swirls of sunbeams

by the silent symphony

First published

fluttershy's secret. a pony she knew, drifting into sleep.

who knew the lovely fluttershy would have one pony she kept a secret for too long.
back when twilight first arrived.

he was standing between the aspens and prickly firs of the nearby woods, she is intrigued by his presence, and he is grateful for someone to talk to.

it seemed all so perfect for both of them until that one sun lashed day.

01: sulking_in_shadows

View Online

Walking home through the musky leaves of he surrounding forest, fluttershy stepped side-to-side to avoid the newly-formed puddles of crystal rain after that had fallen that afternoon, no pony wants wet hooves unless they plan them to get wet, tracking mud into a household is never any fun.

She was walking at a somewhat slower pace, taking in the scenery, even though she had seen it a dozen over 178 times before or so. She had no rush, all the animals she knew about that had injuries were cured or recovering which was all she really wanted in her life. The sun was setting, rays of gold were peeking through the sparse autumn leaves, striking the ground and setting it alight with color, for the sun does such marvelous things to an ordinary object, even more marvelous with a pony.

A splash

“Oh no..” fluttershy gave a small sigh, she wasn’t looking where she was going and has clumsily stepped into a pool of water, although this made her stop, and now that the sounds of her own footsteps had been silenced and she was presented with the sounds of the forest, she heard a quiet scratching, a clawing, like a stone on the creases of wood.

She looked through a small wall of forage and greenery, accidentally shaking a few spiders off their webs and onto their backs. There was a small clearing, only around 4 feet in length around, like one had trampled it for quite a long while from coming there often, preventing the soil from producing new plant life; in the clearing lay a completely pink pony, his mane looked like it had been torn out, his hooves had shown the ware of travel, and his stature was very slouched as if in some physical or mental state was exhausted.

“Hello there” fluttershy spoke out, not wishing to eavesdrop or spy, she stepped closer to the clearing.

The pony snapped his head around in a startled manner, stood up, and locked eyes with fluttershy.

She could now see his eyes. She was pierced by the hauntingly beautiful stare, above the bags and creases of sleepless nights, the pony’s pupils were almost completely black, it seemed to be staring into a void of something that is so foreign that tugs at you and makes you want to know more.

They stared at each other for what was probably more then 2 seconds, but it felt like a never-ending eternity for fluttershy, she felt paralyzed while looking at this pony, bound by an invisible machine. Unable to move, and just barely getting by with involuntary breathing, it seemed as if the world had frozen over and she was the last one left conscious.

She gazed at his face until he finally turned and fled through the thicket.

She had been set free, she didn’t know what came over her, what was it about him? He was just a normal pony, she hadn’t seen him before, but she didn’t really know everypony in ponyville either. She convinced herself it was just an awkward encounter with just a random pony, but somewhere in her subconscious she couldn’t stop wondering what was in the depths of those black eyes.

But her facade shrugged it off, she decided to finish the short distance home then rather then idling, and so she did.

She passed pinkie pie’s bakery and bought a raspberry scone, she always delighted in the ever-sweet taste of the pastries that pinkie-pie made, and she liked helping out her friend as well.

She dropped her small pouch of medical supplies onto the cold yet clean floor, crumbs from the previous goodies were shook off as she walked inside. The sun was soon to make the mountains its resting place, shedding its final rays of red glory for warning to the occupants of what it was leaving behind. Fluttershy knew that the birds would be home soon, they had been trained to, she loved sleeping with the cute critters upon her roof, they were the nicest neighbors she could ask for, and soon enough, the flapping of wings of which every color imaginable came to the canopy of leaves and overgrown shingles that had infested her house.

Fluttershy bid each and every one of them goodnight, a long process that took a toll physically on her, but not mntally, for she needed them each to know that they had her undying affection. By the time this [process had finished, the sun had completely left the sky and had let the moon take dominion of the slys, spreading its stars like kittle kingdons of white that teinkled as if hoping they’re not alone.

Fluttershy rested on he bed, she knew that the release of sleep would soon sweep her into the midst of abstract dreams, hopefully of animals and the forest, but until then she rested her eyes on the clock, a ticking machine that never rested, like a heart, it kept beating.

The clock was such an intricate monstrosity, its short, clicking sounds bounced across the wooden floor and up the walls, it became more and more quiet as the room became darker in fluttershy’s perception, she did wish for cute and soothing dreams, but her subconscious was lingering, lingering on something she had seen, and something so plain and ordinary that it could not be harmful at all, or threatening even, did she have a nightmare? He next day she would not have been able to tell, for the conjurings of ones own mind are the biggest mystery unsolved.

Somewhere, a pony was crying. His tears barely scraping the ground but lashing at the thin ties of his arms more and more. He had one last vinyl record, he put it on his gramophone, it belonged to his grandfather, the horn was bent out of shape from the unfortunate treading of the owners.

He put the needle down, it picked away at the dusty disc until it started playing faint cello harmonics, it was the only thing soothing left for him. He wanted to be nothing, he wanted nothing, he wanted silence, he wanted a bombardment of sounds.

A crow landed on a piece of board jutting from the frail shelter he had made himself, it laughed.

02: a_confrontation

View Online

A shrill whistle pierced the ears of Fluttershy.

"Uhm.. Hang on one second.." Fluttershy stammered

The birds stopped their harmonious song and peered down at their director as she slowly took a few steps forward.

"Uh.. I think we have a flat note somewhere.." she paused and looked at a tall red feathered friend, "Terrance, i think you need to blow air faster to get a higher sound. Its not bad, but lets start from the beginning."

The red bird nodded and the chorus perched in a more straight posture, beginning the melody again. A leaf gently shook, and the small area by the forest was momentarily filled with sweet vibrations, giving Fluttershy a feeling of home.

She needed to get the song perfect for the Summer Solstice Celebration, Princess Celestia, out of so many, had chosen her to provide the music, it was her responsibility, but with the pace this was going, it should be perfection in no time. She was so proud of her friends, such sweet and small creatures, they brought her joy every day she spent with them.


Fluttershy arrived at the pond, the water was so crystal and still, reflections mimicked the true nature of the surroundings. She could see herself as she drew nearer to the edge of the water. She threw in a tiny pebble--a ripple formed, disturbing the serene image on the surface. For a second her face was distorted, showing not herself but a more hideous pony, it went back to normal after a short while.

There was but one dock, it stretched a few feet out over the pond, and on the end there stood a fishing canoe, prepped with fishing tackle and two oars.

On the dock sat a pony.

A pony?

Fluttershy jumped and let out a minuscule yelp before covering her mouth with her hoof. She had not seen a pony there, actually, she was almost certain that she had seen that dock empty a few seconds ago. She heard nothing, he just appeared, like a ghost in the night.

And Fluttershy heard nothing now, not even breathing, and she had sensitive ears.

It was the pony she had seen the previous day.

She wanted to run, but she didn't.

She wanted to say hello but she couldn't bring herself to face him.

A crying, a tearing, a screaming, she stood still. Frozen in wonder and fear, she knew nothing about this pony, what would she say, should she say anything? Why is he so intriguing? What is the story behind those black eyes?

Her hoof took a step forward, shy did she do that? A flurry of thoughts rushed into the mind of Fluttershy, she begged her hooves to stop as they slowly carried her closer to the silent stranger on the docks.

"H-hello?" Fluttershy stammered through that single word, and immediately regretted it.

The pony's ears perked up, he slowly turned his head around and locked eyes with Fluttershy once again. But instead of fleeing, he stood up in an apologetic manner, lowering his head.

"Hi.." He said in a hushed tone, scraping the wooden planks beneath with his hooves.

"Whats.. Uh... Whats your name?" Fluttershy said, avoided his eyes to not make it anymore awkward then it already was, but she wanted to look at them so badly, a feeling that she had never experienced before, it was bewildering.

"...I'm Hem." He reluctantly said

"H-hi, I'm Fluttershy, its very nice to meet you." She greeted.

"I'm sorry for running away yesterday, I sometimes kind of freak out when I'm near.. Ponies." Hem apologized, tilting his head downwards.

"Oh that's perfectly fine.." Fluttershy assured, "I freak out.. Too. I'm sorry that I stared, I don't think I've seen you before."

"I just moved in a few days ago," Hem replied, "I just don't live in any of the houses, I'm in a bit of a rough spot.. Financially."

"Oh no, where DO you live then?"

"For right now, under the bridge closest to the Everfree forest, but I don't mind it"

"You don't?"

"No, its actually probably the best place I've had to live for a while, its very warm here to I don't really need to have any walls."

A small bird flew past them both and Fluttershy suddenly was aware of the time, she had forgotten that she had promised her toucan that she would sing him to sleep.

"I'm so sorry, I've forgot, but i need to be somewhere right now.." She apologized

"Oh that's okay.." Hem answered

"It was very lovely to speak with you." Fluttershy turned back towards the path that led to her home, but then looked back, she hesitated, "..will i see you again?"

"If you wish," Hem replied, "I'm always at the bridge at seven in the morning."

"Okay."

She was exited, why? This wasn't natural.


Fluttershy had a vivid dream that night; she stood in a black void of nothingness, the only thing here was her, Hem, and a shallow layer of water that wetted their hooves. She stared deep into the dark pupils of Hem--they were overflowing with life yet so distant and estranged, a somewhat sleepiness seemed to be about him, and his head drooped.

She reached out to him.

His head snapped up. He grabbed her hoof, his grip was as strong as steel and as cold as ice. A feeling of terror was going through her and her mane froze over, turning a light yet piercing blue.

face it face it face it face it.

A rambling mutterings of virtues and morals skiterred through her head as his eyes --previously full of life--were now drained and were like a void of nothingness, sucking in her soul. It was blacker then black, so dark that their surroundings were nothing compared, it was like staring into the jaws of an unearthly entity.

He tilted his head and suddenly twisted his joint inward, snapping the bone of Fluttershy's front leg.

A screaming.

A bone pierced through the he skin and blood rushed like a river.

He let go.

She woke up, she was pale and so cold that the room shivered. It was night. Nothing was wrong. She laid back down.

03: tomato_sandwiches

View Online

Fluttershy held out a picnic basket, made from woven straw and with a blue checkered blanket covering it.

"I thought you might want some breakfast." She said offering Hem the basket of food.

"Oh thank you," Hem said gratefully, "You didn't have to, I usually get by with the wild berries in Everfree."

"You go into the Everfree forest?" Fluttershy marvelled.

"Yeah.." Hem took the basket opened the blankets and started to pull out the various contents, "sandwiches, I haven't had one of these in a while, but I really enjoy them."

"The local reputation of the Everfree forest is kind of ... negative," Fluttershy continiued, "there are ghost stories about ponies who never came back after entering.."

"Oh, well so far I've seen nothing out of the ordinary." Hem assured as he neatly folded the checkered blanket back.

Fluttershy watched him as he organized the food on a napkin, he was a novelty--to Fluttershy at least--his hair seemed like it was cut with a piece of broken glass, it hung ragged and loose over his neck and forehead. She had noticed that his cutie mark was what looked like thorns, or perhaps claws.

Hem noticed her staring and they both awkwardly turned their faces away.

"So.." Hem began, "Fluttershy, what do you do for a living?"

"I, uh.. I work with animals, and various other things.." Fluttershy trailed off.

"Animals, that sounds exiting."

"It can be at times, haha.. but its more calming for me."

"I see, that's.. that's very nice.." Hem picked up one of the two sandwiches and handed it out to Fluttershy, "here, have one."

"Oh, no, I made them for you." Fluttershy objected

"Come now, you should have one, you made them after all," Hem convinced, "I cant eat by myself, I feel gluttonous."

Fluttershy eventually gave in, and they began to eat breakfast while counting the fish that swam by in the stream. After a while she finally started to look around at the make-shift home of Hem's;

There were a few loose boards propped up for something that resembled a wall, there was one leaf-covered blanket that was winkled and stained from years of use, it sat in the corner next to a small metal pale and a broken gramophone.

The smooth water was softly flowing, with a sweet scent of lilys and orange blossoms, there was colorful water grass that had grown there and was taking rest in the shade of the bridge.

"This place looks quite lonely.." Fluttershy observed, "you could always stay at my house, I bet its a lot more comfortable."

"Thank you for the offer, but I'm quite fine," Hem declined, "Plus there would be such gossip of a scandal."

"I guess so," Fluttershy said, why did she ask that in the first place? It was very hasty, she wasn't hasty.

"Well.. tell me about your day." Hem said attentively.

"There's not much to it really.." Fluttershy replied, "Before i made breakfast and came down here, I went to do more practice with my birds, we were doing fine, but then this pony came up, she was a nice shade of violet with a pink stripe in her otherwise purple hair, she frightened away all the birds--they are very shy you know--but it was pretty much the end of the lesson anyways so I wont need them until this evening."

"That didn't seem very nice.."

"Yes but it happens to everyone, plus she had a baby dragon, he was very cute and it kept me busy for a few minutes."

"ah.."
` Fluttershy paused, the sun was almost halfway to the keystone of the sky, it looked down upon the green hills and cast swirls of sunbeams gently through the sparse clouds.

"I will have to go in a minute, to prepare for the Summer Solstice Celebration." She said wearily.

"That's fine, you've made my day already, its nice to have someone to talk to.." Hem stood up and put the remains of breakfast back into the basket.

"Before I go.." Fluttershy said, "..may I listen to some music off your gramophone?"

"Sure thing," Hem answered, "Its kind of in tatters, it was my great-grandfathers, but it still works."

He turned the horn of the machine towards them and set a black, round disc on the wheel, he then slowly lowered the needle to the surface.

A small hiss and popping was heard for a minute, but it cleared out into what sounded like a piano played in an empty cathedral, reverb was drenching the pristine and slightly detuned notes, making the sweet melody have an isolated feeling.

They listened in silence.

Fluttershy looked at Hem's eyes and was sucked in once again. A statue of salt next to Sodom. What were those eyes, what were they?

She suddenly had a an image, that flashed on the screen of her mind for a second, but only a second, and was gone. It was of her dream she had the previous night, except he had turned blue, as if covered in a sheet of ice and snow. His eyes were hollow.

04: cessation_of_daylight

View Online

Hem awoke.

It was night.

The skies were still shrouded in darkness, stars shone between the gaps of the billowing clouds.

He still remembered Fluttershy's last words before she left him the previous day;

"If you ever need anywhere to rest, you're welcome at my cottage, but I'll be back tomorrow."

He wanted to go and be welcomed into a household for the first time in what seemed like forever, although he did not desire to seem hasty nor pushy, he was always taught to live and be content with what he had.

He drifted to sleep but no sooner had he shut his eyes then they were open again, he felt completely rested and as if it were morning, yet the moon was in the crest of the sky and the inky blackness beckoned him to his resting place.

He decided to go for a midnight stroll, clearing his mind, maybe pick a few of the wild berries for tomorrow's breakfast so he didn't have to get up too early. He picked up his pale and started to take a leisurely walk over the dusty roads to Everfree.

Coming to where the road was less worn, the bare patches merely sprinkled the ground as the foliage and grass took over, having a lush and inviting color of green, the forest seemed to peaceful.

A rain started to lightly drop, puddles were slowly formed on the roads, turning the dry dirt to soft mud that crept around Hem's hooves as he traversed the ever-decaying path.

He found the berry bushed he usually picked from, and he picked a few, he noticed that a few had begun to wither, which was odd, since it was so early in the year. A red glint caught his eye and he looked upwards to see a great patch of ripe berries further in the crook of the woods. He didn't remember seeing these before but he was glad to take some and put them in his pale.

But when He turned around, facing the direction he started, the thicket was gone, and so was the path.

gone.

Hem had a shudder creep down him spine, this didn't make any sort of sense, he turned in circles until he was dizzy, searching for a sight of the path. None revealed itself and it seemed as if the forest was rapidly changing its form what it was a few seconds before.

He started to trot in the direction he thought was correct, but he did not find any familiar trees or markings. In fact he saw the forest somehow get darker, even the roof of leaves and the black sky couldn't have made it get quite so black.

Gone was the boredom and restfulness, in came a small panic which if let festering could consume one's mind.

A crow dropped dead in front of Hem, stopping his short gallop, he looked up, and saw a hole in the leaves, only the crescent moon shining through, yet giving no light for being able to see.

The crow looked as if it had been bitten by a pony's teeth, the gnashing must have shredded the feathers and crushed the ribs, broken fragments of bone impaling the organs. It's beak was pried open in an expression of fear.

Hem of course did not notice most of these things, he was trying to see through the muddying atmosphere that had made smaug of a swap that was a choking fume.

He kept running, stopping, then turning around, but no matter where he went, he could not re-trace his steps or find a lighter way, it kept getting darker.

He could no longer see where he was placing his hooves, they landed in damp mud and moss, slipping on wetted rocks and thumping an occasional tree root. He sis no slow down or stop, neither did his breathing or his quick eye movements, frantically searching for another ray of light to find refuge in.

clattering collapsing blanket of sticks and splinters flying.

All topped and was quiet.

Hem was falling.

He hoped he would land in a pool of water or a blanket of grass in those brief moments of silence and dread that he had whilst plummeting.

His hope was vain, as he heard a sharp crack in his front leg. His head smashed into a sharp rock, not having the mercy of killing him or knocking him unconscious, but keeping him alive to suffer the agonizing pain and the aftermath.

The pain wasn't sudden, there was a moment of numbness before it shot through his nerves.

It was immeasurable.

He needed to scream but instead a soft whisper came forth, the shrieking in his mind was not tamed though.

break

Hem lay at the bottom of a cliff, small bugs had already begun to gnaw at his open wounds.

He finally saw the end of the forest.

With a shocking of all his skin and the stinging electricity coursing through his skull, Hem stood up. He had 3 working legs, enough to carry him. He could barely hold the weight of his head anymore.

And in an instant; a shock wave of harmonious elements was sent through the sky.

Day had come.

05: definition_of_her

View Online

Fluttershy was in anguish.

7 days ago she had returned from her quest with Twilight Sparkle with the Elements of Harmony, she came back to visit Hem and tell him about everything. She found 18 dead birds scattered around his bridge, 18 of HER birds. They had died from the teeth of a pony, her friends were spread about the bridge where Hem once lived, he was gone.

Of course she was skeptical at first, but after those 7 days with no sign of Hem coming back and nobody knowing what happened, she was driven to her mind's end.

She had nightmares of Hem every night, biting into the flesh of all her birds and ripping them apart with his hooves, stomping their remains into the ground.

That night she lay down on her bed, dreary of sleep--having buries the last of the birds earlier that day--she feared o go to sleep for she knew mos certainly that there would be Hem in the dark abyss, ready to torment her once again, but her eyelids begged for the unconsciousness.

An ever-decreasing fight for sight she battled. Every tick of the clock, every swing of the brass pendulum cranked her sight of vision slightly smaller until the darkness swallowed her and she descended.

She was in her house.

It was most definitely a dream, she knew for certain. All the colors had drained, and a gray husk was left in its place.

Hem was there. Behind the door. Knocking.

"Please let me in!" He pleaded, "Fluttershy its me!"

"No!" Fluttershy shrunk into the corner

"Why?"

"You killed my birds!"

"Let me in!"

The knocking and knocking and knocking and knocking and knocking and knocking.

"There's a beast that's come from the woods." Hem tried to explain, "He's coming for me, please let me in."

"There is no beast!" Fluttershy rejected

"He is there! I'm not making this up, please.. open the door."

"I cant risk anything, you...you.. you took-"

"OPEN THE DOOR!"

The slamming of hooves on wooden door increasing, pounding the ears of Fluttershy into her skull. Reverberating shocks of agony.

"PLEASE."

There was a scrambling of frantic pounding and again more knocking. the walls were shouting with sirens of fault and the windows were collapsing.

A deafening roar was heard for a split second before Fluttershy was awoken from her slumber.

Awoken by a knock.

Only a small knock. As if the knocker was frail or simply could not knock loud enough as needed.

"..who is it?" Fluttershy asked meekly, still recovering from her dream encounter.

"H.." a voice started, then took a sharp inhale, "its..hem."

Fluttershy's pupils dilated, a fever of sweat and nausea immediately took her. Her bright fur turning the pale white of a ghost.

The quiet night turned to a bristling darkness, the smooth moonbeams turned to sour and ragged streams of light seeping through the windows.

"What do you want?" Fluttershy pleaded, was she still in a dream? usually she knew when she was sleeping, and this felt all-too real, she shouldn't be sure.

"Please, let me in," Hem asked in an exhausted voice, "I'm injured, its taken me all day to get from the forest to here, I've had to crawl in between the limping."

"You didn't seem to care about those birds injuries!" Fluttershy found herself in a raised tone, one she often could not force herself to have.

Hem assumed she was talking about the dead crow in the forest;

"The dead bird? I-I don't know what happened to it."

"So you do know about it."

"Please.. I can barely stand-"

"Your just going to come into my life once again," Fluttershy had grown into an increasingly frantic state, "And then what, kill all my friends then leave again?"

"I only left for the night, Fluttershy, whats gotten into you?"

"You've been gone for seven days! And you've been in my dreams since the first day i saw you, terrorizing me to my minds end, go away."

"No, I don't think i c-can walk tha-" Hem's words trailed off.

Fluttershy looked down at the floor where she was cowarding, a pool of tears had formed at her feet, she looked into the reflection to see her face.

"..you've been the only one who cares!" Hem shouted, and there was a thud as if he had fell against the door, "I've.. been s-so.. cold.."

Fluttershy still looked at her own reflection, a tear splashed into the surface, making her face distorted and ghastly.

This isn't you this isn't you this isn't you

She finally got hold of some of her sense, and looked up. The night had turned to morning, it was strange for it had been no more then an hour since she had laid down to sleep.

The night was silent again, the slumber of the trees and peaceful light had returned once again, and she slowly made her way to the front door.

Hem had stopped talking, she couldn't even hear him. The knocking had stopped.

"I'll let you in.." FLuttershy called out, "but you mustn't be violent."

She unlatched the door, and very slowly it swung open.

On the welcome mat lay Hem.

His body beaten and broken, a bone stuck from his leg, dried blood soaked his skin and his pink shade had turned to pale except for the blood stains which were dark.

But his eyes.

They were no longer the dark mysterious eyes of the warm Hem.

They were the eyes she had seen in her dreams.

Dead and lifeless.

Desolate.