Very Serious Business

by RunicTreetops

First published

You have some extremely important matters to attend to, by order of Ms. Harshwhinny.

Ms. Harshwhinny is a bit infamous for her cold, serious demeanor. She's a mare that knows how to get things done. She's a professional, for crying out loud!

How you, a human, ended up getting ordered around by her is a long story. Either way, you have some very serious business to attend to tonight.

Very Serious Business

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“Harshwhinny again, huh?”

Marble Counter, a gruff-looking stallion with a gray coat and jet-black mane, gives you a knowing grin as he punches numbers into the cash register.

“That obvious, huh?” you ask with a sheepish smile as you rub the back of your head.

“Well,” he muses while scratching at his short beard with his free hoof, “it’d be one thing if you were just buying dinner. It’s something else entirely when you buy a handful of sweet rolls.” He lowers his thick glasses, the grin never leaving his face. “Let me guess. It’s to help de-stress after what she puts you through?”

“Something like that,” you chuckle.

The register makes a loud metallic sound as Counter finishes ringing you up. You reach into your wallet and hand over the appropriate amount of bits before waving the friendly stallion goodbye.

The cool Manehattan breeze washes over you the second you step out of the bodega. Countless noises fill the city streets, from carriages ferrying ponies across the block to the numerous pedestrians walking every which way. Even now, with the sun having already set, the city is alive with energy.

You, meanwhile, couldn’t be more tired.

You’ve been working for Ms. Harshwhinny for almost two years now. That mare really knows how to get around, and her name carries weight pretty much all across Equestria. Not just anypony can be the head of the Equestria Games, after all.

Despite what most ponies think, such a position is a year-round job. A massive event like the Equestria Games requires so much planning and involves so many moving parts that her work is never done. Though, even if it were, she’d still have work to do regardless. She’s a businessmare first and foremost, and she finds it inadequate to only work one job anyway.

You, on the other hand, are just about as far from a “professional” as it gets. Your arrival in Equestria was sudden, unexpected, and for a time, emotionally devastating. It’s a good thing that the ponies around here are open and friendly, otherwise you might have been way worse off.

Then, while you were attending the Equestria Games a few years later, you bumped into Ms. Harshwhinny by complete accident. At first, she was absolutely disgusted by your human form. To an extent, she still might be. However, that disgust did not overpower her intrigue. The next thing you knew, the two of you ended up chatting for quite some time.

You’re not sure why you connected the way you did. It’s not like you have a whole lot in common. Perhaps it was the way that she tried to maintain an air of professionalism despite her clear excitement while watching the games. Perhaps she appreciated having someone to talk to who wasn’t afraid of that professional demeanor and would treat her like an equal.

Either way, you ended up staying in touch.

About a year of back-and-forth letters and the occasional visit later, you were given an opportunity. If you wanted, you could move all the way to Manehattan to work as her assistant. Her duties were constantly piling up, and while she isn’t the type of mare to back down from a challenge, even she knows when she has her hooves full.

You, meanwhile, were happy to lend her a helping hand. Also, she was going to pay you extremely well. Being a mare like her has its perks.

However, today has been… rough. As the years have gone on, work has only continued to pile up. You’ve been taking on more and more responsibility in response (you’re still not sure how much she appreciates that) and you’ve gotten quite good at filling out paperwork, but not even that is enough to stop the endless flow of work.

To say that you’re tired would be an understatement.

With grocery bags in each hand, you march down the busy Manehattan sidewalk. Being the only human in Equestria, you’re a whole lot taller than the average pedestrian. If it weren’t for the fact that many of the locals are used to your presence, you’d likely be getting a lot of stares. Well… you’re getting a lot of stares anyway, but you’d be getting more if you hadn’t been here for nearly two years.

You roll your shoulders as you stop in front of a particularly tall building. Granted, most of the buildings in Manehattan are tall, but this building is really tall. You take a moment to look up, having to crane your neck to do so. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that this is really where you work.

After taking a deep breath, you step inside. It’s a lot more comfortable inside than out, if only because there aren’t as many ponies in here. The sizable lobby is well-lit and quiet. The receptionist, a young mare that’s been working here for less time than you, is sound asleep behind her desk. You smile at her as you make your way to the far side of the room and press one of the arrow-shaped buttons on the wall.

After some time, the elevator doors slide open. A pair of younger stallions wordlessly step out as you get inside. Looking back into the lobby, you don’t see anypony coming to join you, so you press the button labeled “14” and lean against the wall as the doors close once more.

You feel yourself drifting off to sleep as you stand there, forcing you to shake your head in an effort to regain your composure. It’s been a long, long day.

After a few moments of quiet rumbling, the elevator comes to a stop and lets out a ding. With a sigh, you step out of the elevator and into the office space.

For the most part, the floor is dark. Almost everypony has gone home for the day, and as you walk by a number of doors leading to various offices, you can’t help but let out a yawn. You clocked out not too long ago, yourself.

However, despite your fatigue, you still have one more thing to do tonight. You have some very serious business to attend to.

And that business comes in the form of a particularly grumpy mare. Said mare’s office is at the very end of the hall, and from here you can see the warm light of a lamp shining beneath the door. A gentle, tired smile creeps its way to your face as you carefully knock on the door.

“Hmm? Who is still in at this hour?” You hear a distinct, familiar sigh before the voice speaks up again. “Come in.”

The smile not leaving your face, you turn the handle and let yourself into Harshwhinny’s office. It’s a fairly grand place, with the entire back wall consisting of a window looking out over the street below and the buildings across the way. Her desk is a semicircle, the fine, glossy finish on its oak-wood surface giving it an air of dignity… a dignity matched only by the mare sitting behind it.

Ms. Harshwhinny perfectly encapsulates the look of a professional. Her brilliant orange coat is glossy and smooth, the result of meticulous grooming. Her golden mane and tail are curled perfectly and well cared for. Her mulberry suit clings tightly to her chest, giving enough room for her to show off her trophy-shaped cutie mark. Her sharp blue eyes pierce you with a cold ferocity few can achieve.

All in all, she’s nothing short of beautiful.

“Good evening,” you say as you let yourself into her office. “I’d say I’m surprised to see you up this late, but I’d be lying.”

“Your cheek isn’t appreciated.” Those piercing blue eyes of hers look away from you, choosing instead to shift downwards at the stack of papers resting before her. “There’s still a lot to be done before our quarterly review.”

“Still working on that report for the Miller account?”

“Peh, the Miller account. I don’t think I’ll ever get that thing done.” You shift in place a little bit, and the sound of the rustling grocery bags in your hands catches her attention. “Why are you here, anyway?”

“I’m here to convince you to wrap up for the day.”

“No,” she sternly says without a hint of hesitation. “There is simply too much to get done.”

“Not so much that it’s worth sacrificing your health for, Ms. Harshwhinny.”

“I don’t believe that’s your call to make.”

“As your assistant, I’m pretty sure that’s exactly my call to make.”

“No, what you’re supposed to be doing is finishing up the audit forms for–”

“I’ve already done that.”

“Then you should–”

“Get the statement of work signed off on? That’s done too.”

“Ugh, then find something to do for crying out loud! Heck, go home if you’re so inclined. Just stop bothering me.”

“...” Despite her words, you feel your smile widen. “Oh, alright.” You turn around in an overexaggerated and cocky manner. “I guess I’ll have to eat all these sweet rolls myself.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you can see one of her ears flick to attention. No matter how professional these ponies try to be, that will never stop being cute.

“H-huh?” Her vocalized confusion is quiet, clearly not meant to be heard. Unfortunately for her, there aren’t a lot of other sounds to drown it out.

“Well, it’d be highly unprofessional to eat in the office. I’ll take you up on your offer and gorge myself at home, I suppose.”

You open the office door and act like you are about to leave. With the smile still lingering on your face, you silently count down in your head.

In three…

Two…

One…

“H-hold on.” You hear the sound of a chair moving and bit of shuffling before Ms. Harshwhinny trots up alongside you. “I-it’d be extremely unhealthy for you to eat all of those by yourself.”

“So, you are done for the night?”

“I suppose it’d be even less productive if I were to begin work exhausted tomorrow due to lack of sleep.”

“Haha! Alright, then.”

This isn’t the first time you’ve gone through this song and dance. You know that sweet rolls are her one weakness. It’s basically the only surefire way to get her to go home for the evening. It’s a secret you keep close to your chest, both for her sake, and for yours.

You know, because she’d kill you if you told anyone.

You make light conversation as you both saunter back over to the elevator, this time pressing the button labeled “30.” The elevator typically takes a lot longer than this, but this late at night, there aren’t a whole lot of ponies out and about.

When the elevator doors open once more, you are greeted to a small, square-shaped room. A single ornate door is on the far side of the room, and on the side of the door is a small, metallic keypad. Ms. Harshwhinny deftly punches in a long passcode, after which a small green light begins to glow on the keypad. This seemingly causes the door to unlock, and she glances back at you before stepping inside.

Nonchalantly following her in, you breathe a sigh of relief. This building doubles as both an office and an apartment complex, and the owner of the building’s penthouse is none other than Ms. Harshwhinny herself.

The apartment is, fittingly, extremely grand. Just like in her office, the back wall is made entirely of glass. Unlike her office, however, the window provides an incredible view of the Manehattan skyline thanks to this being the building’s highest floor.

Fancy hanging lights illuminate the apartment with warm light, a warmth supported by the wooden aesthetic. The whole space rings of modernity, but with a rustic touch. There are several expensive sofas near the center of the central room, and to the right of the entrance there is a fully stocked bar.

“I am going to take a bath,” Harshwhinny says as she trudges over to a door on the left wall. “Do not eat all of those sweet rolls without me.”

“You have my word,” you say innocently as you place your bags down on a nearby counter.

You were going to joke about joining her in there, but you figure it’s best to not push her tonight. Besides, after eating a bit, you’re going to be ready for bed yourself.

…Oh yeah, did you forget to mention that you live here too? Or that prior to hiring you as her assistant, you and Ms. Harshwhinny became a low-key couple?

Oh. Well. Both of those things are true.

You take some time to make yourself comfortable, changing out of your work clothes and into something lighter. After doing so, you get to work making dinner. It takes Harshwhinny some time to get done in the bathroom, both because ponies take a long time to dry and because she takes very good care of herself. Eventually, she emerges looking as pristine as ever.

She is, however, not wearing her suit, and she has taken off all of her jewelry. It’s a completely bare Harshwhinny, and while this sight isn’t uncommon for most ponies, she doesn’t go out in public like this. Ever. The fact that you’re able to be graced with the sight is a privilege you hold close to your heart.

Harshwhinny sniffs at the air as she makes her way to the kitchen.

“Actually cooking dinner tonight, hm?”

“Figured you needed it. You seemed stressed today.”

“And what else is new?” she grumbles as she takes a seat across from you.

You just smile at her as you slide her a plate. Despite her typical demeanor and current exhaustion, you see a faint grin form on her face.

The two of you eat in relative silence for quite some time. While Harshwhinny typically eats slowly, you can’t help but notice that she’s rushing a little bit. The reason why becomes clear when, having finished her dinner, she doesn’t hesitate to help herself to a sweet roll or two.

Or three.

Dang she’s cute when she does that.

You stretch a little bit as you stand from your seat, making sure to grab both of your plates after doing so. Harshwhinny leans back a little bit and fails to stifle a wholly undignified yawn.

“I suppose I should be off to bed, then.”

“I’m gonna clean up a bit first. I still haven’t gotten to wash up.”

“Hmhm. A filthy human like you always needs to wash up.”

Amused, she hops out of her seat and makes her way to the bedroom, her hoofsteps being the only sound in the sizable apartment. You smile as you watch her tail lazily sway back and forth before returning to the dishes.

After finishing your remaining duties for the night and taking a nice, hot shower, you follow Harshwhinny’s lead and enter the big, comfortable bedroom. This room, too, has a window for a wall, and the brilliant view combined with the massive luxury bed makes for an incomparably comfortable atmosphere.

Meanwhile, sprawled out on the bed (but noticeably not yet under the covers) is Harshwhinny, looking uncharacteristically soft and relaxed.

“Took you long enough,” she mumbles.

“You were waiting for me?” you ask as you saunter over to your side of the bed.

“...Tonight? Yes.”

You might be intimate with one another, but more often than not she passes out as soon as her head hits the pillow. Not that you’re complaining, of course.

“Hmhm. Well, I’m honored.”

With practiced ease, you slide into bed alongside her. The many layers of comfortable blankets envelop your body, but not before you gently grab Harshwhinny by the torso and pull her under with you. She doesn’t complain, and as you make yourself comfortable, she makes no effort to release herself from your grasp.

After a few moments, you wrap your arms around her comparably small form, pulling her in close against your chest. To your surprise, she snuggles in with you, rubbing her face against your neck as her hooves rest themselves on either side of you.

“You sure are affectionate tonight,” you whisper into the darkness.

“Just shut up and let me have this,” she retorts. Despite her words, her tone is about as relaxed as it’s ever been.

You smile as you reinforce your grip on her. Almost unthinkingly, you tilt your head down and give her a quick peck on the forehead. For a while, she doesn’t respond. However, after a few moments of comfortable silence, she slowly shifts away from your neck and forces you to look down towards her. Without saying a word, she presses her lips against yours.

Even in a relaxed state like this, her kiss is firm. Commanding. Methodical. It’s perfectly in line with how she operates, which is, in its own way, extremely cute. It’s even cuter when you start kissing back with a passionate fury, causing her to become very flustered very quickly.

When she finally pulls away, she has to take a moment to catch her breath.

“You can’t just let a good thing be, can you?”

“Not when it’s coming from you, no,” you say with a chuckle.

Even in the darkness, you can see her piercing eyes locking onto your own. She glares at you for a moment, but that glare melts away in favor of a subdued smile. Without a word, she closes her eyes and snuggles back in against your neck.

You lean back against your pillow, making sure that you’re both comfortable as you feel sleep beginning to approach you. She quietly mumbles something that you can’t quite make out, but before long, her deep breaths make it clear to you that she has fallen asleep first.

She may be your marefriend, but that doesn’t mean she shows her sensitive side very often, even behind closed doors. As a result, you tend to relish these close, quiet moments you get with her whenever you can.

Being with Harshwhinny is difficult. It’s stressful. It’s tiring.

It’s very serious business.

And yet, it’s your favorite thing in the world.