Chapter 1
Twilight was probably right. Eggheads like her usually are. Right about what? Oh, yesterday I was helping her get the hang of using those awesome new wings of hers when we found a rock. Well, Twilight said it was a rock. Actually she said it was a calci-something igni-whatsit that was making a deposit, and I had the same look on my face that you’ve got now. Like I said, egghead.
Anyway, Twilight may have called it a rock, but I called it beautiful—not out loud, obviously. Uh, don’t tell anyone I said that, either: I have a reputation to maintain. The point is, there was something about the way it glittered when I looked at it—something magical. And not Twilight’s science-y kind of magic, I’m talking about the kind of magic you just can’t explain. Like Pinkie Pie.
So even though Twilight said it was dumb—she was nicer than that about it, but that’s still what she said—I made a wish. I held that rock in my hooves and looked at it and I wished to be a Won—no, Captain of the Wonderbolts, no matter what it took.
To everyone’s complete surprise, nothing happened.
I was a little disappointed, and Twilight got that smug I-told-you-so look on her face that she gets and got ready for a lecture. What I want to know is why was that box of soap even out in that field in the first place? And why didn’t I notice it earlier? Do you think maybe Twilight brings one with her wherever she goes, just in case? So anyway, Twilight starts going on and on about hard work and responsibility, and I stopped paying attention after about six seconds. I’m already responsible! Would I have been in charge of clearing the clouds away back at the thousandth Summer Sun Celebration if I wasn’t responsible? I don’t think so! What about Winter Wrap Up? An irresponsible pony doesn’t get put in charge of a whole team for five years in a row. As for the hard work, nopony—except A.J.—works harder than me when I’m not napping.
And it’s not like I haven’t been working hard; I’ve been practicing for the Wonderbolts for years. I just—come on! I’m the best flier in all of Equestria! I deserve to be a Wonderbolt now!
I sigh. If wishes were horses, Equestria would be seriously overpopulated. Yeah, I didn’t get it either. Twilight’s been saying some weird stuff since she got her crown back a couple weeks ago. Anyway, Twilight was right about one thing. I’m not going to become a Wonderbolt if I spend all day in bed. I’m going to have to practice. Oh, but today’s Prank Day—a time honored tradition—so practice can wait until Pinkie and me are done pranking. Of course, pranking can wait a little bit longer too. I’ve got just a little more sleep to catch up on first. It’s exhausting being this awesome.
I smile and roll over onto my side, snuggling up against something soft on the bed next to me.
Uh, okay, two things. One, this is not my bed. Two, please be a pillow please be a pillow please be a pillow…
I brace myself and open my eyes. It is just a pillow I’m cuddling with. I let out a sigh of relief. Back to the first thing now. Whose bed is this and why am I in it? Let me think and try to remember what else happened yesterday.
I remember not paying attention to Twilight’s lecture.
I remember making fun of Twilight for lecturing all the time.
I remember Twilight getting upset with me for making fun of her. I ducked that by telling her that it was getting late and I needed to rest up for tomor—uh, today. She asked me what was so important and if I would be practicing instead of talking to rocks about what I want in life. I made some sarcastic comment and told her I was going to spend the morning pranking with Pinkie, then I think I said I’d spend the rest of the day catching up with Tom out by the Mirror Pool.
She didn’t think that was funny. She started lecturing some more about hard work and responsibility and she even threw dedication into the mix that time—told me that if I really wanted something I should spend my time working for it instead of wasting time playing pranks on ponies. Then she really got into it, and when that happens she pays more attention to the lecture than the pony she’s lecturing, so I slipped away unnoticed.
As far as I know, she’s still out there lecturing the grass.
But that doesn’t answer the question of where I am. Okay, so after I ditched Twilight, I went back to my place, ate a snack, and went to bed. I think I dreamed something, but I can’t really remember it now. Then I woke up here. Huh. Maybe if I figure out where ‘here’ is.
I take a look around the room and… it’s… a room. That’s helpful. No, think! Come on, what would Twilight do?
I gasp. I think I just had an apostrophe. You know, I’ve figured it out. Twilight did this! She was mad that I ditched her, and she knew today’s Prank Day, so she got me first!
I sniffle and wipe away an imaginary tear. “I’m so proud of her,” I say. I leave through the window to find her and tell her so. Once I’m outside it’s easy enough to tell that I’m in Las Pegasus. I am seriously impressed she got me all the way here. Still, it won’t take me long to get back to Ponyville. I mean, I am Rainbow Dash.
I glide low over Ponyville. It’s still early, and it doesn’t look like many ponies are awake yet. I grin; Twilight will never expect to see me here this early. Actually, it doesn’t look like anypony’s awake yet. Even Applejack is probably sleeping in since the harvest is finished.
I glance toward Sweet Apple Acres and see fields of apple trees still covered with fruit. “Huh.” I guess I was wrong. Oh well, it’s not like it matters. The important thing here is that Twilight will still be asleep and she’ll never see me coming. I’ll go over there and tell her what a great prank it was and really play it up until she gives in and asks me what I’m going to do to her. I’ll act innocent like I’m not going to do a thing and then I’ll leave. I’ll make sure she sees me and Pinkie hanging around the library pranking other ponies, and she’ll be so sure I’ve done something that she’ll be para—uh—worried for hours! Then, when she doesn’t expect it, BAM!—I punch my forehooves together for emphasis—That’s when I’ll strike.
I’ll check her room first. I fly around the library and hover outside her window so I can see inside. Oh, this is perfect: she’s still sleeping. I can just see the tip of her horn sticking out from under the blanket that’s rising and falling while she breathes.
I have to stifle a laugh to make sure I don’t wake her up and I silently open the window. I’ve kept this window oiled for a long time now just in case I ever needed a sneaky way in or out of the library. I land gently on the windowsill—hardly making any noise—and I take a deep breath. I stop myself just before I yell her name—I have a better idea. I close the window behind my and jump over the bed, spreading out my wings to glide across and land without a sound at the top of the stairs.
For years I’ve carefully crash-landed and been loud wherever I go. Now nopony even knows I can be quiet. Years of work are about to pay off. I smirk. She thinks I’m not dedicated. She’s about to find out just how wrong she is.
I reach forward and carefully bite down on the blanket, then with a sharp twist of my neck I send it sailing to the floor below. Before it even hits the floor I turn back to the bed and yell, “Good morning, Twilight!” with a huge smile on my face.
It’s even better than I hoped for. Twilight screams and rolls away from me, falling to the floor between the bed and the window.
“Hey, Twilight, you okay?” I ask, laughing. Twilight’s quiet and stays hiding behind the bed. This is too good. I am never going to let her live this down.
Twilight pokes her head up over the the side of the bed. Her mane looks ridiculous, she’s as pale as a sheet, and there is real fear in those blue eyes.
Wait. Blue eyes?
“Rarity?” I ask. I stop smiling.
The fear in her eyes fades quickly and is replaced by confusion and—of all things—happiness. “Rainbow Dash?” she asks. “What in Equestria are you doing here?”
Okay, so I’m confused. I wake up in Las Pegasus, the victim of an awesome prank. I come back to tell Twilight she did good. I wake up Rarity who was in Twilight’s bed and instead of being mad she looks as happy as if she’d just found out that Prince Blueblood wasn’t a total jerk anymore and he wanted to see her.
Yeah, I’ve got nothing.
Whoa! While I was thinking, Rarity walked around the bed. Now she’s close enough she could touch me. And she’s about to. I take a step back. “What am I doing here? What are you doing here? Where’s Twilight?”
Rarity stops and lowers her hoof that she had be about to smack—or hug, but I couldn’t take that chance—me with. She doesn’t look happy anymore. Now she looks just as confused as I am. “Twilight? I am insulted! We haven’t spoken in such a long time and the first thing you have to say upon seeing me again is ‘Where’s Twilight?’ ” Rarity sticks her nose up in the air like she’s, well, insulted, I guess.
“What are you talking about? We had a good talk a couple days ago! And of course I was looking for Twilight, that’s why I came here! What were you doing in her bed?” Are they…? My eyes drift back toward the rumpled sheets. No, don’t think about it. That way madness lies.
Rarity gives up her high-nosed insulted look and looks back at me. “Rainbow,” she says slowly, and the look on her face is like she’s not really sure who I am. “If this is supposed to be one of your pranks, it isn’t funny.”
Pranks. I guess she does know who I am. But why does she think I’m pranking her by looking for Twilight in her own home? Why is she just standing there? Why won’t she answer me? Oh, right, I probably need to ask my question out loud.
“Rarity, I’m looking for Twilight in her house. How is that a prank?”
“Darling,” she says, getting that look she gets when she’s explaining something simple to her sister for the millionth time, “this isn’t Twilight’s house anymore. She hasn’t lived here in months, not since—well, we sent you the invitation to her farewell party.”
Farewell party? What farewell party?
Rarity gives a little sigh and looks away. “You know, Pinkie was ever so disappointed that you didn’t attend. The rest of us—” another little sigh. “We told her you were chasing your dream and you wouldn’t come so she shouldn’t get her hopes up, but she was just so sure.” She sighs again—I wish she’d stop doing that. “She convinced us,” Rarity continues, done sighing for now. “How could such a loyal pony not be there for her friends at such an important time? At first we thought you were going to be fashionably late, but that excuse only lasts for so long. We began to think you had forgotten what time it started, but by the time the party was supposed to end the rest of us knew you weren’t coming. Pinkie—”
Rarity sniffles. Is she—is she crying? She looks back at me and I can see that yes, her makeup is starting to run down her cheeks.
“Pinkie wouldn’t give up. She insisted you would be there and we simply needed to give you more time.” This time I see the tear run down Rarity’s cheek. “So that’s what she did, you know. She gave you as much time as she could. The other guests all left. By morning Twilight had to go as well. We tried to convince Pinkie that since Twilight had left, there was no reason for her farewell party to continue, and do you know what she said?”
Rarity looks me right in the eye, and chills run down my spine. I don’t think I want to hear any more of this story. I open my mouth to say so, but Rarity goes on.
“She said, ‘Dashie’s not here yet.’ ”
Ouch. Playing the ‘Dashie’ card. That hurts.
“Fluttershy had to go next. She was sorry, of course, but her animals needed her. I had a feeling I’d be there for a while longer, so I asked her to check on Opal for me. Applejack and I stayed with Pinkie. We took turns sleeping when we couldn’t stay awake anymore, but Pinkie wouldn’t stop.
“It was on my watch that Pinkie finally succumbed to exhaustion. She had just refilled the punch bowl for the twenty-third time when she looked down, stopped smiling, whispered ‘she’s not coming,’ and collapsed. She hit the table, spilling punch all over both of us. I was frightened she was hurt; the punch bowl and several cups had shattered. She was sleeping. Not peacefully, but she was only sleeping. She wasn’t hurt. I mean, she wasn’t injured.” Rarity stops and looks out the window.
I’ve gotta say something. “I—” I sound like a frog.
“The punch was red, did I mention that?” she asks, cutting me off. “Oh yes, bright red. My coat matched Pinkie’s for a few days. Of course, for a few days I didn’t really have a chance to wash up, because she was in no condition to be left alone. At first—after she woke up, of course—she simply stared silently at nothing in particular. She wouldn’t respond to us, almost as though we weren’t there. The only thing she would react to was if somepony tried to take the decorations down. Then she would cry or scream at us until we stopped. Fluttershy only tried that once, of course. After the first time she couldn’t bear to try to clean up again. Applejack, however… Applejack is much more stubborn. Once when Pinkie was screaming, Applejack didn’t stop until Pinkie gave her a black eye. Then she dropped the streamers as quick as could be, all while shouting some very uncouth phrases. Judging by the look on her face things were about to become quite ugly. Applejack stopped when she saw what Pinkie did next.
“Pinkie Pie sat on the floor, ignoring us and focusing only on the streamers Applejack had dropped. She was picking them up ever so carefully, one at a time, and she was crying. Not the loud, screaming cries from before; this was the quiet sobbing of someone who’s fought as hard as she could, but in the end she had to give up. I was afraid it had broken her. Even worse than the surprise party we threw for her birthday that one time, do you remember?”
I remember. Her mane and tail went all straight and she started acting crazy. I had to drag her all the way to the party, and she was fighting the whole way. That’s not something you just forget. After listening to what Rarity’s been saying, though, I can’t seem to even open my mouth, let alone answer her.
Rarity scoffs. I guess she thinks I forgot.
“All at once, she stood up, and with quiet tears streaming down her face she started to clean up.”
Rarity sounds like she’s choking up again. I thought cleaning up was a good thing… at least from her point of view.
“The problem was that with every piece of decoration she threw away, she seemed to get worse. It was as though she was throwing out a piece of herself with every scrap of streamer and shard of glass. I asked her to stop, not expecting her to, but she did. She stopped and she looked at me. What I saw when I looked at her… It tore me apart to see her like that, so I did the only thing I could think of.”
You said that this whole story has been the meanest, worst prank in the entire history of pranks?
“I picked up a streamer and fastened it loosely around her neck and I told her to keep that little piece of the party with her until the next time she saw you. I told her to give you that streamer so that you will have made it to the party after all.
“For the longest time she simply looked at me with that streamer around her neck. I tried desperately to think of something else that might help, but then, slowly, she nodded. She didn’t smile, not even that little sad half-smile that says ‘I’m not okay, but I will be,’ but she nodded, and I took that as a good sign. She didn’t start crying again, not even when we helped her clean up what remained of the party. We all knew she wasn’t okay yet, so we—that is, Fluttershy, Applejack, and myself—we took turns staying with her for another week until she was finally able to give us that sad little half-smile and tell us that she would be okay… someday.
“She—”
“Stop it, Rarity. This isn’t funny.” There’s my voice! It’s about time it came back and put an end to all this crazy talk.
Rarity stiffens and draws a sharp hiss of a breath.
I don’t know how she could think I’d believe it, anyway. Twilight was here yesterday and besides, when Pinkie Pie throws a party I am there!
“Funny?” Rarity asks in a low voice.
It must be more of Twilight’s prank: convince me that I’ve been gone for a long time so that I—so that I what? Forget congratulating her, this prank’s gone south in a hurry. I don’t know how she convinced Rarity to help her with something so… so mean, but I’m going to have a talk with her about what is and what isn’t a good prank. I—
“I tell you about one of the most horrible things you’ve ever done, and you think I’m trying to be funny?” Rarity whips around to face me. Her face is still streaked from where she had been crying before, but there are no hints of any new tears forming. Now she just looks mad. I don’t know what Twilight said to her to convince her to do this, but she is really throwing herself into the part.
“Don’t get me wrong, it’s a moving story, Rares, and if I believed it for a second I’d hate myself for doing that to Pinkie, but there’s just no way it’s true.”
“I—buh—you—” Rarity sputters. It’s actually kinda funny to see, but even I know that this is not a good moment to laugh. Acting or not, I think she’d hit me.
“Not true?” screams Rarity.
I take a step back so I’m now actually on the stairs. Rarity is scary when she’s this mad. At least she doesn’t burst into flames like Twilight. Does she? I don’t want to find out.
“Do you mean to say you don’t believe a word I’ve said to you?”
“Uh, duh.” Smooth, Rainbow. Way to not make her angrier. Quick, explain. “It can’t be true. I was here yesterday teaching Twilight how to fly. How could I have missed her going-away party, not to mention this whole thing with Pinkie that you say lasted for days?” There, that should put an end to this. It’s like Twilight says, ‘you can’t argue with infamous logic,’ whatever that means.
“Months,” Rarity says through gritted teeth. “It has lasted for months. She still hasn’t recovered. You—” She gets a puzzled look on her face. “Did you say yesterday?”
Finally. “Yeah, yesterday. Remember? You came out and yelled at me for crashing into the side of the Boutique, and then when you found out it was Twilight who crashed you told her she was doing good but maybe we should go somewhere where there wasn’t as much stuff to crash into?”
A hint of a smile tugs at Rarity’s lips. Now we’re getting somewhere! She’ll give up any second now.
“Ah, yes, I remember that like it was yesterday.”
It’s about time. Wait, no, her smile’s being replaced by condensation. No, that’s not right. Consolation? Whatever, you know what I mean.
“But just because I can remember it like it was yesterday,”
Oh, come on, already!
“—that doesn’t mean that it was yesterday.”
Gah! Come on, think! What can I do to get her to give up on this? I have to prove I know it’s not true, but—
“Come to think of it,” Rarity says, “that’s the last day I remember you acting like your old self.” She’s looking away from me, and there’s something about how she’s talking that I’m not totally sure she’s even talking to me anymore. Wait, what did she mean by
“My old self?”
“Yes,” Rarity says, nodding. “Back when we were still friends. Before you left.”
Woah. Time-out. I don’t know who she thinks she’s talking to, but Rainbow Dash does not leave her friends. I’m, like, loyalty in pony form, and I’ve got the Element to prove it. I am so done with this. “That’s it, I’m finding Twilight.” I head for the bedroom door.
“But she’s—” Aaand I’m not listening.
I open the door. “Twilight!” I listen… nothing. Not sure why I expected her to answer me. She’s obviously hiding. I go the rest of the way downstairs. “Twilight! Answer me!” I listen, but all I can hear is the sound of Rarity following me down the stairs.
That’s it, she asked for it. I take a deep breath. I’m gonna break some eardrums, and maybe a window or two. “TWILIGHT SPARKLE!” The windows shake a little, but none of them break.
Rarity stops next to me and rubs her ears. “Rainbow Dash, what—ah!—is the matter with you? I told you—ow!—Twilight’s not here!”
“No, you know what? I’m done talking to you. I’m going to go talk to somepony who knows better than to go along with a prank like this!”
I think Rarity’s saying something else behind me, but I don’t care. I’m flying past the books and her sewing supplies and out the door to go find Fluttershy.
I’m knocking on Fluttershy’s front door before I even land. I’m knocking maybe a little harder and faster than I really need to, but I need somepony to tell me that Rarity’s talking crazy. Not that I think she’s telling the truth or anything, but it’d be nice to have somepony on my side. I keep knocking. Come on, Fluttershy, what’s taking so long?
The door opens and I almost lose my balance. Maybe I was knocking just a little too hard. But on the other hoof, it worked. Fluttershy’s… not here. I look around, and she’s nowhere to be seen. She isn’t standing inside like you’d think she would be after opening the door. It must have opened by itself. Spooky.
A tiny throat clears somewhere below me, so I look down.
“Oh, it’s you,” I say to Angel while he glares back at me. In case you haven’t noticed, we don’t really like each other much. He thinks I’m a bad influence on Fluttershy, and I know he is.
He taps his foot impatiently, and I can just imagine him saying, ‘What do you want? Come on, out with it, you oversized featherbrain! My time’s valuable!’
Okay, so maybe I’m reading a little into it, but I’m sure that’s what he’s thinking.
He keeps tapping his foot. ‘I’m not getting any younger!’ Come to think of it, he is showing his age a little bit.
“Where’s Fluttershy?” No pleasantries. The two of us are way past the point where those would be anything but insulting.
Angel nods slowly and makes a big show of thinking it over. ‘I thought so, now if I could only remember where she is…’
I ready an appropriate insult for the stubborn little fluffball but he gestures for me to lean down closer before I do. What the hay, I’ll humor him. I lean down a little.
‘Come closer,’ he gestures.
I do.
‘Come more closer,’ he gestures.
I sigh, roll my eyes, and then I do. With our noses less than an inch apart, I raise an eyebrow at him, daring him to try telling me to come even closer.
I guess I’m close enough now, because Angel smiles, puts one paw up to his lips, then turns around to hop inside with a wave for me to follow him. Yeah, being so close to the ground may be fine for him, but I’m stand—
“Ow! Hey!” That pain-in-the-neck rabbit just kicked me in the nose! I glare and take a step forward just in time for him to slam the door in my face, hitting me in the nose again. In pain, I yell something that would make Princess Celestia blush. I should know, because one time I said it in front of her, and she blushed. So did Princess Luna. And Princess Cadance. And Twilight, and Rarity, and Applejack, and Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy, and the royal guards, and the crowd— There were a lot of ponies there, and every single one of them blushed. Even that one pony who smiled and nodded at me like, ‘that mare knows what’s up,’ and that was kinda creepy. I mean, I might say stuff like this sometimes, but I don’t mean it literally. I think that pony meant it.
Behind me there’s a familiar “eep!” and I turn around to see Fluttershy standing there blushing brightly. She must have heard what I said.
“Hey—”
“Rainbow Dash!” Fluttershy launches herself at me faster than a… than a… well, than a Rainbow Dash from a catapult, and the next thing I know I can’t see anything but pink and yellow, and I’m finding it hard to breathe.
The pressure around my neck gets stronger. I can’t remember, was she angry when she said my name a second ago? She must have been, because now I think she’s trying to kill me. You don’t try to kill somepony unless you’re really angry at them, right? If only I knew what I did, then I could apologize for it.
I’m really tired all of a sudden. I guess apologizing can wait… until… after…
I wake up coughing. I’m lying on something soft. It must be Fluttershy’s couch, because I’m in her living room. It looks like she’s done some rearranging since I was here a few days ago. No sign of the rabbit, now where’s… Ah, there’s Fluttershy right next to me, holding a glass of water. I think she’s saying something. I can’t quite hear her but judging by the look on her face it’s probably ‘I’m so sorry,’ over and over again.
I sit up and take the glass of water. Fluttershy looks really happy about that. Like, a lot happier than anypony should look about a guest accepting a drink. Of course, I guess she could just be happy that I’m okay, more or less. I drink the water. I choke a little about halfway through, but I don’t set the glass down until it’s empty. Now then, “What’s with you? Are you trying to kill me?”
Fluttershy flinches as if I just hit her and I already wish I’d picked my words more carefully. More democratically, as Twilight might say. Deplorably? No, that doesn’t sound right either.
“I’m sorry,” she says. “I just never thought I’d see you again—” Her voice gets quieter. “—after what you said—” She drops her voice even softer. “—last time,” she finishes in a whisper.
“What?” I can’t think of anything I said last time that would make Fluttershy think I wouldn’t come back. “What did I say last time? What are you talking about?”
“You said that spending time with a w—”
I hovered in midair outside Fluttershy’s cottage. Below me, Fluttershy stood in the open doorway, looking disappointed. Tank hovered next to her, looking heartbroken.
“Look, it’s nothing personal,” I said. “It’s just that I’ll never get into the Wonderbolts if I spend all my time hanging out with weak fliers like you two.”
“I—” Fluttershy’s voice shook. “I understand. It’s your dream and you have to m-make p-priorities.” She pressed her lips together and squinted a little like she was trying very, very hard not to cry.
“Yep. I’d say ‘see ya,’ but I probably won’t, so goodbye, Fluttershy. Bye, Tank.” I turned around and flew away.
“G-Goodb-bye, R-Rainbow D—” Fluttershy’s voice broke apart into sobs behind me.
I didn’t turn back.
“…all the tickets you sent me but I knew you didn’t really want me there, so I never went. Sometimes I could see you from the ground, especially when you did a Sonic Rainboom, and I cheered for you. I know you couldn’t hear me, but I cheered anyway. I hope that’s okay.”
I stare at Fluttershy with my mouth hanging open. What just happened? Was that… a memory? But… I didn’t… I wouldn’t! I would never do something like that, and if a friend needed me, I’d be there for her… right? If what I just remembered really happened, then what Rarity said about
“Twilight’s farewell party?”
Fluttershy looks at the floor. “You didn’t show up,” she says quietly. “Just like Applejack’s wedding.”
Applejack’s what? I’ve gotta get out of here, I’m sorry. I’m not sure if I said that last part out loud or not, but I’m already outside flying toward Sweet Apple Acres.
“I’m sorry!” I yell back toward Fluttershy.
I really hope she heard me.
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it can’t be true.
It’s become my mantra as I fly slowly over the apple trees in search of Applejack. I have to fly slow because the leaves are too thick for me to see her, and if I fly too fast the wind will be too loud for me to hear her.
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it can’t be true.
Sweet Apple Acres is huge. Searching it like this is giving me way too much time to think.
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it might be true.
No! It isn’t true. I wouldn’t do those things.
I remember what I said to Fluttershy.
I didn’t say that! I would never say that. My friends are more important to me than anything. Twilight just made me remember something that never happened as part of her sick, twisted prank. She can do that, right?
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it can’t be true.
More important than anything except joining the Wonderbolts.
More important than anything including joining the Wonderbolts.
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it might be true.
I wished to be Captain of the Wonderbolts, no matter what.
I’m not a Wonderbolt.
Fluttershy said I sent her tickets.
Those could have been for anything!
She said she watched me from the ground, especially when I did a Sonic Rainboom. What else could it be?
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it can’t be true.
Competitive cloud-clearing?
It’s true.
No, no, no!
I shut my eyes as if that will shut out the argument in my head.
To my great surprise, it works.
I come to at the base of an apple tree. I open my eyes and see a blurry pony’s face in front of me.
“Applejack?” I ask with a groan. Of pain. I’m not groaning because I saw Applejack, it’s because I crashed into a tree.
“Nope!” the pony says with a laugh. She sounds an awful lot like Applejack. “But you’re real close!” She steps back, I guess to let me see her better.
It doesn’t help much; my vision is still too blurry. I close my eyes, shake my head, and then blink a few times, and that helps me to see a little better. The pony standing in front of me has a yellowish coat, red mane and tail, and a hammer cutie mark.
“Uh… I’ve got nothin’.”
She gives me a disapproving look. “Rainbow Dash, it hasn’t been that long since you’ve seen me! How could you forget me after all the time you spent helpin’ me earn my cutie mark?”
By Celestia’s Flowing Beard That She Cuts Off Every Morning, I know who this pony is.
She looks concerned. “Unless you hit your head harder than I thought just now. Do you need to go to the hospital?”
I shake my head and ignore the bright spots of light. “Apple Bloom?”
“I knew you wouldn’t forget me!” She grins.
“You’ve got a hammer on your butt,” I point out.
Now she looks even happier. “Yeah! Turns out my special talent’s buildin’ stuff! Who knew?”
“But… your name’s Apple Bloom. What does that have to do with a hammer?”
“Not everypony gets a cutie mark that matches their name! Why, just look at Pinkie Pie! What’s that got to do with balloons?”
Pinkie Pie. Balloons. Parties. Twilight’s farewell party. It can’t be true. I’ve gotta find Applejack.
I stand up as quick as I can. “Hey, it’s been great, um, seeing you, but I really need to find Applejack. Can you point me in the right direction?”
“Oh, sure. She’s inside, tendin’ to the young’un.”
“I thought you were the young’un.”
She laughs. “Not anymore, now that title goes to my nephew!”
Nephew? Applejack has a son? She’s married and she has a son? “Oh. Okay. Well, thanks. See ya.” I take to the air to find the farmhouse.
“Anytime,” Apple Bloom calls out from the ground below. “Oh! Congratulations for reaching your dream!”
I almost crash again when I hear that.
It can’t be true, it can’t be true, it must be true.
The Apple Family Farmhouse’s front door never has been good at keeping me out. It’s also never been good about opening without making a lot of noise. Today no one hears the door over me.
“Applejack!” I yell as soon as there’s a crack between the door and its frame. I yell her name again as soon as I get inside.
“Hush up in there,” Applejack says from the next room. A couple seconds go by and she walks through the door. “I just got the baby to sleep. Now what’s all the—” She sees me and her jaw drops. So does mine.
Out of everypony I’ve seen today, except for Apple Bloom (if that really was Apple Bloom), Applejack looks the most… um… different. I mean, Fluttershy was normal, and Rarity looked the same except for a major case of bedhead, but Applejack… She’s got bags under her bloodshot eyes, she’s put on weight—she’s no Mrs. Cake, but she’s getting there—and what happened to her hat?
Applejack finds her voice first. “Rainbow Dash? Is it really you?”
“Where’s your hat?” Somehow, this seems like the most important question.
“In the crib,” she says in a tone that means I should have known that already. She gasps softly. “Oh, that’s right, you haven’t met him yet. Come on.” She tilts her head toward the room she just came from. “Just keep it down. Like I said, he’s sleepin’.” She walks back into the next room and I don’t follow her.
I don’t follow her because in that room is one of two things. If I go in there and find Twilight laughing about her big prank, then I’m going to hit her, and hug her, and tell her to never ever do anything like this ever again. I might even— But if I go in that room and Twilight’s not in there… If all I find in there is a little colt with a hat in his crib, then I’ll have to admit to myself that this isn’t a prank. And if this isn’t a prank, then the stuff that they told me—and what I remember saying to Fluttershy—must be true. And then I’ll definitely—
I don’t follow her because I’m afraid.
Applejack comes back into the room. She must have realized I wasn’t going to follow her. She comes over to stand next to me and lays a hoof on my withers. “Ain’t nothin’ to be nervous about.”
Oh, yes, there is.
“I swear, some ponies are tough as can be, then you try to get them to meet your baby and they’re like a little filly on her first day at a new school. Come on.” She gives me a little push. Gentle, but firm. The kind of push that says: ‘I’m asking you this time, but next time I’m telling you.’ A real mother’s ‘suggestion.’
I walk into the room.
There’s a crib.
Inside the crib…
Inside is Applejack’s son. I take one look at him and I know he can’t be anyone else’s. He looks so much like her that it seems wrong for him not to be wearing the hat instead of cuddling with it. I pick up one hoof and reach into the crib as if touching him will brush away the illusion, putting my life back to normal.
He’s real. I can feel every little breath, every beat of his tiny heart. He is so very real. A lock of his mane has fallen over his face, so I reach up and brush it back into place before I take my hoof out of his crib. He gives a little sigh and squeezes his mother’s hat a little tighter. My heart is doing strange things to me right now.
Applejack’s next to me, watching me.
“He’s perfect,” I whisper to her. “Congratulations, A.J.”
“Yeah,” she whispers back, smiling at her son. “Thank you, Sugarcube.”
We stand together in silence for a few seconds, watching her son sleep, before she says something else. “Hey, congratulations yourself.”
“For what?” I ask, not really paying attention.
“Your big news! Everypony has dreams, but most ponies give up on ‘em. You stuck with it and made yours come true. I’m right proud of ya.”
No. Change the subject.
“Do you have, uh—” I clear my throat quietly. “—any pictures of the wedding I missed? I’d love to see ‘em.”
This isn’t much better, but Applejack smiles and leads me into the kitchen where she gets a photo album down from a shelf. She gives it to me and I open it. On the first page is a
I held the envelope for a moment, just looking at it. I couldn’t remember ever getting mail from Applejack before. To be honest, I wasn’t even sure she could write. For a second I thought about tossing it out unopened, but curiosity got the better of me and I decided to find out what it said. There was an invitation inside.
“Blah, blah, blah… pleased to announce… wedding of Applejack and… to be held on the fifteenth of… hmm.” I finished reading the invitation and tossed it onto the bed with the envelope so I could slip out of my flight suit. I carried the flight suit to the dirty clothes basket, wrinkling my nose in disgust—that thing was ripe. I was so glad Wonderbolts had somepony else to clean our laundry for us so I wouldn’t have to do it myself.
I glanced at my performance schedule and saw a show scheduled for the day of Applejack’s wedding. I scribbled a quick note for two tickets to the show that day, then I put that—along with the invitation and an autographed picture of me—on top of my flight suit. Somepony would take care of it. There was no way I could go if I wanted to: they’d never make a pony captain if she couldn’t even make it to the shows.
“…and here’s Twilight and her brother. Just look at how much shorter she was back then! Over here we—”
“I’m a Wonderbolt?” I need to hear it—really hear it—from somepony else.
Applejack looks up at me from the photos. “You sure are.” She leans toward me, and she looks kinda worried. “Are you okay, Sugarcube?”
I shake my head. “No, I… I need to take a walk and clear my head.” I stand up and head for the door. “I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Okay,” Applejack says. “You’re welcome here anytime—always have been.”
As I walk into town I tell myself I don’t really know where I’m going or why I’m going there, but it’s a lie. I’m going to Sugarcube Corner, and I’m going to find Pinkie Pie. I attract some attention on my way. I guess it’s not every day that a Wonderbolt walks through Ponyville. For crying out loud, I just found out I’m a Wonderbolt! Why doesn’t that make me happy?
Probably because of what it must have taken to get to where I am. The things I’ve said, the things I’ve done. The ponies I’ve hurt and… abandoned.
Sugarcube Corner isn’t very busy yet. Despite everything that’s happened today, it’s not even noon. Most ponies wait until after lunch before going to the pastry shop. There’s only one pony at the counter, blocking my view of Pin— of Mrs. Cake. She looks happy to see me and terrified of me at the same time.
I know how she feels.
The one customer leaves, taking with him my only excuse for waiting. I go up to the counter to ask Mrs. Cake where Pinkie is, but she doesn’t give me the chance.
“Just a moment, dear. I need to take care of something in the kitchen.” Before I can say anything, she leaves me alone at the counter.
I wait. Have you ever noticed how weird time is? Sometimes it goes by so fast and other times it feels like it isn’t moving at all. It seems like Mrs. Cake has been gone for hours. I turn to leave and take a couple steps toward the door.
“Hi, Dashie.”
I freeze. I know without even turning around that this is not the Pinkie Pie I remember. There is no smile in her voice.
“I have something for you.”
I turn and look. Pinkie is standing on this side of the counter. She must have been baking: her coat is spotted with flour and her mane and tail are tied back, looking just like Applejack’s, only pink. I already knew what she’s doing now without looking, but I can’t help but watch while she carefully takes off a tattered loop of paper from around her neck. She holds it out to me.
“I saved you a piece of Twilight’s farewell party so you wouldn’t miss it.” It sounds like she’s recited that hundreds of times so she’d get it right when she got the chance to say it to me.
Everything, even my breathing, is shaking as I reach out and take the streamer necklace. “Thank you, Pinkie. I—”
She picks something up off of the counter behind her and holds it out to me. It’s a cupcake decorated with all the colors of my mane and the words ‘Farewell Twilight.’ “And I baked one of these for you every day so you’d have a fresh one when you got here.”
“I—” I put on the streamer necklace and take the cupcake. Is it just me or is it getting hard to see? She’s just standing there waiting, I have to say something. “Thank you so much, Pinkie. I love the party. I just wish I’d gotten here sooner.”
Pinkie stares at me like she has no idea what to say. Finally she nods. She doesn’t smile.
Pinkie isn’t laughing and it’s my fault. Pinkie isn’t smiling and it’s my fault. My friend is hurting and it’s my fault! I have to fix this. What do I do what do I do what do I do?
“Hey, Pinkie, um, what do you say we go out pranking, huh? Or-or we could go have a party, just the two of us, right now. What do you think?”
It takes a second, but Pinkie’s eyes light up. She smiles. “I’d like that!”
The bell on the door behind me jingles. Pinkie glances past me to see who’s come in. I couldn’t care less.
Pinkie’s smile disappears and she looks at the floor. “But you won’t,” she says.
“What? Of course I will!”
Pinkie shakes her head. “No, you’re going to leave again.”
“Why—”
A voice speaks up behind me. A voice I know very well. “There you are, Rainb—”
Spitfire stood on the ground below me, telling me to train harder.
I trained harder.
Spitfire flew in front of me, telling me to fly faster.
I flew faster.
Spitfire flew beside me, telling me to turn sharper.
I turned sharper.
Spitfire stood in front of us, telling us that the newest captain of the Wonderbolts should celebrate.
I celebrated.
“…home the day after you make Captain to put it all in perspective for you, right? It sure worked for me.”
Pinkie stands in front of me, staring at the floor. Behind me, Spitfire keeps talking.
“I told your team that you were sleeping in, but we need to get back so you can get ready for tonight. Come on, sleepyhead,” she chuckles, “it’s time to wake up.”
Wake up? Wake up! That’s it! All morning ponies have been telling me that this is my dream and-and sometimes that happens in my dreams, and when it does, somepony always tells me-tells me to wake up, and when I ask them if it’s a dream, then I wake up! So-so all I have to do is ask Spitfire if this is a dream, and then I’ll wake up! I’ll wake up and everything will be back to normal and Pinkie will be okay and we can go pranking just like I promised!
Here goes. I turn to Spitfire. I can’t help but smile. “Is this a dream?” There! I said the magic words, now I’ll wake up any—
Spitfire punches me in the shoulder. “You bet it is! Captain of the Wonderbolts! That’s a dream for thousands of ponies across Equestria! The difference between us and them is that we made our dreams come true!” She smiles at me.
I stop smiling. I didn’t wake up. I was supposed to wake up! That was the deal! I ask her if this is a dream and then I wake up! I’m not supposed to still be here! If I’m still here then that means that this… isn’t… a dream…
Spitfire takes a step closer to me and lowers her voice. “Listen, I don’t want to be a hard-flank about this, but the team needs a captain it can count on. They need you today. They need you right now.” She sighs. “Look, it’s down to this: you come back with me now, or you don’t come back at all, and the last few years of your life will have been a waste. We can come up with a story for the papers, if that’s your choice. We can say you got sick or there was a family emergency and you decided to step down—whatever you want to say. But you need to make a choice, and you need to make it now.”
So this is it. It’s not a prank. It’s not a dream. Spitfire’s in front of me, waiting for me to make up my mind, and Pinkie’s standing behind me, sure that I already have.
I look at Spitfire, who’s trying to be understanding. I can go with her right now and live the dream I’ve had for longer than I can remember.
I look back at Pinkie, who hasn’t moved since Spitfire came in. I can stay here and give up my dreams for good.
Listen, it’s been… uh…. nice, I guess, having someone with me while I go through this today, but could you please leave now?
I don’t want anyone to see me cry.