Recounting the events that led to my current seating arrangement had taken far longer than anticipated.
By the time I had arrived by Luna’s request, the moon had just risen signaling the time was no later than 6 after noon. The clock I had used in my past visits was no longer hanging on the wall, and with its removal meant my only way of measuring time. The large balcony windows did nothing to ease this handicap in any real capacity than tell me I’m very late for dinner.
A rapping sound snapped me out of this reflection, drawing my attention back to my employer and current keeper. She had long ceased documenting my nefarious deeds and shameful secrets around the evening of Shining Armor’s and my graduation from the guard. Mostly likely to conserve the writing supplies for my present infractions.
Even with my deception, her highness was still merciful. Luna’s magic had given up its stranglehold over my neck allowing me substantial more freedom than before, but I was forced to remain seated in my changeling form.
A natural form I have increasing feeling uneasy and uncomfortable remaining in even while sleeping. On one occasion I’d woken up to find not only had I stayed a pony, but unconsciously went through the effort recreating spots of matted fur and entangled strands of mane to add to the illusion of a ‘morning’ pony.
In short, while thankful for the freedom I felt exposed sitting here while Luna scrutinized me with everything but a magnifying glass. All of this while ‘encouraging’ me to speed my tale up.
So, I jumped to a time during my second year in Canterlot, when Shining Armor and I had to detain a rogue cat terrorizing a local neighborhood’s potted plants. This proved to be insufficient enough of a jump, and her highness vocalized her displeasure.
“ENOUGH!” Luna slammed both hooves onto the table, and to my amazement it resisted the assault with a quality that could only be purchased for a vast price.
“The table exceeds all expectations, your highness.”
“Tis not about the nice table!” I felt magic tighten around my neck for the first time in twenty minutes. ”Expedite thy story-considerably!”
I nodded quickly, and decided to continue revealing my history at a much later date. I ran over many dates and memories trying to determine what would meet the princess’ orders…
“Topaz had fallen ill…”
“Enough of th…”
“... Shining Armor and Cady came by to visit...”
Her hooves hit the table once more with enough force to cause a small crack to run along the edge. The damage looked very minor but once she removed her hooves did the full extent become known; the crack actually grew as the abuse from earlier took effect, splintering off like fractured glass until finally dying out once it reached the carved moon in the center.
“Tell us of the invasion!”
“It happened!”
“Imbecile! We were there!”
“As was I!”
“Ah ha! Progress.”
Her magic suddenly gave away and I was granted the gift of air once more.
I chose to remain silent lease I spur further aggression from her highness, but as I watched the more I noticed something had taken hold over her. The anger was still there but no longer as vibrant, having taken a back seat to the newest sensation to grace the two of us this early night- excitement.
“We told thee no secrets would be kept from us…”
Luna’s magic graced us once more to my trepidation, but to my good fortune only to cast a spell on the parchment from earlier. I watched and listened with trepidation as the magic hummed with irregular infrequencies that made my nerves twitch; the magic hummed with the consistency of a flickering candle, never steady as it crackled and popped with a hidden power that could consume me if it so wished.
“Now…” my ears pricked up at the word, happy to hear something besides the hum of magic in use. I still held my tongue.
“We shall attempt this once more, and this time don’t tempt my patience. What is your mission?”
“To live another day.” I blurted out before I even knew I had said anything.
This earned another ‘reminder’ to keep my mouth shut by reintroducing me to table. I didn’t even try fighting it anymore- my neck and muzzle just hurt too much.
“I mean it! Cease this pointless discourse and answer the questions presented.” Her highness eased up once more and as before I righted myself trying to maintain a semblance of posture.
Luna paid it no heed and launched into another question.
“You have one more chance monster. One more chance before I break everything your body has to offer before dragging you before my sister. Do you understand?”
I nodded, wincing from the pain but managed not to voice my displeasure. Her highness stared me down looking for any further signs of disobedience before pointing a hoof at me.
“You were present for the invasion, were you not?” I nodded, but quickly spoke as I felt the sharp rise in her hatred.
“Yes.”
“What was thee purpose?”
“I was performing my assigned duties, ranging in various states of import…”
“Infiltration of the Guard.” Luna declared as she wrote it down on the parchment. I wanted to correct her highness, to finished my explanation of said duties but sank my fangs into my bottom lip to prevent that. No way did I desire to leave this plane of existence for testing an alicorn’s patience.
The scratching of quill on parchment ceased, telling me it was time to resume this “questioning”.
She would ask and I would answer, but not all were to her liking and often than not I found myself talking to the table. How the damaged table continually withheld against my aching head only stood as a testament to its craftsponyship and likely high price.
She grew increasingly frustrated to the point my head was firmly attached to the table with a gradual increasing pressure to keep me from moving. Luna’s line of questioning became less thought out and more jumbled as she went from ask for detailed accounts of my ‘fellow accomplices’ to what route I took to enter and exit the castle.
To what purpose this lead to, only Luna seemed to know and from the feelings radiating around her only reinforced there were no structure behind them anymore.
“You’re not telling me everything.” the magic slid across my neck, forcing me up so she could look me firmly in the eyes.“I can smell it...the fear...the secrets.”
She watched me in a manner akin to a hungry timber wolf, waiting for the first sign of weakness- in this situation, waiting for me to trot over her established boundaries. To avoid such an incident limited my movement to nothing but the calculated conditioning of a guard in drill or how a hive drone conducted themselves on a daily basis.
“Se..crets?” As other ponies, I had experiences and knowledge no pony but myself should be privy to. Two noticeable events came to mind, but I quickly pushed them back to avoid setting off my ‘excitable’ liege looking for that weakness. “Oh order.”
Her highness’ expression shifted once more, the corners of her mouth pulled back as her lips parted, revealing fangs I knew weren’t natural for a pony.
“Yes. Secrets.” her voice verberated with a sinister intent as dark wisps of magic (shadows maybe) casually flailed around the length of her horn.
I didn’t even attempt to maintain my posture, and promptly tried to flee. Attempted. Her magic had anticipated my fearful retreat and raced out with a speed I thought only Twilight’s friend was capable of, and quickly latched onto my neck followed by another two grabbing my right foreleg and rear left leg leaving me immobile.
Trying to run and even flying away yielded nothing but increased pain as the phantom magic guided me back to the frightening echo of the princess I knew. I fought as best I could but the damage from earlier was already done, and in the end I found myself back on the table with my head firmly held against its cracked surface.
“Hello changeling...welcome back.” I tried yelling, not to alert my companions stationed outside these very doors, but for my own sake. I felt fear...shame for my unfiltered display and what it meant for the image of the Guard, but right now I don't care.
I struggled before Luna’s magic clamped over my muzzle.
I had to watch as she lumbered around the table keeping in my line of sight until I could only hear her misplaced hoofsteps and feel the phantom touch of air running along my back and wings.
“You can’t hide them forever.” Luna whispered into my ear, making me flinch from the chill her words produced.
The next thing I knew…I can’t recall the exact feeling, but what I could recall was how invasive it had been.
My fin kept contracting/decontracting in an endless struggle of wanting to display itself and remain retracted as cold spots the size of needles points prodded my head. My voice having ceased so I could fight for air, but my lungs wouldn’t open as the cold spots finally settled along my next and back of my head.
My memories began stirring like pages of a book being repeatedly flipped back and forth with no true reason than to make noise. Yet, with each flip I found myself reliving these moments for a second time: the rough sandstone under my hooves as I worked it from the wall, to the fear of wondering the sands alone to as recent as joining my fellow guards on another training exercise to Manehatten.
Everything came back- the sights, sounds, feelings, and taste. What everypony had said, what they tasted like, their movements, their quirks, and the happenings in between that left me questioning myself further. I wasn’t pony. I knew that, but if I’m living as a pony, than shouldn’t I be acting like a pony?
It's the never ending tunnel condition, or the fear of it never ending leaving one trapped in an endless loop. My only problem was I had dug the tunnel myself.
My (abit horrifying) fascination with it had doomed me just like the queen had predicted all those years ago, leading me to my current predicament. In between the unorganized exploration of my mind, I knew what Luna searched for and a part of me was actively challenging her. Nothing too direct but enough to keep shifting my memories around so that they would lead her further into other matters than one secret I held.
A good plan by normal standards but her highness specializes in the field of the dream and mind, so for me to have any chance at directing her efforts elsewhere than I would have needed many years of study before I could implement the theory into practice.
I had none of these schooling save for a book on dream meanings under my non existent guard belt. So her highness was left virtually unopposed.
Luna searched my memories with sinister purpose, but didn’t know what to look for and I used that to my advantage. She browsed my mind looking for information of the attack, and decided to focus my thoughts of time in the hive.
My hope was these assorted memories of me digging tunnels would keep her distracted long enough to figure something out.
“Where is it?” Luna screeched has the memories suddenly began moving too fast for me to keep track of, blurring together almost entirely.
Suddenly I was in the Everfree. Shining Armor, Cadance and other poines I’ve met were hitting trees with their bare hooves until they exploded into smaller pieces before moving to another tree. Their voices weren’t their own, replaced by the low humming drones of my class used to communicate. Than I was in a city of sorts, the name escapes me but I was walking on the central road in my first form I ever used. The robes concealing me from the eyes that started appearing from the walkways, these changelings fluttering their wings and displaying their head fins in disapproval.
I started running.
Luna’s laughter echoed around me like a fall breeze, I tried to pull the robes closer but my changeling hoof only found my standard guard armor in its place. I stopped to take in my new appearance when I noticed the street had turned into a familiar white marble…
I turned around and found Luna’s door blocking my path. I took a step forward and the doors opened, revealing not my princess’s room but the streets of Canterlot.
The streets were cloaked in night, but the street vendors were still open selling their wares as if it were daylight. I walked the streets, making an effort not to bump into any pony using the streets. Where I stumbled upon.. I don’t know.
It was a stray thought that crossed my mind until it became more. Two voices I had hoped to never hear again…
“...Is there...displeasure… with our products?” I blinked and there they were, the con-artist brothers, once again questioning my accusations.
When I confronted them, I nearly gave in to the emotions I fought so hard to control, but now, in my broken state I did no such thing.
“YES!” I lunged toward the hairless lipped one known as Flim. I don’t know what I expected to have accomplished, but once I went through him and landed on the street again was when I gave up.
The Stars were out now, but as I watched them, entire sections of the sky flickered like a bad bulb before disappearing. Ponies around me oohed and awwed as they wound these boxes up to project more stars into the sky, watching as it flickered once and with a load pop, break the box.
As I watched the world began to fade, cracks in the sky formed and entire chunks splintered off to reveal the nothingness of the beyond underneath. The laughter and sounds dimmed until only a single voice was left, the sour taste of sadness graced my tongue as it spoke a wordless exchange.
I watched the world fall apart, one word tickled my ear and the than world ceased.
“Idol.”
The dream fell apart.
Mimicking a mirror shattering, the sky was the first to lose its structure followed by the ‘ponies’ just disappearing. I took but two steps before my hoof broke through the stone into the open space that filled the empty space of this dream.
As I fell through the stone road was I able to pull myself out of the crumbling mess of my mind, separating the two realities of the past and present.
Comparable to a newly hatched nymph, I struggled to gain control of my severely hampered senses into working condition. My hearing could only detect the muffled frequencies of a pony talking and a dull ping repeating every other second.
I attempted to sit up, but immediately gave up when my wings tried fluttering in response. Moving my right forehoof only caused my left ear to twitch while trying to move my left forehoof caused my eyelids to blink.
To my surprise, the light prodding of magic graced my body before washing over me like a cold shower my some of guards love taking. With my senses returning to workable functionality(as defined by the Royal Guard Codebook) I began registering the feeling in the room; permeated in a sour mixture of anger, pain and fear, but there were two distinct tastes which didn’t make sense.
With Luna and myself as the only two occupants in her chambers, it left the source of these emotions to the only pony that could produce them. I all but faltered at the sight.
Luna’s mane had lost the remainder of its magic to the point it no longer even waved as Celestia’s mane. The hate that clouded her eyes gradually cleared by the turquoise orbs I’d known for the past several months, floating to the surface the longer I stared.
“You told us…”
“What’s causing this fear?” I asked myself as I watched this rash reversal from nightmare to the timid mare that graced our lives some months back. I took that first step and addressed her.
“...ig..hness?” I managed to whisper, my voice coming back from that assault. I half expected retaliation of sorts but all that came was a soothing touch around my hoof.
“Yo..you are our knight…” the magic grasping my hoof squeezed a little more firmly this time “... you are Idol?”
I hesitated, and Luna noticed this right away, but never let go.
To turn away (especially now), would be a grave insult her highness and my honor as one of their servants. What I found only compounded to my early observation of a sudden reversal of her mood.
The hatred had finally dissipated, leaving behind a heavy sadness sloshing around with every blink, trying to subdue its presence. All of this physical infliction and rapid flinging of raw emotions rattled me to my very LC (Love Collection) chamber.
I couldn’t bring myself to fight her hold over my hoof.. so afraid.. so unsure oh to proceed.
Eventually, Luna released my hoof and fell onto the table. I followed suit shortly after. We said nothing having no real strength to speak or do anything besides stare at each other from our respective spots on the table.
This lasted for a full six minutes before the princess decided we must on, starting with a question I found lacking in detail.
“How Idol?” I adjusted myself so I could fully meet her eyes.
“Pa..ardon?” I had to force the word out, while trying not to think of what she had just did to me. If Luna noticed my fear, she didn’t say or acknowledged it.
She raised her left forehoof and gave rolled it once before tapping the table twice.
“How did you avoid detection for so long?”
Her question caught me off guard. That admittance alone I found conflicting giving my whole duty was to be on guard, and yet, the implication that I had subverted the enlistment left my speechless.
Did her highness believe my enlistment was planned?
Our eyes met once more as we both searched for something, I for confirmation of this implied betray while her highness looking for this revelation to be proven wrong. To be relieved of the impending guilt.
After the constant barrage of foreign emotions and unchangeling like behavior on my part, the words I needed to say failed me. Continuing a night of firsts, an urge for action was needed and I obeyed.
With no warning on my part, I used my magic don the fur I'd developed a liking to. Her highness jumping off the table and into a loose fighting stance with her glowing horn lowered at me.
“This is..how?” I asked since I really didn’t know how else to answer the question, hoping Luna would set me straight if this was appropriate.
Her magic cease flowing as her body became relax to straighten out, standing with the grace expected and demanded of her stature.
“Idol is all I’ve ever known your highness..Luna.” I don’t know why I used her name but lately oddities like that were becoming a theme of the night.
“Could you repeat that? The transformation I mean.” Luna added the moment I tilted my head at her question. Even after clarifying the request, I didn’t react right away having just gotten comfortable, but nonetheless her highness gave me a command.
Lifting myself off the table, I made sure to take a step back from the nice(but broken) table and pillow before doing what was asked of me. I hesitated before reverting back to my nat..changeling form.
She didn’t move this time, opting to just watch as I moved my wings to test their ability to function. I nodded when they gave off a high pitch ringing, a characteristic of healthy, and undamaged wings.
I raise the fin along my neck so it could sit proudly atop my head. In the hive, a lowly changeling as myself would never be allowed to display our head fin for fear of the act seen as a challenge. During my first months in Canterlot, I had avoided styling my mane for this exact reasoning, believing the more bizarre the style the higher standing one held- to this day I keep my mane at appropriate guard regulations to avoid potential conflict.
Once we were both ready, I released the magic and to my comfort, found myself looking at pony hooves again.
“Again.” Luna commanded, and I obeyed.
We kept this up for another five minutes before she asked me to stop, allowing me to remain as my pony self.
When her highness started giggling uncontrollably I felt fear for my life. It seemed the princess was done toying with me and was going to serve me my discharge papers.
“You look identical! The difference being the fur.” Her statement left me feeling exposed enough that I did a double take to see if I had forgotten anything during the constant transformations.
To my relief nothing was out of place, but it didn’t stop Luna’s laughter. I wanted to inquire about her uncontrollable joy in the hopes of possibly discovering the source, hoping I wasn’t it...
I was. Well more like I was apart of the reason for this unannounced merriment.
It turned out her highness found great amusement in my forms, seeing a resemblance between the two I couldn’t see. She tried explaining the similarities between the two(mostly about the fur) but I knew ponies had fur and changelings didn’t- it’s one of the characteristics that made the two species different.
She shook her head and plucked the mirror from the little washroom her bedroom provided, and not a little hoof mirror either mind you but the actual wall mirror.
“Look!” she nearly shoved the mirror into my face. “Change and look upon thy self.”
I did as suggested and squinted as the brightness from the green flame of my magic shifted between the forms, back and forth looking…
“I am..Idol?” she snorted at my confusion, but I noticed the smallest signs of a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth and that little display eased every muscle in my body.
The mirror quickly retreated, flipping around so her highness could gaze into its surface.
“Tis broken?” she asked while angling the wall mirror every direction she could think of searching for defects.
“I’m unaware of any potential problems your highness. Perhaps it's just me?” I suggested while looking over my ponyself again.
Luna’s insistence of me checking myself persisted strongly enough to leave me feeling uneasy. For her to strongly suggest that must mean something is wrong with my appearance to be of great concern and/or discomfort to the ponies around.
“Na..na my knight. Your aren’t the one broken.” Her highness levitated the body mirror back to its home on the washroom wall before turning to address me. “It’s the convenience of society that is fractured.”
I tried to object her statement as it was this pony society that had given me so much to thrive in this land but the look she gave me was one I was well acquainted with. Having learned of this from my time nursing her health back, I’ve become aware of several signs to distinguish her various moods.
And so I figuratively bit my tongue and waited for her to finish speaking.
Her gaze shifted from me to the notes she had written during my ‘interrogation’ and with a quick use of magic ripped a strip of parchment from the top. With this piece she brought the quill over and hastily scribed something upon it before passing it to me. I read it twice to clarify what I had just read, even seeking confirmation from Luna herself.
“It’s the least we can do for our unjustified aggression. Nothing will ever be but we hope this could be our first step toward reconciliation.”
“Your highness, there is no need for this.” I started out, but once more she silenced me with that look and a raised hoof.
“Please Idol, say no more and accept it on our insistence.Your duties will be managed appropriately so please of faith nothing will be amiss during your absence.” I reread the piece of parchment looking for a possible misswording I could use to skirt the order, but after a moment gave in.
“At your request, I will refrain from my duties for the time being.”
“It will not be forever dear Idol, just long enough to recuperate.” As her highness spoke, I noticed her ears struggling to keep from pinning back, and I wondered if the words were for my own comfort or her.
I carefully stood up, slow to give a bow because of my body’s tenderness, when Luna stood up to join me.
“Hold still dear knight.” She whispered as her horn pulsed once and than most of the hurt went away, mostly.
“You didn’t have to but I appreciate it.”
“I did Idol, and nothing will ever clear what I’ve done to you. But I fear our fellow ponies..your comrades will react in a similar manner.”
A fair concern to be, well, concerned about. I hadn’t even began imagining the repercussions of my reveal when Luna started talking again, likely sensing my realization.
“I say this from experience and with a weighted heart, Idol, promise me nopony will learn of this. Not even my sister.”
“Your Highness!”
“You mustn’t! My own anger at not helping guided my hoof tonight, and what of the ponies that experienced it in the flesh?”
Her reasoning sound, and unable to suggest a better alternative once more nodded my agreement. Before and after Cady and Shining’s wedding, I had no intention of revealing myself to anypony for the simple reasons of the orders placed upon me, and it served no meaningful purpose.
Now I had even more reason not to, and the added worry what could happen if Nymph became too careless.
“Promise me Knight Idol. For your wellbeing more than my sanity.” I let the magic flame eat away at the image I knew as Idol so only the nameless changeling remained. This time her highness didn’t even flinch.
“I, Idol Hooves, swear an oath to reveal myself to no pony but her highness, Princess Luna.” I don’t know if that was the promise she wanted, but my own dealings with Luna hinted at a proclamation in this manner would give the words more worth.
“Under the lights of our domain, witnessed by the moon and stars do we, Princess of the night and Equestria, Luna, accept thy declaration.”
I gripped the slip of parchment Luna had scribed for me as I left her chambers for the night. Flipping it over revealed the remnants of her ‘session’ in the form of incomplete notes of my first year in Canterlot from what I could decipher under the blotches of ink.
My fellow guards would find a similar written slip on their desk tomorrow, giving me permission to postpone my duties for the rest of the week and the weekend. All approved and taken care off without any need to alert Princess Celestia or other command structures to this sudden change.
I tried. I really did try to change Luna’s mind on this matter but on her own admission (and reaction) figured they weren’t ready to for my reveal. Unable to offer any sort of counterargument, I accepted this reality and made my promise to Luna she would be the only pony privy to this knowledge.
Outside of Topaz and Nymph of course.
Returning the slip of parchment to the pouch I kept under my armor, I tried to focus on the task at hoof. During these late hours the roads were nearly emptied meaning the time needed to reach home would nearly be halved, but my injuries negated this advantage.
My trek back was made all the more difficult by Luna’s moon, my eyesight still unable to filter out the light at the current moment. I had to pause many times to allow my eyes enough time to adjust and even than still struggled to fully see the path around me. To offset my temporary handicap, I resorted using the changeling method of using pheromones to guide me.
One of my first culture shocks was learning ponies couldn’t produce enough pheromones to use as a means of identification and trail marking.
This is the same trail I used to lead exiles to Topaz’s home to trade their crystals when I was unavabilie, provided they displayed no ill intent. This method had proved not only practical but useful over the years but now I questioned if it was just a fluke of fortune given Topaz’s recount of the starved changeling she had encountered. This raised many concerns for I’ve never met the individual described leaving me to conclude someling broke protocol and informed the changeling themselves..
“I’ll have to remove the trails once I’m feeling better…”
Out from under the moonlight and into the comforting darkness of my abode, I relieved myself of my helmet by carelessly dropping it onto the floor. I ignored the protective head piece on the floor and moved to the kitchen in search of substance, the kind that didn’t involve insects or my favorite, aged Hydra.
Flickers of moonlight shined through the blinds, this time providing me enough light not to hinder my sight as I walked to the fridge. A note was fastened to the door with a magnet and with the ink reflecting the moonlight off it, I could make out the message Topaz had left me detailing Nymph will be spending the night at a friend’s home.
I really need to sit Nymph down and explain the potential dangers of working too much.
With the note read, I opened the fridge door to browse its contents and to my underwhelming excitement discovered little in comfort food for po..changelings. Deciding to partake in eating later, I closed the door and dragged myself back into the main room where I settled on sitting down.
The couch groaned under the weight of my armor but held the weight with little protest after that, leaving me in the dark with the echoes of a lifetime stampeding in my head. I still ached but it didn’t bother me as it should.
Recounting my entire life to Luna had left me frizzled with questions and a mixture of feelings I just wanted gone. The years have swiftly passed me by as I followed the daily regiment of the Guard and living daily life as a pony, that I had barely paid any attention to matters outside my realm of existence- the questioning left me unsettled.
Just what had I missed?
Some memories came to mind and as I reviewed these in a fresh light I finally understood some of the subtle gestures and mannerisms I had missed. So many I could write a book on pony behaviorism from my own experiences like water being poured into a glass. Nymph had developed more into a changeling unlike any other I knew from the hive or have met in exile, an unnatural union of pony and changeling customs I myself might find intriguing.
“Idol? Is that you?”
Topaz’s voice surprised me more than it should have and I have found its intrusion into the night a bit of a shock.
“Yes.” I answered, trying to hide the soreness of my ‘chat’ with Luna.
Her hoof steps clicked and clacked up behind me and before leaning her head over the couch. I moved over to rest my muzzle in the crook of her neck. Her muscles contracted as the whiff of worry caressed my senses before she pulled back to study me, the darkness making it difficult for the non changeling.
“Spill it.”
“I try not to.” Her hoof found my shoulder and this time I couldn’t mask the pain, she recoiled and I felt her worry wash over my shame.
“What happened!” Her voice was louder now since Nymph wasn’t here, and with the stillness of night it only echoed.
Topaz backed away from the couch and went into the kitchen, only to return less than a minute later with a warmly glow guiding her. I blinked trying to adjust to the candle being placed on the little table in front of us asTopaz found a spot next to me- her hooves softly checking my upper body for discomfort.
She found it, and immediately unleashed a torrent of questions and worried statements trying to uncover the cause of my injuries. Following the written and real advice of my pony peers, I silenced her near rambling with another nuzzle.
“Luna found out about my past, and didn’t like the prospect of being kept in the dark.”
“She did this?” She asked with the quietness of a butterfly, but her worry for my health is appreciated. I reverted back, startling Topaz but she quickly returned to inspect my upper carapace.
“It’s still sore…”
“Idol, its cracked.”
“I would be surprised if it weren’t.” Topaz’s hoof guided my head to the right so we could see eye to eye. She was tired and hiding it, well I might add, but her concern was enough to keep her awake. I knew she wanted to know, but didn’t ask for one reason or another. So, I saved her the trouble by recounting everything that led to the reveal.
Topaz was not only a good lecturer but a good listener as well. Throughout my recounting of today, she held any and all questions until the end even as my evening with Luna became too much for her to imagine. By the end of my recap, Topaz had moved closer but made no effort to further examine my bruises out of fear of further agitating the hidden wounds.
Instead, she unfolded her left wing to drape it limply over my withers. I accepted the act of kindness greedily but caught myself and returned the favor by wrapping my hoof around her and dragging her closer.The pain came and went but I could feel her muscles relaxing, and her breathing had slowed about 30% to an acceptable range for a tired mare.
“What now?”
“I’m to continue my duties as normal only now with the addition of a weekly visit with Luna.” Topaz shifted in my grasp while mumbling what I assumed was a ‘how come?’
I waited until she settled down before answering her question by giving the reason Luna gave me. The promise I made to Luna had more sway over my agreement to these future meetings but didn’t feel it was important enough to mention that.
“Topaz?” I asked when she never responded.
The reason became apparent when I looked down and find the tired mare had given in, having fallen asleep on my side. The additional weight didn’t bother me too much, but now I was more concerned with not waking her up than continuing my tale.
“Good night Topaz.” I whispered in her ear before sitting back up, holding her a little firmer this time.
Her wing returned the favor and we both slept comfortably that night.
Oh neat. I wonder if this will lead to trouble when Idol realizes he's promised Luna not to tell Celestia, even if directly asked.
"I used my magic to don my fur" or "I, using my magic, donned my fur"
"accept thy declaration" (thou is a subject pronoun like I, He, or They)
"and I found its intrusion into the night a bit of a shock."
"to rest my (muzzle/chin/snout) in the crook of her neck."
"over my withers."
"by wrapping my hoof around her and dragging her closer."
There's a bunch of missing commas, too, but I can't really be bothered to point them all out.
10011217
I appreciate the comment sir and the quick proof read. As for the commas, I believe I know which ones you're referring to and wont justify why I skipped them, but if need I'll go back to add them.
But ignoring that mess for the moment, would be willing to share what you liked and disliked about the chapter? Any thoughts/predictions for the final part?
Oof. Luna may be needing some therapy herself now that she knows she just physically and mentally brutalized her closest/basically only friend. She better do more to make it up to him then giving him a week vacation or imma be pissed.
On the upshot? Luna's invasive digging means she's aware of Nymph, and knows that Topaz knows.
Honestly, though? Luna should tell Celestia, Cadence, and Shining Armor the truth - that Idol is a Changeling who has been fully loyal to Equestria, and an enemy of the hive that attacked it, for around a decade. Further, that when the invasion happened he actively fought to defend Equestria against his former people.
Seriously. Celestia didn't blame Scorpan, and he was the brother of Tirek! If Luna's invasive mental probing showed his only relation to the invasion was fighting it off, then there's no basis for her to be mad at the guard who is a living legend.
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Feel like eventually he will be revealed and luna will be his biggest defender and will probably confess in tormenting her closest friend even if she didn't mean to. Also the changeling hive should eventually collapse from the tyrant rule of Chrysalis and idol would be looked at for how to go forward in the future as a stepping stone. Or buck even nymph as she is being raised as a blend of pony and changeling characteristics.
Yay, another chapter! I loved how idol reminded a guard even during the integration and just wanted to please. The change of Luna's mind was a bit dry for me, but the laughing at his almost identical forms was amazing.
One sad thing about this chapter is that it looks like a nice ending to the story, but I'm happy that the tag still says incomplete :) i hope to read more about idols weekly sessions with Luna.
Thank you for writing
It can be said the best disguise is none at all, and Luna realizes the irony in a changeling disguise that looks just like a changeling.
You know, when folks say they saw their life flash before their eyes it's usually not literally. We'll be lucky this doesn't trigger a late-life crisis!
Nymph will be the Canterlot Hive Queen eventually, she just doesn't know it yet.
Keep going! ;)
a amazing chapter.
so Luna kind of understands now.
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She'll do more for Idol as time passes, but the guilt will never fully go away. Sadly the final chapter (part 3) won't explore this, but in part 2 its stated/implied the week off is just the start of repaying him.
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Part 3 won't show this but Luna making Idol promise isn't permanent. With tensions still very high, she fears his reveal might further upset not only the populace, but ruin their trust in the guard and the princesses's ability to protect them.
Not only did the changelings infiltration of the wedding nearly succeed, but to find one of their own had done it for a decade would be catastrophic.
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Not saying Nymph will lead a hive, but I will say I'm trying to imply her upbringing will play a big role in the future.
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Luna's sudden change of mind was a hard part for me to write, but i felt once she realized he was privy to knowledge only Idol (and her) would know it would be enough. Not my strongest scene given it happens at the snap of the fingers, but works enough.
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And that part was inspired by a chat I had with Vdrake where he pointed that out. I ask him(which he happily agrees) to read the chapters before they're published to make sure I didn't unintentionally step on his hooves.
I will say Nymph will make another appearance in the final part.
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lol, you commented while I was replying. XD
But yep, I wont further elaborate on this in part 3, but wanted to hint things will be alright in the future.
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I liked how Luna interrogated him, using relatively mundane methods before finally giving up and probing his mind directly. Also, her insistence on thoroughly studying him once she realized that she had a very loyal Idol to obey her commands and let her stare. Topaz's concern was also very nice.
The various grammatical errors keep taking me out of the story a little, even those which remain. Additionally, I'm rather confused as to what Luna is pointing out when she tries to get Idol to see something in the mirror. Further, the characters talk and act in ways that look more like them being moved along by the plot rather than doing anything for their own reason. It's kind of unnaturally paced, with some scenes lingering but many skipping quickly through, with characters changing emotion rapidly - for example, Luna is VERY fast to go from "this horrible monster has been a spy for HOW LONG?!" to "oh I will tend to dear Idol's wounds, all traces of doubt gone from my mind."
In short, the "big picture" of the story is done well, but the smaller bits are a bit wonky.
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My intention with Luna's brash flip in personality was to show she realized her mistake. Think of an argument where you say something in anger, but once you do, know you messed up. Something similar with Luna.
As for the mirror, it was her trying to get Idol to see his pony form and changeling form were near identical but with fur.
For the character interactions, thank you for pointing that out. I'm not defending myself, but the very few people that read the chapter before it published never mentioned that. Its a concern I never considered before until now.
My plan right now will be to finish part 3, and find an editor that's willing to help edit the story once its finished. Than, focus on my original fanfics before (possible) coming back to 'fix' issues as you mentioned in your comment.
Once again, your insight is appreciated, and I'm happy to hear despite my shortcomings , enjoyed the story enough to comment. Happy New Year, sir!
Weeew
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Honestly? I'm half expecting Cadence to say something like "Yeah, Idol's a changeling. Well, I mean, I didn't know what he actually was until the wedding, but, like, he IS a love-aligned emotivore? I knew the first time I met him, and I'd kinda be an awful Princess of Love if couldn't tell after having dinner double-date with him. ... Wait, you think it's strange it doesn't bother me? Well, he's an intelligent being, and it's not like he can control his diet. Plus, when I met him he had been Shiny's best friend for a long time and he was doing his best to be helpful. And when you really think about it, doesn't somebeing who eats love have a good reason to make sure there's as much love around as possible?
Actually, could we pencil in some time to sit down with Idol later? Chrysalis seems awful, and it's worth considering if everybeing wouldn't be better off if we ousted her and I adopted all the other Changelings."
And/or Celestia saying "Oh! I'm sorry, Luna! It slipped my mind and I never thought to tell you! Yes, I knew. When he arrived he didn't have the faintest idea how to be a Pony. Of course you wouldn't have known about that, since he has learned so much in the past decade. He has the worst disguise I've ever seen, but since I allowed him to serve you must have thought it was a coincidence. *sigh* I've royally fouled this one up, haven't I?"
Topaz: "THANK FAUST! The secret's out! Now I don't have to worry about fixing his constant slip-ups to keep him from outing himself, and my ulcer can start healing!"
Shining Armor: "Cadence told me. Also, he's probably the best guard in history. He's definitely the most dedicated. And he's saved my life multiple times. So... It kinda doesn't matter to me?"
Twilight: "Wait, Topaz knew? *gasp* A Doctor of Entomology has secretly been studying what had long been considered nothing more than cryptozoological nonsense?!?!? I need to visit her right away! SO MANY TESTS TO DO!"
Pinkie: "Pfft, obviously! I mean, what Pony would have 'rotting meat' as their favorite flavor of cake?"
Idol: "I am aware, yes. ... Princess Luna, if you wish to double facehoof might I suggest rearing back first? If I wasn't here you may have been injured by the ground. ... It does not matter if my injury was worsened by having protected you from a scuffed knee or bumped head, it is an honor. ... Princess Luna, I'm not sure if a quadruple facehoof is physically possible or not, but perhaps you should leave it in the realm of the theoretical?"
Chrysalis: "What? Bwa-HOW DID YOU GET HERE?!?!?"
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Re: Luna's change of heart:
My reading was that she started out assuming he was an impostor, but by the time she discovered he was real her feeling of betrayal and the torment she inflicted on him lead to her falling for the sunk cost fallacy, and she convinced herself the secret she knew he was hiding was something dire. Then she was simply doubling down in a panic in the hopes that the secret would bring absolution. Then she found out the dark secret he refused to let her see was... him defying his oath as a guard to go behind her back to defend her honor.
And that broke her.
That, I feel, is far more powerful than simply her finding memories only the real Idol would have.
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That's a very accurate recap of Luna in this chapter! The memories are the catalysis for her understanding how huge of a mistake had been made. The oath was not only for fear of what other ponies would think, but as a way to buy her time to figure her next move.
The last chapter feels super rushed...