"Luna?" Sweetie Belle asked as she gripped onto the Alicorn's fur. They had continued to make their way through the tunnels of the Canterlot's Castle underground passage way but had been constantly only been making downward left turns, making their actual position not truly stray that much at all.
"Yes?"
"What do you think of Mister Sombra?"
"Why?" Luna asked as she arched a brow, turning her head slightly to face the filly. She had an itching suspicion Sweetie Belle was only trying to poke fun at her again, but the rather troubled expression she bore told her otherwise.
"Just wondering. It seems that just about everypony he meets wants him dead or locked up."
Sighing and keeping her pace through the corridors, Luna recalled the chat she had had with Sombra before they got separated. A weight of guilt pulled her into a pensive state. She knew very little of Sombra, but every detail she found always surprised her. Not just the mistaken identity she and her sister had given him, but just how caring he could be despite his dark powers.
"I think Sombra is a gentle stallion." Luna finally said as they made their first right turn in a while. "The care he has over you is like that of a father. A father that-"
"Would do anything for their child?" Sweetie Belle finished for her. "Mister Sombra told me that once. That a parent would stop at nothing to make sure they were okay."
"That is correct. Though it begs the question, how did you and Sombra form such a bond?"
"I don't know." Sweetie Belle said as she placed a hoof to her chin. "I guess it just happened. But now that I think about it, Mister Sombra does remind me of my dad."
"Share the same features?" Luna asked, to which she only got a short burst of giggles quickly denouncing her original thought.
"No, my dad has a mustache, Mister Sombra sideburns...really long side burns. My dad has a short blonde mane, Mister Sombra a long spiky black mane. My dad-"
"I understand. Sombra and your father are opposites."
"Only in appearance." Sweetie Belle said as she leaned down onto Luna's mane. "Whenever I'm scared or in trouble, Mister Sombra always comes running to my side to make sure I'm okay."
"I believe he is forced to do so because of the curse." Luna said hesitantly, not really willing to burst the filly's bubble.
"I thought so too, but that's not the case." Sweetie Belle said with a smile as she climbed towards Luna's head so they could talk face to face. "You see, because of the poison joke, Mister Sombra and I switched bodies for a while. Even though I was the one in it, the curse still held Mister Sombra's body accountable for the fulfilling the commands of my body."
"That must have been terrible." Luna said as she looked at the ever gleeful filly.
"Not really. Mister Sombra was extra careful to make sure I didn't get hurt because of the curse. Anyway, we got into a bit of a fight with a cragadile and everypony was in danger."
"Mhm?" She hummed, trying to get to the meat of where Sweetie Belle was going with the conversation.
"And well, Mister Sombra was in real danger for a while. He was hanging off a branch and if he fell he would have been eaten alive. Yet, I never felt the curse force me to save him. I was able to focus on my own fight at the moment until I was free to go to him."
"So you're saying that-"
"Every time Mister Sombra had come to my rescue, he did it out of his own free will." Sweetie Belle said with a large smile.
<=•=>
"Another dead end?" Sombra asked out in an annoyed tone. Taking a quick look around, he found yet another sinkable tile. No doubt it would activate a trap that would send him deeper into the maze.
He quickly jumped over it and searched the walls before looking back at the tile. There was indeed nothing going forward, the only direction left to go was down...again. Despite the strange passages, he had certainly traveled a long way, yet he still didn't feel like the curse was taking effect. There had been a few occasions where he would feel weaker, but that sensation would soon leave his body after a few moments.
"The way this is going, it seems both of us as moving in the same general direction." Sombra said as he walked back and gently pressed down on the tile, making the ground beneath him pull apart and having him fall down. "So the only options left are to out run them, or run back and hope they move away."
To escape the damage he would take from the great fall, Sombra quickly turned himself into a shadow just as he touched the ground, allowing him to come out unharmed. He pulled himself out of the ground and looked around to see the same contraption from before. Each fall had one at the bottom and they were starting to look like the traps weren't traps after all.
"I doubt going back is a viable option, especially with how much this place twists and turns, it's like a dungeon." Sombra said as he resumed his gallop across the halls, the echo of his hooves the only noise to be heard.
Sombra could feel the corridor curve right as he ran. He did his best to make a mental map of the place, but it seemed to be to no avail. The tunnels just twisted and overlapped one another. Some ended in dead ends, others in dead ends with a passage way downward. Yet now, when he was alone did he finally get some time to think.
Luna made it pretty clear. The object he had been looking for is not here, nor was it in the Princess's possession at all. That meant that his only lead was a dud. The entire reason he became king was to have the power and resources necessary to search for it. What could he do now that he was nothing more than a shadow to a filly? Albeit, a filly to happens to be friends with Princesses and sister to an Element of Harmony, but a simply child nonetheless. Why should he put her in any danger without reason?
Sombra let out a deep sigh as he came to yet another corner. Slowing down to a stop and leaning on the wall of the corner, his eyes grew dull as he thought perhaps it was best to abandon the idea all together. He was dead anyway, what use was it to pursue his goal since he would ultimately gain nothing from it?
"I just need to stop...stop and look at all the pieces I have to play with..." He said in a hushed tone. Returning his weight to his hooves and taking a deep breath, Sombra quickly regained his composure as he turned the corner finally. "Enough of that, right now I have to get Sweetie Belle out of here. If only I can- Al carajo, you've got to be kidding me."
The tunnel finally broke off into a large room. On the far end of it was a gigantic door, no doubt used for the equally large figure standing just a few meters away from it. The bipedal creature seemed to be fixated on the door, keeping his back to Sombra and leaving him undiscovered for now.
By the horns and hands, it was clearly a Minotaur. He wielded a large double -sided axe in his hands that only increased his lethalness. His armor was well decorated, but there was a strong sense of familiarity for Sombra. Meaning it was old, possibly a hand-me-down from a thousand years ago.
"Excuse me." Sombra said as he stepped forward, quickly drawing in the Minotaur's attention. He stood in silence as he looked Sombra up and down before finally turning all the way around to face him.
"Who are you?" He asked, taking a few steps forward.
"My name is Sombra, is that the way out?" Sombra asked as he gestured to the large door the Minotaur had been facing.
"It is." He responded.
"May I pass?"
"..."
They stood in silence as they stared each other down. Sombra looked around to see what he could use to his advantage if things went south, but the area around them was nothing more than a large room. No obstacles, no windows, just the one exit. Finally, the Minotaur spoke.
"I am Iron Wall, of the Iron Minotaur family. For generations my family has kept the underground of Canterlot safe from intruders. Yet here you stand, having made it past me and back."
"I didn't make it past you." Sombra quickly said as he tensed his posture from the aggressive aura the other was giving off. "I accidentally fell into the dungeon in the basement of Canterlot Castle."
"Canterlot Castle?"
"Yes. Though that door might be your entrance, it is my exit. Now I'll ask again, may I pass?"
Iron Wall stood silent once more as he looked back and forth between the door and Sombra. It was obvious he did not know what to do in the situation. Perhaps it was because it was likely nopony had ever ventured into the underground in generations, or that he simply had no policy on what to do if somepony came from the other side.
"Apologies, but I must uphold my duty to not allow anything to get by me. Nothing will go past me going in, nothing will go past me going out." Iron Wall said as he gripped his axe tightly in his hands.
"I admire the diligence you have to fulfilling your duties, but I too have obligations to fulfill to a filly. I'd rather not disappoint her." Sombra said as he slid his fore hooves on the ground to get into a battle stance.
"Then it seems we are at an impasse."
"Seems like it. How should we resolve it then?"
"You seem to be prepared for battle, so how about a duel?" Iron Wall said as he slowly began to walk to the side as if to find a weak spot to attack. Sombra mimicked him and rotated with him.
"Name your terms."
"Since neither wishes to be here all night, and this is a peculiar situation, how about the first to land a hit on the other wins?"
"Sounds fair."
Sombra and Iron Wall came to a stop once they made full circle back to their original spots. Gritting their teeth, they both charged forward in a loud roar.
<=•=>
"What is Sombra after?" Luna asked as she took a moment to choice between yet another fork in the road.
"Huh?"
"You two came to the Castle looking for something. Sombra said he wanted a stone with the power of chaos within him, yet it was only because of a rumor he had heard. In truth my sister and I have no such object. But I am still curious, what does Sombra wish to do with it?"
"Don't know." Sweetie Belle answered quickly as she too looked back and forth between the paths to take.
"What?!" Luna shouted as she looked up at the filly.
"Yeah, I didn't ask."
"Art thou mad?!" She shouted out in her Canterlot voice, once again reverting to her old speech pattern while using her magic to levitate Sweetie Belle to her fore hooves and hold her in front of her.
"There goes that voice again..." Sweetie Belle said in an annoyed whisper. "I never asked any details, though I'm sure Mister Sombra would have told me if I did."
"That is another matter all together. Why would you agree to a plan which you know nothing about?!"
"I trust Mister Sombra. He said nopony would get hurt, or rather, that it would be a good thing for Equestria."
"While I agree that Sombra does speak the truth when asked, his memories are missing. Are you aware of that?"
"Mhm."
"So what's to say that his original motive was evil, but he simply forgot over the years? What if once he acquired what he had been seeking, it turns out it was something harmful to others? What then?" Luna asked. Sweetie Belle looked at her blankly for a few seconds. She thought about it and quickly smiled softly back at her.
"I'm sure Mister Sombra would stop whatever he's doing if he found out it was wrong."
"You place a great deal of trust in Sombra." Luna said as she returned the smile before placing her back on her back.
"You should try it too. He hasn't let me down yet!" Sweetie Belle shouted as she threw a hoof out in excitement. Luna could only laugh softly at her antics and quickly picked a path at random.
The speed at which they traveled might have made it difficult for any other filly, but having been through rough rides with Sombra, Sweetie Belle could only enjoy the ride. Compared to the sudden jerking around Sombra would put her through during combat or simply maneuvering through Ponyville, this was a gentle trip despite the sharp turns and sudden stops. Though her fun came to an end when they came to yet another dead end.
"Curses, this place is a maze." Luna grunted out in frustration. Sweetie Belle ignored her remark and instead looked around intently.
"Close your mouth...Open your eyes..." She said softly as her eyes glided across every inch of the corridor. Finally they stopped at a single tile. The lining around it told her it was one of the sinkable ones that would no doubt open a door on the ground.
Smiling at her discovery, she quickly closed her eyes to concentrate. She had seen the dangers of the magic she was casting out via Sombra's demonstrations while in her body, but surely a simple shard wouldn't be too much to ask for.
Luna opened her eyes wide as she saw Sweetie Belle cast out a purple aura from her horn. It bubbled in shades of black and green as she struggled to use the magic. Suddenly a small shard of black crystal appeared in front of her. She quickly grasped it in her hooves as she tried to steady her heavy breathing.
"What are you-"
Sweetie Belle wasn't listening, instead she threw the shard down at the tile, making it sink and activating the mechanism under it. Slowly the doors opened, revealing yet another passage downward.
"Now we can get on Mister Sombra's level..." Sweetie said in a tired tone, sweat running down her face from the small exert of magic she pulled off.
"I'm sure that you'll be getting on Sombra's level very soon if you continue like that." Luna said in amazement, referring to something else entirely to what Sweetie Belle had meant. Still, by how tired the filly looked, it was no use asking her any questions. Instead, she flew down to the floor under them before the doors closed behind them.
<=•=>
Jumping back and running sideways, Sombra avoided the incoming assault of axe swings his way. Despite the large size of Iron Wall, he was rather agile, quickly closing the small distance Sombra had traveled and was right back in melee range.
Using his magic to spring forth a thin pillar of crystal, Iron Wall was forced to stop and block the attack with his free hand. Taking it as an opening, Sombra jumped up and fired a bolt of energy at him. The blast raised some dust and kept the Minotaur hidden for a few seconds and even though he had seen the attack made contact, Sombra did not count it as his victory just yet.
"You are very strong." Iron Wall said as the smoke cleared, revealing him shielded by his axe. "Truly a worthy opponent."
"You too are very well trained."
"My family used to be the strongest in Equestria. That is the entire reason why the Royalty of Canterlot asked us to keep the secret entrance safe all those years back. Though I am aware that we are probably forgotten, an Iron never breaks a contract."
"So your family has continued to train to protect this abandoned maze?" Sombra asked as he took a more relaxed stance.
"Most of my family have given up on traditions. I alone remain to guard this place. It may not be much, but I enjoy bringing honor to my family." Iron responded as he too took a pause from their battle.
"Had the circumstances been different, I might have retreated by now and allowed you to be."
"But you are bound to keep the promise you made to the filly you mentioned?"
"Interesting choice of words." Sombra said in a chuckle. "But yes. The night is going to be over soon, and she has school tomorrow. I need to get her home so she can finish her homework."
"Then let us make haste." Iron Wall said as he readied his axe again. "Let us go in all or nothing."
"Let's." Sombra said as he tensed up his muscles again.
Sombra's breathing slowed as he looked over at the Minotaur. His battle style, though very aggressive, held no real weaknesses. If he wanted to win, he would have to make a opening.
Charging forward like before, Sombra bound his hooves in crystal as he pounced out to at Iron Wall. He swung his axe at him, cracking the crystal casing but not breaking it. Sombra placed his hind legs on the ground and threw out an uppercut with his free hoof.
The attack was quickly blocked as Iron gripped it in his free hand. Both of them remained locked for a second. Quickly finding a way to attack, Iron Wall leaned back slight and then thrusted his head forward in a headbutt, the winning strike had Sombra been a normal stallion. He was not.
Sombra sunk into the ground and became a shadow. He drifted under his opponent and reemerged out with his hoof pulled back, ready to strike. As he did, he felt it grow lighter. The crystal casting finally broke, leaving on his hoof a spiky point that could easily draw blood. If he continued his attack, he could severely hurt Iron Wall.
He hesitated. It only lasted a second, but Iron Wall took advantage of the time given to him and swung his axe around at him. Sombra just barely any time to react and managed to move his head back just in time to avoid the strike. Almost the entire strike.
Jumping away, Sombra let out soft pants as he looked over at the recovering Minotaur. Suddenly he felt something run down his cheek. Reaching out to his face with his hoof, he wiped a drop of blood from a small scratch.
"It seems the victory is yours." Sombra said in disappointment.
"Why did you hesitate?" Iron asked as he placed his axe on his shoulder while he walked towards the distraught stallion. "The match was yours had you pulled through."
"Had I gone through with my attack, there would be a good chance you'd be dead right now."
"Had you not moved your head back, you would have been dead as well. Furthermore, for a unicorn, you don't use your magic very much. I did not pull my punches, why did you?"
"The filly I talked about, she told me to try to keep from killing other ponies."
"I doubt Minotaurs count as ponies."
Iron Wall was right. Sombra had full reign to kill him had he wanted to. The curse had done nothing to handicap his power while fighting him.
"It still would have made her sad if she found out." Sombra said in a shrug.
Iron Wall smiled. Never before had he met somepony so strange as Sombra. It almost made him want to forget the deal they made. Still, there might be a way to remedy the situation so both parties leave happy. He at least knew now that he was trustworthy.
"Follow me." Iron said as he began to walk towards where Sombra had come from.
"Where are we going?"
"There is more than one way out. Our deal was that if I won, I would not let you walk by me to that door, but if I lead you out through another one, it would still be in accordance with the deal."
Sombra didn't fight his logic. Instead he rushed over to his side and followed him back through the tunnels. As they walked, Iron Wall made sure to step on certain sinkable tiles to light the hall with torches that sprang from the walls.
"Ah, so that's what those are for." Sombra said softly, only getting a smirk from Iron as a response. Their trip soon led them to the dead end from earlier where the contraption was been placed. Walking onto it, Iron Wall took out his axe and stabbed the handle into a hidden hole on the wall. Turning it like a key, it set the machine into motion and began to bring them back up.
"Don't you worry, we'll be out of here in no time."
<=•=>
"We're lost aren't we?" Sweetie Belle asked as the made their third trip down the same hall.
"There has to be a way through. We've made it this far. Perhaps if you found the hidden tiles, we would have been out by now." Luna said in an annoyed tone.
"You could help too you know!" Sweetie shouted, equally as frustrated.
"M-My vision isn't...good in the dark." Luna said as she tried to come up with an excuse.
"You're the Princess of the Night! What do you mean your vision isn't good in the dark?! How backwards can you be?"
"Hold thine tongue, how dare thee speak in such a manner to thine Princess!"
"Again with the shouting. You know, you'll never make many friends if you keep that up."
"The night is my only comfort, I can live perfectly fine like so." Luna said as she pulled Sweetie Belle off her back and placed her on the floor to stare her down.
"Live perfectly fine? In the dark? Where you can't see? I doubt it." Sweetie Belle teased with a smirk.
"Take that back!" The Princess shouted shouted as she picked up the filly again.
"Make me!" Sweetie Belle said as she pulled on Luna's cheek, quickly making her return the favor. The two of them continued to struggle for a while longer, trading 'insults' at one another before they finally realized that had an audience.
"How the mighty have fallen." Iron Wall said as he leaned on the wall.
"I'll say." Sombra said with a chuckle.
Sweetie Belle quickly jumped away from the Alicorn's grip and ran towards her dark guardian, leaving Luna to pick herself up and save what little face she had left.
"Mister Sombra!" She shouted as she jumped to him. He caught her and pulled her in for a tight hug. "I was so worried about you!" She said as she pulled away for a moment.
"And I of you. But it seem Luna kept you in good enough shape."
"Yeah, she did her best." Sweetie continued to tease. "But if I had to pick, I would rather have you take care of me."
"I'll do my best not to leave your side again." He responded as she quickly climbed back onto his back.
"I am Iron Wall." Iron said as he introduced himself to Luna, leaving the other two to their little moment. "Sombra caught me up on the details. I do not believe I've had the pleasure of introducing myself since your return Princess Luna."
"It is a pleasure, though what are you doing here under Canterlot Castle?"
"Think of me as Canterlot security for this place. Follow me, I shall lead you out." He said as he began to walk ahead. Luna turned to Sombra who only nodded at her to follow.
They did so quickly traversed the dungeon with Iron's help. He knew the entire structure like the back of his hand. He led them safely through the traps and high up to the surface. Out of amusement, he even offered Sweetie Belle a ride on his shoulders simply so she could brag she had ridden both an Alicorn and a Minotaur, who were powerful beings. It allowed for Luna and Sombra to stay back a while so they could talk.
"Say Sombra?" Luna began.
"Yes?"
"Are you still set on finding that stone?"
"If I can, yes." Sombra said softly. He still hadn't made up his mind, but deep down, he knew his heart wouldn't quit on the idea just yet.
"Sweetie Belle told me that you believe finding it will allow you to bring some good to Equestria."
"Yes, that is the truth."
"What kind of good exactly?"
"I..." Sombra said softly. "Would you believe me if I said I couldn't recall?"
"I thought as much." Luna said with a sigh. "So allow me to ask you this. What would you do if you find the stone, and suddenly remember everything you had forgotten and you realize it was all for an evil purpose?"
"I would stop." Sombra answered immediately, shocking her at the quickness of his response.
"Truly?"
"I may have done some terrible things in my past. I was a king that kept his people alive, but I was not always kind. I needed to make the difficult choices that nopony else would. I know my goal is ultimately for vengeance. That in it of itself may be evil in some eyes, but if it my opponent is evil too, well, sometimes to do some good you have to be the bad guy."
Sombra smiled softly at her. Luna couldn't help but return the gesture.
"Sweetie Belle was right to put her faith in you."
"I wouldn't go that far." Sombra said with a chuckle. "But I wouldn't do anything to bring her into harms way."
"That is all I can ask of you. Still, if there is some way I could help, do let me know."
"Actually..." Sombra said as his face became serious once more. "There is something I could very much use your help for..."
This might be a good sign.
A fitting end and segway into the next plot line. Still, the chapter could use some polishing and fine tuning.
Myyyyysteryyyyyy!
It is quite awesome, I love how Sombra has grown over so long, and yet still holds on to certain things. Also I really soon want to see some more memories, because i Am curious as all of Helheim
Sombra can change gender?
5586672 damn, thought i had fixed all of those I have no idea why that's such a common mistake for me
Iron Wall. Iron Will. Looks like there's a Minotaur clan out there whose bond is iron. Rise up, Iron Horde.
5586672 Well if Alucard can do it, why not Sombra?
"Sometimes the only choices you can make are bad ones, but you still have to choose." You are developing Sombra very well and I love it, keep it up and don't stress that you are 'taking too long' to write chapters, you update this at least x10 faster than every other fanfiction I'm reading.
Hmm... It sorta has a Shadow of Mordor feel at this point. Was that your plan?
5586764
Because Alucard is an ancient vampire that has probably lost his mind.
_______________________________________________________________________
"Hey kids! Wanna see a dead body!?"
_______________________________________________________________________
I wouldn't trust him with guarding a rock.
5586980 ... You cheeky dick waffle!
Great chapter.
Very good chapter...but there is just ONE small thing that seems a BIT off.
Yeah...I really can't see Luna threatening to rip out a filly's tongue because she made her angry.
Now something like this would make more sense IMHO: "Hold thine tongue 'lest We lay our hoof upon thine flank!"
Any who....great to see another and can't wait to see more. BTW do you have plans for Sweetie's parents to meet Sombra?
5586765
wile yes necromancy at one point meant death divination. The common meaning and idea behind it has expanded to cover almost all of the fields of death magic and necromantic energy for some inexplicable reason possibly a book writer or more likely Holly Wood
Other than a few errors, this chapter was pretty good. I suspect that the "Stone of chaos" is referring to a petrified Discord, but we'll see in time.
Luna seems particularly irritable though, and Sweetie Bell is beginning to strike me as a budding teenager what with all that sass.
Huh, so it really was a labyrinth, complete with minotaur and, uh, elevators.
Makes me wonder if Celestia knows about the minotaur family that has been living in her basement's basement.
"I do my best not to leave your side again." He responded as she quickly climbed back onto his back.
I am almost sure that is supposed to read
"I'll do my best not to leave your side again." He responded as she quickly climbed back onto his back.
or
"I shall do my best not to leave your side again." He responded as she quickly climbed back onto his back.
this chapter is good and pretty... not like the world
I like the way you're developing Sombra, although I think you may be making Luna a bit too short-tempered.
Also, it's always nice to see an "honor-bound warrior" type of character. I really like those for some reason.
Was the pre-Duel dialog inspired by the Princess Bride?
That character development
Also, that minotaur. Makes you wonder if Iron Will knows him at all
5587503 Not gonna lie, it took me way too long to realize there was actually a difference between the three examples you typed. I really need to work on my proof reading.
5587333 Sweetie Belle is actually only like this towards Luna, no pony else. The reason being is that Luna showed the most aggression against Sombra, quickly marking her the target for Sweetie Belle's new found pride in Sombra and courageous nature.
5587822 Though most would not agree that Luna is short tempered, there is little proof that she isn't quick to anger in the show. I just stretched the canon a little so Luna could have a more active dynamic with Sombra and Sweetie Belle, because let's face it, if Luna had been as sweet and understanding as let's say, Celestia, there would be little conflict at all to resolve between them.
Take it all with a grain of salt, but I personally though having Luna be quick to jump the gun be the perfect way for her to hate Sombra but gradually begin to like and trust him.
5586845 I would never introduce a character only to forget about him or her in the next chapter. Rest assured that Iron Wall will make a few more appearances before having a significant role near the climax of the story.
5587243 Yes, that was my bad. I suppose that the reason I wrote it like that is that at every point before then Luna had only used the Royal Canterlot Voice to threatened Sombra, not Sweetie Belle. It is much less noticible when two adults are going back and forth like so than if a child is suddenly involved in the same tone. I'll make sure to fix it soon.
5587988 He does. All too well Just going to say that there is a reason why Iron Wall has a name so similar to Iron Will.
5586905 Actually no. Shadow of Mordor came out after I had already started the fic. Though I can see why you might think so. I too felt like the game was similar to my fic as I played the game. Ha! Can you imagine Sweetie Belle traversing Mordor with a sword and dagger though? Having Sombra switch in to shoot powerful dark been instead of an elf bow? That would be awesome.
5587913 I can't say it is... I have heard of Princess Bride, but I have not actually seen it myself. Heard it is a great movie though.
Daddy's little filly.
fc08.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2013/137/c/1/sweetie_belle___magic_time_by_caliazian-d64yoim.png
"M-My vision isn't...good in the dark." Luna said as she tried to come up with an excuse.
"You're the Princess of the Night! What do you mean your vision isn't good in the dark?! How backwards can you be?"
That was funny!
~Silver Spade
I think you mean 'size'...
5588131
Good movie, good book. A definite must read. Anyways, it's just that Sombra and Iron's pre duel dialog reminded me strongly of Wesley and Inigo's duel on the Cliffs of Madness.
Sweetie Belle? Using dark magic?
Stone with chaos in it. He was looking for Discords statue wasn't he?
but a simply child nonetheless
But it seem Luna kept you in good enough shape
He responded as she quickly
I know my goal is ultimately for vengeance
1. But simply a child nonetheless.
2. Seems.
3 & 4. Just a little extra spacing.
I wonder now... Is Luna afraid of things like The Boogey Pony? And if you think hard enough, it can be stretched to believe that Luna is not really acclimated to the dark. why? Because she looks after ponies dreaming in the night. And that leaves her with little to no time in actual darkness. Save for the darkness in the dreams of course.
5588511 well shit
5588511
Yep, we're all doomed
AW, SOMBRA~ You big ol' sweetheart!
I recently read through all the chapters because I finally got curious enough about the story after seeing it in the featured stories many times, and am so glad I did. There are a few grammatical errors that make it seem a tiny bit strange in place, but it's not hard to figure out what's being said. They seem like nitpick errors in my opinion, and it hardly detracts from the story itself, if at all. I love how Sombra and Sweetie interact and how the surrounding characters react as well to him. I like the personality you gave him and how the way you write about his past even if he doesn't remember his time before being king. It really gives him a lot more depth than the show ever could with the limited appearances he was given, and shows how there are two sides to every story, that not everything is always as it seems, and how history is, in this case, written by the victors.
There is one thing I am wondering about however. In an earlier chapter (I forget which exactly) during one of Sweetie's and Sombra's chess games, it was shown how Rarity got a bit upset with Sweetie for not eating her food and Sweetie saying she wasn't hungry, but Sombra's plate was licked clean of crumbs. I've been wondering about that since it hasn't been mentioned again since. Will it be touched upon more in-depth in the future? O was it just a passing thing mentioned that would only occur once?
5594977 First off, I'm glad you enjoyed my story despite the perhaps, strange beginning that many (and looking back, even I) see as a bad case of 'strange dialogue.' I placed a lot of thought into the story, the background of the characters and Sombra, and the over arcing plot of the story and am happy that others like it so much.
Secondly, yes, it will explained more thoroughly in future chapters, even playing a key part in the final part of the second arc of the fic, leading into the last arc which will be by far the most serious arc of the storyline. I simply wanted to bring it up early on so that when it starts to play a bigger role in the story, people don't get thrown off by it. After all, it is a rather important detail, and had I left it out until the end of the second arc, it might have come out of left field to many.
5597630
Well, I can't wait to see what it brings. You are a very talented writer, so I'm anticipating more great chapters.
SombraxLuna shipping. Would be pretty funny to see based on these last few chapters. But thatsbjust an idle thought.
Moving on, good chapters, can't wait to see more. I'm really looking forward to finding out what sombras back story really is.
5586764
Now you've got me curious. I wonder if Alucard actually did change genders. He was a woman once, but he doesn't seem they type to change his attitude or even compare himself properly to humans. So the question then becomes: did Alucard change gender and sex, or if he still identify with the masculine side of humanity?
5602119 An interesting question. Unfortunately, since I am an idiot, I have no exact answer.but what I do know is that now I want a picture of Sombra dressed as Alucard and Sweetie Belle as seras
Another great chapter coming to an end I can't wait for another update
5588511
What? Dark magic has its uses. Magic, of any type, is a tool to be used, and any tool can be used for both good and bad. Besides, it's black magic that is corruptive, not dark magic.
He's the hero Equestria deserves, but not the one it needs!
5619298 ...Racist...
Just because black magic originally came from africa, doesn't mean it can't do what white magic can!
Or yellow magic...
Huh. I guess "Dark Queen Sweetie Belle" is a go. Even if it just doesn't quite have the best ring to it.
5901626
And he's the racist one?
6443473
R/wooooosh