"Hey, hot shot! You know me, right? Of course you do! Who doesn't know of the amazing Eddy? So, anyways...I had this great scam all figured out, right? It was the best scam ever, I tell ya! But then something went wrong - probably monobrow's fault, as usual - and now we're stuck in this weirdo land with these even weirder talking rainbow-coloured horses. Great. Still, I guess it's not all bad. New people - or ponies, whatever - means new suckers to fleece, and more money for me! Hey, don't look at me like that! I'm just looking out for my friends, that's all - who says I can't make a little money on the side, eh? Besides, sockhead will probably figure out a way to get us home in no time! What's the worst that could happen before then, huh?"
(Crossover with Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy. In the canon of this story, the events of Season 3 of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic have never happened. The events of Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy's Big Picture Show have never happened, either.)
The bright, shining rays of the morning sun cast a soft, warm glow over the wide expanse of woodland known as the Everfree Forest, giving the enchanted location a calming and ethereal appearance.
However, the peaceful silence of the area was soon interrupted by the squelching of shoes pressing down on dew-soaked grass, a trio of bipedal creatures lumbering groggily through the forest.
One towered over his peers with skin a bright yellow and hair shaped into a short buzz-cut, his torso dressed in a white-and-red striped shirt lying below a mottled green jacket with baggy blue shorts clothing his lower regions. As he walked, he stared into the distance with a glazed look in his eye, his vacant expression belying the absence of any meaningful thoughts in his mind.
One was garbed in a red shirt and purple shorts, his legs clothed with long red socks ending in cyan shoes and his head adorned by a black ski hat. He carried himself with an air of authority, and bore a thoughtful look on his face as he glanced around at the various flora around him while simultaneously avoiding as much of the filth from the forest floor as he could.
Lastly, one was outfitted in a yellow polo shirt with a red stripe to one side, a wallet chain hanging out of the pocket of his light-blue pants and a triad of thick, curved hairs protruding from his head. His face was contorted into an irritated grimace, and he moved along with his back hunched over and his hands tucked deeply into his pockets.
Though the three of them caused much clamour with their movements, communication in the group was being kept to a minimum, and the trio carried on their way in relative silence. Suddenly, the smallest member of the trio grunted in annoyance, and spoke aloud as he shoved the tallest of the group to one side.
“Watch it, numbskull! You almost stepped on my foot!”
The one clad in green flinched at this, before offering an apologetic grin, “Sorry, Eddy!”
“Oh, you’re gonna be sorry in a minute-”
“Gentleman, please! Calm yourselves!” the cap-donning one protested, “Squabbling over trivial matters such as these isn’t going to help our situation in the slightest!”
Eddy quickly spun around and switched the target of his verbal tirade. “Can it, Sockhead! This is all your fault, anyways!”
Double D recoiled at this, arching an eyebrow as he did so, “I beg your pardon?! Excuse me, Eddy, but if I recall correctly I wasn’t the one whose latest ill-conceived cash-grabbing scheme enraged the kids of the Cul-de-sac to the extent of us having to flee into the forest to avoid their infuriated wrath!”
Eddy growled and shook his head. “It was the greatest scam ever! But lucky me, I get to be stuck with a couple of bozos who wouldn’t know how to run a good scam if it bit ‘em in the backside!”
“What?! Why, in all my days I never thought that I would hear such repulsive accusations from anyone – and most certainly not from one of my dearest friends!”
“Oh, yeah? Well, I-”
Their verbal sparring was cut short by the sudden onset of an ungodly noise, the intense and raucous din of it permeating the air for miles around, leaving a chilling and deathly silence in its wake. Eddy and Double D froze and simply looked at each other, eyes wide, for a few uncomfortable moments, before the bizarre and disquieting sound repeated itself again. As it did so, they soon realised the source of the sound was unnervingly close, and they both apprehensively turned to face it’s source.
Ed was gently patting his belly with a curious look on his face, and after a few moments he turned to his friends with a lopsided grin, “Uh, guys? I think I’m hungry.”
Eddy groaned and shook his head, while Double D tried his hardest not to laugh.
“Jeez, Lumpy! Don’t scare me like that. You almost gave me a heart attack!” Eddy berated his friend, before sighing and setting off again. “Come on, guys. Let’s go find some food.”
Ed bounced up and down on the spot excitedly for a few moments, before quickly following after Eddy, “Oh boy, oh boy! Yummy yummy for Ed’s tummy!”
Double D smiled and shook his head, watching his friends engage in playful banter as they set off once more. As he watched them go, he wistfully began to recall how they’d ended up in this odd situation in the first place – however, it wasn’t long before he was snapped out of his reverie by the sound of Eddy’s voice.
“Hey, Sockhead! What are you waiting for, an invitation? Let’s go, this food ain’t gonna find itself!”
With this, Double D quickly set off after his companions, slipping into a steady jog so as not to get left behind.
“Really, Eddy? Are you sure this is going to work? If I’m perfectly honest with you, I have my fair share of doubts about this. The other kids are sure to see through this charade!”
“Ah, you worry too much, Sockhead! I’m telling you, this is flawless! The scam to end all scams! Once we pull this off, we’ll be rolling in dough! We’ll be slurping jawbreakers for the rest of our days!”
“Yeah, Double D! Without good dough, how can you make a good pizza?” Ed chimed in.
Eddy and Double D just stared at Ed for a few moments, before looking at each other and shrugging. Turning back to the matter at hand, they gazed up at the large wooden sign proudly proclaiming “Triple-E Go-Karting Extravaganza”, the lettering still wet from being freshly painted on by Ed. He soon joined his friends, and together they looked at the results of their hard work laid out before them on Ed’s drive.
“I’m telling you, Double D, it’s in the bag! I’ve been planning this scam for weeks now, and there’s no way it could go wrong! It’s foolproof, I tell ya!” Eddy explained, cheerfully clasping a hand on Double D’s back.
Double D jolted at this and turned to Eddy with an arched eyebrow, but soon broke into a good-natured smile at his friend’s enthusiasm. “You know, Eddy...normally I’d be feeling a bit apprehensive about this whole ordeal. However, I think you may be onto something this time. This one could be a winner.”
Eddy grinned and turned back to face the sign, “That’s the spirit! Now, let’s get this operation rolling before any of the other kids show u-”
“Guys, look! Here they come!” Ed shouted.
Eddy suddenly turned to his friends with a panicked look in his eyes, and made an ushering movement with his hands. “Quick! Hurry it up, move into position! Let’s go, let’s go!”
The three of them scrambled into their positions, with Ed taking his respective place on the track by the go-kart while Double D and Eddy stood at the counter, watching as their prospective customers rapidly approached. Though he would have admitted that he was somewhat nervous, Double D couldn’t help but smile. Maybe Eddy was right, after all. This scam couldn’t possibly fail.
“Come on, Eddy! Please?” Ed whined.
“I said ‘no’, Ed!” Eddy retorted.
“Aw, come on, Eddy! Please please please please please-”
“ALRIGHT, ALREADY!” Eddy yelled. After a few moments of silence, he sighed and began “I spy, with my little eye, something that begins with…L.”
Ed quickly began glancing around, and excitedly pointed to a rotting piece of foliage lying in a thicket close by.
“Oh! Oh! Is it a log, Eddy?” he suggested.
“Nope! Guess again!” Eddy smirked.
Ed paused and looked thoughtful for a moment, before gasping excitedly and pointing to a nearby tree.
“Oh, I know! It’s a leaf!” Ed clapped his hands.
“Guess again, Ed!” Eddy said, grinning.
“Could you give me a hint? Is it…bigger than a breadbox?”
“Ah-ah-ah! No hints!”
“Aw, but Eddy…!”
Double D chuckled softly as he watched Ed and Eddy continue with their game of “I-Spy”. The trio had to have been walking for at least a good hour now, and they still had yet to come across any substance that Double D would have been able to regard as safely edible (or at the very least, any that would provide decent nourishment). Still, he was thankful that his companions had resorted to playing harmless games such as these rather than launching a barrage of irritating mock-insults at one another like they usually did.
“Okay, I give! What is it, Eddy? Come on, tell me!” Ed begged.
“Alright, here it is! The answer is…a lump!” Eddy proclaimed, pointing at Ed and laughing.
Double D sighed and shook his head. Of course…
Ed looked confused for a moment, before his face contorted into a scowl and he turned away, folding his arms with an indignant grunt.
“Not funny, Eddy,” he said, before he started walking away.
Eddy looked crestfallen and groaned, “What? It was just a joke, Lumpy! Jeez!”
When Ed didn’t respond, Eddy turned to Double D, “Come on, Sockhead! Help me out here!”
Double D just rolled his eyes and glanced at an oddly-coloured plant a few feet away. “One reaps what one sows, Eddy,” he flatly replied.
Eddy sighed and facepalmed, but before he had a chance to retort he was interrupted by Ed shouting and pointing at something nearby.
“Hey, guys! Come look at this!”
Eddy and Double D quickly rushed over to join their friend, and soon saw what Ed was so ecstatic about. Amidst the seemingly endless cluster of trees in the forest was a worn, earthen path leading both east and west in a fairly straight line. Double D clapped his hands together and turned to Ed with an elated grin.
“Bravo, Ed!” he exclaimed happily, “If we follow this path, we’ll surely trace our way back to some form of civilisation in no time!”
Eddy started to grin, then paused and turned to give Double D a dubious glance, “Oh, yeah? What makes you so sure they ain’t gonna be a bunch of savages, huh?”
Double D calmly pointed to the faint trail of hoofprints leading in both directions that had been worn into the path.
“By the looks of things, they seem to use horses as a form of transport, so I would expect some fair degree of civility from them. Curiously, however, the hoofprints do seem to be a little smaller than one would expect from a horse…in fact, they seem to be the size of a pony’s, more than anything,” he peered at the hoofprints with a thoughtful look for a few moments, before shaking his head and continuing, “In any case, following these is likely our best chance of finding some form of civilisation…and hopefully, some food with it.”
Ed began to drool at the prospect of finding food, while Eddy simply nodded at Double D.
“Alright, Sockhead. But…which way do we go? I don’t wanna end up getting stuck in these woods again.”
The three of them walked forwards and stepped on to the path, and Double D carefully glanced in both directions with a firm gaze. After a few moments, he pointed to the west.
“There. The trees seem to start thinning out in that direction, which means we’ll be heading out of the forest rather than back into it.”
Eddy clasped his hands together, satisfied. “Great! Then let’s get moving!”
The three of them set off down the path, this time traversing in relative silence once again. Though they wouldn’t have admitted it to one another, all three were feeling apprehensive about what kind of civilisation may have been waiting for them at the end of the path – and whether or not its inhabitants were hostile. After a few minutes of travel, the trees came to an abrupt halt, breaking off into an open field. The path itself continued for several yards more, winding along as it led towards a small garden that surrounded an elegant, almost fairytale-like cottage. The Eds stood at the edge of the forest, gazing upon the sight of the cottage bathed in the morning sunlight in silence. Eventually, Double D spoke.
“Behold, gentlemen! Civilisation!” he proclaimed triumphantly, gesturing to the cottage with a wide grin.
“That’s it?!” Eddy groaned, “I was expecting a city, or some houses, or something. Not a cottage in the middle of nowhere!”
Double D’s grin faded. He sighed and facepalmed, before turning to Eddy with a look of annoyance.
“Really? That’s all you have to say? We have clear proof of another living being…one who could potentially offer us nourishment, a place to stay, and advice on how to find our way home…and all you can think to do is criticise?”
Eddy growled, but before he could think of a response Ed interrupted with an excited gasp.
“Guys, look! They have chickens here!”
Eddy and Double D turned to look towards the cottage to see for themselves – and as they did so, they noticed the back door of the cottage slowly opening.
“Quick, someone’s coming! Get down, get down!” Double D hissed in a hushed whisper, the three of them fleeing the path and diving into a nearby bush.
“What was that for, Double D?” Eddy groaned.
“We still haven’t determined whether or not the inhabitants of this cottage are non-hostile, Eddy. One of us should probably go first and establish whether or not these people are safe.”
“Are you kidding me?! A minute ago you were talking about ‘em as if they were the best thing since sliced bread, and now you’re telling me they could be dangerous? Gimme a break here, Double D!”
“I’m just exercising caution, Eddy! Would you rather we charge in there unprepared and place ourselves into potentially hostile territory, or ensure that the people we’re dealing with are safe and hospitable folks?”
“Uh…guys?” Ed interrupted, “Horses don’t usually have wings, right?”
Double D turned to Ed with a tired look, “Of course not, Ed. A horse with wings would be a pegasus, a creature from Greek mythology. If there ever was such a thing as a living pegasus – which I sincerely doubt, mind you – they would be long-extinct by now.”
Ed pointed towards the garden, “Then…what’s that, Double D?”
They all turned to look where Ed was pointing, and Double D’s mouth fell agape. There, right before his eyes, he could see a pegasus with pale yellow fur and a long, flowing pale rose mane and tail slowly approaching the chicken coop.
“Oh, dear lord…” he breathed quietly, “Is that a living…breathing…pegasus?”
Eddy tried to comment, but the only sound that managed to escape his lips was a strained wheeze.
They all continued to watch in awestruck silence, but once the pegasus reached the chicken coop Ed suddenly recoiled in fear.
“Wait! What if it’s trying to attack the chickens?!” he exclaimed. Panicking, he leapt out of the bushes and charged at the pegasus, while Eddy and Double D’s eyes widened in sheer horror.
“NO, ED!” they cried, but it was too late. Ed barrelled towards the pegasus at an unrelenting pace, screaming at the top of his lungs all the while.
“AWAY WITH YOU, MUTANT HORSE!” he yelled, “UNHAND THOSE CHICKENS!”
The pegasus turned towards Ed in surprise, eyes wide with fear; it instinctively took a step back and flattened its ears against its head, before letting out a shriek of pure terror.
Then it galloped away from its aggressor as fast it could.
Fluttershy awoke with a soft, quiet yawn, her eyes slowly opening as the sunlight streaming in from the nearby window gently washed over the entirety of her bedroom. Slowly raising herself into a sitting position, she tenderly unfurled her wings and cricked her back as she threw the bedsheets forwards and off her body, before carefully leaping off the bed while stifling another yawn.
After blinking a few times to reorient herself, she shook her head and made her way downstairs; heading over to the kitchen, she flew up to the cupboard and opened the door, pulling out a box of food pellets. Carrying it in her hooves, she flew over to the centre of the room and tore open the lid, before pouring the food out onto the carpet in the middle of the room as she called out to her animal friends.
“Breakfast time, everyone! Who's hungry?”
All of the animals quickly climbed out of their respective homes that lined the edges of the room, and leapt on the pile of food with great gusto. Fluttershy giggled softly at their enthusiasm, satisfied that her animal friends were well-nourished. As she returned to carefully place the half-empty box back in the cupboard, she felt a faint tugging sensation on her tail. She looked down to see Angel staring up at her, eyebrow raised and tapping his foot expectantly. Fluttershy gave him a warm smile.
“Good morning, Angel bunny! How are you today?”
Angel tilted his head to one side and kept tapping his foot. After a few moments of confusion, Fluttershy suddenly nodded in understanding.
“Don't worry, Angel, I haven't forgotten. We'll have breakfast together in a moment, but I just need to go feed the chickens first. Is that okay?”
Smiling, Angel nodded and scampered away. With this, Fluttershy closed the door of the cupboard, before flying over to the back door. As she opened it, she took in a deep breath of fresh air, sighing in contentment as the cool morning air refreshed and calmed her. After a few moments of rest, she began to make her way over to the chicken coop, a joyful smile spreading over her face as the pleasant weather lifted her spirits.
“Today's going to be a great day...I just know it!”
Before she could continue her train of thought, however, she was interrupted by the sudden onset of a loud noise just as she reached the coop. She turned to see where it had originated from, and was greeted by the sight of a hulking bipedal beast charging towards her, an unhinged look of madness filling its eyes as it bellowed some strange sort of war cry about mutants and chickens. Her eyes widened in surprise, and she took an instinctive step back. Pressing her ears flat against her head, she unleashed a scream of pure terror as her aggressor grew ever-closer. Finally, she turned and bolted towards the back door, her eyes tightly shut as her hooves thudded against the dirt path.
As soon as she was inside, she slammed the door shut behind her as hard as she could, her eyes watering as she took in deep, panting breaths. Her animal friends all turned to look at her with worried expressions. Angel quickly bounded up to her and placed a paw on her hoof, looking up at her with concern. As she composed herself, she turned to Angel with an anxious look in her eyes.
“A-angel...m-m-monster...a monster t-tried to attack me...” she gasped softly.
Before Angel could respond, however, they both heard sounds of raucous clamour coming from outside. Sharing a nervous glance, they both moved over to the window and they peered out to see what commotion the strange creature was causing.
The bizarre bipedal creature, with yellowed skin and peculiar clothing, held one of the chickens in its arms, making kissy faces at it and gently stroking its back.
“Don't worry chickens, you're safe now! Ed is here to protect you!”
Fluttershy and Angel exchanged a confused glance, but their attention was suddenly drawn back to the window by the sound of enraged yelling.
“EDWARD!”
They saw two more creatures join the first, both with pinkish-white skin – though the taller one had fairer skin and an odd black hat, while the shorter one had skin that was a more tanned pink. Again, these other two creatures were dressed in an odd fashion much like the first. Both of them were scowling, and approached their companion hurriedly with clear looks of annoyance on their faces.
“How could you even think of doing something so irresponsible?!” the hat-wearer shouted furiously.
The one with yellow skin – presumably named “Ed” –– froze at this and gently put down the chicken, before dragging its feet across the floor as it gazed at the ground sadly. Eventually, it turned to its companions and spoke.
“But...but Double D! I though it might have been trying to attack the chickens!”
The hat-wearer – whose name was now known to be “Double D” – simply shook his head and sighed.
“Honestly, Ed...do you truly believe that? It should have been fairly obvious that the pegasus is probably owned by whoever inhabits this property. The likelihood of it trying to 'attack' the chickens would be slim at best, and your actions, however well-intentioned, were completely uncalled for.”
The shorter one piped up at this, “Yeah, lummox! Can't we go anywhere without you causing some kinda trouble?” he complained.
As the three of them continued their discourse in this manner, Fluttershy turned back to Angel with a confused look on her face.
“So...it was only trying to attack me...because it was worried about my chickens?”
Angel just tilted his head and shrugged.
Fluttershy shook her head and turned back to the window, looking at the squabbling trio with mild curiosity.
She placed a hoof under her chin thoughtfully. “They don't seem to be too dangerous, and it looks like they have good intentions at heart. But...”
Before she could continue, however, she noticed the one known as “Double D” was slowly approaching the back door. Her eyes grew wide in shock, and she grabbed Angel and pulled him close to her chest before hiding out of sight behind the kitchen counter.
“Eek! One of them is coming this way!” she squeaked.
After a few moments of tense silence, the sound of three gentle knocks against the door resounded throughout the cottage.
“Hello! Is anyone home?” a voice called out.
Fluttershy held her breath and sat perfectly still, not daring to move even the slightest muscle. It wasn't long before the knocks repeated and the voice called out again.
“Hello? Is anyone there? My deepest apologies if I'm disturbing you, but I was just wondering if my friends and I could speak with you a moment?”
Fluttershy glanced down at Angel, who simply gave her a curt nod. Placing him down on the floor, Fluttershy calmly trotted over to the door. Taking a deep breath, she gingerly placed her hoof against the door handle, before slowly opening the door to see the strange bipedal creature stood before her with a look of surprise and its fist raised as though to knock a third time.
“Um...hello?” she mumbled softly, “Can I help you?”
The creature's arm and jaw both fell slack for a few moments as it simply stared at her. Its companions soon stood by its side and did the same. Eventually, the short one spoke up.
“It...it can talk?” he stated in a hoarse whisper.
Fluttershy was slightly taken aback at this. “Of course I can talk. And I'm a she, not an 'it', thank you.” Mentally berating herself for sounding rude, she flinched and quickly added a hushed “um, sorry” afterwards.
There was an awkward silence following this. Eventually, Double D cleared his throat and began to speak.
“Well, I was hoping we could talk with the owner of this delightful property. Do you know where they might be?” he asked.
Fluttershy nervously kicked a hoof at the ground before turning to face Double D once again.
“That would be me. I live here. This is my cottage,” she explained.
After she said this, further silence descended upon the four of them, creating a rather discomforting atmosphere. Suddenly, Ed broke the silence with a simple statement.
“Aliens!”
They all turned to him with a look of confusion.
“I beg your pardon?” Double D queried.
“We were abducted by aliens, and they dumped us in that forest. Now we're trapped on an alien world. Simple!” Ed proclaimed triumphantly, folding his arms and grinning. Eddy sighed and facepalmed at this, while Double D shook his head. Before the trio could start arguing again, Fluttershy quickly interrupted them.
“Er...maybe we could continue this inside? If that's okay with you, I mean...” she suggested.
Double D turned to her and sighed, rubbing his fingers against his temples.
“Yes...yes, please. That would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. It looks like we have a lot to discuss...”
Fluttershy nodded. she turned and began to make her way inside, the three peculiar beings following her soon after. Looking down at the floor, she sighed and gently closed her eyes.
“This is going to be one of those days...” she thought.
“Come on, pick up the pace! I think they're gaining on us!” Eddy cried.
“I'm running as fast as I can, Eddy!” Double D wheezed.
“I'm not in my happy place, guys!” Ed whined.
The Eds' feet thumped hard against the colourfully gravelled ground of The Lane as they thundered along, fleeing as fast as they could from the infuriated group of kids not far behind.
“Wait 'till I get my hands on you, dorks! I'll pound the tar outta ya!” Kevin snarled, his legs pumping furiously against the pedals of his bike.
“You have besmirched the honour of the son of a shephard for the last time, Ed-boys! Prepare yourselves for a most merciless thrashing!” Rolf roared, his rolled-up sleeves revealing bulging and muscular arms, his eyes disturbingly bloodshot and his mouth rabidly foaming at the edges.
“Plank's gonna give you such a pinch!” Jonny growled, his shirt tattered and worn and his oaken companion clutched tightly in his hands.
Hurtling around the corner, all three Eds began glancing around the lane worriedly, seeking any ways in which they could quickly escape from their livid pursuers – and distressingly finding none.
“Mom's gonna be so mad, Ed!” Sarah screeched, her legs kicking hard against pedals of her tricycle.
“Ooh, you're gonna pay!” Jimmy added from his spot in the wagon attached to the trike.
“This is so uncool, you guys! It's gonna take me weeks of conditioning to even start fixing this mess!” Nazz screamed, her hair a horrifying and tangled echo of what it once was.
As the angry cries of the Cul-de-sac kids echoed in the air behind them, Double D's eyes began to water as he wondered how everything could have gone so, so wrong.
“And it had started as such a nice day...” he thought to himself, “the shining rays of the sun beautifully illuminating the quaint architecture of our peaceful little cul-de-sac...and now look at what's occurred! Oh, I should have known better than to trust another one of Eddy's ill-fated scams!”
Before he could continue his rapid train of thought, he was snapped out of his sorrowful daze by the sound of Eddy's voice.
“Hey, guys! Over here!” he cried out, “We can lose 'em in the thick of the woods!”
As Ed and Eddy made their way towards the fence, Double D swallowed hard and grimaced.
“I'm not sure that's such a good idea, Eddy...”
Eddy shot Double D a panicked look and grabbed him by the shoulders.
“You got any better ideas on such short notice, Double D? It's now or never!”
Double D looked at Eddy with a shocked expression. He'd never known his friend to be so bluntly serious about something, and especially not in this sort of manner. Closing his eyes, Double D silently nodded. He then felt himself hurtling through the air, as Ed grabbed both him and Eddy and threw them both over the fence and the creek on its other side. Eventually the two of them landed right by the outskirts of the forest, where they were shortly joined by Ed. Double D was about to make a remark about his rough landing, until he was interrupted by the sounds of the kids' voices calling out from The Lane.
“Hey, where'd they go?!” Sarah squealed, her voice laden with fury.
“I think they went this way!” Kevin remarked.
Shooting each other terrified glances, the Eds quickly got up and began quickly making their way into the forest, fleeing deep into the unexpected sanctuary of the woods.
“...so, let me see if I'm understanding this correctly,” Double D calmly stated. Seeing Fluttershy nod, he took a deep breath and continued.
“We are in a wide, vast kingdom known as Equestria, which is populated by all manner of colourful talking equines. The weather itself is not wild and free of control, but rather is manipulated by pegasi such as yourself. The only place where the weather flows in manner similar to what we're accustomed to would be the 'Everfree Forest', which we have just exited not long ago. And the kingdom as a whole is a diarchy ruled over by two royal sisters.”
“Yes, that sounds about right,” Fluttershy confirmed.
Double D took in another long, deep breath as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Eventually, he released this one as a tired and exasperated sigh, letting his shoulders droop as he stared distantly into his teacup.
“Well, I would venture so far as to say that this is quite possibly the strangest situation the three of us have found ourselves in, but with the frequency of our madcap mishaps I somehow doubt that may be the case...” he commented sadly.
The four of them were sat gathered around the table in Fluttershy's kitchen, Double D and Fluttershy each drinking a small cup of tea while Ed and Eddy drank from a tall glass of lemonade each. They had been discussing the basics of each other's culture (though the Eds had elected to avoid discussing the somewhat carnivorous nature of humans, considering the likely herbivorous nature of the ponies), along with how the Eds had somehow found themselves transported into Equestria. Though Ed and Eddy had adjusted to the weirdness of the whole situation early on, it seemed as though Double D was still having trouble acclimatising to the peculiarity of his new environment.
Seeing Double D looking so upset caused Fluttershy to wince. She could hardly imagine how difficult it must have been for the three of them to have been pulled out of their world and dumped into her own, especially after all the hardships they'd gone through. She was about to say something to reassure Double D, when Eddy interrupted her.
“Aw, don't look so down, Sockhead!” Eddy exclaimed, slapping Double D on the back and eliciting an annoyed glare in response, “It ain't so bad! It's a...a...” – he searched for the right words for a moment – “...a once in a lifetime opportunity, or somethin'!” he grinned.
Double D fixed his friend with a look of skepticism, “How so, Eddy?”
“Think about it, Double D! A brand new world, with all sorts of cool new stuff to see and do!” he exclaimed, mentally adding “And plenty of new suckers, to boot...”
Seeing Double D's bemused expression, he continued, “Adventure awaits us, Double D! And besides, I'm sure you'll figure out a way to get us home in no time! I mean, there's gotta be someone around here who'll know how to get us outta this mess! Right, Ed?”
They all turned to Ed, who was gazing off into the distance with a look of deep thought. As he turned back to the others, they all recoiled at the deathly serious expression he bore. Eventually, he spoke to them in a hushed tone, asking what the inflection of his voice would have led one to believe was one of the most important questions in the history of creation.
“Why do they call them woodchucks if they don't chuck wood?”
The others all sighed in bewilderment, and Eddy banged his head against the table.
“Figures...” he groaned.
Chuckling quietly to himself, Double D placed his hand against his chin thoughtfully, “In any case, you may be onto something here, Eddy. Perhaps there is someone in this town of, er...”
“Ponyville,” said Fluttershy.
“...of Ponyville that could aid us in finding a way back to our own world.”
Finishing off his tea, Double D turned to Fluttershy with an appreciative look.
“Thank you kindly for your hospitality, Fluttershy. Though I hope it isn't asking too much, there is one more favour I would like to request of you.”
“Of course!” she smiled softly.
“Do you know of anyone here in Ponyville that could help us with our plight? And if so, could you perhaps direct us to their domicile?”
Fluttershy clopped her hooves together in thought for a moment before turning back to Double D.
“Well, there is my good friend Twilight Sparkle. She lives over in the library at the west side of town. I could take you there, if you like?”
Double D beamed at this, “That would be most appreciated, Fluttershy. Thank you.”
“No problem! Just give me a moment to get ready, and we can be on our way.”
It wasn't long before Fluttershy was ready to leave. Soon, the four of them exited the front door of Fluttershy's cottage, and began making their way over to Twilight's library.
Levitating the last book into place on the shelf of the bookcase, Twilight smiled and let out a contented sigh. Today was the library’s bi-monthly re-shelving day, and she had just spent the better part of the morning carefully organising the books into their correct locations. It had been an arduous task, to be sure – especially since Spike had gone out to do some grocery shopping, leaving her to sort the books out all by herself – but now it was finally done.
With her task completed, Twilight stood up and stretched, allowing herself a brief moment of respite. A loud and thunderous rumbling quickly cut this short, and she nervously looked around to trace its source before sheepishly glancing down at her stomach and blushing.
“Oh, right…I missed breakfast, didn’t I?” she mumbled, “Well, I guess I’d better go grab something to eat.”
She made her way into the kitchen and flung open the cupboard with her magic, levitating a plate onto the nearby countertop. Before she could actually put anything on her plate, however, she was interrupted by a faint knocking from the library’s front door.
Twilight cringed and spared her plate a momentary longing glance, before letting out a defeated sigh. Reluctantly levitating the plate back into the cupboard, she closed the cupboard door and trotted over to the front door of the library. She threw open the door, and was greeted with the sight of Fluttershy pawing at the ground bashfully.
“Oh! Hello, Fluttershy. What brings you here?” Twilight asked, smiling.
“Hello, Twilight. Can I please come inside?” Fluttershy asked meekly.
“Of course, right this way,” Twilight led Fluttershy into the centre of the room and fixed her with a curious look, “It looks like something’s bothering you. Is everything alright?”
Fluttershy stared at Twilight momentarily, before nodding her head “Yes,” then shaking her head “No,” then closing her eyes and sighing, “Well, sort of. There’s something really important we need to discuss. It’s a…little bit complicated.”
Twilight was perplexed by this, but before she could comment on it she was interrupted by Eddy barging through the doorway.
“Jeez, my legs are killin’ me…” he grumbled, picking some wax out of his ear and indifferently flicking it away. “Why did we have to go sneakin’ through all those back alleys, anyways?”
Fluttershy winced and turned to him with a despondent look, “I already told you, we had to keep you out of sight until we spoke to Twilight. You would all look rather strange to a lot of the other townsponies…um, no offense…and they might not react so well to three strange creatures suddenly showing up in town.”
Eddy shot Fluttershy an annoyed look, but whatever remark was he was about to make was cut off by Double D entering the library.
“Oh, the architecture of this building is absolutely fascinating! I mean, a library built inside a tree? Why, it’s such a…a novel idea, if you’ll pardon the pun!” he cheerfully exclaimed, fervently glancing around with his hands joyfully clasped together.
Ed bounded in soon after, his face contorted into a wide grin, “They have buns here, Double D?! Oh, I am so famished!” he remarked gleefully.
Eddy turned to him with a look of bemusement, “What, is your stomach bottomless or somethin’, Ed? We just had breakfast not two hours ago!”
Ed jogged over to the desk on the opposite side of the room and began to curiously fiddle with the inkwell, “Don’t blame me, Eddy! My belly-”
“…what in Equestria…?” Twilight murmured, her face frozen in bewilderment.
With this remark, the Eds all turned to face Twilight, seemingly noticing her for the first time. Ed just smiled and continued with his prior activity. Double D’s mouth simply hung open in awe. Eddy rolled his eyes and groaned disinterestedly.
“Great. They got pegasuses here, figures they’d have unicorns too…”
“I think you call them ‘pegasi’ if there’s more than one, Eddy…” Ed quipped.
Eddy raised an eyebrow, “Who are ya, Sockhead?”
“I read comic books, Eddy!” Ed explained.
At the mention of his colloquial nickname, Double D snapped out of his trance and turned to Twilight, “Sorry about that. I believe an explanation is in order. My name is Eddward, though most call me Double D, and these are my good friends Ed and Eddy. As you’ve probably ascertained, we’re…not really from around here.”
Twilight tilted her head and raised her brow quizzically, “Yeah, I can kind of see that.”
Double D cleared his throat and continued, “I’ll try and keep this short…basically, we somehow ended up being transported from our world into yours. After wandering around what you call the ‘Everfree Forest’ for a while, we ended up at the cottage of Fluttershy, who acted as a most gracious host towards us in our time of need,” – Fluttershy blushed at this – “She then directed us to your library, claiming that you would be able to aid us in solving our current predicament.”
Twilight nodded and tapped her chin in consideration; “So, basically…you’re from another world, and you guys want me to help you find a way back home?”
“In a nutshell…” Double D agreed.
Twilight closed her eyes in thought for a few moments, before reopening them and nodding at Double D.
“Okay, that sounds fair enough. I’m not sure if I can think of anything off the top of my head, but I’m certain there’s bound to be something useful in one of my books.”
As she said this, a book suddenly flew over her head and landed right before her hooves. Turning to see where it had come from, her eyes widened in distress as she saw Ed clambering up the bookcase, picking up random books and idly glancing through their contents before tossing them over his shoulder.
“Ed, stop!” she shrieked, ensnaring him in a magical aura and levitating him back onto the ground. “I just spent all morning re-shelving these books, and I don’t want to have to spend the rest of the day cleaning them up again! Now, go put them back where you found them!”
Ed lowered his head and mumbled an apologetic “sorry” before heading off to clean up the books. Sighing, Twilight shook her head and turned back to Double D.
“Sorry about that. Now, as I was saying- hey, are you okay?”
Double D’s eyes were wide, one eye sporadically twitching while his hands were clamped firmly over his mouth in shock. Eventually, he slowly lowered them and quietly spoke.
“What…what was that?”
Twilight stared at him with confusion, “What was what?”
“That…that thing you just did, with the glowing aura, and the levitation, and…” he trailed off.
Now Twilight was even more confused, “Huh? You mean you’ve never seen anyone use magic before?”
“…m…magic?” he shakily whined.
Twilight nervously scratched the back of her head and gave him a weak smile, “Um…yeah. I’m guessing they don’t really have magic where you’re from, but it’s really commonplace here. In fact, our world practically runs on it. All three of the main pony races have some form of inherent magic in them, but unicorns are the only race that can readily utilise it in some form through their horns, as you’ve just witnessed…” she carefully explained, noting Double D’s uncomfortable expression.
A painful silence descended upon the room as everyone turned to face Double D. Slowly, his mouth started to stretch into a disconcerting grin as he began giggling softly, his delirious mirth gradually rising higher in pitch until it transformed into full-blown laughter.
“Why yes, of course! That makes perfect sense!” he screeched madly, “This is a world full of weather-controlling pegasi and talking unicorns and lord-knows-what-else, why not throw magic into the mix as well to finish it all off?! In fact, why don’t we just toss all logic and sensibility out the window, throwing caution to the wind as we descend into sheer anarchy and madness!?”
Suddenly, he collapsed onto the ground and curled into a fetal position, gently rocking back and forth as he gibbered to himself inaudibly. Twilight and Fluttershy backed away slightly with a terrified look of concern on their faces, while Ed and Eddy regarded Double D with a demeanour of accustomed disdain.
“…are you done yet?” Eddy sighed.
Double D stopped for a moment and glanced up at Eddy with a distant gaze, “Yes, I…no, wait, hold on a moment…” – he held a finger up in a pausing gesture as he took several deep breaths, before nodding and continuing – “Yes…yes. I think I’m finished.”
He carefully stood up and dusted himself off, before turning to Twilight with a remorseful look.
“I do offer my most sincere apologies for that momentary transgression, Twilight. It’s just…having the very foundation of your understanding of reality torn away before your very eyes can be a bit of a harrowing experience, to say the least.”
Twilight visibly relaxed and offered him a sympathetic smile, “Don’t worry about it, I understand. I ended up in a similar situation myself once…now that was a crazy day, for sure.”
Double D returned the smile and coughed politely, “Yes, well…in any case, we should probably return to the matter at hand.”
“Right. Like I was saying before, I’m sure there would be something in my books that could help you guys with your current problem. Give me a few minutes, and I’ll see what I can find.”
As she began trotting over to the book case, Double D spoke up.
“Do you mind if we assist? I’m sure your search will yield results faster if four of us are searching instead of just one.”
“Um…maybe I could help, too? If that’s okay with you, I mean…” Fluttershy added.
Twilight turned to them and gave them a wide smile, “Sure, that would be great! Thanks!”
Eddy groaned and dropped onto his backside, wrapping his arms over his head, “Oh, great. It’s not enough that we’re stuck in this crazy world full of talking horses, now I gotta carry out manual labour, too?”
Double D turned to Eddy and sighed irritably, “Honestly, all you’ve done since we left the cottage is complain nigh-constantly. Couldn’t you at least show some enthusiasm at the prospect of finding a way home?”
Eddy glared at Double D as he pondered this for a moment, before growling and making his way towards the bookshelf.
“Ed! Heel!” he snapped his fingers, and Ed quickly ran over to Eddy’s side. Eddy leapt up onto Ed’s shoulders and began carefully looking through the different books on the shelf. Twilight and Fluttershy soon joined in the search.
Double D clapped his hands together delightedly, “That’s the spirit! Why, with our co-ordinated efforts, we should be able to discern a solution to this dilemma in no time-”
Suddenly, he was interrupted by a scratchy, high-pitched voice calling out from behind.
“Twilight, I’m back! I got the things you wanted- whoa, what’s going on in here?”
They all turned to face the doorway to see Spike standing there, a puzzled look on his face and a sack full of groceries clutched in one of his claws. Double D’s eyes went wide once again, his head tilting to one side as his mind tried to process what his eyes were observing.
Directly in the centre of his field of vision was a dragon; specifically, a baby dragon; more specifically, a living, breathing, talking baby dragon.
A ghost of a smile crept onto his face at this newest revelation, and he let out a relaxed and accepting sigh as this new fact firmly lodged itself deep within his mind.
He then proceeded to pass out.
“...do you think they’re still following us?”
“It’s hard for me to ascertain that from this vantage point, Eddy, but...I would assume so, given that I can’t seem to hear any traces of movement from behind us.”
“Jeez...that’s a relief,” Eddy sighed, his shoulders sagging.
“Ah...foliage!” Ed stated, gently prodding a pile of fallen leaves with his foot.
Night had long since fallen over the forest, and the Eds had been fleeing from their pursers for a good few hours now. Although it would have been difficult for them to determine when, it was undeniable that at some point they had gotten lost in the woods, their route continuously twisting and turning until all bearings had been completely mislaid. Sighing, Double D dragged his hand over his face and moaned.
“Don’t you think it’s about time we started to head back, Eddy? Our parents must be worried sick about us, and I’m sure the other kids would have forgiven us for our misdoings by now, however wretched they may have been.”
Eddy spun around and leapt towards Double D, firmly planting his feet in Double D’s chest while grabbing his friend by the scruff of his shirt collar.
“Are you kidding me?!” he hissed, eyes wide in panic, “There’s no way we can go back there! Didn’t you see the looks in their eyes? Those kids were out for blood, Double D! They’d maul us if we went back now!”
“Yeah, Double D!” Ed added, “By now, Sarah will have told Mom, and Mom will have told Dad, and Dad will have said ‘Not now, I’m reading the sports section’!” he screamed, his eyes beginning to tear up.
Double D sadly looked back and forth between his two companions, as though he were deeply contemplating something. Eventually, he swallowed hard and sighed.
“...very well then, gentlemen. But...what do you suppose we do for shelter? I hardly expect there to be anywhere we can stay this deep into the forest.”
Eddy leapt off of Double D’s shirt and back on to the forest floor, “No problem, Double D! We’ll just camp it out here for the night.”
Ed immediately brightened up at this, and began to excitedly hop from foot to foot while clapping his hands. “Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! We get to camp out tonight!”
Double D gasped, “I beg your pardon?! Surely you jest, Eddy! The floor in this area of the forest is absolutely filthy!” he closed his eyes and shuddered, “Not to mention who knows what sort of creatures could be lurking in the close vicinity of our campsite, waiting to strike at us in our slumber?”
Eddy flinched at the last point, but still held a firm and steadfast gaze as he looked at Double D.
“We’ve been running for hours, Sockhead. I’m pooped. Can’t we just take a quick nap here...for a good couple hours, at least...and then maybe find somewhere better in the morning?”
Double D squinted at Eddy for a few moments, before sighing with a weary nod.
“Alright, Eddy...you win. We’ll rest here for the evening. But if something goes awry, don’t be surprised to hear me say ‘I told you so’...”
Eddy grinned, “Thanks, Sockhead. Now, let’s get some shut-eye. I’m beat.”
“Ooh, ooh! I know!” Ed yelled, running over to his friends and removing his jacket, “We can all use my jacket as a blanket! Nice and toasty like a bowl of cabbages, yum!”
Double D and Eddy stared at the jacket – Ed’s jacket, the jacket, the very same jacket that had never been washed even once since its owner had first procured the accursed thing who-knows-how-long-ago – and shared a look of displeasure before turning back to Ed with faint forced smiles.
“That’s, um...very nice of you, Ed. But I, uh, think we’ll be fine without. We wouldn’t want to trouble you, now.”
Ed grabbed Double D and Eddy and wrapped them into a big hug, “Aw, pee-shaw, Double D! It’s no trouble at all! That’s what friends are for, right?”
Double D sighed and shut his eyes tightly. He wasn’t getting out of this one any time soon.
“Thank you, Ed. Your generosity never ceases to amaze me, sometimes,” Double D replied with the utmost sincerity.
The three of them proceeded to lie down besides each other on the forest floor, Ed draping his jacket over them all as a makeshift blanket. Bidding each other goodnight, they all unleashed a hearty yawn one by one. Then, ever so quietly, their eyes fluttered closed until they were all enrapt in the pleasant dreams of a peaceful slumber.
...several minutes passed without disturbance. Suddenly, a myriad of thin, wispy tendrils of smoke, each one luminescent with an eerie red glow, began to twist and coil around the Eds, entangling and grasping the trio limb by limb. Eventually, the mass of tendrils began to throb and pulse, gradually increasing in size until they coalesced into a huge, singular orb of light that encased the group of unconscious adolescents entirely. The mist began to grow brighter, brighter, brighter still, until the light the mist emitted was blindingly intense.
Then in an instant, the light vanished – and along with it, the three Eds.
When Double D next awoke, he could feel his head pounding as though it were populated by an army of enraged blacksmiths, all of them angrily swinging their hammers against the edges of his cranium as hard as they could. His mind tried to scramble for some form of cognitive thought, but didn’t manage to get very far before a loud voice from nearby jolted him back into full consciousness.
“Hey, guys! I think he’s waking up!”
He gingerly opened his eyes to see Eddy stood beside him, staring down at him with a slightly vexed expression.
“Man, talk about getting your beauty sleep…” he remarked frustratedly, “Nice of ya to join us, Sockhead. Anyways, we-”
He was cut off by Double D leaping up and wrapping his arms around him, burying his face into Eddy’s chest as he began to sob heavily.
“Oh, Eddy! I just awoke from the most unorthodox nightmare!” Double D cried into his friend’s chest, as Eddy scowled and forcefully attempted to pry Double D off him to no avail. “I dreamt that we had somehow been transported into this bizarre magical fantasy world, full of pegasi, and unicorns, and dragons, a-and magic, and…and…”
Pulling his head away from Eddy’s chest, he slowly turned to see Ed, Fluttershy, Twilight and Spike all watching him with expressions of great concern.
“…and…and I didn’t dream any of that, did I?”
They all shook their heads.
“This is all real, and all of that actually happened, didn’t it?”
They all slowly nodded.
Double D sighed and lowered his head, “Of course…”
Eddy snarled and shoved Double D away with his foot, sending Double D tumbling backwards several feet; “Ah, quit your blubberin’! You’re gonna wreck my shirt!”
Twilight frowned at Eddy for this, but made no comment. Instead, she trotted over to where Double D had landed and helped him to his feet.
“I’m glad to see you’re awake, Double D. Unlike some of us…” she glared at Eddy, who threw his arms up in frustration.
“Hey, I’m happy to see him up! I just didn’t want him messing up my shirt. It’s cotton, you know?”
Spike folded his arms and shook his head, “You guys are so weird…”
“Anyway…” Twilight continued, turning to face Double D, “What Eddy was trying to say earlier is that we’ve exhausted all of the relevant books in the library, and we couldn’t find anything that would aid us in getting you three home; so it looks like you guys might be stuck here for a while…”
Double D stared at her blankly for a few moments as he took this in. He closed his eyes and sighed, before reopening them and giving Twilight a weak smile.
“I see…that is a rather unfortunate outcome. Regardless, I must thank you for your assistance, Twilight. Your valiant efforts in trying to help us find a way of returning us home are greatly appreciated.”
Twilight gave him a gentle smile in return, “No problem. I’m happy I could help.”
“However…” Double D continued, “This does leave us with an additional dilemma compounding our current predicament…”
“Huh? What would that be?” Twilight asked, confused.
“How are we going to introduce ourselves to the townsfolk, exactly?” Double D replied, “Although she didn’t seem to go into much detail, Fluttershy implied that there have been one or two near-calamitous events as of recent that would make endearing ourselves to the other ponies somewhat…difficult.”
Twilight blinked a few times as she took this in. He was right; after all of the madness that had occurred in Ponyville over the last year – not to mention the fairly recent attack on Canterlot by the Changelings – it was unlikely that the other townsfolk would react too well to a trio of strange beings suddenly popping up out of nowhere. The sight of the Eds marching down the street would probably cause several ponies to explode. Thrice.
Twilight slowly paced around the room for a moment as she pondered this, before turning back to the group with an excited gasp.
“Pinkie Pie! Of course!”
Eddy scratched his head and gave her a baffled look, “Say what now?”
Twilight nodded towards Eddy, “My good friend Pinkie Pie is very sociable, and is extremely talented at throwing parties,” she explained, “I’m sure that if she threw you a welcoming party and introduced you to the other ponies, they’d warm up to you all fairly quickly.”
“A party? Sweet!” Eddy grinned.
“Why, that sounds delightful!” Double D agreed, clapping his hands together before pausing and continuing, “Though, how can you be certain that she will want to throw us a party?”
Spike scoffed at this and smirked, “Oh, please. You guys are new in town. Pinkie will be practically begging to throw you a welcoming party!”
“Well, that does seem like a good way to introduce ourselves to your fellow villagers…and a jovial celebration would be a nice way to relax after all the duress we’ve been under recently…” Double D admitted.
“It’s settled, then!” Twilight proclaimed, stomping her hoof. “We’re going to see Pinkie Pie!”
“One problem, Einstein,” Eddy remarked, “How are we gonna get there if we ain’t supposed to let anyone see us?”
Fluttershy piped up at this, “We’ll just have to go through the back alleys like we did before.”
“What? Again?!” Eddy groaned.
“It can’t be helped, Eddy,” Double D shrugged.
“Fine…” Eddy growled.
Twilight turned to Spike and gave him a curt nod, “Spike, can you look after the library while we’re out? Hopefully this shouldn’t take too long.”
Spike offered her a mock-salute, “Don’t worry, Twilight! You can count on me!”
Twilight giggled, “Thanks, Spike. Come on, guys. Let’s go visit Pinkie Pie.”
And with that they left the library, Twilight leading the group with Fluttershy and the Eds not far behind.
The midday sun hung lazily in the sky, gently illuminating the confectionary-themed architecture of Sugarcube Corner. The arrestingly designed building sat proudly in the midst of several houses of common construction and composition, thus giving the structure bold prominence in comparison to its peers.
Shrouded in the murky shadows of an inconspicuous alleyway nearby, Ed stood crouched with a grim expression of determination etched onto his face. He eyed the vibrantly-coloured bakery before him dubiously, well aware of the stealthy nature of the mission at hand. He glanced both ways to see if there were any ponies passing by his location; spying none, he slowly began to creep forwards out of the alleyway…
Suddenly, Eddy kicked his posterior hard, sending him flying forward into the air momentarily before he landed on his head a few feet away, “Move it, ya lump!”
Double D came jogging up from behind with a worried expression on his face, “Oh, Eddy! Must you be so rough?”
Fluttershy and Twilight soon joined them, both looking towards Ed anxiously.
“Yeah…last time I checked, the definition of stealth didn’t include ‘kick your friend in the backside and draw attention to yourself’!” noted Twilight.
“Besides, you could have seriously hurt him, or even given him brain damage!” Fluttershy added.
Eddy started chuckling and turned to them, pointing to Ed, “Brain? What brain? Ed’s all empty space between the ears! Right, monobrow?”
Ed just grinned and continued to lie on his head, “What?”
Double D sighed and facepalmed at this. Twilight shook her head and turned to Double D, pointing to Sugarcube Corner as she spoke.
“Anyway…this is Sugarcube Corner, the bakery where my friend Pinkie Pie lives and works. Like I said before, if we introduce you to Pinkie, she should be more than happy to throw you a welcoming party, and introducing you to the other ponies will no longer be a problem.”
Double D nodded and smiled, “That sounds most wonderful, Twilight. Thank y-”, before pausing and raising his hand, “Wait…did you say ‘bakery’?”
Twilight looked at Double D with confusion, “Why? Is that a problem?”
“Er, well…”
A piercing yell echoed throughout air as Ed loudly made his presence known.
“FI, FI, FO, FUM! I SMELL CANDY AND SWEETS, YUM-YUM!”
In an instant he was on his feet and running towards the bakery with his tongue lolling from his mouth, all thoughts of tact and stealth now long gone. Eddy groaned and began to chase after him.
“Hey! Wait up, burr-head! Ain’t you supposed to be keeping your voice down?”
Double D and the two mares watched as they sped away, all three wearing tired looks of disdain.
“…do those two even grasp the concept of subtlety?” Twilight murmured.
“I’m sure they do, though the way they act sometimes would often lead one to believe otherwise…” Double D sighed. After a few moments of silence, he turned to the others and continued, “Come on, we should catch up to them before they eat your friend out of house and home.”
Twilight nodded with a grimace, “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”
Ed charged into Sugarcube Corner, screeching to a halt on the rug by the entrance as his eyes widened in delight. Before him, he could see all manner of confections and pastries, each one emitting the most alluring and enchanting of scents.
Ed sniffed the air for a moment, before hunching over with a look of pure bliss on his face, “Ah…doesn’t it smell good, Eddy?”
Eddy ran in and was soon by Ed’s side, his angry expression quickly fading as he too partook in the captivating aroma of the bakery’s goods.
“I gotta admit, Lumpy, this stuff don’t smell half bad!”
The two of them hurriedly made their way over to the front display case, Eddy briefly tapping the service bell before cupping his hands around his mouth and yelling, “Hello! Hey, is anyone here?”
Suddenly, a high-pitched feminine voice called out to them, “I’ll be with you in just a second!”
Their attention shifted to the door on their left behind the display case, and as it swung open they saw a mare with a raspberry pink coat and brilliant raspberry mane trot out of the kitchen, a warm and cheerful smile on her face.
Turning towards the counter, she began to say “Hi, how can I help y-”, but suddenly interrupted herself with a shocked gasp before leaping on top of the display case and shoving her muzzle mere inches away from Ed’s face, her eyes wide with excitement.
“Oh my gosh! Who are you? What are you? I’ve never seen you around here before! My name’s Pinkie Pie, what’s yours? Where are you from? Are you moving here to Ponyville, or are you just here for a visit?”
As the joyful pink pony continued to tirelessly ramble at them, Eddy started to back away cautiously. Ed, however, just smiled and began to gently tug at Pinkie’s mane, causing her to cease in her boundlessly enthusiastic tirade.
“Whoa, cool! Is your mane made of cotton candy?” he asked.
Pinkie giggled and shook her head, “No, of course not, silly!” she gasped and cheerfully continued, “Wouldn’t it be cool if manes were edible, though? Then you’d always have a snack in case you got hungry!” her smile quickly faded as a simple realisation dawned on her, “Wait…wouldn’t your mane eventually run out?”
Ed grinned and suddenly clapped his hands together, “But what if it could grow back? Then you could eat it again and again, and you’d never go hungry!”
Pinkie beamed as she turned to face him, grabbing his face in her forehooves, “That’s brilliant! Why didn’t I ever think of that?!”
By now, Double D, Twilight and Fluttershy were standing in the entrance doorway, trying to comprehend the sheer absurdity of the scenario unfolding before their very eyes. Eventually, Twilight cleared her throat, drawing everyone’s attention towards her.
“Pinkie, please get down from there. Ed, stop encouraging her.”
Ed and Pinkie both blushed as they backed away from one another, Pinkie leaping off the display case and trotting towards her pony friends with a sheepish grin.
“Sorry, Twilight. I guess I got a little overexcited. But…” she gestured to the three Eds, “Who are these guys? I’ve never seen anyone or anything like them here in Ponyville before…”
“This is Ed, Double D, and Eddy,” Twilight explained, nodding towards each of them as she spoke their names, “They’re, uh…basically from another world. We tried to find a way to send them home, but our efforts came up fruitless, so they’re going to be staying here in Ponyville for a while. We were hoping you could throw them a welcoming party and introduce them to the other ponies, so that the townsfolk wouldn’t be so scared of their presence in town.”
Pinkie nodded enthusiastically as she took this in, smiling all the while, “Sure, Twilight! That sounds like a great idea!” she turned to face Ed and Eddy and continued, “Don’t worry, you guys. I’m gonna throw you the bestest party that Ponyville’s ever seen! By the time I’m done, everypony will be more than happy to see you guys around!”
Double D smiled at this and nodded towards Pinkie. “Thank you very much, Pinkie Pie. I’m certain the festivities will be most delightful, and I greatly appreciate your assistance in this matter.”
Pinkie turned to face Double D, “It’s no problem at all! I’m happy to help out new friends, especially when…” she trailed off as her smile faded, a perplexed look slowly dawning on her face.
Double D’s smile faded also, and he looked somewhat nervous at the mare’s sudden change in demeanour. “W-what is it? What’s wrong?”
Pinkie slowly trotted past Fluttershy and Twilight and right up to Double D, eyeing him curiously for a while before she spoke.
“Hey…why are you wearing that hat?”
Double D suddenly felt a slight chill run down his spine, and he began to lightly sweat as he furrowed his brow.
“Um, I, er…” he gulped, backing away slowly.
“Where’d you get it?” asked Pinkie, edging towards him.
“Well, y-you see, I…”
“How long have you had it?”
“I, er, th-that’s….”
“Can I see what’s under there?”
By now Double D was sweating profusely, eyes wide with fear as he pressed his back against the wall, “Th-th-that’s n-not really a subject I’d l-like to discuss…”
“Aw…can’t I have just a little peek? Please?”
Everyone else had been watching them with disturbed fascination up until now, but at this point Twilight decided to speak up.
“That’s enough, Pinkie. Can’t you see you’re making him feel uncomfortable?” she said.
“Oh, okay…” Pinkie sighed, flinching. She backed away from Double D and lowered her head, ears drooping as she pawed at the ground, “Sorry, Double D. I didn’t mean to bother you like that. I was just curious, that’s all.”
Double D breathed a sigh of relief and gave Pinkie a calm smile, “That’s quite alright, Pinkie. No harm done.”
As they started to make their way back towards the others, Double D’s foot caught on a loose nail in the floorboards, causing him to trip forwards with a loud slam. Everyone gasped in surprise, and Pinkie quickly turned around to face Double D, accidentally placing her hoof on the tip of his hat in the process.
“Are you okay, Double D?!” she shrieked.
Double D coughed momentarily as he scrambled to gather his bearings, “Yes, yes, I’m fine. No need to worry.”
As Double D got to his feet, he yanked his head back as hard as he could, his hat stretching as it remained firmly trapped under Pinkie’s hoof. Suddenly, there was a loud popping noise as his hat dislocated itself from his head. Standing up to full height, he froze as the realisation of what had just happened struck him like an arrow to the heart, and turned to face the others with a look of unrelenting horror.
Fluttershy’s eyes widened, her legs violently trembling as she hoarsely remarked, “Oh…my…”
Twilight raised a hoof towards her mouth, exclaiming “Dear, sweet Celestia! I…I think I’m going to be…” before galloping out of the store with her eyes tightly shut.
Eddy’s eyes began to water and he turned his gaze away before throwing himself onto his back, legs kicking wildly in the air as he howled with laughter.
Pinkie just tilted her head in curiosity, staring in silence for a few moments before commenting, “Wow…is it real?”
Ed merely raised his eyebrows in surprise, “Whoa…that looks painful, Double D! Can I touch it?”
“NO! That’s quite enough, thank you!” Double D screeched. Snatching his hat from underneath Pinkie’s hoof, he pulled a can of disinfectant out from hammerspace and quickly sprayed the underside of his hat before firmly placing it back atop his head.
Twilight slowly poked her head through the doorway, her face paler than it had been before, “I-is it safe to come back inside? Is his hat back on? Please, please tell me his hat’s back on…”
Pinkie turned to Twilight and smiled, “Don’t worry, Twilight! It’s back on now. You won’t have to worry about seeing-”
“Oh, come now, Twilight!” Double D groaned, cutting Pinkie off, “Aren’t you over-reacting just a tad?”
Before Twilight could come up with a response, Eddy interrupted her.
“Oh, man, Sockhead!” Eddy cackled gleefully, “That was just too rich! You should have seen the look on your face! It was priceless!”
Double D shot him a glare that would have pierced an uncut diamond with ease, “Are we quite through with our jovial jesting?!”
Eddy stopped giggling and got to his feet, grumbling. “Killjoy…”
An awkward silence followed soon after, the way in which the conversation had been derailed leaving everyone feeling too uncomfortable to speak. Eventually, Fluttershy shook her head and turned to face Pinkie.
“Wait a minute…where are the Cakes? With all the noise we’ve been making since we arrived, I would have expected them to have said something about it by now…”
Pinkie looked at Fluttershy and stated matter-of-factly, “The Cakes are out at the moment with the foals, taking them for a stroll around the park. I’m looking after the bakery for them this morning while they’re gone!”
“Oh, wow! They have living cakes here in Equestria too?” Ed remarked.
Pinkie laughed and shook her head at this before turning to look at Ed, “Of course not, silly! The Cakes are all ponies; ‘Cake’ is just their family name! Mr. and Mrs. Cake own and run Sugarcube Corner…they’re the ones who employ me and give me a place to stay!”
With this last remark, Double D jolted as he placed his hand to his chin. “Oh, drat! That reminds me…we don’t really have anywhere to stay here in Ponyville, do we, fellows?” he observed, glancing over at Ed and Eddy.
Eddy frowned and scratched the back of his head, “Now that you mention it, Sockhead…”
Twilight smiled at Double D, “Oh, don’t worry about that. You guys can stay in the guest room at the library with while you’re here in Ponyville.”
Double D beamed at Twilight, eyes watering, “Oh, thank you, Twilight! Really, your hospitality is too much! I promise you, you won’t regret this!”
Twilight continued to smile, nodding before she added, “There’s only one bed, though…so two of you will have to bunk together while the other one uses a sleeping bag on the floor. Is that okay?”
Double D and Eddy momentarily shared a disturbed look, shuddering before deadpanning in unison, “Ed gets the sleeping bag.”
“Aw, no way, guys!” Ed joined in, running over to Pinkie Pie and sweeping her up in one arm, tussling her mane as he grinned, “I’ll just stay here with Pinkie instead, and help out at the bakery!” he paused and looked at her with a nervous smile, “Um, uh…if that’s okay with her, I mean…”
Pinkie grinned and wrapped her forelegs around him in a tight hug, “I’ll have to check with the Cakes, but that’s a-okay by me!”
“Hooray!” Ed exclaimed. Hugging Pinkie back and hopping up and down in place, he tightly shut his eyes in glee, “Oh, this is going to be so much fun! We can stay up late, and eat lots of candy, and we can even tell ghost stories! It’ll be like a home away from home!”
As he made this last statement, Ed immediately halted his bouncing and flung open his eyes. Carefully placing Pinkie back down onto the floor, he gently tapped a finger against his chin as he gazed thoughtfully at the floor, eyes slowly beginning to water.
“Yeah…like a home…away from…home…”
Eddy and Double D looked at each other with worried confusion, before turning back to face Ed.
“…Ed?” Double D queried, “Are you feeling alright?”
Suddenly, Ed fell backwards onto his rump as he started to cry softly, “We can’t go home again, guys! That means no more Mom, no more Dad, no more Sarah, no more comic books, no more TV, no more monster movies, no more jawbreakers!” he wailed, clamping his hands over his eyes in attempt to halt the trickle of tears.
Double D offered him a sorrowful look and explained, “That’s not quite true, Ed. This is only a temporary thing. I’m sure we’ll find a way to return ourselves to our own world eventually, you’ll see.”
Despite this reassurance, Ed continued to sob gently, causing everyone to stare at him with a look of sympathy – except for Eddy. With a frustrated look on his face, he marched over to Ed, hands curled into fists. When he reached Ed, he raised one hand into the air and…
…gently placed it on Ed’s shoulder.
“…hey, Ed?” he said.
Ed stopped crying for a moment and removed his hands from his eyes, looking up at Eddy. He saw Eddy looking at him with one eyebrow raised, a calm smile on his face.
“Don’t worry about it, Ed. Everything’s gonna work out okay, got it? Why, I bet ya we’ll be home before you know it.”
Ed broke out into a huge grin at this, wrapping Eddy into a tight hug, “Aw…thanks, Eddy!”
Immediately, Eddy began to squirm and wriggle in an attempt to free himself from Ed’s grasp, “Hey, hey, hey! Let go, Lumpy, you’re gonna mess up my shirt!”
Ed laughed in embarrassment as he put Eddy back down, before getting to his feet, “Oops, uh…sorry ‘bout that, Eddy.”
Eddy glared at Ed angrily for a moment, before breaking out into a good-natured grin, “Ah, whatever. Just don’t let it happen again, got it?”
Ed wiped his tears away against the sleeve of his jacket, before saluting Eddy with a lopsided smirk, “Roger that, Eddy!”
They all smiled cheerfully at this, until Pinkie Pie suddenly raised one hoof in the air with a serious expression.
“Hey, wait a minute…you said something about jawbreakers, Ed?”
Ed turned to Pinkie and nodded, “Uh-huh?”
Pinkie tapped her hoof to her chin for a moment, before beaming and galloping upstairs, “I just gotta go grab something a sec! Be right back!”
The Eds turned to face Twilight and Fluttershy, who simply shrugged. However, Pinkie was already back before anyone had a chance to say anything. Now resting on her back was a moderately-sized brown cardboard box, inside of which were a triad of three bright white bowling-ball sized spheres – each one rock-hard and coated in an unyielding cascade of sugar. All three Eds snapped to attention as their individual gazes fell upon the box, each instantly recognising the contents within.
“They sure are!” Pinkie confirmed with a cheeky grin, “They’re usually pretty hard to find here in Ponyville, so I have to special order them in…but I always like to keep a box or two of them around,” she paused, before adding “You know, in case of jawbreaker emergencies.”
Double D shakily raised a finger, smile wide with anticipation, “M-may we…?”
Pinkie turned to him with a bemused look, “Of course! That’s what I brought them down here for! Dig in, you guys!”
The Eds all quickly made their way over to the box, each one grabbing a jawbreaker and quickly placing it in his mouth. As they all let out a collective sigh of contentment, Eddy turned to Ed with a smug grin.
“See? What’d I tell ya, Lumpy? Everything’s gonna work out just fine!”
Ed didn’t hear him, however, as he was far too enthralled in the delectable delight of his jawbreaker to notice. Double D simply smiled; thankful at the prospect that, at long last, their fortunes had finally taken a turn for the better.
Things were looking up.
Eddy was snapped into consciousness by the chirping of a nearby bird. As he got up he took in his surroundings, noting how vastly different they were to those of the night before. His face contorted into a perplexed look, shaking his head as he tried to grasp some idea of what had occurred.
“...where the heck are we?”
As soon as Eddy muttered this, Double D let out a hearty yawn. Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes tenderly before glancing around, brow furrowing in confusion.
“Huh? This doesn’t look like our campsite. Where are we?”
Eddy turned to Double D with a bored look, “What are ya, a parrot? I just asked that question only three paragraphs ago!”
Grunting, Double D got to his feet and cricked his back, yelping as he did so. Ed still remained fast asleep, snoring softly as his leg occasionally juddered.
“I’m not sure what to make of this, Eddy. I’ve honestly never seen an area of our local woods quite like this before...”
Eddy growled and stomped over to where Ed was resting, “I bet you ol’ chin-less here went sleepwalking again, and now we’re all stuck in this neck of the woods!”
Eddy raised his leg back into the air for a moment before firmly placing it under Ed’s backside, causing Ed to fly into the air with a somersault. In an instant Ed slammed back down into the ground, softly belching as he awoke with a daze.
“Eggs and bacon, please,” he gurgled happily.
“Way to go, lummox!” Eddy ranted, “It’s not enough that you had to go and screw up my latest scam, but now you’ve gotten us even more lost in the woods than you did before!”
“Actually, Eddy, you may be off the mark a bit there...” Double D interjected, “I’ve been looking at some of the flora around our current vicinity, and none of them seem to match any of the kinds that are local to Peach Creek. In fact, none of them correlate with the botanical species that I remember being listed in my books...”
Eddy gave Double D a look of disbelief, “Wait...so what you’re saying is, we’re in some brand new place that no-one’s been to before?”
Double D winced and turned to Eddy with a hesitant nod, “Now, I don’t think we should jump to any rash conclusions, but the evidence in that regard does seem to be overwhelming...” he paused for a moment, before concluding “...indeed. We may very well be in unexplored territory, gentlemen.”
By now, Ed was entirely awake. He stood to full attention, and proudly wore his jacket once more. He turned to Double D with an excited grin.
“Does that make us adventurers, Double D? Brave explorers, journeying into a bold new world!” he shouted, making a pose as he did so. Double D raised a hand to his mouth and giggled.
“Uh...not quite, Ed,” he admitted, “After all, I only said we may be somewhere uncharted. For all we know, there could be some form of civilisation close by.”
His smile slowly faded as he turned to face Ed and Eddy, the two of them shuddering as they noticed his troubled expression.
“However...I can tell you one thing I’m certain of, fellows,” he stated darkly, “We’re a long, long way from home.”
Eddy slapped a hand against his forehead and groaned, “Oh, great! So now what do we do?”
Double D suggested, “At the very least, we should probably start making our way out of this forest. Time waits for no man, as they say.”
Eddy smiled and clapped his hands, “Come on, then! Let’s get moving!” before he spun around and set off walking.
Double D balked and raised his hand hesitantly, “Wait! How are you sure that’s the right direction? For all we know, that could just lead us deeper into the forest!”
Eddy turned back to face Double D for a moment, “What, you got any better ideas? Let’s go, I ain’t getting any younger!” before carrying on as he did before.
Ed just guffawed and began running after Eddy with a joyful grin. Double D shook his head and sighed as he watched them go. He frowned for a moment in contemplation, before groaning and shrugging his shoulders.
“Oh, what have I got to lose?” he muttered, quickly setting off after his friends.
And with that, the three Eds began their wayward journey through the mysterious Everfree Forest.
“…‘thus, the magical energy is channelled through the horn of the unicorn – which, when combined with the intrinsic thought processes relating to the spell, allows them to’…”
Double D trailed off and sighed, gently closing the book and drumming his fingers against the cover as he turned towards the window with a distant gaze. Two days had now passed since the Eds had first found themselves mysteriously transported to Equestria. Though the denizens of Ponyville had been slightly wary of their presence at first, the party thrown by Pinkie Pie had alleviated the majority of the townsponies’ concerns, and they soon welcomed the Eds with cheerful enthusiasm.
Despite the short amount of time spent in Ponyville thus far, the Eds had managed to adapt to their roles in the community rather swiftly. Ed’s presence had become a welcome addition over at Sugarcube Corner, despite one or two initial misgivings from the Cakes – which, naturally, included Carrot Cake passing out from sheer shock at the whole ordeal. With the occasional bit of guidance from Pinkie Pie here and there, Ed soon became rather adept at baking, increasing the bakery’s productivity by a reasonable amount.
Over at the Golden Oaks Library, Eddy and Double D had settled into their roles, too. Eddy scarcely did anything productive, of course, often preferring to laze around and relax unless ordered otherwise – save for the rare occasions when he would cryptically lock himself away in the bedroom for great deals of time. On these occasions the frantic scribbling of pen on paper could be heard from outside, but when queried on it by the others Eddy would quickly deny such activities, attributing the sounds of scribing to their own imaginations.
Conversely, Double D helped out wherever he could, assisting Twilight and Spike in the organisation of the books, as well as helping Twilight process a new shipment of various literary supplies at one point. When not assisting Twilight in the running of the library, Double D spent his time reading through as many books detailing the ways in which Equestria functions as possible – particularly those relating to unicorns and the theories behind their use of magic. Double D had, in fact, been engaged in such an activity mere moments ago, curled up on the reading chair located in the library’s lobby.
Still gazing outside the window, Double D let out another dispirited sigh. While recent events had led to quite a boon on the Eds’ good fortunes, he couldn’t help but feel slightly disheartened at the lack of means with which to return home. Memories of life back in Peach Creek ricocheted around his mind, and faint tears began to form in his eyes as he considered how those he knew back home, including his parents, would be reacting to his disappearance – and whether or not he would be able to see them again.
“…Double D? Double D!”
He was suddenly snapped out of his trance by the sound of a voice calling his name. He turned to face the source of the disturbance, and his view fell upon none other than Twilight Sparkle, who was staring at him with a look of great concern.
“Is…is everything alright?” she asked, her voice tinged with worry.
Double D sniffed and wiped his eyes, quickly adopting a rather forced smile.
“Yes, of course,” he lied, “Why wouldn’t I be? Everything’s just dandy, don’t you worry.”
Twilight fixed him with a skeptical look. Double D’s smile faltered, and he closed his eyes as he sighed yet again.
“Alright, fine…perhaps that statement is a bit of a mistruth,” he admitted, reopening his eyes and staring off into space with his head hung low. “In all honesty, things are going rather well. My fortune has taken a turn for the better, as have Ed and Eddy’s, and the three of us have ventured into a community where we’ve not only found productive roles, but we’ve been welcomed into said community far more warmly than I could have ever hoped for.”
He lifted his head and looked towards Twilight, who gave him a sympathetic nod but said nothing. Nodding in return, he took another deep breath and continued.
“Despite this, however…I can’t help but feel homesick. With no discernible timeframe for a solution to our dilemma of dimensional misplacement, I can’t help but feel somewhat worried; worried for my parents and those who I knew back in my own world, and how they will be reacting to our disappearance…not to mention whether or not I’ll see my beloved mother and father again…”
He gave Twilight a sorrowful look. After a few moments, she gave him a sad smile and comfortingly placed a hoof on his shoulder.
“I understand where you’re coming from, Double D. If I was in your situation, I have no doubt that I’d be feeling the same way,” her smiled faded as she continued, “However, there really isn’t much we can do about it right now. I’m sorry.”
Double D nodded in understanding, “That’s quite alright, Twilight. Your attempts to comfort me are appreciated.”
Twilight smiled softly, and nodded towards the doorway, “Listen…you’ve been cooped up here in the library since the party, and haven’t really been out all that much. Why don’t we go out for a walk to the market or something, and you can get some fresh air? It’s almost lunchtime anyway, and there are a few things I need to pick up.”
Double D considered this for a moment, “Well, a brief midday venture outside could be just what I need to lift my spirits. In fact, it sounds like a delightful idea. Why not?”
Twilight stepped back as Double D got up from the chair, the latter slowly stretching his muscles before gently placing the book down onto the seat cushion. Trotting over to the front door, Twilight levitated her saddlebags onto her back, before enveloping the door in a shimmering aura and opening it with her magic. Double D soon joined her, quickly making his way over to the library’s entrance. As the two of them departed the library, Twilight softly closed the door behind them with her magic.
They proceeded through the vacant cobblestone streets of Ponyville in silence for a while, both of them content to take in the idyllic serenity of the calm weather. However, it wasn’t long before Double D abruptly turned to face Twilight with an inquisitive look.
“Say, that reminds me…do you know where Eddy is? I haven’t seen him since this morning.”
Twilight turned to him with a playful smirk, “Don’t you mean “I haven’t seen him since he almost burnt down the library this morning’?”
They chuckled as they both remembered the brief ordeal, in the manner that one sometimes finds humour in a harrowing event a good while after its passing. Indeed, earlier that morning they had all been awoken by the smell of smoke, and had made their way downstairs only to discover that Eddy had been haphazardly attempting to prepare breakfast – citing his primary reason for doing so as being “you haven’t lived until you’ve tried one of my omelettes!” Distressingly, however, his ineptitude with the oven had almost caused the oaken walls of the library to catch fire, at which point Spike kicked him out of the building and proceeded to return to bed for the rest of the day.
Once their momentary pause of recollection was over, Twilight nodded and continued, “But to be honest, I’m not sure where he is. If I had to hazard a guess, I’d say he probably went to visit Ed over at Sugarcube Corner or something. Maybe we’ll bump into him at the market?”
“Perhaps,” Double D replied, shrugging. After a few moments of consideration, he added, “Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve seen Ed all that much since the party the other day…”
“Yeah, I haven’t seen much of him either. From what I’ve heard, though, he’s been a rather helpful addition over at the bakery. Pinkie Pie seems to be enjoying his company, too.”
Double D nodded, remarking, “Yes, well…I just hope they’re keeping him away from that Party Cannon…”
They both grimaced and shuddered as they recalled the incident. In the short amount of time the Eds had spent in Ponyville, Ed and Pinkie Pie had quickly become the best of friends. So, on the day of the Eds’ welcoming party, Pinkie Pie had elected to show Ed the infamous Party Cannon, and had even instructed him on how to use it. Unfortunately, Ed had been otherwise distracted by his awe towards the device, and had thus failed to enact one of the most vital steps when he tried to activate it.
There had been cake frosting everywhere.
Double D shook his head and continued, “Yes, well…despite that minor hiccup, I have to say that I felt the festivities went rather well overall. In fact, I daresay this is one of the most welcoming communities that I’ve ever had the fortune of being a part of.”
Twilight was about to respond when she found herself interrupted by cries of distant clamour from up ahead. They both turned to see the marketplace a couple of yards before them. In the distance, a long line of ponies were stretching away from a shoddy makeshift stand, several wooden barrels resting by its side. Twilight and Double D immediately recognised the purveyors of the stand; one of them stood by the crates with a look of amused vacancy on his face, while the other had his hands cupped around his mouth, bellowing a wide array of different consumer-enticing marketing cries.
Twilight arched an eyebrow and tilted her head in curiosity, “Is that…Ed and Eddy? What are they doing?”
Double D’s eyes widened as he slowly placed a hand against his cheek, faintly murmuring, “Mortifying me to no end, I’m sure…”
Twilight turned to face Double D, now even more confused, “Huh?”
Double D groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose, before turning to Twilight with a distraught look, “Well, you see…I’ve told you about Eddy’s infamous ‘scams’, have I not?”
Twilight nodded, “You briefly mentioned them before, yes.”
“Indeed…well, it looks like he’s trying to use the same tactics again here in Ponyville, swindling the ponies out of their hard-earned finances.”
Twilight looked horrified, “He’s conning ponies out of their money? Why would he do that?”
Double D winced at this remark, but carried on nonetheless. “Back in the Cul-de-sac, schemes such as these were usually enacted in order to gain us the funds required to purchase jawbreakers,” he abashedly admitted.
“But…but that makes no sense! I mean, I guess it might have made sense back in your world, sure, but…Pinkie pretty much gives you all free jawbreakers whenever she can! Why would he feel the need to do this?”
Double D turned to look back towards the stand, the sight of his friend tempting ponies and selling them wares centred within his field of vision. Double D’s jaw set, and he glared at the sight before him with a steely gaze of grim determination.
“I’m not quite sure…but I will find out, of that you can be certain.”
Over at the stand, Eddy waved at another customer as they departed the stall, a mug of cider held in their foreleg and look of joyful anticipation on their face.
“Thanks for stopping by! We hope to see you again soon!” Eddy remarked with a cheerful smile. He quickly turned to face his next customer with a disarming grin.
“Welcome to Eds’ Cider Stand! Could I interest you in a mug of our cool, refreshing Triple-E Apple Cider?”
“…wait, Triple-E? Doesn’t that imply that there are three of you? Where’s the other one?” the mare queried.
Eddy scoffed at this and dismissively shrugged, “He’s a little busy elsewhere at the moment, but he’ll be joining us soon,” he calmly explained, before switching back to a more businesslike demeanour. “Now, then…how about that cider?” he winked.
The mare nodded and reached into her saddlebags, tossing a few bits coins on the counter. Eddy smirked and turned towards Ed, cupping a hand around his mouth, “Hey, Lumpy! We need another mug of cider here, pronto!”
Ed grinned and gave Eddy a thumbs-up, “Pronto is my middle name!” he remarked as he turned towards the barrel. He suddenly paused in deep consideration for a moment, shaking his head and commenting “No, wait…it’s Horace,” before grabbing a nearby mug and filling it with cider from the barrel by his side.
As he passed the mug to Eddy, he felt a faint tugging on his jacket, and he turned to see a wall-eyed pegasus mare standing close by. Staring up at him for a moment, she smiled and reached into her saddlebags, pulling out a small chocolate chip muffin with her hoof and offering it to Ed.
“Special delivery!” she proclaimed cheerfully.
Ed smiled and took the muffin, placing it in his jacket’s pocket as he lightly tousled her mane.
“Aw, thank you very much!” he said.
He then tapped his chin contemplatively for a moment, before reaching into the other pocket of his jacket and pulling out a piece of buttered toast. Offering it to the pegasus mare, she took it in her mouth and gave him an appreciative smile, before quickly scampering off towards the back of the line. Ed clasped his hands together and smiled warmly as he watched her go.
“Aw…ain’t they just precious, Eddy?” he remarked happily.
Eddy rolled his eyes and smirked at this as he watched another customer trot away, “Yeah, yeah…whatever, burr-head. Just make sure you keep that cider coming, ya hear? We got a lot of thirsty customers here!”
“Roger that, Eddy!” Ed grinned, “Boy, this is the most fun I’ve had since-”
“A-hem...”
The cough interrupted their banter, silencing them instantly. They both quickly turned to see the source of the noise, and saw Double D standing a few feet away from the side of the stand opposite to Ed’s, his arms folded and his foot tapping rapidly as he bore a vexed expression on his face.
“…and just what do you think you’re doing?” he inquired.
“Double D! You’re just in time!” Eddy shouted gleefully as he passed a mug of cider over to yet another paying customer, “I’m telling ya, this whole ‘cider stand’ thing is the best scam I ever cooked up! Check it out, we’re rolling in dough!” he gestured towards the bulging sack of coins lying on the floor behind the stand.
Double D placed one hand on his hip while he scratched his head with the other, an expression of worried confusion clearly encompassing his visage, “I beg your pardon? Excuse me, Eddy, but are you sure this is legal? Minors aren’t supposed to be selling or consuming cider, as far as I’m aware…”
Eddy turned to Double D with a bemused look, “Relax, Sockhead! It all checks out, alright? Y'see, I was kinda wondering about that myself. So, I flicked through one or two of those Equestrian law books over at the library,” he paused, shutting his eyes and shuddering as he remarked, “Man, now that was boring…”
Shaking his head, he turned back to face Double D and continued, “Anyways, apparently it’s legal here for minors to drink and sell cider, seeing as there ain’t any alcohol in it. So, we’re in the clear!”
Double D visibly relaxed, “Well, if it’s only soft cider, then I suppose that’s alright…” he admitted. Glancing towards the barrels of cider, his brow furrowed as he gestured towards them, commenting, “Though there is one thing that has me perplexed about this whole affair. Dare I ask…where exactly did the two of you procure such copious amounts of high-quality cider in such a brief period of time?”
Eddy opened his mouth to respond, but Ed cut him off before he could say anything.
“Bric-a-brac, swiped from Applejack!” he giggled mirthfully, quietly adding “Hey, that rhymed!” shortly thereafter.
Double D squinted in confusion as he processed this, before his eyes suddenly went wide as he turned to Eddy with a look of unyielding revulsion.
“You…you stole the Apple Family’s excess cider intended for the off-season months?!” he screeched in disbelief.
Eddy quickly adopted a terrified look and leapt towards Double D, slamming his hand over his friend’s mouth as fast as was humanly possible. He furtively glanced around in distress, though he was soon relieved to see that none of the townsponies had paid any heed to Double D’s outburst. Scowling, he suddenly grabbed Double D by the tip of his hat and pointed a finger at him accusingly.
“Listen up, Sockhead,” Eddy growled, “I’ve worked too hard and put too much effort into this scam to let you mess it all up by being a goody-goody two-shoes. Every chance I got over the last few days, I racked my brains trying to think of an idea for a scam, until I finally came up with one that felt just right. And you know what? It worked, and now we’ve finally hit the jackpot!” he grinned, gesturing towards the coin sack with his thumb, “Don’t forget, some of those bits are yours too, y’know.”
“So this is what you’ve been planning for in your spare time…” Double D mumbled as understanding slowly dawned in his mind. Frowning, he slapped Eddy’s hand away and took a step back.
“I don’t wish to have any part in this, Eddy,” he hissed coldly, “Of all the dishonest, conniving, abhorrent, detestable and morally questionable acts you’ve partaken in, this is by far the worst!”
He paused, sighing and shaking his head before despondently continuing, “I mean…what would drive you do this, Eddy? Ever since we’ve arrived in Ponyville, all the citizens of this town have done is extend to us a hand…or hoof, as the case may be…of friendship, giving us a place to stay and aiding us in whichever way they can.”
He reopened his eyes and glared at Eddy as he finished, “And this…this is how you choose to repay them? How could you?”
Eddy just stared at him for a moment, his expression one of pure incomprehension. Eventually, he shook his head and testily replied, “You…you just wouldn’t get it, Sockhead. You wouldn’t understand.”
Double D’s frustrated expression intensified at this, “Then enlighten me, Eddy. Why would you feel the need to…um, to…uh…”
He trailed off as his gaze turned towards the line of customers, his angered visage rapidly being replaced by one of panicked terror as his eyes widened and his arms fell limply by his side, his jaw soon falling slack also. Eddy arched an eyebrow, waving his hand in front of his friend’s face – an action which yielded no response whatsoever. Snorting derisively, he readied himself to make a snide remark when his attention was drawn back towards the cider stand by the sound of a customer ringing the service bell that rested on the counter.
“Another customer!” he squealed excitedly. Hurriedly returning behind the counter of the stall, he slicked his hair back and put on his most businesslike air of authority.
“Greetings, and welcome to Eds’ Cider Stand!” he began confidently, his eyes calmly shut, “How may I help y-”
As Eddy opened his eyes, he swore he could have felt the words die right in his mouth, the instantaneous cessation of a sentence that would never have the privilege of being spoken.
Stood right before him on the opposite side of the counter was none other than Applejack, a pair of saddlebags resting on her back and her face twisted into an expression of immeasurable anger.
Eddy froze, completely and utterly lost as for what to say or do. Twilight soon came trotting up to them, standing besides Double D with a look of bewilderment.
“What’s going on here?” she asked.
There were several seconds of tense silence. Taking in a deep breath, Applejack unleashed an infuriated sigh before she finally spoke.
“Twilight…could ya please explain t’ me why ah’ve got the second coming of the Flim Flam Brothers standin’ right in front of me?” she snarled through gritted teeth.
Now Twilight was even more confused, “Wait, what?”
She turned to Double D, hoping for an answer.
Double D slowly closed his mouth and gently rubbed his temples, steadying his nerves before explaining, “Eddy stole the Apple Family’s excess cider intended for the off-season months. He’s been selling it back to the citizens of Ponyville at an inflated price.”
Twilight’s jaw hung low at this, her mind struggling to comprehend what she had just heard as disbelief washed over her, “Wait…he did what?”
Eddy took a step back and raised his hands defensively, “Hey, don’t look at me! Ed was the one who nabbed the cider barrels from the cellar!”
Ed suddenly looked mortified at this, turning to face Applejack and pointing a finger accusingly at Eddy, “Don’t look at me! I was only doing what Eddy told me to! It was all his idea, honest!”
Eddy turned to face Ed, giving him a disgusted look, “Why, of all the dirty, rotten, backstabbing-”
“That’s enough, both of you!” Twilight yelled, silencing both of them in an instant.
Applejack closed her eyes for a moment and placed her hoof against her chest, taking several deep, calming breaths. When she reopened her eyes, she nodded towards Ed and gestured towards the barrels with her foreleg.
“Ed…as a rough estimate, how many barrels’ worth of cider did you guys sell?”
Ed placed his hands behind his back and gently kicked at the ground with his foot, saying nothing.
“Ed, please,” she pleaded, “How many barrels?”
He looked up towards her ashamedly, swallowing hard before admitting, “Uh…about four.”
Applejack sighed and let her hoof drop back to the ground, shaking her head.
“Alright…that’s more than ah would have liked, but still less than what ah was expecting,” she looked down at the ground thoughtfully for several moments, before turning back towards Ed and Eddy with a grim scowl.
“Okay, so here’s what’s gonna happen. You guys are gonna lug those excess barrels of cider back over to Sweet Apple Acres and put ‘em back in the cider cellar. Once you’ve done that, ya’ll are gonna work the farm until you replenish the stock you sold. In addition to that, ya’ll are gonna return every last bit ya swindled from the townsfolk back to ‘em.”
She took another deep breath before concluding, “In return for all this, ah’m gonna refrain from pinnin’ ya’ll down and beatin’ the ever-lovin’ tar outta ya for stealin’ mah family’s property right out from under our muzzles. Does that sound like a fair deal?”
Ed began to sheepishly nod, while Eddy shook his head in horror.
“What are you, nuts? There’s no way I’m letting you take my profits!” he suddenly grabbed the sack full of bits and leapt back, “You’ll never take me alive!”
He darted past Ed and the cider barrels as he attempted to escape, while Applejack just growled and narrowed her eyes at him.
“Oh no, you don’t!” she yelled, reaching into her saddlebags and pulling out her lasso.
She twirled the rope in the air for a few brief moments, before using it to ensnare Eddy around the waistline. Eddy yelped in shock as the lasso tightened around his midsection, before dropping to the ground with a defeated grunt, the sack of bits slipping from his hands and landing close by.
Applejack trotted past Eddy – the end of the rope still firmly clenched in her mouth – and began to drag him along as he clawed helplessly at the ground. After a few moments she paused, before turning towards Ed and nodding at him.
“C’mon, big fella. You as well,” she said.
Picking up a cider barrel, Ed carefully balanced it on his back and slowly made his way towards them, his head hung low in shame all the while.
As Twilight and Double D watched them go, they turned to face the line of customers still waiting at the front of the counter, each one bearing mixed expressions of either shock, disgust, or a combination of the two.
“Well, it looks like your friends haven’t done themselves any favours,” Twilight observed.
Double D simply groaned in response.
The two of them stood there in silence for a while, watching as the crowd slowly began to disperse. Eventually, Double D turned towards Twilight and said, “Come on, we should probably go pick up those goods you came to purchase.”
Twilight nodded, replying, “Yeah, that’s…that’s probably a good idea.”
As they resumed their journey towards the marketplace, Double D stopped for a moment to give one last look at his companions’ ramshackle stall.
“Some things never change, I suppose…” he muttered, sighing despondently.
The warm evening sun was now slowly beginning to set over Ponyville, blanketing the town in a stunning golden light. Sat inside Twilight’s library, Double D was curled up in the lobby’s reading chair once again, now nearing the end of the book he had started earlier that day. Just as was about to begin reading the final page, however, he was suddenly torn from his literary rapture by a resounding knock from the library’s front door.
“I’ll get it!” Twilight called out, trotting from the kitchen over to the front door. As she flung the door open with her magic, she raised her eyebrows in surprise as she saw Applejack stood a few feet outside, with Ed and Eddy stood close by.
“Oh! Hey, Applejack! What brings you here at this time?” Twilight asked, eyeing the two miscreant Eds curiously. “They can’t be done repaying their debt already…can they?”
“Well, that’s just the thing,” Applejack explained, “Y’see…ah reckon that Ed here’s got the might of six grown stallions, give or take. Why, with his help we managed to not only replace the four barrels’ worth of cider these two sold off to the townsponies, but we even ended up making a couple of extra barrels too!”
“That’s great news!” Twilight exclaimed.
Applejack nodded, continuing, “Ah also spoke to some of the folks around town, tried to see if ah could get ‘em to forgive these numbskulls for what they did. Whether or not they will is another thing entirely, however…”
By this point Double D had joined Twilight’s side in the doorway, and at this remark he fixed Applejack with a perplexed look.
“Huh? Pardon me, Applejack, but why would you try and clear their names for such a misdeed, even after all the duress they put you through?” he inquired, pausing before quickly adding, “Not that I don’t greatly appreciate it, mind you…”
Applejack blushed and looked away bashfully, “Ah, shoot. It were kinda hard to feel mad at ‘em after they put in so much work trying to make up for what they did,” she stopped for a moment, before turning to glare at Eddy and adding, “Well, for all the work Ed put in, anyways…”
Eddy folded his arms and stuck his tongue out at her, before turning away with an indignant grunt.
Applejack just sighed and shook her head, turning back to Twilight as she continued.
“Ah also felt kinda sorry for ‘em, considerin’ that they’re stranded in a completely different world to their own right now. Ah mean, goin’ through somethin’ like that can lead somepony to do all sorts of crazy things without thinking ‘em through, y’know?”
Suddenly, she trotted over to Eddy, scowling as she leant right up to his face.
“But let’s get one thing straight, ya hear?” she growled, “If ya’ll try a stunt like that again…ah swear, ah will make ya regret it. Do ah make mahself clear?”
Eddy gulped and nodded, raising his hands cautiously, “Y-yes, ma’am.”
Applejack smiled and took a step back, quickly returning to her jovial demeanour.
“Good. Now if ya excuse me, it’s almost suppertime, so ah’d best be gettin’ back to the farm,” she turned to face back towards Double D and Twilight and nodded, “See ya’ll later!”
And with that she was gone, cheerfully cantering away towards Sweet Apple Acres.
Ed and Eddy swiftly made their way towards the library’s front door, entering the building after Double D and Twilight. Once they were all inside, Twilight closed the door behind them with her magic, and turned to face the trio of Eds.
“Man, what a slave driver!” Eddy complained, cricking his back and grunting, “That was even worse than the time we had to work for Rolf!”
“Aw, come on, Eddy! I thought it was fun!” Ed quipped, clapping his hands together gleefully.
Eddy glared at Ed and commented, “You’d probably have fun watching paint dry, Lumpy!”
“In any case,” Twilight said, interrupting their banter, “Did you learn anything from your experience today, Eddy?”
“Yes, I’m sure today’s events were rather…educational, to say the least,” Double D added.
Eddy cast his gaze away from the others and groaned.
“Yeah, I learnt somethin’, alright. If you’re gonna pilfer someone else’s goods and sell ‘em as your own, make sure ya don’t get caught in the act,” he grumbled.
Double D facepalmed and shook his head, “Oh, Eddy…”
Twilight just furrowed her brow and remarked, “Huh…well that wasn’t quite what I was expecting. I mean, it’s not really the sort of thing I could put in a letter to the Princess, now, is it?”
The Eds all stopped instantly at the mention of the Princess, slowly turning to face Twilight with looks of wary puzzlement. After a few moments of silence, Double D spoke up.
“…I beg your pardon? Twilight, what exactly do you mean by ‘letter to the Princess’?
Twilight’s eyes widened as realisation hit her like a piano to the head, “Wait…I never mentioned it to you?”
Double D arched his eyebrow, and as he spoke his voice was clearly filled with apprehension, “Never mentioned what to us, Twilight?”
“I, uh…I’m sort of, uh…Princess Celestia’s star pupil. I guess you could say that I’m her protégé, in a way. That’s kind of why I live in Ponyville, actually. She sent me here from Canterlot so that I could make friends and learn about the magic of friendship; whenever I learn something new I’m supposed to send her letters informing her of what I’ve learnt, in order to prove that I’m progressing in my studies,” she explained, nervously noting the Eds’ increasingly vexed expressions.
After another discomforting period of silence, Double D spoke up once again.
“…you mean to say that all this time, you could have sent a letter to Princess Celestia herself…one of the ruling diarchs of this land, a being with potentially untold powers, and someone who is more likely than anyone else to aid us in finding a way home…and you never even once considered informing us of this?” he stated with a calm demeanour, though it was quite clear from the tone of his voice that he was feeling anything but.
Twilight flinched as she took a step back, her ears drooping as she looked away bashfully, “I-I’m so sorry…I honestly can’t believe I never thought to tell you guys about this. I guess I just got so caught up with you guys being here, I never considered that the solution to our problem was right before my eyes. I’m sorry.”
Double D took in a deep breath, visibly relaxing as he exhaled.
“That’s…that’s quite understandable, Twilight. We all tend to make mistakes now and then, I suppose,” he admitted, smiling softly.
Twilight returned the smile, before quickly standing at full attention, “Don’t worry, guys. I promise I’ll make this up to you. I’ll get a letter sent to the Princess right away, informing her of the situation.”
She quickly cupped a hoof to her mouth and called upstairs, “Spike! Spike, could you come downstairs a moment?”
Spike soon appeared at the top of the stairs, stretching his arms in the air and yawning; Twilight frowned as she saw this.
“Wait a second…are you telling me that you actually slept through the whole day?”
Spike gave her a dumbfounded look, “When I said I was going back to bed for the rest of the day, I meant it. Did you really think I’d make something like that up?”
Twilight looked disturbed, commenting “You…but I…that’s just…” before simply sighing and shaking her head, “Never mind…Spike, could you help me write a letter to the Princess telling her about our situation with the Eds?”
Spike recoiled as he reached the bottom of the stairs, and he turned to Twilght with a look of confusion, “Wait…you mean to tell me you haven’t done that already? How could you forget to do something so important? Not to mention something so obvious.”
“That’s what we were thinking!” Eddy remarked.
Twilight glared at him, but elected to say nothing. Instead, she nodded towards the kitchen doorway and said, “Come on, Spike. Let’s go get that letter written.”
As the two of them made their way into the kitchen, Eddy scowled and turned to face Ed and Double D.
“So all this time she could have just sent a letter to that Princess-whoever and gotten us home right away, and instead she completely forgot she could do that? Talk about getting your priorities straight…”
Double D looked towards Eddy sadly and remarked, “To be honest with you, Eddy, I’m not entirely happy about this turn of events either…but what’s done is done, I suppose. I mean, at least she’s trying to rectify her mistake now, right?”
Before the trio could continue their conversation, they were interrupted by the sound of the front door being flung open. They turned to face the doorway and saw a pristine white unicorn trotting into the room, her mane a vivid indigo and her haunch bearing a cutie mark comprised of a triad of diamonds.
“Twilight, where are you? I’m terribly sorry to barge in on you like this, but I really need…oh, my!” she began, stopping as soon as she noticed the three Eds stood in the centre of the room.
“Oh, I’m so, so sorry about this! Please forgive me…I do hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“No, not at all,” Double D assured her, “I take it you’re one of Twilight’s friends, correct?”
“That is indeed correct, though I am rather surprised that you don’t seem to remember me. I believe we met at that little soirée Pinkie Pie hosted the other day?”
Double D scratched his chin in thought for a moment, before his eyes widened in realisation.
“Of course, I remember now! You’re Rarity, that unicorn who runs the boutique over by the park, yes?” he exclaimed.
Rarity smiled and nodded, “That’s absolutely correct, darling. I am Rarity, Ponyville’s premiere fashion designer, creator of all that is chic, unique and magnifique. In fact, that’s actually why I’m here right now…you see, I’m currently in the midst of creating an outfit for a client based on some of the designs that were once used back in the pre-classical era. I was hoping to ask Twilight for a book relating to the subject, so that I may use it as a reference for my own designs.”
Double D smiled, “Well, I could help you, if you like. Twilight’s otherwise preoccupied at this current moment in time, so I’d be more than happy to help you find what you’re looking for.”
“Thank you most sincerely, Eddward.”
“Please, call me Double D. Almost everyone does.”
“Alright, then…thank you, ‘Double D’,” she winked, giggling.
Double D chuckled in return and made his way towards the bookshelf, leaving Rarity to speak with the other two Eds. She turned to face Eddy, carefully looking him up and down.
“I’m supposing that you would be Eddy, is that correct?”
Eddy struck a pose and pressed his thumb against his chest, beaming proudly, “The one and only!” He paused for a moment before adding, “Want my autograph?”
Rarity raised her eyebrow quizzically, “Er…perhaps some other time, darling…”
Shaking her head, she turned to face Ed with a cheerful smile, “Then by process of elimination, that would lead me to assume that you must be Eh…must be…Eeehhh…”
She rapidly trailed off, her eyes widening in horror as she quickly clamped a hoof over her muzzle and pursed her lips, “Good grief! What is that absolutely repulsive odour?!” she shrieked.
Ed grinned happily and carefully reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out the most ungodly and repugnant block of pressed milk curd known to creation.
“Aw, that’s just my lucky cheese chunk, Sheldon!” he chirped gleefully, momentarily tapping his chin in thought before remembering to add, “…um, junior.”
Had her fur not already been white, the sight of Sheldon Junior would have drained Rarity of all her colour an in instant. Her pupils shrank as she quickly slammed her eyes shut and moved her hoof over mouth, placing all her effort into ensuring that the meals she had consumed earlier that day didn’t decide to make a hasty retreat in the direction from whence they came.
Eddy shot Ed a look of pure revulsion and yelled, “Oh, jeez! Not that stupid cheese chunk again! Ed, put that thing away before it stinks the whole library out, you numbskull!”
Ed glared at Eddy as he carefully placed Sheldon Junior back into his pocket once more.
“You’re just jealous that you don’t have a lucky cheese chunk, Eddy,” Ed protested, folding his arms and sticking out his tongue.
Rarity slowly reopened her eyes and placed her hoof over her chest, coughing delicately before taking several deep breaths. Eventually, she turned towards Double D with a look of pure bewilderment.
“Goodness, gracious me…how do you cope with the fact that he carries that…that thing around in his pocket on a daily basis?” she wheezed.
Standing by the bookcase, Double D placed the book that was in his hands back on the shelf and gave her a sympathetic look, “It’s something that you eventually grow accustomed to, I suppose…”
Eddy shut his eyes and shuddered, “Yeah, don’t I know it…” he muttered.
Double D nodded and continued, “Ultimately, however, minor trivialities such as these become part and parcel when in the presence of someone like Ed, especially given the rest of his demeanour,” he turned back to the bookshelf and continued his search for Rarity’s book.
Upon hearing this, Rarity turned back to Ed and gave him a swift once-over, tensely noting his unkempt appearance and how the rancid, pungent stench of body odour still permeated her nostrils – even without the aid of the rotting lump of curd resting in his pocket.
“Yes, I-I can see that quite clearly...” Rarity admitted, “While I must say that Ed has a rather, er…unique style in regards to how he dresses, I feel as though I must inquire…have you ever tried doing anything new in relation to your appearance, Ed?”
Ed curled his hand into a fist and placed against his chest, beaming proudly, “Nope! Been wearing the same ol’ shirt and slacks since the day I got ‘em, yup.”
Rarity’s left eye began to twitch slightly as she processed this new information, but with great diligence she still managed to retain her overall composure.
“I see…well, why don’t you allow me to try making you some ‘new threads’, as it were? A change is as good as a rest, so goes the old saying, and I’m sure that conjuring up something eye-catching and appealing to suit someone of your stature would prove to be a rather enjoyable challenge. What do you say?”
Ed placed his hand on his chin for a moment, slowly drumming his fingers against his chin as he contemplated this. Eventually he raised his arm triumphantly in the air, index finger outstretched as he proudly proclaimed, “Sounds good to me, whatever you just said!”
Double D soon wandered back towards the group, holding the book out to Rarity, “I believe this is what you’re looking for?”
Rarity levitated the book into the air with her magic, smiling warmly as she did so.
“Perfect! Thank you ever so much for your help, Double D. I truly appreciate it,” she turned to Ed and continued, “And you, dear fellow, can meet me at Carousel Boutique tomorrow morning. I assure you, by the time I’m done with you, you will look simply divine! Now, I really must get going. Farewell!”
With the book in tow, Rarity turned towards the entrance doorway and exited the library, slowly closing the door behind her with her magic as she went. Mere moments after her departure, Twilight and Spike walked back into the room, a scroll clenched tightly in the latter’s claw.
“What’s with all the commotion in here?” asked Twilight.
“Ah, that was Rarity stopping by. Apparently she was looking for a book on the cultural trends of the pre-classical era, to help her in designing an outfit for a client. Of course, I offered her my assistance in your stead, seeing as you two were rather busy at the time,” Double D explained.
Twilight smiled and began to respond, but Spike immediately cut her off.
“Hold it, hold it, hold it! Are you telling me that Rarity came over here for a visit, and you never bothered to let me know?” he cried in disbelief.
“My apologies, Spike…I didn’t realise you were hoping to speak with Rarity. I’ll be sure to inform you of her next visit.”
Spike grunted and folded his arms as he glanced away, “Would’ve been nicer if you’d told me about this one…”
Noticing the scroll grasped firmly in Spike’s claw, Double D pointed to it and asked, “I take it that this is the letter we’re sending to Princess Celestia, then?”
Twilight shook her head and simply said, “Nope, this one’s her response.”
Seeing Double D’s bemused expression, she clarified “I send letters to the Princess via magical fire, such as the green dragon fire that Spike can breathe; the Princess sends her responses to me in a similar manner. It’s the quickest and most efficient way for us to transmit messages to one another.”
Double D nodded in understanding, while Ed softly murmured a dragged-out “cool”.
Eddy groaned and slapped a hand against his forehead, “Augh, enough yammering already! What does the letter say, anyways?”
Double D just gave him a wearisome look, “Patience is a virtue, Eddy…though I must admit, I am rather curious as well.”
Twilight nodded curtly, “Alright, then. Let’s see what it says.”
Levitating the scroll out from under Spike’s claw, Twilight unfurled it in mid-air and cleared her throat as she began to read aloud:
My dear Twilight,
I am most thankful for your letter informing me of what has happened, though I do wish that you had notified me of these events sooner. At this present time, my sister and I are rather preoccupied, as we are currently engaged in political discussions with some royal dignitaries from Saddle Arabia. As you can probably guess, this means that I am sadly unable to see you at this time.
However, I will be free to speak to you in two days, once the discussions have concluded. I will send a chariot over to Ponyville to collect you and the Eds and bring you all back to Canterlot then. You may also bring your Ponyville friends along with you, if you so desire. I look forward to seeing you, and I feel as though we will have much to discuss.
Yours sincerely, Princess Celestia
There was a brief pause as Twilight quietly gave the letter a mumbled once-over to herself, before lowering it and turning her attention towards the Eds.
“So we’re basically stuck here for another two days?” Eddy groaned, wrapping his arms over his head and dramatically flopping down onto his back.
“That appears to be the case,” Double D confirmed, “Still, I suppose some progress is better than none at all.”
Double D suddenly yawned, hastily covering his mouth after doing so, “Goodness…it is getting rather late, isn’t it? Perhaps we should call it a day.”
Eddy stretched and yawned as he got to his feet, “I’m with ya there, Sockhead. I’m beat.”
Double D turned to Ed and nodded, “Ed, you’d best head over to Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie and the Cakes will likely be expecting you back by now, and you’ll need a good night’s rest if you’re planning on visiting Rarity tomorrow morning.”
Spike suddenly snapped to attention, turning to face Ed with a look of pure shock.
“What? Not only did I miss out on a visit from Rarity, but Ed got invited to go see her? What’s up with that?!”
Eddy turned to Spike with a smug grin and teased, “What’s wrong, Casanova? Afraid ol’ monobrow here’s gonna steal your girlfriend?”
Spike’s pupils dilated, and he began to blush furiously, “I-I…I…she’s not my…ugh, I mean, I…AUGH!”
He angrily stomped off upstairs as the others watched with varying levels of concern. When he reached the top of the stairs, he snorted and made his way into the bedroom; he slammed the bedroom door shut behind him, causing everyone else to wince at the impact of the door. Twilight turned to Eddy and gave him a disapproving look.
“Gee, Eddy…ever heard of something called ‘tact’?”
Eddy gave her a confused look and asked, “Uh…ain’t that a type of breath-mint or somethin’?”
Twilight sighed and shook her head, while Double D simply rolled his eyes and turned back towards Ed.
“As I was saying…you’d best be setting off back to Sugarcube Corner, Ed. You wouldn’t want Pinkie and the Cakes to get worried now, would you?
“Yeah! Scram, will ya? Some of us want to go get some shut-eye,” Eddy remarked, yawning as he rubbed his eye.
Ed grinned and nodded, waving goodbye to his friends as he made his way towards the door, “Alrighty, then! See you later, alligator!”
As he exited the building, he could be heard chuckling softly and faintly murmuring something along the lines of “Hey…that rhymed too!”
As Ed closed the door behind him, Double D turned back to the others. Each of them let out a hearty yawn and, after a brief pause, slowly began making their way upstairs – all of them looking forward to finally getting some much needed rest after the tiring events of the day.
She stared at the individual that stood before her with a determined look of appraisal, eyeing every inch of it's being with unrelenting scrutiny. She noticed something curious atop its head, something that caught her eye – and at once, she reviled that such a thing existed there to draw her attention. It was an absolute disgrace to everything she stood for, yet something so understated that anyone else would have simply overlooked it. Not her, however.
Frowning slightly, Rarity lifted her manebrush into the air with her magic and levitated it over to her mane, carefully using it to brush an out-of-place strand of hair she had spied in the mirror. Placing the brush back atop the cabinet, she turned to face the mirror once more and gave herself another swift once-over, this time seemingly satisfied with her outward appearance.
Before she could continue, however, her visual self-evaluation was abruptly cut short by the chime of the entrance doorbell echoing up from the floor below.
“Just one moment, and I'll be right with you!” she called downstairs.
She turned to face the doorway and gave a curious glance towards the clock that rested above it. Noting the time, she raised her eyebrows slightly with mild surprise.
“Hmm...I must admit, I wasn't expecting him to arrive quite so early,” she remarked, though she smiled softly as she continued, “Then again, I suppose I should commend him on his punctuality.”
Rarity trotted over to the door, exiting her bedroom and swiftly making her way downstairs. As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she noticed Ed standing near the building’s main entrance, an idle expression on his face as he curiously regarded a nearby mannequin. Rarity let out a polite cough, quickly garnering Ed’s attention as he turned to her with a lopsided grin.
“Oh! Pardon me, miss,” he remarked. He then gestured as though to lift an invisible top hat from atop his head, adding “Just call me ‘Charmin Marvin’!”
Rarity placed a hoof to her mouth and stifled a small giggle, commenting “It’s good to see you too, Ed. I must say, you’re here rather early. Any particular reason why?”
Ed tapped his chin in thought, before replying “I sleep-walked this morning and ate some food from the Cakes’ fridge while I was asleep. The Cakes woke up and got pretty mad at me when they found out, so they kicked me out of the bakery for the day. So, I thought I’d come here early.”
Rarity seemed a bit taken aback by this, “That seems like something of an over-reaction to me. Why would they kick you out of the bakery just for that alone?”
Ed nervously looked down at the ground and kicked it softly as he admitted, “I, uh…I kinda emptied the whole fridge,” he paused and then added, “And ate everything in the pantry, too.”
Rarity quickly garnered a look of worried understanding, “Ah…I see. I suppose that is a rather, er…unfortunate way to start the day for all involved.”
There was an awkward silence between the two for a few brief moments following Ed’s unsettling revelation. Eventually, Rarity cleared her throat and spoke aloud.
“…in any case, what say we begin working on your new outfit now, yes?”
Ed looked back up at Rarity as his expression quickly switched to one of delight, and he hastily made his way onto the nearby platform that was surrounded by a trio of mirrors. Rarity briskly trotted over to a nearby drawer, opening it with her magic and levitating out a piece of measuring tape. Closing the drawer, she made her way over to Ed and unfurled the tape as she began taking a measurement of his torso.
“Cool! What’s this for?” Ed remarked with inquisitive interest.
Rarity smiled at this, narrowing her eyes in concentration as she explained, “I’m going to need to take a few measurements first before we can start designing your outfit, seeing as it’s going to be tailored specifically to fit you…not to mention that I’ve never designed an outfit for a member of your species before. Oh, could you lift your arms for a few moments, please? I’ll need to take a horizontal measurement as well.”
Ed complied immediately, lifting his arms so that they were outstretched horizontally at his sides. Rarity levitated the measuring tape over to his arms and started to take the required measurements, but abruptly ceased as she daintily sniffed the air. Her pupils dilated in an instant, and she immediately clamped a hoof over her muzzle to barricade her nostrils from the relentless assault they had been unexpectedly placed under.
“Oh, my Celestia! That…that stench! It’s…it’s…” Rarity gagged, shuddering as she mentally tried to determine what, if anything, the sudden nasal onslaught could be compared to.
Glancing up to face Ed, Rarity took in a deep breath and said, “Ed…I apologise if this sounds a tad rude, but when was the last time you bathed yourself?”
Ed lifted his head and stared at the wall on the other side of the room with an absentminded expression. He began to perform a variety of richly complex mental calculations, desperately trying to determine just how long it had been since he had last bathed himself; after attempting this for a good minute or so, he eventually conceded the task as impossible to complete, and he turned back to Rarity with a blank look on his face.
“Uh…I forget.”
Rarity sighed and shook her head, before turning to face Ed with a faint scowl.
“Well, this simply will not do at all. Ed, I implore you…please go and wash yourself this instant, ensuring that you make proper use of the soap and other toiletries in the washroom as you do s-”
“SOAP!” Ed screamed, recoiling and taking a precautionary step backwards as he fearfully bellowed the word.
Rarity gave him a puzzled look, “Er…yes, soap. Is there something wrong with that?”
“Soap is bad for Ed! It’s evil! Foul! Cruel! A…a detestable detergent of slippery, sudsy doom!” he yelled, protectively waving his arms in front of his body as though to shield himself from the mere concept of the thing.
Rarity continued to stare at him quizzically, mentally querying how one could possibly consider soap and detergent to be one and the same. Shaking her head, she sighed and stared back at him with a stern look.
“You can’t possibly be serious, Ed! You need to wash and clean yourself on a regular basis, or else you’ll find yourself covered in a wide menagerie of filth and germs,” she stopped for a moment, before shuddering and mumbling to herself “Not to mention the rather pungent odour you’ve acquired…”
Ed frowned and folded his arms, closing his eyes as he turned his head away indignantly, “Nuh-uh, no way! Soap and me are not to be!”
“But…but Ed!”
He grunted and said nothing.
“…Ed?”
Still he remained silent.
“Edward.”
His eyes shot open, and he glanced at Rarity with a terrified expression. His lower lip quivered almost imperceptibly, yet he still remained steadfast in his resolve for several moments more. Eventually he sighed and hunched over as he bore a defeated look on his face.
“Okay. I’ll go wash…” he muttered sadly.
Ed climbed down from the platform, and Rarity immediately felt a pang of guilt upon seeing the crestfallen expression on his face. Gritting her teeth, she sighed and gave Ed a sympathetic look.
“Alright…perhaps you don’t have to use soap, if you really don’t want to…” she said, mentally screaming at herself for even daring to say such a thing.
Ed suddenly turned back to her with a hopeful look, but she continued before he could say anything.
“However…I do insist that you at least give yourself a decent wash later today, even if there is to be no soap involved.”
Ed nodded and grinned, “I can do that, no problem!”
Rarity smiled in return, “Excellent! Now, if you’ll follow me, we can set about designing your new outfit.”
Rarity trotted over to the staircase and began ascending the stairs, Ed lightly chuckling as he followed close behind. Once they reached the top of the stairs, Rarity trotted over to a nearby door and nudged it open with her hoof, then entered the room herself. Ed made his way in shortly after, and his eyes widened in awe as he gazed upon the contents of the room.
Before him was a moderately-sized room with an arched ceiling and a brown chequered floor, the walls adorned with small lavender columns that rested between each of the room’s windows. A medium-sized bed rested near one of the walls, and a table with a sewing machine sitting atop it was placed close to the room’s entrance. The room was filled with all sorts of accoutrements, with various different types of fabrics scattered nigh everywhere without rhyme or reason and an array of hastily-sketched dress designs pinned up in several locations around the room.
“Whoa, cool! What is this place?” Ed asked, fervently glancing around in excited wonder.
“This is what I like to call my ‘Inspiration Room’,” replied Rarity as she made her way over to a nearby cabinet, “It’s where I both design and create the majority of my work, and generally my go-to place when I’m either seeking inspiration or feeling particularly inspired when designing an outfit. It also happens to be where I store the majority of my work supplies.”
She opened the drawer with her magic and levitated out a pencil and paper, placing them both down onto the cabinet before closing the drawer again. Staring thoughtfully at the paper for a moment, she levitated the pencil into the air and began to twirl it in consideration, humming quietly to herself as she did so. Ed quickly made his way over to her side, and she turned to face him expectantly.
“Now, then,” she began, “I’m going to need a bit of help here designing your outfit. You see, while I could create something generic to fit your figure with relative ease, I feel as though you would likely prefer something that feels a bit more personalised. Would that be correct?”
Ed nodded, glancing over at the sheet of paper with great intrigue.
Smiling, Rarity continued, “Indeed. That is why I require your assistance in regards to the design; knowing of any interests or hobbies you enjoy partaking in will allow me to create something that blends with your own unique personality, giving the outfit that extra degree of individuality. So, with that in mind…what interests do you happen to enjoy in your spare time, Ed?”
He continued to stare at the paper for several moments more, rubbing his hand against his chin as he squinted thoughtfully, “Well, I like to watch monster movies sometimes, and read comic books, and-”
Suddenly he turned back to face Rarity, his expression one of childlike delight.
“Ooh, I know!” he exclaimed, leaping back a few feet as he raised his arms in the air in a zombie-like fashion. “Have you ever read the issue of ‘Decaying Corpses from Planet X’ where they discover an abandoned laboratory containing an irradiated toaster? In it, the monster charges around the city without control, letting out a booming outcry of rage as he gores his victims to death...like this!”
Rarity’s eyes widened in horror as Ed suddenly made his way around the room, erratically grabbing different pieces of fabric and hurling them to and fro. Every so often he would let out a strange and disorienting cry of fury, and the entire time he moved in a manner akin to that of those infamous shambling corpses.
Rarity watched this display go on for a short while, before shaking her head as another one of Ed’s overenthusiastic imitation-roars quickly snapped her from her stupefied trance. She clenched her teeth and, with a great deal of effort, lifted Ed into the air with her magic before levitating him over to her side. Placing him down on the ground again, she panted with exertion as the shimmering light from her horn faded, before standing to full attention and giving Ed a scathing look.
Ed just looked at her awkwardly, eventually giving her a sheepish grin and looking down at his feet in embarrassment.
“…oops. Sorry,” he mumbled.
Rarity simply stared at him for a few moments, before turning her head and gazing out at the utter mess her inspiration room had become – or rather, the different mess to that which it had been mere minutes ago. Her eye began twitching in frustration as she slowly turned back to Ed. She was just about ready to give him an infuriated scolding when she suddenly halted and gave the room another once-over.
At once her eyes widened, and she quickly turned back to the piece of paper on the desk with an excited gasp as she levitated the pencil into the air and began rapidly sketching out an idea for an outfit design.
“IDEA!” she squealed delightedly, “Oh, this is perfect! You've just given me a wonderful idea for your outfit, Ed, and I know you’re just going to love it!”
Ed looked at her in a dumbfounded manner and scratched his head, “Wait…so you’re not mad?”
Rarity chuckled as she sketched with great zeal, replying “Well, I must admit I was a bit perturbed at first…but what you did ultimately provided me with the flash of inspiration I needed to design your outfit, so I suppose it all balances itself out in the end,” she paused for a moment, glaring at him and adding “Though I would kindly ask that you refrain from doing something like that again.” She then turned back to the paper and continued sketching.
Several seconds of frantic scribbling later and Rarity had completed her sketch. She enveloped the paper in a magical aura and lifted up to her face, giving the outline a quick visual analysis before levitating it so that Ed could see.
“There! Now, what do you think?”
Ed simply stared at the design presented before him, his jaw hung open in awe as he tried to imagine what the completed piece would look like. After several seconds of reverent silence, he finally remembered to give her his opinion.
“Awesome…” he murmured softly.
Rarity smiled and placed the sketch back onto the cabinet, “I’m glad you like it. Now…while I already have the materials required to make your outfit, it’s going to take me some time to actually put it together. So, you’ll have to find some way to amuse yourself in the meantime.”
She raised her hoof to her chin as she pondered this for a moment, before Ed suddenly interrupted her train of thought.
“Ooh! Can I watch you make it?” he said excitedly.
She gave him a cautious look, then smiled and said, “Well, I don’t see why not. I don’t normally have clients watching me put together their ensembles, but there’s a first time for everything. Why don’t you take a seat over there” – she pointed to a nearby wooden stool with her hoof – “and I’ll get started on your outfit, hmm?”
Ed grinned and nodded, then hastily made his way over to the stool and sat down. Rarity levitated the sketch back into the air and trotted over to one of her mannequins. She carefully levitated the piece of fabric draped over it with her magic, before making her way over to the sewing machine by the room’s entrance.
“You know, it’s rather funny, in a way,” she remarked as she glanced around the room, “My younger sister Sweetie Belle once did something similar to what you did, making a rather large mess of this room. Well…actually, she cleaned it up instead of making it into an even larger mess than it was before, but you get my point.”
Ed piped up at this, “You have a little sister?”
Rarity nodded as she reached the sewing machine, levitating the fabric onto the feed before placing the sketch down onto the table by the machine’s side. She tapped the power button of the machine with her hoof, and then gently began feeding the fabric along the needle.
“Why, yes. Her name is Sweetie Belle. She can be a bit of a hoof-full at times, I will admit, but I do enjoy getting to spend time with her when I can,” she said, smiling.
Ed grinned and said, “Cool! I have a baby sister, too! Her name is Sarah, and we do all sorts of fun things together, like, um, uh…” he tapped his chin thoughtfully, before beaming proudly and continuing, “We eat breakfast together sometimes! And we, uh…we…um…”
Ed slowly trailed off as his expression twisted into one of discomfort, and he began rubbing his hand against his other arm as he nervously turned his head away. Rarity continued to feed the fabric through the machine for several seconds longer, suddenly stopping when she noticed Ed’s lack of commentary. She turned around and saw his uneasy demeanour, and her brow furrowed in concern.
“…Ed? Is something the matter?” asked Rarity.
Ed gave her a troubled look but smiled faintly, then quickly looked away again. Rarity continued to frown slightly as she trotted up to him, and she looked him over with apprehension.
“Ed…if there’s something that’s bothering you, then you can tell me what it is. I mean, I shan’t pry if you really don’t want me to, but if there’s something that you feel you want to get off your chest…then I’m willing to share the burden with you.”
Ed looked at her and saw her concerned expression. Sighing, he allowed his arms to droop by his sides as he gave her a look of anguish.
“…I miss my baby sister Sarah. Me, Eddy and Double D…we’ve been stuck here for the last couple days and I haven’t been able to see her. I’m starting to miss her, and, uh…I’m kind of worried about her. I mean, I’m her big brother, and big brothers are supposed to take care of their baby sisters, but I can’t do that if I’m stuck here, and what if she’s scared or hurt because I can’t protect her and make sure she’s okay, and what if something bad happens to her because I wasn’t there to look after her, and…and…” Ed explained, growing more and more distraught as he went on until he was on the verge of tears.
Rarity simply stared at him sadly for a few moments as she watched him progressively grow more upset, before taking a step forward and gently placing her hoof reassuringly on his shoulder. Ed paused in surprise for a moment, and then suddenly wrapped Rarity into a tight hug. Rarity wheezed in shock at first, momentarily hesitating before eventually returning the hug, forcing herself to ignore his pungent body odour all the while.
After a few moments, Rarity took a step back and gave Ed a sympathetic look as she said, “I understand how you feel, Ed. If I was in your situation, I would probably be feeling the same way about my sister Sweetie Belle. However…I’m assuming you and Sarah live with your parents, do you not?”
Ed sniffed and nodded, wiping his nose against his jacket sleeve.
“Indeed. At this moment in time, Sweetie Belle is currently staying with my parents at their house. Although she isn’t with me at this current moment, I’m assured of her safety because I know that my parents are just as capable of looking after her as I am, if not more so. That being the case, you shouldn’t fear as to whether or not something bad will happen to Sarah, as I’m certain that your parents are taking care of her and making sure that she comes to no harm in the same way that you would. She will be just fine until you get back to your own world…an event which I’m sure will come to pass soon.”
Ed stared blankly at her for a few moments, before breaking out into an appreciative grin.
“…thanks, Rarity. That…that really helps,” he said.
Rarity smiled and nodded, “It’s no problem at all, darling. Now, then…” she tilted her head towards the sewing machine, “Should we return to making your outfit?”
Ed nodded vigorously, murmuring a faint “uh-huh”. Rarity nodded in return and made her way over to the sewing machine, then resumed her work.
Time passed relatively quickly after that, and as the hours flew by Ed watched Rarity with rapt attention, fascinated by the skill with which she performed her craft. On the odd occasion he would query her on a certain aspect of her work, and each time she would gladly explain the finer points of tailoring and fashion design.
Soon the outfit was complete, and Rarity took a step back as she levitated it so that it hovered a short distance from Ed.
“There we are, my dear! Your new ensemble is complete!” she exclaimed.
Ed simply gaped as he looked at the outfit that floated before him, his eyes wide with wonderment.
“Now, if you would be so kind as to try it on, I would be most grateful. As I said earlier, I’ve never really designed something for a member of your species before, so I’d just like to double-check and make sure that I got the measurements right. Is that okay with you?”
Ed nodded slowly, his mouth still agape with admiration. Eventually he snapped from his astonished stupor and blushed faintly, before taking the clothes from Rarity and hastily making his way behind the dressing screen on the opposite side of the room.
Rarity smiled and shook her head, turning away as she started to tidy away some of the materials she had used. She had scarcely begun, however, when Ed called back out to her.
“Okay, I’m ready!”
Rarity turned to face Ed as he stepped out from behind the screen, and she froze as she witnessed him garbed in her newest creation. She stammered momentarily as she tried to form a coherent sentence, then her jaw fell slack in amazement as she wordlessly levitated the nearby full-body mirror over to Ed so he could see.
Ed’s eyebrows lifted in surprise, and he looked himself over in awe as he took in the sight of himself wearing his new outfit. He slowly worked his jaw as his mind attempted to find the words to describe what he saw, with it ultimately deciding that there was only one statement sufficient to summarise the sheer magnificence of what he saw before him.
“Whoa, cool!”
The sun descended behind the landscape of the horizon, basking the town of Ponyville in a soothing orange glow as yet another day brought itself to a close.
Rarity and Ed were slowly making their way towards the Golden Oaks Library, with the latter now dressed in his usual attire once more. Though he had admired how he appeared in his new outfit, Ed’s attachment to the garments he had grown so accustomed to over the years ultimately proved too strong for him to abandon them entirely, and he had thus opted to continue wearing his old clothes instead. He’d also found fault with how the new outfit seemed to lack pockets, and therefore deprived him of a place to keep Sheldon Junior throughout the day – an aspect of the design that Rarity had secretly hoped he would fail to notice.
As they approached the library, they heard what sounded like laughter echoing from within its walls. Sharing a confused look, they made their way over to the door and entered the library. Their eyes widened as they made their way into the room and witnessed Double D sitting in the reading chair of the library; he bore several scrapes along his arm and an ice pack rested atop his ski hat, the latter object held carefully in place by his hand. The source of the laughter was none other than Eddy, who stood by the armchair’s side and was beside himself with amusement.
“Oh, man, Sockhead!” he chuckled, “That was just…priceless! I mean, the way you just…it was…”
He broke out into riotous laughter again as he hunched over and placed his hands on his knees, while Double D rolled his eyes in disdain.
“Ha, ha, ha...yes, Eddy. This all so very amusing, isn’t it?” he grumbled, wincing as a sharp jolt of pain coursed through his head.
Eddy wiped a tear of laughter from his eye and turned to face Double D. He opened his mouth as though to respond, before sniggering and then suddenly breaking out into hearty laughter once more.
Double D simply sighed and groaned, turning his gaze towards the doorway. Noticing Ed and Rarity, he smiled and raised his free arm in a gesture of acknowledgement.
“Ah, there you two are! I didn’t hear you come in. Tell me, how were things today?” he said. He paused in confusion for a moment, before frowning as he continued “Wait a moment…why isn’t Ed wearing his new outfit? What happened?”
Rarity dramatically placed a hoof against her head and wailed, “The world…nay, the entirety of creation…is not prepared for such levels of fabulosity!”
Ed gave them a sheepish look and added, “Plus, I kinda liked my old clothes better.”
Double D nodded, wincing as the action caused him another jolt of pain, “Ouch! Fair enough, I suppose. Though I do feel it’s a shame to let a new outfit go to waste like that…”
Dropping her hoof to the ground, Rarity looked over at Double D with concern, “But enough about us, dear. Whatever happened to you? You look absolutely dreadful!”
Double D opened his mouth to respond, but a scratchy, feminine voice cut him off.
“Uh, yeah…that’s probably sorta my fault.”
They all turned to see a cerulean pegasus with a brightly-coloured rainbow mane and tail trot out of the kitchen, followed shortly by Twilight Sparkle. The former wore an embarrassed grin, while the latter was giving the pegasus a look of mild annoyance.
“Rainbow Dash? What are you doing here?” Rarity said, clearly taken aback.
“Well, it’s, uh…kind of a long story…” the pegasus admitted, turning away and bashfully rubbing one foreleg against the other.
“Yes, indeed. Though it is quite the interesting yarn, to be sure…” Double D remarked. He flinched as yet another jolt of pain pierced his cranium.
“Cool, a story? Do tell, Double D!” Ed yelled gleefully, running over to Double D and clasping his hands together in excitement.
Double D scanned the room and saw the faces of those around him, each one expressing varying levels of anticipation. Double D hesitated for a moment, then sighed and chuckled to himself mirthfully.
“Oh, all right, then. As previously mentioned, however, it is quite a long-winded story...so I would recommend that you all get comfortable.”
They all gathered around the armchair and sat down, while Double D gently scratched his chin in contemplation.
“Now, let’s see here…our tale begins earlier today, right here in this very library. It was just after breakfast, and I had been aiding Twilight in locating a certain book she required for her latest essay…”
