

“My names Joseph. Joseph Conrad.”

“That’s... um... a nice name...”

….

“Well, I’d like to thank you for saving my life. If there is any way that I can repay you, please let me know.”

Fluttershy lookes up with a surprised look on her face from my statement. Why, I have no idea.

“Oh, no. It wasn’t me that saved you. Twilight was the the one who used the healing spell.”

I think for a moment.

“Did you call her here?”

“I... I did...” Fluttershy responds, eyes once again downcast.

“Then I still owe you my life. Had you not called her, I’d probably be dead right now. Again thank you.”

“It’s... it’s nothing really...”

I look out a nearby window and see that it is now night. Must have been out for a few hours. I decide that I’ve been on the floor long enough and get myself back on my feet. As I rise, I see Fluttershy take a few tentative steps back. I arch my back in a stretch and receive a series of pops in return. I think this is only unsettling Fluttershy even more. I don’t want to scare her, but I can’t help how big I am compared to her.

“So... hectic day, huh?”

Fluttershy merely nods nervously.

“Yea.... Sorry about that.”

“It’s ok. I’m, uh, happy I could help.”

“Speaking of which, I still need to repay you for saving my life.”

Fluttershy looks up again with, yet another, surprised look on her face.

“Oh, you don’t have to do anything for me, really.”

“I may not have to, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Come on, is there anything I could do? Maybe some heavy lifting or something?”

“I... I don’t know...”

“....Well, if you think of anything, please let me know. Ok?”

“O-Ok”


Hmm..... Repaying kindness with kindess. He ponders if there is hope for this boy after all.

Although the boy has yet to carry out the tasks that he said he would, there is no denying the sincerity in his words. There is no doubt that he will keep his word when the opportunity presents itself.

Still... the boy is dangerous as he is. To give him more power may be unwise. However, he is running out of time. If he delays further, he and his power will fade away. The power has to go on; be given to another. There must be a successor, or the world will slowly fade away as well.

A mental sigh escaped his non existent lips. For so long he has kept his spirit from leaving this plane of existence through not but the power he wields and his own will. He is tired, so tired. All he wishes is to go to his final rest.

A gambit is needed. In a sense, a leap of faith. He is out of time. For so long his will has kept him going, but his will is near breaking point.

It is time. The moment the boys sleeps again, he will confront him, and finally be granted his much needed, and much deserved rest.


Fluttershy is at a lost of what to do. The creatu ~ no, Joseph, as that is his name, seems so... alien to her that she just doesn’t know how to act. Through their short conversation, though, he does seem nice. There goes another awkward silence. Fluttershy gathers her courage and decides to be a good hostess.

“W-would you, um, like anything to drink?”

Joseph smiles at this. “Sure, water would be fine.”

“O-Ok.” Fluttershy says before trotting to the kitchen. He has a nice smile. As she goes about getting a glass, Fluttershy can't help but wonder back to what happened when she was still laying next to him. He had used his... paw(?) to rub her mane. Fluttershy blushes at the memory. Despite the oddness of it to her, she had to admit that it did feel nice. There was something about his fingers when they ran through her mane and rubbed into her head. It was relaxing, and very comforting. She wouldn’t mind if he did it again...

She shakes her head clear of her thoughts, blushing brightly. Why is she thinking these things? It is so unlike her, isn’t it? In all honesty, she had never been in a situation like this, so she really doesn't know what to think.

She finishs filling the glass with fresh water from her ice box and holds it in both hoofs. She then realizes that her hoofs are still stained with blood. After cleaning her hooves off in the sink, she once again picks up the glass with both hooves and gently flies into the living room. Upon entering, she sees Joseph sitting on one of her couches (which is just barely supporting his weight) looking about her house with intelligent and critical eyes, as if he is taking in every detail of the room.

She flies over to him silently offering the glass, which he accepts. Fluttershy then flies over to a nearby chair and gently sets herself down.

Joseph takes a long draught from the glass while she watches, fascinated at how he uses his paw(?) to hold the glass.

“Um... Joseph?”

“Hmm?”

“If it isn’t too much trouble... could I, uh, ask a few questions? If you don’t want me to that’s ok, I’m just... curious...”

Joseph smiles again, “Sure, Fluttershy. Ask away.”

“Oh, um... ok. Well, not to sound rude, but, uh, what... what are you?”

“I’m what’s called a human from where I’m from, though you probably wouldn’t know what a human is,” Then he says under his breath, “At least I hope not...”

“Huh?” Fluttershy asks, not quite hearing that last part.

“Nothing,” Joseph says with a convincing grin.

“Ok... um, what... do you call those... things?” She asks pointing a hoof at one of Joseph’s hands.

Joseph holds up the indicated appendage. “We call them hands. Useful things these, as you can see.” Joseph raises his other hand that still holds the glass to emphasize his point.

Fluttershy nods in understanding. She had taken care of primates before, just none that could talk, or were hairless, or were this big.

“So... where did you come from?”

Joseph lets out a sigh at this, and Fluttershy becomes worried that she had asked something wrong. Before she can take back her question, Joseph answers.

“I came from somewhere far away. Very far away. And... I don’t know how to get back.”

Fluttershy becomes saddened from this.

“How... how far away?”

Joseph shrugs. “Probably either a galaxy or dimension away. I really have no idea.”

Fluttershy has a look of shock from this news.

“Wha- what?’”

“Yea... I went to bed in my own home, and when I woke up I was in that forest over there.” Joseph says, pointing his thumb towards the general direction of said forest. A downtrodden look sweeps over Joseph as he begins to remember the implications of his situation.

Those same implications are not lost on Fluttershy as she, too, begins to grasp the position Joseph is in. He is, in a sense, alone in an unfamiliar world. He has no idea how to get back home to his friends and family. No way to let them know that he is alright. Not only that, but he was injured while trying to traverse that dangers that is the Everfree Forest. Tears begin to form in her eyes.

Completely unprompted, and to Joseph’s complete surprise, Fluttershy flies over to him and throws her hooves around his neck, pulling him in as comforting an embrace as she can manage.

“You poor thing,” Fluttershy sobs, “It must be so scary for you.”

Joseph’s surprise only lasts a second longer before he returns the embrace, wrapping his arms completely around her body. She can feel the warmth in the embrace, and a feeling of security falls upon her. She doesn't understand why, but she feels so safe in the human’s arms.

“Heh, well... it isn’t that scary.”

Fluttershy lifts her head and gives him a look that says she knows that isn’t true.

“Ok, so it’s a little scary,” Joseph chuckles. Flutteshy giggles as well.

Though one could say the moment has passed, Fluttershy keeps herself in the embrace, enjoying the warmth. It is only with great reluctance that she eventually breaks the embrace and fly back to her chair, and only after giving his neck a gentle nuzzle.

“Um... I guess... this means you don’t, uh, have a place to stay?”

“Yea, pretty much.”

Flutterhy blushes again as she says, “Well, if you want... you could, uh... stay here.”

Joseph smiles, almost as if he had expected the request. “I would like that, thank you. Of course you know, with all your doing for me, I am going to have to do something for you. I know you said that I don’t have to, but it will definitely make me feel better if I do.”

“Um, ok.” Fluttershy responds, before another thought comes to mind. “By the way, if you don’t mind me asking, but how did you get hurt like that.”

Joseph’s eyes light up with pride as he says, “Oh, nothing much. Just had a run in with a manticore.”

Fluttersher eeps in surprise and disbelief.

“A m-m-m-m-manticore?”

“Yea, he got a lucky hit on me, but I got away.”

“How did you get away?”

Joseph looks hesitant at that before saying, “Uh, ran...”

Fluttershy doesn't completely buy it, but decides not to pry. After all, it must have been a dreadfully terrifying experience for him.

“Well, I’m glad you got away.”

It is at this moment that a certain small, white rabbit makes itself known by hopping onto the arm rest of the chair.

“Oh,” Fluttershy says, “hello Angel. Joseph, I’d like you to meet my most trusted companion, Angel Bunny. Angel Bunny this is Joseph Conrad.”

“Hey little guy,” Joseph says with a wave. Angel merely responds by giving the human a very suspicious look before returning his attention to Fluttershy. He opens his mouth and begins pointing towards it with his paw.

“Oh, are you hungry?”

The rabbit nods before indicating the other little critters that live in the house, all giving Joseph a wide berth.

“Oh... right, you all must be hungry. Sorry, I’ll get your food right away.”

Fluttershy get's her self back in the air before turning to Joseph.

“Sorry Joseph, I’ll be done in a bit.”

“No problem, take your time.” Joseph says. Then he says next, “Actually, is there any way I can help, I’m pretty good with animals.”

“Are... are you sure? You don’t have to, really.”

“I’m sure. Remember what I said before.”

“Oh... right. Well... in that case could you come with me, please.”

Joseph obliges by getting off the couch and following the pegasus into the kitchen. Fluttershy gives him some feed and instructs him which bowls to fill and with which feed. Joseph was always a fast learner, and so it took no time at all to get the chore done. Joseph even made a few new animal friends in the process. One adventurous ferret hesitantly made its way to the human. Joseph knelt down and held out one of his hands towards the critter. The ferret seemed confused by the action before hesitantly bringing its muzzle closer to sniff the hand.

Joseph reached the same hand out slowly to bring it over the ferret The ferret seemed to freeze in place as the hand lowered. Joseph gently brought his hand down on the ferret’s head and gave it a light scratch behind the ear. The reaction was almost immediate as the ferret leaned its head into his hand, what looked like a smile forming on its muzzle.

Fluttershy, as well as the other animals, witnessed this silently. Fluttershy wished she was the one getting scratched behind the ear.

Wait, what? Why was she thinking that? Fluttershy shakes her head to clear her thoughts again just to witness Joseph get seemingly tackled by a swarm of fuzzy critters. Joseph is on his back laughing as the animals crawl all over him, studying him and generally trying to understand this strange new animal within their home.

Fluttershy giggles at the sight before coming to the human’s aide.

“Ok, everybody. That’s enough now. Please give Joseph some room.”

Some animals comply, while others hardly seem to care. However, they have little choice either way as Joseph gets to his feet, the animals scattering the moment he does so.

“I’m so sorry about that,” Fluttershy says, even with a smile on her muzzle, “the animals can get so excitable at times.”

“That’s quite alright, no problems here.” Joseph replies while stretching, a yawn escaping his lips.

“Oh, are you feeling sleepy at all?”

“Yea, kinda. Weird, huh? I was asleep not too long ago.”

“Hmm,” Fluttershy says in thought, “ Maybe it’s a side affect from the spell. Hold on, I’ll get you set up with something to sleep on.”

Within the span of a single minute, Fluttershy has a blanket and extra pillows set up as a makeshift sleeping bag next to the fire place.

“There. It, uh, isn’t much. Sorry,” Fluttershy says.

“No problem,” Joseph replies before settling himself down on the blanket, which is too small for him. Fluttershy notices this and immediately gets him a second blanket.

The rest of the animals had already gone back to their little homes and holes that littered cottage walls and ceiling. Fluttershy herself is feeling a little sleepy.

“Well, goodnight, Joseph.”

“Goodnight Fluttershy, and thank you again.”

Fluttershy nods before trotting up the stares to her own room.

Joseph lays on the pillows and pulls the blankets over him. A content sigh passes his lips and before sleep takes him he thinks one thing.

It definitely feels good to be alive right now.

A Dish of Power, with a side of Surprise

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White. That is all I see. Just blank white all around me. Is this a dream? Is this limbo? I don’t even know. I can’t even feel my own body. I should be freaking out right now, but all I can feel is calm. I can’t explain it, but it feels like I should be here for some reason. I may feel that way, but I sure as hell don’t think so.

“Hello, young one,” I hear a voice say. It sounds like the voice of a really old guy, like a man in his 80’s or 90’s.

“Who’s there?” I reply.

“Someone who has been watching you since the moment you came to the land of Equestria.”

“What? Why?”

“Because, young one, I have brought you here for a purpose.”

“Wait, you brought me here? What the hell, man?! You ripped me from my home and family! Why the dick move!?”

“I did it for the survival of this world.”

“... Well you could have at least asked me first.”

“I had no way to contact you, only to summon you.”

“Well fuck, send me back then!”

“I can not.”

“Why the fuck not!?”

“Because should I send you back, then this world will die.”

“Bullshit! What does me being here have to do with keeping the world alive!?”

“Silence yourself and I will explain.”

“Ok, but it would be nice to actually see you instead of all this nothingness.”

“So be it.”

A wrinkled, old man wearing plain brown robes materializes in front of me. He is bald and has the whitest, longest Fu Man Chu moustache I have ever seen. He appears to be floating (or sitting on an invisible floor) with his legs crossed in a lotus position.

“My name,” the old man spoke with the same voice as before, “is Ragnarok. Or at least, that’s what it used to be.”

“Used to be?”

“A long story, one that I will try to shorten as much as possible.”

He takes a deep breath before continuing.

“Do you know of the Sister Princesses who rule Equestria?”

“Celestia and Luna? Yea, what about them?”

“They would have their subjects believe that the creation of Equestria came from the unification of three pony tribes.”

“Hearts Warming Eve, right?”

Well that surprised him.

“You know of it?”

“Yea. Where I’m from, Equestria and its inhabitants are part of a cartoon show that I like.”

“Cartoon?” He asked, puzzled. His eyes are closed now. I think he’s either trying to comprehend it or concentrating on... something. Wait, why is he smiling?

“I see,” He says next, “ So she has succeeded.”

“Who’s succeeded?”

“Nothing important right now, there is still much that I must tell you.”

Gah, whatever. I’ll keep quiet for now.

“The truth of Equestria’s creation is much different then what they would have the ponies believe. You see, long ago, long before Celestia or Luna came into existence, the world was completely ruled by us: humans, much like your world is now. And much like your world, the humans of long ago fought and bickered with one another. Nations formed and waged war on each other. The world was in a constant state of violence.”

“So what changed? We blew ourselves up, didn’t we?”

“In a sense, yes. It was the doing of a few revolutionaries. A small group of scientists and philosophers that made an extraordinary discovery. They discovered that humans do indeed have souls, and that there is power within the souls of humans. It is a power, an energy that humanity had never considered before. When the revolutionaries made their discovery, they chose to hide it from the rest of humanity. I do not remember when they decided to take action, but take action they did. Through the span of several years, they constructed a device that would harness this energy. They wished it to make the living of humans better. Using humanities own energy to power their appliances and vehicles. Unfortunately, the energy of a single human soul is minuscule, almost non existent. The revolutionaries did not realize this until too late. When they had finished the device, they had set it to collect enough energy to power the entire world. When the device was activated, humanity as we had known it ceased to exist.”

Wow. Ok, this is some pretty far fetched shit, man.

“Mankind would have become extinct that day. It should have become extinct. But something happened, something that even after centuries of living I still cannot understand. The energy of the souls of humanity converged on one of the revolutionaries, seemingly at random. and through that revolutionary, the energy transferred to the world as a whole. That lone revolutionary became the soul survivor of the entire event, and in time discovered that he held control over the power that had been harvested from his own species. Already the world around him was changing, being reformed by the energy that now flowed through it. Thousands of years of evolution happened in the blink of an eye. Land masses crumbled and reformed within minutes. The cities of man were swept away by the new global evolution. All evidence that humanity had existed was erased, save for the lone revolutionary.

And it was this lone revolutionary that crafted much of what Eqestria is now. He wished to use his new found powers to create a land of peace and prosperity, but knew that such a place would be impossible with humans. So he crafted a new species, with four different breeds.”

Ok, I think I’m starting to get it now.

“He created the four pony types and infused them with a small amount of his own blood. The reason for this is because only those with human blood can use the energy of the world, and that energy would guarantee the peace of the land, or so he hoped. Those that received the least concentration of his blood became the earth ponies, adept at tilling and working the land. Next came the pegasus ponies, who’s human blood would allow them to use the energy of the world to aid in their flight and interact with the winds themselves. Then he created the unicorns, ponies with the sole purpose to master the energy of the world in order to make life easier for all. Lastly, he created two beings with the traits of all three, and the greatest concentration of his blood. These two were tasked to watch over the others with wisdom and kindness, and to lead them should they ever go astray.”

“Don’t tell me. These two were Celestia and Luna, and your actually the revolutionary.”

He gives an amused hmph before saying, “You catch on quickly.”

“Didn’t take a genius to figure that one out.”

“No, I suppose not.”

“One last question before you continue with your shpeal. You said that the power of human souls combined with the world?”

“That is correct, and I believe I know what you are going to ask. Magic, as the ponies have come to call it, is in reality the combination of human souls.”

“Wow.... That’s an interesting... concept to grasp....”

“May I continue?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Very well then. That was over five thousands years ago. The sisters and I lived on thanks to our connection with the world, while the other ponies lived out their lives like all mortals do, their descendants continuing the species. There was peace in the land, and we were free of any threats. This continued for the next thousand years or so.”

“So what happened?” Ooh... doesn’t look like he likes that question very much.

“... Discord happened.”

Oh shit, no wonder he doesn’t like that question.

“It was an event I should have foreseen, and that I was more than capable of preventing. You see, the creation of Discord was no one’s fault but my own. It was at that time that Celestia and Luna finally began to mature. Think of it as their teen years.”

Dam, they must age really slowly.

“Though I had created them to be peaceful and caring, the intelligence and personalities of pony kind is still based upon that of human kind. As such, they are still susceptible to the throws of conflict, and there was much of this during that time. We were a family before then, but we turned into a dysfunctional family. Emotions ran wild, and I should have been more composed. But I was so used to being the ‘god’ of Equestria that I did not think to control my emotions.

Then, when the conflict and drama hit boiling point, it happened. My emotions tore away from me, and through my direct connection with magic they formed into a sentient being. This being would become known as Discord, the Spirit of Chaos. The tear had left me weakened, and Discord took advantage of my weakened state. He stole my body from me, warped it into his own image, and cast away my conscious into the streams of magic that run through the world. My spirit had rebelled against my soul. I, however, refused to give in and let my soul die. In my one and final attempt to right my mistake, I gathered what power I had, and used it to form a physical object that would act as a gate way to the streams of magic in its purest form. What I had intended to create was one key, but instead the six Elements of Harmony were formed. The rest, as you would say, is history.”

Wow, I have just learned of the very creation of Equestria itself. What Twilight wouldn’t do to be her right now. But still...

“Cool story, bro. But that still doesn’t explain why I’m needed to keep the world alive.”

“(Sigh) Ever to the point. The reason that you are needed is because without the proper conduit to focus the magic of the world, it will eventually fade and ultimately disappear. This world will not survive without magic, and if magic fades away, the very structure of the planet will deteriorate. A cataclysmic event that will leave the world devoid of life. I was originally this conduit, and I am still, if just barely. However, my will alone has kept me in existence throughout these centuries, and it is now beginning to wain. Every day a little more of me is lost within the streams of magic, and it will not be long before I am completely consumed. My power is at it’s limit, and all I want to do now is rest.”

“So I’m going to be this... conduit?”

“No, young one. You already are.”

Wait, “What?”

“Because you are human, you became the conduit the moment you arrived. Did you not feel the magic of the world empowering you, making you stronger?”

“Well I did get a bit of a muscle spurt while in that forest.”

“Precisely. The magic recognized your blood, your soul, and concentrated on you. It flowed through you and its power became your own. Now that you are here, I can finally go to my final rest.”

“Wait a minute, your not even going to give me a choice in this?”

“I can not afford to. My hold over the magic has wained, and attempting to send you back would be to sign the death warrant of this world. Please understand that I had to do this for the sake of all the souls that call this world home.”

I can understand. Doesn’t mean I like it any, though.

“So I’m stuck here for good.... Fuck. Are you going to at least tell me how to use magic?”

“No. I will leave that for you to discover yourself. Think of it as a good learning experience.”

God damn what a troll. Fucker’s got the smile going and everything.

“As a last request from a dieing old man, please use this power wisely. Beware of the conflict that can occur between your soul and your spirit. You must keep your mind and emotions focused, or you will lose your power over yourself. Eqeustria does not need another Discord.”

Amen to that.

“Good luck, Joseph Conrad. The world is now yours.”

He’s starting to fade away. I think now would be the appropriate time to say this.

“Rest in peace, you trollin’ old bastard.”

The last thing I see of him is that god dam troll face he’s making.


I open my eyes and see the fire place that I have been sleeping next to for who knows how long. There’s plenty of light, must be morning. I close my eyes again as I reminisce what I had just witnessed. I can remember the whole exchange in it’s entirety, so it couldn’t have been just a simple dream. This means that I have a lot of information to wrap my head around. For instance, HOLY SHIT MAGIC IS HUMAN SOULS! Twilight would flip her shit if she found out that whenever she uses a spell, she is really using the soul of a being long dead. I think I’ll lay it on her just to see her reaction.

Then there’s the entire beginning of Equestria itself. Celestia knows dam well how Equestria came to be, so why does she hide it? What could possibly be her motive? I’m sure I’ll find out eventually, but part of me doesn’t even want to. Then there’s the fact that I am the only thing standing between the entire world and certain destruction. That’s a heavy load to just plop down on a guy’s shoulders. What do I have to do? Is there some special ritual I have to do just to make sure the world goes round? No, wait, Celestia does that already. After all, making the earth spin on it’s axis is a lot more believable than making the sun itself move across billions of miles of void space in the time of a day. Planet may be magical, but I doubt the whole universe is.

I spend the next who knows how long just thinking over what I had just learned and its implications. I am never going to see my friends and family again. Years of preparing for college have just been wasted. My entire life as I have known it is gone. Yea, thanks a bunch Ragnarok, you fucking prick. Still, the idea of using magic is quite appealing. Fuck it, if I’m going to be stuck here for centuries, I might as well have some fun.

You know, now that I think about it, I really should have asked him: of all the creatures to turn sentient, why ponies? Why not something more human looking, like elves or something? Ok, admittedly a show about peaceful magical elves doesn’t sound as good as a show about peaceful magical ponies.

I open my eyes again and see a small ball of white. My vision focuses and I recognize Angel Bunny. Despite how cute this little guy is, he is giving me the most suspicious look that I think a cartoon rabbit is capable of. That’s another thing, if the world was regular before, why does it look like a cartoon now? Meh, probably magic.

Angel puts his paw in front of his eyes, and then points that same paw at me in a clear “I’m watching you,” message. He’s hopping away now, so I guess that’s all he wanted to do. I guess I should be intimidated, but the fact that he’s a rabbit just kills it for me. I get myself into a sitting position and stretch my back, which responds with several loud pops. I then crack my neck and knuckles, just out of habit. I may have a new body but sleeping on the floor still leaves a guy sore.

I just noticed, I’m damn hungry. I haven’t eaten anything since I i got here. I hope Fluttershy’s awake.


“Twilight. Hey Twilight!”

Twilight awakes with a start at the call of her name.

“(Yawn) What is it Spike?”

“How long are you going to lay in middle of the floor?”

Twilight looks around herself and realizes that she is indeed laying in the middle of the library floor. Surrounding her are open books and loose papers, including the book she had just been using as a pillow.

“Were you studying all night again?” Spike asks. “It’s almost 9 you know.”

“(Yawn) Is it really that late?”

“Check for yourself,” Spike replies while pointing to a wall mounted clock, which reads as 8:49.

“Alright, alright, I’m getting up.”

As Twilight is doing so, Spike reaches down and picks up one of the books out of curiosity. What he finds puzzles him.

“Hey Twilight, I thought you were studying creation magic.”

“I was.”

“Then why do you have Creatures of Myth out?”

Twilight freezes in place as the events from yesterday flash through her mind.

“Oh my gosh, that’s right,” Twilight frantically says while rushing to her writing desk.

“What’s right?” Spike asks.

Twilight is rewriting the letter she had prepared to Celestia yesterday as she says, “There’s a new creature at Fluttershy’s Cottage. I’ve been trying to find out what it is and have come up with nothing. None of these books hold anything that is remotely similar to it~ er him.”

“Him?”

“Fluttershy thinks it’s a male, but honestly I couldn’t tell.”

“So, uh, what does... he look like?”

Twilight ponders for a moment before saying, “He looks kinda like a really big, hairless monkey, except his ears and mouth aren’t as large.”

Spike thinks for a minute before saying, “Well that just gives me the weirdest image I can think of.”

“I know it’s not very accurate right now, but I bet you’ll get to see him later. Fluttershy promised that I could study him after he feels better.”

“Wait, what happened?”

Twilight shuddered as she remembered the wounds. She had never seen that much blood before, and it disturbed her.

“He was hurt, really badly. Fluttershy had me heal him with a spell, but I don’t know when he will actually feel better.”

Twilight finishes her letter before rolling it into a scroll and sealing it with wax.

“Here, Spike. Send this off.”

Spike complies without question as he takes the scroll. He holds it in front of him before taking a big inhale, and then exhaling green fire onto the scroll. The scroll burns up immediately before the ashes, mixed with magic sparkles, floats out the window and towards the capitol.

“Hey Twilight, is this new creature... dangerous?”

“I don’t know, he was unconscious when I healed him, and I didn’t get a chance to stay to see him wake up.”

Then a thought came to Twilight.

“But, what if he is dangerous? That means Fluttershy is with him alone. Oh no, I hope she’s ok...”

As Twilighte’s worry increases, Spike speaks up.

“I’m sure she’s fine. This is the Stare Master we’re talking about, right?”

Twilight thinks it over before conceding to the fact that their shy pegasus friend did stare down a fully grown dragon once.

“I suppose your right, I just hope she’ll b~”

ZZZZAAAAPPP

Twilight is interrupted by a blinding light and the sound of a teleportation spell being used. While Twilight is temporally blinded by the light, Spike was facing away from the spell, so his eyes were spared. He turns around towards the origin of the spell and gasps.

Standing in the center of a newly created scorch mark is Celestia herself, her face in an expression that Spike can’t recognize.

“P-Princess Cellestia!” Spike blurts out before bowing.

“What?” Twilight cries out confused, still blind from the flash of light. Before she can even think a second thought, Celestia speaks.

“Where is he?”

“W-what?”

“The creature, where is he?” Celestia asks again, anxiety clearly replacing her normal motherly tone.

“P-Princess, I, uh, why do you~”

“Twilight, it is imperative that I know where he is. Please, Twilight.”

Now Twilight is starting to have an internal freak out. Princess Celestia, co-ruler of Equestrai and goddess of the sun is practically begging for her help. What is going on? What can possibly make the Princess act this way?

“I’m-I’m sorry your highness, but I can’t see.”

Immediately Celestia’s horn glows and with just a touch of magic, Twilight regains her sight.

“Now, where is he?” Celestia’s anxiety only seems to increase as time passes.

Now able to see, Twilight responds, “H-He’s at Fluttershy’s cottage. Why, is something wrong? Is he dangerous?”

Celestia seemed to not have heard her question as she says, “I have to make sure. Lead the the way Twilight, and with haste.”

Though Twilight is still confused out of her wits, she complies and leads Celestia out of the library and towards Fluttershy’s cottage as fast as her legs can carry her.

Not two seconds after leaving the library, Twilight spots Pinkie Pie, along with Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash, speeding towards her.

“Hiya, Twilight,” Pinkie Pie cheerfully says as she bounces herself along side Twilight.

“Girls, what are you doing here?” Twilight asks while still galloping towards Fluttershy’s Cottage with Celestia flying above her.

“Oh, well I had another one of my twitchy twitchies and it was another doozy and I knew it had something to do with you and Princess Celestia so I got all our friends together except for Fluttershy cause I haven't got to her yet in fact we’re going to get her right now but anyway I was totally right. Oh, hiya your highness, what are you doing here?”

Celestia remains silent. It is at this point that Celestia’s anxiety is made clear to the other ponies. They can see the look on her face and they can not tell whether she’s excited or scared. All they know is that she is acting strangely, and this worries them greatly.

“Twilight, darling,” Rarity says in a whisper while galloping next to the said unicorn, “Would you by chance know what has gotten into our most benevolent ruler?”

“No, Rarity I don’t,” Twilight answers in a similar whisper, “and that’s what scares me the most. I think it has something to do with the new creature that Fluttershy is taking care of.”

“Creature, what kinda new creature?” Applejack asks next in her southern accent, also in a whisper.

“We don’t have time to go into detail. You’ll find out when we get there.”

“Well I’m flying ahead to find out myself.” Rainbow Dash says before taking off in a blur of rainbow and cyan.

“Dash, wait,” Twilight calls, but it is already too late. Rainbow Dash is way out of earshot. However, to everypony’s surprise, Celestia takes off after her without a word, matching the cyan pegasus’s speed within seconds.

“Wowy zowy, the Princess is really-eally fast!” Pinkie Pie exclaims in awe.

“Twi, what exactly ar’ we up agenst?” Applejack asks, clearly worried.

“I don’t know. I’ve never seen Princess Celestia like this before.”

“Well let us hurry then, before something awful happens.” Rarity suggests.

The others agree with a nod before continuing towards Fluttershy’s Cottage.


I’ve come to notice that the ceiling of this cottage is too low for me, and I need to lean down a bit in order to not hit my head. It’s starting to strain my back.

“Hey Fluttershy, I’m going outside to stretch a bit.”

“Ok,” she quetly responds from the kitchen. When I got up, I found out that Fluttershy was already awake and feeding the animals outside. When she came back inside, she immediately got started on a meal for me. I told her that I like nuts and fruit, so she decided to make something from those ingredients. It’s a good thing I was already vegan before I got here, cause I would have probably missed eating meat if I wasn’t.

I open the door and step outside. I have to bend really low to get out, almost on my hands and knees. It’s amazing that I didn’t hit my head on the door frame when I collapsed yesterday. I bring myself to my full height again and throw my hands above my head as I stretch my back. I’m still wearing nothing but my underwear, but I don’t think I mind that much. After all, these ponies don’t wear any clothing. I’m still going to need some clothes, though. Maybe Fluttershy can convince Rarity to make me some.

Now that I think about it, my entire time here has been extremely cliche. In the fan fics, Fluttershy has always been the first to meet humans in Equestria, and for good reason. She’s probably the only one that wouldn’t completely freak out at the sight of one of us. I’m personally glad I met Fluttershy first. It shows that the show is pretty accurate at portraying these ponies. Meeting Pinkie Pie is going to be scary though. She may be bubbly but she’s unpredictable, and that’s what scares me the most.

Then there’s Celestia herself. I am not looking forward to that meeting mainly because I have no idea how she’s going to react to me. Ragnarok said that he created them, but it was during their teen years that everything went to hell. Do they hold a grudge against him because he brought about the creation of Discord? Do they even know that he created Discord? And if they do, do they know that he didn’t mean to? I wonder if Luna will react the same way Celestia will?

My internal pondering is interrupted when I hear what sounds like a jet coming towards me. I look up and see a rainbow streak coming straight for me.

“Ah crap,” I say out loud. Chances are Rainbow Dash isn’t going to take kindly to me.

As expected, Rainbow Dash comes to a complete stop mid air when she gets close enough to see me clearly.

“Woah, what in the hay is that?” I hear her ask.

“Pfft. Nice to meet you too,” I say under my breath.

Wait, now there’s a new streak coming across the sky. Might be another pegasus, but I’ve never seen a pegasus that leaves a streak of light blue, turquoise, purple, and pink in the show.

….

Oh shit.

Celestia’s here? I’m fucked, aren’t I?

Celestia reaches the cottage and lands only about twenty feet away from me. She comes down hard, shaking the ground and leaving cracks in the paved path that leads straight to the cottage door, and straight to were I’m standing.

Yep, I’m fucked. If I’m going to die today, I’m going to stand my ground like a man.

Celestia had her head down when she landed, and now she brings it up and takes her first look at me. She gasps and just stares at me in shock.

….

Ok... I’m pretty sure she would have killed me by now if she was the xenophobic bigot that all the fan fics make her out to be.

“It’s... it’s true...”

Wow, this is starting to freak me out more than I thought it would.

She takes a step forward before saying, “You... you have returned.”

Wait, what? She’s smiling now, so that’s good. Wait, is she... crying?

“After so long, you have finally returned to us!” Celestia exclaims excitedly, despite the fact that tears are now freely flowing down her cheeks.

What the hell is goin~ OH GOD!!!

Celestia tackles me to the ground in a vice like hug. I just got glomped by the Goddess of the Sun. U jelly? Cause I’m not. It’s really hard to breath right now. I look up and see Rainbow Dash, and I swear, the face she has right now is priceless.

“I’ve missed you so much, Father.”

“Wait, what?” I wheeze out. Ah crap. She must think I’m Ragnarok. This is going to get really awkward.

I hear several gasps as I see the rest of the mane six come onto the scene.

“Uh, lady,” I try to say through the crushing hug, “I think you have the wrong guy.”

“What?” Celestia asks surprised, rearing back from the hug. I cough a bit as air returns to my lungs. I get myself back on my feet and find that I’m actually a little taller than Celestia, if you don’t count the horn.

I rub the back of my head as I say, “Uh, Princess Celestia, I assume.”

Wow, never thought I’d see her blush, but damn is her face red. Based off of humans indeed.

“Uh, yes. I am Princess Celestia. I, uh, apologize for my behavior. I’m... not quite sure what came over me.”

Ok.... I’ll be honest, I would have rather confronted Tyrant Celestia, or Trollestia, or even Molestia. At least then I would have been slightly prepared. But this. My mind is not prepared for this. Does she act like this often here? I look towards the other ponies and judging by their expressions I can safely assume that no, she does not. All of my preconceived notions of Celestia have been completely shot out the window, with a cannon.

Celestia regains her composure and clears her throat before saying, “Allow me to give you a proper welcome.”

And I’m pretty sure what she does next breaks my brain.

Celestia bows and says, “Welcome to Equestria, my lord.”

Story Time

View Online

Author's Note: Ok.... I'm a little worried about this chapter. I have this innate feeling that you guys are going to hate my characterization of Celestia. Hope you guys don't mind too much.
P.S. This is the first chapter I've ever written without a line break in it. Interesting, huh?

Error...
Error...
Error...
Can not Compute
Rebooting
Standby....

“Um, my lord?”

INTERFERENCE DETECTED!
REBOOT FAILED!

“My lord... are you feeling well?”

Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria and Goddess of the Sun is calling me “her lord”....

DOES NOT COMPUTE!
DOES NOT COMPUTE!
EMERGENCY REPAIRS UNDERWAY!

“Give me a sec, my mind needs to put itself back together.”

Hoo boy, the face she’s giving me would probably have made me laugh if my mind wasn’t so royally fucked right now.

I look out to were the Main Six, minus Fluttershy, have gathered just in front of the small bridge and I can safely say that they aren’t doing any better than me. In fact I think their taking it worse. I at least still have the brain capacity to speak, but the girls...

They all have the same expressions: rears on the floor, eyes as wide as dinner saucers (quite literally, considering how kuwai they are), and mouths hanging loose to the point of nearly touching the ground. Probably some cartoon physics at work for that last one. Hell, even Pinkie Pie is speechless. I wonder where Fluttershy is during this whole thing.

I turn my head back towards the door. Oh there she is, and what do you know; she has the same exact expression as everypony else.

Ok, I think my brain is back to full functioning power. I look back at Celestia and see that she has now just noticed the condition of her subjects.

“Twilight, are you all right?” Celestia asks, concerned for her prize pupil.

Twilight doesn’t respond, her face seemingly frozen in a look of absolute shock. Hell, I think I can here the sound of the disconnection tone from here.

“Ok, mah brain is working again, but I think theirs are still trying to wrap around what they just saw.”

“Oh,” Celestia says with a blush, “I see.”

Finally, and not surprisingly, Pinkie Pie breaks from her shock first.

“WHOA! What was that about!?” Pinkie directs her attention to me. “What are you? Why was the Princess hugging you? What are you doing here? What’s you name? Why are you so tall? Why do you stand on two hoofs? Are those even called hoofs? What do you call those?”

Yea, I’m just gonna start tuning her out now. The questions keep coming but I can’t hear them now. I think the others are starting to come back around, if only slowly.

“Soooo...,” I say next, not really sure how to proceed.

Celestia just stands there, blushing slightly.

Yeah, I knew this would get awkward. Pinkie Pie isn’t helping any, either.

“P-P-P-Princess Celestia?” Twilight finally speaks.

“Twilight,” Celestia responds quickly, “my favorite and most trusted pupil, how are you doing today?”

Wow, trying to act like you didn’t just brain fuck six of you subjects. Smooth, Celestia, real smooth.

“What... what was that about?” Twilight says next, undeterred.

Celestia sighs before saying, “I suppose that I have some explaining to do now.”

“Yep,” I simply say just before adding, “I guess I could help out, too.”

Celestia looks back at me and says, “You do not have to, my lord.”

Gah, there’s that whole “my lord” thing again. It’s just so weird hearing it come out of Celestia’s mouth. Or is it muzzle? Yea I think the correct term would be muzzle.

“I probably should anyway,” I respond, “I think I might know something that you will want to hear, anyways.”

Celestia’s eyes widen slightly at this and if she had eyebrows, I’m sure they would be raised, too.

“So,” I say while bringing my hands together with a clap, “What say we meet at the library were it’s more roomy?”

Wait is Pinkie Pie still...

“... Why are you so muscular? How did you get those scars on your back? What were you doing with Fluttershy last night? What do you eat? Do you like cupcakes? Do you like parties? How do you know about the library? What’s the average flight velocity of a fully grown manticore?”

Yep, she’s still machine gunning questions at me. Also, how the hell am I supposed to know that last one? Whatever, Pinkie Pie will be Pinkie Pie.

“A little help here?” I ask no one in particular. Thankfully, Celestia comes to my aid.

“Pinkie Pie.”

Pinkie immediately stops mid question and looks at the Princess.

“Yes your highness?” Pinkie Pie responds as bubbly as ever.

“I know you have many questions, as I’m sure you all do, but I think we should all return to the library were we can discuss this more comfortably.”

“Okie-dokie-loky then. Come on let’s go! I want to know more about mister creature here!”

I chuckle at this before seeing how the other girls are doing. It looks like Applejack and Rainbow Dash are recovering from the shock ok, but Rarity is now lying unconscious on the paved path. I look back towards Fluttershy but discover that she’s not at the door anymore. I look around for a moment before I find her sitting next to me, looking down bashfully. Before I can ask how she is doing, Celestia speaks up again.

“I think it would be best if we returned to the library as quickly as possible.”

Before anyone could respond, Celestia’s horn lit up with a golden light before said light flashed out and engulfed us all, forcing me to squeeze my eyes shut. Now there’s this weird feeling of motion, like I’m on a moving platform. As soon as it had happens, the motion sensation disappears. I open my eyes again, and I find myself in a different place. It takes me only a second to recognize the interior of Twilight’s library. At least here I have enough room to stand up straight.

I look around and see that Celestia and Twilight are hardly phased by the transfer while the other ponies are about as disoriented as me. Rarity is still unconscious.

This is pretty fricken awesome!

“Ok,” I say next, making it obvious that I’m impressed, “you have got to teach me how to do that.”

Celestia smiles and says, “Of course, my lord. Whenever you wish, I can teach you all that I know.”

Twilight looks a little shocked at this. I can’t really blame her, since she probably takes Celestia being her mentor very personally. Now to get down to business.

“Alright, before you unleash the flood of questions, I have one myself. Why do you keep calling me that?”

Celestia looks perplexed before saying, “What, ‘my lord’?”

“Yea, that.”

“It... seems appropriate, considering you are a creator.”

“Creator?”

“Yes... aren’t you?”

I think for a moment. This is probably what she considered Ragnarok to be and so assumes that since I’m of the same species, I’m one too. Considering what Ragnarok told me, I guess that’s not entirely inaccurate.

“I... guess I am.”

It may just be me, but I think Celestia looks relieved that I said that.

“What do you mean, ‘guess’?” Twilight asks suspiciously.

“Well I ‘guess’ you’ll find out, won’t you?” I reply. She returns my reply with a dirty look.

“By the way,” I say next, “Where’s Spike? Isn’t he supposed to be here?”

“He’s probably upstairs nap~” Then Twilight comes to a realization. “Wait, how do you know about Spike?”

“Again, that will be explained later.” Then I get a wicked idea. Time to do some trolling.

“Hey, Rainbow Dash, have you ever actually tried out for the Wonderbolts?”

“Huh? How do you~”

“And out of curiosity, Applejack, is your apple cider alcoholic?”

“Nah how in tarnations do yah kn~”

“Hey Twilight, do you think Spike will be mad at me for making his (add air quotes here) ‘girlfriend’ feint?”

Twilight is beyond dumbfounded right now; Celestia only a little less so.

“Hey Pinkie Pie, broke any fourth walls lately?”

“Oh, a few here and there.”

“Hah, I knew it.”

All the ponies, except for Pinkie Pie and Rarity (who is still passed out on the floor), have on a look of absolute shock and confusion. Ok, I can’t hold it anymore, I’m going to start giggling like a naughty child now.

“What the heck is with you!?” Rainbow Dash exclaims. This only make me laugh harder.

“Hahaha! Oh man, haha, I’m sorry I’m just having too much fun right now! Hahahahaha!”

Pinkie Pie is the only other being in the room that’s laughing with me right now.

“Heh heh heh heh (sigh). Alright, enough of that, it’s story time.” I say before sitting myself down in a crossed leg position.

“Oh goody, I love story time!” Pinkie Pie exclaims while zooming to sit next to me. Fluttershy lays down on the other side of me while Celestia brings her self down to the floor across from me. Soon the others follow her example by sitting or laying down, creating a circle almost as if there was a campfire in the middle. Save for one.

“So, uh, is anybody going to wake her up?” I say while jutting my chin towards Rarity.

“I got it,” Rainbow Dash says before flying over to the unconscious unicorn. She lands next to her, grabs her by the shoulders, lifts her up...

And then starts violently shaking her.

“Hey fashion freak! Wake up!”

I raise my eyebrows as I really did not see that coming.

Rarity, thanks to the constant shaking, finally responds.

“Gah! Release me this instant!”

Rainbow Dash complies with a huge grin plastered on her muzzle.

Rarity fixes her mane up a bit before saying, “Honestly, Rainbow Dash, was that really necessary?”

“Maybe not,” Rainbow Dash replies with a chuckle (or is it a giggle, can’t tell with how tomboyish her voice is), “But I’ve always wanted to do that.” Rainbow Dash then returns to her spot in the circle.

Rarity huffs in annoyance before bringing her attention to the rest of us. The moment she sees me, she goes completely stiff and wide eyed.

“Miss Rarity,” Celestia says with a smile, “do join us, won’t you? Our good creator guest and I were just about to start explaining some things.”

Rarity first looks at Celestia, then the other girls, and then finally at me again.

“Hey, how you doing?” I ask.

I think Rarity’s having a harder time recovering than usual.

“Oh, for da love ah~ Rarity, get yer overly pampered hind quarters over here!” Applejack exclaims.

That got Rarity out of her stupor.

“Alright, alright. No need to be rude.” Even after saying that, Rarity still looks hesitant. Finally, she joins the circle and takes a seat in between Rainbow Dash and Celestia.

“Alright, now where should we begin?” I ask.

“First of all,” Celestia responds, “we have not acquired your name.”

“Alright. My name is Joseph Conrad.”

“It is an honor to meet you, lord Joseph. I assume you already know all of our names.”

“Yea, you could say that.”

“What kind of name is Joseph Conrad?” Pinkie Pie asks, “That sounds just silly.”

“Pinkie Pie!” Twilight exclaims.

“What?”

“Don’t be rude. If Princess Celestia herself calls him lord, then he’s obviously somepony important.”

I really don’t think I’m that important. But, hey, why stop them from thinking so? Applejack speaks next.

“Well, uh, yer... lordship, how do ya know our names anyhow?”

Ah crap, this question. Should I tell them the truth or try making something up? You know, I’ve read enough fan fics to know that keeping it a secret can come back and bite you in the ass. I might as well be truthful upfront. That’s what my parents taught me to do, after all. I have a sudden reminiscence of what and who I’m never going to see again. Damn... I’m going to miss them.

“Lord Joseph?” Celestia asks, breaking me from my thoughts.

“Huh?”

“Are you alright, my lord?”

“Yea... I’m fine.” I say next with a smile. Fluttershy nudges my hand with her muzzle. I look down and see sadness and worry in her eyes. Yea, she knows exactly what I was thinking about.

“Anyway,” I say quickly while bringing my attention back to the rest of the circle, “to answer your question, Applejack, I’m just going to say right now that this is going to sound extremely creepy.”

I pause for dramatic effect. The sadist in me is giggling with glee.

“My entire species, is watching you.”

I need a camera! I’d make a killing on selling pictures of the looks they have now. Pinkie Pie, however, doesn’t even seem phased.

“Excuse me!?” Rarity exclaims, clearly shocked.

“Or at least something around those lines...” I continue as if I hadn’t heard her.

“What the hay do ya mean ‘watchin’ us’!?” Applejack yells out. Fluttershy is hiding behind her main, Rainbow Dash and Twilight are frantically looking about, Rarity is staring at me with shock while Applejack is doing so in a mixture of anger and terror, and Celestia looks like she’s trying her best to wrap her head around this revelation.

Maybe we humans are just natural trolls, because I am enjoying this way too much. I think my shit eating grin is what’s pissing off Applejack so much.

“Ok, ok, in order for you to understand this I need to explain a few things.”

(Insert long and overly tedious explanation here)

“So, you girls understand now?”

They are all just sitting there with their mouths loose and their eyes wide, including Celestia. Pinkie Pie, once again, does not seem even phased.

“That’s....” Twilight begins, “Amazing! Even without magic your species are capable of so much!”

If she only knew the kind of things we’re “capable of”.

“I honestly cannot fathom what life would be like without magic.” Rarity states.

“Well, it helps to have these babies.” I say while holding up one of my hands.

Celestia doesn’t seem all that thrilled. She looks more confused right now.

“I don’t understand. How is it that humanity cannot use magic?”

I raise an eyebrow as I say, “What’s so hard to understand? Griffins can’t use magic, right?”

“But my father could,” Celestia blurts out. All the other ponies stare at her in confusion.

I let out a sigh. “Your father... was Ragnarok, wasn’t he?”

Celestia looks to me, surprise evident in her features.

“H-how do you know?”

This is going to get emotional real quick, I just know it. I can’t even help but sound solemn.

“He... came to me in my dreams. He explained to me why I’m here, as well as how the world came to be as it is now.”

Celestia is beyond shocked now.

“How is that possible? My father has been~” Celestia hesitates before releasing a trembling sigh and continuing, “he’s been dead for over three thousand years.”

I know this is going to be hard for her to take, considering how she is now. But I think she deserves to know his final fate.

“His body has been dead for that long, yes, but his soul continued to live on. He kept himself conscious through his affiliation with the worlds magic and his own will. That’s at least what he told me.”

Celestia stays silent for a few seconds. Then she speaks again.

“Can... can I speak with him?” She asks, almost hopefully.

Damn, I was hoping she wouldn’t ask that. I solemnly look away, not really sure if I should tell her. I let out a sigh before looking back towards her. Her eyes are begining to water, guess she took the hint.

“I’m sorry, after he finished talking to me, he went to his final rest.”

Celestia nodded in understanding as tears streaked down her cheeks. The rest of the ponies are also saddened to see their ruler in such a state. Twilight puts a comforting hoof on Celestia’s shoulder, trying what she can to comfort her loving mentor. I’m not really sure what I should say at this point since I’d be lying if I said I could relate. I decide to keep silent.

I feel something nudge my hand. I look down and see Fluttershy nuzzling it, her eyes watery and looking up at me. The look in her eyes show concern, but it’s directed towards me. Why? I’m not the one who just found out that my father was still alive in spirit up until a day ago. Either way, I give her a reassuring smile as I begin to stroke her mane.

I feet her stiffen for a second before she begins to lean her head into my hand. She gives out a content sigh as she closes her eyes in what I can only assume is bliss. I honestly had no idea that petting a pony could have this kind of reaction. She is really cute like this.

I become completely oblivious to anything other than the pony that I’m petting. The sounds of her humming is just so cute that I want nothing more than to keep them coming. I scratch behind her ear and I swear it sounds like she’s purring. She snuggles up closer to me, a smile on her muzzle and her eyes peacefully closed.

….

Is it just me, or did it get really quiet in here? I look up from Fluttershy to see the entire circle staring at us. I stop petting Fluttershy for a moment.

“What?” I ask. Quite foolishly, I realize later.

Fluttershy opens her eyes and looks up. The moment she sees everypony staring at us, she immediately scoots away from me with a quiet squeak. She bashfully looks at the floor, her long mane failing to hide the huge blush on her muzzle. I feel a little embarrassed myself, with them staring and all.

“Uh, what the heck were you just doing?” Rainbow Dash breaks the silence.

“Um.... Petting her?” I say awkwardly.

“That looks like fun!” Pinkie Pie exclaims suddenly. “OOH OOH, ME NEXT ME NEXT!”

Pinkie Pie immediately leans her head toward me, as if she were presenting her poofy mane to me.

“Uh, sure,” I say before bringing my hand to her mane. Pinkie’s mane is just as soft as Fluttershy’s, but it feels more like putting my hand through pure cotton candy. I reach her scalp and begin to scratch in a forward-backward motion.

“Hey, this does feel good.” Pinkie says as her eyes close. I guess ponies have a thing for getting petted. I begin to scratch her behind the ear and Pinkie responds by humming contently. Not only that, though, but her hind hoof starts shaking as if she were a dog. I find this both extremely adorable and amusing at the same time.

I stop when I hear somepony clear their throat and Pinkie Pie let’s out a disappointed “aaaaawwwww. I look up and Celestia has this look in her eyes. I can’t really tell what it is. Maybe... longing? Naw, that’s stupid.

“Anyway,” I hear Twilight begin, “As, interesting as this is, I still have some more questions. First of all, of all the ponies in Equestria, why us? Why do humans watch us?”

I smile at this. “Well, when you think about it, it’s pretty much a no brainer. What do you six girls have that no other pony has?”

“Ausomeness?” Rainbow Dash suggests immediatly.

“Class?” Rarity suggests next.

“PARTIES?”

“Uh, Pinkie, ah’m sure otha ponies have parties, too.” Applejack says.

“Yea, but they don’t have my parties.”

Celestia gives me the answer I’m looking for.

“The Elements of Harmony.”

“Correct,” I say, “You girls have saved Equestria twice over thanks to your affiliation with the Elements of Harmony. That, combined with your diverse characteristics, makes you girls the perfect cast for a good show.”

“Well, as flattered as I am, I do not feel comfortable with an entire species spying on me for mere entertainment.” Rarity says with a huff.

“Well, in all honesty, we don’t even know we’re spying on you. To us, you’re all fictional characters that don’t exist. Take your Daring Doo books for example. When you read them, do you ever stop and think that you may be seeing the life of a real life pony as you read? No, you’re just reading a well written story of a fictional character. It’s basically the same thing.”

All the ponies nod their heads in understanding.

“Though, we do get attached to background ponies that don’t even have any lines like Lyra and Bon Bon.”

Wait, they look confused now. Why are they confused?

“Uh, mister Joseph,” Pinkie Pie begins, “there are no ponies named Lyra and Bon Bon in Ponyville.”

Wait, what!?

“You sure?” I ask surprised.

“Oh yea, definitely sure. After all, I know all ponies in Ponyville. And all donkeys, mules, and goats, too.”

How is this possible? I thought this was the Equestria we all see in the show.

“What about Doctor Whooves?”

They all shake their heads.

“Colgate?”

They shake their heads again.

“Vynel Scratch? Berry Punch? Carrot Top? Octavia?”

Their reactions are the same for all the names I ask: a shake of their heads.

“Well, crap. What about Derpy?”

“Ooh, I know her,” Pinkie blurts out, “but she doesn’t really like being called that. Her real name is Ditzy Doo.”

I sigh with relief. “Alright, at least I got one right, so now I don’t look like a total idiot.”

I hear a few giggles from the girls. I guess they found that amusing. Another thought comes to me, however.

“Hey Fluttershy, you still stared down a full grown dragon once, right?”

“Um, y-yes.” She responds timidly, probably not used to being in the spotlight.

“Ok, and was this dragon red?”

“Uh, n-no. He was g-golden.”

Crap, smudge number two.

“Ok, maybe we aren’t really watching you, per say. Maybe Lauren Faust just gets the major details and uses those to make the show.”

I have a sudden flashback of my meeting with Ragnarok. “So she has succeeded.” Was he talking about Lauren Faust? Highly probable, all considering.

“Who is this, Lauren Faust?” Celestia speaks for the first time since she discovered her father’s final fate.

“She’s the person who is credited with making your cartoon.”

“She sounds important.” Rarity speaks next.

“Heh, well to the brony community, she definitively is.”

“Brony community? What’s that?” Twilight asks next.

“That’s what my people call people like me. You see, your show was originally meant for little girls, but got pretty popular with teenage guys. We call ourselves Bronies by combining the words ‘brother’ and ‘ponies’. It’s a... unifying term, I guess.”

Applejack speaks up next.

“Jus out ah curiosity, how is it that you speak Equestrian?”

I shrug.

“Don’t know, sounds like English to me.”

“May I ask where your species are from?” Rarity asks.

“Didn’t I explain that with the whole ‘watching you’ shpeel?”

They all shake their heads.

“Huh.... Well, my species are from a planet that we call Earth. As to where that is in relation to here I have no idea.”

Fluttershy already knew this, so she doesn’t look nearly as surprised as the rest of them.

“So, you’re not even from this planet?” Rainbow Dash asks.

“Nope.”

“So you’re an alien?” Pinkie Pie speaks up, “That is so NEAT-OH! Do some alien stuff!”

“Um, well apparently I’m not that alien.” The moment I say that, I begin to think about Ragnarok and all that he told me. I wonder if Celestia even knows about all that?

“Um, Princess?”

“Please, you do not need to call me by such a formal title when you are of such higher status.”

Wut?

“Uh, I’m not that high of status. I just got here.”

“Yes, but the fact that you are a creator makes you of much higher status than me.”

“Ok, now that’s where I have to disagree. You are the ruler of a country, a goddess of the sun, and you have literally thousands of years of experience. Me? I’m just an 18 year old kid who’s been ripped from his home and stranded here with no other directions other than to not die.”

Everypony, except for Fluttershy, look surprised at this revelation.

“You.... You did not come here of your own accord?” Celestia asks.

“No, your good ol’ dad brought me here during my sleep.”

The others are starting to get teary eyed. They must have figured out that I can never see my friends and family again.

“By the way, I just want to know. Why do you keep how Equestria was originally formed a secret?”

All the other ponies look confused.

“What do you mean,” Twilight says first, “We all know that Equestria was created by the joining of the three pony tribes.”

I remain silent, but I do give Celestia a look that says, ‘Would you like to explain?’

A solemn look comes over Celestia, and the other ponies notice this.

“Your highness?” Rarity asks cautiously.

A few moments of silence pass. Finally Celestia lets out a long sigh before speaking.

“My little ponies... I have a confession to make.”

I can tell that they are already disturbed.

“Equestria... was not formed by three pony tribes. It was created, by my father.”

Needless to say, the ponies are in shock, even Pinkie Pie this time.

“What?” Twilight breaths, “W-Why?”

“Yea, that is a good question,” I say next. “Why lie about it?”

In hindsight that was actually a really dick thing to say.

Celestia looks down in... shame?

“In truth, the reason for it is more selfish on my part. Before, I had always made the excuse that the story taught the importance of friendship and harmony, but I was only lying to myself. Only when Luna became Nightmare Moon did I realize that the reason I had lied all these years, was because the pain of remembering my father was too great for me. Of course, by then Hearts Warming Eve had become a vital part of Equestrian culture, and I dare not shatter it.”

“Sorry if I sound kind of cold right now, but why would being reminded of your own father be painful?”

“Becuase...” Celestia lets out another trembling sigh. “I am the reason he is dead.”

The other ponies gasp at this. Well shit, now I feel like a dick. I should have known she’d blame herself.

“Sorry.” I say next. I really mean it, too. I don’t want to see Celestia like this. Heck, I bet she’s shed more tears this morning than she has for the past century.

She doesn’t respond as tears begin to run down her cheeks and drip from her jaw line. Her head is hanging low and I can tell she’s trying to hold it in. She’s probably held it in for who knows how long. I need to do something.

I get to my feet and make my way to where Celestia is sitting. I’m not really sure what I’m doing but I’ll give it a shot. The others are looking at me confused. I ignore them for now as I bring myself to my knees right in front of Celestia. She looks up at me, her eyes filled with sadness and tears. Well, here goes nothing.

I bring my arms around her slender neck, and bring her into as comforting a hug as I can muster.

“It’s not your fault.” I whisper comfortingly (at least I hope it’s comforting), “He doesn’t blame you, and he never has.”

She’s starting to tremble in my arms. I really never thought I’d see this side of her, especially so soon.

“H-how can you b-be so sure?”

“He told me how it happened, and I can say for a fact that he never blamed you for it.”

“Princess, have you held this in for a long time now?”

I can feel her nod over my shoulder.

“I... don’t know if the same goes for immortals, but usually, if you're holding a sad feeling within yourself, it helps to let it out.”

“B-but~”

“You are among friends here, its ok to cry this once.”

That did it. Only a second after I say that, Celestia presses her muzzle into my shoulder and cries. Her wings are limp at her sides and her main flows around me. I just kneel there and hold her as she weeps into my shoulder. The other girls soon surround us and join us in a group hug, tears forming in their eyes as well. I stroke her neck a bit to try and comfort her. I really hope this is helping her cause I have no idea. I’ve never really been in a situation like this before.

I can’t tell if it’s minutes or hours that are going by, but we all stay like this until Celestias weeping mellows down to mere sobs. Even then we don’t stop hugging her until she’s cried her all. Finally, the sobbing stops. I pull away slightly as the girls give us a bit of room. My shoulder and half of my chest is virtually soaked in tears. Her eye that isn’t covered by her mane is still slightly red and she still has tears on her cheeks.

I softly wipe away the tears that are left with my thumb before asking, “So.... Feel better?” Please say yes.

Celestia gives me a smile and says, “Actually, I do. Thank you, my lord.”

Yes! Thank god it worked.

“Great!” Pinkie Pie suddenly yells out while popping up right between me and Celestia, half startling us both.

“Now that Princess Celestia is feeling better, we should totally celebrate with a PARTY!!”

I chuckle at this while Celestia gives a little giggle. Leave it up to Pinkie Pie to get everybody’s spirits up again.

Seeing as my immediate mission is complete I get back to my feet and stretch my back a bit.

“Well,” I say after I finish stretching, “this has certainly been one of my more interesting mornings.”

“I think that can be said for all of us,” Celestia responds with a giggle.

“So, now wha~”

SLAM!!!

I jump a bit when I hear the door suddenly slam open. I whirl around to face the door, and guess who I see?

“Sister!? Are thou he~”

Yep, Luna. She looks like her second season form... character... self... however you say it. It’s second season Luna, there.

Ok, step back to reality now (or whatever counts as reality here). Luna is looking at me with a very shocked look on her face. No one else is saying anything. It’s like time has just frozen.

Wait a minute, that look on her face is a lot like what Celestia had when she first saw me.

Uh oh....

Eyes are tearing up....

Huge smile is forming....

I think I know what’s coming next.

“DADDY!!!!”

OH GOD NOT AGAIN!

And It Finally Begins

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Author's Note: Hey guys, sorry this took so long to get updated, but with school and college and stuff like that, It was kinda hard to find the time. I’ll try to keep the schedule for updating to stay at a consistent two-week interval. If I can get a chapter up earlier than I will. Let me know how I’m doing and if there is anything I can or need to work on. Thanks guys.

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Ow...

My head is killing me.

I’m seeing stars. Must have hit my head on something.

No, wait, that’s just Luna’s mane.

Wait wut?

Oh yea, I just got tackled by a pony princess... again. I shift the star speckled mane out of my face and see that the mane six are, once again, in shock. Celestia, on the other hand, is trying not to giggle her flank off as she has a hoof pressed to her mouth. Luna’s rubbing her head on my chest as she hugs me tightly (not as tight as Celestia did, though). Holy shit... She is ADORABLE like this! It’s really going to suck when she finds out the truth.

“So,” I say to Celestia, “Do you want to tell her, or me?”

“What?” Luna asks confused as she brings her head up.

“Oh, I don’t know,”Celestia says while still giggling, “You two do look kind of cute like that.”

Really, Celestia, really? Luna is taking a closer at me now and I think she’s come to the conclusion herself.

She instantly gets off of me while blushing furiously through her dark blue coat.

“Wha~,” Luna suddenly shakes her head, looks at me angrily, and lets loose with the Royal Canterlot Voice.

“WHAT BE THE MEANING OF THIS!? WHY DOTH THOU IMPERSONATE AS OUR DADD~ ER, FATHER!?”

Wow, that actually hurt my ears a bit. Fus Ro Da much? I can see that the mane six are cringing, too. Fortunately, Celestia comes to my aide.

“Luna, he is not impersonating. He just looks strikingly similar to our father.”

Luna looks at Celestia for a moment, her facial expression a mixture of embarrassment, surprise, and a little anger trying to hide the other two. Then she looks to me, and her features soften. She sighs in what I think is disappointment.

“We... see. But thou are still a Creator, are thou not?”

“Uh... yea.”

Luna is silent for a moment, probably trying to force her blush down. Then she bows to me (mental capacity straining!).

“In that case, we apologize for our brash actions. Can thou forgive us, my lord?”

Oh great, now she’s calling me that. I don’t think I’m ever going to get used to this.

“It’s ok,” I respond with a smile, “Hell, Celestia did the same thing not too long ago.”

Luna looks at Celestia with surprise while Celestia looks away with a slight blush and a sheepish grin. The other girls giggle at this.

“So,” I say next, “Can someone fill her in or do I have to start all over again?”

“I’ll do it,” Celestia responds, and so she begins.

(Insert tedious and just all around unnecessary recap here)

Luna took the news of Ragnarok rather well. She did get a bit teary-eyed, but she kept her composure. I have this feeling that she’s holding it in, too, but I’m not going to press the matter now.

“That...,” Luna starts, “is quite a lot to think about.”

“I know right?” I say next, trying to lighten the mood.

I don’t think it worked... God I hate awkward silences.

“Well, anyway,” Twilight begins, “ I think we should continue.”

There is suddenly a loud growling noise that fills the room and gives the girls a start.

“Heh, well my stomach respectively disagrees,” I say jokingly.

“Oh, that’s right,” Fluttershy says next, “you never got a chance to eat breakfast.”

“Nope, cause SOMEPONY decided it was a good idea to use mass teleportation before I got the chance.” This gets me another sheepish grin from Celestia.

“That’s a mighty bit harsh, aint it?” Applejack says next accusingly.

“I’m kidding.”

“Oh.”

“So, what is there to eat in this place, anyway?” I ask Twilight.

“Sorry, but this is just a library. I may live here, but this establishment was not designed for permanent occupancy.”

“.... Sooooooo, no food then?”

“No, not at the moment. Sorry.”

“Tsk, damn.”

“OOH OOH!” Pinkie Pie says suddenly, “What about this, mister lord Joseph sir?”

I look over and find that Pinkie Pie has a blue cupcake with red frosting in one of her hoofs and is holding it out towards me. I suddenly have flashbacks of a certain infamous fan fic, but I manage to hold them down before they really affect me.

“Pinkie Pie,” Twilight says next, “Where did you get that?”

“From one of my emergency cupcake staches.”

Why am I not surprised?

“Works for me,” I say before swiping the cupcake off of her outheld hoof.

Without any inhibition, I take a large bite out of the baked good.

Wow.

It tastes just like blueberry with cherry and is perfectly moist. Needless to say, it tastes AWESOME!

“This is pretty good,” I say after my first swallow and follow up with another bite.

“I’m glad you like it,” Pinkie Pie cheerfully states, “If you like I could totally make more once I get back to the bakery.”

My mouth is too full to answer right now since I finished off the rest of the culinary delicacy with one bite.

“Well,” Celestia begins just as I swallow, “Now that your hunger has been sated, let’s continue. I am quite interested in your world now.”

“I concur,” Twilight says next, “In fact, I am very interested in your world.”

“Well don’t expect this to be a one sided Q&A,” I state plainly, “I have a few questions about how things are run around here, myself.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem,” Twilight responds, “How about we takes turns. We ask you something and then you ask us something, and so on?”

I answer with a shrug and a “Sure”.

“Very well,” Celestia speaks next, “I will start.”


And so for the next several hours, we swapped questions and answers. They asked me about human culture and technology, what my planet looked like, who raised and lowered the sun, who controlled the weather, were there ponies where I came from; you know, those types of things, and I tried my best to answer without giving away too much of our human tendencies towards violence and war. Needless to say, they were all very surprised that no one controlled the weather or the sun and the moon. Their reaction to how many humans there are was also one of awe and shock. Apparently, there are only about five million ponies in the entire world compared to our population of seven billion.

In return, I asked what Celestia does besides “raise the sun”. Being the royalty she is, Celestia has to manage a few diplomatic meetings, attend meetings on public policy; political stuff. I personally hate politics, so I stopped her before she went into too much detail. I also asked what this planet is called, and come to find out it’s called Earth, too. Then I asked how big Equestria is and if there were any other nations that shared Equestria’s borders. Celestia let Twilight answer that one and she told me that Equestria is in fact its own continent, and that the other major countries of Earth include the Griffin Empire, the nation of Zebobwa, which is mainly comprised of zebra tribes, and the United Minotaurian Isles.

There are a few minor countries here and there, but they’re not really important. Kinda like the country of Malta in Europe. Seriously, if I hadn’t taken that Physical Geography class, I would have never known it existed.

But I’m getting off topic here. We continued to exchange questions and answers for a little while now, and I began to absent mindedly pet Fluttershy again. But then, they had to ask that question.


“So,” Twilight began, “We know that humans eat cupcakes, but what else do you eat?”

Ah crap. That question. I have no idea how they are going to react to the truth. I look over to Celestia and Luna to see their reactions, and they don’t seem to be giving off any negative feelings, so that’s a good sign.... I hope. Wait, I’m vegan. What am I worrying about?

“Well, humans are naturally omnivorous, but I’m personally a vegan by choice.”

And the reaction is!?!?!

….

….

Surprisingly calm.

“Sooooo, it doesn’t scare you or creep you out at all that my species eat meat?”

“Well,” Rarity speaks up, “in all honesty I find the idea of eating meat quite distasteful, but you are what you are, and that’s how it is.”

Woot! Score one for Love and Tolerance!

Then my stomach grumbles again.

“You know, now that I think about it, I don’t think one cupcake is going to tide me over very well. Got any more?”

“Oh sure,” Pinkie Pie immediately says before speeding off in a streak of pink and returning with a full plate of cupcakes.

“Cool, thanks,” I say before taking the whole plate and setting it down in front of me.

As I picked up the first cupcake, my thought process made me realize a few things

One, I’m still petting Fluttershy with one hand, and she is really enjoying it.

Two: “Hey, where's Spike?”

Twilight let out a sigh before saying, “Oh, he’s probably still sleeping. He is a very heavy sleeper, even for a dragon.”

“Ok,” I say next. And the last thing that I realized: “So when do I get to learn how to do magic? Cause in hindsight that’s probably the first question I should have asked.”

Twilight speaks up at this, “Well, in my experience, you would first have to get the basics down and then-”

“Twilight,” Celestia interrupts, “Knowing what I know about my father, I think our lord’s ability to use magic is different than with unicorns.”

You know, I haven't even tried to use magic yet. The problem is that I don’t even know how. Maybe if I try to do something, it will happen. Let’s try reaching within myself.

… Nope, don’t feel anything different.

Ok, how about focusing on something.

… Nope.

“My lord?” I hear Celestia ask.

“Huh? Sorry, I was a little out of it there.”

“Were you trying to use magic?”

“Uh, yea. How did you know?”

“You looked like you were concentrating, that and you stopped stroking Fluttershy’s mane.”

“Which she did seem to enjoyeth very well, we might add,” Luna interjected. Fluttershy gives off a huge blush, but doesn’t leave her place by me. In fact, it’s like she’s sinking closer to me. I now just notice that her wings are jutting straight out. Maybe it’s true what they say about wingboners.

“Luna, don’t you think you should be practicing a more modern dialect?” Celestia asks.

“Oh, of course, sister.”

Celestia brings her attention back to me and says, “Now, according to my father, all he had to do was imagine something happening or changing, and it would happen.”

“That simple?” I ask.

“That simple. At least that’s how he made it sound like.”

“Well... I’ll give it a shot.”

I close my eyes again, and think. I imagine that there’s a bottle of water in front of me, cause I’m pretty thirsty now. I open my eyes, and there’s nothing there.

“Hmm, maybe a different approach,” I say out loud. I close my eyes again, but this time reach my hand out and imagine that there is a water bottle materializing in front of me.

Still nothing. Ok, let’s try imagining that I’m creating a water bottle with magic.

Instantly, I hear what kinda sounds like the humming of power, and then the gasps of almost everypony in the room. I open my eyes to witness the final bits of the bottled water materializing before me in an emerald glow that also covered my outstretched hand. And then the glowing subsides and only the bottle of water is left sitting there on the floor.

The mane six are absolutely astonished, while the alicorn sisters are smiling knowingly.

Did I really do it? I reach for the plastic bottle, and grip the solid matter. Feels like I did it. I pick it up, unscrew the cap, and take a sip. Sure tastes like I did. I take another drought, and then screw the cap back on as I just sit there.

....
....

Wait for it.

....

“YYEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!”

I am immediately on my feet, pumping my fists in the air. I did magic! What now, Bronies! What now!

“Whu... but.... how!?” exclaims an exasperated Twilight, “How did you just create something from nothing like that!?”

“Don’t know, don’t care! This is awesome!”

“Didn’t I tell you, Twilight?” Celestia says with a smile. I sense a disturbance in the troll-force. “Humans are the most powerful magical beings in existence.”

Twilight’s jaw is practically on the floor, as is Rarity’s. The others aren’t as affected. Probably because they don’t use magic and as such don’t understand the gravity of that statement.

Uh, I just noticed that Luna is giving me this look. I don’t know how to describe it but it’s creeping me out. It’s like she’s just looking me up and down while... oh god she just licked her lips. I am officially freaked out now. Can’t let it show though, gotta keep my cool. I have the sudden urge to get dressed now, cause I feel really naked under those eyes.

I imagine that the magic is creating clothing around me, but this time I keep my eyes open to see it happen. And viola, the same green glow from before surrounds my entire body and takes the shape of the clothes I want. When the glow subsides, I find myself wearing a pair of black jeans, my black tactical boots, a green shirt with a monkey head made out of musical instruments printed on it, and my favorite black leather, padded, motorcycle jacket.

“Ah, much better,” I say next as I continue to look over my newly formed clothes. My mind is reeling with the possibilities. So many things I could do. So many things I could make. This is so Awesome!!!

“Awwww,” Rarity whines, “And here I thought I would be able to design some clothes for you. I still might, though. No offence, my lord, but those are just a tad bit... drab, dull even. Maybe if you added a bit more color...”.

“Nah,” I respond, “I think the black with green is pretty cool.”

“Yea, it’s kinda cool.” Rainbow Dash speaks up.

“Sooooo cooooooool,” Pinkie Pie practical coos, “OOH! What else can you make?”

“Hmm....” I think for a moment. What could I make that they would find appealing. Then I get an idea.

I suddenly bring my hand up to point my index finger at Pinkie Pie. Then a flash of green comes first from my finger, and then from the party pony herself. After the flash, Pinkie Pie is left standing there with some new additions to her body.

Pinkie Pie looks around before saying, “Wait, did that do anythi- Why is everpony looking at me like that?”

The rest of the room (besides me) are starring at Pinkie Pie in awe. She’s not taking the hint, so I’ll help her.

“Look behind you.”

Pinkie Pie turns her head and says, “What’s behind me? I don’t see any-
HHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!”

Pinkie Pie takes in a long gasp, not unlike the one she took in the very first episode, and stares at the newly formed pink, feathered wings attached to her back.

“Whu... how the... but the... SQUUUUUEEEEEE!!!”

“Whoa there, it doesn’t really matter that much if they don’t work. Try them out.” God I hope they work. I’m really not sure how specific I have to be with my imagination so this is a good test.

Pinkie gives a look like she’s concentrating, only a second later, her wings slowly expand and I take a step back from her to give her room. A few second later, they do a slow, single flap. Pinkie pie opens her eyes again with the largest smile possible. She then begins to flap her new wings as hard as she can, but she doesn't budge an inch.

“I think you need to make her bones lighter, too,” Rainbow Dash speaks up.

“Oh, yea, I guess that would help.” Even though I say that, I decide to use a different approach. I decide to just imagine casting a spell on Pinkie Pie that can allow her to fly, instead of just having wings.

The effect is instantaneous.

“WHOA!” Pinkie Pie cries out as she suddenly finds herself far above the ground before giving a grunt of pain as her head comically hits the ceiling. She’s able to regain her senses before she hits the ground again and hovers in place above us with a steady and repeating beat of her new wings.

“THIS IS SO COOL!” Pinkie Pie yells out in jubilation, “I’ve always wanted wings! Can I keep them?! Please!? PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE-”

“Yes, you can keep them,” I say with a chuckle.

“YAY!!!” Pinkie Pie yells out before fly to me and giving me a big hug around the neck, while keeping herself in the air with her wings, and saying,
“THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!!!”

She then proceeds to fly around the library like a maniac on crack.

I have this sudden itch to troll again, and it must be scratched.

“You know, where I come from, there is a lot of fan art of you girls. Wanna see a piece?”

They all nod and say sure and all that. I think I’ll suppress the troll for now and show them something that they would actually like. I search through my memory for a good one. I smile when one comes to mind and then I make it appear on the wall with a flash of emerald.

This is what the girls see.

The girls are speechless, as are the princesses. Then Rainbow Dash speaks up.

“I. Look. So. AUSOME!”

“I thought you'd like it,” I state, “I personally like how Spike looks in this. Manly Spike is best Spike, if you ask me.”

“Very interesting,” Luna says, “And your kind made this?”

“One of my kind, yes. We humans can get pretty creative with our art. And this piece is but one of millions.”

You know, after seeing the looks of adoration that the mane six have while looking at the picture on the wall, I’ve decided to hold down my inner troll. I really just don’t have the heart to show them the... more questionable pieces.

“I must say,” I hear Rarity speak, “Spike does look quite... noble in this picture.”

“Yea...” Twilight speaks next, “But that is definitely not what the dragon anatomy looks like. The legs are too thin and his jaw is too flat. Not to mention that there are absolutely no records that state dragons wore clothing or armour.”

“We know what Spike looks like when he matures,” I speak up, gaining Twilight’s attention, “but we still like to let our imaginations wander. I still think he looks badass in this pic.”

The others suddenly turn towards me with confused looks.

“Badass? wha’ in tarnations does tha’ mean?” Applejack asks.

Oops, I guess I let my tongue slip there. “Oh, it just means that he looks cool.”

The other look at me for a few seconds, and then shrug in unison before turning back to observe the picture.

“So, Celestia,” I say next, “What now?”

“Now,” Celestia answers, “I think it’s time that the truth was known to all of Equestria. We go to Canterlot, where I will let all of Equestria know of you.”

“And you’re going to do that, how exactly?”

“Well through magic, of course. I know a spell that allows for every city, town, and settlement to see important announcements right from their town squares.”

“Convenient.”

“Very much so.”

“Wait,” Twilight speaks up, “Did you say that you’re going to Canterlot?”

“Yes, Twilight,” Celestia answers, “Equestria must know of Lord Joseph’s presence as soon as possible. I don’t want anypony to think that he’s a threat just because of what he looks like.”

“I don’t think he looks all that bad,” Fluttershy speaks up quietly.

“That bad?” I quip.

“Oh, er I mean... uh, what I meant was... well... oh dear,” Flutershy flusters with a blush forming on her muzzle.

“It’s alright, I know what you mean.”

Luna gives a giggle at our antics, but Twilight looks disappointed. Celestia notices and speaks up about it.

“Is there something wrong, my dear pupil?”

“I was hoping I could study him, learn about his culture and anatomy. Things like that...”

“Tell ya what,” I say next, before materializing an anatomy textbook in my hands, “You can have this. It should keep you busy for, what, two... three days?”

I open the book to make sure I got it right and from what I can see, I did. It’s amazing how many blanks that magic can fill when I want to make something. I hand the book to Twilight who takes it out of my hands with her own magic.

She looks at it curiously, before a smile spreads across her muzzle.

“Thank you, my lord, this should be very helpful.” Then Twilight makes a face like she just remembered something before turning to Celestia

“Wait, your highness, what about your assignment on the study of creation magic?”

“Oh, I don’t think we need to worry about that anymore,” Celestia responds, “After all, we have a creation magic master before us now.”

What? “I create two things, and I’m already a master?”

Luna speaks up to answer me. “Considering that no other living being can do what you just did, then yes.”

“O... K then. So when do we leave?”

“I will return to Canterlot and have a chariot brought here to pick you up,” Celestia answers.

“Wait, why don’t we just teleport there?”

“Well, had I not already used a long distance teleportation spell and then a mass teleportation spell in the span of thirty minutes, then I could have. But as it is now, I am too tired to do so. Teleportation can take a lot out of a magic user, even one such as myself.”

“... But that was hours ago.”

“And it will take many more before I am ready to cast another spell like that.”

“... You can raise and lower the sun, a giant ball of flaming gas thousands of times the size of earth that is billions of miles away, on a daily basis, and yet you can’t use a teleport spell to bring you and two other people over the span of a few miles after resting for hours on end.”

Celestia gains a sheepish look before saying, “Well... truth be told I don’t control the sun itself, I actually just keep the planet rotating on its axis.”

There are many gasps from the mane six at this revelation, while I just smile smugly knowing that my hypothesis was correct.

“Still, you manipulate a ball of mass that has a radius of a good few thousand miles on a daily basis. I would think that would still take a considerable amount of power.”

Celestia gives a light giggle before saying, “You would be surprised at how little of a magic push it takes to keep the Earth rotating.”

I roll my eyes before saying, “Ok, but what about Luna?”

I look towards said alicorn and see her scuff at the floor, raising the cuteness level to a new high.

“Well,” Luna starts, “Teleportation spells are not what you would call my... forte.”

“Forte? You need a forte for teleportation spells?”

“What she means,” Celestia speaks up, “is that the last time she tried teleportation, she brought most of the surrounding area with her.”

I look back at Luna and see her blush.

“Tia,” Luna whispers, “you promised that you wouldn’t tell anypony about that?”

“But he isn’t a pony, dear sister,” Celestia whispers back, like a professional troll.

I stifle a chuckle before saying, “Alright, if teleporting is out of the question, then let’s just fly there. I don’t think I need a chariot.”

“Are you sure, my lord? You don’t exactly have any wings for flying.”

This should be good. I close my eyes and concentrate my imagination again. Then I feel myself become absolutely weightless. When I open my eyes, I’m hovering a good five feet above the ground with a green glow covering my entire body, total Green Lantern status.

“Yea, I’m pretty sure.”

All the other ponies are gawking at me, but the Princesses recover quickly.

“Very well,” Celestia says, “then we leave immediately.”

“Ok, hold on a sec,” I respond. I then point at the fan art that I posted (lol) and it disappears with an emerald flash. I then turn to Twilight.

“Hey Twilight, whenever you get bored of that book, send me a letter and I’ll whip up a new one for you, K?”

Twilight nods her head and says, “Sure, Thank you.”

“Alright, let’s go.”

With that the Princesses exit the library, and I’m about to follow when I feel a small tap on my shoulder. I turn around just as I land to see Fluttershy hovering in front of me, looking very bashful.

“Um, so... I guess... this is goodbye,” She says in a sad tone.

“Only for now,” I respond, “I’ll be sure to visit, ok?”

“P-promise?”

“Promise. After all, I still owe you for saving my life, you still owe me that breakfast.”

She lets out the quietest and cutest giggle imaginable before giving me a hug. I gladly return the embrace and we stay that way for a few minutes.

“My lord,” Celestia calls from outside, “Are you coming?”

“Yea, be right there,” I answer. I let go of Fluttershy and she slowly hovers to the ground. She gives me a large smile, which I return, before I bend down to get out the door.

As I exit the Library, I can see that there is a large crowd of ponies gathered around the library. Understandable, considering that both of their rulers popped in to the town unannounced. It’s like looking at variegated lawn of fur, eyes, horns, and wings. As of now, though, I can not spot any ponies that I would recognize from the show.

The moment I get myself back to my full height the entire crowd gasps, and I think a few of the mares fainted.

“Your highness, behind you!” I hear a male pony yell in terror.

Celestia looks back towards me for one second before turning back towards the crowd (which can easily become a mob at a seconds notice). The princess of the sun spread her wings and addressed the crowd loud enough for all of them to hear, but not quite loud enough to be considered the Traditional Canterlot Voice.

“Fear not my subjects! The being you see before you means you no harm! We are going back to Canterlot where I will address all of Equestria on this matter! All will be explained then, so I must ask you all to be patient until that time!”

She then turns back to me and Luna and says, “Come, let us go.”

“Lead the way,” I respond.

With that, Celestia flaps her wings and takes to the air, shortly joined by Luna. I get my magic going again and begin to float with that green glow I’ve come to love. I will/imagine myself to fly high and fast enough to keep pace with the princesses.

Now, normally I would be deathly afraid of heights, but the absolute ausomeness of this isn’t allowing me to be scared. I’ve never felt a rush like this before. The wind blowing through my hair and making my clothes flap as I blissfully sail through the sky. There really aren’t any words that can give this feeling justice.

“We should be there in about a half hour at this speed!” Celestia calls back to me over the roar of the wind.

“OK!” I call back. Then a thought strikes me.

“Hey! Shouldn’t we let them know that we’re coming!? I don’t really feel like getting tackled by a bunch of guards when I land!”

“Of course!” Celestia responds before turning her head towards Luna, “Luna, could you please fly ahead and let them know!?”

“Of course, Sister!” And with that, Luna put on a burst of speed and in a streak of dark and light blue sped ahead of us.

Well, this is it. We are on our way to Canterlot and all of Equestria is going to know about me soon enough. I can’t help but wonder: What am I going to do when I get there?


Fluttershy and her friends stepped out of the library in time to see the princesses and Joseph take off into the blue. Fluttershy let out a heavy sigh as she watched them go. She didn’t quite understand what these feelings were, but when she was close to the human, she felt warm, safe even. Now that he’s gone, she could not subdue the feeling of emptiness within her.

“Hey Rainbow Dash!” Pinkie Pie suddenly exclaims, “I wanna give these things a real test run. Wanna come with me and help me test them out?”

“Sure, Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash responds, “But how about after we eat? I haven’t had breakfast today and it’s already noon.”

“I’m feelin’ mighty peckish ma’self,” Applejack pipes in, “C’mon everypony, ah’ll treat ya’ll to a good lunch, Apple fam’ly style.”

The others agreed and followed Applejack towards her family orchard.

On the way there, Fluttershy couldn’t help but reminisce on the feeling she got from Joseph stroking her mane. It felt comforting and relaxing, in laymen terms, but there really aren’t any words that she can think of to describe it other than that it felt good and so … right.

“Fluttershy, darling?”

Fluttershy is brought abruptly out of her thoughts by the voice of Rarity.

“Yes, Rarity?” Fluttershy responds quietly.

“I can’t help but notice that you were awfully close to Joseph during his short time here. Is there any particular reason as to why?”

Fluttershy cannot even begin to control the blush that is spreading across her muzzle as she answers, “Oh n-no, no reason... really.”

Rarity gives her a sceptical look that tells Fluttershy that the fashion diva was not buying it.

“Er... well... it did feel... nice, when he touched my mane.”

“Just touching your mane felt good?”

“Oh, well, he also scratched the back of my neck... and ears. That felt nice, too.”

Rarity looks away with an indignant huff.

“Well, sounds to me that he was merely treating you as if you were a pet.”

“I wouldn’t really mind that much.”

Rarity looks back at Fluttershy with a start just as the shy pegasus gains an even deeper blush from realizing what she had just said.

“Oh, er... I didn’t mean... uh... what I meant was... um,” Fluttershy flustered over her words in an in vain attempt to save face.

Rarity recovers and lets out a sigh before saying, “It doesn’t really matter now, anyway. Didn’t you see the looks that Princess Luna was giving him?”

Fluttershy found herself suddenly feeling very nervouse.

“Uh... no. What looks?”

“Surely you must have noticed. Princess Luna was running her eyes all over Lord Joseph for hours. In fact, had she not been as regal and civilised as she is, I bet she would have been practically drooling over him.”

“Oh no,” Fluttershy whispers worriedly. She began to feel a new, fiery emotion light within her. She doesn’t know what it is, but it scares her like nothing has scared her before.

Rarity doesn’t even notice Fluttershy’s darkening mood as she continues.

“But it’s not like I can blame her. Joseph does have some... attractive traits. Like those toned muscles, his large and strong form... those sparkling, sapphire eyes... his strong... masculine voice...”

Fluttershy can only watch in near terror as one of her closest friends slowly loses herself within her own fantasies as the white unicorn continues to describe Josephs good qualities, her voice becoming huskier with each trait she names.

“Oh no, not you too,”


...

Cold...

It is so cold here...

No more will she feel this cold.

She is ready.

She was born from jealousy and regret. Now she shall unleash it tenfold upon her hated enemies.

Her first plan had fallen into ruin. Her second plan only more so. But now she is ready. She knows what she must do. Victory will be hers at last. The Elements had been her undoing before, but no longer. They bested her twice before, she will not allow them to do so again.

‘That’s right,’ She thinks to herself as she gazes upon the world below her, ‘They have shunned me for the last time. Equestria will love my night, whether it wants to or not.’

And with that, the spirit of Nightmare Moon descends upon Equestria once more.

___________________________

Some New Lessons

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Authors Note: Ok, so it's been a while. Sorry about that. I can be easily distracted, ya know? Anyway, with how long it took to make this, you are all probably expecting a super huge chapter. Again, I apologize as that is not the case. I hope I'm still keeping your attention with this story, and I really appreciate the support you guys are giving me, even though all that support is from comments. So if you want more chapters, give some more ausome comments =P.
P.S. I seem to have a habit of posting these chapters late at night. Oh well.


The flight to Canterlot was, for lack of a better term, uneventful. Of course, uneventful is a pretty dull word to use when your having the time of your life! But now we’re almost to Canterlot and I am absolutely amazed at the immensity of it. It has to be nothing short of an engineering miracle for an entire city to jut out the side of a mountain. That, or just a butt load of magic. What also amazes me is how intricate the city looks. I thought it was impressive enough on the show, but in person the show doesn't even compare.

As of right now, we are far above the city. Celestia leads me to a lower altitude as we approach the city and as we get closer, I can see Luna fly from the city and towards us. Soon Luna is flying by us again as she talks with Celestia, but I can’t hear what they’re saying. When they stop talking, Celestia turns to me.

“All the arrangements have been made for your arrival, my lord!” Celestia yells over the wind, “We will land in the Royal Courtyard, and then we will go to the dining hall for lunch!”

“Awesome! All I’ve had since I got here was a cupcake and I’m fricken starvin’!”

“We have also seen to your sleeping arrangements!” Luna yells out, but not quite in the Traditional Canterlot Voice, “You will be staying in that tower there!” Luna points out the tower.

“Is that the tower Rarity stayed at during her visit to Canterlot that one time!?”

“It is!” Celestia answers this time.

“Cool!”


Shining Armor liked to think of himself as a stallion prepared for anything. A true credit to the title of Captain of the guard. He was hoof chosen by her royal highness Princess Celestia herself for his stalwart demeanor and his impeccable strength over magic. Though he can be fun and easy going when off duty, he is still capable of holding an air of command when needed.

Right now, Shining Armor is having a very hard time keeping that air of command over his own nervousness as the seemingly giant of a biped comes in for a landing with the royal sisters; the same royal sisters that he had sworn to protect with his life. As the stranger descends, Shining Armor can not help but note the green aura that surrounds it, causing the captain to remember a certain changeling invasion that happened not too long ago. This proves to only add to his suspicions and cautiousness towards the stranger.

Princess Luna had been brief in her instructions: prepare the guest tower for occupancy, get lunch ready, tell the servants that her and her sister’s earlier disappearance is of no cause to worry, and greet the Princesses along with their “guest” upon their arrival. Sounded simple enough... until now.

Shining Armor had made sure to bring at least thirty royal guards along with him, just in case. All thirty of those guards are now lined up behind him in rows of ten.

Princess Celestia touched down first, then her sister next to her, and then the biped behind them. Shining Armor noted the way that the stranger looked over the thirty royal guards that he had brought with him. Appraising their strength, no doubt. He has this smile on his face that just makes him look smug in Shining Armor’s eyes.

“Cooooool,” Shining Armor hears the stranger mutter.

As the Princesses approach, Shining Armor goes into a bow, as do the rest of the guards.

“Your highnesses, it is good to see that you are all right. Despite what Luna had told us, we were all thoroughly worried.”

“Thank you for your concern, Shining Armor, but we are well.”

“Did you say Shining Armor?” The stranger asked.

“That’s right,” Shining Armor answered, “I am Shining Armor, Captain of the Royal Guard and defender of Canterlot.”

“Wow, Captain of the Guard? Didn't see that coming. You’d think that after two seasons Twilight would have mentioned you at least once.”

“Wha... What?” Shining Armor responded, confused.

“Have you already married what’s-her-name? Uh, Cadance?”

Shining Armor is beginning to like this conversation less and less.

“How do you know about that?” Shining Armor asked accusingly.

“Honestly, you don’t wanna know. But I’ll take that as a yes. (Sigh) Damn, I never got a chance to see that episode before I got here. And it was gonna be a bitchen’ episode, too. Though I guess hearing about it would be the next best thing.”

Shining Armor is utterly confused by the gibberish that this biped is saying.

“And no offence, but who the hell is Cadence, anyway?”

“What?” Shining Armor responded, almost seething in anger as the stranger turns back to the Princesses.

“I mean, from what the brony community could tell, you two were the only alicorns in existence. In fact, you two started as the only alicorns in existence. So where did Cadence come from?”

Shining Armor watches as a seemingly cruel smile forms on Princess Celestia’s muzzle while Princess Luna actually blushes. This is the first time that Shining Armor had ever seen the moon princess blush.

“Well,” Celestia says coyly, “I think you will have to ask Luna about that some time.”

“So she is your niece. But Blueblood is your nephew, too...” The stranger then turns to Luna. “You been busy or something, Luna?”

To Shining Armor’s shock, Princess Luna is now blushing even harder. What’s even more appalling, though, is that this stranger would dare show such disrespect to Her Highness.

“Hey!” Shining Armor exclaims, causing the stranger to turn and look at him, “I don’t know who or what you are, but I will not tolerate such insolence towards the royal sisters! Now you will show them the proper respect that they deserve and apologize!”

The stranger merely raises his right eyebrow as a glint of amusement shines in his eyes. Shining Armor is just about ready to teach this hairless ape a lesson, when he catches the looks of the royal sisters.

The captain feels his heart practically turn to ice as he witnesses the looks of absolute shock and appalment that the Princesses are now directing towards him. Shining Armor has the sinking feeling that he had just made a very grave mistake. The guards behind him also become uneasy at the Princesses’ unexpected reaction to Shining Armor’s defence of their honor.

For a few seconds there is only silence. Then Princess Celestia speaks.

“Please forgive him, my lord,” Princess Celestia pleads, “He does not know who you really are.”

In all the history of Equestria, there are only very rare instances when the Royal Guard have ever lost their composure. This is has now become one of those rare instances.

“Whu... bu... how... da... wha...” Shining Armor blubbers as he tries to overcome his own shock. His fellow guardponies are equally affected as all thirty of their jaws are hanging loose.

The stranger, or lord, as Princess Celestia called him, gives off a smile while Princess Luna tries to suppress a giggle at the guard’s reactions.

“Yea, it’s fine; no problem,” the lord says, “So.... Lunch?”

“Of course, my lord,” Princess Celestia responds, “Right this way.”

With that, the royal sisters and the newfound lord head for the main entrance of the castle, leaving Shining Armor and his guards to still get over their shock.


MEANWHILE, BACK IN PONYVILLE


“C’mon, Dashie, hurry up! There is still so much stuff we can do!”

“Can’t (huff) we (huff) take (huff) a little (huff) break?”

Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie have been spending the last twenty minutes testing out the party pony’s new wings over one of the many grass fields of Ponyville. After said twenty minutes of nonstop flying and twirling at top speed, Rainbow Dash is finding it increasingly difficult to keep up with the hyper-energetic pegasus. Pinkie Pie seems to have an unlimited reserve of energy, which would seem surprising considering how much sweets Pinkie Pie eats.

But then again, this is Pinkie Pie we’re talking about.

“Okie dokie lokie,” Pinkie Pie says with a smile. She then zooms to a nearby cloud and brings it closer to the currently mid air and exhausted Rainbow Dash. They soon both land upon the fluffy white cloud that acts like a floating pillow to them. Rainbow Dash settles down with a tired huff, while Pinkie Pie sets her rump down in a simple sitting position. Rainbow Dash can’t help but be amazed at how Pinkie Pie isn’t even breaking a sweat.

“I still can hardly believe that mister Lord Joseph gave me these wings. They are just so much FUN! I wonder what else I can do with them? OOH, do you think I could use these to hold things like hands?”

Rainbow Dash is just starting to get her breath back as she answers, “Sure, I guess. Even if it’s not possible, you'd still probably find a way to do it anyway.”

“Yea, you’re probably right.”

They continue to rest for a few more minutes before Pinkie Pie jumps to her hooves.

“Hey, do you think I could could do a rainboom like you?”

Rainbow Dash scratches her chin in contemplation.

“I don’t know, you need a lot of practice and a little bit of luck to get it right. Not to mention the physical training that is required to reach those speeds. Also you can’t chicken out during your di- uh... Pinkie?”

Rainbow Dash looks around but doesn’t see her hyperactive friend. She looks up and to her horror sees Pinkie Pie climbing as high as she can.

“Pinkie! Wait! It’s dangerous to try a rainboom without knowing how!”

Either Pinkie Pie didn’t hear her or she didn’t pay the blue pegasus any mind as she continues to climb. Then Pinkie Pie reaches an altitude that makes it difficult to breath and decides that this altitude is high enough. With that thought, she turns her snout towards the ground and begins to dive.

Rainbow Dash can only watch in worried terror as her best friend attempts to do the most difficult aerial maneuver known to pony kind.

“WHOOOOHOOOO!!!” Pinkie Pie yells in excitement as she pumps her wings to increase the speed of her descent. Not even the wind can wipe away the smile on her face as it breaks across her muzzle, causing her lips to flap and her eyes to water. A hazy white line begins to form around her outstretched hooves, a physical manifestation of the sound barrier itself. As the party pony gains more speed, the line becomes thicker and begins to bend around her form.

Rainbow Dash is in shock. Pinkie Pie might actually pull it off. She’s almost there... just a little more... and....

BOING!

“WHOA!WHOA!WHOA!!!” Pinkie cries out as the barrier she attempted to break stops her cold before bouncing her back several meters. Rainbow Dash winces slightly as she witnesses Pinkie Pie’s rebound stop in a tree, soon followed up by more winces as Pinkie Pie bounces down the branches before finally landing at the trees roots in a heap.

“Owie...” Pinkie Pie groans.

Rainbow Dash rushes from her cloud perch to her fallen friend, full of worry.

“Oh my gosh! Are you ok?”

“Yea,” Pinkie Pie groans as she slowly gets up and picks the leaves and twigs out of her poofy mane, “Just, remind me not to do that again anytime soon.”

Rainbow Dash finally allows herself a sigh of relief. She won't ever tell Pinkie Pie this, but the blue pegasus is quite relieved that her friend had failed the sonic rainboom. It’s not that she’s worried about her own reputation as the only pegasus that can pull off the most difficult aerial maneuver known to pony kind (... probably). Rainbow Dash was merely worried for Pinkie Pie’s safety had she succeeded. She knew from experience that it is very difficult to control the direction of one’s flight during a rainboom if one didn’t know how to. If Pinkie Pie had pulled it off, she very well could have ended up embedding herself into the ground at supersonic speeds.

“So... still want to take that break?” Rainbow Dash asks sheepishly.

Pinkie Pie merely nods before flying back to the cloud they had previously used and laying down with a huff. Rainbow Dash joins her shortly afterwards to rest up for a bit. A few minutes passed by in silence before both ponies slowly fall asleep for a mid-afternoon nap.


Finally, some food! I am practically drooling at the salads and fruits that are being presented in front of me.

Just for a recap, After we entered the castle we found ourselves, unsurprisingly, in the main hall with the large staircase at the end of it. I’ve seen this place before, but it’s still breathtaking when you are witness to its very size. Several of the servants gasped and stared at me as we walked passed, which is to be expected. I gotta give props to the guards, though. They didn’t even flinch when they saw me.

We went left after ascending the first half of the stairs and immediately entered a huge dining hall. Now when I say huge, I mean HUGE!!! The ceiling has to be at least four stories tall, with five huge, golden, magical chandeliers hanging from it. There are large windows implanted in the wall left of the entrance and tapestries with the sun and crescent moon emblazoned upon them hang along the pristine white walls between marble pillars. In the middle of the gigantic room is an equally huge table resting on a very long, crimson rug. The table is a very dark brown with a long table cloth running its length to match the rug. Intricate chandeliers and flower vases line the middle of the table. Surprisingly enough, the table is roughly human sized and has equally intricate chairs lining it. I was probably wide eyed for a good minute after we entered the dining hall.

When we reached the table, Celestia and Luna took a seat on either side of the head of the table. I asked Celestia why she didn’t take the head of the table, and she answered that it was meant for me from now on. I thought about offering the other head of the table, but then I realized that we would have to constantly yell just to hear each other. After I took my seat, several servants entered the hall either carrying platters of food with magic or balancing said platters on their backs. They seemed hesitant to approach me, but they did eventually lay out the platters before us, presenting us with a large selection of salads and fruits, as well as some hay and flowers here and there.

And thus we return to the present. In hindsight, I could have made myself some food, but too late now. I take a plate with a large green salad and what looks like a vinegar dressing. I then take a fork from my plate setting and immediately chow down. Absolutely delicious! The green leaves have a wonderful earthy taste which is only accented by the sweet and tanginess of the dressing.

For the next twenty seconds all that I know is “OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM!!!” Ok, maybe not quite like that, since I still have the decency to eat with my mouth closed.

Only when I finish the salad and reach for some pears that I notice the sisters staring at me.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Luna answers, “It’s just that, we have never seen anypony eat this fast before.”

“What do ya want from me, I haven't eaten in...” I stop to think for a moment, “... a day and a half. Besides, I’ve always been a fast eater.”

I continue my feast by grabbing the pear that I had previously reached for and taking a large bite out of it. After I swallow, I get the urge to ask something else.

“So what’s going to be the procedure today?”

“Well,” Celestia answers, “First my sister and I shall send letters to all of the mayors in equestria, informing them of the upcoming announcement. We will give them two hours to prepare, and after that we shall make the announcement.”

“Letters via magic?”

“But of course.”

“Cool. So what am I going to do for two hours till then?”

“We could give you a tour of the palace,” Luna suggests.

“Or the city,” Celestia interjected.

“Going into public before the announcement?”

“We would accompany you, of course, to keep the panic down.”

“Yea... I’ll stick to the palace for now.”

“Very well, we will begin the tour when you finish eating.”

“Cool.” And with that, I resume to consume at my previous pace.


Five Minutes Later


“Whew,” I let out as I slump back into my seat. All platters that had been laid out before me are now completely bare, save for the ones that I can’t digest. I chuckle as I see the look of astonishment from the sisters while they stare first at me, then the empty platters, and then me again.

“Yea, I needed that.”

“Apparently...”Luna quietly says.

“So,” I say right before dramatically slamming my palms onto the table and lifting myself out of my chair, “Shall we?”

“Of course, my lord,” Celestia answers, “Luna, would you be so kind as to give our lord the tour? I have a few letters to send.”

“With pleasure,” Luna responds as she gets up onto her own hooves, “If you would just follow me, my lord.”

I respond with a nod.

“See ya later, Celestia.”

“Have a nice tour, my lord,” Celestia responds. With that, Luna leads me out of the dining hall and down one of the connecting corridors.


About thirty or so minutes in the tour, while we’re in the Canterlot Library, I have a sudden thought.

“Hey Luna.”

“Hmm?” Luna responds, looking towards me.

“You keep calling me lord. Is that actually a position, or something?”

“As a matter of fact, it is. My sister and I believe that you should be the successor of our father. We believe it is high time that Equestria be given a true king again.

… wat?

“Whoa, wait a minute.... King?”

“Of course.”

“You plan to crown a person you literally just met today as the ruler of your country. An eighteen-year-old no less.”

“If our father chose you, then he did so for good reason.”

“Yea..... Not happening.”

“W-what?”

“There is no way in hell I’m running a country. One, I hate politics, with a passion. Two, I’m only eighteen years old. Three, I wouldn’t even know how to run a country as a monarch to begin with.”

“Well... we could always teach you.”

“Nope, not happening. It doesn’t take a genius to see that me being king is a really bad idea.”

Luna looks down in disappointment as she says, “I... see.”

Wow, she doesn’t just look disappointed, she looks downright depressed. Everything about her is drooping now: her ears, her wings; hell, even her mane is looking less lively. Either way, though, there is no way I’m ruling a country. Why is she so down about this?

“What’s wrong with there being no king? You two have been doing a good job so far without one.”

“I suppose that’s true...”

“And what about your subjects? How do you think they would feel if a random stranger suddenly became their ruler completely out of the blue?”

“... They would not be happy,” Luna responds. “You are right, my lord. Perhaps my sister and I are just being a little too hasty.”

There is silence for a moment. Then Luna speaks up again.

“It’s just that... having a true king, one our father approved of, would have been just like it was during the golden ages, when our country was just beginning to thrive under our father’s ministrations.”

“I’m sorry...,” I respond, “but I’m not your father.”

Luna only nods, before regaining her composure and stating, “It was a foalish wish, either way.”

Though she is trying to stand tall, I can tell she still feels down about it. Then I come up with an idea.

“Well... I may not ever be king, but I could be a protector of sorts.”

Luna looks up at me with what I believe is a mixture of hope and bewilderment. Not quite sure, though. Maybe it’s just curiosity.

“How so?” She asks.

“Like for... national security and stuff. Whenever there’s an epidemic or disaster, it would be my job to take care of it. That sort of thing.” In hindsight, I would have never suggested this before coming here. But then again, I didn’t have god like powers before I got here.

Luna puts a hoof to her chin as she thinks for a moment. Then she smiles before turning her attention back to me and says, “I believe that can be arranged, my lord.”

“Cool,” I say. Luna looks visibly upbeat now, so that’s good.

“Anyway, shall we continue with the tour?”

Before I can respond, a glint of light catches my eye. I squint in annoyance before looking for the source of the offending light. What I see sparks my curiosity.

“Sure, one moment, though,” I say before heading towards the source of light.

What I find is a mirror. A tall (in pony standards), freestanding mirror at that. The sun had been sending light through the large window nearby and it was being reflected off of the mirror towards me. The reason that I have become so curious with this mirror is that I have yet see my own face since I got here.

I tilt the mirror up a bit so that I can see my own face, and I am stunned at what I see.

Because of how this world is so cartoonish, I don’t have a single strand of body hair on me, save for my pubes. My face is no different. Not even a tiny amount of stubble can be seen. Not only that, but my face has become more masculine, as well. My jaw is more chiseled, my cheek bones are slightly broader. My hair is still short yet curly, and my eyes are more blue. Yet it seems almost like they’re even more so. Before I got here, I had a bit of trouble with teenage-induced acne. Good thing there doesn’t seem to be any acne in cartoons, at least not where they aren’t purposefully drawn. Not even a single black head is visible on my face. All of my negative physical qualities seem to have been stamped out by cartoonish transformation.

I suddenly get a minor trip out as I contemplate how everything is a cartoon, yet tangible as if it were real. Kinda freaky how I’m able to get depth perception in a 2D world.

“Is there something wrong, my lord?”

My thoughts return to the present as I look over to Luna, who is wearing a look of concern.

“No, nothing’s wrong. It’s just that... I’ve never looked quite like this before.”

Luna trots over to my side and looks into the mirror with me.

“I think it is a good look,” Luna says with a smile.

Wait, that can’t be... I look at Luna first from the mirror, then turn to look at her directly. Yep, that’s a blush. Aw, now she’s trying to avoid eye contact. I find this surprisingly cute.

“Thanks,” I finally respond with a smile, “I think it’s a good look, too.”

… And there's that awkward silence again.

“So..., how did the wedding go?”

“Oh,” Luna says with a start. She must have been lost in thought. “well, I wasn’t there myself, but I can tell you what I was told.”

“Sounds good,” I say as we get walking again.


Celestia watches as the last letter burns up in magical fire before the sparkling ash blows away out the nearby window towards the last city. She gives off a sigh as she allows herself to think over the current situation.

A human has returned to Equestria. After nearly three thousand years Equestria can finally have a true king again. Celestia smiles at the thought, before her more rational mind takes hold.

Perhaps he is not fit to be king just yet. He did say he was only 18 years old. But when else is Equestria going to get this chance. Equestria needs a king.

… No... Equestria doesn't need a king, Celestia realizes, she wants there to be a king. To have another human, like father, rule as he did.

Celestia sighs again as she comes to this understanding. She’s being hasty about this and she knows it. She and Luna had ruled just fine without their father after Discord fell, and Celestia continued to rule even then after her sister was banished. Equestria has done just fine without a king.

...But still, it wouldn’t be that bad, would it?

Celestias thoughts then move to Joseph himself. He is a good soul, that she is sure of. He is already so strong, and the power he wields is a little intoxicating.

What? Celestia shook her head clear of that last thought. Why would power be intoxicating to her? She is Princess Celestia, benevolent ruler of Equestria. The corrupting temptation of power should have no sway upon her. That is how father had raised her.

Father... Joseph reminds her so much of him. He reflects the same strength and kind spirit she had looked up to so long ago. Not that he’s all that bad to look at either. A smile unknowingly spreads on Celestia’s muzzle as she thinks about Jacob in another light, and a small blush soon follows. She recalls their time in the library, when Jacob was petting (as he called it) the young pegasus, Fluttershy. The absolute bliss upon that pegasus’ face was enough to make Celestia slightly envious. She can not really remember if Father ever did that to her, Celestia was so young at the time. She wouldn’t mind trying it to find out.

Then another thought came to her. A very startling thought.

Was she falling for Joseph?

Celestias thoughts are stopped there, though, as the door to her study suddenly opens.

“And this is the royal study. Here my sister and I spend time to relax and look ov- Oh! Sister, I did not realize you were here.”

Celestia looks up from her laying position amongst some cushions to see her sister, Luna, and Lord Joseph. Celestia is startled to find that she is starting to feel rather hot while being in the same room as the human. Celestia cannot help but feel self conscious now. Is her current position on the cushions too revealing? Is her main alright? Is her horn polished? Is her- Celestia manages to bring herself to stop the barrage of stupid questions. She is a Princess. It just would not do to lose one’s composure in one’s own study.

“Sorry if we barged in on anything important,” Lord Joseph speaks up.

“No,” Celestia says while managing to keep her voice from cracking, “nothing at all. In fact, I just sent the last notice out.”

“Good,” Luna says. Then she takes on a very solemn look before continuing. “Sister, we must discuss about Lord Jacob becoming king.”

Celestia becomes curious at this as she responds, “What is the matter. I thought you were completely for Lord Jacob becoming king.”

“I am, but...”

“I’m not,” Lord Joseph speaks up.

“You aren’t?” Celestia says with surprise evident in her voice.

“Do I look like a guy that can run a country?” Lord Joseph responds while gesturing to himself.

Celestia bit back the urge to blurt ‘yes’ as she recalled what she herself had contemplated only mere minutes ago.

“(Sigh) No, I suppose not,” Celestia says while looking away.

“Sister?” Luna blurts out.

“I thought over what we had originally spoke of, and I have come to the conclusion that we were too hasty in our decision.”

“Thank you,” Lord Joseph blurts out while throwing his hands above him.

Celestia finds herself humored by this action, while Luna seems more confused by it.

Only too late did Celestia realize that both her and her sister were staring at him.

“Uh, sorry,” Lord Joseph says sheepishly, “I just really hate politics.”

Celestia giggles at this before commenting, “Don’t we all?”

“Anyway,” Luna speaks up, “While we can now all agree that kingship is not for Lord Joseph, the lord and I have come up with a different proposition.”

“Oh,” Celestia says, her interest piqued.

“While Lord Joseph does not do well with politics, he has suggested that he could take up the mantle of becoming Equestria’s guardian.”

“Guardian?” Celestia responds, both confused and curious.

“Yea,” Lord Joseph speaks next, “You know, the guy you go to if the country is in dire peril, or something like that.”

“Hmm...” Celestia hums as she thinks this over. “You would take it upon yourself to defend an entire country? Is that not just as large of a responsibility as being king?”

“Um, yeeeaaa... I guess so,” Lord Joseph responds while scratching the back of his head, “but at least I wouldn’t have to deal with politics. You just point me to ponies that need savin’ and I’ll save ‘em.”

Celestia mulls over this a little more before saying, “I like it. We shall do that, then.”

“Cool,” Lord Joseph responds.

“But we will need an official title for the position,” Luna speaks up, “Any ideas?”

“I think Guardian of Equestria will do just fine,” Celestia answers.

“Lord Joseph, Guardian of Equestria,” Luna tries out the new title, “I like it. It has a certain ring to it. What do you think, my lord?”

“Sounds good to me.”

“Then it’s settled,” Celestia says, “You shall be proclaimed as Lord Joseph Conrad, Guardian of Equestria. I will need to prepare the proper words for the announcement.”

“Very well then, we shall leave you in peace, sister,” Luna responds, “Come, my lord, there is still much of the castle that needs seeing.”

“Yea, sure,” Lord Joseph says before following Luna out of the study.

The moment the door to the study closes, Celestia lets out a sigh of relief. Throughout that entire exchange she had been trying to keep her blush down. Thousands of years of political experience helped in that regard, but she was nearly at her limit by the time they had left. Celestia put a hoof to her chest and could feel her heart still beating rapidly from the experience. Celestia is confused by this. After living thousands of years she now finds herself acting like a love struck filly, and it is only because of those thousands of years that she is able to hide it effectively.

She now had an undeniable answer to her earlier question that she herself did not entirely wish to admit.

She was falling for Joseph.


Meanwhile, somewhere far away from the security of the capital, something wicked this way comes.

Deep within the underground of the pony city of Staliongrad, lies dark and dangerous sewer pathways, used only by the toughest and the lowliest of scum that Equestria has to offer. Within these tunnels, lies a room, heavily barred and heavily hidden. Within this room, now stand six ponies, all dressed in long, black cloaks as to conceal their entire bodies. The six cloaked ponies stand in a circle, surrounding a large eldritch circle lined by many runes etched into the floor. Tall, brass tridents line the room with lit candles impaled upon their spikes. Laying in the middle of the eldritch circle lie the bodies of three ponies: an earth pony mare, a pegasus mare, and a unicorn mare. The three ponies lay unmoving, unbreathing, and perfectly preserved from the moment they died by magic.

One of the cloaked ponies speaks.

“Is all prepared for the ritual?”

Another answers.

“Yes, prophet.”

The first speaks again.

“Then let us begin. The Nightmare grows impatient, and is eager to walk amongst us once more. Remember, my brothers and sisters, that we must be vigilant in our incantations, for the ritual will only come to completion come nightfall. Only then will our faith be rewarded.”

The rest answers in unison.

“Yes prophet. Glory to the night.”

The profit responds.

“Glory to the night.”

And so they began. No one else knows what these six ponies do, nor if they heard would they understand the strange words that escape the six cloaked ponies’ lips.

Save for one. One fell spirit that had guided these six for the past year. That same spirit that hungers for revenge against both her other, and her other’s sister.

‘Soon,’ Nightmare Moon hungrily thought, ‘My night will finally fall upon those insolent ponies. They will love my night, soon enough.’