“Now this... this is what you find if you ask anypony about me.”
Welcome to the cut-up original version of my life. Sort of. I cleaned a few things up.
Well... mostly cut up. A few of these will have their own chapter, but that’s for the big stuff. Feature-length, double-length, some of the parts you can’t easily summarize in a couple paragraphs, that sort of thing.
For those who don’t know me, I am Falak Disc. Wolf paw, eagle talon, different sort of eyes... basically, different sort of dad-style draconequus.
And dad is Discord, though my eyes... we never speak of the monster that is Dad’s ex-girlfriend.
Well, I think it all started when my parents were involved in an accident.
It didn't make sense how, crashing into a lake like we did, I was the only one lucid to, as a teenager, save two full grown adults.
Unfortunately, sense has an odd habit of not going near my mother and father, who were actually a couple nobody knew before he appeared and disappeared with no trace.
Some people from far say dad went by Scoddri. Local others called him Disc. They all said my mom's name was Cara Andal.
All dad left me was a necklace with an emerald crystal that seemed to pulse dimly with an energy, and a sister who had another crystal that fit perfectly with mine.
She said our dad had tried to give her some power at the cost of his life, but when she refused it, a girl with purple hair had torn it from him and his body crumbled to dust, the crystal split in half...
Ha! Just kidding; that last part's another world! I get things confused easily now, especially with what I know.
You see, I thought I lived a normal life with so much misfortune that I just contemplated vanishing, but I just kept on.
Nearly losing my human parents to a crazy episode made by mom did not do anything to help matters.
I mean, a boulder hurtling straight for your face? Dear Faust, it was terrifying.
Suddenly knowing everything about my birth parents' home AND the boulder stopping in midair and turning into a ball of fluffy cotton candy? Sweet Tartarus, no one can imagine the surprise of that. The candy was delicious, but I was jarred by the mismatched horns.
I managed to put the powers on a switch, though. Who am I to have the impressive cosmic powers of a Djinn?
I am Fal Robins, born Falak Disc, child of Discord and Cosmos. My mom is more evil in her crazy than dad, and that's why she doesn't get parole from the stars she was locked in.
Nice to meet you.
Okay, so my dad was a perfectly normal property manager, and my mom taught medical at a career college.
I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life, and we were driving out to a camping site.
I looked up at the night sky, the Andalusian constellation, a heart composed of six stars, shining bright as ever.
Actually, a bit brighter.
Looking into mom's eyes, she was glazed over, muttering, "Soon, my son, you shall be free of that mortal shell..." as the car sped up.
I thought she was just delirious but she didn't respond to seatkicking or my scrap-bar foil, and we were driving straight into the lake and Dad was trying to stop her before falling asleep unnaturally and I was scared and-
AAAGGH, I JUST CAN'T! Do you know how traumatizing it was?
After we plunged in, I waited for the pressure to equalize, using the rebreathers we had packed to keep mom and dad alive. There were only two though. I just decided to hold my breath and drag them ashore. I was lucky to catch a breath of air, slapping my parents silly to wake them from the trance, before passing out from the exertion.
The one thing I noticed was that the shine of the constellation had normalized, and a whisper saying, "What has my husband done to you, little Falak?" Falak? That wasn't my name, I thought as I passed out, a phrase John de Lancie never said as Discord filling my head.
One score, minus four Power removed and body confused I hide you from your mother vile Against her wrath, away I file With the rulers, I seal her in the stars One year after, stay from cars
Examining the poem, I found it bore resemblance to a Curse of Scores, the spell Discord used to seal away the ponies in the “Five Score, Divide By Four” world.
That makes sense. If the voice was my real mother, then she was the one who controlled them to set up the accident.
Sealed in the stars... If the caster was Discord, then by Issues 75 and 76 of the comics, the culprit, and my mother, was Cosmos!
I knew the stars had just appeared when I turned 16, but I never expected that on my birthday camping trip, she would try to kill me and my human parents just to get me back!
Of course, after I realized what the poem meant, I decided to read at the base of the cliffs, just finishing Harry Potter 5 when I heard Cosmos' voice again, saying "If I can't kill your parents, I'll settle for just YOU!"
The shadow that appeared over my head, and the boulder that made it, gave me a shock.
"WAAAGH!" I instinctively and foolishly threw up my hands to stop the boulder, snapping my fingers one last time before I was crushed by my crazy mother trapped in the stars-!
POOF!
I opened my eyes... and was bemused, if not shocked, at what I saw.
“Huh. Neat.”
As soon as I snapped my fingers, two horns, one draconic and the other a unicorn's, had appeared on my head, I began to float, and most importantly, the boulder turned into a ball of cotton candy and just hovered there.
Instinctively and curiously, I took a bite. "Mmmm... bubblegum and cinna-roll!"
Of course, having some knowledge of what a draconequus can do, I wasn't very surprised I could turn pure stone into cotton candy.
I decided to keep the incident at the cliff a secret, my appetite allowing me to finish off the sugary sphere of former stone, and returned to the campsite.
I had made a sphere of safety where Cosmos couldn't do anything, and since it was the last day we were camping, I had cast it on the car for the way back.
I just snapped my fingers, magicked a scrying crystal to watch what was happening with birth-dad, when suddenly it showed me in it, but that's impossible because Discord was back in Fourth Equestria last I checked and I don't think he could get away from-
"Falaaaak! I'm heeeeere!"
Oh yeah, he can travel through dimensions. Beside him was...
"Dad," I asked him, "you brought Fluttershy and my sister Screwball to Reality?"
"Not just them," He said, explaining that he wanted me to use my magic for a gift for Luna's first moonrise, the mare stepping out from behind him. I was shocked. Here it was, the chance to do something truly wonderful for Luna! I snapped my fingers...
HEARTH'S WARMING EVE, 980 YEARS UNTIL LUNA'S ESCAPE
...and we were at the deathbed of a single ice blue mare with a snow white mane.
One that changed winter in Equestria forevermore.
For my gift to Luna, I decided to give her... Snowdrop.
"Snowdrop," I began, "here upon your grave I grant you three gifts for your contribution to winter and your friendship to Luna. My first gift is that you will finally see all you have helped create."
With those words, vivid pictures of everything Snowdrop ever did filled her head and I saw a single tear fall from her blind eye.
"My second gift is that your snow, every flake of it, shall never be forgotten or forlorn as long as the winter winds blow, and my third and most precious gift," I beamed as I said those words, "is that your voice, your story, will carry to the four corners of the world on the winds and see every wonder of Equestria through your own two eyes. You shall never leave Luna alone ever again, and when the snowdrop flower blooms every year, you will be revitalized. Live once more, Snowdrop, and be joyous at what you have gained...," I cried joyously as I said the final words, "in all these years. Live for all you have done, and all the ponies you call friend, for life is truly wonderful, and the greatest gift I can bestow upon you is that you are able to experience it with the pony you call your best friend. So mote it BE!" At that moment, the snowdrop bloomed, an energy flowing into Snowdrop as she emerged from her bed youthful once more, a snowflake falling past the window and her eyes, now devoid of cataracts, giving her a glimpse of the five who had given her life. I couldn't contain myself anymore and neither could they, all of us piling around her and embracing the filly, the mare, the wonderful blind pegasus who brought the greatest wonders of snow to the winter.
Luna, silent throughout all of this, finally let out a sigh and spoke.
"’Tis wonderful to see you, my old friend, but I cannot stay. However, I can offer you solace, and two gifts of my own for this Hearth's Warming; the ability to enter the dreamscape, and an amulet which will let you use your affiinity for the cold, and your natural magic, to create such wonderful things. To use your magic for spellcraft, focus on the spell you want to cast and focus your magic through the pendant."
Her horn glowed, and Snowdrop tested her newfound magic as the snowflake shaped pendant around her neck began to glow an ice blue, a block of magic made to feel and act like ice forming in the center of the room before Snowdrop formed it into a sculpture of a flower, the excess "ice" crushed to snow and vanishing into the pendant before Snowdrop let go and the rest of the ice vanished into her.
"She received the magic to enchant the pendant from me. From this point she must draw upon that magic to manipulate the snow, the ice, the very moisture of the air, to do what she wishes with her own innate abilities," Luna explained as Snowdrop tested a basic levitation spell before teleporting to the north, Luna saying the pendant will shield her from the cold, which can strengthen her power.
Satisfied we were able to grant Snowdrop a chance to live to see her friend, I snapped my fingers and Luna departed for Equestria, my relatives and Fluttershy staying behind and getting to bond.
I wondered about Snowdrop, though, What would happen?
Snowdrop trekked through the North, the cold flowing around her and infusing her with energy.
She trudged through the untouched snow, her pendant glowing as snow collected behind her.
Finally, she reached the mountains, her power channelling the snow from her stroll into a palace of pure, dense blue ice.
An odd chill of foreboding settled around the courtyard as windigos flowed into the palace towers, which had no entryways other than the windows atop them, and Snowdrop felt at home as a chill settled around her, her ice blue corporeal form fading to an ethereal yet regal visage.
Snowdrop, the leader of a sect of Windigos that fed not on hatred, but harmony and friendship, as well as possessing the ability to take on a corporeal form, sighed with relief. One day later, and she would have left her sect with no leader.
Her sect was mortal as anypony else because of their odd diet by windigo standards, as well as their corporeal forms, but that was what made her sect the best, as they, the Winter Winds, were made responsible for ferrying the wishes from the first snowfalls up to the stars.
That fateful night she carved the snowflake, they had whispered to her, longing for a leader that could show them through the times of harmony, and even though she was blind, they took to her bright demeanor and craft as swift as a hare.
All Equestria would hear her tale upon the winds... That gift was one she valued the most.
Windigos, especially royals, had a long life, and most windigos were linked to the royal. The rejuvenation effect of the snowdrop spell had given them a boost, and the new throne she had gave her at least someplace to sit.
Sighing, Snowdrop reassumed her corporeal form, her pendant glowing as she teleported back to her home as Snowdrop, the snowflake mare, and her windigos settled into the towers.
Little did she know that the blessing extended to any world the Displacement Effect had touched.
Okay, a world where there are nice Windigos and Snowdrop is one of them? That's schweet. And that happens to be MY Fourth Equestria!
Well, after we had kept my parents safe from mom, I decided to do some things before leaving them.
First, I considered my alternate selves. How they could suffer in the mundanity of Reality! I imparted a slice of my magic into the fabric of reality, saying if they were truly dissatisfied, they could leave reality and enter their favorite place.
Two, I went to four points in Equestria to impart knowledges of futures that could be if they don't get their act together.
Also, I messed with a friendship lesson from season 8.
(Point 1: Sire's Hollow)
Sunburst had just gotten his mark, and proud, he was rushing out the door when an odd creature popped in.
"Sunburst," it said, "think of how Starlight would feel if you just left! Starlight, think of the friends you can make. Don't let a silly destiny flank tattoo drive you apart! Or better yet, let me show you BOTH what happens!"
It placed its mismatched hands on their heads, their eyes glowing as they saw each other's futures when Sunburst left. This surprised somepony outside the window.
"Oh, future Glimmer,” the creature said. “Hi. I just gave you something. Now you two fillies keep in touch no matter what, okay?" The future ponies then departed to do their episode, and I vanished after Sunburst told his parents that he didn't want the cutie mark to drive them apart.
He was still promptly taken away, but Starlight still remembered what had happened to him. What did he see?, she thought as he thought the same thing about what she saw.
Suddenly, the two froze as the creature apparently chose to answer that from afar.
Starlight saw a wall, laden with cutie marks, and six jars, all of them breaking and the marks returning to ponies behind her, before seeing a scroll open and a portal whisking her to Cloudsdale, where she encased a cyan pegasus in crystal and saw... well, every last one of the timelines in the Cutie Re-mark.
Sunburst, on the other hand, saw himself being less than successful in the practical application of magic, letters with red seals piling behind him as he studied every magic book there was in a house overlooked by a crystal spire.
The two of them shared one last look as the creature, satisfied, vanished to the next point on his list.
(Point 2: Cloudsdale)
The parents of one Rainbow Dash, Bow Hothoof and Windy Whistles, received a letter just as an explosion of color painted the sky, opening it to read,
Dear parents of Rainbow Dash/Rainbow Dash herself,
You're probably/Your parents were wondering about the blast of color that just appeared. That was actually your daughter/you. Yes, she/you performed a Sonic Rainboom. This is better than you think, as today, a day I call the Day Of Destiny, would not be fully realized if not for that one event. Your daughter has/You have unknowingly ensured the fate of Equestria as its Element of Loyalty, and with that blast of color, five other fillies have realized their own destinies, and together, they/you will guide your world to harmony.
-A friend.
P.S: This flash-paper letter will self-destruct after Rainbow reads the next postscript or if it is removed.
P.P.S: Fluttershy is fine. She is also one of the fillies who Dash/you helped with destiny.
At that moment, Rainbow arrived at their doorstep and read through the letter as carefully as she could. True to its word, the letter burnt away with no trace after Rainbow read the second postscript.
The only thing she could say, knowing such a thing, was, "These next years are going to be awesome!"
Nopony noticed the future unicorn and alicorn returning to their time.
(Point 3: Cozy Glow's house)
No sooner did Cozy discover a new penpal than a letter appeared in front of her.
She read, and was shocked to see a vision of herself in a cage next to a withered centaur.
She shook it off and began to read the letter, but the details were still branded in her head as she read.
Dear Cozy Glow,
That vision you saw? It was real. Or at least, it will be, if you grub for power by banishing magic from Equestria. That centaur, believe it or not, was Tirek. He gets stronger and looks better the more magic he absorbs from ponies. Yes, that old centaur was your penpal, and as you saw, your possible future cellmate.
-A concerned outlier who knows things about everypony
P.S: This message will brand itself into your head as it self-destructs. Which is now.
Sure enough, the paper burned away, while the words glowed blue and flew into her eyes.
She only had one thing to say about it.
"Golly, I seem messed up in hindsight.“
She put a hoof to her chin as she pondered, “Or is it technically foresight since it hasn't actually happened yet?"
(Point 4: The Ursa Cave Where Tempest Lost Her Horn)
Fizzlepop Berrytwist had just been attacked by an Ursa Minor, losing her horn in the process.
However, a perfect crystalline replication of her horn, wrapped in a letter, appeared.
She opened the letter, the horn attaching to her on its own as if it had a will, and read.
Dear Fizzlepop Berrytwist,
I thought I'd give you a part of yourself back. In return, could you do me a favor?
In the desert oasis of Abyssinia, there is a jewel known as the Misfortune Malachite. As it says, it causes disaster, but it also grants power.
Could you NOT go that way? I don't want you to be conscripted by the evil Storm King. It has a cousin known as the Good Fortune Garnet, in the Thunder Jungle right now, but only a special pegasus weather trick can reach the jungle through a perpetual thunderhead.
It also can only be used, or even lifted, by those that have pure intentions for it.
Okay, just going to pick the point back up... What I'm saying is that it may be hard to keep your friends, but you just have to do your best.
-The One Who Knows
P.S: This letter is made of flash paper and has the power to transfer knowledge and visions. Fwoosh.
She was surprised as the words flew into her, imparting knowledge of a rougher, more broken, betrayed version of her known only as Tempest Shadow as she was thrown off the castle balcony. Tempest Shadow... it had a nice ring to it. She went to her friends and told them what happened when the Ursa attacked, presenting the piece of her horn that had broken off.
(Changed Lesson: Spike the Water)
Rain Shine, leader of the Kirin, couldn't be bothered to care.
It wasn't her fault, though. It was all the anger that led her to douse the whole village in the Stream of Silence.
Still, she couldn't help but feel a twinge when she received a threatening letter, and Autumn Blaze ran into the village.
Autumn Blaze, the one Kirin that spoke, could absolutely care!
After all, she had discovered the way to undo the effect of the Stream of Silence, and while that meant she could turn into a Nirik she at least knew that rage was just an emotion like any other and-
Hey, what's this letter?...
Oh.
Dear.
Faust.
SHE HAD TO WARN RAIN SHINE!
She ran down to the village, the letter in her mouth reading,
I am going.
To spike the water spring.
With Foal's Breath.
Neither you or Rain can stop me.
You'll never see it coming.
Also, you seriously need to take Autumn's example and know how to chill.
Anger is simply emotion, and without emotion, we are empty.
Without the rain, the basalt of the Hawaiian islands from my world cannot be fertile, and there also can't be rainbows.
Both letters will self-destruct after the first sips are taken.
Rain tilted her head when she saw Autumn and compared her letter to theirs.
Of course, it was hard to miss the descending bouquet of flowers falling into the water and tinting it blue, a kirin taking a drink and subsequently beginning to talk.
Rain Shine took a sip, went to the Stream of Silence, and before she went back in and doused the other kirin, she simply said, "This will be a problem, if we cannot drink without unleashing our blazing hearts."
Neither of them missed the letters burning up. ------------------------------------------------------ Well, I changed the situation a bit. Either way, the next thing I did was check my alt-selves. After all, with all the perpendicularity, who knows when they are?
Kid and Filly had gotten the furthest, but it was stalling chapters, so I just sent a message.
After that, I decided to rehearse what I would say to Twilight.
"Hmmm... maybe, ‘Fear me not, young pupil, for I mean no ill will to those who imprison my parents the Draconequui. I am the knower of fate, and I am the one to scorn it. I am the one who wields fate, for I am the one who has shorn it. Anon, I ask my own power, scour the land for the viles and virtuous. Find the stars that hold my mother, and anon see them scattered where none can find. As for yours, Twilight Sparkle, bear no ill to me, and no ill to my father. I imagine his devastation that he was to send away his son and leave my sister alone...' Yeah, that's good."
I took to chaos stuff pretty well, I think. I always wanted powers, and I only went crazy once. Twice.
"Gaze upon the work of Heemeyer!," I shouted as I drove an armored bulldozer down the road as if it was no oddity.
And then there was the time I put my spin on Daughter of Evil. "Heheha!" No, I don't expect kneeling!
Once upon a time in a land so far away Was a lord of chaos that few ponies dared to face And aside his father, chaos with friends as his stage Was his noble child only seventeen of age There was nothing anywhere the child could have missed "Mother locked in the stars, it's just dad and me and sis" Land aloud with chaos and his name was as a rafe 'Till their father locked his power just to keep him safe
Then atop his seventeenth his mother went to take Away Falak's life and his man-parents in a lake When they all survived she planned to kill him with a stone Right when he reclaimed his power and throne!
"Mmm... Bubblegum and cinna-roll!"
Blooming ever sweet, the poison joke will reap Planning its punchline 'till it's out there to see Giving away gifts and making interest for his selves Now comes Falak Disc to find his place Equestria he dwells!
Okay, now it was time to go. Don’t want the crazy star lady to try her luck again!
I snapped my fingers, and like I was never there, I was gone in a poof.
Sunset was plotting, as is common for pre-zero Sunset, when a boy suddenly appeared in front of her in a poof of smoke.
"Helloooo-oh, wrong world. Hi, Sunny!"
He then snapped his fingers and vanished as she noticed the other features on him.
“Were those... Draconequus horns?"
A demure beat began to play around me as I began to sing a very fitting tune.
Back in this place filled with so many wonders Casting the spell that I was always under Squirrels in the trees and the cute little bunnies, Birds flying free and the bees with their honey Honey...
Here in this magical place Sole free member of the draconequus race Had I all my power flowing out of the sleeve I'd have come here sooner and never leave
I love Equestriaaaaaa!
I then realized I was in the statue garden, and a pink-lavender filly was clapping while a white alicorn watched on in confusion and recognition.
"Before you ask, Princess," I said, "I am not my father. Or my mother you don't remember because he took the fall after you put her away. That said, how's my little sister Screwy been?"
Screwball chirped, "Mainly sulking about Dad, but otherwise just fine and unpredictable, Fally!"
Celestia no doubt realized I had some modicum of Discord's powers if I could just appear, but I was much more open to friendship as I waved to a passing guard while my sister just hid away.
I snapped my fingers, and while Celly visibly flinched, I only summoned a list. "Okay, check on sister, check, introduce to Celestia without getting clinked for the first season, check, give dad a letter detailing what happened as I reclaimed my powers..."
I floated a parchment and quill up and wrote the events, then rolled it up and placed it in a chest. "...okay, got that one. Now then, go to Ponyville, have party, give Pinkie cool powers..."
I watched a wisp of smoke travel out of the throne room. "...that's just about to be checked off, but first..."
I snapped my fingers and teleported to the chariot. Just in time; Twilight was just getting on. "Before I apply for a travelling business, I wanted to say some things. First, I am the one who knows your fate, but not how much I can scorn it. Second, a cryptic fact; There is another, and we'll be in touch. Third, a clue; You and five others got your marks at the same time, and it may just be fate you converge for this night in particular. Fourth, my dad is a statue right now, and you'll face him when the clouds are cotton candy. Lastly, your destiny is much greater than you could ever imagine. Hail Twilight, student of sun. Hail Twilight, bearer of the greatest power. Hail Twilight, your mark upon the Tree."
I then turned to Celestia and said, "Okay, let's discuss the permit to travel and peddle my wares, your radiance."
We sat down at a table in one of the castle’s conference rooms to talk business. "I'm interested in peddling a market no other could dream of wherever the plot takes me. Same business as my uncle Bizcord, and yes, I have a lot of uncles."
I turned away sorrowfully and gazed at the emerald heart necklace as I gave it to Screwball. "Poor uncle Scoddri, shafted by a decision with no clear consequence..."
Celestia then dropped a single small stack of papers and a typewriter in front of me.
"No chaos powers on this, and you have a deal on the wagon," she said, at which I dropped a copy of Discord's New Business in front of her.
"Pleasure doing business," I said as I doffed a hat summoned for a split second, then started on my papers and sent out some special messages; one magical construct to deliver a message, and a letter with packaged spectrocapacitor-slash-arcanometer-slash-decryptor-slash-whatever it was for Sci-Twi.
And a fragmented message in the form of magic translated into an MLP clip, scattered around the Human World like a geocache... actually, more like a dead-drop. "Now then..."
Wallflower Blush had spent another day in the background.
As usual.
After all, she wasn't the most memorable person was she.
She honestly felt like singing a song about it, but she barely had the first words when a faint voice seemed to come from nowhere.
"Wallflower...
Wallflower!
Wallflower Blush!"
She turned to find a small mote of light at the edge of the forest, which seemed to radiate the sound.
"Follow me... I can show you something that may interest you."
Wallflower was skeptical about following something supernatural into a forest, but she followed the sprite into the wood, where it turned off the path towards a rock formation and settled above a golden flower.
"This is the Garden of Forgotten Things, the resting place of a powerful artifact from my home. Dig under this flower, and its power will be yours."
Well, it is a beautiful flower, Wallflower thought to herself.
Wallflower dug up the flower, placing it in a convenient nearby pot, and was surprised when she came across a vellum satchel, which she opened to reveal an intricately carved stone and what looked like instructions to use it to manipulate memory fragments.
"This is the Memory Stone. Once wielded by a corrupt sorceress that plagued the land of Equestria, she was stopped by Clover the Clever, the apprentice to Starswirl the Bearded, as one of his trials. Though she erased the pursuit from his mind many times, he kept a record of the journey to remind himself, and eventually, the pursuit led to its burial here. She only used it to erase memories, but it can also be used to restore what it has taken, as long as the third sun has not set on its removal. Also, I demand your oath that you will not use it to do any true evil upon your compatriots. Do you so swear, Wallflower Blush?"
Wallflower contemplated for a moment before sighing and saying clearly, "I solemnly swear to do no evil upon my fellow man with the power that is afforded me. Let me honor this oath for my days here, or let me forfeit these powers to they who have given this artifact its power."
This satisfied the sprite, who simply said, "So mote it be. Maybe my creator can take you to a Fall Formal Dance in the future? Keep the Magnus Tegmen, I have confidence it'll interest you. I am Amnes, Messenger of Chaos and Guardian of Memory."
The sprite then flew into her arm, where it branded a pattern similar to those on the stone, which hummed with an energy foreign to Wallflower.
Wallflower just smiled and walked back.
Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and Rarity all received a single message from those they perceived had slighted them; Rainbow Dash and Applejack to each other, Pinkie to Rarity and Fluttershy, and Rarity and Fluttershy to Pinkie.
What you believe I did, I was not truly the one who was at fault, and neither were you. Did you ever think to confirm that?
It then detailed what had really happened; Rainbow Dash had believed Applejack's bake sale had moved, Pinkie believed Fluttershy wanted a loud party instead of a silent auction, and Rarity believed Pinkie had all the volunteers she needed. They met at the soccer field, where they shared a passing look of guilt and walked away, another message appearing on their phones from a completely different person.
I know you can't forgive the following times, but you can at least say it's done. When me and my friend come, you can start to heal. It would be sooner, but I and mine are slaves to fate. I'll treat you to a free... day service, shall we say, when I come there.
When they tried to reply, their phones said it was a number not in use.
Twilight had received a strange device as soon as classes got out. It literally just appeared in front of her on her desk in the lab. It looked like a lens with a circle in the middle, frosted triangles surrounding it. Beneath that was a screen with three buttons beside it.
It looked like it attached to her spectrometer, so she did, the screen going over the gauge, and the triangles started to light up and act like a compass, changing which ones were lit up by. She followed it to a clearing and noticed something odd.
In the middle was a ball of light, just floating there, and she could only see it through the lens. Even odder was that, when she aligned the lens with it, it got sucked up and letters appeared on the screen in two distinct lines.
clap your hooves
will appear from time to time.
Twilight realized these phenomena were storing fragments of data from someone, or something. She could also assume that from the words, there were more; at least four.
"Well, I might as well see what it says," she reasoned as she followed the next signature.
It took some time, but Twilight had collected all the pieces of the message.
clap your hooves/ladybugs awake,/and do a little shake!/Sunshine, sunshine,
will appear from time to time./Magic orbs with messages like these/The next one comes later./Greetings. I am Falak.
"Of course... The message is jumbled with the words! Now if I just..."
Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake, clap your hooves and do a little shake!
Greetings. I am Falak. Magic orbs with messages like these will appear from time to time. The next one comes later.
The moment she had fit them into place, a jaunty Do-do-do-do do-do-do-do! played, followed by the screen displaying a single line of text.
MESSAGE ARCHIVED
Twilight was confused. Magic?
The orbs and attachment were connected to this Falak person, and they had just appeared. "So he wants me to use this to decode the messages he sends, and they're connected to an order. That first one reminded me a bit of my babysitter Cadence, but... Hooves? What, is he living in a land of ponies?"
Ding!
Just then, the screen flared back to life with a list of messages.
Twilight clicked the one reading "My World," which had more fragments near Crystal Prep, and the triangles flared back on.
"So, I choose which messages to track? It's like a dead drop hunt!"
Twilight then returned to her study, a new event in her head not stopping her from being the best student.
Now if she could get Everton approval...
Ding!
The device just flashed again with a fully-compiled message labelled as "What They Don't Get, part 1" added to the list. Curious, Twilight opened it up.
My Little Pony, My Little Pony, what is friendship all about?
I know what you're thinking, and there are things that
"I guess these fully-compiled messages have to be further separated," Twilight said as she switched her active record to "What They Don't Get, Part 2."
Oooooh my gosh. I really underestimated the paperwork.
I just finished getting my permit and loading my wagon, though. Now to ride for Ponyville.
I don't think you need the details, so more interluding!
Twilight had just finished collecting all the pieces of "What They Don't Get, Part 2," and she was about to assemble the other part of the message. After she did, the two messages compiled into a whole.
My Little Pony, My Little Pony, what is friendship all about? My Little Pony, My Little Pony, friendship is magic!
I know what you're thinking, and there are things that one person can't do alone. In Everton, you'll be alone.
MESSAGE COMBINED AND ARCHIVED ADDITIONAL AUDIO ATTACHMENT COMPILED
Additional audio attachment?
Twilight was curious, and so she tapped Listen, at which two earbuds popped out, which she put on as the music began.
My Little Pony, My Little Pony, what is friendship all about? My Little Pony, My Little Pony, friendship is magic! (My Little Pony) I used to wonder what friendship could be (My Little Pony) Until you all shared its magic with me!
When the song was done, Twilight realized that this was the full form of the song lines the message was based on.
She also realized it seemed to be sung in HER voice, from her perspective.
"I should really get on the explanation for that world," she said as she shook her head, re-selected "My World," and began to collect the pieces.
The pieces are falling together, Twilight thought as she assembled the message's bars.
It used to be so simple, it was a world I understood; I didn't know what I didn't know, and life seemed pretty good But now the darkness rises from somewhere deep inside of me Her power overtakes me; can I keep this Midnight from getting free?
My world is known as Equestria. We have had some secret interactions with yours, be it the student to our princess, three seaponies feeding on negativity, or just an artifact that manipulates memory. You will find yourself entangled in the same way after Zero occurs.
The song seemed familiar, yet distant to Twilight.
As if to answer the question she was about to have, a new marker set labelled "Zero" made itself available.
Sunburst, theoretical genius of Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, and Starlight Glimmer, practical genius that didn't get in with Sunburst, had corresponded much better than they would have.
Starlight and Sunburst had created a good amount of knowledge together, Starlight's tenacity allowing her to write a thesis on the interactions of the powerful harmonic magic of constructs based on the Tree of Harmony with Starswirl's time spell.
Of course, she currently lacked the most important material in the spell to prove the thesis: The Cutie Map itself.
However, she did explore the effects of Cogerio, Fiducia Compelus, and Persuadere together, and even improved the resultant spellweave with other spells like Tribus Modem!
Sunburst helped rein her in, pursuing his own projects on the magic of friendship and spellweaving, and the two of them enjoyed notes from their mysterious benefactor from long ago.
Of course, Starlight realized in those memories that she would have to play the villain eventually, and you know what?
Both of them were okay with that. Sort of. Starlight was still unnerved by the similarities of the future fate had dealt her to the short story Falak had sent with his latest letter.
She read the title and shuddered at the lengths that government went to make its every citizen entirely equal.
Harrison Bergeron
Capper, a charming abyssinian aristocrat turned Klugetown con with his friend Chummer, felt life was going well for him.
A letter addressed to him about "the six stars of your old king" certainly helped when he found another friend in letters, though definitely not when the first one read,
A long time ago, a draconequus named Cosmos crashed in my dad's garden.
They had fun for a bit, dad consented to a child, but when the two of them took Equestria, Dad KNEW mom was crazy, especially when she turned a school for the underprivileged into a towering inferno with thrones on top!
(The cupholders are irrelevant.)
I got sent away for protection, lived what, seventeen years as a non-magical Realitan human before mom tried to kill me twice, and dad took all the blame for mom's actions after he, Aspen, Novo with her Pearl, your king (I believe the king at that time was a black cat,) and both Equestrian diarchs wielding the Elements of Harmony sealed her into a heart-shaped constellation.
Which I'm pretty sure is broken and scattered across the land in the form of six magenta gems in the shape of eight-pointed stars.
At that, Capper looked over his shoulder.
Sure enough, an eight-pointed magenta star-shaped gem was, as usual, topping the trophy for the Klugetown Muck Marathon.
He shuddered at the possibility of those gems, especially when he read,
I know there's a star there, and let me tell you, there's something even worse. If a strong enough being adorns one, say... an alicorn princess, Cosmos can gain control of them and maybe even more ordinary ponies like a Zebrican shamaness!
I say being because I'm not sure if mom can possess Abyssinians like you and Chummer.
But I'm getting off topic. Discord enjoyed a nice bit of chaotic peace, bore my sister Screwball, got petrified, and now here we are at the precipice of Luna returning!
I just want you to know that Chummer, loath as I am to say it, usually betrayed you and Verko when the Misfortune Malachite rolls about, leaving you in debt.
Take it from the guy who knows that if you fight Cosmos when the quest to reunite the Stars reaches you (remember, the one who organized the quest was possessed by my mom,) you get turned into a house cat.
And know that if you get into debt, I will bail you out.
Just write and I'll come running, we'll say it's agreed. I have a feeling I'm the friend YOU need.
Manipulating fate, Falak Disc.
Well, Capper thought, that last bit sounds like it'll make a nice tune in itself. Either way, he turned to Chummer, I thought I could depend on him. Then again, who CAN you depend on here? After all, he cleared his throat as he began to improvise a song that just came to him from the lines at the end of the letter,
This town is not a nice place for little fillies all alone There are lots of twists and corners that could lead to the unknown Chummer was my friend, but he would sell me for a gem... There are better friends who trust in me, and I can trust in them...
"...well, it's true, but it just doesn't croon 'Capper the trustworthy guide,' does it? Now, those last two lines... What about,"
Let me guide your way and I'll be sure to help you through You could really use a friend out here, and luckily for you...
"...Now THAT sounds like me. Ahem..."
I'm the friend that you need when you're lost and don't know what to do I'm your pal, your amigo Useful and resourceful too And my help, you'll concede, is a plus, guaranteed You can call and I'll come running, just follow my lead!
Capper chuckled as he thought of the cons he could pull, of the actual friends he could make with this new image!
'Cause I'm the friend you need!
(Cue Ponies Got The Beat) "Finally! Just in time for the fireworks to begin!," I exclaimed as Ponyville came into sight.
I folded in the wheels and used the levitators to set it down in the middle of the square. Finally here, I pulled down the sign.
Chaos-seed Temporary Species-swap Service is Open!
Of course, the good thing about narrative is that you can intermit all you want and still be there in time to be relevant to the plot.
Twilight had just touched down and talked to Pinkie, who had almost sprinted straight into my shop.
"Who parked their shop right here?!," Pinkie exclaimed as she darted around it to Sugar Cube Corner and I stepped out.
"That's one. Don't mind Pinkie. She's always a bit of a Pinkie, especially when she meets somepony new to Ponyville," I said to Twilight, who was surprised at how I was here.
"What the-?! How are you-?! WHO EVEN ARE YOU?!"
I just chuckled and said, "Twi, you'd be hard pressed to understand Pinkie, and even harder pressed to understand the family of..." At this, trumpets popped up behind me as I shouted for all in the square to hear, "The great and powerful Draconequus, Falak Disc!"
The fanfare of the trumpets just sold the flamboyant air I was trying to-
-Whoa, what-?!
"The Great and Powerful Trrrrixie objects to this use of HER fanfare for YOUR introduction!"
Yeah, yeah, get out and wait for your episode, Trix.
Well, Twilight was still overseer. I just hung around her unless someone rubbed the call lamp in the store. I had just taken some apple products for the road when the first call came in and I was drawn over.
“Welcome to my parlor. We specialize in all manner of applied transfigurative chaos. Please sign the waiver before you select something from the list," I said. The mare, a pale yellow unicorn... with a red mane with a purple and lavender stripe...
"Moondancer, I presume?" Moondancer was surprised I knew her, but she showed me the signed waiver, which read,
This legally notarized document, issued by the Diarchy, states I, the undersigned, agree that Chaos-seed Temporary Species-swap Service is not responsible for any physical, mental, or emotional damages done to myself or any others. The above service is only responsible for facilitating the transformation, while the undersigned are responsible for whatever they do with the knowledge and form provided by the draconequus/chaos mage on duty.
"So, what'll it be, girl?" Moondancer turned to me and said, "I'd like to be a hippogriff, please."
She handed me the bits, and I snapped my fingers, causing her forehooves to turn to the talons of an eagle, two wings sprouting from her back as her horn was exchanged for a crest and her muzzle formed something of a beak. "Stay away from the Storm King if you’re going south, you hear? If you get caught, I set the time-out to warp you back here to the stand."
Moondancer nodded, but before she set out, I added, "Twilight discovered Luna's return, kid. I'm sorry she couldn't come, but..." I summoned Spike's gift, repaired like new. "You should at least have the present Spike was going to bring. If you see her 'round town, let her have it for not coming.”
Moondancer put it in her saddlebag, nodded, spread her wings, and with an eagle screech, flew up to enjoy her 24 hours... before stopping and swooping to where, I noted, Rainbow Dash and Twilight were.
Twilight was stunned.
Rainbow Dash had just cleared the clouds in, as she boasted, ten seconds flat.
Yes, she counted. She also noticed the boast about having caused a big event of linked destiny as a filly with a Sonic Rainboom, but there wasn't any proof of that yet.
Her stupor was interrupted, however, as a creature tackled her from the side. This creature was like nopony she had ever seen. It wasn't a griffon, but it wasn't a pegasus either, having a beak-like muzzle and a feather crest.
And those talons.
By FAUST, those TALONS!
Eventually, she noticed the creature looked familiar. "MOONDANCER?!," she exclaimed, to which the creature nodded and said, "The creature at the stand said you discovered the return of somepony named 'Luna' was imminent when you declined to come to my party. He even gave me Spike's present."
Spike then cut in and said, "Next, decorations at the town hall. Moondancer, you wanna come?"
Moondancer said, "I might as well test out these wings. I do have them for the next 24 hours."
With that, she soared off, Falak rejoining Twilight soon after.
"You know," I said, "it never gets old."
"What does?," Twilight said, confused.
"Well, for one, I ship Sparity hard. For another..."
"...why, Rarity, you are a talent. Now, how can I help yo-Wahaha! Oh my stars, DARLING," Rarity yelled as she got one look at Twilight, "whatever happened to your coiffure?!"
I just smirked and said, "That."
Twilight shot me a look as Rarity dragged her to the Boutique.
"Canterlot?! Oh, I am so envious, the glamor, the sophistication, I have always dreamed of living there!," Rarity droned. I rolled my eyes.
"Don't forget the snobs," I put in, "the racists, the underrepresented racial minorities, my dad in the statue garden, and lastly, the biggest snob that ever snobbed, Celestia's nephew Blueblood."
Rarity was shocked. "What? Ever think of the gunk underneath the shiny glitz? Also, I like the emerald. Same shade as my uncle Scoddri's necklace."
Rarity quickly snapped out of it when she noticed the emeralds I had mentioned. "What was I thinking? Let me get you some rubies!"
It was at that point that Twilight made her daring retreat with Spike and I tagged along.
Fluttershy was pleasant.
She was obviously interested in Spike, but after a bit, she switched over to me and asked me what I was.
I explained my life story briefly, and when we reached the library, I snapped in with Fluttershy and we waited for the inevitable surprise.
“SURPRISE!"
"All the pieces are in this room, Twilight," I said cryptically. "Can you see them too?"
Twilight thought on that, surveying the ponies in the crowd, which included the ponies from earlier today, before shaking her head and returning to her book.
"Oh, open your eyes, bookworm,” I quipped. She turned to glare at me, before noticing five ponies in the crowd illuminated in different colors.
"The Elements of Harmony are Honesty," Applejack lit up at that, "Laughter," Pinkie glowed even pinker, if that was possible, "Loyalty," Rainbow Dash glowed prismatically, "Generosity," Rarity shone like a diamond, "and Kindness." Fluttershy glowed softly and warmly. "After that, it takes a spark of the most powerful magic of all to get the Magic gem."
Twilight then noticed she was dimmer, but still glowing. "Oof, grow your heart, miss Grinch, or the night may just never end."
Twilight took offense to that, at which point I poofed away and waited for the fireworks to die down.
Time for more letters.
Twilight didn't have time to assemble the whole "Zero" script, but what she did have was simple enough to decipher where the holes were.
Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years? * * * * Well, well, well, somepony who remembers me. Then you also know why i'm here. * Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this mo * FOREVER! Muhahahahaha!
If you've begun collecting and assembling this, you have no doubt become curious of Zero. I had known this would * * * * Magic of Friendship. Sunset's failure isn't the end, though; the use of the Element and the Magic of * I packaged an AI in this message, just a little gift from me to help * Enjoy the packaged assistant!
Twilight had researched into how Sunset Shimmer had vanished, how there was no idea on how she vanished into thin air, and then an entirely different but similar girl appears in Canterlot High. Her inclusion in Zero was no coincidence, she thought. Zero involved Equestria. Twilight quickly noticed another piece through the lens, and sucked it up.
Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs?
happen, so allow me to allay your concerns. Zero is simply
Another three pieces in the same space of the message. This time it was her voice addressing the main speaker in this clip.
I did. And I know who you are: You're the mare in the moon - Nightmare Moon!
my way of categorizing the events that will unfold when Sunset Shimmer steals the Element of Magic from our world and our Twilight stops her on the night of the Fall Formal with the
"Okay," Twilight said, "so that makes..."
Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years? Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs? I did. And I know who you are: You're the mare in the moon - Nightmare Moon! Well, well, well, somepony who remembers me. Then you also know why i'm here. * Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this mo * FOREVER! Muhahahahaha!
If you've begun collecting and assembling this, you have no doubt become curious of Zero. I had known this would happen, so allow me to allay your concerns. Zero is simply my way of categorizing the events that will unfold when Sunset Shimmer steals the Element of Magic from our world and our Twilight stops her on the night of the Fall Formal with the Magic of Friendship. Sunset's failure isn't the end, though; the use of the Element and the Magic of * I packaged an AI in this message, just a little gift from me to help * Enjoy the packaged assistant!
After assembling those, Twilight noticed the last two pieces floating behind her.
Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years? Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs? I did. And I know who you are: You're the mare in the moon - Nightmare Moon! Well, well, well, somepony who remembers me. Then you also know why I'm here. You're here to... to... *gulp* Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this moment forth, the night... will last... FOREVER! Muhahahahaha!
If you've begun collecting and assembling this, you have no doubt become curious of Zero. I had known this would happen, so allow me to allay your concerns. Zero is simply my way of categorizing the events that will unfold when Sunset Shimmer steals the Element of Magic from our world and our Twilight stops her on the night of the Fall Formal with the Magic of Friendship. Sunset's failure isn't the end, though; the use of the Element and the Magic of Friendship will cause magic to leak into your world. I packaged an AI in this message, just a little gift from me to help you about in the changing world. Enjoy the packaged assistant!
The tone that said the message was complete seemed higher resolution this time, followed by an array of messages.
MESSAGE ARCHIVED LOADING SPECTRO... A wireframe body started to form over the lens. LOADING CHRONOLOGY ALERTS... An array of digital clocks began to count down, formatting into a file as the next change took hold. REFORMATTING DEVICE TECHNOLOGY...The spectrometer's display started to shift, becoming a touch screen.
”Helloooo, Sci-Twi!," the device suddenly burst out, projecting a more realistic form over the the wireframe. Twilight was shocked at how chipper the small construct was, and examining it closer, were those pony ears on...?
Oh, right. Equestria. "Spectro,” Twilight ordered, “sort messages by immediate relevance and enter sleep mode."
Immediately, Spectro shut off, leaving Twilight to study and ruminate that night.
She was VERY good at multitasking. It was, after all, how she kept her "prized student" status while she sought the answers.
After all, now she REALLY knew there was more that's out there, and she just hadn't found it yet.
Especially her counterpart.
She was surprised when a flash sounded outside her window. She looked outside to see a young boy in mismatched clothes. What really startled her was the two distinct horns on his head. "Ugh, still far too soon to be on this side by chronology’s standards," he muttered, "but... maybe not. I could offer something special to these people in my shop..." When he said that, a market stall appeared next to him, reading-
They get the idea, every time that sign is mentioned, it's going to say the same thing: Chaos-seed Temporary Species-swap Service.
Twilight was intrigued, especially when he removed a tile reading Human: 10 bits from the list and added a tile reading Temporary magic powers: 100 bits in its place.
Wait... magic?
So, Twilight thought, he's the one who created the Spectrodecrypter!
She snapped out of it to see another sign out of the corner of her eye:
Prices are subject to a 1.5x multiplication if undersigned is suspected of being brainwashed, mean, or evil.
Suspicions are usually right, as the merchant on duty knows many things about the future.
Fortune telling is not offered here.
Half off to people under blackmail, undue suspicion, or just being a wallflower.
Family does not receive discounts.
Prices 0.75x if you get a service as a gift for a friend.
Waivers are requisite to be viable for any purchased services from this merchant.
It was at that point the figure noticed Twilight, and waved at her, prompting her to come down.
When she reached the stall, he greeted her with a smile and asked what she wanted.
"After all," he said, "Twilight's still making her way to the Old Castle Ruins.”
She just paid for a day of magic powers after signing, eliciting a chuckle from the merchant as he snapped his fingers.
Twilight noticed the warm sensation flowing through her, and when he lifted a stone, she instinctually, or rather complementarily due to the terms of the service, channeled the sensation around the stone, which she then realized to be a chunk of magic-infused silver, and channeled it through to shape the silver into a crown. She did the same for the aquamarine he held up next, though she noticed he was unnerved when it was shaped into a six-pointed star shape. "What's wrong?," she asked, to which he said, "That reminds me of a world where Twilight got corrupted by plundervines corrupting the Tree of Harmony. She then went on to go on a magic-stealing rampage with them. It's nothing you have to worry about."
Twilight just shook her head and shaped the crown's socket and the gem to an eight-pointed star before putting them together.
"Remember, keep the magic a secret," he warned. "There's a certain trio of girls with heptagonal ruby necklaces that would also crave this power." He then handed her a crystal. "Feed it to Spectro, it'll give you the transpiring events from the other side."
He then snapped his fingers and vanished, stall and all.
Wallflower had seen a crystal appear in front of her at the very same moment Falak had poofed in front of Crystal Prep.
Through it, she saw Twilight trust an orange pony that reminded her of Applejack and fall off a cliff, a yellow winged pony looking like Fluttershy pull a manifested thorn out of the paw of a real living MANTICORE, a white pony that could only be Rarity give her own tail hair to a river serpent, and even an illusion of fear dispelled, oddly, by LAUGHING AT IT.
Wallflower could only marvel at the journey through the wild Everfree Forest, as well as her Magnus Tegmen as it released the latest bee to be drawn in, petals gleaming a pure white from the lack of their nectar coating.
Her musings were interrupted by Amnes, the spirit that led her to the garden, saying, "My master, the one who made me, is near."
Wallflower had been surprised that Amnes had been made by a being of chaos as a constant companion to her, but took it in stride.
Her Brand, the marks that Amnes dwelt in, glew brighter, as he said they would in the presence of magic.
They had been dim due to the lack of magic so far, but now they were glowing brighter. Almost like he was in front of the woods...
Wallflower peeked out, and sure enough, there he was, manning a simple market stall with a green and turquoise banner.
Species swapping sounds nice, make me stand out for the day, Wallflower resolved, and she bought a simple earth pony transfiguration.
It was a bit odd, adjusting to hooves, but the knowledge transfer helped to smooth it over. And she did feel a bit more in tune with the earth. "Just don't pull a Withania Nightshade and go in the flower after growing it to fit a pony or person... Well, that's an idea I can't use. Equus Tegmen ARE known to, well, eat other ponies. Maybe somepony outside our world could make a story like that, though. I know somepony already has. Still," he said, "it's a concept."
Wallflower was confused, but she shook it off as she cantered towards the school, not missing the smirk and mumble of "Maybe I could prank Sunny with this kind of thing..."
Wallflower smiled. That's an idea..., she thought as she watched Rainbow Dash deny the Shadowbolt illusions to tie off the bridge.
Falak then snapped his fingers and left.
"Jeez," I said, "pop away a few hours and suddenly things are going down the tubes."
I had holed up in a tower where neither Luna or the Bearers would be, a gold coupon fashioned in my hand that was good for any high-level transformation or any two moderate transformations.
I bore witness to Twilight redeeming Luna with the true Magic Of Friendship, cut into the scene to give Luna the coupon, then gave Twilight a cryptic clue.
"You know, the Elements may be gems, but the REAL Elements shine in everypony. I reckon that even if they're destroyed, the Magic of Friendship could STILL work up some mean blasts of harmony! After all, you don't need a fancy gem to show that you're the Elements of Harmony perfectly represented! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to write something to lay down some rules on Dad if he ever gets out."
I pulled out a list. "Number one, any form of mind control, compulsion, or otherwise magical method of causing the contenders to act against themselves is prohibited, number two, any form of unicorn magic or flight is forbidden, well that's obvious, number three, any form of temptation to cheat is seen as a forfeit..."
I turned to Twilight. "And my dad is known for his double entendres and false clues."
I then couldn't contain my ecstatic pride anymore. "OOO SWEET FAUST I JUST WANT TO SING SOMETHING SO BAD BUT IT ISN'T TIME FOR THAT SONG YET!"
My chaos powers then created a rift in time to when I could.
"Ooo yes I have waited TWO. BUCKING. SEASONS for the time I would get to sing this! HIT IT!"
Twilight had just passed her test, and I was so ecstatic I just couldn't contain myself anymore! Rarity joined in with me as we began to congratulate Twilight on saving the Crystal Empire.
(Key is Just Me, All,Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie,Fluttershy,Rainbow Dash,Twilight. I am always singing.)
You were prepared to do your best Had what it takes to pass the test All those doubts you can dismiss Turns out you were Prepared for this!
You clearly had just what it takes To pass a test with such high stakes We knew for sure you would prevail Since when does Twilight Sparkle ever fail?
So long I wait to sing for slate That you were sure... (That I was sure...) To save the day, Spike was the way That choice was pure... (The choice was pure)
All those doubts that you can dismiss Trust yourself and you cannot miss Turns out you were...(Turns out I was...) Turns out you were!(Turns out I was...) Turns out you were... Prepared for this!
"Seriously, I was waiting THROUGH THE WHOLE TWO SEASONS TO THIS EPISODE!" I just collapsed. ----------------------------------- "Okay, just... What just happened?," Luna and Twilight chorused as I just laid there.
"Powers shorted out and made a time rift because I was so excited about your first of many adventures and successes and the only song I could think to sing was from the season 3 premiere. It happens. One time when I was frustrated Persona 5 Royal wasn't coming to Switch, an adapted, perfectly functional, all-the-trimmings copy of all the improved Persona games in a cartridge for the Nintendo Switch just popped up right in front of me. The author was feeling about the same when he wrote this in a school kitchen."
Celestia just shook her head and commissioned Twilight to stay in Ponyville to learn more about friendship, but I tuned it out as I explained the coupon to Luna.
She seemed interested in the high-level transformations, especially when it was revealed that one of them was dragon, and another was...
"Changeling Royal? What is this 'Changeling' thou speakest of?"
"Well, my cousin Elytra is one, but not the best example. Think an alicorn, but swap the feathered wings for bug wings, the fur for chitin, and well, in a few days, I heard a royal, Chrysalis, is starving hers and obscuring the benefits of willingly given love. They're all black and half-formed, and only one of them really is nice; the runt of the nymphs, Thorax. His brother Pharynx, though, hoo BOY, is he the ideal changeling warrior! And everyling wants to be a warrior but Thorax."
Celestia said about Chrysalis, how she wasn't all that nice. "Well, maybe she just needs somepony to love her as she is, and trust me, I KNOW the whole Prob-Magic Swamp thing isn't their final form. After all, I have something known as... The Plot. Did you wonder how that unicorn Fizzlepop Berrytwist was relatively unharmed after the encounter with the Ursa Minor?" Celestia realized what I meant, and thanked me for relieving the injury she suffered.
“It was that or she was going to petrify you two, Cadence and Twilight under the name Tempest Shadow to trade your magic for her horn from a manipulative fudgenut known as the Storm King. By the way, the Hippogriffs have had to hide as hippocampi using Novo's Pearl because of that guy." Celestia was surprised at the news, especially that I knew these things. "Please. I was having this broadcast to the world where Sunset and the Sirens found themselves. Hey, Sci-Twi, Wallflower."
Sci-Twi and Wallflower were surprised about their acknowledgement, especially since the display was showing them both the story as Falak was making it and the actual canon series.
Wallflower pranced at being noticeable and noticed, while Sci-Twi just rolled her eyes as she worked on her learning, both mundane and Falak-mandated.
Both of them were excited at the prospects. Twilight in particular had used her magic to make a special device for three odd girls who walked into a bar she was collecting message pieces at. Apparently, by her experiments with magic, it would draw a piece of arcane magic from someone with latent ability and turn it into a sphere of flavored magic energy.
Of course, the magic drain wasn't refined enough for a partial drain, and the magic wasn't supposed to be drained like that, so she got a 75-bit voucher for the 18 remaining hours she had on her time as "warranty payment on the service."
Wallflower, on the other hand, infused a bit of her magic into the flowers around the garden, giving her a lush mystical look to the garden, and she even transferred some of that look to herself with a draping of ivy and flowers!
She met a young girl who said she was a counselor at Camp Everfree, and when her brand glowed, Gloriosa showed her that she could make plants grow because of the crystals on her necklace, though the lack of proximity to a pair of crystals still at her camp limited her.
The two of them left as kindred spirits, though Gloriosa was startled when a coupon for Falak's stand appeared in front of her.
"Enjoy your night of being a hippogriff, Moondancer?," I said, as Moondancer had just finished up.
“Yep! I still can't believe you were right about Twilight!"
I chuckled and replied, "Well, she IS the third mark on the Tree of Harmony." Twilight, who was sitting across from us, couldn't believe it either.
"Well," Moondancer said, "I'd best get back to Canterlot. Keep in touch, okay, Twilight?"
Twilight nodded, and Moondancer left for the train. "Your business definitely seems odd. Who was your uncle that suggested it? On that note, who was your father?"
I just chuckled and said, "If we go to the castle in the future, look for the statue of the singing creature in the statue garden. There may be a small pink filly with a white and purple mane resting next to it. That's my sister, Screwball. My dad and uncles are the same person across many dimensions, as are my aunt and... mother," I spat the last word with all the venom of a black mamba, "though my aunt is the ONLY Cosmos I grant the boon of being recognized as my aunt, on account of being trained in beat-em-up-styled hybrid ranged-melee combat, drained of disharmony, which created the Shadow Wastes dimension and the Blight when I put the reverse-world's Elements of Disharmony into it, and being let within one millimeter of my cousin Draco Robisen as a companion in arms."
Twilight was surprised that my family was so oddly structured, and that my dad could be a statue, but she was more curious about where my mom was.
I just said, "My mom was why Discord got upgraded to menace. She burned a school for the underprivileged, and then he had the Princesses, King Aspen of the Everfree, the king of the Abyssinians, who are cat people, and Queen Novo of the Hippogriffs of Mount Aris seal her into a certain astrological phenomenon."
The three of us left it at that. I think I'll leave the chapter at that too.
So here we are, walking along a path while Spike throws out bad apples. Of course, the motive was a hilarious wager between Applejack and her brother, Big Macintosh.
Of course, our discussion of apples and a stallion in a girdle were interrupted by Spike belching up a letter from the princess. "Oh sweet buck this is going to get real fixed fast with only one extra ticket," I deadpanned, asking Applejack that she at least consult Twilight about the repairs of the barn and the plow before warping over to Sugarcube Corner.
"Hey, Falak!," Pinkie chirped. "What are you in the mood for?”
"Well, I wanted to give you a gift." Pinkie got excited at that, especially when I explained further.
"In one world, you accidentally found yourself in my father's domain, and your creativity and innate ability allowed you to quickly seize control of my father's powers before you were, for your own good, thwarted. That was when I knew it was a good idea to give you this."
I pulled out the World Crystal. "Took my aunt a bit of fortitude to get this away from Death Baker at the Hearth in Arcania. Smash it at your hooves."
Pinkie did, and she found herself in a blank space. The only thing there was a letter that said,
Go wild with the place. Once it's bonded to you, you can use the powers of Chaos in Equestria proper. My dad had a ritual to put a piece of his power into somepony, but I think this will compliment you.
-Falak Disc
P.S: Twilight has a ticket free for the Gala. It is not a party. It is a formal gathering and the Princess says it's always terrible. I don't think you can change that. Maybe you can plan the Hearth's Warming party, that'll be something your vision suits. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Next I went to Fluttershy, tousling her hair while secretly implanting something dormant into her mind and body, something that would fully awaken given the right... spark.
I decided to walk to a spot in the Everfree, digging out an eight-pointed star-shaped pink gem and locking it in an indestructible chest only I could open, sending that and a letter to a place no one knew where it was, to an adventurer with few equals.
Fluttershy was none the wiser, and I left her a letter that read,
Fluttershy,
I have been sleeping, but at the night of the Gala, the night has called me.
In the royal garden, I ask you, when or if you are frustrated the animals do not wish to be your friend, close your eyes and call me out of your soul with the phrase,
I have been sleeping, and the night calls for me.
At least then we can have some form of entertainment.
I will call you out when the Gala has ended. Falak has provided the phrase for me to call upon you as well;
Now I wake, and the day bids me pack.
-Chylene
P.S: I always had a spot for apples, how I could just suck them dry of their juice. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ A.K Yearling was surprised enough to receive a chest and a letter at her home out of thin air. What surprised her more was that it was her real name on the letter.
Dear Daring Do,
The item in this chest is a danger to all Equus. Only I can open it, and it is made to be indestructible. When you aren't busy writing down your adventures, I want you to, under your disguise, meet me in Somnambula, in the desert, and ring the bell at the statue's hooves. I don't have time to talk with you today, as my friends are bickering over a silly ticket for the Gala. The BUCKING Grand Galloping Gala.
Daring wasn't very surprised, but she was still surprised that they would fight over that stuffy formal banquet. She read on,
The power of this item is but one-sixth of my mother. I cannot have this fall into any hooves, for fear of her. She is why my father is regarded as a menace. Guard it from Caballeron, Ahuizotl, and any other foe that you face.
-Falak
Daring Do was an intrepid adventurer, but she was impressed at how the sender of this letter knew where she was from where their friends were. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ When I was back at the farm, Spike had just received the tickets (oddly, there were three,) and I cut in to say, "The princess must really want Twilight there to comfort her if she asked for Twi by name. I pity you and the recipient of that extra ticket."
Spike then read out that I was to attend as well, to which I was surprised, but quickly recovered. "Well, not that I wasn't already planning to, taking a front seat to the action, and my controlled chaos will certainly spice things up!" I turned away and smirked. "Especially with my two surprises..."
Of course, Applejack still wanted to sell apples, to which I said, "Spike, take a letter;"
Dear Princess Celestia,
Applejack, the mare in charge of the food for the Summer Sun Celebration, is interested in attending as a food cart seller.
Since there is already fancy buffet food, I want you to relay this fact to the royal chefs.Hopefully, this message will be able to secure her some orders.
As for the cart, I plan to patronize it for four people; me, my sister, and two friends from across the reflection.
On another note, I think we're all going to have some disappointment with the Gala, especially Twilight.
Still sticking to the rules we set, Falak Disc.
P.S: Say hi to Luna for me.
P.P.S: I may have set up a couple surprises for the Gala with two of Twilight's other friends.
P.P.P.S: Could you also talk to the Wonderbolts? Rainbow Dash wants to attend as well because they'll be there.
Oh yes: Fluttershy's reason is she wants to see the critters in the garden. Could you organize her a tour?
And also: Rarity's reason is she thinks your nephew is actually charming. Please send a letter to her if you can or give her a way to not be just a Ponyville mare in a high-class snobfest like the Gala.
Lastly: I cleared up misconceptions Pinkie may have had about the nature of the Gala. Can you get her in to plan the Hearth's Warming party?
"Okay, I'm done." Spike then sent off the letter, and I started to deconstruct the misconceptions.
"Land sakes," Applejack started, "if I had an apple stand set up, ponies would be chowin' our tasty vittles 'til the cows came home. Do you have any idea how much business I could drum up for Sweet Apple Acres? Why, with all that money, we could do a heap of fixin' up 'round here. We could replace that saggy old roof, and Big Macintosh could replace that saggy old plow, and Granny Smith could replace that saggy old hip. Why, I'd give my left hind leg to go to that gala."
"Well," I started, Freezing Rainbow Dash in the air with a stasis spell, "Not counting the fact that these fancy folk never bought off a cart, the Gala is actually CATERED by the royal kitchens. I had a good word put in with the chefs, and if you go as a businessmare, you should get some good contracts for the farm. Don't worry though; you make a special apple cupcake with Pinkie, and I'll buy it from you, add a special finishing touch, and give it to Prince Blueblood. Not only that, I'll buy as many apple things as you need for Smith's hip, since I have three friends who won't really be attending, per se. And remember, before you want a replacement for something, you ask Twilight if she can fix it up. Okay, Dash can fall now."
As soon as I said that, Dash fell into the conversation and set out her reason.
"This is so awesome," she started. "The Wonderbolts perform at the Grand Galloping Gala every year. I can see it now. Everyone would be watching the sky. Their eyes riveted on the Wonderbolts, but then in would fly Rainbow Dash!" I decided to humor Rainbow's daydream with some faux audience.
[audience gasps]
"I would draw their attention with my Super Speed Strut."
[audience cheers]
"Then, I would mesmerize 'em with my Fantastic Filly Flash. And for my grand finale, the Buccaneer Blaze! The ponies would go wild!"
[ponies go wild]
"The Wonderbolts would insist that my signature moves be incorporated into their routine, and then welcome me as their newest member."
"A-HEM!" I began to start my dismantling. "Yes, it's a very important and spectacular performance..."
"Yup!"
"Requiring very precise split-second choreography and teamwork..."
"You betcha!"
"That would be utterly ruined if one nondescript hot-shot fangirl pony got in the way and threw them off."
At that, Dash realized she had a very big problem with her plan.
"I thought so. Besides, EVERYPONY is gonna want to name-drop or take a picture with the Wonderbolts, and that's why I asked Celestia in that letter to put in a good word for you with them! Besides, Twilight's brother is the Adjutant to the Guard Captain, he's most likely going to marry Twilight's old foalsitter, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, or Cadence, and he's set to become the captain himself, not to mention Twilight is Celestia's personal student, which should give her some court status. Any way anypony slices it, I'm not trying to protect the Gala from ordinary townie ponies. I. Am trying. To defend YOU SIX. From IT!"
I swished a cape, turned around, and left for a nondescript place. ----------------------------------------------------- Of course, Chaos has a weird way.
I should have noticed I left into a door in thin air, and I found myself in front of a red-skinned centaur with a bag, as well as a blonde girl with an amulet.
"Okay, buck this," I said before I employed Chaos Trigger, socked Tirac in the jaw, and sucked all the darkness out of the Rainbow of Dark. "Pleased to meet you, Megan, Firefly, other First Equestrian ponies. I'm not supposed to be in this moment, so don't expect me to bail you out of Catrina, Grogar, Somnambula, the Smooze, or ANYTHING ELSE you are going to face."
I tossed the orb of darkness into a portal to the Shadow Wastes, snapped my fingers, and vanished.
Megan was confused. "What in the world just happened?" ----------------------------------------------------- When I reappeared in my shop (someone rubbed the lamp,) I found myself facing Lyra, who asked for a simple predictable matter; to become a human.
The method was less than typical; a song. You know the one.
I smiled and snapped my fingers, Human Lyra's clothes appearing as hooves turned to extremities. "I gave you the look of the you behind the reflection."
Lyra, as I imagine Celestia was, was confused by the term, "behind the reflection," but I pointed out that in she could see the human world for a day if she paid me ten thousand bits.
"It's a VERY special service, a day in the other world. You understand, I can't have all these doppelgangers popping up. That's why it's much more expensive than the temporary magic service I offer in the human world."
Lyra nodded in understanding, most likely resolving to start up a saving bank, and I headed to where Twilight was.
She was surprised Pinkie hadn't jumped her, and I explained that I had explained the nature of the Gala wasn't conducive to her style of party.
I also added that she was currently soaking up chaon to attain chaos powers of her own. "It's one of the surprises. Besides, she can handle it. Have you seen that mare?"
At that moment, Pinkie somehow pierced time and space to speak to Twilight about it. Through the portal, I could see an assortment of pure Pinkie-style chaos. "See? She can handle it."
She explained that she had two better parties to look forward to; her party for becoming a chaos being, which I luckily knew that since she was made into one and not born one that she wouldn't fade away if denying her chaos, and possibly the Hearth's Warming Party.
At that point, Rarity began her tirade. "The gala? I design ensembles for the gala every year, but I've never had the opportunity to attend. Oh, the society, the culture, the glamour! It's where I truly belong, and where I'm destined to meet... him."
"Him!...," Pinkie cut in. "Who?"
"Him," she clarified, before launching into her fairy tale daydream. "I would stroll through the gala, and everyone would wonder, ‘Who is that mysterious mare?’ They would never guess that I was just a simple pony from little old Ponyville. Why, I would cause such a sensation that I would be invited for an audience with Princess Celestia herself, and the princess would be so taken with the style and elegance that she would introduce me to him, her nephew: the most handsome, eligible unicorn stallion in Canterlot. Our eyes would meet, our hearts would melt. Our courtship would be magnificent. He would ask for my hoof in marriage, and of course I would say, "Yes!" We would have a royal wedding, befitting a princess, which is [giggles] what I would become upon marrying him, the stallion of my dreams. Twilight, I simply cannot believe you would invite Pinkie Pie so she can... party, and prevent me from meeting my true love. How could you? Hmph."
"Okay," I cut forward as it was my chance, "first off, Pinkie is fully briefed on the uptightness of the Gala..."
"Yep!"
"...and second, you expect to find ‘the one’ at a snobfest like the Gala? I've put in a word to get you in a castle suite so that you can test the waters and not be an unknown nopony at the Gala, though I don't know if Celly will act on it. And also? If you think Prince Blueblood, the snob of snobs, is the One, you best get your head checked. He's the biggest jerk in Canterlot, for Faust's sake! Anyways, at least I put in a word for EVERYPONY that Twilight is friends with, including-"
At that moment, Fluttershy and Angel Bunny were set forth, and I listened to Fluttershy talk about why she wanted the ticket. "You see, it's not so much the Grand Galloping Gala as it is the wondrous private gated garden that surrounds the dance. The flowers are said to be the most beautiful and fragrant in all of Equestria. For the night of the gala, and that night alone, would they all be in bloom... and that's just the flora! Don't get me started on the fauna. There's loons and toucans and bitterns, oh my! Hummingbirds that can really hum, and buzzards that can really buzz. White-blue jays, and red jays, and green jays, pink jays and pink flamingos! But then there's the matter of the letter I received..."
I chose to shunt discussion of the letter to the side for the moment to say, "The critters in the gardens are so sheltered, an unknown like you would really startle them. I put in a word with Celly to try and get you a tour of the gardens with a less unknown pony, the gardener, so you have more of a chance at befriending them at the Gala. But anyways, this letter, it contained a pair of key phrases, right?"
Fluttershy nodded, closing her eyes before saying the words. "I have been sleeping, and the night calls for me." As soon as she said it, her wings turned chiropteran, her ears changing as she opened her eyes to reveal they were red.
When she spoke, it seemed to be gruffer, a little annoyed, and a lot more assertive, as well as a little scarier because of the two very prominent fangs. "So you are her friends. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Chylene, but now is not my time."
She closed her eyes and said, "Now I wake, and the day bids me pack," turning back to normal.
Everypony turned to me accusingly. "Yes, it was me. However, Chylene's not fully realized yet. She will be in around four years though. Plus, only Fluttershy can release Chylene."
Of course, they knew I was sincere, and went back to the aggravating discussion of who would be left behind. "Okay, if you can't agree on who or shut the buck up about it in the next five, we might get a little... dangerous with the selection. I'm talking a horde of Blight, newly fed with a First Equestrian Rainbow of Darkness."
Of course, that shut them up.
Then Twilight spoke up, telling Spike to return the tickets, saying, "I couldn't possibly enjoy myself without my best friends there with me, so I would rather not go at all."
"Well, that saves us some time," I said.
"Why?"
"Because now Celestia is sending a ticket for all eight of us."
Sure enough, Spike belched up all seven tickets for me and the girls, then one for himself.
"Well, this is a shorter chapter. Perhaps too short. Yo, Stratus! Pull up the next episode!"
We were interrupted by Spike belching up another ticket, but nonetheless... ----you got it, Applebuck Season it is---- "Look, all Mac and I are saying is that it may be a matter of pride, but you shouldn't be afraid to ask for help. The persons you need but don't want is we!"
I had informed Applejack's friends of her stubborn nature, how she was going to be planning to do the whole orchard herself after Big Mac hurt himself. "Besides, you promised you would help them too, and a friend in need is a friend in deed."
Just then, the stampede hit. "Oh right. The orchard can wait, we got cattle to wrangle." Applejack adjusted her Stetson and ran out with Winona to save Ponyville. "Yee-haw!"
I sighed. "She may be dependable, but she is just too stubborn sometimes."
Luckily, me and Pinkie considered the subsequent "Applejack-is-too-tired-to-be-coherently-useful" debacle a "weapons free" situation, so we were able to salvage the Baked Bads, cushion Rainbow Dash's fall, and curb the bunny stampede before Applejack finally let us help.
Oh, enough about me, let's talk about others. ---------------------------------------------- Adagio and her sisters were happy.
Each of them had received six pills made of pure magic, and they had never been better fed.
Their power was back in full swing too, but only for an hour per pill.
They were hungry, though, and they really got to stir up with the competitive atmosphere of Crystal Preparatory.
Something that Twilight Sparkle was very aware of, and very annoyed at.
She listened to the audio she had accumulated from her message hunting's rewards, keeping her earbuds in constantly.
Finally, though, the Dazzlings were out of steam, and they left for a meager earning. ----------------------------------------------- When I saw Rainbow Dash go flying, I snapped my fingers and manifested a cushion of cotton candy.
While she would be sticky, she thanked me for catching her.
Pinkie trying to stop the Baked Bads led her to use enunciation to make them not be made, and she berated Applejack for the use of worms in cupcakes.
Finally, to stop the stampede, I couldn't see any way other than to turn Winona into stone for an hour. Fluttershy didn't like me, but I just shrugged it off. We draconequui are immune to any sort of mental magic, you know.
Finally, Applejack relented, asked for our help, and to make Celly happy, we didn't use any chaos powers.
To put it into more detail... ------------------------------------------------ The echoing strains of Rainbow Dash's "APPLEJAAAAAAaaaa...." were accentuated by Applejack's "You're welcome!" ------------------------------------------------ "Okay, trajectory, speed, a hint of wind, and Rainbow Dash lands right..." I mumbled as I summoned a cloud of cotton candy at the edge of the balcony.
"AAAAAAA-buh! Thanks, Falak."
"You're welcome." ------------------------------------------------ "Tater chips... a little salty and dry... okey dokey!," Applejack said, at which Pinkie slapped her across the head.
"No, CHO-CO-LATE chips! And could you get me a cup of flour?"
"Sour?"
Smack.
"FLO-UR! Jeez, you're tiring yourself out on that harvest. I see why Falak was organizing us to help you."
Applejack complied to the enunciated letter, and when Pinkie said to get wheat germ and Applejack was about to get worms, it fell to Pinkie to whack a mare before she did anything stupid. "WHEAT. GERM. NOT WORMS. GERM." Applejack was definitely awake a lot longer that time.
This time, the cupcakes were perfect. ------------------------------------------------ "Falak," Fluttershy started, "why did you turn Winona into stone?"
"Fluttershy," I explained, "she would have startled them into a stampede, especially with Applejack's state."
Nevertheless, Applejack insisted she was fine until the very end.
...
Still so short! Let's get Gilda in on this! ----Griffon the Brush Off---- "...so you want me to turn you into a griffon, Rainbow Dash, and you want a gift Pegasus transformation for Gilda?"
She nodded, and I snapped my fingers after she gave me the bits.
Not long after, Gilda flew into my shop. "What did you do to Rainbow Dash?" I explained my services, and Gilda seemed interested when I said I could do it to any creature with the bits.
"...or a gift service lined up, which Rainbow Dash did. Luckily, I didn't have to go find you. Sign here, please."
"Uh, okay?" I snapped my fingers as soon as she had signed, and Gilda turned into a white pegasus with a golden brown mane.
"Enjoy your day on the other side of the friendship." Gilda was gruff and surprised, but she consented, flying off to join Rainbow Dash. I flipped open the Codex Equus Infinitum to collection 15 and started to read.
"This is going to be an interesting day," I said as a background pony filed in to try the service.
Pinkie was busy with her pranking preparations, but I got her to understand that it was hard to reconcile old and new friends.
Speaking of friends... ----------------------------------------------- Wallflower had really flourished, even after her transformation had faded.
She still wasn't a center of attention, but she was receiving a lot of it, especially from Sunset Shimmer, who was surprised at the sight of Wallflower as a pony.
Amnes warned her that she would be a very good friend to all eventually, that it would take time for her to get upgraded from oppressive villain to a hero that was judged for her past deeds, and Wallflower agreed it would take a bit to redeem Sunset in her eyes, much less the school's. ----------------------------------------------- In short, Gilda resolved to keep in touch, the party went much better, and I even managed to catch her just before she left.
"And Gilda, I don't expect you to change, but if you see a pink gem shaped like an eight pointed star anywhere in the hovels formerly known as Griffonstone, you throw it into the Abysmal Abyss and don't show it to anygriff, got it?"
She nodded, as the threat of Cosmos was definitely something she respected my father and the princesses for facing, despite his... eccentricity and past deeds, not to mention she was ashamed at how far the magpie shiny-hoarders once known as the glorious Griffon Kingdom had fallen too. With a mighty screech, she was off.
Of course, I planned a relief effort, entirely put forth by me in an effort to reestablish Griffonstone. The effort for Camp Everfree was going just as well, too. ----incoming message---- "Is this chapter going to include Trixie? It still seems kind of short." ----sure, Boast Busters will get in here too---- Spike with a mustache was dapper and a little funny, but it was finally time for the spectacle of the episode to unfold.
Snips and Snails heard that Trixie was coming into town, and I told them simply, "If she boasts about an Ursa, don't, do not, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF FAUST AND TARTARUS, DON'T TRY TO PROVE HER RIGHT!"
Twilight wondered if I was okay, to which I said, "Oh, yeah, I'm fine but THESE TWO. THESE. TWO. COLTS. How I saw it, they tried to prove Trixie's claim of fighting off an Ursa Major off by actually LURING ONE TO PONYVILLE! They were LUCKY it was a Minor instead."
"Uh, okay-"
"AND THE OTHER SNIPS AND SNAILS, OH, WHERE DO I BUCKING START WITH THE HUMAN ONES? Those two took such a drastic action in ruining the Fall Formal decor, it was being shunted to outside the convergence window! Not only were they delaying you by thirty moons, they were delaying the one who wanted them to create a drastic action. To them, to these two, I. SAY. THAT THERE IS ABSO-BUCKING-LUTELY SUCH A THING AS TOO DRASTIC! Argh! If you guys need me, I'll be beating up the Ahmanet in the Shadow Wastes."
I snapped my fingers, and a pitch-black portal appeared behind me. "PEACE!"
I stormed into the barren landscape, summoning my scythe and ring. "CHAOS TRIGGER!"
I grew to my full form, lunging at the black serpentine figure as it reared up.
"Oh, you got feisty after eating the Rainbow Of Dark! It taste like Skittles?" I threw a punch at it. "I ASKED YOU, DID IT TASTE LIKE BUCKING SKITTLES?!"
Hissss!
"ARRRGH!" We fought into the wastes as the eclipse lay overhead. "NOT ENOUGH DAKKA?! HERE COMES MORE! PRISM MEGIDO! YAAA-!" -----30 Shadow Wastes minutes later----- I flopped into the library, tuckered from the fight. "Okay, I'm ready to face Trixie now." Snips and Snails just gaped in awe that I fought that creature. "What is it, you dummies? Ugh, my head... someone get me a cupcake and a glass of sparkling cider." They appeared, and I partook. "Alright, let's see the stage unicorn do her stage magics..." "Snails?" "Yeah, Snips?" "That guy is scary." "How so?" "Well, he knew who we were and things we may have done, for one, for two, he just fought that thing on his own." "You're right, Snips." ---------------------------------------------- "To be boastful is simply to boast, perhaps to overestimate. I do love the stage magic, though. Here, enter my box." Trixie did, and I set to work sawing Trixie in half. "Ta da!" "Who is the assistant here, draconequus?" "Well, if you want a trick, then execute me."
A gasp from the crowd as I magicked up a guillotine and a bodyshell prison garb.
Trixie helped the bodyshell up, while I slipped under the stage and waited for my cue. "A-any last words?"
"My mom's really going to be mad, you weaver of illu-"
Shnk.
Trixie was mortified about killing me, but I slipped to the front of the crowd and said, "And that, my friends, is how a righteous mare dies."
The crowd and even Trixie were in stunned silence. "Well? Let's hear it for the Mistress of Illusions, the Unicorn of the Stage, the one you all came to see, The Great and Powerful Trixie!"
Trixie was stunned at the trick, not having it in her own repertoire, so I took a moment to whisper it in her ear, as well as the fact that Twilight was being cordial in an effort not to undermine her. "In fact, when she was admitted as Celestia's personal student, she had a magic surge so powerful it grew Spike out of the room and turned her parents into plants."
Trixie lit up at this, proving her skill at manipulating a rope like a snake into curling up an apple and hogtying Applejack, wrapping Rainbow Dash up with her own rainbow, but the last straw was when she messed with Rarity's hair.
"Okay, Twilight may be holding herself back, but I'm sure these two colts," I gestured to Snips and Snails, "will attest to my most powerful spell, correct?"
The two of them spilt the beans about how I faced the Ahmanet, and Trixie was stunned. "I guess it comes from being the son of two of the most powerful Draconequui in millenia."
I just walked off, calling back, "Boasting may make you look good, but boasts are only boasts until you can back them up!"
Snips and Snails then got a glint in their eyes. "I know what you're thinking and you better not-" ----literally 3 minutes later---- "WHAT. DID I SAY. ABOUT LURING AN URSA MINOR. TO THE TOWN?!" Sure enough, the Ursa Minor was rampaging through Ponyville.
I explained to Twilight. "They did it?" "Eeyup." "Okay." Twilight was able to subdue the situation, and just before Trixie left, I said to everyone, "It was the fault of fanatics that this happened. I welcome Trixie and hope that should she come this way again, she doesn't go stir-crazy and use a powerful evil magic artifact to amplify her magic. In fact..."
I turned to Trixie and gave her my most prized possession: a rare Platinum Coupon. "Feel free to take a 24-hour visit to your doppelganger anytime, courtesy of Chaos-Seed Temporary Species-Swap Service."
Trixie thanked me, packing up her wagon and leaving a little more cordially. I couldn't help but sing something.
...But we have to move on and learn from it We can't hold onto hate in our hearts Cause forgiveness will set us free if we let it And I know that soon, it's your time......
Trixie left a little happier than she originally did. I knew we would meet again, too. That's how the plot goes. ----Dragonshy, there's not much to say---- "Remind me to never make Fluttershy angry," I asked Twilight.
"Yup. Hey, wait, don't you Draconequui have an immunity to mental assault?"
"Not like that's everything, though. You should see her in four years when Chylene is fully powered." ------------------------------------------------ Sci-Twi was taking a break from her typical scavenger hunting to have a cordial talk with Shining Armor about what role she would play in the future, and afterwards she reviewed a message.
Apparently, the creator of the Spectrodecryptor had only one fear; a reality-warping entity that turned out to be his mother. She put in her earbuds and her effort was focused by Party Planner Pinkie.
Meanwhile, Wallflower had cultivated a flower of memories with her brand. Anytime you smelled it, you would be reminded of a memory you had lost to the Stone's magic.
The best part is that it didn't have the same three-day limit of the Stone! It did, however, create a mean headache if it wasn't within the limit.
With the Dazzlings, they had been saving eighteen pills they had received from a letter, telling them that all three of them would receive six pills each "season" from the sender.
The flavors of the pills varied, but the three of them rationed out for the season. ----Look Before You Sleep---- Sci-Twi had been invited for a sleepover with the Shadowbolts, to her surprise, and elected to wear her crown, which was enchanted to be unbreakable and that only she could wear it.
She also bought a gift of temporary magic powers for a prize in a sleepover game, and had also taken it as an enchanted waiver that, when signed, would activate the service.
Sugarcoat was skeptical, but Sour seemed both enthusiastic for the game... and of course, very bitter about it.
Sunny admired the crown, and Indigo, the host, was happy to play the game. ------------------------------------------------- Fluttershy actually confronted me about becoming a tree.
I was happy to oblige, but when it didn't exactly turn out how she expected, I was happy to give her a special Gold Ticket.
"After all," I explained, "my uncle offered each of you the first service free in his world. When you meet a friend of mine, I'll give you all another free day service. And you know, you don't have to just get a day. You can pay for extended services too." ------------------------------------------------- Said friend was planning the town that she would make her stand in with Sunburst. She had already learned of the cavern, but she consulted Pinkie's sister Maud just to be sure.
Instead of a communist equalist society, she planned to make ponies better-suited to a situation where their innate ability was removed from them through plain work by separating them from their magic and talent.
In a way, her villainy was toned down by the fact that this was the way of fate. She had already received a letter that Falak wasn't too sure how much he could change the course of the story, so she had a resolve that she would live up to fate's expectations, but on her own terms.
Sunburst had set up a special hypnosis spell that made it look like the same equalism, but under the surface, once her cutie mark was revealed, they would have permission to recover their marks, and the chase would be more of a test that they could use those talents to the same efficiency after being separated so long from them.
"If fate wants me to play the villain, then I'll be the best villain Starlight Glimmer this world has seen!," she resolved. -------------------------------------------------- "Either way," Falak said, "just because I turn somepony into a zebra or a lamia, or just because I'm a draconequus, that doesn't mean I'm any less capable of friendship!"
"Uh," Twilight asked, "what does that have to do with this episode?"
"Well," Pinkie said, "we're doing this in episodic order, so that means we learn the truth about Zecora next."
The reaction was unanimous. "ZECORA?!"
The discussion was cut off by a distinct yell of, "HowdoIsteerthiscrashingohBUUUUCK!," followed by a crash on the balcony.
"Welp, that sounds like a plot device. Probably why we had that extra ticket." I walked out, and saw a gray unicorn colt. That was really where the normalcy ended, for I could spot a slight gradient of purplish-red on his horn.
"Hey, little guy," I said to him. "How did you get here? And, on an unrelated note, who were your parents?"
"Lumensis, son of the tyrannical King Sombra," I ruminated. "The name's Falak, and I'm the son of the draconequus Discord!" I extended my claw, and he shakily took it. The two of us went in, Lumensis curling up while I just stood there.
...
One thing about Draconequui; we can't stand peace, quiet, pure order, and/or NOT DOING ANYTHING!
I just poofed over to a shack in the Everfree Forest, where a very special zebra was waiting for me. "So my role will soon begin/Soon I shall be known within," Zecora said.
I passed her a small vial of flash-bee honey, labelled, "key ingredient for cure to swamp fever," as well as a cut of the bits. "Your snake-oil potions certainly are a hit." ------------------------------------------------- "So, lemme get it straight here," I said. "You want four days as a lamia?" The pink pony in front of me, which turned out to be Diamond Tiara, nodded, handing over the bits and signing the waiver. I got out four vials of potion and mixed them into a jumbo chocolate milkshake. "Drink up quick, kid. The potion works quicker than you'd think, and trust me, you'll know when it starts." She drank as quickly as she could, and was fortunately able to drink it all before the potion began to churn inside her.
When it stopped, she felt a little mad at me, but I just said, "That was just the potion mixing with your magic. Now the change really begins."
Diamond opened her mouth to comment, but couldn't get it out before the green smoke started to pour out of her body, her back hooves turning into a tail and her cutie mark repeating over it. "It's what you paid for, after all. A whole four days as a lamia. Don't worry, your role in the canon doesn't occur for a while."
Diamond slithered off to do whatever she wanted to do with it, and I just sighed. "Another client, another few bits, another controlled kingdom-endorsed chaos." ----Bridle Gossip---- It was a typical Emergence for Zecora; barren streets, locked buildings, and shut blinds.
Except for one building, one that sported a very special sign.
Chaos-seed Temporary Species-swap Service
Proud to carry Snake-oil lamia potions, courtesy of Zecora!
Yep. Mine. Even so, I had moved next to Sugarcube Corner because of one thing.
“She's an-“
SMACK!
"Pinkie, you have chaos powers now," I cut in, "you know that isn't true!"
I went back to my shop when Zecora rubbed the lamp and asked me for a gift lamia transformation for "the first pony who will try/Despite their peers, to meet my eye."
I obliged, handing her the waiver and vial, and she left.
Sure enough, Applebloom slipped out, and I closed up to follow her.
Not like anypony else was going to visit, and Lumensis was still sleeping off his crash into Twilight's home. ---------------------------------------- "Remember, Bloom," I warned, "don't step into the blue flowers."
She nodded, and left to follow Zecora.
Soon after, Applejack asked me where Applebloom had gone, to which I said, "To receive saganoma training, as well as a gift package somepony had me whip up."
I kept her at bay for a bit, but when Fluttershy got involved, I just up and said, "If you want to get after her, look out for fields of bright blue flowers. They may be poison joke, a flower that plays a mean magical trick on you if you walk through them. Also, if you see a giant mushroom or a loose patch of dirt anywhere, you TELL ME."
They nodded, Applejack noting the blue flowers this time when Zecora said her ominous rhyme, and although it was too late to stop them walking through the flowers, the sleepover discussion was noted, and they followed Applebloom and Zecora to the hut, where she pointed out the cure in Supernaturals.
"Again we learn not to judge books by their cover," I snarked as Applebloom signed the waiver and drank the vial. ---------------------------------------- "What in tarnation just happened?," Applejack exclaimed from her new position.
"I consulted Zecora about making lamia potions. To honor where I got the idea, I dubbed them 'snake oil.' The vials are precisely measured to 24-hour doses, and the labels contain all the relevant knowledge, as an insurance for the fact it isn't directly induced."
Seeing Applebloom with a snake tail was one thing.
The fact that the vial was wrapped in what was basically an instruction manual for a lamia's innate hypnotic abilities was another thing.
The fact that Applejack was hanging in her little sister's coils and about to be going under hypnosis? "Well, at least it isn't one of those kinds with a hunger to eat you and turn you into another lamia! I specifically conceded that those kinds of lamias were FOR-BID-DEN to provide."
Applejack expressed her gratitude that nopony would be ravenously devoured and there wouldn't be an outbreak of lamia ponies (especially when I showed her the Moonlight Scales series and the Honeyclaw Series, and when Fluttershy saw them, she went pomf,) but she was cut off by Applebloom testing out her powers.
"Well, these next 24 hours are going to be interesting... Just the way I like it." ---------------------------------------- To everyone's surprise, it was Sour Sweet who nailed the dance and karaoke contest, while it was Sugarcoat who beat out truth-or-dare.
Twilight wasn't shocked at how well the girl could sing This Day Aria, considering the song itself had a certain bipolarity, but she was definitely not expecting the beautifully improvised choreography.
Sour definitely loved making illusions with her magic for the 24 hours. ----Swarm Of the Century---- "So, Pinkie," I asked her, "you got your instruments?"
"Yep!"
"Music sheets?"
"Uh-huh!"
"General Pinkie-ness to hold it all together?"
"Don'tcha know it!"
"I'm just glad Infinitan Rarity was willing to overhaul everything in my cart with tectonium."
Needless to say, it was still something of a mess when Celestia came to town, but it was much better.
"Note to Twilight," I mumbled to myself, "imagine yourself as a siren who can control anypony with a song and see if you have a fetish for controlling others."
Lumensis didn't know what I was talking about, but Twilight definitely did.
Although she had her opinions on the manipulation of mind, I'm not willing, tempted, or otherwise authorized by the Author to explore any sort of fetish in this story. Besides, the setup of this story isn't conducive to mimic THAT story.
Rainbow Dash finally realized what we were talking about, and landed before her wings flared with a small pomf.
Okay, now can we move away from this concept? Please?
I think the chapter's finally long enough. Plus the title has two meanings now!