Polygamy is Magic

by Ravenmane

First published

The Season Three you know isn't the truth! Don't avert your eyes from the truth!

Notice: This is third in my Ponies on series. Please begin where you're supposed to or things might be a bit confusing. I'm not sure if it needs to be said but I'm gonna say it just to be sure. If you haven't been a brony hiding under a rock then lots of Season 3 inbound!

Things get a little weird as soon as we return to Alex, Twilight, and Rainbow. The wedding is over and done with, and we join the trio on their honeymoon trip to the tropics (thanks to Shining Armor and Cadance). With twenty percent more implying, will the teen rating hold or will I have to add something strange and unusual?

This story is rated PL (Princess Luna) for themes suited for young adults and some really messed up shit.

1 - Rude Awakening

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Throne Room, Canterlot Castle

Celestia glared at the stack of forms she had to examine. “This is just before my meeting with my trainer at nine?”

“It was the only time we could pencil it in your highness,” replied her secretary nervously. “After your meeting with your trainer you have your meeting with a representative from Stalliongrad, followed by a light lunch. After lunch, you have that appearance to make at the foals ward at Canterlot Central Hospital. We also have to make your arrangements to visit Saddle Arabia still. I mean, you’ve been putting that off for months.”

With a sigh, Celestia began her work. Raise in the garden staff’s pay? Approved. Appoint a royal food taster for my sister? Old fashioned, and requested by my sister but approved. Budget balanced by my sister, what would I do without your math skills. Law repealed by my sister, thanks for taking the heat for this Luna. The notes and forms seemed to drag on forever. I certainly hope I can have some ice cream with Luna tonight, the solar diarch thought. Her pleasant grin from the thought was quickly removed as a soldier barged into the throne room.

“News from Northern Equestria,” he exclaimed.

“Yes,” Princess Celestia asked.

“I am simply to tell you that it has returned.”

Celestia’s eyes widened, she knew the ramifications of what this would bring. “Find Princess Cadance and Shining Armor at once!”

“Yes your highness,” called one of her guards before galloping off with the newcomer.

“I’ll just reschedule your day then,” said Celestia’s secretary meekly before retreating with Celestia’s forms.

My dearest Twilight,” Celestia began as she quickly began to compose her letter on freshly summoned parchment.

One of her remaining guards cleared his throat. “Um, your highness isn’t Twilight Sparkle on her honeymoon?”

Princess Celestia scowled and summoned two more pieces of parchment. Calling one before the others she cast a sideways glance towards the guard in question. “I doubt anypony would dare attack me in the next few hours. Go and wake my sister.”

The guardspony met her gaze and saluted before galloping out.

Dear Spike…

*****

Elsewhere in Equestria…

Knock, knock, knock

A purple magical aura, woke me with a flash of sunlight by opening the shades. “I’ll get the door as long as you leave the blinds shut for Dash,” I grumbled to Twilight.

“Um guys,” called the rainbow maned pegasus from the window, “I left my key in the room when I went for a zip around in the beach. Can one of you please be awake enough to let me back in?”

Knock, knock, knock

“I’m getting the door,” I mumbled. “She’s all yours,” I begrudgingly added as I gave Twilight a soft peck on the cheek.

“Next time, remind me not to go for an oyster platter before we turn in,” called Twilight in her own sleepy haze.

“Yeah,” added a muffled Rainbow Dash, “me neither. Now, lemmie in Twi!”

Last night was… interesting. It consisted of oysters, more than enough to drink, and very little sleep. As I heard the bedroom window slide open I creaked open the cabin door. “Can I help you?” Strangely enough, what came into focus was our dear mailmare from Ponyville. “What are you doing out here Ditzy? We’re hundreds of miles from Ponyville.”

“Express mail from Ponyville,” she told me warmly. “I was given instructions to make sure Twilight got this one,” she pulled one letter from her bag. “You and Rainbow Dash get this other one. Those were the orders I got from Canterlot when Spike passed them all along.”

After taking them, I looked them over carefully. Sure enough, they were marked accordingly.

Twilight Sparkle
Everfree Lane
Ponyville

Rainbow Dash and Alexander
Everfree Lane
Ponyville

The only addition I saw to either of them was the listing for Meliá Hayvana Resort, Cabana 6 which was indeed accurate.

“Spike gave me the address of where you were staying; the concierge gave me the cabin number. He was such a nice stallion.”

“Do we owe you anything Ditzy? I mean that’s quite the trip.”

“Nope, just super high priority. I was under orders and couldn’t let them leave my sight. Take care Alex!” She turned around and flew off as wobbly as any other day.

“Twilight,” I called, “Dashie, we have mail. If you can believe it, Ditzy came all the way from Ponyville to deliver it.”

I was barely midway through a yawn when Rainbow slid up beside me. “That was Ditzy? Really, that featherbrain came a couple hundred miles to deliver our mail? She hardly knows her north from her south, yet she can figure out where Hayvanna is?”

“Let’s see,” said Twilight as she snatched her letter from me. “I smell a hint of dragon flame so it must be from the princess.” Rainbow and I exchanged glances and gave our own letter a sniff as Twilight read her letter. “Oh no. How can she expect me to do that?”

“What’s going on Twi,” asked Rainbow.

“Princess Celestia’s expecting me to leave our honeymoon to go take a test!”

I gasped it meant one thing: our time in a tropical paradise was cut short for something that felt more like the fate of Equestria hung in the balance. “Does she have any clue how far we are from anything you learned without us?” Problems arise halfway through our honeymoon? I knew it was too good to be true. I’m just happy I’m better adjusted to this stuff now.

“Not to mention how long it’s gonna take to get to Canterlot,” added Rainbow. “I mean it’s a three hour boat ride back to Mareami. Why couldn’t you have wings Twi cause I mean it wouldn’t be too long of a flight there!”

“Right,” said Twilight nervously, “but that means we can stop by Ponyville on our way to Canterlot by train. I can get my study materials and make sure I’m all set for anything Princess Celestia can throw at me. Rainbow go pack your socks, we need to check out.”

“But, ugh, why don’t you get your bit and crop first! I mean, you’ve denied it all the time, but we all know Princess Cadance got you those things as a joke gift. Why did you actually take it seriously?”

I still think we should’ve kept the kinky stuff back home, I thought as the argument escalated.

“Alex, how about you get my bridle,” called Twilight as I tried to retreat to the shower.

“Dammit Twi, I’m gonna get washed up, get all set to go, and see if we can get some of our bits back for checking out early. I mean somepony has to and I’m so much of a wreck after last night. I mean I thought I told you both I can only handle so much!”

“Fine, Rainbow and I will pack up; you try to get everything squared away. See if you can use my letter to get a bit of leverage.”

I nodded and hit the shower before she could change her mind.

*****

“Look,” said the concierge, “I get it that you have to check out early cause your wife has to make a trip to Canterlot but there’s no way I can refund you the next six days of your honeymoon.”

“There’s more to it than that,” I yelled at him. We had gone far passed when I should be calm. “All three of us need to go to Canterlot ASAP. I don’t know what you’re on if you think hotel policy can trump a royal summons.”

“I’m sorry sir, I’ll put in something to the hotel owner but I’m sure he’ll say no reimbursement.”

“Then I’ll be sure to tell Princess Celestia that next time all of Equestria is in danger they should ignore saving Hayvanna.” Yes, I was playing dirty, but if we didn’t hurry, we would be stuck waiting on tomorrow’s boat.

“Wait,” he examined the addressee of the letter a little closer, “the Twilight Sparkle? I’ll make some calls, get you all reimbursed. I’m positive he’ll say yes once he realizes he’s about to ruin a national hero’s honeymoon when she has something important she has to do.”

“Two heroes,” I corrected. “Rainbow Dash an-”

“Rainbow Dash,” he asked as his wings flared. “You mean the pegasus that can do the Sonic Rainboom? I mean, I heard stories but-”

“Yes, still think we’re just some customers?”

“Not at all, not at all. I’ll make sure you all get your bits back I mean I know we aren’t cheap.”

“Alex,” called Twilight from behind me. “We got the keys, you got the bits?”

“We’ll be sure to send the refund back to the address in Canterlot sir.”

I gave a calm sigh. “Thank you so very much. This emergency return’s gonna run murder on our finances as is so I like having some good news out of all of this.”

Twilight darted up beside me, our luggage in tow, and slammed the keys down on the counter. “We’ll need to gallop to catch the boat dear.”

“I was just thanking the nice stallion Twilight,” I told her warmly as I took the lead outside. “So where’s Rainbow?”

“She went on ahead to haggle our round trip tickets into immediate boarding.” As the doors swung open for us, we were met with a waiting carriage.

“All set,” called Rainbow, “and I even got us a ride willing to triple time it.”

I smiled broadly as I got in. “There’s no way I’m gonna describe how much I love you both is there?”

“No possible way,” Rainbow replied.

“You’re welcome to try though,” added Twilight as she levitated our luggage in before her.

*****

“Relax Twi,” I said as I caught her starting to pace again, “we made it to the boat and you don’t have any of your study supplies. There’s not much you can do about it.”

Rainbow leaned up on her chair. “Yeah, soak up some rays, we’ve got a long train ride on top of this little boat ride to deal with. No way we’ll reach Canterlot until sometime tomorrow. The day after only if we’re unlucky.”

“Wait,” She said as she skidded to a halt.

“There’s no way we’re gonna let you go to Canterlot on your own Twi,” I said calmly. “We’ll be with you for as long as we can. We’re a family, we all said our vows, and we’re staying together.” I sat back and realigned my sunglasses. “Just relax under the sun with us Twi. A lot of stress is bad if you’re going to take a test so just take it easy right now.”

“Just try and, you know, take it a little easy while you can,” suggested Rainbow. “Worrying about it when there’s nothing you can do won’t solve anything.”

Twilight finally stopped her pacing and levitated a chair in between us. “You’re both right, I can’t do anything about it and I understand that.”

“That’s good to hear dear,” I told her.

“Yeah,” replied Rainbow Dash, “no need to go flying off the handle. We’ll take the fastest train to Ponyville and everything will be good.”

Twilight fidgeted. “What if I don’t pass?”

“You’re still family,” I reminded her. “Not like you’ll be anything less in our eyes.”

“Might have ’ta work extra time at the library,” Rainbow commented. “But that’s just if she gets real uppity about it. You worry too much, too often Twilight.”

“But-”

“We’d love you no less,” I reminded her as I cut her off. “Rainbow, pass her some shades and we can all just enjoy the sun.”

“I’ll do better than that,” she replied excitedly while getting out of her chair, “I’ll go make an appointment for a massage for three!”

*****

Ponyville

Spike frantically rushed around the library. Twilight received a letter from Princess Celestia, which was perfectly normal, but the cause for concern came from the additional letters.

“Take it easy,” he told himself. “Twilight’s panic attacks are just rubbing off on you.” For some reason, this sounded far less comforting when he said it aloud.

His letter remained exactly where he left it when he arrived in the library.

Dear Spike,

Please send the following two letters to Twilight, Alexander, and Rainbow Dash as soon as possible. I would send them direct, but I am well aware of how well you know how nopony informed anyone where they were heading. It is imperative that they get these letters as soon as possible and from somepony that won’t invade their privacy.

Hurry along now,
Princess Celestia

2 - Not That Kind of Test

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After a very tense train ride, Twilight galloped off towards our house. Being the rational pony that I was, I made sure we could make the next train as Rainbow went after her.

“Where are the index cards,” I could hear Twilight yell as I neared home.

This is so not good, I thought as soon as I touched down on the porch and entered. “Need any help Twi?”

“Parchment,” yelled Twilight’s voice from upstairs. “Quills and ink too!”

I reluctantly fetched her supplies and slipped them into a sack before going upstairs only to be met with Spike covering my mouth.

“Don’t ask,” he whispered. “Trust me.”

Despite Spike’s warnings, I went to aid Twilight. Fortunately, I wasn’t alone in my regret as Rainbow helped lug everything with me back towards the train station. As we carried everything, Twilight had her nose in a very large tome while Spike wrote flashcards on her back.

“Twi, you have to calm down a bit,” I told her. My saddlebags were full; the extra bags she insisted I carried were slowing me down. “I mean, it’s just a test.”

“Yeah, there’s no way she’s gonna test you on everything you’ve ever learned,” added Rainbow. Just like me, Rainbow was suffering under more than we ever thought we’d be carrying for Twilight’s studies.

“This isn’t just some test,” she practically yelled from behind her book. “Princess Celestia’s going to test me to see if I can go onto the next level of my studies, I just know it. You both aren’t helping to calm me down anymore!”

I looked to Rainbow. Both of us were smart enough not to risk handling a furious unicorn whose talent was magic itself.

“This is going to be the most important test of my life.” As she looked over the top of her book, she saw us both glaring at her. “What?”

Rainbow sighed and continued towards the train station, but I didn’t move. “What about a pregnancy test,” I said before following Rainbow’s lead. All I heard behind me was the scratching of Spike’s quill and the slow clopping of Twilight’s hooves. I didn’t mean to sound cold, but if I said one thing a million times, it was that we were all in this together.

*****

All any of us talked about on the train was what Twilight insisted we quiz her on between politely excusing ourselves to bang our heads against the wall of a different compartment. As I returned from the bathroom though, I saw Rainbow rubbing her head.

“Getting sore Dashie?”

“Yeah,” she said bitterly. “How did Spike put up with this before they came to your place?”

“I wish I knew cause imagine what she’ll be like as a mom if she keeps acting like this.”

Rainbow shuddered. “How long till we get to Canterlot anyways?”

“It’s still a couple hours Dashie. Got any other questions or can I go back there and take over for Spike?”

“If Twi mellowed out a little, you think she’d be better at it?”

“Yeah why, you been seriously thinkin’ about it?”

“Yep,” she said happily.

“It’s my understanding that it can be a humbling thing.” While I may not have pressed for it, Ditzy loved to talk when she had time and she could tell what I was thinking about often. She really catches far more than anyone gives her credit.

“So whaddya think about me?”

“Ideal soccer mom,” I said without a thought to the contrary as I returned to the compartment holding the nervous wreck of a unicorn.

*****

Despite how many times I’ve passed through Canterlot, at Twilight’s behest, I never felt so much tension in the air. Despite this sensation of unease, nopony in the city seemed to show any distress.

“Hey,” called Twilight as we passed through a busy section of the city, “what’s wrong?”

I snapped out of focusing on that sensation and saw her nervousness replaced with concern. “It’s just a feeling in the air Twi,” I said as I looked around. “Something just feels off about all of this. I mean, there’s no way she’d rip us from our honeymoon just to give you a test without a serious reason.”

“I think you sound like you don’t have enough faith in Princess Celestia.”

Even if she didn’t mean it as an insult, it drew every bystander’s eyes to me. “I have faith in her to rule and guide the sun, but not to dictate your life Twi. Don’t we factor in at all?”

“Yes, I mean, I know that but she’s my mentor and, more importantly, the ruler of Equestria. It isn’t like you say no to a royal summons.”

“I’m just saying a royal summons doesn’t rip ponies from halfway across Equestria at the crack of dawn.”

“Especially when they’re on their honeymoon,” Rainbow grumbled quietly enough so only we heard her.

Twilight rolled her eyes and continued ahead, towards whatever Princess Celestia was going to assess her on.

*****

After Twilight bade us farewell, Spike, Rainbow and I waited patiently outside.

“Odds are good she over prepared,” I told them.

“But what if she wasn’t prepared enough,” worried Spike.

“Since when has Twilight ever,” Rainbow silenced herself as she caught my skeptical look.

“Must I really list a few Dashie?”

“Besides Smartypants, what else you got?”

“How about Twilight’s warning from her future self?”

“Alright I walked int-”

“What about the parasprites? How about trying to keep too many secrets? Do I really have to make a list Dashie? I mean we still have some parchment and quills.”

“No,” she replied quickly, “you’ve proved your point. Twi can mess up like everypony else.”

I nodded. “I wouldn’t want her any other way. I just want you to be a bit more awesome than prone to mistakes alright?”

Rainbow opened her mouth to answer, but was silenced when the large doors of the building opened.

“How’d it go,” Rainbow asked as she finally got her voice to work properly.

Twilight mumbled something incoherently.

“Come again Twi,” I said.

“It wasn’t that kind of test,” she said dully.

“So what’s the plan,” Spike said as he began to pick up some of the various supplies Twilight insisted on bringing.

“Princess Celestia said she’d get some ponies to move all these things back to Ponyville. Where we’re going we won’t need it.”

“So where are we going then,” I asked her.

“The Crystal Empire,” she said definitively.

“Wait, where now,” chirped Rainbow.

“I’ll explain on the way to the train station, oh I hope everypony’s there already.”

“Wait,” I said as I flanked her, “who’s everypony in this Twi?”

“Our friends of course,” she replied pleasantly as Spike hurried up to jog on her other side.

*****

Twilight filled us all in about what her test actually would entail, teasing us some by withholding bits of information. “So to make it simple, we’re going to protect the Crystal Empire,” she said as we rounded the corner leading to the train station.

“Ooh, there they are,” shouted Pinkie as soon as she, and her party cannon, came into view. Where that girl hides it… well… I think I’ll leave you to speculate that.

“Not time for that yet,” I called out. “Train first, party-eh party sometime later Pinkie.”

“So, we’re going north girls,” said Twilight as she galloped up to hug our recently arrived friends. “Well, actually as far north as the train will take us and then some.”

“But why in Equestria are we going that far north,” Rarity whined.

“We’ll explain on the way there,” I said with a smile before getting onto the train. Slowly, everyone else joined me on the rather desolate train.

*****

“Princess Celestia told me that she already sent my brother and Princess Cadance,” explained Twilight as we all got comfortable. “We’re going to the Crystal Empire to help them defeat the evil king that cursed it.”

“Yeah,” said Rainbow enthusiastically. “This time Al can see us in action!”

“I intend to do more than that,” I said eagerly.

Twilight hopped onto the top of her bench and looked out to us all. “But-”

I glared to Twilight. “Why would she want everyone to go if she didn’t think we could help Twi?” Twilight returned my glare but eventually sighed and nodded. There was something in the resignation she showed that perked my interest more than anything else did I had hit a nerve with her favorite weapon: reason.

“Anyways, we know next to nothing about what we’re getting into right Twi,” asked Rainbow.

Twilight nodded. “I wouldn’t be surprised if the ponies of the Empire still think it’s a thousand years ago.”

“Just what did Princess Celestia tell you about the Crystal Empire,” asked Rarity.

“She didn’t say much, just that a greedy unicorn came to power and enslaved the ponies who lived there. He was a tyrant who cursed the Empire before being vanquished by Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. They defeated him, turning him to shadow, and banished him to the frozen wastes beyond the Empire’s borders.”

“What about the power of the Empire Twi,” asked Rainbow.

“Yeah,” I said with a nod, “you started to tell us but trailed off when we got near the station.”

“If the Empire is filled with hope and love then that is reflected across all of Equestria. However, if King Sombra takes hold again then…well, I don’t think I have to tell you what’s going to happen if he does.”

“Well, we certainly can’t let that happen.” Sure, I was stating the obvious, but it has to be done sometimes.

*****

A tremendous snowstorm was all that greeted us at the end of the line. Visibility was probably about twelve feet, but the snow was coming down hard and the wind wasn’t exactly helping any. As our former cover from the weather left us, Rainbow spotted a small sign marked Crystal Empire pointing towards the storm.

“That’s Shining’s writing,” Twilight yelled. Even with the volume of her voice, not to mention being about a foot away from her, I barely heard anything more than a whisper.

“What,” echoed Applejack from behind me.

“She said the sign pointing the way was done by her brother,” I clarified. “We should probably get going before it gets too dark!”

As we journeyed through the snowy tundra, Rainbow needed to be dragged from her usual inclination to fly more times than normal. No sooner had Applejack and I wrestled her to the ground for the thirtieth time, then a grey scarf and blue mane started to come into view.

“Twilight,” called the scarfed pony, “sorry to say it but duty calls right?”

“Shining,” Twilight and I responded questioningly. Slowly the unicorn guard came into view clearer but waved us over instead of nearing us any more.

“We need to get going,” he said as we all fell in line, “it isn’t safe out here.”

*****

If you’ve ever been somewhere close to either of the poles, you’ll know exactly how I felt as we trudged through the snow in silence. If the weather wasn’t the problem then it was definitely the time of year that was messing with my sense of time. We arrived early in the afternoon, but it had to be close to sunset by now. Despite that, there was no real change to the weather or light. As I said, you know this the closer you get to the poles.

“We think the unicorn king’s trying to get in,” said Shining as he looked over his shoulder at everyone. If nothing else, we were certainly sticking to it.

“If the empire is already protected then why send me to defend it,” Twilight asked him. The question barely had time to leave her lips when a sound like a horn echoed through the frozen wastes.

“We need to get to the empire,” yelled Shining, “now!” His eyes were wide and focused on something behind us. This uneasy feeling caused me to look back at the dark mist billowing in behind us… against the wind!

“Run,” I yelled as Shining took the lead. This sense of unease, I thought as I tailed him with Rainbow Dash passing on my left, I felt this in Canterlot. Now wasn’t the time to be voicing my thoughts, now was the time to make my legs ache and whine under speed and distance. Now was the time for us to run for our lives.

As we continued to be chased by the darkness, Shining spun around to face it. “Keep going,” he yelled. As much as any of us wanted to argue to the contrary, we continued until we reached a large blue and white dome protruding out of the ground.

I stuck a cautionary hoof towards it and passed through cleanly. The fact that I could get through at all told everyone that it was safe. What met our eyes were clear skies and lush grass, a large palace that seemed to carve through the sky off in the distance.

“Everypony okay,” asked Twilight between labored breaths.

Every muscle in my body burned as the adrenaline that was once fueling me faded. Despite that, I nodded between pants, much the same as everyone else.

“So… so outta breath,” answered Rainbow. “Don’t think I could walk an inch further,” she added before collapsing on the ground.

Twilight’s gaze however was transfixed on where we entered, hoping to see her brother again soon.

3 - The Crystal Ponies

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As Twilight continued to stare at the barrier we recently passed through, the rest of us gathered around her. I draped a wing over Twilight’s back and continued to wait alongside her.

Twilight bit her lip as she looked at me. “He’s coming right?”

I was on the edge of saying he was immediately just to try and keep her calm but I didn’t want to lull myself into a false sense of security that my brother-in-law was going to be fine. “He’ll come back to us,” I told her as I tugged her tighter.

As Rainbow joined us, Twilight’s head dropped onto my shoulder. “He’s my brother and I don’t know what Cadance would do to me if her husband died getting us here.”

Come on Shining, I thought, you’re tougher than this.

After a few more minutes of silent tension, Shining came flying through the barrier. He was covered in wounds and had small crystalline shards jutting from his horn. Twilight gasped and teleported to his side, leaving my wing to snap shut in my face.

Twilight helped her brother get back on his hooves. “Shining, are you okay?”

“Al, you alright,” Rainbow asked at the same time.

I simply replied by rubbing my snout, eager to hear my brother-in-law’s answer more than giving my own.

“It’s okay Twiley,” Shining said, “I’ve been through worse. Even as he is, King Sombra still has a lot of power. Right now I should give you more of a report as we get back to the palace.”

I nodded in agreement and turned my head so I could actually see the Crystal Empire in more than just a flash. The empire itself seemed to be made of crystals, truly living up to its namesake. The buildings were all like crystalline spires, even the gateway near us was made of crystals. This was a sight to behold as we trotted through a thoroughfare towards the palace at the empire’s center.

*****

Shining Armor led us up staircases within the palace as he summed everything up. “With King Sombra prowling around outside our defenses, I’m hard pressed to find out anything about how to stop him.”

“What about Princess Cadance,” I asked him.

“Well,” he started while pushing opening a large door.

On a throne of polished crystals sat Princess Cadance. The warm smile she gave us felt betrayed as I focused more on the bags under her eyes.

Twilight began to pick up speed as she saw Cadance look to all of us but I unfurled a wing to block her way. “As happy as we are to see you, I don’t think you want to divert your focus too much Cadance,” I said calmly.

Cadance nodded as she slowly trotted towards us. “I’m sorry Twilight,” she said wearily, “we should try to get together around doing important things in the future.”

Twilight rounded my wing and hugged her former foalsitter. “What can I do to help?”

Shining Armor cleared his throat. “Cadance hasn’t been sleeping, she barely eats, and with me trying to keep King Sombra at bay we haven’t been able to find a better countermeasure.” He focused on his horn, barely managing to issue a few sparks from it. “Great, and now I can’t even help her with my own magic.”

“I’m fine,” Cadance said sternly.

“You aren’t fine,” I said as I approached her. “How long have you been here? I mean no disrespect Cadance but without food and rest there’s no way you’re anywhere close to fine.

Cadance sighed. “It’s been about a week now. How long does it take for three ponies to get from Hayvana to the Crystal Empire anyways?”

“Princess Celestia wasn’t exactly specific about what we were doing,” answered Twilight.

“Why not,” Cadance snapped. “She told us this was more important than anything!”

“Cadance don’t lash out at them,” said Shining nervously. “Calm down, I’ve been worried that this is getting to be too much for you.”

“We’ll get working on a more permanent thing alright,” I said reassuringly. “Everyone’s here to help,” I added as I looked back to the rest of the crew from Ponyville.

Twilight nodded. “So, where can we begin?”

“Well with Cadance here and me out there,” Shining gave a bitter look towards the horizon, “we haven’t been able to get much information from the crystal ponies.”

“Crystal ponies,” squealed Rarity, “they’re real?”

“Obviously,” answered Rainbow sarcastically. “What did you think lives in the Crystal Empire Rarity? Chimeras?”

“We think somepony out there has to know of a way to stop King Sombra,” clarified Cadance as she managed to get back to her throne with her husband’s assistance.

Twilight gasped. “A research-”

“Twilight,” I interrupted quickly, “honey, you know I love you to death but if the next word you say is ‘paper’ then I’m sure everypony here would be willing to look the other way so I could give you a big welt on the back of your noggin.”

“This must be part of my test,” Twilight mumbled. At least she was courteous enough to listen and avoid the p-word. “So,” she started up again, “we gather information from the crystal ponies then relay our findings.”

I rolled my eyes as Twilight started to usher everyone off to do specific things, but my eyes zeroed in on whom I wanted to talk with. “Shining, can I have a word?”

Shining gave a brief glimpse towards Cadance before looking past me at the door left ajar. “Sure Alex, what’s on your mind?”

I bade he come with me as I left the room. “Is something else going on Shining,” I asked him once we were alone.

“Well, you know what time of the year it’s been right?”

“Oh,” I gasped, “oh. It’s that right? Is she?”

Shining shook his head. “I think she might have some regrets. I mean, I think she thinks I’m firing blanks or something already. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe-”

The rest of his fretting was silenced by my hoof across his face. “You call yourself a soldier?”

“What are you getting at Alex?”

“You’re still a bit too relaxed while important things are going on.”

“What’s it to you how I act?”

“You’re in a powerful position; you’re married to a princess and a commanding officer in the Canterlot Royal Guard for pony’s sake. You’re going to have to pony up and do your job at one hundred and ten percent.” I sighed. “That said, I hope Cadance recovers from her current vibe so she doesn’t bite your head off if everything goes sideways. I’d probably understand your fears about coming up empty if the three of us were focusing on foals right now. After taking care of this, we’re going to focus on stabilizing our lives and maybe we’ll talk about kids in theory for now, but that’s all we’ll do.”

“You’ve got a few good points in there, good to know I’ve got another guy up here, even if he keeps his cool about this stuff.”

I snickered. “Who’s keeping cool? I just have a wife that would kill me if I lost it and another that loses it all the time. I’ll never be able to keep my cool,” I added before diving out of a window and soaring along a thoroughfare just above the rooftops.

*****

I had the familiar feeling that I initially had in Ponyville when trying to get the crystal ponies to talk to me. They steered clear or slammed their doors shut. Despite this, I had one prevailing thought: for being called crystal ponies, they weren’t very crystal looking. Perhaps if they shined they would look the part, but they lacked a vibrancy that would give the semi-reflective tone of their coats what I was looking for.

“What are you staring at,” spoke a dull voice behind me.

I spun around and saw a very bleak looking mare looking at me behind a very passive expression. “Why don’t any of you look more uh crystal-y,” I answered.

She shrugged. “Are you with the other ponies?”

“Yes, we’re looking for a way to keep the empire safe. Can you help at all?”

“Well, you could probably find something in the library. That is, if he didn’t destroy it.”

“Where is this library?”

She reached over and tilted my head so I could see the building across the street. Even among the other impressive buildings of the empire, the library stood out as an important building. With griffon statues flanking the massive doors, it was a wonder I didn’t really notice it. I blame Ponyville’s thatched roofs and the tropical sun from my honeymoon.

“Oh,” I said dully. “Thanks, if you see any of my friends then tell them where I went okay?”

“I saw a couple of them going in there already,” she told me with a weak smile. I hoped that smile was a sign of her showing a positive attitude.

I rushed towards the library and creaked open the doors. “Twilight,” I called out.

“We’re looking for a history book,” echoed her voice from somewhere in the library.

I took to wing and soared around the library, examining bookshelves left and right. After my twentieth bookshelf, I groaned and knocked an entire shelf onto the floor. “Oopsie,” I said meekly before looking through the titles. Strange topics like keeping your coat glossy and using reflective surfaces to your advantage adorned some books while there were manuals about jousting and military training littered in as well. “Maybe they did this to hide some information from King Sombra,” I mumbled.

As a desperate groan echoed from a floor beneath me I went to a lower shelf and saw a thick volume. The closest book to this one, Formal Manestyles Through the Ages, was perhaps half as thick as this one. My frustration gave way to curiosity as I pulled the tome from its resting place.

“History of,” I trailed off as a wide grin grew on my face. “I found something!” Without any further explanation, I flew down to Twilight with the book. “How about this one,” I showed her a book titled History of the Crystal Empire.

“I hope so,” she said worryingly. “Let’s see…”

*****

Twilight insisted on speaking with Cadance and Shining Armor in private, in case we couldn’t do what she found. That didn’t stop us from waiting outside the throne room with our ears to the door though.

“I don’t know Twiley,” said Shining.

I heard Twilight give him a swift smack. “It says here that ‘the Crystal Faire was used to renew the unity and love in the empire so they could protect it from harm.’”

“But-”

“We can put it all together, you two just focus on keeping everypony safe until we can help the crystal ponies take over.”

“Where-”

“Everything’s in the book.”

“Then get started right away,” rang the weary voice of Princess Cadance. It was practically my cue to back away from the door; everyone was quick to follow my lead.

“We’d better get ready for her to hoof out assignments,” I told them.

*****

“Princess Cadance can’t last much longer,” Twilight said as she set the history book down before us. “We’ll have to try to get this Faire down as best as we can.” Everyone nodded and looked to the book as Twilight flipped through the pages with her magic.

My eyes caught one picture in particular. “I’ll get to work on setting some jousting up,” I said with a brief smile towards Rainbow.

“Okay,” said Twilight, “Rainbow can join you later on to give you an opponent.”

“Just don’t expect me to go easy on ya,” Dashie added.

“I’ll handle the flags and such,” commented Rarity. “I’ll need references of course.”

“No problem,” said Twilight, “there are plenty of references here.”

“Don’t you fret about the food,” added Applejack. “Ah’ll just need Pinkie to lend me a hoof gatherin’ ingredients.”

“We can get some recipes if you need them,” replied Twilight.

“I’ll get them on our way,” chirped Pinkie.

“Um, what do you want me to do,” asked Fluttershy.

Twilight looked through the book a while longer. “How about you handle a petting zoo Fluttershy? It says here that they had one with crystal ewes.”

“Crystal ewes,” she repeated.

“Ah’m sure you can find some of them,” said Applejack.

“Once we get things started we’ll get their interest,” added Twilight.

“Ooh! It says here that there’s this flugelhorn that they liked to play,” said Pinkie, her nose deep in the book. “Can I play it?”

“Well, you’ll have to learn to play the anthem if you want to do that. Rainbow, how about you help me with some of the festival stands and decorations. Everypony can help once they get things together.”

“No sweat Twi,” Rainbow said confidently. “We’ll just use the book to save to crystal ponies right?”


“I’ll try to keep instructions down to a minimum,” said Twilight. “That just means I want you all to do your part and then some. We don’t have enough ponies to keep things going all over the place. Work as a team and we should be good to go.”

Everyone gave a collective nod before darting off to work on our respective tasks.

4 - The Faire

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I searched the lower levels of the palace in an attempt to find some suitable armor, best to look the part after all. In hindsight, asking Shining before he departed to resume his patrol might’ve been a good idea. By the time I was ready to give up, I found a few shining suits of steel armor. They looked as though they were completely unused, but I for the most part slipped one on and carried a second on top of it.

Amidst lugging the armor towards a series of bleachers that seemed to have sprung out of nowhere along the thoroughfare, I saw Rainbow flying about and fastening streamers and banners everywhere.

“Gonna let your mane down for this,” she called to me.

“I’ll have to,” I called back, “this thing’s pretty uncomfortable right now. Hey, you see the way they look at me?”

“You might remind them of Smoky out there.”

I rolled my eyes. “I doubt he would’ve ever jousted against a sexy mare.”

“I don’t want you goin’ easy Al.”

I grinned. “Don’t make excuses before you lose Dashie.”

“I found some training lances,” she called at me as I continued towards the empty stands. “Left em out at the bleachers!”

*****

I cantered down my setup, making sure everything was up to what it said in the book, but when Twilight passed by, book in front of her face, I looked for some encouragement.

“I’ll be making the announcement that the faire is open soon Alex,” she said.

“Do I have everything setup right?”

I caught sight of her eyes as she moved the book down. “Aside from empty bleachers, everything’s just fine. When we announce the start of the faire, I’ll send Rainbow your way. Just wait for the trumpeting of the flugelhorn and direct your attention to the palace. I want to have a few words just as we start the faire.”

“Keep it short Twi and remember no talking about ya know.”

She nodded and looked to the palace. “Do you think we can really do this?”

I came up beside her and gave her a tight hug. “As sure as beating Fluttershy at jousting with my legs tied and blindfolded. As long as we all work together it’ll be that easy.”

Twilight gave me a comforting smile. “You mean the world to me Alex,” she cooed in my ear before giving it a teasing nip.

I tried to hide my reddening face behind a teasing façade. “We can save that stuff for our train ride home in victory.”

“I’ll have to contend with Rainbow then,” she replied before heading back to her work.

“I love you,” I called to her fading backside.

*****

Nearly an hour after Twilight faded from my sight I heard an earsplitting sound from the castle. It was as if someone had decided to pick up a trumpet on a whim and try to play it, thinking they had years of practice. I could swear it was making my ears bleed.

“Who in their right mind let somepony who can’t play an instrument sound the horn,” I grumbled before the flugelhorn sounded again.

“Hear ye, hear ye,” echoed Twilight’s voice from the palace. “Princess Cadance and Prince Shining Armor do cordially invite you to the Crystal Faire!” Twilight’s proclamation of the Faire’s start drew the crystal ponies from their homes.

In a way, I think I was more grateful to the proclamation than actually earning the trust of the crystal ponies. Then again, they still seemed to scurry away from the jousting arena whenever I looked away from a mannequin I set up to practice on.

*****

As time wore on, I continued to practice, finding it helped fill the void caused by the lack of an opponent and audience. Occasionally, there would be a crystal pony that broke the norm to take a seat in the bleachers but it was always short lived. I felt like the laughing stock of the Faire, as if I was some dark and brooding stallion looking for attention. I just wanted them to enjoy themselves and I might just have to contend with being ignored for that to happen.

Once I repositioned myself in one lane of the jousting field, I started to imagine my opponent as somepony that was actually evil and stared at them. I smirked as my eyes focused on the imaginary foe. I saw a pony, clad in armor black as night and with eyes that felt like they could pierce my soul. In my imagination, this seemed like far more than just letting my mind wander. I wanted an opponent and Rainbow had to be held up by something.

The crowds would be cheering, calling my name.

Even if it was all in my head, it felt good. Just to visualize it was exhilarating. My focus towards the illusory target was so intense that I saw them begin to charge. I steeled myself and charged down the lane, my training lance ready to strike.

~~~~~

In reality…

Rainbow Dash’s eyes widened as her mate began galloping towards her, ready for a full attack.

~~~~~

“Woah,” she managed before soaring up, “what are ya doing Al?”

I snapped from my fantasy as soon as I caught sight of the blur of colors in Rainbow’s tail flew through my field of view. Grinding to a halt, wings unfurled in an attempt to slow myself even faster, my eyes darted in her direction. “Sorry, lack of an audience must be really getting to me.”

“You think? I told Pinkie you needed a helping hoof, she doesn’t realize what happens to you when you get restless.”

“So, nopony’s been coming by?”

I rolled my eyes. “Oh they’ve been coming around, long enough to relax on the bleachers and avoid eye contact. I really doubt I’ve heard the whole truth behind why we aren’t liked a whole lot.”

“Look, I’ve told you all I know. Twilight admits there isn’t much to work with so I wouldn’t get your hopes up. Maybe it’s just a bad reputation or some superstitious thing.”

“Maybe they’re hiding something.”

“And just who do you mean by that?”

“Princess Luna might be hiding something, or maybe the Nocturnes themselves are hiding it. I want to know why ponies are scared of me and nopony’s telling me just why that is!”

My little outburst seemed to do something to the passing crystal ponies. As I looked towards them, I noticed that many of them started to draw closer.

“Things went from bad to worse when your kind came to the empire,” hissed an old mare. No, if Granny Smith was old then this mare had to be ancient.

“Well I’m not here to make things bad,” I said plainly. “I’m here to handle the jousting demonstration.” I glanced over my shoulder and saw Rainbow getting her helmet on. “Now that my prismatic assistant is here we can begin.”

“Well you all do seem rather understaffed,” muttered a nearby stallion. “There’s just the seven of you right?”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to impose. I mean to say that this is all for you crystal ponies.”

“I understand that, but I’ve been talking with some of the other stallions around the empire. Well, the stallions that have been coming out to see the faire at least; we’re willing to pitch in if you want help.”

“That’d be great,” said Rainbow as she came up beside me. “Pinkie and Applejack have been running around and doing all the concession stands on their own so they could probably use a helping hoof. Sounds like a good idea right Al?”

“Yeah, I guess it wouldn’t hurt.” I smiled and looked back to the stallion before us. “Talk with either the pink earth pony or the orange earth pony for where you can help out. Tell them that Alex and Rainbow Dash said you could help out.”

The stallion nodded. “Shame I’ll miss you two and the jousting but I’ll need to tell the others. Take care!” As he departed, a few mares in the group went out to catch up with him.

Rainbow and I waved after them. “Good luck,” we called out enthusiastically.

“Now,” I said as I looked out to the remaining crystal ponies, “who’s ready to see some jousting?” The ponies that remained cheered as they headed up and onto the bleachers. It was comforting to see even the ancient looking mare heading up, an enthusiastic look on her face.

Rainbow nudged me. “You want the lane near the bleachers or the one further back big guy?”

“I’ll take the further back one, let you take center stage. We can always swap lanes later right.”

“Sure.”

*****

As time wore on, impact after impact dented both Dashie’s armor and my own. Neither of us dared give the other any quarter, knowing whoever received any handicap would exploit it for everything they could. As my gaze shifted from a newly splintered lance towards the audience I saw the crowd of cheering, shimmering ponies in earnest.

It was a pleasing sight, the formerly dull crystal ponies seemed to drag my attitude down, but as they shone in their seats, I was filled with confidence and determination. This was what we were performing, quite the sight to see. Pinkie had joined us along the way, clad in a suit that reminded me of a jester.

She had informed us about Twilight and the Crystal Heart when she arrived, but the three of us were too concerned with keeping the crystal ponies happy to question Twilight’s desire to go after the Heart on her own. Part of me wanted to go with Twilight, but as I collected a new lance, I felt like this was a better use of my time. Rather keep the crystal ponies happy than get a lecture.

As I took my place I saw Rainbow get back onto her hooves, I caught that determined fire in her eyes. We’d both lost count of who had been dropped more, but every time she got up she tried to make that the last time. She met my eyes and grinned, steeling herself for the next sounding of Pinkie’s flugelhorn. The tenacity Rainbow or I showed seemed like nothing compared to Pinkie’s improvement on the flugelhorn. In mere hours she had gone from sour notes to sounding like she had practiced for at least a few months.

Pinkie’s flugelhorn rang out, signaling Dashie and I to charge one another once more. My body ached more from the numerous charges than the collisions said charges brought.

“Rainbow Dash,” chanted several of the crystal ponies.

“Nocturne,” chanted the rest. Ever since we began, we tried to ignore using my name. After all, I still didn’t have a very ‘pony sounding’ name.

I caught sight of the the sky flickering the instant before Rainbow’s lance met my armor, sending me flying as her worn lance shattered. It had been quite a few connections since she had to replace hers so I had been expecting it for a while. After I fell on my back in a bale of hay, Rainbow came over to check on me.

“Still with me,” she asked me. “Noticed your attention drifted and I don’t want-”

“I caught sight of the sky,” I muttered. “We’re running out of time.”

5 - The Dark King

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Rainbow gestured for Pinkie to come over as soon as she helped me back onto my hooves.

“Is something wrong Alley,” she asked in a surprisingly quiet tone.

I shook my head and placed a hoof to it, making sure to act as though I was dealing with a concussion. “I saw the sky flickering,” I said as I glanced upwards. “What’s worse, it’s starting to flicker more frequently. Twilight hasn’t found the Crystal Heart yet and I don’t think we can hold out much longer.”

Pinkie nodded. “Even with all my party skills, I can’t keep this up forever.”

“All the crowd has to do is look back and they’ll see the barrier fading,” added Rainbow nervously. “I mean, we’re near the edge of the Faire so it won’t be hard for them to notice the thing getting weaker.”

I nodded. “As much as they’d probably love knowing I want nothing more than their safety, I doubt I’d be of use to anypony if something like what happened to Shining happened to me.”


Twilight glared at the doorway swirling around her and fired in a dark rage at the crystal that capped the arch. The door shone with a brilliant light and she sped forward.


It had all happened so fast. First Rainbow maintained eye contact with the sky as I helped her back up once more. That caused me to look up, trying to look as unobtrusive as possible. All I saw was an acidic orange across the sky.

Rainbow and I exchanged looks, but a thunderous laughter squashed any idea we had for keeping it quiet. Cadance was out of magic and it took all of five seconds for a crystal pony somewhere in the Faire to scream. Our enthralled audience looked around to see who screamed and it became chaos. I tossed my helmet aside and went out to the main road, staring out to the encroaching darkness with nothing but contempt for what was on it’s way.

I never expected to be staring a unicorn capable of enslaving an entire empire in the eye. I spread my wings open and took to the sky, mindful to keep his focus on me and not the fleeing crystal ponies. “Hey Smokey,” I called to him. “Not sure how you acted around us before, but you won’t find me bowing down to you anytime soon!”

“Thestral,” he hissed before firing black bolts towards me from his horn.

I dodged them with a quick dive. I quickly pulled up, just as Rainbow taught me, and into a corkscrew along his trailing body of smoke. “Thousand years kill your aim or something?”

His head swiveled around, his face showing nothing but fury, as his “body” was hoisted by the wind I whipped around him. “You will kneel,” he roared at me as he began to fire bolts of magic in my general direction.


Twilight cautiously neared her mentor. “Princess Celestia?” The alicorn princess ignored her, paying careful attention to a stack of paperwork hovering near her. “I was in the Empire, but how did I get here?”

“You should leave,” Princess Celestia said as she refused to look in Twilight’s direction.

“But what happened? I remember opening a door in the palace but how did I get here?”

Celestia’s eyes turned from her paperwork to barely look at Twilight. “You failed your test Twilight,” she said coldly.

“But-”

“Not only did you fail your test, but you will no longer be my student. I’ve sent word to Ponyville, you will not return there.”

“Then where will I go?”

“I’m assigning Alexander to attend the Nocturne’s academy,” Princess Celestia continued, “Rainbow Dash will go to the Wonderbolts for further training. I have already sent Spike to live with his own kind. That aside, I don’t care where you go. Just leave and never return.”

“But-”

“Guards,” Celestia said plainly as her gaze returned to her paperwork, “remove her from Canterlot.”

Twilight felt like the life was sucked out of her. Spike was gone and she was exiled from not just Ponyville, but from Canterlot as well. There would be no more lessons from the princess. Would her friends go looking for her when she never returned? What about Alex, would she ever see him again?

Twilight’s eyes were unfocused as she went willingly with two guards past a large stained glass window that depicted her failure and the return of King Sombra.

“-wilight,” echoed a voice in her head. It was very faint, but it called out her name again louder. By the time the voice was practically yelling in her ear, Twilight snapped out of her inner fears. She quickly stepped away from the doorway and shook her head.

She was back at the base of the stairs under the crystal palace’s throne room, but why Spike was there eluded her.

“I know you told me not to help but I got worried and you were here,” Spike stood where Twilight was a moment ago, “and you were looking at-”

Twilight’s eyes widened as he showed her what he saw.

“What, but why am I,” Spike mumbled in a daze. “Ponyville? Twilight what do you mean I-”

Twilight cut him off by slamming the enchanted doorway shut. “I get it,” she said sternly. “It’s a door that shows you your deepest fears.”

“I was in Ponyville, you said you no longer needed me. That Alex was more than enough help.”

Twilight wrapped one of her forelegs around him and pulled the baby dragon into a tight hug. “Just because he’s my husband doesn’t mean I don’t need your help. I know nopony says it enough but we will always need you Spike.”


I managed to evade King Sombra’s wild assault of magic, even if only by a hair at times. At least until I found myself against the wall of one of the buildings not corrupted by his presence. As one of his attacks finally made full contact, I crumpled against the wall. Slowly everything was fading but deep down, I knew it wasn’t from the pain. The last thing I heard before everything went black was a scream somewhere off in the distance.

6 - The Mirror's Pony

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When I came to, I was surrounded by a blue hue. As I looked around for the source, I found a single floating candle with a blue flame. Beyond the light of the candle was darkness, absolute and unyielding darkness.

“Hello,” I called out.

No response came.

I paced around under the light of the candle, wracking my brain for options. Not much came to mind aside from testing the dark realm beyond the candle’s light. I carefully moved to the edge of the light, close enough to see nothing but darkness before me. I raised a cautious hoof and pushed it into the darkness. A smile came to my face when I pulled it back, nothing had happened.

“So,” I said to myself, “the darkness isn’t harmful but if I venture into it I won’t have the light of the candle to make sure I don’t trip over anything or see what I may run into. However, if I stay by the candle then I run the risk of something out there finding me when it sees the candlelight.” I looked back, barely seeing the faint light of the candle. “This should be the extent of my moonlight vision after all.” I took in a deep breath. “I guess it’s into the breach,” I murmured to the emptiness before striding into absolute darkness.

*****

I felt like I had been wandering around in the pitch-black void for hours with nothing but the dull sound of my hooves against the ground. The silence was maddening but it was nothing compared to emptiness.

“Can you believe he actually thought that,” called a high voice in the darkness.

“I know,” replied a second, “some ponies can be so naïve.”

“Even after all that mushy stuff he still thought we were there for him,” said the first one with a laugh.

“Too messed up even for me to tolerate,” murmured a third voice. It was deep and masculine.

“What would you know,” shrieked the second one, “you seem like you’d sympathize with him.”

“Well I-”

“Remove the male sympathizer,” shrieked the first voice.

I tried to nearer to the source of these voices as quietly as possible, the sound of the first two voices straining to move what I could only assume to be the source of the third one.

By the time I was nearly on top of them I saw a large crack cut its way across the sky. Whatever the sources of the voices were had become nothing compared to the blinding light that shone through the crack in the sky.

*****

My eyes snapped open and I barely rose a few inches before I was wracked by pain that didn’t stem from injuries. Everything was blurry and almost unrecognizable.

“Hey stay down,” spoke a voice to my left. “Take it easy.”

“What happened,” I asked weakly.

“You’ve been out of it for a week Al,” replied a blurry array of colors.

“Dashie?”

“The doc said you would be fine after a few days, lotta broken bones from the fall and the initial impact.”

“I remember being hit and the wall, but a week. I’ve been out that long?”

“Yeah, Twilight went on ahead to Canterlot but she said she’d come back as soon as possible.”

“We’re still in the Empire?” I squinted, trying desperately to focus on Rainbow.

“Yeah, but just relax. I mean it. Your body’s still recovering and you shouldn’t push it. If we didn’t find you as fast as we did,” the blurry figure of Rainbow shuddered, “I dunno if you’d still be in one piece. I mean, even Princess Cadance said all she could do was make sure you got the best treatment. She helped Twilight set most of your bones back in place. They also had to restrain you when you started thrashing in bed.”

“How bad was it Dashie?”

“You ever see a bone sticking out of someone’s body before? There was a lot of that. When we got somepony up here with modern equipment, he said you broke nearly every bone in your body. I was afraid you were…”

“I’m not and that’s what counts right?”

“Yeah, get some rest now okay? I’m gonna tell Princess Cadance you woke up.”

“Why do you want to tell her?”

“You mean aside from being our sister-in-law? A bunch of the crystal ponies were really happy that you were still alive after what happened. You remember that one super old mare? She started a petition to make sure you got a medal or something. She’s been sending flowers every day like some crazy stalker too. I’ll find out if the princess decided to cave into the pressure.”

“She shouldn’t play favorites to her brother-in-law, even if it appeases the masses.”

Rainbow’s blurry figure came closer and kissed my cheek. “That’s enough talking for now. Get some more rest, focus on healing, and I’ll be back here before you know it.”

I nodded and rested my head on my pillow. Focusing on healing sounded like a good idea after Rainbow left.

*****

I spent the rest of the day gradually recovering my sight and listening to a few doctors drone on about how lucky I was to survive everything. Despite what doctors shuffling in through the day said, I didn’t feel like I was in pain at all. I shared this notion with Twilight after she came to visit me late that night.

“I’m sure you feel that way because your body is nearly healthy enough to get you released from the hospital.” She leaned in and kissed me with a primal desire that made my body squirm, begging to be free.

“Do you remember anything other than being hit so hard,” she asked as soon as our lips parted.

“An expanse of pure darkness,” I replied, “hooves echoing against the hard ground.” I wrapped a foreleg around her neck and looked past her to Rainbow. “I never want to be anywhere like that again.”

“You won’t have to,” Twilight looked over her shoulder to Rainbow, passed out in a nearby chair. “I’m sure she’d say the same thing if she didn’t try to stay awake since you were found.”

“So, when am I getting out of this bed?”

“Cadance wants to present you with a medal tomorrow afternoon and we can be on the first train after that.”

“Do you think he did anything to me?”

“He,” Twilight’s grip on me tightened, “he had a trap waiting for anyone who went looking for the Crystal Heart. It was a door that uses dark magic to enslave your mind; placing you in your greatest fears. If Spike didn’t go with me then I’m sure King Sombra would have us all under his spell. Because of that, I doubt he would’ve taken your means of defense lightly.”

“Is everything okay Twi? He didn’t mess your head up did he?”

“I don’t think so but it rattled me at the time. That was a trap in the castle but if he did something to you then-I don’t know what I could do to help. Your body was-I had a hard time looking at it some of the time I was supposed to be working and helping Cadance. If he did something to make you not really you anymore then I don’t think I-”

“I’d put up a strong defense against you trying to keep me from harm’s way Twi. If there’s lasting damage then we’ll do what we can to mitigate it. We all made a choice to stand beside each other up there, on that altar, even though Dashie lost her train of thought when she was trying to remember the vows she came up with.”

Twilight kissed my cheek. “I was hoping you’d bring up that. The part where we swore to be together I mean, not Rainbow’s mistake at the altar. Anyways, I hope you don’t mind if I get some rest over here.” She pointed her hoof to a nearby vacant couch. “I’d rather not wake Rainbow or try to find a way to fit us all on your bed.”

7 - A Well-Deserved Reprieve

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As far as I was aware, neither Twilight nor Rainbow woke before I stirred at sunrise the next day. There was no peace in my slumber; the crack that brought the waking world back to me after a weeklong nightmare was the only solace I could find in the realm of dreams. I could only stare at the ceiling as I waited for either mare to stir from their slumber and help peace return to my mind. Minutes blurred into an hour before swearing finally broke the silence.

“Why in the name of all that lives and breathes is Twilight so relaxed while half my bucking body is numb and the rest is as sore as a mare after her honeymoon?”

“You are a mare after her honeymoon,” I replied dully. Despite my eyes fixed on the shallow shadow hanging between the top of my room’s window and the ceiling, I still knew Rainbow was slowly making her way to me.

“Something wrong Al,” she asked as she tiled my head towards her.

I gave her a weak smile. “It’s just something on my mind Dashie, nothing life changing. Twilight said I’m getting outta here today and I think it’s about time we get back to Ponyville and all the normalcy that brings.”

Rainbow looked like she was exerting every fiber of her being just to hold back her laughter.

“Dashie, it beats lying in a hospital bed like a vegetable all day. I want to get back to some boring day-to-day life and some stupid day-to-day choices. I’m sore, I’m a bit stir-crazy, and I need some fresh air flowing through my mane.”

By the time I finished ranting, Rainbow had managed to have placated her urge to laugh. “I’ll see about getting you out of this bed Al. If she wakes up, tell Twi where I went alright?”

“Yeah,” I rolled my eyes, “it’s not like I’m going anywhere right?” She kissed me before snickering; leaving me to return to the silence that once more would be my plague.

After Twilight woke a few minutes later, I relayed Rainbow’s message and she too left me to the silence of a vacant room. I barely noticed when they returned with one of the doctors who watched over me to say that it was time for me to leave my bed, nor the crowd of crystal ponies waiting for Twilight, Rainbow, and I when we left for the palace.

When we reached the Crystal Palace, I continued to follow Twilight in silence. I tried to put on a brave face for the Crystal Ponies, to show them that I was all right, but deep down I knew something was wrong. Why would somepony as cautious as Sombra seemed leave me to bleed out under some rubble. Why not ensure I was no longer a threat by tormenting me just as his trap did to Twilight?

My mind was periodically interrupted from exploring these notions by words such as ‘bravery’ and ‘valor’ during a speech Princess Cadance had prepared before presenting me with a gold medal shaped like the Crystal Heart. These distractions helped me remain attentive through the ceremony, but I felt consumed with my thoughts once the ceremony concluded. With rushed goodbyes, reminiscent of my first trip to Canterlot with Twilight, Cadance and Shining Armor saw us off at the train station.

*****

Now that I had a moment to concentrate on what I was mulling over, I wanted to do anything but dwell on past events. It’ll play out, I told myself, no sense in forcing it.

“Now we’re really returning home in victory,” squealed Rainbow as she attempted to break the growing silence that emphasized how empty the train was.

“Yeah,” I replied wearily. “Sorry, I’m just hoping Pinkie doesn’t want to throw an ‘Alex is Back’ party or something. I’d like to get back to the job for a few days, if only to remind me that there’s more to being with you both than saving Equestria,” my lips curled into a mischievous grin, “or things best left locked at home so we don’t have to explain it away when-”

“Wait,” Twilight interrupted, “you want to bring that up now?”

“Well you did want the porter to get it,” Rainbow objected. “Just because he asked did not mean you let him help with that trunk.”

“A mare finds a relic lost for ages to help save an empire-”

“And all she gets is grief from her family,” I finished much to Twilight’s frustration. “If it makes you feel any better I’m not as moody as I was this morning Twi.”

Twilight sighed and nodded. “I can understand going stir-crazy. You have any idea what that whole ‘tardy thing’ made me feel like when I saw it from the perspective of an audience?”

“Didn’t you say how embarrassed you were to have shown that side of yourself to your friends, doubly so for having so many strangers seeing you act like that?”

Rainbow put her hoof in front of Twilight’s mouth before she could reply. “Think anything’s gonna come through the computer cause of this whole Crystal Empire thing?”

I wanted to say ‘yes’ almost on reflex but I wasn’t sure anymore. “I’m not sure if the spell works that way. I mean, if it did then we would have already seen something happen. That was the sort of thing that ends a season,” I paused and let my thoughts recombine, “unless there was some other event that they planned to end the season on that would have far more dramatic consequences.”

Twilight shook her head. “There’s no way they’d show any of that nightmare fuel to the intended audience right?”

Rainbow cleared her throat. “Well, they got away with Chrysalis didn’t they? She wasn’t made of nightmare fuel right? Just, you know, fool everyone and nearly overthrow Princess Celestia by pretending to be Cadance. I’m sure there wasn’t any trauma that whole thing could’ve caused.”

“They didn’t show the guards who actually died from having an army of changelings swarm them. Or what Princess Luna was doing, how she actually killed several changelings while sending others flying into just about anything with the sheer volume of her Royal Canterlot Voice.”

Rainbow opened her mouth to say something but, much to Twilight’s pleasure, she quickly closed it.

“Twi, didn’t she explain that she was yelling at them for waking her up ten minutes after she finally managed to get to sleep,” I asked after several minutes of awkward silence.

“That only helps prove my point Alex, if they show it then they won’t show me being dragged away from the throne room and tormented like some sort of torture porn because I was reckless.”

“They’d snap to reality before that happened and just make you look like an empty shell until Spike got your attention.”

Rainbow bit her lip. “Twi, how long did you think you were in that nightmare?”

Twilight shrunk a little in her seat. “Can we not talk about that? Please?”

I shuffled in my seat and rested a hoof on her shoulder. “It’ll be okay Twi, if you ever need to let it out then we’re here to help you sort out your fears.”

She looked to me and smiled, Rainbow nodded contently behind her. “Hate to break the tender moment but the same goes for you Al. I mean there’s no doubt you’re troubled, something happened when he retaliated didn’t it?”

I nodded solemnly. “I’ve no doubt he was at the source of my situation. I was thinking about it all day and I’m sure that he did something to me, probably to do more than unnerve me. You know, in case I survived. Based on what you said Twi, I’m certain he had planned for possible scenarios. Possible cases where he would’ve failed, where he would ensure that those who brought about his demise would suffer even in victory.”

“Well then, what do you think we should do Al?”

I looked passed Rainbow, our train car passing into a tunnel as a smile came across my face. I got out of my seat and tried to scoot the two of them apart so I could sit between them. “We count our blessings Dashie. We’re all alive and as long as we’re together we are stronger than any darkness that could plague Equestria.”

I felt the full weight of both of them press against me, confirmed beyond a shadow of a doubt when an attendant on the train came in to light the lamps in our car. Half of the ride back to Ponyville would be shrouded as we had just become, through tunnels that carved a path through the mountainous northern border of Equestria.

*****

By the time Ponyville came into sight, according to my eyes at least, it was closing on ten o’clock. Even now, late in the summer, the sun seemed to set no later than eight thirty. The part that I always found odd was how dark it got in the time past sunset and tonight’s overcast night sky did nothing to help either Twilight or Rainbow for when the train would pull up to the station.

“What’s it look like out there Al,” Rainbow asked me as I did my best to evaluate what state the weather would be in at the station.

“I see some lights in town,” I relayed, “but they’re slowly thinning out. If the clock’s been regularly looked after during our honeymoon then it’s about five minutes to ten. Parents are trying to get their fillies and colts back into a sleep schedule that’s fitting for school and I’d wager a wing that they’ll do what they can with the ‘lead by example’ concept. Either that or Pinkie has the whole town in on a surprise party moment when we finally arrive.”

“How much longer do you think we have until we get to Ponyville,” Twilight asked me.

“Not enough time to play another round of ‘adult Twister’ if that’s what you mean Twi. That would be ten to fifteen minutes minimum, twenty tops.”

Rainbow groaned in response to my answer. “You know one of us has needs this time of the year,” she added as she rubbed her temples. “Ya know, I have so many urges this time of year and I need you to help me fix that.”

“I thought we agreed not to have foals yet,” objected Twilight.

“I’m with Twi on this one, I mean the trash can’s already half-filled with the condoms we had left from Hayvanna. I understand you have needs Dashie but there are a few problems in regards to sex right now. Firstly, we agreed we aren’t ready for foals. I thought we all agreed that can wait for a couple of years. Secondly, if we still agree about that then we’re out of condoms to prevent premature pregnancy, that goes double for back home. I’m serious, we’ve run out and that’s including the emergency stores. Thirdly, we got in trouble the last few times because we were disrupting the ponies in the car in front of us. You remember how much we tried last time to keep it down and how badly that didn’t work right?”

“Well, yeah but-”

“Lastly, we don’t have enough time for more since I know foreplay for the three of us will last nine minutes minimum and you know that’s with some idealistic guesswork on my part. Even if it’s just you and me, that’s three minutes of teasing each other’s wings, two more minutes with the sensitive parts of each other’s body, and nine more minutes before we finish. We can agree that if we all don’t get off then-.”

“Okay, I get it geez. You’re taking after Twi too much sometimes, you know that right?”

I rolled my eyes as the train began to slow down and the conductor opened the door leading into our car. “Everypony getting off at Ponyville, you have five minutes before we reach the station. I repeat, five minutes until Ponyville station.”

After he left I whispered to them. “I’ll get more after work tomorrow and we can resume that night alright?”

Rainbow sighed and looked to Twilight. “Sounds good for you that we continue this tomorrow night Twi?”

“Sure,” she replied optimistically.

I turned to look at Twilight, completely flabbergasted at her response.

“It’s completely biological Alex,” she explained. “The more it’s satiated, the better Rainbow will feel around the house, but more importantly around Ponyville. Not tormenting other ponies with the allure of her…erm…needs would be the best thing you can do as her mate. Remember what I was like back at the end of spring,” Twilight fluttered her eyelashes, “it’s what you have to accept because you married more than one mare. You have to make it work when it comes to both of us, especially since, as different kinds of ponies, we’re fertile at different times during spring and summer. Spring is the time for earth ponies, the first half of summer is for unicorns, and pegasi are the second half. Well, there are some outliers but, by the book, that’s the majority of each kind of pony. What I managed to find in my and Rainbow’s research on the topic is that there are some occasional times in a mare’s life when they have other short periods where their estrus cycle triggers for a few weeks.”

“I remember when we found that. They’re times that are unknown to mares when that’d happen. Stuff like is why there are some ponies that are born in the fall and winter,” finished Rainbow. “It makes sense Al. I mean like, I know that Fluttershy was born twelve days before Nightmare Night. Before you ask, it’s ‘cause I’ve been friends with her for almost forever so I better know her birthday.”

Twilight nodded. “I knew a few ponies like that in Canterlot too. Well, mostly thanks to Spike but still, they were ponies that had minor anomalies from the average estrus cycle times.”

As the train came to a halt, we left the car that we spent the last several hours as a sanctuary from the rest of Equestria. There was nopony there to greet us and there were only a few lights remaining in town. Thanks to my natural nocturnal advantages, I acted as Twilight and Rainbow’s guide back home. Back to the place where we would collapse in bed for the night, ready to handle the return to everyday life we were in for.

8 - Back in the Saddle?

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In the morning, I checked the computer just to be sure what we had talked about, hadn’t transpired. Much to my curiosity, the computer’s clock had finally changed its date from August 27th, 2012 to November 10th, 2012. It struck me as a truly odd event since it displayed August 27th ever since my first week in Equestria. No sooner had I flipped through a few websites, to see what had passed in the missing “two weeks” than I noticed a link to a livestream of…

Friendship is Magic Season 3 two-part premiere?”

“What,” screamed Rainbow as she rushed to my side. “Look at the title!”

The Crystal Empire parts one and two,” I recited. “Well, so much for trying to prevent people from dealing with nightmare fuel, right Dashie?”

She rolled her eyes, “I doubt it’s gonna be scary.”

“Guys,” chirped Twilight as she joined us, “Spike’s done making waffles and-and Rainbow, you were right weren’t you?”

“I’ll say it again, I doubt it’s gonna be scary.”

*****

With Twilight’s assistance I dusted off the cables and hooked the computer up to the TV, all the while Spike and Rainbow brought breakfast to the table for us.

“I know I gotta get to work and everything but we need to know right,” Rainbow asked as she slumped onto the couch.

“But Alex has been in Equestria for more than a year,” Spike said as he helped himself to extra syrup. “How come it’s taken this long for the show to catch up to us?” As he waited for an answer, the train was pulling into the station out in the arctic wasteland on the TV.

“I’m willing to wager it’s some lag in the series to edit me out,” I answered. “See, look. Twi,” I began pointing everyone out when they got off the train, as if to emphasize my vanishing act in the show, “Pinkie, Dashie, AJ, Fluttershy, Rarity, Spike, and cut away while Spike tries to collect scarves that are flying away. Just like magic, I’m mysteriously absent from the show.”

“So we’re seeing the events that just happened a little over a week ago but without Al or anything to do with him,” asked Rainbow, making sure to speak over the episode to keep even Spike’s focus.

“I suppose so,” mumbled Twilight. “It seems the show and Equestria are separated by more than the few changes we already noticed. I hypothesize that it isn’t limited to time and a safety bubble for worried parents. Whole events will be missing, just like how Alex probably won’t be in the series at all. Don’t you remember Rainbow, Alex was right next to me when the train left us at the station.”

“Yeah, I also remember that your brother showed up a lot later than he did in this thing.”

Through the rest of the stream, we continued to pick the episodes apart. It became a little like a game by the time everyone reached the library in the Empire. The thing we found the most entertaining though was the singing.

“Nopony sang at all did they,” asked Spike after the credits began to roll at the end of the second part. “I mean, I was with Twilight most of the time so I don’t know.”

“We didn’t sing about getting the Faire together,” I replied. “Any singing after I went under?”

“None,” replied Twilight, “everypony was too worried about what happened to you. Pinkie knew it was too serious to try to cheer anypony up in her usual way. She could’ve been losing a friend forever, we-we could have…” As she trailed off, Twilight leaned into me. I knew she was trying her hardest not to cry.

“I’m not going anywhere Twi,” I told her as I began to stroke her mane. With my free wing, I grabbed Rainbow and pulled her in tightly. Unfortunately, I caught Spike’s scowl. He seemed far from pleased that I would leave him out of this family bonding moment. At least until I gestured for him to come over with my head, trying to remain silent during this emotional moment but still try my best to remind him that he was part of this family and that I would never intentionally try to keep him from being there.

“You’ll always be part of this family,” I whispered to him after he managed to scramble between Twilight and me so he could wrap his arms around Twilight’s neck. “It would never be the same if you were ever gone Spike. Never forget that alright?”

“This is all well and good but I need to get to work,” Rainbow said with a sniffle. “Need more clouds in the sky.”

“And I have to strong hoof the copy of Fifty Shades of Neigh that Rarity has had checked out for the last,” Twilight paused for a moment, “six months so somepony else can read it.” Twilight sniffled and tried to focus on her plan, not how red and puffy her eyes were. “I just don’t want it to get violent,” she added bitterly.

Both Spike and I released the two so they could get to work. “The clock needs an overhaul so I have to go in and fix it,” I said before looking to Spike. “Spike, I’m sorry if I sound like a pain, but could you please handle the dishes? I mean, I don’t want you to feel like some sort of maid but if we don’t focus on what’s at hoof then we’ll lose track of time and nopony wants us to do that.”

“It’s fine,” he said proudly before hopping off the couch, “I know your job is a lot more important than it seems at first. If it wasn’t, then I know you’d help me out. I’ll meet you at the library when I’m done, ok Twi?”

She smiled and nodded. “Of course I’ll need my number one assistant to help me out today, even if we’ll just be spending the day reshelving and cleaning the library up.”

“Tidying up the library? I don’t see anything wrong there. I mean, after the last few days I’d consider it a welcome vacation. Nothing life changing to stress over or something that places the fate of Equestria in the hooves of seven ponies and this dragon’s claws to deal with is the definition of vacation right?”

We all, Spike included, laughed at his question. It was quite uplifting to hear something other than someone trying to avoid saying what would happen if one of us was no longer among the living for a change.

*****

By the time I was back in the clock tower I felt like everything we saw, everything that nearly ended my life, that it was all just a distant memory. In its own way, the turning of gears put me at ease rather than give me a migraine. If I was willing to make a pun, I would endure the groan-inducing bat in his belfry shtick in relative silence.

After reviewing the work done in my absence, much to my astonishment I found most of the mechanism working properly. “She must’ve gotten on his case enough,” I mumbled while rolling a disconnected gear out from the far side of my office. It was about time for me to get off my lazy rear and set some lofty perch in the tower. “If I want this to blend in but not get in anything’s way,” I trailed off to scan the mechanism carefully.

“-and I don’t care if you thought you saw Rainbow Dash eating hayfries back there,” screeched a very familiar irate mare. The mere notion of what will happen to me once she discovers that I’m here made me turn my spare gear to hide from view.

“I just wanted a bite to eat,” Thunderlane whined, “and I really mean it Blossomforth. I really did see Rainbow Dash; she was talking with Vinyl and Pinkie about something over a platter of hayfries with the works.”

I couldn’t see what was going on from the other side of my clockwork cover but the logical part of my mind and the irrational part were actually in agreement that staying put was the best bet. I was either in the eye of the storm or happy I would not actually see Thunderlane’s demise.

“Hey, was this gear out when you came to check on me Blossomforth?”

Crap.

9 - Summer's End

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“Are my ears still bleeding,” I asked Thunderlane later that day.

“Just a little from the left, you know, from where she bit you. You know a good, discrete, doctor for wings?”

“Nah, I don’t think you have the clout, money, or favors to get Doctor Stable to patch you up with one of his borderline malpractice treatments.” Don’t get me wrong, Stable’s a great doctor. It’s just that he’s completely out of his mind. The only reason I can ever see him is that I know the right ponies to convince Ponyville Medical to let me see him. “Are you sure you don’t just want to find somepony else? She will be the death of you one of these days.”

“Why do you-”

“I’ve already been saved from death Thunderlane and I think she’ll be the end of me if you remain with her. I’ve already used my ‘get out of the morgue’ card and I think the next time will be for keeps.”

“Even if we break up don’t you think she’ll suspect that you’re behind it?”

“What, so I’m one of those ponies trying to stop an event but just hastening it? That’s what you’re saying right?”

“It’s nothing like that, it’s just-”

“Please, as a friend, I just don’t think it’s a good match if she just bosses you around. It has nothing to do with the fact she beat two fully-grown stallions to a pulp and one of them just happened to be me. If she wants to stay with you, you’ve got to put your hoof down and set some ground rules so you don’t have to come up with an excuse to tell your doctor.”

Thunderlane hung his head in defeat. “I guess you’re right. I don’t want to yell at Blossomforth, or any other mare, but she’s gone too far this time.” He rested a hoof on my shoulder, causing me to wince in pain. “I just want you to know that I consider you my best friend.”

*****

“Geez Al, who beat you up today,” was the first thing that I heard when I finally made my way home. My guess is that it was just what’s left of a defense mechanism Rainbow had from some time before I met her.

“Not as important as my ability to convince Thunderlane that it’s high time he lays down the law with Blossomforth,” I replied. “She didn’t just rough us up; she beat us to a pulp when I tried to lay down the law. The clock tower’s my responsibility again, not Thunderlane’s, and she can’t dictate his every action. It’s not fair for him if it affects other ponies like this.”

“At least you managed to walk away from it right?”

“How about we stop talking and get to dinner alright?” I leaned forward and let my nose do the thinking. “Smells like it’s just about-”

“Dinner’s ready,” called Twilight from inside.

“Lousy super senses,” grumbled Rainbow as she helped me along to dinner.

*****

After the expected questions about my condition, things seemed to settle back to something we had been lacking for too long: a semblance of normalcy. Given who lives in this house, normal seems like such a strange word to even consider.

Twilight took a calm sip of tea as she calmly applied her magic to retrieve thirds. “You weren’t here last time Alex, but it’s almost time for the Summer Wrap-Up Festival.”

I cocked an eye. “Is it anything like Winter Wrap-Up?”

“It’s more laid back, especially since the Running of the Leaves is only a few days after that. It’s a lot more like a carnival but with some work after that.”

“Yeah, but the real work comes with the race,” commented Rainbow. “We can really kick back and enjoy the games and rides and stuff.”

“A few of my friends from Canterlot will be here to say hi, but I still want us to have a good time as a family.”

I smiled. “So when does it all start?”

“Tomorrow,” Rainbow replied. “I’ll have to get up early and do all my work so we can all enjoy the carnival.”

Twilight nodded, “I think we should all get to bed early tonight. I don’t think any of us want to miss something like this.”

I glanced from Twilight to Rainbow, each wearing the same expression that made my skin crawl. “Why are you both so enthusiastic about a carnival?”

Spike rolled his eyes before getting up from his seat and began clearing dishes, much to the pale look on Twilight’s face.

*****

“Somshing ou need to hell me,” I asked Twilight later on that night when that look on her face returned to me. As these things often do, this returned to my mind when I least expected it to: halfway through brushing my teeth at half past midnight.

“I lost track of time when you were in the hospital for too long,” she replied as she flossed. She seemed far more focused than me, not exactly something I would find out of place, but that felt rehearsed.

I cocked an eye as I spat out my toothpaste. “It’s not like you to go for thirds though. Are you sure nothing’s wrong?”

“I just knew what was in store for me after dinner. Look back in there and tell me Rainbow’s awake. She only had one helping at dinner,” she grinned mischievously as she tossed her floss in the trash, “but she still got thirds ten minutes ago.”

I rolled my eyes. “I think you girls will be the death of me. First you, then Dashie, this whole summer’s been exhausting in the bedroom.”

“Doubling the mares means you need to be prepared for doubling their fun,” she replied with a suggestive wink.

After finishing up myself, I returned to see both Twilight and Rainbow almost completely opposite from each other. Dashie was taking up as much space as she could on one side of the bed, snoring with her mouth wide open. Contrary to that, Twilight seemed to shrink on the other side of the bed as she slumbered silently. The instant I hit the bed though, I was met with both latching onto me like a vice. Yep, I thought as I tried in vain to sleep, they’re going to kill me.

10 - The Carnival

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The morning felt like a blur after I woke. From shower, to work, to noon, it all felt like it passed in the blink of an eye. No, it was what I wanted to feel once more. I wanted the sensation that everything had gone back to normal and it made me feel like everything in the Empire never happened. I knew it still happened, but there’s something about Ponyville that just clears the problems from your mind if you let it. It’s hard to put to words what I mean, especially after you’ve had a run-in with the Crusaders, but there’s a tranquility hidden in the mindless acts of anarchy that can crop up in such a ‘quaint town in the plains of Equestria.’

Even when the clockwork mechanism under my care obscured the rest of Ponyville from my eyes, I could sense the anticipation in the air that told me Pinkie was at work doing Luna knows what and that Cheerilee was still shaping young minds with a smile on her face. I had remained focused on my job even though I still anticipated some strange incident to drag me into itself by the end of the day.

With a job well done, I took in a deep breath and smiled. Sure, I may have just inhaled a deep breath of musty, dust-riddled air, but I felt at peace with even the mild coughing that would soon follow.

*****

As I calmly cleared my throat upon exiting the clock tower, I bumped into something large and red. Something that should have told me I knew I was in for strangeness throughout the night.

“Do you happen to have any nails up there Alex,” asked Big Mac.

I took a moment to wrack my brain regarding the odd, unexpected question. “Sorry Mac, used my last box of them about an hour ago fixing a railing on the second floor and replacing a few of the third floor stairs. Would you be able to use screws for whatever your project is?”

“I’d rather not. Not after what happened to it already.”

“Wait, don’t tell me–”

“Eyup.”

“Did you at least lecture them?”

“I wish I had the chance. You know how fast they can be.”

“Yeah, be sure to lecture them if you have the chance later tonight. No doubt they’ll be at the carnival.” At the mention of the carnival, Big Mac seemed to seize up. “Wait,” I looked towards the carnival, and back from where Big Mac had come from, the wreckage where the gazeebo in the park told me what he intended to use the nails for. “You have to cut through all of that to get to the hardware store don’t you?”

“’Fraid so.”

I sighed and patted his shoulder. “My friend, I wish you the very best of luck.” I can’t afford to involve myself, I silently added.

As he trudged gloomily towards the carnival, I felt every possible twinge of guilt anyone could ever feel strike at my heart. Concealed within that guilt though was a faint silver lining: the fact that I just evaded Ponyville being as I expected.

I did my best to hold onto that sensation of dodging a bullet as I passed other ponies destined for the carnival in my awkward sidestepping of the festivities to meet up with Rainbow and Twi at the library.

*****

No less than two minutes after meeting up with them in front of the library was I met with a very familiar remark…

“I know you can run a clock perfectly Al, but can you please be on time in the future?” Rainbow’s remark was met with a scornful look from Twilight.

“Unlike somepony I intend to go easy on my wings,” I replied, doing my best to ignore any negativity. “I’m not exactly a normal pegasus so I have to take advice for one with a less than optimistic view. For example, I don’t molt, though I do shed more than anypony else.”

“But we didn’t figure that out until summer began and you were losing buckets of fur by then,” commented Twilight. “That’s why we got that heavy duty brush and dusted the vacuum off.”

I nodded, a wide grin dominating my face. “I’m looking forward to fall. It’s nearly been a whole year since I came to Equestria remember?”

Rainbow nudged me in the ribs. “Doesn’t feel that long to me.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Well, after acclimating to everyday life in Ponyville, not to mention a recent near-death experience, I can understand if Alex lost track of time but you Rainbow? Really, how could you forget about that?”

“But do you know what fall means Twilight? It means it’s almost cider season. Nightmare Night! The Running of the Leaves!” Rainbow leaned against me. The unexpected shift of the full weight of her body, which I really should have expected, made me nearly lose my balance. “We’re gonna be so busy. Especially you Al. I’d like it if you’re in on the race this year.”

The year prior, I had gone with Spike in the balloon, providing plenty of commentary. Somehow, someway Pinkie had stolen first place hopping the whole way through Whitetail Woods. I suppose you could just accept it because it’s Pinkie, but you weren’t there. In my time in Equestria I’ve seen things, strange things, indescribable things, things that make less sense than you’ve come to accept when you think of Pinkie. Many are hard to describe while others can only be summed up as ‘you had to be there.’

After successfully managing to brush Rainbow off my side, I was in a mood to focus on the conversation again. “When do we sign up for it?”

“Six weeks from Monday,” replied Twilight. “More than enough time to get the training out of Rainbow’s system.”

“We’ll start Monday morning,” added Rainbow. “Four-no five days a week should get you all ready in time Al. We still have most of fall to prep for the race but you’ve had plenty of endurance training so we’ll just focus on your speed and form.” We all knew what Rainbow meant when she mentioned endurance and no, I don’t mean in the bedroom. That’s a different kind of stamina.