Coronation

Camelot, Old England. August 11, 3119

Blackjack looked at her body wrapped in Luna’s suit in the mirror and saw that she was wearing it well, giving her the elegant appearance of a true queen of Equestria; which did nothing to calm her nerves. In no more than twenty minutes, it would be the coronation: Sunny Starscout, also known as the Savior of Meridian, daughter of Argyle Starshine and Elisabet Sobeck, would receive the crown that would mark the beginning of her rule as the sole queen of Equestria, and the beginning of the retirement of the two alicorn mares who were once known as the Lightbringer and the Security. A ceremony like that demanded the highest formality from everyone in attendance, and especially from Littlepip and herself, as the crown she wore on her head reminded her, the crown that had once belonged to Queen Luna. She couldn’t make any mistakes.

But there was something else that bothered her, much more than the possibility of, for example, tripping and falling on her face or sneezing violently in the middle of the ceremony. A thought that had often crossed her mind centuries ago, when the Legate’s words were fresh in her mind. A thought that over time she ended up pushing to a far corner of her mind, as she was so good at doing, but that now had resurfaced, finding herself as she was before the beginning of something that until now she had only known through stories and books: a golden age, a peaceful age. The age that should have begun more than a thousand years ago, when Twilight Sparkle became the Bearer of Magic, if the course of events had gone in the right direction.

Someone knocked on the door. Blackjack sighed. She would have to swallow her worries and maintain her composure, after all she was still the queen. Then she would have time to sink into her thoughts.

“Come in.”

A thestral mare entered, dressed as one of her maids, and said to Blackjack in a timid voice:

“My queen, the time is approaching. The Lunar Guard awaits you in the plaza. They are asking about you.”

“I was just adjusting my suit. I’ll go right now” she said, looking in the mirror again in case she found any flaw.

“Do you need help?”

“No, I’m done” Blackjack insisted. Her servants had already offered to help her put on the suit, but she had insisted on putting it on herself. “Tell the carriage drivers not to wait for me; I will fly alone.”

“Are you sure? The queens of Equestria always traveled in a carriage, accompanied by their personal guard. People wait to see it.”

“I have already said that I am not Queen Luna!” Blackjack replied, more sullenly than she intended, now looking her in the eyes.

“Oh, of course. Sorry, my queen. I’ll go and tell the drivers” she said and left the room, head down.

Blackjack sighed again. She should have been nicer to her. Mortals still addressed her as “Queen Luna.” Even her guards, whom she had asked on several occasions to call her “Queen Blackjack” or simply “Blackjack”, tended to be careless and treat her like the late goddess of the night. Perhaps, she thought, they believed that an implicit protocol required such treatment, given that Blackjack wore Luna’s crown, or perhaps they consciously or unconsciously believed that she was the reincarnation of Luna herself, as she was of Nyx, and Celestia of Hemera; Sometimes she herself wondered if she really was. Over time, Blackjack had given up and allowed everyone to call her whatever they wanted. But tonight she just wasn’t in the mood.

She shook her head and took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. Fluffing her wings, she left the room towards the balcony, from where she could see the palace, now practically finished, and the first blocks of a future city. Rebuilding the palace ruins had taken decades, and it would surely be more than a century before the city of Camelot returned to its original size. Removing the debris from the mountain had taken time, and even more so to clean up all the pink cloud and reinforce the foundation. When she learned that the old capital was going to be rebuilt, she thought that, even if the venture was successful, no one would want to live there again; a place with such a tragic history must be cursed or something, people would be scared. Apparently she had been wrong, and she was grateful for it. It was truly inspiring to see the ancient capital of Equestria not only being restored, but inhabited and flourishing.

Which only revived that thought she was trying to push away.

She shook her head again, irritated, and flew away. For a moment she wanted to fly at supersonic speed, but she didn’t want to destroy that suit that had cost her so much to put on. She glided between the tall towers and over the few streets below, allowing herself to admire the great work of the bricklayers and architects, which imitated the exquisite combination of diverse styles that the original city had accumulated over the centuries. She left the palace behind, descending slowly in the direction of the main square, at the foot of the long stone stairs (almost half a kilometer from end to end) that ended their climb in front of the palace entrance. A squad of thestrals was waiting for her in the square. It seemed pretty absurd to her that she could just fly from the palace to the square and then have to walk up all the damn stairs just for the ceremony; but, if all went well, tonight would be the last time she would have to do anything like that.

The square was an enormous circular area, almost three times as large as the old Saint Peter’s Square. There were hardly any buildings surrounding the square, the few that were in the early stages of construction, so that from the square you could see both sides of the mountainside perfectly and, below, the wide plains and hills of southern England. In the center of the plaza, stood the statue of the Savior of Meridian.

As she got closer, she could hear cheers coming from below, directed specifically at her. She shuddered. There were thousands of people there, spread between the plaza and the long dirt road that ascended from the plains below to the mountain. And not only ponies of the three races, but also zebras from Zebrica, griffins from Grifonia, dog anthrocanids from Caninia, qilins and xiezhis from China and Ta Lo, baaghodas from India, changelings from the Hive, dragons from New Valyria, and even khajiits from Tamriel and Abyssinia and leopard anthrophelids from Avalar and Wakanda, among other species. She wondered how many of those present, other than the thestrals, had come just to see her specifically; The inhabitants of the Lunar Commonwealth had developed a somewhat excessive devotion to the figure of Luna, as well as those of the New Camelot Republic to that of Celestia. Whatever the answer, if she made a fool of herself, they would all see it. All the more reason to calm down.

She landed near the bottom of the stairs, where a wide area reserved for people of special importance had been cleared, a belt of guards keeping the rest of the crowd several meters from the stairs. Twenty Lunar Guard thestrals were there waiting for her, standing at attention in the center of the foot of the stairs, right next to twenty other ponies of Littlepip’s Solar Guard, without Littlepip. Outside the area, the crowd became agitated and began to cheer and shout Luna’s name more intensely; The guards had to restrain them from running and throwing themselves at her. Blackjack gave them a shy greeting, shaking her hoof and putting on a crooked smile. She immediately thought that she should have bowed instead or done something a little more formal, but it was too late already.

With her back to the stairs, she looked away from the crowd. She saw that on either side of the Lunar and Solar Guard were numerous members of different rulers’ own personal guard, who had gathered in different groups spread throughout the area, talking to each other. To her left, at the edge of the bottom of the stairs, was Empress Flurry Heart of the Crystal Empire, accompanied by members of the Crystal Guard. Blackjack and Flurry greeted each other respectfully, but Flurry showed no signs of wanting to start a conversation, so they immediately returned to their waiting place. Blackjack had drawn Flurry into the recent battle against the Witness, and many crystal ponies had died. Blackjack thought that Flurry probably resented her somewhat for that fact, even though the decision to enter the conflict had been made of her own free will. But probably, in time, they could repair bonds.

Not much further, next to Littlepip’s Solar Guard on her right, she saw King Avad of Meridian, and much further away, Queen Mara Sov of the Reef, from whom she tried to hide; The devotion she professed to her made her uncomfortable. The one she was looking to greet now was Queen Piper Petals of Zephyr Heights, and especially her blood sister, the light guardian Zephyrina Storm. She jogged at a brisk pace to quickly meet Piper and Zephyrina, without Mara seeing her. The two sisters stopped talking when they saw her.

“Hi, girls!”

“Blackjack, you’re here! What a joy to see you!” Piper said, skipping all formality and giving Blackjack a love bear hug. Blackjack liked Piper to call her by her name. That she gave her loving bear hugs, not so much.

“A pleasure to have your presence” said Yuri, the ghost of Zephyrina Storm, disengaging from his slot in the mare’s chest.

“And at the scheduled time. That’s unusual” Zephyrina said, greeting Blackjack with a more restrained hug once Piper released her.

“I couldn’t miss it. Sunny made Littlepip and me promise to be by her side at the coronation. I just hope I don’t embarrass her in public.

“Strange, she said she hopes she doesn’t embarrass you and Littlepip” Piper said with a giggle.

“She embarrassing Pip? No way; That’s what I’m here for” Blackjack said, before turning around to look at the members of the Solar Guard. They were alone. “By the way, where is the titchy?”

“It’s here” Zephyrina said, pointing at Piper, who glared at her.

“Not Pipp, Pip” Blackjack said, rolling her eyes.

“Aaah, that titchy” said Zephyrina, pretending to understand her well just now. “I think she’s still in her room. She’s probably busy trying to find a smol size Celestia suit.” She suppressed a laugh. “Don’t tell her I said that.”

“The girl is young. She’s not even a thousand years old. She will grow” Blackjack said. The mention of Littlepip’s age and the fact that that might not be even a fraction of how many years she and Blackjack would live brought that unpleasant thought back to her, so she continued talking: “I’ve had a hard time putting on the suit. I have done well? I hope it doesn’t look too pompous.

“Don’t worry, you’ve done well. And it’s beautiful. Worthy of the goddess of the night” said Piper.

“Yeah, it suits you perfectly” said Zephyrina.

“The suit itself is very nice, but it’s tight around the waist” Yuri said, scanning the alicorn with his blue laser.

“Tight at the waist?” Blackjack said, blinking.

“That’s right” Yuri said, oblivious to Piper and Zephyrina’s gaze.

“You mean the suit is too small for my waist?” Blackjack said, blinking more intensely.

“Hmm…, it’s a matter of perspective, but I would say that your waist is too big for the suit.

Blackjack’s ears lowered, her face wilting.

“So you mean I’m fat?”

“No, he doesn’t mean that!” Zephyrina was quick to say. “You don’t mean that, do you?”

“Well…” Yuri said, still not fully aware of what he had said and to whom.

“Yuri” Zephyrina threatened.

“Please, tell me I’m not fat” Blackjack said, with a very sad tone.

“You’re not fat” Yuri said in a perfectly neutral tone.

Blackjack narrowed her eyes, slowly approaching Yuri, who began to look a little nervous, as did the two pegasus sisters. Blackjack continued advancing like a panther until her face was in front of Yuri, who stood as stiff as a stone. Then Blackjack lunged and tried to eat Yuri in one bite, but he darted away and took refuge behind Zephyrina.

“She tried to eat me!”

Blackjack laughed, and the sisters relaxed and started laughing too, with Yuri still behind Zephyrina.

“Okay, I admit I got a little carried away with the drink” Blackjack said, patting her beer gut.

And it was true, because after the last victory against the Darkness, Blackjack had spent several days celebrating it as she usually celebrated everything, drinking, and the alcohol had swollen her belly a little, something commendable, considering the powerful metabolism of alicorns. She liked alcohol; and not just to give herself pleasure. In the past, it had already helped her on several occasions to face pain, whether it came in the form of anger or sadness. And right now it couldn’t hurt a little to… to celebrate. True, this ceremony was important and she didn’t want to show herself or Sunny up, but a drink or two wouldn’t hurt.

“Well, they say that to lose weight you have to drink a lot of fluids, right?”

“Yes, but…” Zephyrina began to say.

“Perfect” Blackjack interrupted, and motioned to one of her lunar guards, who came flying towards her.

“My queen?”

“Do me a favor: go to that restaurant over there” she pointed to the place, a luxury restaurant, on one of the edges of the square “and bring me one of those drinks that I like so much.”

“Moonlight?”

“Exactly.”

The guard nodded without questioning anything and trotted at a fast pace towards the restaurant. The place probably wouldn’t open until the ceremony was over, but its owner wouldn’t prevent a guard sent by the queen herself from entering. Piper and Zephyrina looked at each other and then at Blackjack, frowning.

“Are you sure this is a good time to drink?” Piper said.

“Well, of course! It is not every day that the new queen of Equestria is crowned. Isn’t it an excellent occasion?”

“I agree, but I think it would be better to postpone it until the party after the coronation” said Zephyrina, raising an eyebrow.

“Don’t worry, I have a lot of stamina. I will control myself.”

“You better” Piper said. “If you start vomiting or singing during the coronation, I will force you to taste my entire tea collection. I’ll tell Stronghoof to tie you up if necessary.”

Stronghoof… The mention of the burly paladin of the Steel Rangers brought back Blackjack memories of another alicorn: the person who for centuries was the paladin’s partner, and a very good friend of Blackjack. Another loved one that time had taken from her, just as it had already taken P-21, Glory, Rampage and Scotch Tape. Just as it had already taken away almost all the friends she had made since the victory at Hoofington.

“Blackjack?”

“Huh?” The mare blinked, clearing her mind. Apparently, she had been left in limbo for a few moments. “Oh, sorry, I was just thinking about how much Stronghoof has changed since I met him so long ago. Before, he was so… Stronghoof.”

“And isn’t he now?” Piper asked.

“But before much more. He has calmed down quite a bit. I would say it is a change for the better. Others, however, become more and more crazy over time” she said, thinking of a certain spirit of chaos; another old friend.

“How not to? Look at everything that has happened to the world in recent times. There is no time to catch up” said Zephyrina.

“True. When you and Littlepip went out into the world, in just three months you completely changed the course of history. Now that you are back, it is normal that there are so many changes again” Piper added.

The memories of those terrible three months had long since stopped causing her to panic or cry. Even so, they were still unpleasant memories that she preferred to avoid. There was no longer any reason to return to them; she had learned everything there was to learn. Blackjack nodded her head without further ado.

The lunar guard Blackjack had sent a moment ago to fetch Moonlight reappeared at her side with the drink.

“Thank you, sweetie” said Blackjack, picking up the elegant bottle with her telekinesis. The lunar guard returned with the rest of their squad.

Removing the stopper and allowing herself to smell the contents, like a qilin sniffing their tea, Blackjack began to drink, in front of the sisters, who seemed somewhat uneasy. At the tenth nip, Blackjack stopped drinking and sighed with pleasure. She offered the bottle to Piper, who politely declined. Then to Zephyrina, who considered trying a nip, but refused when she saw the look Piper was giving her. Finally she offered it to Yuri, who hid behind Zephyrina again. Blackjack shrugged and took a few more gulps.

A thestral mare approached the group. It was Queen Mara Sov, who had seen Blackjack, who immediately put the bottle inside her suit.

“Queen Luna. It is an honor to have you here” Mara said to Blackjack with a deep bow. “Queen Piper, Zephyrina” she said to these, with a much lighter bow. Blackjack knew that there had been tensions between the sisters and the Reef Queen in the past, but now they were firm allies, at least in theory.

The three mares returned Mara’s greeting, and she continued, addressing Blackjack:

“I just wanted to come and apologize.” Blackjack frowned. “I know that at first I didn’t treat you with the respect you deserved. I hope you understand me, the official story said that the Security died more than eight centuries ago, and suddenly you appeared, and Sunny said that you had been alive all this time. It wasn’t easy to believe, but now we all know that you are her, Queen Luna.”

Blackjack had already tried to convince the Reef thestrals that she was not Queen Luna. Like most people, after seeing her draw magic from the moon itself, appear in dreams, and other feats impossible for anyone but Nyx’s avatar, they refused to believe she wasn’t. So Blackjack humored her and said:

“It would have been reckless to believe such a story without thinking twice. I understand you. It’s already water under the bridge.”

“I am greatly relieved to know that” she said with a sincere smile. “I also wanted to give you one thing” Mara put her hoof in a pocket of her own suit and pulled out a silver pocket mirror: “My loyalty.”

“You have already sworn loyalty to me, and you have shown it.”

“But then you had just gotten your crown back. Now that you are going to hand it over to Sunny, I want you to know that, whatever position you occupy in this kingdom, whether at Court or among the common people, you can count on my protection.” She pointed to the mirror, which was closed. “If you ever find yourself in trouble, activate that mirror with your magic and call me. The Night’s Watch is loyal to Luna, not her crown. Give a signal and, wherever you are, we will come to serve you.”

Blackjack picked up the mirror slowly, examining it. She put it in a pocket of her suit and said:

“It is an honor that you offer me your sword…, but, no offense intended, I think it is in vain. We have defeated the Witness. There are no enemies left to be reckoned with.” She smiled slightly, trying to sound reassuring. “Maybe it’s time to sheath the sword and focus solely on building.”

Mara Sov frowned a little, confused.

“Queen Luna, I wouldn’t want to be a doomsayer, but I’m sure you know as well as I do that it’s not possible for us to do that.” Blackjack stopped smiling. “You have lived more than eight centuries, not counting those you lived before your second return. Seen with your own eyes the death of the Soul Eater and the Day of Sunshine and Rainbows. Who would have thought that, four hundred years later, we would be attacked by the eliksni, or that, almost eight hundred years later, another secret project would threaten the entire world?” Blackjack looked away. Mara shook her head. “No, it is not the time to sheathe the sword. Helis, the Red Legion and the Witness are just more names on an infinite list. There will be new enemies that threaten our nations, that is certain, and in order to defeat them, we have to be united. If Equestria were attacked again, would you stay out of it?

“Of course not” Blackjack responded immediately.

“Me neither, and that’s why I want you to know that, when the time comes to fight again, you can count on the Reef.”

Blackjack blinked, processing everything she had just heard. It was incredible to her the extent of the loyalty that Mara and her kingdom gave to her. She also felt somewhat guilty, she probably didn’t deserve so much devotion and respect, but she pushed that feeling away, as she had learned to do a long time ago; Having low self-esteem was unbecoming of a monarch. She soon composed herself and responded firmly:

“And the Reef can count on the goddess of the night.”

Mara Sov nodded, very pleased. There was an awkward silence, and Blackjack looked a little upset, so Piper intervened:

“Sunny will be here soon. I think Blackjack should be waiting with her guard to receive her.”

“It’s true” said Mara. She headed to Blackjack. “I’m sorry for bothering you, but it was important for you to know this. We’ll see after the coronation.”

“See you” Blackjack said, and they both bowed goodbye.

Blackjack said goodbye to Piper and Zephyrina and trotted slowly towards where her guards were stationed. Once there, she sat down on the hard floor. A palace page quickly approached her with a blue cushion and offered it to her as a seat. Blackjack thanked them and sat down on the cushion.

She sighed. She knew very well that everything Mara Sov had said was completely true, despite her reassuring comment to her, but hearing it said by someone else somehow made it truer. She was never under any illusion that victory over Red Eye, the Enclave, Cognitum, and the Eater would bring perpetual peace, that Hoofington’s would be the last war. In every century of the last eight hundred years, without exception, she had seen Equestria suffer at the hands of unexpected enemies, both from without and from within; why would the next centuries be different? True, they now had Sunny, a strong and benevolent goddess who would protect their kingdom and pursue peace, but Celestia had done that too, and in none of the fifteen centuries she ruled was the world or Equestria itself free of war. There would always be enemies willing to break Equestria for one reason or another, from without or from within. In fact, perhaps she already knew the name of their next enemy. What about that entity called Nemesis, whose existence Sunny and her friends had discovered on Far Zenith during the assault on the facilities? It sounded like a serious threat. Maybe serious enough to threaten Sunny’s life and the future of Equestria.

Blackjack took the bottle out of her dress and drank again. She needed to clear her mind. She directed her gaze to the statue in the center of the square. Sunny Starscout, the Savior of Meridian. The statue had been moved from the city, in the arid south of Old Spain, to here, Camelot, the true capital of Equestria, for tonight Sunny would become, in effect, the new queen of Equestria. The immortal Sunny Starscout, who would protect harmony in the world forever and ever. If Blackjack remembered correctly, before the destruction of Camelot, in the center of the square there had stood a statue of the immortal Celestia, the Lightbringer, who would protect harmony on earth forever and ever. Where was the immortal Celestia now? She no longer even knew what had become of her bones. Time had taken Celestia, as well as her sister, and Sunny Starscout would be no exception, nor would Zephyrina and her sister, and Stronghoof, and…

… And Littlepip. And then…

It seemed that no matter how hard she tried, that hurtful thought kept coming back to her mind again and again, if not because of someone else, then because of herself. She drank Moonlight again. There was no point in being sad on a night like this.

“When you start drinking, you are either very happy, or you are very sad.”

Blackjack turned towards the source of the voice. To her right was an anthrocanid dog with a prosthetic arm.

“Boss” Blackjack said, smiling.

“Security” Rover Snake said, returning the gesture. “I’ve seen you talk to the queen of the Reef. Has she been nagging you?”

Blackjack gave a small laugh. She was starting to feel a little dizzy. She said:

“No, in fact she has been very kind, of which I understand she is almost incapable.”

“Almost” Rover said bitterly.

“But she still calls me Luna! Almost everyone calls me Luna, but she has already spoken to me on several occasions. She should know by now that I’m not Luna, even though I have her powers and dress like her and wear her crown and... drink Moonlight.” Rover raised an eyebrow. “It doesn’t matter, it’s clear that I’m not Luna!”

“It’s not so clear. Luna’s soul was inside you for a while, right? Maybe she left a part of herself in you, or maybe her soul has returned to you and you haven’t realized it, or maybe the soul that returned to Blackjack’s clone was Luna’s, and all this time you thought you were Blackjack when in reality you are the goddess of the night reincarnated in Blackjack’s clone” he finished saying, staring at her with wide eyes.

“… What? Don’t scare me!” Blackjack said, her eyes just as wide.

“Or maybe Queen Mara is afraid and believing that Luna is among us again makes her feel safer. God knows. Is that why you’re upset, because you feel like you’re pretending to be someone you’re not?”

Blackjack frowned.

“I’m not upset” she said, looking away and drinking more.

Rover smiled mischievously.

“You ponies make faces. It is easy for us dogs to read them. Yours says you are… ” he looked at her carefully. He stopped smiling “… sad.”

“I’m not sad” Blackjack insisted. “It’s just that it’s a very important night and I’m nervous.”

“Is that why you drink?”

“Exactly. I want to be calm for when Sunny arrives. When I’m nervous, I do dumb things.”

“You must be very nervous, then. You’ve already drunk almost half the bottle.”

Blackjack looked at the bottle and for a moment felt a pang of fear. What if she ended up getting drunk? If Blackjack had been thinking clearly, she would have put the bottle down right away, but that wasn’t the case, so she took another swig.

“Alicorns have a fast metabolism. I need to drink a lot more than the average pony for the alcohol to take effect.” That was true, but it was also true that Moonlight was much more potent than average alcohol.

“Of course” Rover said, unconvinced.

For a while they both stood there in silence, looking at the stars in the sky. Rover occasionally turned her head and watched Blackjack, who was slowly finishing the bottle. Normally, had seen Rover, when Blackjack got drunk, she became silly, lively and party-goer, but now, with each drink, Blackjack seemed more and more lethargic, and her face more sad. Rover looked ahead for a long moment, seeming to think carefully about something. Then he looked at his prosthetic arm and said:

“I have some experience with phantom pain. I can assure you this: it never goes away. You can’t run away from it either. Any attempt to fight it or endure it ends badly for you. The only thing you can do to alleviate it is to know it and accept it as part of your person.” Rover looked at Blackjack, who looked back at him, her eyes slightly unfocused. “Talking to a friend can help you do this. I’m not good at talking about feelings, but your new friends seem to understand the magic of friendship.”

“Friends… I once had friends…” Blackjack muttered.

Rover nodded, silently. He then patted Blackjack on the shoulder and walked away from her. Blackjack didn’t even look at him. Instead, after a while she looked to her right, looking for Littlepip in front of the Solar Guard. She hadn’t arrived yet. She sighed; she could use her company right now. She looked up at the stars again. Like so many times before, she wondered if the souls of her friends were there, watching her. Or maybe they weren’t watching her because they were too far away from her. Or perhaps their souls had been reincarnated. Or perhaps, after some time, the soul faded away forever.

She could, and she knew this because she had already done it, spend hours thinking about it and not come to any conclusion beyond what she already knew: that she was alive, and they were not. There was no point dwelling on the matter, so she took another swig from the bottle. What else could she do? She continued drinking. Her vision was already quite blurry, but she kept swallowing, and finally the bottle was empty. She left it clumsily on the ground. Her head was spinning and she could barely see straight, but she managed to get up and half-jog, half-crawl to where she thought one of her guards was to ask them to bring her more Moonlight, but someone grabbed her shoulder and said:

“Come.”

Blackjack managed to make out Zephyrina’s voice. She looked at her face, but it was out of focus. Zephyrina took her arm, put it over her back to offer support to Blackjack, and began to lead her to the left, towards the edge of the square, away from the crowd. One of the lunar guards approached them.

“My queen?” they asked, worried.

“Dismissed. I need to get some air” Blackjack said, slurring her words.

The guard nodded, somewhat unsure, and returned to their position. The two mares (Yuri was not with them) continued walking until they left the square behind, entering between the few buildings that were under construction there, hiding Zephyrina and Blackjack from everyone’s sight. Zephyrina stopped and began to remove the suit from Blackjack, who did not resist, leaving it folded on a wooden box along with the crown, before continuing walking.

The buildings were also left behind. Their hooves left the stone path and trotted over the earthy surface of the mountain itself, sloping and covered with grass and some remains of stone blocks from the ancient city. Blackjack looked for a moment like she was going to slip and Zephyrina made sure she was firmly supported, placing herself between Blackjack and the downward direction of the mountainside. They continued walking at a slow pace, Blackjack meekly letting herself be carried away, until they found a flat stone platform that had been left from the remains of an ancient city building, hidden from the view of everyone in the square by one of the slopes of the mountain, stopping and sitting down. Between the hard dizziness and the poor light, of which only source was the stars and the waning moon, Blackjack was unable to see Zephyrina take out a small bottle filled with some liquid and put it in her mouth, taking her off guard.

“Drink, it will do you good” Zephyrina said to Blackjack’s brief resistance.

Blackjack obeyed and slowly drank the contents of the flask, which at least was good, to Blackjack’s tastes. Soon, she began to feel a tingling sensation that spread from her stomach to the rest of her body, especially her head. The dizziness and bloated feeling began to leave her mind, and in no more than two minutes Blackjack already felt clear. Now that she could focus her eyes, she looked at Zephyrina’s face, who was watching her carefully, and she said:

“Better?”

Blackjack rubbed her forehead and eyes briefly before answering.

“Better… Did Rover ask you to take care of me?”

“Yeah.” Zephyrina frowned. “I think we’re all used to your eccentricities by now, but getting drunk at a time like this is very irresponsible of you.”

“I know. I’m sorry” Blackjack said, looking down. “It’s just that I’m very nervous. I’m not Luna, I’m not used to this type of events.

“It’s not because of that. Rover also told me that you need to talk about something. Tell me, what’s happening?”

For a moment, Blackjack wanted to insist that she was just nervous and that Rover worried too much, but she had learned a long time ago that keeping these kind of feelings to herself only ended up hurting her more, as she had just confirmed tonight. So she took a deep breath and put her hoof on the back of her neck, trying to calm herself and think how to express herself, before saying:

“You died in the 21st century, before the Apocalypse, right?”

Zephyrina seemed confused by the question, but answered.

“That’s right. When my name was Katerina, I was a VKS pilot. I died on a mission, and one day, seven hundred years later, surprise, the Lord of Light resurrected me and I found a new life as a light guardian in the Zephyr Heights. Because if life takes many turns, so does death, it seems” she said with a crooked smile.

Blackjack nodded; she already knew this.

“And there, in Old Russia, did you have a family?”

“Yeah. A husband and three children; my bear and our three bear cubs. And a husky, too” Zephyrina said, smiling wider at the memory.

“Do you miss them?” Blackjack asked carefully, trying not to be impertinent.

Zephyrina stopped smiling, lowering her ears slightly.

“Yes… Yes, I miss them. This is how it will be until my last death.”

“And… how do you stand it?”

“Their absence?” Blackjack nodded again. “Simple: I now have a new family; Piper is my sister, and Sunny, Hitch, and the rest of the group are some of the best people I’ve ever met. I won’t say that the family I have now replaces the previous one, but I do value it almost or as much as that one.

“But… you are immortal.”

“I am” Zephyrina said, confused.

“And, except for Sunny, Piper, and the rest of the light guardians, none of those people are.”

“That’s right” Zephyrina said, beginning to see where this was going.

“You will see them die. Maybe even Sunny, and Piper” Blackjack finished, her voice shaking a little.

“Yes, it is totally possible.” Zephyrina bowed her head. “Is that what upsets you, knowing that you will see all your loved ones die?”

“You could say so” Blackjack muttered.

“Blackjack, death is a completely natural thing.” She tried to put on a comforting smile. “We have to accept that nothing survives time. Nothing is eternal. But that doesn’t mean it loses value. In fact, everything we love most in the world would not be half as precious to us if it lasted forever.”

“That’s the problem, that time destroys everything we value most” Blackjack said, her face wilting. She looked away from Zephyrina, towards Camelot. “We may be near the beginning of a new golden age, and that’s great. But it won’t last. If Nemesis doesn’t destroy Equestria, someone else will, maybe ourselves, and everything Sunny built will be lost.” Blackjack started jogging back and forth. “Just as no war lasts forever, neither does peace. Over time, the values that make the kingdom great now will be lost. Over time, unsuspected events will break the harmony that keeps us together. Over time, sides will emerge that will turn weapons against each other, massacring the unfortunates who find themselves in the middle. In time…” Blackjack looked directly at the perplexed Zephyrina, her face contorted “… a new Wasteland will appear. Zipp, I…” her voice broke “… I don’t know if I can bear another Wasteland.”

Zephyrina approached her to put a hoof on her shoulder.

“And it’s not just because of me. I can’t stand the idea of one day getting to see people I love know its horrors” she said between light sobs. “I have met so many good people, throughout these centuries. Littlepip, you, Sunny, and the rest of your friends are like family to me. I don’t want to see you die, but above all I don’t want to see you suffer. You don’t deserve it, and I know there are many people who don’t deserve it either. I don’t want Equestria to flourish and cities and species to spread across the world only for it all to end in Valyrian fire bombs again. Why build a world of which destiny is fire and blood?” She gritted her teeth. “Sometimes I think it would be better if life didn’t exist. That way no one would have to suffer.”

Zephyrina moved her hoof away and stared into Blackjack’s face with wide eyes, as if she had seen a ghost. Then her gaze turned hard.

“I’m going to ask you some questions, and I hope you answer honestly.” Blackjack nodded, a little nervously. “Is it true that Glory and P-21 loved you and wanted the best for you?”

“Yes.”

“And is it true that you loved them and wanted the best for them?”

“Yes” she answered more firmly.

“So, tell me, if you traveled back in time and had the chance to prevent their birth, thus sparing them the many hardships you know they will suffer, would you take it? Would you eliminate them from existence?”

“No, I would never do that!” Blackjack said immediately.

And Zephyrina asked, very emphatically:

“Why?”

Blackjack was silent for a while, stunned. She had to think carefully about the question. She didn’t think highly of herself, but she knew that they thought highly of her. She knew that they had loved her to the point of being willing to give their lives for her, and Blackjack had loved them just as much, so she knew that feeling very well. Glory and P-21 had made her life a much brighter path. They had meant the world to her.

The hardships she herself had gone through were terrible, but if she somehow went back in time to the moment of her conception and was given the option to choose between being born and not being born, what would she choose? It didn’t take long to find the answer: being born. Because not being born would have meant depriving herself of the blessing of knowing such wonderful people as Glory, P-21, Lacunae, Boo and the rest of the gang, and the many good people she had met over the centuries. And, why not say it?, of enjoying the many small pleasures that life had, such as cards, movies, music, reading, the sky and the sea... She remembered perfectly the most horrible moments she had experienced, and the suffering they had caused her had left her with great scars that were still there today and would surely never disappear, but no matter how much the idea of going through them again terrified her, she would not sacrifice all the happy moments she had lived with Glory, P-21 and anyone else or alone just to never suffer again. Because she was very lucky to have found her light in the darkness. Glory and P-21 had found theirs too. And if finding this light made Blackjack’s life worth living, the same could be said for Glory and P-21. She then knew what to answer:

“Because then they would never have had the opportunity of meeting me and the rest of our friends. Because although life is too cruel for many to be worth living, many others manage to find in it infinite sources of joy and fulfillment. Because, as painful as Glory and P-21's lives were, the moments of happiness weighed the most on them.” And she ended, with a small smile: “And, comparably, the worth of Sunny’s reign will not depend on how long it lasts or how it ends, but on how many opportunities for a harmonious life she manages to bless her subjects.”

Zephyrina smiled, satisfied, but Blackjack frowned and continued:

“Although... how do we know that we are right? Can we decide for everyone that life is worth living?” She hurriedly continued under Zephyrina’s strange gaze. “Uh, it’s not that I’m considering whether we should wipe out life on the planet or not, but with so many people not lucky enough to be able to say that life is worth living, I wonder if, in universal terms, the Darkness surpasses the Light.”

Zephyrina didn’t need to think long before she took a breath and responded:

“Many will say that the Light surpasses the Darkness, many that the Darkness surpasses the Light, and both will have good reasons to think so, but, as of today, there is no definitive answer to that question. Most likely there won't be until time runs out. I want to think that this is why people like you and me are here, to make the Light overcome the Darkness.

Blackjack smiled, nodding her head.

“It is a comforting thought, that our immortality is not an accidental condition, but that it has such a noble reason for being. It’s easier to bear it this way.”

Zephyrina smiled.

“The blessing of us immortals is that we can have many families. My husband and my children were taken away by the bombs, and that will always hurt me, but I am still open to trying to have a partner and children again in the future and have a good life with them, as long as they live. And I am open to having new friends and spending good times with them, despite the pain of seeing old ones go. And, who knows? You may one day have children again, if you’re willing, of course; For that, you have all the time in the world.”

The mere idea left Blackjack speechless. Blackjack highly doubted that she would ever want to have children again, but she had to admit that the possibility had long since ceased to be entirely ruled out. Furthermore, if her judgment of Sunny was correct, her reign would be prosperous and create a harmonious world, a world suitable for raising children.

“And if the Wasteland ever returns” Zephyrina continued, looking Blackjack in the eyes, “we will defeat it, together. Those of us who serve the Light, an ideal as universal as harmony, always find allies.” She walked up to Blackjack and gave her a hug. “You are not alone. We have each other.”

Blackjack hugged her back and took a deep breath, wiping away a tear that had started to escape and feeling much better. Yes, with people like Zephyrina by her side, she could face the future, whatever it might be.

Then she looked up at the stars and said:

“Still, the big question remains: what happens after death? Do we reunite with lost loved ones, reincarnate, fade away, or something else?”

“We will know like everyone else, when our time comes. Even immortals die. Until then, let’s party.”

Blackjack gave a small laugh. The two mares separated, smiling.

“Thank you for talking to me, Zephyrina.”

“That’s what friends are for.” Zephyrina turned around and looked in the direction of Camelot. “Come on, let’s go back. Sunny won’t be long in coming.”

And they trotted along the side of the mountain back to the plaza, this time at a much lighter pace, mainly because Blackjack was no longer wobbling on her hooves, but also because she was feeling much more cheerful. She was still saddened by the memory of her friends and the knowledge that she would probably see both her future friends and the world they had built die before her own eyes, but now she accepted these facts with a smile, not of resignation, but of determination. Zephyrina noticed her friend’s mood and was infected.

They came to the unfinished buildings that surrounded the palace side of the square. Zephyrina made sure Blackjack picked up her suit before reappearing in public and helped her put it on after both of them cleaned off the dirt that had stuck to the fur on their legs. Trotting back across the square, Blackjack saw a certain smol-sized gray alicorn wearingCelestia’s suit, sword, and crown. She quickened her pace.

“Blackjack, baby!” said Littlepip when she saw her.

“Heya, Pip!” Blackjack said, reaching out to Littlepip and sharing a kiss and a hug with her. A very long hug.

“Blackjack?”

“Wait. I like to hug you.”

Littlepip didn’t complain. They stayed like that for a whole minute, each enjoying the other’s contact, smiling, until finally separating.

“I thought you would be here by now” said Littlepip. “I was quite late putting on the suit. It was too big for me.”

“I was already here, but I had to go pee.” Littlepip put on an expressionless look. “I also had problems with the suit. It didn’t want to get in. That bad bug, Yuri, told me it was because I’m fat. I’m not fat, right?”

Littlepip responded with three seconds of silence that spoke volumes before blurting out:

“Maybe we should exchange suits.”

Blackjack narrowed her eyes .

“No. Blue matches my white fur better” she said, looking away, in the opposite direction of the palace.

“My suit is white…”

“My suit fits me perfectly” Blackjack insisted.

Littlepip was silent, shrinking a little. Blackjack sighed, stood next to her and hugged her with her wing before saying:

“But I feel much more comfortable going natural. Tonight, before we go to bed, I could use some help taking it off, and if you’d do me the favor, I could take yours off. And tuck you in, while you tuck me in.” She raised her eyebrows twice.

Littlepip turned beet red, avoiding eye contact. Blackjack would never tire of doing that to her. Plus, she knew Littlepip enjoyed it as much as she did.

“Hey, look” said Littlepip, pointing to the sky.

Blackjack followed the direction of her hoof and saw a rectangular flying object with metal wings approaching, flanked by several pegasus guards. Blackjack recognized the vehicle: the Sky Bandit. She remembered how surprised and nostalgic Littlepip had been when Sunny presented it to her, repaired and modernized. She wondered what the sky bus was doing there and why so many guards were protecting it. The Sky Bandit landed on the plaza, in the center of the cleared space, immediately followed by the guards. The front door opened, and out stepped Sunny Starscout, followed by Hitch, Isabella, and Misty (or was she called Beta now? Blackjack wasn’t sure). The crowd applauded and cheered loudly at the arrival of the orange alicorn and the rest of the Element Bearers.

Blackjack raised an eyebrow. It was already strange that Sunny showed up on the Sky Bandit instead of being carried by a royal carriage or one of the Last City’s airships; That she also appeared naked, without any adornment beyond her ponytail and the Element of Magic on her chest, was knowingly violating protocol. Her companions were not better dressed. From Littlepip’s confused face, she thought the same thing too. But Piper and Zephyrina, not very far from the pair of alicorns, kept their smiles, which meant they probably expected this. Blackjack thought that perhaps Sunny had chosen to introduce herself this way as a gesture of humility, a way of saying “I’m not the queen yet” or “I’m just like all of you.” In any case, neither Blackjack nor Littlepip were going to blame her.

Sunny bowed to both mares and greeted:

“Queen Littlepip. Queen Blackjack. It is an honor.”

“The honor is mine” said Blackjack.

“And mine” said Littlepip. She looked at Sunny’s forehead. “The horn suits you very well.”

“And the wings even better” said Blackjack.

“Thank you. I hope they doesn’t make me look arrogant” said Sunny, blushing.

“Not at all. This is your true self: a goddess. Don’t be afraid to show yourself as you are.” She approached Sunny to take her hoof in her. “Are you ready?”

“I am” she said after a sigh.

“So, let’s go.”

Littlepip and Blackjack turned, trotting toward the palace, and began to climb the wide stairs in the center, their respective guards walking steadily on either side of them. Sunny and the rest of her friends followed behind, joined by Piper and Zephyrina, with Yuri docked in the slot in her chest, looking askance at Blackjack. These were followed by the other rulers and their respective guards, who together with the guards of Littlepip, Blackjack, Sunny and Piper, divided the stairs as they ascended into three sections, a central one, where the leaders of the different nations went, and two sides, where the common people went, watching anxiously.

Blackjack noticed that Littlepip was trembling slightly next to her. She identified with her; she was also quite nervous.

“Don’t worry, you’re doing well. Continue walking like this, with your nose held high, looking at the plebs with contempt. Let everyone bow before the Smol Goddess.”

“You’re a bad person.”

“I know. Tonight you can spank me as punishment.”

“I will do that. And I will enjoy it.”

“Not as much as me.”

Littlepip ducked her head slightly, trying to hide her blush, and Blackjack stifled a giggle. She would definitely never get tired of doing that to her.

The ascent took a long time, much more due to anticipation than distance, Blackjack and Littlepip trying to match the steady pace of their guards, until they finally reached the entrance to the palace, crossed the hall and reached the doors of the immense throne room, which was very similar to the original. Blackjack and Littlepip breathed deeply, feeling the weight of the moment. The guards opened the huge doors and the two mares entered, followed by the big mass of people.

They trotted down the long, elegant red carpet, heading for the throne that awaited them at the end. The two thrones with the emblem of the sun and the moon had been removed, the new one had on top a six-pointed orange star one. If history had taken a less dire direction, Blackjack thought, that star would be purple, and on that throne would sit Queen Twilight Sparkle. But this was the future they had to live, there was no point in regretting. Instead, she was glad again that they had found someone surely more capable than she and Littlepip to reign, someone who could take on the role that Celestia’s apprentice must have taken.

Reaching the end of the throne room, Littlepip and Blackjack walked up the podium and stood in front of and on either side of the throne. The members of the Royal Guard stopped and stood at attention next to the stone pillars. Sunny stopped in front of the stairs to the podium, waiting for everyone in attendance to take their positions. The leaders gathered with their guards in the half of the throne room closest to it; The rest, the people, crowded behind this first group, separated by a few royal guards.

Blackjack looked closely at the attendees, looking for someone. Not far from the throne, apart from Piper, Mara Sov and Avad, she recognized the matriarchs of the Nora tribe, Sunny’s tribe, in northern Old Spain, accompanied by the Braves. Beyond, she recognized Flurry Heart, empress of the Crystal Empire, in Old Scotland, accompanied by the Crystal Guard; Diana Prince, daughter of Hippolyta, leading the Amazon earth mares of Themyscyra, in the Mediterranean Sea; Stronghoof, head of the Steel Rangers; and Rover Snake, leading the Diamond Dogs. Finally, she recognized little Sparky, prince of New Valyria, adopted son of Hitch, biological son of Spike and grandson of Spyro, accompanied by several dragon guards who wore the emblem of the purple dragon and the black dragoness on their chest armor. Blackjack’s heart sank a little as she remembered Spike: neither she nor Littlepip managed to repair their friendship with him, before time took him too.

Finally the room was filled. Littlepip took a deep breath. Blackjack followed suit; she thought she could hear the beating of both her own heart and Littlepip’s; maybe poor Sunny’s too. Littlepip gestured with her hoof and there was silence. Then she began her speech.

“Equestria is more than a kingdom. Its history is usually said to begin when Commander Tempestas took charge of the Legio X Equestris, in the last days of Rome, but actually it begins much earlier than that...”

Blackjack didn’t need to hear the whole speech, Littlepip had already rehearsed it in front of her ad nauseum. Instead, she kept focused on the crowd. She knew it was asking too much, but she hoped to spot Boo among those gathered. After Boo adopted the mantle of Discord, she and Blackjack had grown quite distant, and even more so after Boo met that other spirit of chaos in the Boiling Isles on the corpse of that Celestial; She had become an inseparable friend of that cherub. Sometimes Blackjack and Boo had gone even decades without seeing each other. She continued searching further and further with her alicorn eyes, but she didn’t find Boo.

What she did find was someone she hadn’t seen in a long time, a cadaverous figure wrapped in rags, with a skinless face. Blackjack stood in shock at the sight of the Wasteland, smiling at her from the entrance to the throne room. At first, she shuddered slightly, but then she narrowed her eyes and returned her gaze to the Wasteland. They held their gaze for a few seconds that seemed like an eternity, neither willing to give in, until Blackjack transmitted a thought to it: You won’t win. And this was not a threat, it was a fact. The Wasteland stopped smiling, and after a few moments of tense hesitation, it vanished.

Blackjack sighed lightly. She never knew if that apparition was a hallucination or actually a manifestation of the Wasteland. Maybe she would never know. It would be great if the Wasteland had a physical body like that, she thought, because then she would just have to decapitate it with her sword to put an end to all the evils in the universe.

Blackjack tensed. The sword… She felt her side. Then the other. She didn’t notice anything. The bucking sword!

When the crown was given to Sunny, Blackjack, Littlepip and all the leaders present would have to draw their weapon and deliver the salute. And Blackjack had left her sword in her bedroom. Her eyes quickly scanned the room, thinking of a way to take the sword of a guard, her or not, without anyone noticing using telekinesis and pass it off as her own. She saw no opportunity, and Littlepip was already finishing her speech.

“Psst” someone said not far from Blackjack, behind one of the two pillars closest to the throne. Blackjack turned and recognized the servant she had dispatched earlier in her room. The servant timidly pointed to her side. Blackjack’s sword was hanging from it in its sheath.

Blackjack put on a relieved and apologetic smile. But she stopped smiling when she realized that there was no way to attract the floating sword towards her without anyone present noticing. Or so she thought, because the servant gently felt the sword and it disappeared with its sheath. Blackjack felt a new weight on her right side. She looked at it and saw that her sword was there, hidden under her suit. Blackjack turned her head toward the servant, wondering how a thestral mare had done that. She responded by smiling with a mouth in which a long, unmatched fang stood out and winking one of two yellow eyes with red irises. The servant turned around and went back the way she had come, leaving Blackjack stunned and, after thinking about it for a few seconds, quite happy. Luckily, she was able to compose herself in time to hear Littlepip finish her speech.

Littlepip and Blackjack spread further apart and gave Sunny permission to climb the steps and sit on the throne. Littlepip gave the signal. Blackjack lit her horn and floated Luna’s crown off her head, while Littlepip did the same with Celestia’s crown. The two mares brought both crowns together on Sunny’s head and, casting a practiced spell on them, fused them into one, forming a golden crown with a six-pointed orange gem in the middle. Slowly, they lowered the crown and placed it on Sunny’s head.

Littlepip and Blackjack drew their sword, and all the leaders and guards gathered in the throne room did the same. Blackjack looked briefly at her sword: Dawn, she had found out its name was; the sword of Sir Arthur Dayne, forged of star metal, like the armors of the panserbjørn. A very special sword, no doubt, but not as special as Littlepip’s sword: Excalibur, Arthur Pendragon’s sword, given to Celestia when Brandon Stark gave her and Luna the throne of Camelot and the Seven Anglo-Saxon Kingdoms, so long ago.

Littlepip approached Sunny and handed her the ancient sword, which she accepted very carefully, as if fearing that her rough hooves might break or scratch it, and held it upright, the blade facing the ground and the pommel upwards, supported by her two front hooves. Littlepip backed away and knelt. That was the signal.

“Long live the Queen!” shouted Blackjack, kneeling and resting Dawn’s tip on the ground.

“Long live the Queen!” shouted Flurry Heart, kneeling and resting Longclaw’s tip on the ground.

“Long live the Queen!” shouted Sparky, kneeling and resting Darkpyre’s tip on the ground.

“Long live the Queen!” shouted all the leaders and all the guards and Sunny’s friends, kneeling and resting the tip of their weapons on the ground. And the rest of the attendees, spread out from the throne room to the plaza below, knelt like a breaking wave, until everyone in Camelot, except Sunny, was kneeling on the ground.

It was a new world, a new golden age. Blackjack knew it wouldn’t last forever; She knew that evil never rested, and that it was not always defeated. Neither Light nor Darkness ever completely won; As it was said, peace was just a pause in an endless war. But those were future battles. Tonight would be about enjoying the company of Sunny and her new friends, having a nice, chaotic chat with Boo, maybe even playing cards with her and Sunny’s group, and before going to sleep, sharing a night of passion with her everlasting companion, Littlepip, who had been at her side for so many centuries, and who would continue to be present in her heart after time had taken her too. She sighed. It would be so sad if after time took Blackjack too, her soul couldn’t be reunited with Littlepip, Glory, P-21, and the rest of the people she had loved in her life. If this was going to be the case, there was nothing she could do about it, so there was no point in dwelling on it. Whatever the case, she had Littlepip and Sunny’s group by her side right now, and she was willing to enjoy their company for as long as she could. Because that was her light in the darkness: the magic of friendship.

* * *

Oxford, Kingdom of England. May 31, 2024

In another of an infinite number of timelines, one in which Twilight received the crown and became queen of Equestria, one in which Valyrian fire bombs did not burn the world, Lyra Heartstrings rested sitting on a bench at the edge of a pond, as she did at the end of each month, following the agreed ritual. She was sitting on the right side, in the same posture as humans, a habit she had adopted during her brief stay on Earth, with her left hoof slightly extended toward the center, knowing that, in another universe, Will Parry would be sitting on the left side, making the same gesture with the hand. Their only way to be together in a multiverse where they could never be together again. Right?

That was a question she had asked herself on a few occasions. She couldn’t reopen the portals that led to Earth, he couldn’t reopen the portals that led to Terra; these versions of Lyra and Will could not be seen again in any timeline. This was a fact, which she had accepted and overcome. And her life without him was far from sad and lonely. She had a promising career ahead of her in the service of Queen Twilight, and her protector, Agent Bon, was a great friend who kept her good company; Maybe with time they could be more than friends. Yes, Lyra had a happy life, but still the question remained: was there any other way to see him again?

Then it hit her. She had a way of knowing the answer, a very effective way. Why not resort to it? She had nothing to lose. So she took out the alethiometer with her telekinesis (she didn’t want to move the hoof out of place) and, moving the needles, posed the question.

She had already asked the alethiometer before if there was a paradise or hell, whether Christian, Hindu or any other terranian or terrestrial religion, and the answer had been a resounding no, which she already expected. She had also asked it, fearfully, if time was circular, and if therefore everything that happened was repeated in the future in an infinite loop, to which it also responded, to her relief, no. Knowing this, the answer to the question should not raise any doubts. The question was: “When a person dies, no matter what universe they are in, are they literally reunited in some way with the people they loved in life, preserving consciousness and memories?” The answer was: “Yes.”

And with that she had enough; she didn’t need the more technical details or the exact sciences behind that statement. Lyra closed the alethiometer with a smile and continued sitting on the bench, remembering Will fondly. In the end, she would be reunited with her deceased loved ones, as would Twilight, Will, and everyone in this and every other timeline, she thought with joy. But they would join them in due time. For the moment, she was alive, and the living must live.