A Precarious Predicament
Lightning Dust had a plan.
Lightning Dust usually had a plan. All of her life was devoted to one plan or another, even if said plan was simply ‘Be the best pegasus that ever took wing.’ Not many ponies would credit her with thinking through her actions (which, admittedly, she didn’t), but she could at least think through the first step of a plan, and decide to wing it from there. Or at least, figure out a way to wing it, but that was an entirely separate plan from the first one, and it received about as much thought. Anything more involved too much thinking for a high-flying free spirit like her.
And it was one such plan that left her in her marefriend’s house one afternoon with a bow, a length of green ribbon, and the tiniest sliver of an idea on how to celebrate their anniversary together.
Lightning let herself in with the key she knew her marefriend hid under a definitely-not-conspicuous cloud she placed just a few feet from her front door. The great house was empty, as she knew it would be for another hour or so; with work and practice, there usually wasn’t anypony home during the afternoons. But her marefriend got off of practice at four, and that left Lightning a good hour to get her surprise ready. It was going to be a night neither would forget, and she’d make sure of that. At least, that was step one of one of her plan, its beginning and its end. And all she’d need would be a length of ribbon and a bow.
But first, Lightning decided that she could use a shot before she got down to business, so she immediately went to her marefriend’s kitchen and dug out a plain shot glass and a handle of tequila. The handle glugged and bubbled as she poured out a shot, and she wrapped her green feathers around the glass, tossing it back without a second thought. The alcohol burned and tingled as she swallowed it without giving her body a chance to realize what she was doing to it, and she immediately coughed once it caught up with her. Grimacing, Lightning looked at the handle and empty shot glass in front of her, and another idea wormed its way into her brain. What was one shot but a warm up, and the second but a tasting? She lived her whole life fast and hard, and some part of her mind convinced her that only taking one meant she was only half the mare she thought she was. So she took two more to prove herself otherwise, and a fourth just because she could.
Ego thus satisfied, Lightning grimaced at the burn of alcohol turning her inside-out from the back of her throat to the pit of her stomach. Maybe four shots of tequila was a bad idea, but she knew she’d be preoccupied for the next hour or so until her marefriend came back, and she wasn’t about to pass that time sober if she could help it. She considered taking a fifth shot only because she had stopped at four, and if she really wanted to impress the imaginary ponies judging her, she should take another just to prove she could. But the rational part decided against that, considering what she still had left to accomplish.
Belly full of fire, Lightning tottered to her marefriend’s bedroom, ready to set up her surprise. The mare she loved had a huge bed, and she definitely loved that bed; it held good memories of nights well spent, and it was certainly a lot larger than the pathetic twin she slept on in her own apartment. Flopping down onto it, Lightning sighed as the soft cumulus bedding seemed to leech the aches and pains out of her bones. She was half tempted to catch a quick nap, but she knew if she did that, she wouldn’t have time to set up her surprise. So instead, she slotted the spool of green ribbon between her feathers, set the bow aside, and contemplated how to make things work.
And that was where she ran into a problem: making this whole thing work was definitely a second step to her plan, and she’d only thought about the first one thus far. Frowning at the length of ribbon, Lightning pulled the end out with her teeth as far as she could reach, and draped it across her shoulders. Should she do it like this? She wasn’t sure. But she’d certainly seen the pics of pretty mares trussed up in fanciful ribbon in Playcolt magazines and figured it couldn’t be that hard. Once she got this whole ribbon thing figured out, she’d make the perfect anniversary gift for her marefriend when she finally got back from practice.
More ribbon spooled out from between Lightning’s feathers, and she began to roll on the bed as she tried to work the end across her shoulders and to the other side of the body. More and more ribbon she kicked out of the spool, wrapping it this way and that, crossing her legs and her torso in fanciful green lace. Her mind formed a pretty picture of just how sexy she knew she had to look, and she wrapped another length across her hock and over her wings for good measure. The spool ran out, clattering off her wings onto the ground, and she hummed to herself in accomplishment. What a present her marefriend would have to open when she got home!
With the ribbon exhausted, all that remained was the bow, and Lightning set her sights on it as it rested on the nightstand. Chuckling to herself, she tried to reach for it with a hoof—only to realize that hoof was hopelessly entangled with her other legs, and she couldn’t move it very far at all. “What the… really?” she growled at herself, trying to untangle herself just the slightest bit to grab the bow, but all six of her limbs seemed hopelessly stuck to her body. She frowned down at the green ribbon wrapping this way and that, a loop even caught around her forehead, and growled at it as if that would encourage it to let go. But she soon realized she could hardly move an inch, so thoroughly trapped was she. Somehow, while rolling about on the bed, she’d gotten the loose ends of the ribbon pinned up against her, practically knotted for how stuck they were, and she didn’t see a way out.
Lightning glared at the elusive bow remaining just so far out of her reach. “…Great,” she grumbled, trying once more to free herself, only to no avail. She simply bounced and rocked the bed beneath her, unable to break free. But her mind churned through a million plans a minute, trying to find a way to undo the mess she found herself in…
She was still wriggling about an hour later when she heard the door open and shut, and she was no closer to freeing herself than she had been when she’d started. In fact, she somehow had made it worse, and she’d ended up on her back, unable to break free of her little green tormentor. “Celestia damn it!” she cursed as she contemplated simply breaking the ribbon, only for the finely woven fabric proving much more stubborn than she had originally gave it credit for. Unfortunately for her, her little curse had caught the attention of the mare who had just entered, and the beat of hoofsteps on cloud tile floors suddenly ceased.
All was quiet for a moment, with Lightning too afraid to move lest she bring more attention to herself. But finally, the sound of hoofsteps returned once more—this time coming toward the bedroom. “Dusty?” a voice asked from somewhere down the hallway, and Lightning cursed again. “Are you here? What are you doing in my bed—!”
Rainbow Dash peeked through the doorframe to her bedroom, eyes wide with surprise. Lightning Dust simply blinked at her, unmoving and nearly as still as a statue. Both pegasi stared at each other in surprise, until Lightning Dust cracked an uncomfortable smile and twitched her tangled legs against the invincible ribbon. “Happy anniversary, Rainbow…”
The Wonderbolt immediately put a wing to her face, though it didn’t take long for her to double over in laughter. Lightning simply lay there, stupid grin on her muzzle, while her marefriend buckled over in cackling laughter. Finally, however, Rainbow managed to suppress her snickering for just long enough to look up at Lightning from the floor. “LD… Dusty… what the hell is this?”
Lightning just maintained that stupid smile, unsure of what else to do. “…your anniversary present?”
Rainbow laughed again at that and managed to stand upright. “My anniversary present? Oh, I see now.” She walked over to the side of the bed and poked Lightning on the nose, turning her awkward smile into a pouty frown. “When do I get to try it out?”
“Now, if you like,” Lightning said. “I’d love to get this ribbon off of me.”
“Oh, I didn’t say anything about that,” and this time it was Rainbow’s turn to grin at her. “I think you’re perfect just as you are.”
“Gee, thanks.”
The bed shook as Rainbow hopped onto it, peering down at her bound up present and stifling another giggle. Lightning felt hooves on her flanks, and her cheeks burned rosy red. “I really gotta say, LD, you went above and beyond this year. I didn’t expect this at all.”
“Shut up,” Lightning grumbled. “It worked better in my head.”
“I’m sure it did,” Rainbow said with a giggle, and she leaned over and pecked the green mare’s cheek. “But I couldn’t ask for a better present than this.”
Lightning sighed. “How much to make sure this never leaves your bedroom?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” Rainbow said, winking at her. “I’m sure we could figure something out. Happy anniversary.”
“Yeah… happy anniversary.”
And then they kissed, Rainbow teasingly toying with her still-wrapped gift.