"Ugh!" Twilight groaned out for the fifth time as she and Spike made their way into the Castle of the Pony Sisters. "This has been the worst day..."
"Aw come on, Twi," Spike offered comfortingly. "It can't have been that bad-"
"I spent the entire morning being badgered by my Mom about grandfoals!" Twilight snapped angrily. "And all the time, Celestia was sitting there giggling at my misery! I think I've earned a good old fashioned 'worst day' gripe."
"Well, you had to expect that," Spike pointed out logically as they crossed the bridge. While he'd been nervous initially about wildlife or magical beings within the castle once they got there, seeing the arsenal Twilight had loaded herself down with before leaving left him completely at ease. "It's kind of what parents do once their kids have special someponies...or so I've heard. I mean, Vendra's...your daughter. Don't you bug her about that?"
"She's together with my Dad," Twilight pointed out bluntly. "Kinda hard to figure out proper nomenclature for bugging her for grandsiblings. ...huh, Pinkie's right. That term works surprisingly well. But anyway, it isn't the demands for grandfoals that bothers me. You're right that I expected that."
Spike blinked. "Okay...then what was bugging you?"
"She was constantly giving me suggestions on how to go about making it possible biologically!" Twilight snapped angrily. "I mean, she was going on about using time travel to find a point where Nefarious was masturbating back before he became a robot and collecting the semen and using magic to modify it to be genetically compatible! Even going on about making an 'injection system' for it!(1)"
Spike blushed brightly. "Okay...I can see why that would be a bit embarrassing-"
"I know!" Twilight snarled, kicking a rock out of her path. "I mean, I apparently get my brain from her and Dad, so how can she know so little about what she's talking about? The systems are already in place, for goodness sake!"
"Uh...what?" Spike asked nervously, uncertain he wanted the answers.
"That 'injection system' is completely unnecessary since there's already a delivery system that's presently only used for a biological lubricant," Twilight explained. "I mean, cold hard metal going in there without lubricant? Not pleasant. And we don't need to go back in time for DNA, it's already in built into the program cores of his robotic cells as part of the process that turned him into a robot in the first place! It's child's play to create a system to splice gametes from that! Heck, it's part of the base design for his penis as is!"
Spike carefully pushed any mentally scarring information from that rant out of his mind, focusing instead on the knowledge that he would not have to assist Twilight in tinkering with her boyfriend's penis as far as getting children. "And...modifying the DNA?" he asked carefully.
"Again, his systems already take that into account," Twilight continued. "Part of what happened when he inlaid his entire superstructure with magic-channeling carbuncle for his shift into a robotic alicorn stallion. While in that form, his DNA code is modified to what it would have been if he'd been born one. Switch the splicer on, and it makes alicorn stallion gametes."
"So...anytime you want, the two of you could start churning out alicorn super-babies?" Spike asked nervously.
"Which is why I haven't told Mom about those systems, and why I've told Nefarious exactly what I'll do to him if he turns that particular system on without my express permission!" Twilight stated firmly. She paused as she noticed a thoughtful look on Spike's face. "...do you think I've missed something?"
"Uh...well..." Spike rubbed the back of his head nervously. "See...I've been reading...certain things...some...Neighponese books..."
"Oh, you've discovered Hentai," Twilight stated bluntly. "Well, you're a growing young drake. Perfectly understandable you'd start mentally exploring your sexuality. Just make sure you clean up after yourself, and get to the point you're trying to make quick."
Spike exhaled a sigh of relief, glad Twilight was being so understanding. "Well...in some of them, the mares - or griffoness, or bitch, or...well, you get the idea..."
"You don't limit yourself to a single species genre," Twilight concluded. "Go on."
"Well, there are times when in the throes of passion, she'll call out to the guy to 'make her pregnant'," Spike explained. "You've...made sure to tell Nefarious that doesn't count as express permission, right?"
Twilight's eyes widened. "Thank you Spike," she offered carefully. "I'll be sure to let him know before anything else like that happens between us. But for now, I'm going to spend the rest of the day in the library of this ancient palace, reading any legible book I can find, binging on whatever snacks Aphelion can send us, and pretending the world outside that room doesn't exist. I need it."
"Far be it for me to stop a read-a-thon," Spike agreed. After all, he'd brought plenty of comic books. As long as he felt safe - and had plenty of snacks - this meant he didn't have to actually do anything.
Much later in the day, Twilight looked up from the book she was engrossed in as she heard a great deal of screaming that sounded like her friends. Sighing, she got to her hooves and walked out of the library, only momentarily noticing that Angel Bunny was stuffing his face with salad on an otherwise empty cushion.
Once out on the second floor balcony of the main hall, she saw Rainbow Dash and Applejack running around like crazy, Rarity clutching a torn tapestry, and Fluttershy standing over a crushed pile of rocks. The first two were screaming their heads off, and the second two were wailing like someone had died. Grinding her teeth, Twilight cast a spell of silence over the entire group. She then waited calmly as the total absence of the noise they were making led to her friends calming down. As they all turned to look at her, she crossed her forelegs. "So...who wants to explain?"
"Uh...Most Daring Pony contest got out of hand?" Rainbow offered nervously.
Applejack nodded in agreement. "We...kinda scared ourselves out of our wits."
Twilight rolled her eyes. "Well, if that's what you consider fun. Could you make sure someone's around to reign things in before you go crazy?"
"I think we did!" Rainbow offered cheekily with a wide grin at Twilight.
Twilight glared at Rainbow for a time, then turned to Rarity. "And you?"
"The tapestry I came to restore..." She held up the tear in the fabric. "Look at it! Oh, the tragedy-"
"You're crying because the tapestry you came to restore needs repair and restoration?" Twilight pointed out incisively.
Rarity blinked a few times. "W-well, I guess when you put it that way, it does seem rather silly, doesn't it?" she offered with a nervous titter.
Rolling her eyes, she turned to Fluttershy, who still looked heartbroken. "And you, Fluttershy?" she asked, trying to keep her voice gentle.
Fluttershy pointed to where a large rock had apparently fallen. "A-Angel...h-he's..." she whimpered, her lip quivering.
Twilight sighed. She really couldn't blame Fluttershy if she thought Angel had been killed. She could, however, blame Angel for letting it happen. Seizing the bunny in her magic, she chucked him at Fluttershy. "Now where's Pinkie? Any time four or more of us are gathered, it's all of us." Loud organ music echoed through the castle. "...oh, she's playing the organ that controls all the castle's traps. Of course she is." Rolling her eyes, Twilight went back to the library. "There aren't any traps up here if you're all willing to read quietly."
The entire group - plus Pinkie, once she got bored of music and came to read - spent the rest of the day in companionable silence, save the occasional sharing of something particularly interesting.
(1) See this comment.
... having now learned even more that I didn't want to know about a male robo-organ, I suspect a very baseline rule about turning certain systems on boils down to "not until after you put a ring on this horn" above and beyond all other permission issues.
I am so glad I didn't accompany her to my old castle!
So what events does this story go up to? End of season 4, 5, or 6?
7882762 Tirek's defeat has been the usual benchmark for ending a PWNY-verse story.
7882772 True but Twilight had to take on Starlight Glimmer in season 5 so he might put in that in the story.
7882777 No, it will be Tirek's defeat. The multi-crossover story 'My Little PWNY' will incorporate all of the Mane 6 and Spike's stories just after Tirek's death. Anything past that point will be brought up in sequel stories, assuming Tats plans on writing said stories. This was established back in For(t) Pony, and has been stated on numerous occasions throughout multiple stories.
Oh good god. So when Nefarious transforms he biologically an alicorn? You realize this means they could essentially churn out Flurry Hearts. And by that I mean "superpowered alicorn foals."
7882785 Yeah you're right I just remembered not a single one of his stories have shown events post season 4.
7882785 Spike never fought Tirek. The whole "Story-Time With Spike and Space-Mom" thing was happening in Twi's magic castle.
7882785 Another Hatchling was the exception to this, what with featuring Student Starlight in later chapters and thus, by necessity, taking place after season 5.
Soo....... now that the interesting TMI section is over.....
What happened to the magicky comic thing?........
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7883175
The Power Ponies bit was a later episode. It may yet come up.
7883147 and "On the Corner of Straight and Narrow" was ANOTHER exception as Trixie's return to Equestria was actually AFTER Tirek's defeat (as evidenced by the fact the castle was already there). Cadance's PWNY-verse story didn't even GET TO Season 4 (then again, with NINE alicorns, it stands to reason Tirek would have stood no chance whatsoever anyway). And Nightmare Moon's PWNY-verse story actually ended with DISCORD's defeat rather than Tirek's.
Hey there. Not much I can say other than, excellent job, once again, on the exchanges, emotional content, humor and future chapter set-up in all the right places. Of course, I find myself actually feeling sorry for Suri (Twilight might save the lethal stuff for Tirek-level baddies [because using that on LESSER villains would actually make her worse than them], but she is still packing weapons and tactics that could put such a good scare into Suri that she would be BEGGING for the Manehattan police to arrest her; willing to confess to anything and everything just as long as they keep "Rarity's nutcase alicorn friend" away from her). And, yeah, Diamond Tiara getting the lecture of her life for the stuff she tried to pull on Scoots AND ratted out to her parents (mostly Filthy, but it might make for a good early bird camei by Spoiled too), that would definitely be worth the price of theater admission. And the Flim-Flams getting busted before they can make their getaway and hauled off to the nearest dungeon for the next couple of decades would definitely also be priceless (yeah, the death penalty would be excessive, but a couple of decades in the dungeon would be just right).
And, as for the Cheese Sandwich thing, I said it before I'll say it again; I could definitely see Twi playing "shipper" here (though I wonder if Qwark would be the one with the jealousy issues instead of Pinkie).
Sorry about that. Got carried away. Anyway, I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.
7883711
Don't think Sony can afford the sequel for it at this point, considering the way they've been hemorrhaging money of late on their various failed attempts at movies. Sad really. I liked it, and took two non-players to it, and both of them enjoyed it as well. Sigh, it's like Sly 4, it was enjoyable, just the studios behind them make very bad decisions in marketing.
7883735 While true, Another Hatchling is STILL the only one explicitly set after season 5.
7884745
Regardless, I'd rather you not speak for me regarding things about the stories.
I actually do intend to have a Twilight/Starlight confrontation in this story.
7884760 I wasn't speaking for you. I was simply pointing out that AH was the only story thus far that went beyond season 5 due to the framing device.
Things that haven't happened yet obviously can't be factored in by a reader.
Poor Nefarious, he's going to be a nervous wreck if Twilight Velvet keeps pushing for grandfoals. I can see Shining, Nefarious, and Night Light hiding in a bar and Night Light recounting stories of what his mother and mother in law put him through.
Oh yeah, did Twilight by chance find the Inspiration Manifestation book and take it away for safe keeping????
7884760 if you have twilight and starlight go at it in a fight would dark star be released if starlight tries to steal twilights cutimark
FINALLY! I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE TO SUGGEST NEIGHPON AS OPPOSED TO JAPONY!
8494395
Japony? I think i've come across that once. Usually I find Neighpon is the more common one for a Japan or anime reference.
I think everyone should be nervous about that.
Well hey, as the recommendation goes, explain your plans to a six year old and see if they can point out any flaws.
8533826
I do, too