Peewee and Spike's Ponyville Adventures

by AbstractThought

First published

A series of skits starring everyone's favorite young phoenix and dragon.

Peewee has returned to Ponyville and reunited with his bestest buddy Spike, ending one adventure and starting countless more. Join the young phoenix and dragon as they go through life with all its ups, downs, lefts, rights, flips, flops, twists, shouts, and everything else!

Cover art by LucasPratt!

Fun with Peewee and Owlowiscious

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It was a bright and shiny day in Ponyville, one where all the birds were singing in practice for the next musical number; all, that is, except for one little bird in Golden Oaks Library. Peewee was in a singing mood as well, but sadly for him, Twilight Sparkle, newly crowned princess of the sticks-in-the-mud, didn’t want him making noise while she was working on a new decree that would make having a library card mandatory for every resident of Ponyville. He couldn’t hang out with his bestest buddy Spike, either, because he was busy spreading posters around town advocating the joys of library cards. And he couldn’t even explore outside because ever since he had accidentally melted the ice sculpture of Sapphire Shores that Rarity had made for her concert with an ill-timed fiery sneeze, Twilight didn’t trust him wandering unsupervised for some reason.

In short, Peewee was bored.

“I’m bored!” Peewee cried out, in case the narration didn’t make it obvious. “Someone unbore me!”

“Whooooo…” Peewee turned and saw Twilight’s owl, imaginatively named Owlowiscious, snoozing on his perch. Hmm, he’s someone. Maybe he can unbore me! Aww, but it’s gonna be kinda hard for someone who’s asleep to entertain me. Unless…

Suppressing the urge to giggle, he plucked out two of his loose tail feathers, flittered softly over to Owlowiscious’s perch, and stuck the tail feathers in the sleeping owl’s nostrils, giving him a classy feather mustache. Hehe, now he just needs a monocle to complete the look! The young phoenix then flew up to Twilight’s desk, grabbed a quill and dipped it in the inkwell (Twilight was too absorbed in her writing to notice), and started to draw a circle around Owlowiscious’s right eye, somewhat shakily due to his constant giggling and not being used to drawing with his beak. He had almost finished the circle when he noticed something off.

Namely, the owl’s eye being open.

“May I ask what exactly you are doing, Peewee?” Owlowiscious asked, his voice posh, intellectual, and slightly grumpy, like if Fancy Pants and Twilight’s voices had gotten married and had a baby.

Peewee froze in place, the ink from his quill silently running down the owl’s face and dripping on the floor. “Uh…making art?”

Owlowiscious gave Peewee a long stare before turning his head to a small mirror on the left, causing the ink to draw a small line as he turned and saw the art that Peewee had put all over his face. After a few seconds of strained silence, the owl eased the air with a hearty chuckle. “Oh ho ho, well played, little one!”

“Wait…you’re not mad?” Peewee asked.

“Of course not!” Owlowiscious insisted as he turned to face Peewee again. “I have a great appreciation for comedic shenanigans! I only regret that your body mass is too small to lift Spike’s top hat so you could complete the ensemble!”

Peewee giggled at the mental image of Owlowiscious with a hat and cane striking a suave pose while drinking tea. Whoa, his class is off the charts!

“As a matter of fact,” Owlowiscious continued, “I have quite the comedic repertoire under my belt.”

“Your belt?” Peewee tilted his head at the addition to the mental ensemble. “I dunno, I don’t think a belt really goes with a hat and cane.”

Owlowiscious burst into laughter at that remark. “My word, you’re simply incorrigible!” he said between laughs. “I think you’ll be quite impressed with my humorous stylings, though. Would you like to see them in action?”

“Sure, that sounds like a perfect way to get unbored!” Peewee chirped like the bird he was.

“Excellent!” Owlowiscious replied jovially. “Now go get master Twilight’s attention, and I’ll do the rest!”

Peewee did an eager salute in response and flew over to Twilight, who was now adding an addendum that the library books would magically recommend books based on the owner’s interests and Twilight’s best interests. Strategically placing himself over Twilight’s desk, he dropped the quill from his beak onto the paper in front of her, leaving a little ink splatter.

“Gah! Peewee!” Twilight screeched in alarm. “What did I tell you about messing up my work when I’m busy?!”

“That it’s funny?” Peewee said. “No wait, that’s what Spike told me.”

“Who who!” Twilight turned her attention toward Owlowiscious and stared at the fancy makeover he had received.

“Wha…did Peewee do this to you?!” Twilight demanded.

“Who?”

“Peewee!” Twilight repeated. “You know, the phoenix?”

“Who?”

“Ugh, just forget it,” Twilight said with a sigh. “I’m going to go get a washcloth. You stay there, Peewee; I’ll deal with you later.”

“Who?”

Twilight responded with an alicorn glare–the harshest of all glares, apart from that of the basilisk and the Fluttershy–and stormed off into the kitchen. As soon as she was out of earshot, Owlowiscious burst into laughter. “What did I tell you? Am I a comedic master or what?”

Peewee stared blankly. “I don’t get it.”

“It’s simple in its ingeniousness!” Owlowiscious explained. “You see, ponies can’t understand me; they only hear hoots! So whenever they address me, I simply respond with a hoot, and they think I’m asking ‘who’ rather than simply making an owl noise! It never fails!” He chortled as the brilliance of his humor swept over him once again.

“Wait…that’s it?” Peewee asked. “That’s your big comedy routine?”

“That it is, dear Peewee!” Owlowiscious confirmed.

“Uh…no offense, Owl Delicious,” Peewee said (he always got tongue-tied every time he tried saying the owl’s real name), “but that’s kinda weak.”

“What are you talking about? That routine’s good! It’s a real…hoot!” Owlowiscious lost it with that zinger and fell off his perch onto the floor with the amount of laughter that was emanating from him.

Peewee sat with a sigh on a stack of books as Twilight returned with a washcloth held in her magical grasp. Dear Princess Celestia, he wrote in his head while Twilight scrubbed the hysterical owl. Owls suck at comedy. Your faithful student, Peewee.

The End

Note: Owlowiscious would later have a son who would become the hottest comedian in Equestria.

SIDE–Cresta's Quest for a Mate–Part 1

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Cresta’s Quest for a Mate

by Abstract Thought

In a forest far from any pony settlements, yet slightly closer to them than a forest of phoenix settlements, there lived a robin. This robin started off as one of many incidental characters in a past story, but she proved popular enough for people to want more of her, and so her adventures would now get focus.

Her name…was Cresta.

She was a simple red robin with a simple dream: to start a beautiful family with a beautiful husband and make beautiful chicks by having beautiful bird sex with her beautiful bird mate. When she met Byron, she was certain that he would be the one, but sadly, things didn’t turn out quite as she had planned. Byron was certainly a nice guy, but he had one major weakness: he was so uptight! No matter how much she coaxed, seduced, or threatened to withdraw her stress-reducing back rubs, he refused to mate with her because he “didn’t think he was ready to start a family.” What a cad! Seriously, he had to be the only robin in the world with no hormones whatsoever! Cresta had wandered once or twice if she had accidentally taken all of his hormones, considering how often she had mating on the brain.

Well, after over a year of having her lady parts kept frosty, Cresta decided she didn’t have to put up with to put up with having a dead weight boyfriend, and so she started looking for some tail on the side. Thus began her quest for a mate who would be willing to have sex with her and also had a tail. Of course, it couldn’t be that easy. After her latest fruitless encounter with a brain-dead phoenix chick named Peewee, Byron discovered them and pointed out that what she was doing constituted as cheating, which was apparently a bad thing. Pfft, what right does he have getting mad at me for wanting to have sex? It’s all his fault for spurning me for so long! A lady is never to blame! Especially when she’s as sexy as I am!

So now she was all alone again with nobirdy to snuggle with or make eggs with. Of course, she wasn’t worried; she was able to charm her old beau pretty easily, so how hard could it be to find a new mate who would be happy to, well, mate? After all, the universe wouldn’t be so cruel as to deny her that satisfaction for the sake of conflict, right? Of course not! The universe is never mean to beautiful birds! It was a rule, she just knew it!

Cresta flew over to a nearby lake and checked out her reflection. “Mmm, lookin’ good, Cresta!” she said as she posed and used her wings to smooth out any feathers that looked off. “You’re the very image of seduction! Somebirdy is going to be very happy to have you by their side!” Her self-absorbed high was slightly punctured by the realization that this was the lake where she dealt with that dumb Peewee and got outed by her former mate. Screw them! Figuratively, of course, though I really wish it could have been literal. It’s a shame I can’t just start a family with myself. I certainly wouldn’t mistreat myself! Especially not with such a beautiful body…Focus, Cresta! You’ll have plenty of time to admire yourself later!

Once she was nice and clean, she took flight in search of fresh prey, which in this context referred to potential mates, not worms, even if they were delicious. Hmm, let’s see…which of you lucky birdies shall be my mate? She soon drew her gaze to a striking blue jay reclining on a branch. Target acquired!

Cresta flew over to the blue jay and gave an alluring whistle, something that got his attention pretty quickly. “Hello there, handsome!” she said in her signature sweetly flirtatious tone. “I couldn’t help but notice you sitting there all alone, and I thought somebirdy as handsome as you didn’t deserve such a horrible fate!”

“Oh, really?” the blue jay asked slyly, his head perking up in interest. “I’m guessing you’re here to remedy that for me?”

“Well shucks, honey,” she replied with faux bashfulness. “Only if you’d really like me to, of course!” She capped it off with a wink to seal the deal.

“It would be my pleasure, my lady!” the blue jay answered, eager as a meager beaver with a cleaver doing something else that rhymed.

“Okay, sweetie!” Cresta said with a beam. “You just sit tight and I’ll do all the work!” She started sashaying her way over to the excited blue jay before her. “I tell ya, it’s nice to meet a bird who knows a come-on when he sees it.”

“Really? It’s hard to believe somebirdy as lovely as you would have a hard time attracting suitors,” the blue jay responded.

“Well, not normally,” Cresta admitted as she started to line up their cloacae. “It’s just I had to deal with this phoenix chick who wouldn’t know an innuendo if it danced on his crotch with thorns on its feet! Honestly, the things I have to put up with.”

“Wait a minute,” the blue jay said, his excited demeanor grinding to a halt. “You tried to have sex with a kid?”

“Well, what can I say? He was cute!” Cresta defended. “Though maybe it was a good thing my mate interrupted us before we could do anything; I wouldn’t want my kids to not have a good brain to go with their good looks.” She closed her eyes and gave a deep sigh to release any lingering frustrations, and then she was fully in Sweetheart Mode. “But enough about the past! Let’s focus on our future…”

Her voice and sex drive trailed off as she opened her eyes and noticed that the blue jay had somehow flown the coop in the couple of seconds she hadn’t been paying attention. “Wha–what kind of flake just leaves right before a beautiful robin is about to pleasure him?!” she screeched. “I swear, birds these days have no manners!”

The aggravated robin flew off in a huff, planning to soak in the lake to cool off her heated sex drive that was so rudely denied satisfaction. Fortunately, she soon sighted another excellent outlet: a handsome sparrow who had spotted her and decided to make the first move with an alluring whistle of his own. Thank you kindly, forest! “You called?”

“You bet I did!” the sparrow said rather loudly. “I just wanted to let you know that your body was made for springtime loving!”

“Ooh, you’re quite observant, aren’t you?” Cresta replied, perching herself in front of him with a glimmer in her eye that would have blinded them both if it were any brighter. “How about we put it to good use?”

“Yes ma’am!” the sparrow shouted with enough force to cause Cresta to wince and her earholes to ring like wind chimes. I’ll be sure to straighten out that volume control problem once we’ve become intimate.

“Well then, let’s not waste any more time!” With that, the two assumed the position and made sweet, feathery love. Of course, as per the nature of bird sex, it only took a few seconds of contact between their cloacae for their intercourse to conclude, but they certainly made the most of it. Cresta could feel her stress melt away as their bodies connected. Ooh, yes! I can feel the universe groping my egg maker! My eggs shall be infused with the very essence of its ancient magic! …Wow, my brain really gets scrambled during sex, doesn’t it? Whatever, at least I finally got some!

“Whew!” Cresta cried out as she disconnected and reclined on the branch, basking in the sunlight and hormonal aftermath. “It’s been too long since I’ve have a good romp like that!”

“Yeah, and you certainly know how to romp it good, chickadee!” the sparrow screeched.

“Well, technically, I’m a robin, and my name’s Cresta,” she corrected with a shake of the head in an attempt to deal with its ringing. “Oh, I do apologize for my lack of manners! What’s your name?”

“Damon, baby!” the sparrow answered, his volume as unstoppable as his mating. “Welp, see ya!”

“Wait, what?” Cresta gave an incredulous stare. “I thought we were going to stay mates and, you know, have chicks together!”

“Sorry missy, the only chicks I’m gonna have are the ones that come between my legs!” Damon said matter-of-factly while still maintaining his screechy tone. “You were a good one for sure! See ya!” With that, he flew off to continue his never-ending quest to lie with and deafen the entire forest.

Cresta felt a blazing heat rise to her head, which was both less and more pleasant than her lower body like she was used to. “Well, fine!” she squawked, her wings and heart beating furiously. “I wouldn’t want to have your kids anyway! They’d probably be a bunch of sloppy mockingbirds who can only speak in pickup lines!” She sat on the branch and crossed her wings in a huff, not caring how many forest animals were staring at her. For the record, it was nine.

Thank you, forest, she thought sourly. Thank you so cheeping much.

End of Part 1

Spike and Peewee Save All the Days

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“Wow…” Peewee sat in awe at the latest adventure Spike had shared with him. “You and your friends really got to be superheroes?!”

“You bet we did!” Spike replied, pacing in excitement until it hit him with the force of a bucket, freezing him in place. “Wait…how can I understand you?”

“I dunno,” Peewee said with a shrug. “Magic?”

“Wait! I got it!” Spike exclaimed with a snap of his fingers, something Peewee wished he could do, if only he had fingers to snap. “I remember it was mentioned in a trivia section at the end of one Power Ponies issue that Humdrum does have one superpower: the ability to talk with birds. Of course, since the Power Ponies never go anywhere with birds, that ability never gets to be useful, just like Humdrum…”

“Hey, while we’re on the subject,” Peewee cut in, “if this Humdrum guy is so useless, why does he still go on all of their adventures instead of humming or drumming or whatever he’s good at?”

“So he can be the comic relief,” Spike grumbled. “Anyway, it looks like I somehow managed to keep Humdrum’s powers of bird communication! Isn’t this great? Now you don’t have to write me notes to talk with me!”

“Yay!” Peewee cheered. “Thank goodness for that, because writing always hurt my beak and talons whenever I did it for too long.” He then gasped as an idea slapped him upside the head with the strength of something that wasn’t a bucket. “Ooh, can we do superhero stuff together? I’ve always wanted to fight crime and save the day as your sidekick!”

“Well, it would be fun,” Spike said uncertainly, “but I just want to make sure you handle yourself in a fight.”

“I sure can!” Peewee assured his dragonly brother. “I managed to escape a herd of teenage dragons AND I set a timberwolf on fire! Of course, I’m sure you’ve managed to burn all the timberwolves in the Everfree Forest by now!”

“Heh heh…sure, why not?” Spike replied as he rubbed the back of his head, partly out of nervousness and partly to take care of an itch there. “Well, in that case, I’d love to go heroing with you!”

“WOO!” Peewee rocketed around the room with joyous energy, all while singing the theme song he’d thought up for them: “Peewee and Spike are gonna save the day! Bad guys will say ow while the good guys say hooray!”

Spike laughed at Peewee’s enthusiasm and awesome theme song. “Boy, you sure are excited! Well, what are we waiting for then? Let’s go get some enchanted comics!”

“Yay!” Peewee shouted in glee. “We’re two enthusiastic young boys who are gonna save everything! This will be a piece of cake! Ooh, I hope it’s chocolate cake!”

----------

In a world where any creature can talk and any work of fiction inside the fictional world can be entered with the right enchantment, two mythical creatures that are considered too young to be cool are going to show everyone that they can be super awesome heroes like the best of them! Stepping up to the plate as Equestria’s latest comic-hopping superhero duo are:

“Snapdragon, the dragon who can breathe anything and snap his fingers!”

And his trusty sidekick:

“Powwee, the phoenix who can super fly and super cute!”

Together they will travel the comic book multiverse to solve everyone’s problems, geek out over meeting their favorite heroes and villains, and complain about continuity and character errors, all in the name of justice, friendship, and free food! And they won’t stop until they’ve gotten their grimy little claws in every comic book in Equestria!

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Spike staggered back inside the library while Peewee lied on top of his head ridge, the two of them exhausted from a busy day of heroing.

“Wow…what a day…” Spike gasped as he collapsed belly first onto the floor.

“You…said it…Spike…” Peewee added, his mouth as dry as the rice crackers ponies had kept giving him, apparently under the impression that he was an orange parrot who can spit fire rather than an orange phoenix who can spit fire.

“I still can’t believe we manage to take down every single villain in every enchanted comic in Equestria!” Spike breathed.

“Hey…what’d I tell you?” Peewee said with an affectionate pat to Spike’s head. “You’re awesome!”

“Aww, shucks, Peewee!” Spike felt his cheeks turn red and his stomach turn bluish-green. “I couldn’t have done it all without you! After all, I wasn’t the one who managed to stop the Sandblaster by luring that giant cat to use him as a litterbox!”

“Well, what can I say?” Peewee replied, his chest puffing out as best it could, considering it was low on breath and pressed against Spike’s head ridge. “I have a way of appealing to cats’ tastes.”

The two of them shared a light laugh, then Peewee crawled off of Spike’s head ridge onto his claws so they could share a well-earned hug. They kept their embrace for several minutes until they heard a familiar voice ask from behind them, “What are you two doing on the floor?”

“Hey Twi,” Spike groaned. “We’re too tired to move. Been busy beating all the comic book baddies.”

“Mhm,” Peewee confirmed softly.

“Yeah, about that…” Twilight said as she lifted them with her magic and placed them on their special armchair. “I was just talking with Enchanted Comics, and it looks like they’re about to go out of business.”

Spike and Peewee felt their energy return quite quickly at Twilight’s words. “WHAT?!”

“Yeah, apparently since you solved all the conflicts in the comics, that means there’s no more conflict they can use for later comics,” Twilight explained. “Conflict is a key part of any story, after all.”

“But…comics are an essential part of my boyhood!” Spike cried. “Why am I being punished for helping out my favorite fictional characters?!”

“The universe is so mean!” Peewee huffed with a cross of his wings.

“Don’t worry, Spike, there is a bright side in this situation,” Twilight assured him with a smile. “Enchanted Comics was impressed by your heroics and offered you a position as an official story writer!”

“Wha–really?!” Spike felt wings grow inside his spirit (though sadly they had yet to grow outside his body). “I seriously have a chance to create stories for all my favorite comics?!”

“The universe is so nice!” Peewee cheered.

“Well, they figured a devoted fan who’s intimately familiar with all the inner works of their worlds would be able to offer some fresh material,” Twilight said. “Also, they pretty much admitted they had run out of original ideas, so this is really convenient for them.”

“Oh, thank you so much, Twi!” Spike gave the former victim of lavender unicorn syndrome a great big hug, while Peewee gave her horn a greatish little hug.

“You’re welcome, Spike,” Twilight giggled. When they let go of the hug, she added, “Oh, and there’s one more big surprise I’ve got for you!”

“Is it a date with Rarity?” Spike asked hopefully.

“Is it cookies shaped like me?” Peewee suggested.

“Even better! It’s…” A flash of magic, and a not-so-small stack of papers now stood beside Twilight. “…a stack of forms you get to help me with!”

Spike stared blankly and gave a flat “What,” one so flat, it didn’t even merit the use of a rising inflection normally indicated in writing by a question mark. Twilight would balk at the breach of grammar, but she’s not the boss of this story, is she?

“Well, if you’re going to have a job as a writer, it’s better to get any important chores out of the way first, right?” Twilight offered with a winning smile that failed to win over either of the boys before her. “Now come on, I have a lot to do as a princess, and princesses never do paperwork by themselves! Rarity taught me that!” With that, she levitated her stack of papers to the desk and trotted over, quill and inkwell at the ready.

“Et tu, Rarité?” Spike gasped with a theatrical grasp of his heart.

“Spike, is the universe bipolar?” Peewee asked nontheatrically.

“Sure feels that way,” Spike said with a resigned sigh.

“I can fix this!” Peewee took a deep breath and spit a nice little fireball at the stack of papers, setting them ablaze, with Twilight’s mane soon to follow. “Another conflict solved!”

Spike saw a telltale twitch develop on Twilight’s face and said, “Uh…I wouldn’t say that.” With a newfound burst of energy, he grabbed Peewee and jetted out the front door, with a raging alicorn in pursuit. “Conflict to be concluded!”

The End

Old Pet, New Pet

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Things were going well for the residents of Golden Oaks Library on this sunny Saturday afternoon. Twilight had arranged a picnic lunch for her and Spike as a treat for his hard work and his sweet new gig as a comic writer. It was to be a special family bonding experience, at least until Peewee decided he wanted to join their picnic, totally throwing off the carefully planned bonding Twilight had prepared. Of course, she couldn’t just turn Peewee away without upsetting Spike, so the cute little third wheel was now a part of the familial bonding bicycle traveling down picnic lane…or however the metaphor goes.

“Mmm, this is some good potato salad!” Twilight said, tactfully making sure to chew and swallow before speaking. “How did you get so good at cooking?”

“Lozza pradice ed cugbugs,” Spike answered mid-bite, making sure to swallow after a disapproving look from Twilight. “Someone had to be the cook of the family, anyway!”

“And just what is that supposed to mean?” Twilight demanded.

“Come on, Twi, remember when you tried to cook bean burgers and hay fries for the Summer Wrap-Up barbeque? You ended up causing so much heat that autumn had to be delayed a week! Still not sure how that happened…”

“Magic: the best and worst thing in existence!” Peewee chirped.

“Okay, okay, you got me!” Twilight giggled. “So, how’s your first comic coming along?”

“Oh, it’s going good!” Spike replied with an eager smile.

“Going well,” Twilight corrected in her signature know-it-all manner.

“That too!” Spike said, prompting another giggle from Twilight. “I’ve got this cool idea for a superhero bird that can fly superfast and attack with fiery spitballs, and he’s trying to save his dragon caretaker from an evil dragon that wants to turn the world into an edgy teenage wasteland!”

Twilight giggled once again, because third time’s the charm. “That’s certainly an interesting idea! How did you think it up?”

“Oh, it just came to me,” Spike answered with a surreptitious glance at a certain young phoenix who had just eaten a pudding cup in one bite.

“I’m the very image of heroism!” Peewee cried out, a chocolate mustache adorning his ever-adorable visage. The three of them got a serious case of the giggles that seemed incurable, at least until an unexpected visitor came by and cured them more efficiently than Celestia’s personal doctor could have.

“Spiiike?” They stopped short and stared at the diminutive green creature that had arrived at their picnic spot. “At last, I have found you again!”

“Is that…one of your sea beasts?” Twilight asked in astonishment.

“It sure is!” Spike ran up to the smiling creature with a cute smile of his own and gave him a big hug. “It’s so great to see you again! How have you been?”

“Eh, good and bad,” the sea beast replied. “Good because I discovered the joys of gambling, but bad because it made me impure and I had to leave my brethren in shame, but good again because I found you again! Praise be to mixed blessings!”

“Uh…okay…” Spike said, not sure whether to feel more delighted or concerned for him. Thankfully, Peewee came to his rescue by distracting everyone from the awkwardness.

“Spike, who is this?” the young phoenix asked. “Is this one of those things I missed while I was away?”

“Oh, sorry!” Spike picked up the sea beast and showed him to Peewee, allowing them to boop each other’s noses, the universal sign of friendship, even thought neither of them had noses. “This is one of the sea beasts I raised while you were gone…uh…I never gave any of you names, did I? …Oops!”

“Don’t worry, Spiiike,” the sea beast assured him. “We all found our own names through meditation and looking deep inside to find our true selves…and my true self’s name is Greengye! Isn’t it glorious?” Spike and the others could only stare at the marvel of his spiritual essence.

“Uh, okay! Hello Green…gye!” Peewee greeted with a smile, one that lasted all of two seconds before realization stomped all over his happy place. “Wait…you got another pet while I was gone?”

“A whole colony of us, actually!” Greengye gushed. “Our great caretaker Spike raised us and gave us the sentience and knowledge to overcome our strife and achieve true enlightenment! If it weren’t for his guiding claw, we would be nothing more than just another cheap advertisement from the back of a cool comic book!”

Spike felt his face grow hot from the glowing praise his reverent follower was giving him. “Aww, well, come on, it was nothing, really…”

“You…you replaced me?” Peewee asked, his tear ducts welling up and threatening to flow like the faucet in the library bathroom that he may or may not have ripped off that one time.

“What?! O-of course not!” Spike stammered. “It’s just…I missed you so much, and, well, I guess I really wanted to have that company again, to raise someone special and teach them all I know!”

“And you couldn’t have done a better job of that!” Greengye assured him, giving Spike’s claw a warm hug.

“Aww, come on, Greenie!” Spike said, his blush radiating enough heat to fry the metaphorical egg on his face.

“Greenie?!” Peewee squawked. “You have an affectionate nickname for him?! You never gave me one! You do love him more than me!”

“No no, I swear I don’t!” Spike cried out, waving his arms frantically and giving Greengye quite a dizzying thrill ride that he wished he could share with the rest of his brethren.

“I hope…sniff…you two are real happy together!” With that, he flew away with a sobbing melody and a trail of tears. The other three could only stare at the scene that had just happened.

“I sense that I’ve made a…how you say, boo-boo,” Greengye said. “Perhaps I should have come at a different time?”

“Sometime when I wasn’t trying to bond with Spike would have been nice,” Twilight grumbled under her breath.

“What was that?”

“Nothing!” Twilight cried, a plastic smile stamped to her face.

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Peewee was sitting on his perch crying his eyes out, enough so that he had to use tape to keep them in, and was doing what he usually did when his heart was all cracked up: stuffing himself with chocolate while watching bad movies. He was currently watching a silly romantic movie and was at the point where the guy was doing a big, cheesy gesture to win back his beloved. Seriously, what is it with these movies having their couples do something over the top to win each other over? I may be young and naïve, but even I know that sort of thing isn’t realistic…

His thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice singing soulful lyrics accompanied by surprisingly good guitar strumming, because the laws of musicals bestow magical instrument proficiency upon anyone who takes part in them:

I was a fool

A sad and lonely fool

I just wanted someone cool

To ease the pain

But once I was alone again

I realized it wasn’t the same

I was still the same lonely fool

Who needs to better practice his rhymes

Oh Peewee, don’t you see?

You’re the only one for me

I will do whatever I can

To earn your love again

Peewee felt his tears turn joyful as the song healed the cracks in his heart and distracted his brain from giving him a reality check. “Oh Spike, I can’t stay mad at you!” With his spirit now light as air again, at least partly due to a mighty belch before taking off, he flew outside toward the serenading Spike and hugged him so their hearts could touch once again. “Aw Spike, I’m sorry I was so jealous! I should have known you could never replace me in my heart!”

“No, Peewee, I should be the one who’s sorry!” Spike sobbed, dropping the guitar on the ground and matching Peewee’s tiny hug with a great big one of his own. “I should never have tried to replace you! You’re one of a kind! From now on, it’s just you and me!”

“Oh, Spike!” The two of them nuzzled each others’ cheeks, and then Peewee turned his face so that his beak met Spike’s mouth in a tender kiss.

“Whoa whoa whoa, what the hay?!” Spike exclaimed, drawing back in shock. “What are you doing?!”

“I was giving you a kiss, like everyone in those romantic movies does when they make up!” Peewee explained.

“But this isn’t a romantic movie!” Spike shot back. “This is a ‘pet and owner reconcile’ type thing!”

Peewee stared. “You mean…we’re not in love?”

“No!”

“Oh.” The two of them stood there in awkward silence for several seconds until Peewee broke it with, “So…whatever happened with Greengye, anyway?”

“Oh, he said he wanted to ‘spread the message of his brethren’s zen’ to those who would listen,” Spike explained. “I think he went over to Fluttershy’s house to start.”

----------

“…and thus I say to you, the path to nirvana lies within you!” Greengye said to the crowd of animals before him. “As long as you keep the great Spiiike within your hearts, anything is possible!”

The throng of animals before him burst into applause, partly out of reverence and partly out of gratitude for spicing up their normally plain lives, all except for a certain little bunny who was watching the whole spectacle with a scowl planted firmly on his face.

That fool so needs to die, Angel thought.

The End

The Great Switcheroo–Part 1

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Part 1

It had been about a month or so since Peewee had returned to Ponyville (at least he thought it was; he stil didn’t fully understand time beyond the sun rising and falling), and everything was going hunky-dory for him. Not as much as famed celebrity Hunky Dory, of course, but then, Peewee didn’t know who that was, so he had no reason to be jealous. Not only were he and Spike as close as two peas in a fire-breathing pod, but they were also the latest hit in the comic industry! Spike’s first comic issue of his new series “Powwee the Power Phoenix” had debuted yesterday and was already turning out to be quite a hot seller, largely due to its uniqueness, because apparently no one else had thought up of a phoenix superhero before (something that definitely surprised Peewee). Spike was starting to get recognition as a rising star of the comic world (though they were strangely unaware of the time he saved the Crystal Empire) and Peewee himself was becoming something of a mascot around Ponyville, getting quite a few hugs from ponies around town, which he certainly wasn’t complaining about!

Of course, as the old saying goes, every paradise has its thorn, and Peewee’s was no exception.

The biggest thorn in Peewee’s butt was Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Do-Nothing-But-Be-A-Bossy-Pants-Without-Wearing-Pants…Kingdom. For one, she still didn’t like Peewee wandering around without someone supervising him, so his adventures were mostly restricted to hanging around the dusty library or tagging along on the occasional errand when no one could babysit him there. On the bright side, Spike was often there to keep him company, which often made it worthwhile, especially when he was working on comic book material. He was receptive to his ideas, and in fact he supplied most of Powwee’s dialogue. Apparently Peewee was a comedy genius; who knew?

Of course, even with a promising new position as a comic book writer, Spike was still Twilight’s assistant, meaning that she continued to assign him chores that she could have easily done herself, but apparently she needed the extra time to read more books or something. Peewee didn’t like it when Twilight interrupted their bonding time, so he tended to respond by giving her a nice hard peck on the head, which didn’t exactly improve their relationship.

Today was the lowest point of the whole ordeal. This morning he had set that mean bunny Angel’s tail on fire for trying to violate that Greengye with a carrot, something that freaked out Fluttershy on multiple levels, and now Twilight had him on lockdown, confining him to a magical cage in the basement while she worked things out. To make things worse, Peewee hadn’t had a chance to poop yet, since he was going out to take his morning poop when he stumbled upon Angel, and he was afraid to poop in the cage in case it caused the magic in it to shock him or turn him into a toad or something, so he was holding it in and hoping that he’d get a chance to poop somewhere non-magical sometime before he exploded from holding it in. He wasn’t sure if that could happen, but it sure felt possible!

Thankfully, the young phoenix didn’t have to wait long for Twilight to return with Spike in tow, her magic dragging him by his ear-spine or whatever it’s called. “Ow, come on, Twi!” Spike griped. “This is no way to treat a professional comic book writer!”

“Spike, I have had it with your pet!” Twilight shouted as they made it to Peewee’s cage. “He’s been causing trouble ever since he returned, and now he’s crossed the line!”

“Are you still upset that he burned my basket?” Spike asked, rubbing his ear-spine after it was let go. “I already told you it was no big deal! I was getting too big for my basket, anyway.”

“Spike, Peewee set Angel on fire!” Twilight barked in a way that would make Cerberus proud. “Fluttershy was practically traumatized! If Peewee wasn’t so cute, who knows what she would have done to him?!”

“Aww, thanks Twilight!” Peewee said with a smile. Nice to see she’s not a total meanie!

“You burned Angel?!” Spike cheered with an ever bigger smile. “Haha, way to go, Peewee! That oughta teach him to mess with you!” He reached out to touch his claw with Peewee’s wing–a “clawingbump”, as they called it–only for Twilight to swat it down in fury. “OW!”

“Are you insane?!” Twilight screeched as smoke started to eminate from her mane. “He set another animal on fire and you’re praising him for it?!”

“Come on, Twilight, you know how much of a jerk Angel is!” Spike retorted. “Peewee was just trying to be a hero by giving that bratty bunny the punishment he deserves! If anything, he deserves a reward for having such a big heart!”

“Yeah, you tell her, Spike!” Peewee chimed in, his heart bloating from the rush of ego boost.

Twilight responded by pressing a hoof tightly against her forehead and taking several deep breaths in an attempt to stop her inner Rapidash from breaking free and burning the place to smithereens. “Okay…I can appreciate you wanting to support your pet, but you’re clearly not being the best influence on him. I’m sorry, Spike, but you leave me no choice here.” With that, she started to light up her horn.

“Whoa whoa, what are you doing?!” Spike cried out.

“I’m going to cast a spell on Peewee to make him more obedient,” Twilight said, her horn aimed squarely at the stunned phoenix, whose beak was now agape in shock.

So much for that last thought…

“What?! No, you can’t do that!” Spike shouted as he sprang to action and clasped his claws around Twilight’s glowing horn.

“Spike, let go!” Twilight snapped, her magic straining to move Spike’s claws while still charging up her original spell, something that was greatly discouraged by her magic kindergarten teachers (apparently claws around the horn was a more common occurrence than one would suspect).

“No!” Spike screamed, wrapping his legs around Twilight’s front leg in a desperate attempt to avoid being tossed aside. “I won’t let you mess with Peewee’s mind!”

“It’s–for–his–own–GAH!” Without warning, Twilight’s magic went off with a bright flash that sent Spike flying. The last thing he thought before passing out was, Getting slammed into a wall shouldn’t hurt this much with spines…

----------

The first thing Twilight noticed when she woke up was that her horn ached like crazy. Ugh, that’s the last time I try to cast two spells at once…

The second thing she noticed was that the basement was a complete disaster zone. Furniture and equipment were strewn everywhere, and the floor was covered in papers she didn’t remember having out. Hmm, I guess a messed up lab area just wouldn’t be complete without random papers scattered about…

The third thing she noticed was Spike’s body lying face down on the floor. With a gasp, she galloped over to him and lifted his limp body with her hooves, shaking it gently yet frantically. “Spike?! Spike, are you okay?! I’m so sorry, Spike! Please say something!”

“Spike?” she heard him mutter. “What are you talking about? I’m Peewee!”

“Peewee? What are you…” Twilight froze as realization sunk in. Oh no…it’s come to this, hasn’t it?

Suddenly, the lab became filled with frantic chirping. Twilight turned and saw Peewee’s body flipping and flapping out, with the magical cage nowhere to be found. Must have disintegrated from the magic burst or something…

“Hey, how is someone else talking with my voice when…” Spike’s voice trailed away as his eyes opened and saw Peewee’s body across the basement. “Oh, it’s coming from my body! That explains everything! Wait…then what body…” With a shock, he noticed the claws at the ends of his arms and came to a stunning realization:

“WHOA I’M IN SPIKE’S BODY SO HE MUST BE IN MINE I DIDN’T KNOW MAGIC COULD DO THAT THIS IS SO AWESOME!”

Twilight sunk her head in resignation. Yep…just like my magic kindergarten teachers warned me…I really need to remember things better…

End of Part 1

The Great Switcheroo–Part 2

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Peewee had once wondered what it’d be like to be Spike, but he had never really thought about how different it’d feel to have his body, mainly because his train of thought dissolved once he realized being Spike would involve a lot of chores. Of course, now that it was actually happening, he realized just how amazing it really was! Not only was he big now (well, big compared to his original size, anyway), but he also had fingers! Well, technically they were claws, but who cares? They were still perfectly designed for snapping, something he’d always wanted to do ever since he saw Spike do it! His newly acquired dragon blood churning with excitement, he put his fingers together and…they just slipped pass each other without making a snapping noise.

“Hey, where’s the snappy noise?” Peewee-as-Spike griped as he kept fiddling with his fingers in vain (though it was still a lot of fun having fingers to play with). “Hey Spike, do you think you could help me out here?”

“Me help you out?!” Spike-as-Peewee squawked from across the room, his new birdy body enhancing his squawking skills quite well. “What about me?! I’m trapped in a bird’s body and I have no idea what to do with it!”

“Hey, cheer up, little guy!” Peewee said with a smile, one that Spike didn’t return for some strange reason. “Now that you’re a bird, you can finally fly! Like this!” At that, Peewee flapped his new arms and sprang up into the air…only to faceplant onto the floor. “Uh, I think your arms are busted or something.”

Spike responded with a facepalm, or rather, facewing. I can’t believe this is happening…

“Okay,” Twilight said, grabbing Peewee’s Spike head so their eyes met. “I want you to listen to me very carefully. I am going to contact my old teachers so I can figure out a way to reverse this. While I’m gone, you better not mess up Spike’s body or anything else, or you’re really going to regret it. You got that?”

“Mhm,” Peewee responded.

“Good.” She let go of Peewee’s Spike head and let it fall back on the floor. “Now stay here.” With that, she stormed up the stairs and out the door, her head steaming like the time Pinkie decided to roast marshmallows on a campfire in the middle of a sauna, an event that ensured Rarity would never invite her to another spa visit.

Once the coast was clear, Peewee blew a raspberry at the departed Twilight and was amazed at how much better it was compared to his usual raspberries, mainly due to Spike’s tongue being much longer than Peewee’s. Wow, Spike’s tongue is amazing! …The forked end is gonna take some getting used to, though. He also noticed that Spike’s body was also quite a bit heavier than his own when he tried to push himself up, though fortunately his new arms were also a lot stronger, giving him the successful push he needed. Now upright, he looked down at Spike’s belly and gave it an experimental pat, which rewarded him with a pleasant drum sound. “Ooh, this is perfect! Certainly a lot better than my old belly!” He then went to work on his new belly bongo, creating a soulful rhythm that would have moved the music god’s soul, if the music god was a thing that existed in Equestria.

“Hey, uh, Peewee?” Spike said over Peewee’s rhythm. “I’m glad you’re having fun with my belly, real impressive drumming, by the way, but do you think you could, uh, help me out here first?”

“Help you out with what?” Peewee asked, still immersed in his belly drumming.

“I can’t fly!” Spike cried, his newly acquired phoenix wings flapping like mad to no avail.

Peewee stopped short at that. “Oh wow, how could I be so stupid?” he berated himself with a slap to Spike’s head, which he noticed was a good deal harder than his old head (or maybe his old slapping appendage was just softer?). “I was whining about how I couldn’t snap fingers as well as you could, but I never considered that you wouldn’t be able to fly as well as I could!” He walked over to his old body, somewhat stiffly and wobbly due to how different his new legs were, not to mention how little he walked to begin with, and gingerly pet his familiar feathered head with a claw like Spike liked to do. “Does this help?”

“Ooh yeah, that’s the spot!” Spike cooed, his wings beating not unlike a hummingbird’s, but very unlike a dragon’s.

“Wow, this is so great!” Peewee breathed. “I never dreamed I’d one day get to pet myself!”

“Wow…I just realized how surreal this whole thing is,” Spike said.

“Yeah…me too…” The two of them stared at each other for a few seconds, all while Peewee continued stroking his old head, because it felt too good for a little awkwardness to get in the way of that. Just then, their stomachs growled in unison, prompted a gaggle of giggles between them. “Geez, you haven’t eaten anything in a while, have you?”

“Heh, well, you know, comic writing is pretty busy work!” Spike laughed. “Looks like you haven’t eaten in a while either!”

“Well, being a hero and getting punished for it can be pretty busy work as well!” Peewee responded with a toothy grin. Oh yeah, I have teeth now! And sharp ones to boot! Just imagine what I could chomp through! Including my tongue…ouch. “Hey, you wanna get some food?”

“You bet I do!” Spike cheered with a non-toothy grin. Aww…it’s gonna be tough eating without my trusty fangs… “Um…do you think you could carry me there?” How embarrassing…

“Sure, no problem!” Cupping Spike’s hands together, Peewee lifted his old body and cradled it like a baby bird that wasn’t him. “Wow, now I know what it’s truly like to cuddle myself!” he gushed, rubbing his old body against his new cheek.

Spike was in an awkward position, in more ways than one. He definitely found getting cuddled by himself enjoyable, even if it was a little embarrassing, but he got the feeling that Peewee would end up cuddling him indefinitely if he didn’t say something. “Uh, Peewee? Not getting any less hungry here.”

“Oh! Sorry!” Peewee said with a grimace. “Sometimes my cuteness can work against me, it seems!” He started to head to the kitchen, only to stop at the stairs.

“Hey, why’d you stop?” Spike asked. “There’s no food down here.”

“I…I’ve never walked up stairs before,” Peewee admitted. “Especially not in a body with longer legs. I don’t want to fall over and crush you…or me with you in me, or however it works.”

“It’s okay, I’ll help you out,” Spike assured him. “Just carefully lift one of your…uh, my…legs, and put it on the step in front of you.”

“Okay…” With awkward trepidation, Peewee lifted Spike’s right leg and placed it on the step as instructed.

“Good, now just do the same thing with the other leg.”

Peewee carefully lifted Spike’s leg on the bottom and quickly found his center of balance shift dangerously, something he quickly tried to correct by placing more pressure on the leg on the step while he lifted the other leg higher. Come on, legs, don’t fail me now! Fortunately, he managed to place it on the next step just fine.

“There you go!” Spike said with a proud smile. “Now just keep doing that until we make it to the top.”

As Peewee continued up the stairs, he found it easier and easier to move Spike’s legs as needed. Wow, I’m really starting to feel at home in Spike’s body! I’m really gonna miss it when I have to leave it…I wonder if I’ll be able to visit it sometimes? I bet we could be great friends! Assuming bodies can be friends with the people in them, of course…

Eventually, Peewee came to a stunning realization: he was out of stairs. “Hey…I made it! I can climb stairs now! I am…the Stair Master!” With that proclamation, trumpets and kazoos played an epic fanfare in his head, one fitting for his momentous accomplishment.

“Sorry Peewee, but only Fluttershy can be the Stare Master!” Spike said, giggling at his birdy dragon wit.

Peewee stared blankly into his own eyes. “I don’t get it.”

“Never mind,” Spike sighed. “Let’s go get some food!”

“Music to my ears!” Peewee added with a hungry grin. “Or, your ears, I guess…oh, whatever, chow time!”

----------

The two of them were now in the kitchen, eagerly looking forward to filling their empty stomachs. Spike-as-Peewee was sitting in the middle of the table like the sort of little centerpiece that fancy ponies would put for cheesy decoration, while Peewee-as-Spike was rummaging through the refrigerator in search of some scrumptious treats to satisfy Spike’s much bigger stomach. He decided to grab everything in reach (apart from the Brussels’s sprouts, of course) and place it on the table. “Lunch is served!” he announced in the fanciest accent he could affect, which is to say, about as fancy as a hay fry.

Spike giggled and grabbed the nearest thing to him: a nice, chilled sapphire. He clamped Peewee’s beak on the delectable gem, only for it to stop dead against it with a surge of pain. “AHH!” he yelped, dropping the sapphire in front of him. “Oh, right…birds can’t eat gems…”

“Gems?” Peewee put down the pudding cup he was about to eat and looked at the sapphire lying on the table before his body. “I never really got why you ate them before, but now that I am you…maybe we could trade?” he offered, holding the pudding cup out in the offering gesture of an offerer.

“Sure, why now?” The two of them traded their treats with hungry eagerness. “Trust me, you haven’t lived until you’ve feasted on a tasty gem!”

“Well, you’ve never steered me wrong before…” Peewee was hesitant about breaking Spike’s teeth at first, only to remember that dragon teeth were much tougher than phoenix non-teeth just in time for him to chomp down on the sapphire and experience an explosion of taste that he certainly didn’t expect. It was like rock candy mixed with blueberries and toothpaste. In other words, nirvana.

“Mmm!” Peewee gushed, strongly enough to warrant up to thirty M’s, except that would be annoying in writing. “Wow, who knew dragon taste buds were capable of this sort of crazy taste sensation making?”

Spike only giggle at that reaction. Well, that and chow down on an orange about Peewee’s size. Amazingly, despite the great decrease in stomach size, his appetite hadn’t diminished much. Of course, it couldn’t compare to Peewee’s appetite in his much bigger body; he had devoured about half the food on the table in less than five minutes.

“Man, Twilight’s not gonna be happy to see how you cleaned out the fridge,” Spike said with a chuckle.

“So?” Peewee responded with Spike’s mouth full of apple-flavored pasta, an experiment of Applejack’s that got mixed results. “She’s a princess; she can just get new food no problem, right? That’s the great part about being royalty: you can do anything you want!”

Spike laughed even harder at that quip. “I’ve been trying to tell that to Twi for ages now! Of course, you know how firmly the stick up her flank can be.”

Peewee burst into a table-pounding guffaw, at least until the food still in Spike’s mouth went down his throat, causing him to choke.

“Peewee!” Spike cried out in alarm. If only I wasn’t in such a small body that I don’t know how to use…

Thankfully, Spike’s worries were put at ease when Peewee figured out how to breath a nice strong flame that cleared the dragon’s throat quite efficiently…along with all the rest of the food on the table. “Ahem…excuse me!” Peewee said with an embarrassed smile.

“Oh boy…” Spike stared at the pile of ashes now sitting on the table. “I’m not cleaning that up.” A laugh track then played in his mind for some reason.

“Hey, I just remembered!” Peewee exclaimed. “Your fire can send letters to Celestia, right? Ooh, this is too good an opportunity to pass up!” With that, he scampered over to Twilight’s desk.

“You got a letter for her in mind?” Spike asked with a mischievous yet nervous grin.

“You bet I do!” Peewee placed a paper on the desk, grabbed a quill in Spike’s right hand, and started writing as best he could with his draconic extremities. “Dear Princess Celestia,” he recited out loud, “today I learned that Spike is the awesomest dragon who ever lived and he deserves his own holiday! It should have all sorts of food and games and his phoenix Peewee should be hugged by everyone! Also, why do you keep raising the sun? Wouldn’t it be better to teach it to raise itself? Otherwise it might get lazy and not make things bright whenever you oversleep or something. Also also, there’s a spider on your head. Just kidding! Your faithful stu–uh, princess, Twilight Sparkle. And done!” With the letter complete, he rolled it up like Spike always did, took a deep breath, and engulfed it in flames.

“Nicely done!” Spike praised. “I can only imagine how Celestia will react to that letter.” Hopefully I won’t get any heat from it…

----------

Princess Celestia was sitting on her throne, doing boring princess stuff, when she saw a familiar fire generate a slightly crumpled scroll in front of her. “Hm? A letter from Twilight?” she said quizzically. “It’s been too long since I’ve last received one from her. I hope nothing’s troubling her.”

She opened the scroll with her magic…only to be greeted with a strange array of chicken scratches. They looked like they were supposed to be words, but they were written very messily, as if whoever wrote them had only just started writing.

“If this is meant to be a prank…I don’t get it.”

----------

“Hehehe! This is fun!” Peewee said with an energetic jump in the air. “I can’t wait to see what fun I can have outside!”

Spike did a double-take at that. “Wait…you’re leaving?! But…Twilight said you were supposed to stay here!”

“Forget Twilight!” Peewee whined. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and I’m gonna make the most of it before she ruins it all over again! I have bigger arms to hug the world, and I’m not gonna let go!” With that, he opened the front door and started out on another little adventure.

Spike could only sit there in disbelief. Why can things never be simple?

End of Part 2

The Great Switcheroo–Part 3

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Part 3

It was a truly wonderful day to be able to roam freely about, especially for a certain young phoenix in a dragon’s body. Peewee was celebrating his romp the best way he new how: by skipping merrily down the street (something he’d always wanted to do but never had the legs to do so) and singing a merry song:

I’m a dragon, I’m a dragon!
I am totally a dragon!
I can have so much fun
While being a dragon!

I have arms with fingers
I can eat shiny rocks
And my fire’s all magical
Because I am a dragon!

It was a truly glorious song, especially coming from Spike’s vocal chords. Peewee didn’t mind that the lyrics had no structure or that the ponies he passed by were giving him strange looks; he was having the time of his life! Or…Spike’s life, maybe? He decided not to dwell on that again, considering how much it made Spike’s head hurt.

He had been skipping and singing for about a minute when he noticed another voice had joined his singing. Confused, Peewee opened Spike’s eyes and saw Pinkie Pie bouncing alongside him, echoing his lyrics with a cheery smile, despite them not applying to her.

Peewee felt Spike’s body skid to a stop. “Uh…hello?”

“Hello!” Pinkie said in her usual chipper tone filled with enough sugar to give a full-grown Ursa Major diabetes. “It’s great to see you having fun outside again! You’ve been so busy with your comics I was worried you’d been sucked into them again and I’d have to save you as Fili-Second or whoever is in your comics!”

“Heh, that’s a fun idea, but nope!” Peewee responded. “I decided to take a break from my comic that I’m writing cause I’m Spike of course, and I was hoping I could get some sweets to celebrate?”

“Absolutely-flutely!” Pinkie answered, her smile gleaming with surprisingly white teeth for a pony whose diet must have been at least 50% sugar. “Come with me and ol’ Pinkie Pie will get you set up with the usual!”

“Oh boy!” Peewee said excitedly. “Can I ride on your back?”

“Of course!” The pink pony grabbed Spike’s body with her front hooves and placed it on her back, oblivious to the amount of physics she broke in the process. “Ride ‘em, cowpoke!” With that, she bounced back toward her place of residence and party planning, Sugarcube Corner. Peewee found the ride there to be a little more uncomfortable than expected, due to the constant bouncing. It was fast and exciting, but it wasn’t easy on Spike’s crotch, and getting hit there stung more then it did in his old body for some reason. He could still feel Spike’s head bouncing up and down when Pinkie was done with her bouncing, only really noticing it was over when he found himself seated at a table.

“Ahem!” Peewee turned and saw Pinkie dressed in a waiter suit she got from who knows where except her, holding a tray with a shiny blue cupcake on it. “One sapphire-studded chocolate cupcake for the young writer!” she said in a surprisingly good fancy tone as she lowered the tray onto the table.

“Yay!” The eager phoenix-in-a-dragon’s-body lunged forward and stuffed the cupcake in Spike’s watering mouth. He could feel Spike’s taste buds burst into colorful fireworks upon contact with the sweet bejeweled pastry. “Mmm!” Peewee gushed again, this time one worthy of forty M’s. “Sweet sweetness in such a sweet package! Thank you so much, Pinkie!”

“Not a problem, little guy!” Pinkie replied in her normal voice. “I’d love to stay and hang out with you, but I’ve got a 'I Filed My Taxes for the First Time' party to plan! I’ve gotta get some tax-filing related decorations and a lawyer to read the fine print! Catch ya later, Peewee!” With that said, she zoomed out the door, her waiter outfit remaining where she used to be for some reason until it fell to the ground a couple of seconds later.

Peewee sat there basking in the aftermath of the sweet sensation he had experienced, only for a harsh realization to snap him rudely back into reality. Wait…how did she know it was really me?! I look and act just like Spike…what could have given it away? He looked over to Gummy who was sitting on the counter and staring blankly off at nothing as usual. “Hey, do you know if Pinkie can read minds?”

Gummy let loose a gurgle that Peewee interpreted as, I WAS ONCE LIVE-ACTION AND I’VE NEVER BEEN THE SAME SINCE.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Peewee replied with a sigh.

----------

Spike was still sitting on the table where Peewee had left him, his phoenix butt getting sore from boredom. Well, this is a lot of fun, isn’t it? he thought sourly. Being stuck in Peewee’s body with the real Peewee running around with my body while I can’t do anything with his…what did I do to deserve this?

Well, you did kind of steal Peewee’s body, Peewee’s brain chided. Not exactly a class act.

Hey, it wasn’t exactly my choice…wait a minute, where’d that voice come from?!

From the brain you hijacked, of course! Peewee’s brain snapped.

Hey, lay off him! Peewee’s heart cut in. He said it wasn’t his fault!

I don’t care! Peewee’s brain retorted. He shouldn’t be here! He doesn’t know how to use me!

Oh dear Celestia, am I losing my mind?! Spike thought in panic.

That’s right! Peewee’s brain responded evilly. The real Peewee has made off with your brain, and now you’re stuck with a brain that won’t let you use it to its fullest potential! Go ahead and try to calculate the mass of Peewee’s body now! I dare you…

And you still wonder why it never worked between us, Peewee’s heart griped.

“AAAAAAAAAAH!” Spike let loose a high-pitched scream in an attempt to shut out the bizarre voices.

“Is something troubling you, little phoenix?” he heard another voice ask. Thankfully, this voice came from somewhere outside his head. He turned and saw Owlowiscious flutter over to the kitchen table beside him.

“Hey Owlowiscious,” Spike sighed. “This may be kind of hard to believe, but…I’m kind of not the same little phoenix you know and love.”

“Oh, really?” Owlowiscious said in a surprised tone that sounded rather exaggerated to Spike’s phoenix earholes. “And what are you trying to insinuate with that? That you’re someone else in Peewee’s body? Namely, a certain young dragon who was nervous about me taking his place as Miss Twilight’s number one assistant? Is that the notion you’re trying to imply?”

Spike stared. “How did you know?”

“It wasn’t difficult to deduce what was going on when you and everyone else were making quite the commotion earlier,” Owlowiscious stated matter-of-factly. “I must say, I’m disappointed in the way Twilight has been treating you two, especially Peewee. I mean, Peewee is just a young child! Whatever does she expect from the lad? Why, I myself caused a fair bit of trouble in my youth! Shall I regale you with some tales of that fun period?”

“Thanks, but I’m not really in the mood for storytelling,” Spike sighed. “I’m too concerned about what sort of chaos Peewee is capable of causing in my body, all while I’m stuck here, unable to do anything about it…”

“You don’t know how to fly in Peewee’s body, right?”

Spike gave a dejected nod.

“Well, I’d be happy to help you with that if you would like,” Owlowiscious offered.

“You can do that?” Spike asked, Peewee’s eyes sparkling in anticipation. “But…aren’t owl wings kinda different from phoenix wings?”

“I believe the basics of flight apply to any species of bird with flight capabilities,” Owlowiscious answered. “Miss Twilight has some good books on flight mechanics that should be useful. Hang on, I’ll go get one to get us started!” With that, the astute owl flew off toward the bookshelves.

Great, Spike thought grumpily. Just what every bird loves to do when they want to fly: reading. I wonder how the real Peewee learned how to fly…

----------

“…and that’s why I think Twilight should share her horns and wings with everyone!” Peewee concluded to the red stallion standing in front of the apple cart. “Except for Angel, of course! Make him a carrot, see how he likes it! So what do you think?”

Big Macintosh gave the young phoenix-in-a-dragon-body a long stare. “Nnnope.”

“What, you’ve got a better idea?” Peewee said as he put Spike’s hands on his hips in a “tough guy” pose. “Well, let’s hear it then!”

“Nnnope.”

“Geez, you’re a real fun conversationalist, aren’t you?” Peewee griped, Spike’s face leaned forward to match Big Mac’s as much as his short height would allow. “I may not be a know-it-all like Twilight, but even I know responding to everything with the same word isn’t exactly the best way to get attention.”

“Nnnope,” Big Mac replied, though it was hard to tell if it was out of agreement or troll-ment due to how stoic his face remained.

Peewee could feel Spike’s face almost literally steam as he grabbed Big Mac by the yoke and pulled his head down to his level. “SAY WORDS!” Peewee demanded, Spike’s fangs bared rather impressively. “SAY OTHER WORDS!”

“Dang it all, what do you want from me?!” Big Mac snapped, lifting his head high enough to lift Spike’s body off the ground. “I was just setting up the apple stall, and here you come, all talking about wings and horns and Princess Twilight out of nowhere when I’m just trying to make a living tending to the farm and helping my sis out, how am I supposed to deal with all the weird stuff in this town, especially when my granny won’t let me say anything around her, wanting me to be this dang ol’ strong and silent type when I have a mind full of thoughts to share and…”

Big Mac’s tirade was interrupted by Peewee clamping his mouth shut with Spike’s hand. “You know what? Just stick with not saying anything. It’s simpler that way.”

“What in blazes are ya doing, Spike?!” Applejack’s voice rang out from nearby. “Leave my brother alone before you scare away all our customers!”

Yes! At least somepony thinks I’m really Spike! “Uh, sorry, AJ!” Peewee said with a pacifying grin. “Just, uh, going through puberty!” He wasn’t sure what exactly “puberty” was, but he had once overheard a mare complain about how it was making her son act like a total basket case, so he figured it’d be a good excuse.

“Ain’t you a little young for that?” Applejack asked him, an eyebrow raised in typical skeptical fashion.

“Hey, just because Twilight won’t stop calling me a ‘baby dragon’ doesn’t mean I still am a baby!” Peewee asserted, Spike’s chest puffed out to emphasize his immense manliness. “For all you know, I could be a legal adult by now! Hey, that means I can drive now! Do you know where I can find a car?”

Applejack gave a resigned sigh. I swear I’m going to regret this…

----------

“WOOHOO!” Peewee cheered. “I’m finally driving! This is so awesome!”

“Eyes on the road,” the driving instructor reminded in a bored tone.

“Yes, ma’am,” Peewee responded in the same bored tone as his vehicle continued forward at a walking pace.

…Still awesome!

The End

The Great Switcheroo–Part 4

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Part 4

Spike flapped Peewee’s wings vigorously, his eyes scrunched closed in concentration.

“Remember what I taught you, young drake!” Owlowiscious said.

“I get it, I get it!” Spike insisted with a groan. “Let me concentrate, please!” Upon achieving silence, he put forth all his effort into reaching liftoff the “wise owl way,” as Owlowiscious called it, apparently unaware that there were plenty of dumb owls out there who knew how to fly.

“Spike?”

“I said let me concentrate!”

“Open your eyes, lad!”

“Huh?” Spike opened Peewee’s eyes and noticed with a surge of joy that he was about a foot above the table he had been confined to for what felt like forever, a feeling he wouldn’t truly know for several hundred years. “Hey, I’m flying! I’m actually flying! Owlowiscious! Can you see that I’m flying? Because I am flying so hard!”

“Yes, I can see that quite clear,” Owlowiscious responded with a giggle. “Feels quite uplifting, doesn’t it?”

“It sure does!” Spike cried out as he started flying around the room. “It feels so good, I don’t even care that you used a lame pun to describe it!” He flew over to the proud owl and gave him a nuzzle with Peewee’s beak. “Thank you so much, Owlowiscious!”

“Glad to be of service, Spike,” Owlowiscious replied with a warm smile.

Spike continued his joyous flight, even managing to pull off a successful somersault, one worthy of a hearty wingclap courtesy of Owlowiscious. However, such a dizzying feat left him literally dizzy, prompting him to perch on the windowsill so Peewee’s brain could realign, hopefully without it giving a nagging in the process. That is, until he saw something outside that caused Peewee’s heart to drop down into his stomach.

No…this is truly the worst possible thing…

----------

Peewee was strutting down the street, feeling the sunshine emanating from Spike’s body. Not because he was actually able to get a driver’s license–he ended up failing his driving test five minutes in due to not braking for a passing snail–but because he had finally figured out how to snap Spike’s fingers! Truly this was the epitome of the whole experience, or however the fancy books put it.

He continued his trek around town, fingers snapping to the beat of his own drum (his hum drum?), when he noticed Rarity walking by, using her magic to levitate some bags that no doubt had some fashion stuff in them or something. Suddenly, inspiration struck from the recesses of Spike’s big brain! Of course! Why didn’t I think of this sooner?! I’m in the perfect position to do what Spike never had the guts to do: confess his love to Rarity! It’ll solve everything!

“Rarity! Hey, Rarity!” Peewee called out, Spike’s little legs taking off at full speed toward the fancy-schmancy white unicorn. “Can we talk?”

“Oh, hello there, Spike!” Rarity greeted, her smile showing no awareness of what the wily phoenix had planned. “I was just about to continue work on my latest fashion line! Care to help?”

“As fun as that sounds,” Peewee responded with a grimace, “I kinda have something important to tell you.”

“Of course! What is it, Spike?”

“Peewee, no!” Peewee glanced to the side and saw Spike flying towards him in his old body, looking more panicked than the time he had accidentally ripped off the tag on Twilight’s mattress, a crime no one else but Peewee knew about to this day.

Excited that Spike would be able to see his good deed up close and personal, Peewee decided to cut to the chase. “I love you, Rarity! I want to be your boyfriend and hug and kiss and OW HEY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!“

Spike was pecking at Peewee furiously with his old beak. “You–are–such–a–blabbermouth!”

“Come on, man, I gotta do this!” Peewee shouted as he swatted at the cock-blocking cock. “You’re not the brave dragon here!”

“Hey, I’m still brave!” Spike defended. “Just…why’d you have to tell her?! I wasn’t ready!”

“When were you gonna be ready? After getting a driver’s license?” Peewee asked snidely.

“Hey, who needs a driver’s license when you’ve got ponies you can ride on?” Spike said with as smug a smile as Peewee’s beak would allow. “That’s not something the average pony gets to do, you know.”

“Hmm…” A few moments of awkward silence hung over the scene, all while Rarity remained frozen in the same position she had been in about half a minute ago, as though she was posing for an ice sculpture devoted to awkward targets of love confessions. Suddenly, Peewee noticed a strong pressure around Spike’s bottom area that felt familiar and yet strange at the same time. “Ooooooh, gotta go, gotta go, gotta go!” he cried out as he ran off back to the library tree.

He made his way to the bathroom, a room he never used to have any use for as a phoenix, even though he’d seen Spike use it numerous times. Well, he’d never actually seen him use it, he just saw him enter it and then close the door, because apparently pony and dragon poops were too scandalous for the general public to witness. Either that or they were a lot messier than phoenix poops. Or maybe other poops were just a myth? Who could say for sure?

At this point, two rather smelly problems occurred to Peewee. For one, he didn’t know how to use a toilet. What exactly is this thingy supposed to do? Is it like a birdbath for poop or something? Wow, that’s a much fancier treatment than poop in the forest ever got! Well, except that old crow that tried to make elaborate poop statues of himself…I’m surprised he never had a mate.

The second thing he realized was that the pressure wasn’t coming from Spike’s bottom, but more from his groin. Peewee was feeling quite a bit of panic since he’d never gone from that part of any body before. W-what am I supposed to do?! I don’t see any hole there or anything! Am…am I going to explode?! Will I still be able to resurrect from the ashes as Spike? We can both breathe fire; that’s close enough, right? Ooooooh…

----------

Spike was sulking on a table outdoors, sipping a milkshake that somepony had left behind after Spike had accidentally pooped on her tail. Why does the universe keep making a fool out of me? Did I do something in a past life that got Lady Luck to hold a grudge against me? I mean, I’m a freaking dragon! …Well, most of the time, at least. Doesn’t that count for anything?

He wallowed in his bitter thoughts and somewhat less bitter milkshake for several more minutes until he noticed a shadow cast overhead. He braced himself for the inevitable raincloud until he heard a familiar “Ahem!”

“Twilight!” Spike turned to the cross alicorn beside him and managed to pull off a toothy grin with Peewee’s beak. “I was just…uh…”

“Save your explanations for when I can understand them,” Twilight said with a weary sigh, using her magic to drag Spike’s phoenix butt along with her. “I know what I have to do to fix this, so let’s just get you and Peewee in the right bodies before something gets broken. Please tell me Peewee’s still in the library.”

Spike gave as big a nod as he could in his position.

“Oh, thank Celestia for small miracles!” Twilight exclaimed as she stepped into her humble abode and placed Peewee’s body on her desk. “Alright, you stay there while I¬–”

Her speech was cut off by an alarmed yelp coming from the bathroom. “YEOW, WHAT IS THIS?!”

“Of course…” Twilight galloped up to the bathroom and could only stare at the sight before her: there was liquid everywhere, including on Spike’s body, which was laying on the ground like a beached salmon that had discovered too late that it was somehow able to pee.

Peewee noticed Twilight’s literally smoking appearance and gave a weak grin. “Well, what do you know? Peewee has a wee-wee now! That’s…that’s good, right?”

…Yep, I’m definitely dead. I bet she has magic to stop me from resurrecting, too. At least I had it good up till now…

End of Part 4

The Great Switcheroo–Part 5

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Part 5

Peewee sat fearfully in the bathtub as Twilight furiously scrubbed all the soaked surfaces in the room with six different scrubbers, all while muttering things under her breath that Peewee probably shouldn’t have been around to hear. The young fledgling felt a curious desire to fiddle with his new appendage, but he didn’t want to risk getting Twilight even madder at him (if that was even possible), so he just sat as still as a statue, if the statue were wet and not anything like a statue at all.

Eventually, after what felt like minutes, Twilight finished her cleaning and put away the cleaning supplies. “Okay,” she began with a calm that belayed a massive storm, “now that that’s over with, I can clean you up…” She used her magic to lift Spike’s body out of the bathtub. “…switch you back…” She levitated a towel and wiped it all over his body with furious speed and thoroughness. “…and get you out of my mane once and for all!”

“But…”

“But nothing!” she screeched, meeting his eyes with a glare that was this close to unleashing heat vision. “You have been nothing but trouble ever since you came here! First it was the poop, then it was the burning, and now this?! I…I can’t even, okay?! I can’t even think of a good word to finish that sentence, and I got perfect grades in grammar and linguistics! When this is all over and done with, I want you out of here! You got that?!”

Peewee remained silent.

“Well?!”

“…Why do you hate me?” Peewee whimpered, tears coming to Spike’s eyes.

Seeing Spike’s face contorted in anguish quickly extinguished the flame growing on Twilight’s mane. “I don’t hate you, Peewee,” she assured him with a sigh. “I just…sometimes you just drive me crazy! It feels like I can’t turn my back on you for two seconds without you causing some kind of trouble!”

“I don’t mean to cause trouble, honest!” Peewee replied. “I’m just trying to have fun and do the right thing! I guess…I’m just a poophead. A smarty-pants like you…no wonder you don’t like an idiot like me…”

“Oh, I don’t think you’re an idiot,” Twilight said, placing him back on the floor and giving him a calming stroke on his head. “You’re just young and naïve. Believe me, I had to deal with Spike being naïve and troublemaking when he was younger. If Celestia hadn’t figured out how to make his fire send things to her instead of burn them, who knows if I’d still be able to read books?”

Peewee couldn’t help but giggle at that, and, to his surprise, Twilight giggled along with him. “So…are we cool now?”

“As long as you promise to learn more about social norms and try to be more considerate about other feelings, I believe we can be,” she said with a smile. “I used to have a lot of trouble with that myself, so I can understand…”

“Used to?” Peewee scoffed. “Yeah, right!”

Twilight’s smile fell to the floor with a clatter. “Excuse me?”

“Well, you’re not always considerate of Spike!” Peewee cried with a stomp of Spike’s foot. “You make him do things you could easily do yourself, making it so we can’t spend as much time together! No offense, but it’s really hard to bond over chores, no matter how much your dad insists that cleaning the nest as a family is the true path to happiness…”

“Hey, Spike likes being my assistant!” Twilight defended. “He’s happy to help and I respect him very much for it!”

“Respect, huh?” Peewee shot back with a sarcastic eyebrow raise that would have made Spike proud. “Is that why you made him sleep in that dinky basket? I’ve slept in a bundle of twigs and even I know that’s bogus!”

“Hey, he doesn’t mind sleeping in a basket!” Twilight insisted, Spike’s eyebrow causing her annoyance to rise, as well as any self-respecting eyebrow should have. “He’s slept in them ever since he was a baby!”

“Really? I didn’t know he was still a baby,” Peewee said, sarcasm levels rising to near bursting levels. “Spike’s the only baby I know who doesn’t drink from a bottle or have his food chewed for him! He’s the only baby I know who does more work than their caretaker and writes a successful comic book! He’s the only baby I know who’s saved Equestria AND all the comic book worlds out there! Boy, if he can do all that as a baby, I can’t wait to see what he can do once he becomes a…non-baby! You really are the best princess ever for raising the best baby ev–”

“Alright, I get it!” Twilight snapped, then with a reluctant sigh, continued, “You’re right, Peewee. Spike’s not a baby anymore. I guess…I guess I’m just so used to looking over Spike whenever Celestia was too busy to do so…feeding him, teaching him, tucking him in…I really enjoyed being able to babysit him.”

“Even when he made messes?” Peewee asked.

“Okay, maybe not then,” Twilight conceded with a giggle. “Still…I really enjoyed it when Cadance babysat me, so I guess I just took it for granted that Spike would love it when I got to. The difference is…Cadance eventually let me go…but I never did with Spike…some babysitter I am…” She felt her eyes start to mist over and she closed her eyes in an attempt to collect herself, until she felt a familiar claw touch the back of her neck.

“It’s okay,” Peewee assured with a smile. “It’s not too late to treat Spike like the growing up guy he is. It’ll give him the chance to really fly… uh, figuratively. After all, my parents were willing to let me leave the nest, and look how I turned out!”

“Cooped back up in your old nest?” Twilight said in her well-refined snarky tone.

“Exactly!” Peewee gave a wide grin he never could as a phoenix. I’m definitely gonna miss being able to do that…

Twilight was now helpless against the giggles as they consumed her rational mind…up until they got bored a few seconds later and went off to hang out with Pinkie Pie again. “Alright, you’ve made your point,” she said once she regained control of herself. “I’ll stop treating Spike like a baby, but that means you’re going to start getting some personal lessons from me so you don’t cause trouble like you have before. Deal?”

After a few moments of contemplating the possibilities of Spike becoming a man and Peewee getting all the fun squeezed out of him, the phoenix-in-a-dragon’s-body nodded Spike’s head and said, “Deal!” He then held out Spike’s arms and gave some pretty impressive puppy-dog eyes. “Hug?”

Twilight responded by pulling Spike’s body into her front legs and giving Peewee a warm embrace. “Hug.”

And the world contracted diabetes. Again.

----------

“Oh, Spikey-Wikey!” Rarity gushed as she held the young dragon in her front legs. “Why did you wait so long to tell me how you felt? We could have had so much kissy-time together!”

“Well, it’s not too late to kiss now, is it?”

“Of course not! Come here, you handsome dragon you!”

And the pony and dragon finally kissed after all these years.

Spike could only stare at the scene going on before him and cry out in agony.

“CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!”

----------

“SPIKE!”

“NO PEEWEE THAT’S NOT HOW YOU KISS…huh?” Spike looked around and noticed Twilight and his old body staring at him. “Uh…”

“We’re ready to switch you two back now,” Twilight informed him. “You ready to get back into your old body?”

Spike gave a nod, not looking too cheered up about it for some reason.

“Hey, you don’t have to worry, Spike!” Peewee assured him. “Twilight and I made up and she finally likes me! Isn’t that just miraculous?”

Twilight responded with a roll of the eyes and a quick giggle. “You want to know what else, Spike? Once you’ve gotten your old body back, you won’t have to do any chores you don’t want to anymore!”

Spike felt his spirits grow wings at that. “Really?”

Twilight didn’t know how to speak bird, but she got the gist of what Spike said by the way his face almost literally lit up. “As long as you take the extra time to work on your comics, you’re off the hook. And what’s more, you’ll be getting your bedroom with your own bed! That’s right, no more having to sleep in that little basket by my bed. You’re getting too big for that sort of thing, so it’s about time that I stopped treating you like a baby and started letting you grow up.” Twilight’s smile turned wistful and she stroked a hoof over Spike’s little phoenix head. “Even if I’ll miss those old days…”

Spike felt Peewee’s body grow warmer than ever as he basked in the stroking and the sweet deal he was getting for a change. He flew up to Twilight and gave her head an enthusiastic hug. “Oh, thank you so much, Twilight!”

Twilight gave another giggle and levitated him back onto the table. “Easy now, don’t celebrate just yet! We still have to get you back in your own body. Now,” she asked, turning to face him and Peewee, “are you two ready to return to your old bodies?”

Spike gave a chirp and a nod.

“I’m gonna miss being in this body,” Peewee responded, “but Spike needs it more than I do. I mean, just imagine trying to write comics in my body!”

“You won’t have to once I’ve given you enough writing lessons!” Twilight said with an enthusiastic beam.

“Uh, yay!” Peewee replied with a not-so-enthusiastic beam.

Twilight took a deep breath so she could get herself into the zone: the “magic zone,” as she so uncreatively called it. “Alright, now just hold still for a minute and everything can go back to normal…or as normal as things get around here at least.” With that, she charged up her horn and readied her spell…but just as she fired it, she felt a pair of claws wrap around her horn and felt the residual magic go haywire. “GAH!”

There was another blinding flash of light…

----------

“Ugh…why is Twilight’s magic always so bright?” Spike griped as he rubbed his hands against his eyes, only stopping when he suddenly realized, “Hey…I have my hands again!” He opened his eyes and sure enough, he was back in his old body again! “Woohoo! Spike the dragon is back, baby!”

“And so is Peewee the phoenix!” Peewee added from the table he was now on. “…Sorry for the trouble I caused in your body.”

“Aw, it’s okay, little buddy!” Spike said as he gave Peewee a hug that felt good to give again with his own arms. “I know you were just trying to have fun and help me out with Rarity. Heck, I probably would’ve done the same if I was in your situation!”

“Really? Even the part where I messed up the bathroom?”

Thankfully, Spike was spared from having to answer that as a series of frantic shouts rudely interrupted the conversation. He and Peewee looked over and saw Owlowiscious flopping on the floor and cursing like someone had taken and eaten his dessert right in front of him, and also turned him into a fish.

“Yeesh, what’s up with Owlowiscious?” Spike had to ask.

“I don’t think I should be hearing the things he’s saying!” Peewee chimed in.

“My goodness…” Everyone turned to face Twilight, who was gazing at her body in an oddly fascinated way. “So this is what it feels like to be Miss Twilight…”

Spike and Peewee stopped dead at that remark. “No way…” they both said.

“Owlowiscious!” the owl on the floor screeched. “What were you thinking?! You should know not to mess with my horn when I’m casting a spell!”

“My apologizes, Miss Twilight,” the alicorn responded, “but I had to make use of the footnote on page 148 of Star Swirl’s Spectacular Spell Soliloquies Vol. 1.”

“You actually remember that footnote?” Twilight felt a tear come to Owlowiscious’s eye at that. “I’m so proud of you...or at least I would be, if you didn’t use it to hijack my body! Why on earth would you do such a thing?!”

“Because I had to teach you an important lesson,” Owlowiscious admonished. “You were willing to brainwash Peewee to make him conform more with what you thought he should be, and that’s simply appalling! Did you ever think to consider how he’d feel about that?! In fact, none of this would have happened to begin with if you hadn’t sunk to that level!”

Twilight froze as that realization sunk in. Doesn’t that just figure? “Okay, I admit, I was out of line,” she said reluctantly. “But does that really justify taking me out of my body?!”

“Not to worry,” he assured him. “If you recall the rest of the footnote, we’ll only be in each others’ bodies for the rest of the day. That should be enough time to get the idea of what you put dear Spike and Peewee through, I believe.”

Twilight groaned and buried Owlowiscous’s head in his wings. “I can’t believe I’m being punished and lectured by my own owl…”

“Don’t worry, Twilight!” Peewee flew up to Twilight and gave the owl body a warm hug. “You won’t have to stay on the floor! I’m make sure you learn how to fly again and be the best owl a pony can be!”

“Oh, joy…”

End of Part 5