clopopatra
Joined 8th Apr, 2019 ·
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*starts reading in public*
*gets to Twilight and Night Light's dirty talk*
Nope. Nuh uh. Not now, not unless I wanna have an uncomfortable day.
Well if it wasnt for gay porn in the same scene as Night and Twilight bonding this would have been good. But this isnt my cup of tea so cant give critique as I have not read it past the part where there was supposed to be gay bj.
Bra that was awesome.
This was pretty great! I really liked the dynamic you gave the Sparkles. They each have a place in this sexual trio and it was really fun watching them play off each other (and with each other). The non-dialogue writing was a little bit clinical for my tastes, though. Don’t be afraid of simile and metaphor. Still, a really strong showing! The dialogue alone makes this one of my favored entries so far.