The Super Sneaky Thieving Pony

by Discorded SheepcityUSA

First published

The Mane Six come into conflict with master thief Slinky Sly (who bears a striking resemblance to Pinkie) and her band of fellow criminals after the group robs Prince Blueblood. Despite their criminal antics, they'll find they're not all bad.

After a band of thieves collectively known as Payback infiltrates the Grand Galloping Gala and robs Prince Blueblood, the Mane Six look into them so they might help bring them to justice.

But through their research, they find that the situation is not so simple. They find that Payback has never once targeted an innocent pony. Everypony they've stolen from had skeletons in their closets next to their piles of dirty money that they stepped on many ponies to get. Going off this pattern of behavior, it would seem that this band of thieves have noble intentions despite their objectively criminal activity. What stands out to them the most though is the center of the entire operation; Payback's leader, Slinky Sly...

Who shockingly looks nearly identical to Pinkie.


Violence tag for various fight that will likely get pretty brutal later on and Sex tag is for Slinky just being herself

Cover Art by Little Tigress

Chapter 1: Rainboom

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“No no no for Celestia’s sake I said PINK lemonade you idiot!” the white unicorn with a gold mane wearing an obscene amount of expensive-looking jewelry on her person screamed at one of her unicorn servants in a shrill voice. On this day in Equestria’s capital city of Canterlot, many of the wealthy that lived in town were hosting their own garden parties. This one in particular was being hosted by the unicorn mare, Gold Mine, who’s only real talent as far as anypony who knew her knew, was miraculously managing to reel in a rich husband no matter how many times she divorced.

Or perhaps her true talent lied in something to do with her lungs because judging from her interactions with her servants, the mare could screech like nopony else. Of course, she would never display such behavior in front of her guests. In private however, Gold Mine was a menace. The cause of her anger this time being that the lemonade was not pink at her garden party where all the décor was pink.

In her anger, Gold splashed the glass of lemonade she was holding in her servant’s face and hung the empty cup from his horn as he wore a completely neutral expression on his face. He should be more upset, but behavior of this sort was so common from her that he could not find it in him to be shocked.

“See to it that you fix this, now,” she huffed as she turned her servant away, only for another one, this one holding a rake in her magic from doing yard work, to trot up alongside her, seemingly walking on eggshells.

“Erm…ma’am…there’s somepony at the gate wishing to see you. It’s um…it’s a filly,” she said with some hesitation.

Gold, looking slightly annoyed, made her way over to the garden’s currently-locked gate, grabbing the rake from her servant and dragging it behind her with her own magic. Sure enough, there was an Earth Pony filly, about 10 years old or so, standing on the other side. Her pink fur and dark pink, straight mane had a few strands of hair sticking from it and were stained with dirt, indicating she hadn’t had a proper bath in a while, and her flank bore no cutie mark. The filly looked up at her with her pair of large, pleading blue eyes.

Gold Mine recoiled a bit in disgust at the state the filly’s appearance was in. “Eeugh…speak. I am very busy today, girl,”

“Um…excuse me miss Gold Mine?” the filly asked, seemingly nervous. “My name’s Slinky and me and my brothers don’t have a real home. We’re very hungry so…” she continued, looking past Gold Mine and eyeing the snack table in the garden that had various small party foods, causing Slinky to drool a bit.

“Forget it girl,” Gold Mine snapped. “I have an image to keep up here, do you have any idea how having a dirty street rat among my guests would make me look?”

Slinky’s ears folded back, and she had a dejected, upset look on her face. “I-I’m…sure nopony’d judge you for helping a starving filly out,”

“The answer is no. Should I let you in here every urchin in town would be swarming my home for a handout,” Gold Mine reached over the fence with her rake and swatted in Slinky’s direction. “I’ve got guests coming any moment now and I do not want to see mane or tail of you here when they arrive. Now shoo!”

Appearing to be frightened with a few tears in her eyes, Slinky galloped off out of Gold Mine’s sight. The unicorn mare exhaled in annoyance. “Honestly. Go back to the orphanage where your ilk will leave me alone,” she said bitterly to herself as she went back to her preparations.

Little did she realize that despite her no longer being visible, Slinky had not truly left. Instead, she had made her way behind a nearby flower cart parked next to the sidewalk across the street and just sat on her haunches, sadly looking at the ground with tears in her eyes, eventually covering them in some attempt to keep her tears inside. Everything Slinky said was the truth. She had brothers waiting on her without any food left and no money to speak of to help in that regard. Gold Mine was the eighth pony today to turn her away when she needed help, and she could not go back to her brothers empty-hoofed; they already hadn’t had a proper meal in two days...her and ONE of her brothers hadn’t anyway. Her little body shook as her frustration began to boil over into anger. She took her hooves off her eyes and glared down into a puddle next to her showing her reflection where she was able to see the condition her fur was in, and her quiet rage began to flare. All of this fuss because she was a little bit dirty?

“So…that’s how it is, huh?” Slinky growled to herself. She then made her way back to her hooves and peeked out from behind the cart back at the garden, and the growling in her stomach strengthened her resolve for what she was about to do next. Priority one was food, but she had had enough of Canterlot’s apathy toward her plight today. Slinky was not going to let Gold Mine come out of this unscathed after that especially gross display of selfishness.

When Slinky was eyeing up the garden again from behind the cart, she noticed Gold Mine’s guests approaching the gate, and took special notice of one mare overcompensating way too hard with her dress being humongous.

Perhaps even big enough for a small filly to hide under, if careful enough.


“Oh, I’m ever so sorry to hear your husband won’t be joining us this afternoon dear,” One of Gold Mine’s guests, a yellow Pegasus wearing purple eyeshadow and a pink sunhat, said to her.

Meanwhile much of the hostility Gold Mine had shown earlier had dissipated now that she was in the presence of ponies whose opinions she actually valued. She shook her head. “Tsk tsk. Yes, I’m afraid the poor thing came down with Hay Fever. The weather was just not agreeing with that nose of his today,”

Gold Mine lied as easily as she drew breath. All her servants knew better though. Truthfully her husband just did not wish to be in her presence.

The yellow mare was about to continue their conversation when all of a sudden, she felt a sudden gust of air zoom by them and heard the sound of a distressed mare from behind them.

“Oh my!” the nearby purple mare wearing the oversized dress exclaimed, her dress having flown up suddenly due to the strange sudden gust of air passing under her. She quickly scrambled to pull it back down. “I’m so sorry, I did not expect the wind to be so strong today,”

“Darling what are you so embarrassed for? We do not even wear clothes all that often,” the yellow mare couldn’t help but giggle a little.

Gold Mine however, did not have it in her to laugh. “Hm. Odd. I don’t recall the weather team having excessive wind scheduled for today…ah, it doesn’t matter,” she said, dismissively shaking her head and instead choosing to keep her focus on keeping her guests entertained. “One moment, I’m feeling a slight peckish. I will fetch us some hors d'oeuvres,” she said as she turned her back to the yellow mare and toward the snack table…

And recoiled in horror when the entire table was now completely barren. Even the pink tablecloth was gone.

“W-What in the world?! What happened here?! Where did all the food go?!” She yelled, her façade of civility beginning to crack a little. Just as she was shooting a few accusatory glances at some of her nearby servants, her attention was quickly drawn elsewhere when she heard the horrified gasps of her guests behind her.

“O-Oh my goodness!” the yellow pegasus exclaimed with a blush on her face as she stared at the back of Gold Mine’s head. The purple mare with the oversized dress meanwhile had no words and simply fainted.

Gold Mine, quickly trying to keep her mask on, quickly composed herself and turned back to them with something resembling a smile. “I-I’m so sorry everypony, truly I don’t know what happened. I had our snack table perfect not but a moment ago, I swear!”

Meanwhile, one of her servants had spied something stuck to the back of her head and approached her, speaking with a hint of dread in his voice. “U-Um, ma’am…I don’t think that’s what caught their attention…” he said as he pulled it off her and held it in front of her face to see.

When she saw what it was, Gold Mine gawked at it and shook her head, having to blink a few times, not even able to believe what she was seeing.

Having been taped to the back of her head was a piece of paper with a certain profane, four-letter word starting with the letter “C”

And that is when the façade fell.

In her blind rage, her face had turned a dark red, her pupils had dilated, and she was snorting hot air from her nostrils. But she could not even think about how she looked. She took the paper from her servant and viciously shredded it with her teeth. Her anger had still not subsided so she then, without even thinking, took her rage out on the empty table and flipped it over before finally just letting out a furious scream. “AAAAGH! WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?! WHO FUCKING DARES?!?!” she yelled.

Just then, she would get her answer as right in the corner of her eye, she’d caught a quick glimpse of Slinky sneaking out from behind a rose bush and bolting out of the front gate, carrying the stolen food in her mouth by forming a sack with the pink tablecloth.

“RRRGH! That rotten little brat, of course!” Gold Mine then turned to one of her servants who was still in shock over seeing her throw such a bad tantrum. “WELL?! DON’T JUST SIT THERE AND STARE, FLAG DOWN A GUARD, TELL THEM I WAS ROBBED!”

“Y-Yes ma’am,” he stuttered before quickly trotting off as fast as he could.

With the situation now seemingly being handled, only then did Gold Mine start to come down from the height of her anger. The problem was, now that she had a slightly clearer head, a sense of dread started to grow in her chest once she realized what she had just done. Right out in public.

With this realization, she slowly turned back toward all her party guests who by this point were nothing short of speechless. They all just stared at her as if she were a mare possessed with their mouths hanging open in shock.

“Erm…I…Oh dear…” Gold Mine muttered, failing to find her words.

Little did anypony realize, the commotion had been seen by another. High on the rooftop of a house across the street, an adult, pony-like figure was looking through a pair of binoculars at the entire scene from afar.

“Well well, looks like she really got under that gold digger’s skin,” the figure said to herself in a mature, feminine voice, lowering the binoculars. “Thieves are just getting younger and younger these days,”


“For Celestia’s sake kid, stop running!” a royal pegasus guard shouted as he ran alongside his partner through the busy streets of Canterlot after Slinky. Inwardly, Slinky cursed herself for not getting out of there sooner. Unfortunately sticking around to catch a glimpse of Gold Mine’s breakdown before she made a break for it proved to be too tempting a prospect for her. A mistake she’d come to regret if she didn’t keep moving.

“Yeah relax, we’re not going to hurt you, we just want to talk!” the other guard, an earth pony, shouted as they gave chase.

“Bullffhit!” the filly swore through her teeth as she gripped the bag in her mouth and barged through a crowd of tourist ponies, knocking a few onto their haunches in the process causing them to shout her way in outrage. But she did not pay them any mind. If these guards were anything like the rest of Canterlot, and in Slinky’s mind that was a near-certainty, their concern was not real. If she got caught, she would likely be sent to juvie, or worse, back to the orphanage. Never, ever again.

Not to mention what would happen to her brothers should she not make it.

In her desperation to lose the guards, she tried taking a shortcut in an alley between a boutique and a coffee shop. But to her distress, the alley was blocked off halfway by a chain-link fence that stood tall above her head. She turned around to find another route but waiting at the other end of the alley where the two guards that had finally managed to close their distance. Her heart nearly pounding out of her chest in fear, she backed up against the fence, gritting her teeth that held the sack of food and intensely glaring at the two of them like she was a cornered animal.

“Easy, easy,” the pegasus said, holding up a hoof in a fruitless attempt to calm her down as the two of them approached.

“We know you’re probably pretty scared right now,” The earth pony started. “But frankly I think the best thing we can do for you is to get you off the streets. So why don’t you just come with us and we can-“

BOOOOOOOOM

The guards stopped dead in their tracks once the sound of what sounded like an explosion rang out throughout Canterlot, their eyes darting around to find the source. Following the boom, an enormous ring of rainbow light spread across the sky, illuminating the city with all its bright, beautiful colors. The guards, and everypony else that was touring the city streets had all stopped whatever it was they were doing to stare up in awe at the marvelous sight. This included Slinky; so entranced by it that she, if only for a moment, forgot all about the situation she was in and all the hardship that she’d been saddled with.

She was quickly brought back down to Equestria though by, ironically, an equally bizarre event happening almost immediately after this Rainboom. For just across the street, was the exam hall of Celestia’s School for gifted unicorns…

And an enormous purple dragon’s head erupted from its roof, looking around with an expression as if there were not a single thought in its head.

This sight, obviously, distressed the guards. “WHAT IN CELESTIA’S MANE?!” The Earth Pony guard yelled in fright.

“D-D-Dragon!” the Pegasus also yelled.

Slinky, while initially frightened by the appearance of a dragon in the city, could not afford to be paralyzed with fear. The guards were distracted, and she knew she would likely not be granted another chance. She quickly tossed her sack over the fence and with all her strength, scaled it as fast as she could. Eventually she made it to the other side, scooped up her sack again, and bolted out of the guard’s sight.

The Earth Pony one briefly looked behind him, but by the time he noticed Slinky was getting away, it was too late. “H-Hey wait!” he shouted.

His now very nervous Pegasus partner grabbed his shoulder to stop him. “Dude forget it! There’s a freakin’ dragon in the city! Wherever she’s going’s better than right here right now. We must get to the exam hall, NOW!”


Out of breath, Slinky made it to her alleyway on the outskirts of Canterlot that she’d called home for the time being and dropped the sack at her hooves and instead chose to drag it across the ground inside the alley. The alley smelled nothing short of unbearable, but it was all Slinky and her brothers could manage at the moment to minimize risk of being spotted and her being hauled back to the orphanage, and who-knows-what being done to her brothers.

She called into the darkness of the alley for her brothers as she made her way inside. “Fluffy! Jade! I’m back! Get out here ya dorks,”

Almost right away, Slinky could hear 2 pairs of hoofsteps and one pair of feet making their way closer to her. When their owners stepped into the light of day, Slinky, despite her exhaustion, couldn’t help but smile a little bit. In front of her stepped a young yellow pegasus colt with a brown mane wearing a pair of cheap-looking glasses, and a scrawny diamond dog of the bulldog breed that barely stood at Slinky’s eye-level, with grey fur and brown eyes wearing a vest made of sewn-together rags.

The colt was clearly distressed for obvious reasons. “S-Slinky what in Tartarus happened out there?! There was this loud boom sound, the whole freakin’ sky lit up all rainbow-y a-and,”

Slinky cut him off by putting a hoof over his mouth to make him shut up. “Jade. I don’t know. I don’t care. It stopped. We’re all still alive. And it was even kind of pretty. Chill,” she said, deadpanning a little bit and looking him over. “And stop with this phony look. Doesn’t seem like anypony followed me for miles. You’re good. Nopony will see you,”

Jade had a nervous look in his eyes but with quiet resignation, he nodded. Afterwards, Jade’s figure was quickly engulfed in a flash of green flames. Once they dissipated, in his place was one of a black, insect and equine-like species known to ponykind as a changeling. Jade quickly readjusted his glasses after returning to his natural form and pushed them up against his dark purple eyes. “B-Better?” he stammered.

“Better,” Slinky said with a smile. She then turned her attention to the Diamond Dog. “How’ve you been holding up Fluffy?”

She got her answer when Fluffy’s stomach made a long, growling sound, causing him to hold his stomach. “Mmmmn….hungry,” Fluffy whimpered.

“Awww I know buddy,” She said, patting his stomach. “Don’t worry, I got you covered,”

Slinky quickly untied the knot on the sack and let fall open. Inside was the entire supply of hors d'oeuvres from Gold Mine’s garden party. Cheese sandwiches, various kinds of fruit and small cakes made up Slinky’s haul from her heist. After quickly shoving a cheese sandwich in her mouth, she then took a one and held it up to Fluffy.

“I know it’s not meat like you really SHOULD be eating Fluffy, but we have to work with what we’ve got right now. Sorry,” Slinky said. Fluffy seemed to be too hungry to care as he quickly devoured the sandwich whole, having also ended up with Slinky’s hoof in his mouth.

“Mmm. No be sorry, cheese is good!” Fluffy said with Slinky’s hoof still stuck in his mouth.

“Eeech, dude…” Slinky grimaced, freeing her hoof and using Fluffy’s vest to clean it. “Okaaay that was gross. But anyhow Fluffy, I think it’s about time we fed Jaaaaaade~” She said, her head turning to Jade with the biggest smile on her face. Fluffy did much of the same along with his round spiked tail wagging.

Jade meanwhile, blushed in embarrassment. “Nnngh, y-you don’t have to guys, I’m not-“ Jade was interrupted by both Slinky and Fluffy hugging the changeling tightly.

“Shhhhhh. I get this embarrasses you, but you need love to live. Now don’t complain,” Slinky said, a faint pink mist emanating off her and trailing into Jade’s mouth.

“Feel love Jade,” Fluffy added as the same began to happen with him.

As he fed off the sibling love he received from Slinky and Fluffy, Jade was clearly feeling its warmth, having calmed his nerves a little and just allowing himself to be given its strength. Eventually, he had his fill and pushed the two of them off him so he would not overindulge and take too much from them.

“Aaah…really don’t know what I would do without you two,” Jade smiled at Slinky and Fluffy before casting his vision down to the pile of food before them that the pony and diamond dog were snacking on. “Gotta say, impressed you managed to get this much Slinky. Who woulda thought Canterlot ponies were this generous?”

Slinky’s eyes shot open, and she stopped chewing the moment that left Jade’s mouth. “Eheh…well…”

Jade’s smile dropped and he raised an eyebrow, growing suspicious. “Uh…this was…GIVEN to you right?” Jade asked.

Slinky couldn’t find it in herself to speak up still. Her eyes darted all over the place, wanting to look at anything but Jade and Fluffy right now, and she began to sweat a little.

“Slinky,” Fluffy said with narrowed eyes. “Slinky, what did you do?”

At that point, Slinky finally cracked, and she groaned, putting her hoof to her face and turning her head to the sky. “Okaaay. I might’ve…helped myself,”

Jade’s glasses fell down his face a bit, looking a lot more nervous. “So, you mean you stole it? Don’t…don’t ponies not usually like it when you take things from them? A-Are we going to get in trouble? Isn’t this…wrong?”

Slinky took her hoof off her face and gave Jade a stern look. “You didn’t see what I saw. Nopony in Canterlot wants to help us. I was a step away from digging in the trash if that last pony wasn’t so awful,”

“Pony…awful? Why? What wrong with her? Fluffy asked, frowning.

Slinky growled as she thought about her encounter with Gold Mine. “Oh, don’t get me started on Gold Mine. Almost looked like she was mad she had to even talk to dirty little street urchin me, shooed me away with a rake like I was a dog, treated all her servants really bad. Got me so fired up that I gave her what she deserved. Stole all her food and embarrassed the heck out of her in front of everypony she knew,” Slinky said, her anger simmering down and now seeming to smile a little more and almost laughed after remembering the mare's reaction. “Hehheh…you should’ve seen it, I got her good,”

Jade pushed his glasses back up still looking worried. “Mmn…guess I can’t feel too bad for her if she was like that but…wasn’t it like…you know…scary?”

“Y’know…” Slinky said, pawing at the ground with her hoof in thought. “It should’ve been but…it wasn’t, really. All I could really think about was getting you guys food and how mad I was. I mean I almost got caught by some guards and that got me pretty freaked but...but now that I think about it…I liked it. Gold Mine is a bad pony. She doesn’t deserve all the money she has. So, getting to screw her over while being able to help you guys? It felt good. I felt like I was…alive,” she said with her smile growing even more.

Just then, a light emanated from Slinky’s flank, causing Fluffy and Jade to wince a bit. Once the light had died down, they just stared in amazement for several seconds. Slinky had also been caught off guard by the light, so when it finally dimmed, she glanced down at her flank and gasped in amazement.

Where her flank had been blank before, now sat Slinky’s cutie mark: One yellow diamond with two blue diamonds on either side of it.

After simply staring at it in utter disbelief for a few seconds, Slinky’s smile grew wider than Fluffy or Jade had ever seen it and she squealed in delight. “EEEEEEEEE!” Slinky bounced up and down and hugged her brothers tightly. “EEHEHEEE I GOT MY CUTIE MARK, OHMYGOSH OHMYGOSH I GOT MY CUTIE MARK!”

“GACK!” Jade gagged as Slinky hugged him slightly too tight. “C-Congrats Slinky but…t-tight.”

Fluffy meanwhile was not nearly as bothered as he still had it in him to smile. “Yay for Slinky!” Fluffy cheered, patting Slinky’s head.

It wasn’t for a few more seconds that something dawned on Slinky and all of a sudden stopped hugging them and looked a bit confused. “Hang on…I don’t remember doing anything with jewels today. Why’s my cutie mark look like that?”

“They aren’t always literal,”

The three kids jumped at the sound of the feminine voice that startled them. They looked up to the rooftop overlooking the alley where they heard it and shook in fear of the figure they saw standing on it. On the rooftop stood an adult mare with light red fur wearing a dark red trench coat and a long-rimmed hat of matching color, with a long auburn mane flowing down her shoulder. In a display of athleticism not seen from an earth pony by the kids, the mare jumped down from the roof and hopped from wall to wall of the alley until she reached the ground, her hooves splashing a puddle of water.

Jade had already brought his colt disguise back up with the appearance of this new pony and stood behind Fluffy, terrified. “S-Slinky I thought you said you weren’t followed!”

“I-I thought I wasn’t! I don’t even know who this is!” Slinky said defensively, stammering a bit.

Fluffy meanwhile had gotten on all fours and crouched close to the ground in a fighting stance, ready to pounce at a moment’s notice “ARF ARF ARF RRRARF!” he barked.

The mare pushed her hat up so the three of them could see her steel-grey eyes unobscured and paid Fluffy’s barking little mind. “Cutie marks are not always literal of one’s talents in their imagery. Considering your little stunt at Gold Mine’s and your newfound reverence for the art of thievery, that’s likely what your cutie mark is referring to. Just so happens jewels and treasure are usually associated with that craft,”

Slinky’s ears folded back a bit at the revelation, and she looked nervous. “Y-You saw that?”

The mare nodded. “You don’t need to be nervous. Nopony is looking for you. After that display caused by that Sonic Rainboom, those guards have certainly forgotten all about you,”

“S…Sonic…Rainboom?” Jade asked, tilting his head a bit, still nervous over the new pony but curious, nonetheless.

“An event where a pegasus reaches such speed that they break both the sound and light barriers resulting in…well you saw earlier. I’d always thought they were just theoretical, but it seems somepony out there’s proven me wrong,” the mare said, looking at the sky.

“O-Oh. She’s smart,” Jade said to himself, looking impressed.

The mare’s eyes shifted to Jade. “You can drop the disguise by the way. I already know you’re a changeling. You don’t seem like the type to kidnap ponies and drain the love of their family, so I don’t mind,”

Jade nervously looked at Slinky. At this point, they had no reason to hide it so Slinky gave him a quick nod, prompting him to hesitantly revert to his natural form.

“That’s better,” the mare said, then turning her attention back to Slinky. “Okay, my little criminal-“

“Look,” Slinky began, trying her hardest to look stern. “If you’re here to tell me stealing’s wrong or whatever, I don’t wanna hear it. I…” Slinky stopped for a moment to steel her nerves before she continued. “I’m not a bad filly,”

“Never said you were,” The mare said, holding up her hoof. “You do fit the definition of a criminal; you did break the law by taking something that didn’t belong to you after all. But, in my experience, ‘criminal’ is a neutral term. You can either be a good one, or a bad one. I wouldn’t sit here and try to lecture you about if stealing is inherently wrong regardless of who the victim is. If I did…well…”

The mare stopped to reach into her trench coat, which briefly caused the kids to flinch, though they calmed down when they saw it was just a piece of paper.

“If I did, I would be a MASSIVE hypocrite,” she said, holding the paper out for Slinky to see. Fluffy and Jade gathered around to get a look for themselves, and all their eyes lit up in shock when they saw what was on it.

It was a photo of the mare distorted by her movement, indicating whoever took the picture couldn’t get one of her standing still and that this was likely taken on the fly. And sitting below her photo were the words:

WANTED FOR GRAND LARCENY: SCARLET. INFORMATION LEADING TO ARREST WILL BE REWARDED WITH 300,000 BITS UPON CAPTURE

The kids stared at the wanted poster in wide-eyed amazement, though Fluffy looked more confused than anything. He took his eyes off it to look back up at the mare they now knew as Scarlet. “What does…’grand larceny’ mean?” he asked.

“Theft of personal property above a certain value. She’s a thief,” Jade answered.

Scarlet nodded. “I was actually scouting out Gold Mine’s home myself when I saw your little garden party heist,” she said, with a slight smile on her face.

“YOU’RE Scarlet?! Gosh, I’ve heard a lot about you. Word on the street is you’re like the greatest master thief to ever live! Heck, I heard some ponies thought you were just like…a ghost that steals gold or something you’re so sneaky!” Slinky said, thoroughly impressed.

“My reputation precedes me it seems. But that is an exaggeration,” Scarlet said, a small chuckle escaping her mouth.

“But gosh…” Slinky continued, looking back at the wanted poster in her hooves. “300,000 bits, who the heck did you piss off?”

“Lot of ponies. Some real rotten to the core folks that tend to fit in pretty cozy in high society that make screwing over the less fortunate their hobby. So that huge reward…well, you don’t get into this business without making some powerful enemies, and it’s not like law enforcement cares for the ‘why’ I do this. At the end of the day, I'm still a criminal,” Scarlet said, leaning against the brick wall of the building on the left of the alley.

“Well guess I can see why you’d wanna hit Gold Mine then heheh,” Slinky snickered. “But uh…I have a question. Why’d you follow me at all? We’re nocreatures,”

“Because” Scarlet replied, looking down at her. “I could tell this wouldn’t be the last time you’d try something like that. Starving kid just found an easier way to feed themselves and got away with it, why would you stop? And that cutie mark of yours only confirmed my suspicions. I’d never tell a pony not to embrace their destiny, but if you’re going to keep doing this, you’re going to need some guidance. This line of work can get pretty dangerous,”

“Are…you saying what I think you’re saying?” Slinky asked, a few sparkles appearing in her eyes.

“I am,” Scarlet said, kneeling to the filly’s eye level. “I know I am not going to be able to do this forever. But my work is too important for it to end with me. I need to start thinking about what is going to happen to creatures like the three of you that get trampled on by ponies like Gold Mine once I can no longer do this. And I think you have a lot of potential to be a great candidate for my successor. Train under me, and I can help you hone your skill to become an incredible master thief like me. You’ll be able to take down those that need it several pegs and help a lot of ponies like you,”

Scarlet then stood back up. “But I won’t lie to you. This is going to involve a lot of moving around from city to city, don’t forget that law enforcement is not exactly appreciative of ponies like us. Society at large will still shun you. That is unlikely to change. This a relatively thankless job, but it’s one that needs doing. Think hard about this,”

To say that Slinky was immensely tempted to go through with this would be an understatement. She did just get her cutie mark in this talent after all and would love nothing more than to bring more ponies that abuse their wealth and status to justice and give their victims a chance at something greater. But there was one problem.

“I…unless Fluffy and Jade can come with me, then no deal,” Slinky said, puffing out her chest.

Scarlet smiled a little bit. “I would never ask you to be without your brothers. They may,” Scarlet responded, looking behind Slinky at Fluffy and Jade. “Are the two of you for this? I might be able to help the two of you pick up on some latent abilities yourselves,”

“I get help Slinky? I come too!” Fluffy said enthusiastically raising his arms in the air, Scarlet taking some note of his slightly broken speech and to get the Diamond Dog some homeschooling.

“Good, good. I’ve got some contacts in Griffonstone that will make it easier to get the nutrition a tough, growing little pup like you needs,” Scarlet, patting Fluffy’s head, eliciting a tail wag from him.

Jade meanwhile, was more hesitant. “Mmmn, oh gosh…I dunno, this all sounds kind of dangerous,”

“It might be,” Scarlet said. “But by the end of your training, there will not be many that will be a serious threat to you. I get the sense you’re a smart little Changeling. The mind is arguably the most important part of a thief’s skillset and can get one out of plenty of bad situations. If you let me help you learn how to use it to your benefit, the three of you will be nigh-unstoppable together,”

“Gggggh,” Jade held his head. “Well, when you put it like that…okay. I’m in too,”

“Lovely,” Scarlet said, patting Jade’s head as well, causing him to blush in embarrassment a little bit. “First order of business is getting you three out of this dump. This is no place for children to live. I’ve got a lot of hideouts around Equestria so we’ll be staying at this cabin down the mountain tonight,”

“So…do we get to have an actual bed? Slinky asked with a hopeful look in her eyes.

“Of course,” Scarlet replied. Right away, the three now-teary-eyed kids swarmed her and hugged her legs, throwing her off guard. “O-Oh um…are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah we just…can’t remember the last time we had a real bed is all,” Jade said, pushing his glasses out of the way to wipe a few tears from his eyes.

“Piiiiiillooooows,” Fluffy hummed, his tail wagging some more.

“There there children,” Scarlet said, giving them a hug back. “You know Slinky, usually when ponies their cutie marks, they will make some kind of change to their name to reflect their newfound talents. Did you have one in mind if anything?”

Wiping tears out of her own eyes, Slinky thought for a moment. She’d called herself Slinky for so long that she didn’t feel like that part of her name should change now. But maybe an addition to it was in order now that she’d discovered a liking for thievery.

“Hmm…Sly,” She decided. “My name is Slinky Sly,”

“Slinky Sly. Graceful and cunning. It suits you,” Scarlet said as she smiled down at her new apprentice.

Chapter 2: Pinkie Bi

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CANTERLOT; 15 YEARS LATER

“Woo yeah, go Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash shouted to Pinkie while sitting at the open bar and holding a mug of cider in her hoof; a blush forming on her face due to all the alcohol she’d already consumed tonight.

“Thanks Dashie!” Pinkie shouted back as she somehow managed to break dance despite her frilly light pink dress.

Ordinarily the Grand Galloping Gala would be a pretty boring affair for the average pony. It was really an exclusive event moreso fitted to the taste of Equestria’s elite than anypony else. Recently though, with the attendance of Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends things had changed…for better or for worse. The last few Galas have had some disasters occur that put the event into nothing short of chaos, sure, but at the very least one could not call them boring.

And tonight, if Pinkie’s momentum kept up, it would appear that this year would follow the trend. Because tonight, the mare was in full party animal mode. She looked like she’d had no less than fifteen cupcakes before arriving tonight as she bounced all around the dance floor in the energetic and cheerful manner one would usually expect from Pinkie. She’d acted similarly the first time she’d ever been to the Gala, but by now she and her friends had saved the kingdom so many times that none of the nobles had the nerve to scold her like they did back then. The mare had simply accrued too much clout.

Eventually, Pinkie managed to tire herself out and she decided to take a quick rest, bowing to the ponies watching her. Knowing better than to correct Pinkie’s etiquette by now, all the ponies clapped their hooves as she trotted off. Pinkie then made her way to the bar where Rainbow sat and took the stool next to her, wiping some sweat from her brow.

“Phew. Gosh, I’m really going at it super DUPER hard tonight. This is fun!” Pinkie said with a big smile, despite her exhaustion.

“I’ll say. I haven’t seen you turn it up that hard in a while. You were killing it,” Dash said as she took a sip of her cider.

“Heehee. I guess the last few times we’ve been to the Gala I haven’t REALLY gotten to enjoy myself, so I wanted to make it count. And look, everypony’s seeming way nicer this time around!” Pinkie said, waving at the various noble ponies that were watching her earlier, who all gave her a sheepish grin as they waved at her.

“Heh. Guess that’s a way of lookin’ at it,” Rainbow said, knowing the real reason behind their lack of hostility but not wanting to ruin Pinkie’s fun.

“Heeeey!” Pinkie said, turning back to Rainbow. “You wanna come out there and dance with me? Pleaaaaaase?” she asked with a wide-eyed and grinned expression.

“Aaagh, y’know I would Pinkie but…not gonna lie, I’ve already had so much to drink I feel like I’m gonna start sweating cider,” Rainbow said, leaning to the side so Pinkie could more clearly see the twelve empty mugs on the bar next to her. “Feeling a buzz coming and you don’t wanna see my drunk dancing. It’s not pretty and I got a rep to keep here,”

“Awww,” Pinkie pouted. “Well…I GUESS I can go it alone,”

“Well now you’re just making me feel bad. Sorry Pinkie,” Rainbow rolled her eyes a bit and chugged down the last bit of cider in her mug, turning it upside down and adding it to the twelve empty ones at her side.

Just then, another mug of cider slid down the bar right into Pinkie’s hooves, confusing Pinkie a bit. She looked up at Applejack who was manning the bar from behind the counter. She had been on the other end but began to trot Pinkie and Rainbow’s way.

“Oh um, Applejack, I didn’t ask for any-“

Applejack put her hoof up. “Yeah, yeah, ah know ya didn’t. That’s from the mare on the other end there. An’ don’t look now but she’s been eyein’ ya up like ya were the sweetest darn apple fritter she’s ever seen all night. And uh…well…”

“Huh?” Pinkie looked past Applejack and like she said, there was indeed a mare sitting on the other end, and her appearance almost immediately caught Pinkie’s attention.

There were some instances in the past where Pinkie’s emotional state was incredibly dour, and during those times, her ordinarily poofy mane would completely deflate and straighten out. The mare she was seeing sitting across the bar was almost a dead ringer in appearance for her when Pinkie was in that state. There were a few differences though. That straight, pink mane of hers was tied in the back forming a long ponytail that draped over her shoulder. The dress she wore was a long black evening gown that covered her cutie mark and stuck tightly to her chest so only a small tuft of her chest fluff was able to poke out from under it. Her outfit was completed by matching black stockings on all four of her legs and dark purple eyeshadow around her eyes.

If it were not for those few differences, especially the mare’s choice of attire, Pinkie could have sworn she was looking into a mirror. The shade of her fur and mane, her bright blue eyes, the ever so slightly pudgy figure, all of it was the same.

The mare was looking directly at her, with one foreleg resting on the bar holding her head up. If her intentions hadn’t been made clear already by buying Pinkie’s drink, they were more than confirmed from the flirtatious smile and wink she sent Pinkie’s direction.

This stirred up some feelings in Pinkie she didn’t quite understand, and her cheeks blushed a little. “M-Mmm…she looks…a LOT like me,”

“Ah noticed. Ya don’t think Twilight mighta missed one of those clones from the Mirror Pool do ya?” Applejack asked.

“Mmm, COULD be but…if she was a clone that’s anything like me, I don’t think she’d be wearing…um…that. It’s not Pinkie-style,” Pinkie said, glancing back up at the smiling mare in a bashful manner.

“No kidding, I mean…dang,” Rainbow gawked, a bit floored at the mare’s looks. “Well…either way, she’s definitely checking you out. You want me and AJ to go let her down for ya?” Rainbow asked, already knowing Pinkie well enough to know she only liked guys that way.

“Oh no, I can do it!” Pinkie replied, steeling her resolve. “Besides, I should probably thank her for the cider myself anyway,” she then downed the entire mug in one go and making her way to the mare’s side.

“Well, okay if you’re…sure,” Rainbow trailed off as Pinkie had already left them behind. She shrugged and looked at Applejack. “Hey AJ, can ya get me another cider?”

Applejack deadpanned. “How about ya look at the thirteen ya already put in yer face and ask me that again,”

Rainbow’s eyes glanced over at her mug pile and she awkwardly played with the skirt of her gala dress, not really knowing how to follow up. “…Pretty please?”

“No,” Applejack facehoofed.


Pinkie Pie was able to chalk up the mare’s voice as another difference between the two of them, as the mare spoke first when Pinkie approached her.

“Finally worked up the nerve to talk to me, hm?” the mare asked with a flirty smile. While her voice still had a somewhat high pitch to it, it was nowhere near as much as Pinkie’s and was more reigned-in. If her voice and choice of gala dress was any indication, this mare likely carried herself with similar elegance to other mares usually in attendance here.

Pinkie blushed a little bit and took the seat next to her but didn’t show signs of nervousness on her face as she smiled back in her usual, friendly and excitable manner. “I was just coming to say thanks for the cider. It’s nice to meet a new friendly face! I’m Pinkie Pie!” Pinkie said, holding out her hoof for the mare to shake it.

“Oh, I know ALL about you,” The mare said as she shook pinkie’s hoof with her own stockinged hoof, not letting up on that flirtatious smile of hers. “Pink Diamond. I’m a jeweler from out of town,” she replied with her name. She then took Pinkie by surprise by kissing her hoof instead of just letting go right away and looking at her with her blue eyes half-lidded. “But you can just call me Diamond, sugar,”

The butterflies came back into Pinkie’s stomach, and she could feel her face getting hotter. She didn’t understand why this mare made her so nervous, but she was feeling it even more than before now. Inwardly she was a bit flattered; ponies wouldn’t usually give her this sort of attention. Rarity and Fluttershy maybe, not usually her. So, she did appreciate it a bit.

Nevertheless, she pulled her hoof away, a bit of laughter escaping her mouth as she tried her best to make it not sound awkward.

“E-Eheh…I um…I don’t wanna disappoint you Diamond, but I only like stallions that way,” Pinkie said, the blush still visible on her face.

“Awww, seems like all the good ones do,” Diamond said still wearing her smile and feigning disappointment. It occurred to Pinkie that Diamond could see how badly she was blushing at the moment and concluded that she wasn’t buying it. “But I get it. Guys can be quite the lookers too,”

Pinkie quickly decided to change the topic before her heart could explode. “S-So um…I just wanted to ask…how do you feel about…weird questions?”

Diamond giggled. “Heheh. Love them. How weird are we talking?”

Pinkie then got in a bit closer and somewhat loudly whispered. “You’re not a mirror pool clone of me, are you? You don’t remember Twilight making you watch paint dry and maybe…running away? Because we look…a LOT A LOT alike,”

Diamond blinked in confusion and said nothing for a few moments, looking like she didn’t know how to respond. “Uh…no? I’m sure I’d remember something like that if that happened. But you’re right, that question is strange,”

Pinkie breathed a bit of a sigh of relief. “Phew. I didn’t think so. I don’t think a Pinkie Pie would be wearing what you’re wearing,”

Diamond pouted a little bit, now seemingly feigning hurt. “What? Don’t like my dress?”

Pinkie inwardly smacked herself and stammered over her words. “O-Oh no no, it’s…very pretty! You’re wearing it great!”

Diamond smirked a little, as if Pinkie had played right into her hooves. “Glad to hear it, sugar. Your dress looks lovely too. Really brings out those baby blues of yours~” Diamond said looking right into Pinkie’s eyes.

Pinkie could feel several beads of sweat forming on her head. “E-Eheheh…thanks…ANYWAY,” she coughed. “So…why do you think we look so similar then?” Pinkie then thought of one possibility and gasped. “You don’t think we’re long-lost sisters do you?! Gosh my parents have some real explaining to do if that’s it,”

Diamond giggled again, not seeming to put much stock into this theory either. “Well with how much I’ve been coming onto you, I’d certainly hope not. Look, you’re letting that big, beautiful imagination of yours run wild. Think about it. Is it really so strange that two ponies in this big, wonderful kingdom of ours could turn out looking very similar with no relation? Equestria is a big place after all. Unlikely sure, but not impossible,”

“Well…it’s reaaaal weird…But I’ve seen weirder,” Pinkie said, thinking back to a select few cases where such a thing occurred, such as Twilight’s friend Moon Dancer looking a lot like Twilight with different colors and clothes, or Daring Do having the same similarity with Rainbow Dash.

“There you go. No need to think about it too hard; we just happen to be very similar, very attractive ponies, that’s all,” Diamond said, taking a sip of her own cider. “So listen, I have a previous engagement tonight. I can only remain at the Gala for so long, and I have yet to have a proper dance tonight. I suppose the ponies here are a bit too…intimidated. But I saw you ‘breaking it down’ as it were on the dance floor over there. If you still have it in you, maybe you and I might share a dance, hmm?~”

“Oh! That could be fun! I actually did want a dance partner!” Pinkie said excitedly. Considering how this mare had made her feel thus far, Pinkie would have thought this would make her more nervous. However, she did just give the same offer to Rainbow not but a few minutes ago. It was just dancing; it wasn’t a big deal.

“Oh goodie!~” Diamond said with glee as she downed the rest of her drink. “Best we not waste any time, lets go!”

Diamond excitedly held Pinkie’s hoof and rushed down to the dance floor with her, managing to take even the pink party pony by surprise as she began to wonder what she had really just agreed to. The moment the two of them stepped down, Diamond wasted no time in getting the band’s attention, specifically the grey mare with the bowtie playing the cello that Pinkie recognized as Octavia.

“Hi, yes, excuse me. Could you perhaps play something a tad…spicier?” Diamond asked, handing her a small bag of bits she had pulled seemingly out of nowhere. Octavia simply stared at it for a moment, unsure before glancing at the rest of the band. Their silent communication seemed to indicate they didn’t mind switching it up a bit, so she nodded at Diamond and turned a couple of pages in her book of sheet music to find a proper song.

Seeing this, Pinkie was reminded of so many instances in the past where she would pull objects out of thin air that seemingly didn’t exist mere moments before, usually to make some kind of point or make her friends laugh. And here this mare was that was somehow doing the same thing but for a more practical purpose like hiding her money.

Pinkie was pulled out of inwardly theorizing who in the world this mare really was by the band changing songs. Whereas the previous one was more so background music, this one was much harsher, louder and more deliberate with a bit more space between notes. Diamond stood on her hind legs and helped Pinkie to do the same. Their bodies pressed up against each other with Diamond putting one foreleg around Pinkie’s waist and the other dedicated to holding her hoof.

Pinkie’s face turned nearly as red as an apple; was looking to be a lot more intimate than what she’d had in mind and wasn’t sure she even knew how to do it right. “D-Diamond, I don’t know about this,”

“Shh, don’t be nervous sugar. Just follow my lead and you’ll do fine~,” Diamond assured her.

Just as Pinkie suspected going off the music and close contact, Diamond started up a tango with her leading and Pinkie meant to be following. It wasn’t a dance Pinkie was familiar with, but with Diamond doing most of the work, she managed. Following the short and quick strides the two of them took, their dresses flapped slightly in the breeze they created.

Diamond spun Pinkie around a few times, eventually pulling her back toward her and holding her from behind. “See? Nothing to it right?” Diamond whispered in her ear.

Pinkie knew she was trying to be reassuring but Diamond’s voice whispering right in her ear like that caused Pinkie to feel like her whole body was going to melt.

As the two of them kept up their dance, eventually they caught the attention of the nobles in attendance who all stopped what they were doing to watch. That crowd that began to form looked on in amazement, both at the grace of the two mares and also being impressed that somepony seemingly managed to tame Pinkie Pie.

Also keeping a close watch on them were the friends she’d left behind at the bar, which now included Fluttershy and Rarity sitting with them to watch.

“Gosh, I didn’t think Pinkie knew how to dance like that,” Fluttershy said, looking impressed with the two mare’s form.

“Indeed, our dear Pinkie is full of surprises. The other mare she’s with is quite graceful as well; who is she?” Rarity asked, turning to Rainbow and Applejack.

“Can’t say. Just some mare who was over here giving Pinkie the eyes if you know what I mean,” Rainbow said leaning against the bar. “Funny. Didn’t think Pinkie was into mares like that. Maybe I don’t know her as good as I thought,”

“Ah don’ know about that Sugarcube. You see the look on er’ face? Never seen the girl so flustered. Don’ think even she knew before just now,” Applejack said, almost being so mesmerized by the two’s dancing that she accidentally overfilled a cider mug she’d been filling for a customer, flinching when she realized her mistake. “Ah son of a mother,”

Eventually, Pinkie and Diamond’s dance ended as the music came to a halt with Diamond dipping Pinkie, only slightly holding her head up so she didn’t touch the ground. The crowd cheered much more genuinely than earlier, clapping their hooves and a few of them even getting rowdy enough to whistle. Pinkie though didn’t hear any of it though as the sound of her heart raging in her ears from Diamond looking her directly in the eyes drowned out everything else.

Diamond briefly glanced up at the crowd before turning her attention back to Pinkie. “Heh. Guess we’ll be the talk of the party tonight. So…” Diamond began as she helped Pinkie back up onto all four hooves. “Was it good for you?”

“A…Aaah….nnn…”Pinkie’s mouth failed to form words, too flustered to form even anything resembling a coherent thought.

Diamond giggled. “YOU have nothing to say? Goodness, what did I do to you?” She then glanced over at a clock on the wall signaling that it was close to midnight and frowned a little. She sighed a bit before looking back at Pinkie. “Alas, it is as I said. As much as I’d like to have some more fun with you here, I have other places to be tonight,”

“O-Oh that’s…that’s okay!” Pinkie said, her thoughts catching up to her. “I’m sure we’ll see each other again soon!”

“Indeed,” Diamond said turning toward the crowd to leave, but not before running her long, straight, pink tail against Pinkie’s neck and under her chin in a flirtatious manner. “Don’t be a stranger, cutie,” Diamond winked at her and hastily made her way out of the ballroom, producing a fan from seemingly nowhere to somewhat hide her face behind.

Her blush having been spurred on again by Diamond’s last display of affection, Pinkie just stood there for several seconds staring at the mare’s backside as she left, and once she had disappeared into the crowd, staring at nothing in particular. Pinkie was totally lost in her own head. She’d come into the Gala tonight very confident in her sexuality. She only liked stallions that way, that was it. But after THAT…well, that confidence had very much been shaken.

Not even knowing what else to do after that, Pinkie simply returned back to the bar with her friends, still wearing that same thousand-yard stare as she took a seat.

“Dang Pinkie, you had the whole place going wild. You dance awesome!” Rainbow said, trying to help Pinkie out of her funk.

It was to no avail though as Pinkie did not respond.

“Goodness, Pinkie are you okay?” Fluttershy asked with concern.

Pinkie finally blinked for the first time in the past five minutes. “I…don’t...know…” she muttered.

“Ah heck. Ah think that mare went and broke er’,” Applejack said, still wiping up the mess she’d made earlier.

“Well, I for one happen to think it’s just splendid Pinkie’s discovering herself tonight,” Rarity said with a smile as she patted Pinkie’s back. “Congratulations darling,”

Pinkie didn’t respond to this either, but eventually did speak up. “I never thought I’d say this but…I think I wanna leave the party now. I need to thi-“

Pinkie would not be allowed to finish that sentence as Twilight quickly came barreling out of the crowd carrying a brown book with her mane in a frenzy and a frantic look on her face. “Pinkie, Pinkie, PINKIE!” She yelled.

“Huh?” Pinkie completely snapped out of her trance and rotated her stool in Twilight’s direction.

Having made it to the bar with the rest of her friends, Twilight slammed the book down on the bar and looked Pinkie dead in the face. “Pinkie, that mare you were dancing with, what was her name?!”

“Woah Twilight, easy girl. Where’s the fire?” Applejack interjected, trying to calm her down.

“Gracious, you look positively stressed right now, whatever is the matter?” Rarity also asked.

“I don’t care how I look right now, I’m dealing with a potential crisis!” Twilight retorted, looking back at Pinkie again. “Pinkie! Mare’s name, now!”

“S-She said her name was Pink Diamond. W-Why, what’s wrong?” Pinkie asked, looking nervous.

In her haste, Twilight didn’t respond to Pinkie and instead flipped through the book, only stopping when she reached a page marked with the letter ‘P’. Her eyes quickly scanned over it several times over. Eventually she sighed in resignation and shut the book. “It’s just as I thought,” Twilight muttered, putting a hoof to her forehead, clearly in distress.

“Twilight, I know this is gonna sound weird coming from me but slow the heck down. What. Is. Happening?” Rainbow asked sternly.

Twilight took a moment to try and calm herself down, proceeding to inhale and exhale just as Cadance taught her. “Okay…I was having a conversation with Prince Blueblood about maybe 15 minutes ago. Just friendly conversation, nothing serious. So, he gets us glasses of wine, I guess maybe in an attempt to be courteous, you know? Maybe he’s gotten better?”

“Doubtful, but continue,” Rarity said with a deadpanned expression, clearly remembering the last time she met Blueblood.

“Anyway, RIGHT as I’m about to take a sip, that Pink Diamond mare bumps into me and makes me spill my wine all over Blueblood’s fur and everything. She tried to play it off like it was just an accident and her being clumsy, but I could have sworn I’d seen her kind of speed-walking our way, almost as if she was TRYING to bump into me. The whole interaction was very strange,” Twilight continued.

“That IS weird. But…why would she do that?” Fluttershy asked.

“I still haven’t figured that out. But anyhow, Blueblood leaves to go clean himself up; was REALLY angry, fuming. Before I can get another word out of the mare she’s already gone. But the thing that really nagged at me was when I was greeting all the guests as they came in, not once did I see that mare arrive. And I’m fairly certain I would remember speaking to somepony that looks almost exactly like one of my best friends, so I’m not mistaken, there’s just no way,” Twilight continued shaking her head.

“So…what? Celestia’s usually greeting ponies as they come in too, maybe she saw her?” Rainbow Dash said with a cocked eyebrow.

“See that’s what I thought, so I went to ask her, and guess what? SHE hadn’t seen her either. Princess Celestia’s been at the entrance all night, there’s no way she could have missed her. So, finally at this point I’m just really freaking out because there’s a mare who’s a dead ringer for Pinkie I’d never seen before here acting really weird, which brings us to this,” Twilight said, pulling up the cover of the book for them to see. “The guest book. This catalogues everypony that received a ticket to the Gala. And now what do I find?”

A collective nervousness fell over Twilight’s friends, as they had already put together where this was headed.

Twilight then slammed the book back down. “There is no Pink Diamond in this guest book. Nopony under that name should be at this Gala,”

Pinkie’s ears fell to her head and she very much looked to be in distress from this revelation. “T-Twilight, a-are you saying that…” she couldn’t finish that sentence.

Twilight shut her eyes and sighed. “Pinkie, I know you looked very entranced by her and I’m really sorry but…that mare is not who she says she is,“

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!”

Just then, as if on some sick cue by the will of the universe, the entire ballroom could hear a scream of a stallion echo throughout practically the entire castle from how loud it was. Pinkie and her friends tore themselves away from their conversation to look in the direction of the source. Barging back into the ballroom was none other than Prince Blueblood, mane in a mess and the faint stains of red wine on his fur coat, a look of pure, violent anger on his face.

Celestia, who was at the entrance, quickly tried to calm her nephew down. “Blueblood, what in Equestria is wrong?!”

Blueblood looked up at Celestia, his pupils having shrunk down to pin pricks from his rage. “AUNTIE LOCK DOWN THE CASTLE, MOBILIZE THE GUARDS! ALL OF MY TREASURE IS GONE FROM MY BEDROOM, I’VE BEEN ROBBED!”

Everyone was transfixed on the screaming Blueblood, that nopony seemed to notice or care when Rainbow simply reached behind the bar and filled herself up another mug of cider, taking a swig of it, a deadpanned expression on her face. “Yep. I knew this Gala was going just a little too normally,”


Just outside the castle, a carriage being pulled by an enormous mass of fur and muscle awaited for the pink mare to make her exit. It was parked off to the side where nopony would be looking for it. The moment she was sure nopony was watching, she jumped in the carriage.

“Fluffy, book it, they probably noticed all Blueball’s shit’s gone by now,” Slinky said as she pulled her hair out of the ponytail she’d had her mane done up in.

Fluffy, the eight foot tall, muscular Diamond Dog attached to the carriage, looked in the window behind him and nodded at her before taking off down the road out of Canterlot.

Meanwhile, the adult changeling with glasses in the back seat of the carriage had his forelegs crossed. “You took a lot longer than we would’ve liked, you know. Had us worried you got caught,”

Meanwhile, Slinky was quickly pulling off her evening gown and stockings as she was sitting down. “Plan went off without a hitch, Jade. Screw up Blueball’s plan to poison Princess Twilight and steal all his stuff to add insult to injury. No biggie,” she said as she pulled an enormous bag of loot out of thin air and sitting it next to her. “Gosh, the hammerspace is useful,” she said with a smirk.

“Is that right?” Jade said sarcastically, not looking convinced. “So…what DID take you so long then?”

Slinky had just finished changing clothes, now wearing a skin-tight black jumpsuit made out of some kind of fake leather. “Heh, I uh…” Slinky said bashfully as she rubbed the back of her head. “…I mighta tried shooting my shot with the Element of Laughter, that’s all,”

Jade practically jumped forward, gripping the seat in front of him. “SHOOTING YOUR WHAT WITH WHO NOW?!?!” Jade nearly screamed.

“Hey, gimme a break, hot ponies are like my one vice, lemme have this,” Slinky said, pouting a little.

“She looks almost exactly like you, you know. Not judging but…” Fluffy said with a hint of a growl in his voice as he ran.

Slinky reclined in her seat. “Yeah yeah, the ultimate form of narcissism, shut up. The mare’s a knockout, can you blame me?” Slinky said, waving it off.

“Oh my shit, Pinkie Pie is practically a national treasure are you TRYING to give me a heart attack? This is NOT playing it safe Slinky,” Jade muttered in distress, holding both sides of his head.

“Look will you stop fretting about it?” Slinky asked, looking back at him from her seat. “It’s done. I’m probably not gonna ever see her again. We got all the prince’s shit and that ricin he had in his bedroom’s about to come into the hooves of ponies that will take care of it from there. We’re outta Canterlot, at least for a while and no worse for wear. Okay?”

“Nnngh…skirt-chasing on the job, and with a fuckin’ Element, why are you the way that you are?” Jade asked, still looking worried.

Slinky could not give a solid answer besides shrugging.

Chapter 3: Payback

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After Prince Blueblood’s outburst, the Gala had been put on hold with the castle completely locked down. Guards were positioned at every locked ballroom exit, several others being dispatched into the city in hopes of finding the thief, and a few searched Blueblood’s room for possible clues. The incident had caused quite a ruckus among the guests, with many of them gossiping to each other about the burglary, and some worried if they could be hit next.

Twilight’s entire night had been plagued with strange occurrences, but that did not stop her from trying to put a distressed Blueblood sitting on the stairs with his head in his hooves at ease. Even if the stallion had some unpleasant tendencies. “Prince Blueblood…are you alright?”

Blueblood raised his head, an annoyed expression on his face. “Do I LOOK alright to you? My private chambers, the place I should feel most safe and secure, utterly violated! All of my treasure, stolen right out from under me! I feel…unclean!” Blueblood growled, grinding his teeth.

Twilight’s ears folded in worry. “Well if it’s some comfort, they couldn’t have gotten too far, I’m sure that the guards will-“

“Oh PLEASE,” Blueblood bitterly rolled his eyes. “When is the last time any of them stopped anything? Incompetent buffoons have probably passed the thief two or three times by now without so much as realizing,”

“Hey, my brother’s among them too, you know,” Twilight said with a hint of anger in her voice; more than a bit offended at the slight against Shining Armor. Of course, Blueblood had just been robbed so he was more irritable than usual. So perhaps, Twilight thought, he didn’t mean it.

“Hmph. I know what I sai-YIPE!” Initially Blueblood had snobbishly turned up his nose at her but was quickly interrupted when an aura of golden magic covered his tail. He was yanked into the air and held upside down, startling both him and Twilight.

Blueblood flailed about in outrage and from the pain in his tail. “AGH! WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!” He yelled. He stood dead still though when he saw who he was now in the magical grasp of; none other than his aunt, Princess Celestia herself was glaring at him with an intense, white-hot anger the prince had never seen of her before. The sight of his enraged aunt and the two, stoic unicorn guards accompanying her made him go somehow paler than his already white fur made him. “A-Auntie?” he stammered.

“Princess Celestia?!” Twilight gasped, also not used to seeing the princess furious, at least not like this.

For the time being, Celestia did not address her former student and instead kept her gaze on Blueblood. Out from behind her using her magic, she pulled a small vial filled with some sort of powdery substance inside in front of the prince’s face for him to see. The princess then spoke, not even raising her voice.

“You thought the guards wouldn’t find this, didn’t you? This was inside a tear in your mattress in your room. Explain yourself,” Celestia growled.

Blueblood could hardly form a cohesive sentence. “I-I…that’s…it’s not…that isn’t mine. S-Surely those thieves planted it when they broke in!”

“Don’t play dumb,” one of the guards spoke up. “The only hoofprints on this were yours. And they appear to be several days old. You’ve had this for a while,”

Princess Celestia yanked Blueblood’s now-shivering body higher into the air so he was face to face with her. “Now tell me…what were you doing with ricin in your possession?”

Twilight’s ears perked up at the mention of the substance. Being very well read, of course she’d heard of ricin before, it was an incredibly deadly poison; nearly untraceable partially due to the symptoms being almost flu-like at first. But what did Blueblood have ricin for?”

Then, when Twilight took the night’s strange events into account, it began to dawn on her. She thought back to the odd interaction with the mysterious pink mare from earlier in the evening.

She seemed to purposefully bump into her right as she was about to drink the wine Blueblood gave her.

Blueblood was more furious than what was reasonable.

The mare clearly knew something Twilight didn’t and lied to Pinkie about her identity; she hadn’t been invited to the Gala at all.

Her appearance and disappearance lined up with the robbery of Blueblood’s treasure.

And now ricin was found in Blueblood’s possession, with him being confirmed to be the only one to touch it.

When Twilight finally reached the truth in her mind, it shook her so much that she could not help but blurt it out.

“You tried to POISON ME?!?” Twilight shouted at Blueblood, loud enough that it caught the attention of nearly everyone in the ballroom.

Blueblood for several moments could not bring himself to speak, as with Twilight’s accusation, Celestia’s fiery glare that burned into his soul had only worsened. Eventually, Blueblood could take it no more and he shut his eyes, his own expression twisting into that of anger.

“It…should have…” Blueblood quietly growled, too quiet for anypony to hear.

“What?” Celestia asked, the barely restrained rage clear in her voice.

“IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME, DAMN IT!” Blueblood yelled turning back to face Celestia again. “You intended to put this…this…pretender in rulership of the entire kingdom and deny me my birthright!”

Ordinarily Twilight might have taken that slight at her princesshood personally. Considering Blueblood essentially just admitted to trying to kill her however, she did not give his word any value and simply just shook her head.

“And you thought to solve this perceived problem through murder?” Celestia hissed.

Blueblood huffed unapologetically. “You know very well I was next in line before you brought HER into this. If you’d just given me what I was owed from the start I wouldn’t have had to resort to thi-OOF,” Celestia was not willing to hear Blueblood out anymore and threw him a few feet behind her, letting him fall to the floor with a loud thud.

“Your actions tonight have proven exactly why you should never be near the throne. Guards, take him away. I will deal with him later,” Celestia said, not even turning around to face the prince.

At her command, the two guards surrounded Blueblood and hoisted him up to take him to the dungeon, along with putting a magic-restraining ring around his horn, much to his anger.

“RRGH UNHAND ME YOU BRUTES! I WON’T STAND FOR THIS DISRESPECT; I AM A PRINCE DAMN YOU!” he yelled, nearly foaming at the mouth and squirming.

“Be glad it’s us you’re dealing with and not Shining Armor. After what you tried to do to his sister, he wouldn’t be nearly as gentle,” one of the guards restraining him said to him as he was being dragged out. The many guests at the gala could still hear the enraged Blueblood’s furious yells echoing down the hall as he was escorted out; evidentially he had not stopped resisting.

The scene before them caused all the noble ponies in attendance to quietly gossip amongst themselves, but Celestia did not seem to care. Instead, her wings and head lowered slightly as she exhaled a breath she’d been keeping in this whole time and looked down apologetically at her former student.

“Twilight, I am so sorry. I knew Blueblood could be ill-behaved, but I never would have thought he was capable of this. I should have paid closer attention to how deep his bitterness ran. Can you forgive me?” Celestia asked.

“It’s…it’s okay. It’s nopony’s fault but his,” Twilight responded to Celestia with a comforting pat on her shoulder, trying to smile a bit despite the situation. “Not that I’m a stranger to danger at this point but…this is going to be a regular thing when I’m in charge, isn’t it?”

“I wish I could tell you it won’t be, truly, but…” Celestia trailed with sadness in her voice.

Twilight sighed. “Don’t worry about me. Like I said, this is far from my first time my life was threatened. I’ll do my best to stay on my hooves more from now on…that said…” Twilight put her hoof to her chin, looking down at the floor in thought before looking back up at Celestia. “There’s still the matter of the Gala being infiltrated. I need to talk to my friends. I think that pink mare from earlier might have something to do with all this,”

“The one you mentioned earlier, yes? You think she might be the one responsible?” Celestia asked.

“Considering nopony under the name she gave is on the guest list and all that treasure just mysteriously vanishes while she’s here? A relatively easy guess,” Twilight replied. Inwardly, she had other thoughts on the matter though.

If she is the one responsible though, would a thief not just get the treasure and leave as quick as possible? Why did she concern herself with me and with Pinkie? What is that mare playing at?’ Twilight pondered to herself.

“Well, I’d hate to be of no help myself Twilight. Is there anything I can do?” Celestia asked.

“As a matter of fact…get the guards to get together any criminal record they might have of a pink mare with some passing resemblance to Pinkie. I’ll have Rarity come by to get them and look for anything else of value,” Twilight said with a smile. “This whole mystery thing is right up her alley after all,”


Hours later, Twilight and her friends had gone to the room Celestia had prepared for them to sleep in at the castle overnight. The only one of them not present at the moment was Rarity, who when told she’d be instrumental to solving a mystery involving thieves, was more than ecstatic to once again act out her fantasy of being a criminal detective.

Rainbow collapsed on the extravagant bed in the room, laying on her side and groaning as all the cider she’d consumed throughout the evening had finally caught up with her.

“Guuyths…I’m feelin’ justh a little bit silly right now. I’mma gonna feel thith in the mornin’, yesssirrr,” Rainbow mumbled in her drunken daze.

“Sugarcube, that’s whatcha get fer not listenin’ ta me,” Applejack sat across from her rolling her eyes. She’d warned the mare to stop at just two but of course, Rainbow ignored her advice.

“Youuuu shudda-OOF,” Rainbow held her stomach in pain. “BATHROOM, NOW,” Rainbow yelled as she quickly stood up and flew into the nearby bathroom, locking the door behind her. Many vomiting sounds were heard coming from it for minutes to come.

“Well, gotta feelin’ Rainbow’s gonna be pretty useless ta this whole thing till she sobers up at least,” Applejack said, shaking her head. She briefly glanced over at Pinkie who was being uncharacteristically quiet; just sitting alone in a soft chair in the corner of the room, not talking to any of them. “Ya think we oughta say somethin’ ta her? Ta tell you the truth ah’m not even sure what ta say,” Applejack whispered to Twilight and Fluttershy.

“Frankly neither do I. This evening’s been a real shock for her I’m sure,” Twilight replied with her ears drooping a bit.

“Still…we should at least try,” Fluttershy, said, looking sure of herself as she stood up and trotted over to Pinkie. “Pinkie? Pinkie are you okay?” she asked with concern.

Pinkie didn’t respond, instead just sat there, seemingly not staring at anything, absentmindedly playing with a strand of her mane.

“Pinkie, hey,” Twilight said, gently swatting at Pinkie’s mane a bit to get her to pay attention.

“Hm?” Pinkie finally looked up, only just realizing they were there. “O-Oh gosh I’m sorry Twilight, I was just thinking,”

“I can tell; you were being awfully quiet the past few hours. It’s not like you,” Twilight frowned in worry for her friend. “Still thinking about that pink mare?”

Pinkie’s cheeks turned red as her thoughts turned back toward the dance she’d shared with her earlier in the evening, and she nodded. “I just…I’ve never caught feelings like that for another mare. But…why? Why did she lie to me?” Pinkie whimpered.

Applejack frowned and patted Pinkie on the back. “There there sugarcube. We’re gonna figure out who she REALLY is, find er, and make her explain herself fer breakin’ yer heart like that,”

Pinkie managed a half-smile at that. “You mean it?”

“Well for that-“ Twilight began. “-And the fact she might be an actual criminal,”

Applejack deadpanned a bit. “Yeah, an’ that she might be an actual criminal-where the heck’s Rarity?” she asked. “How many ponies can there really be that look like Pinkie AND have a criminal record?”

As if on cue, the bedroom door burst open, and Rarity trotted inside, wearing the cloak and long brimmed hat she would usually don whenever working on a mystery like this. “Detective Rarity has returned with the necessary case files to shed some light on the-“

“BLEEEEEEGH”

Rarity stopped dramatically narrating her entrance when she heard Rainbow in the bathroom vomiting again. The moment thoroughly ruined, Rarity visibly deflated, her expression deadpanned. “Am I to assume that she won’t be joining us?”

“I think she’d rather have privacy,” Fluttershy said, her eyes nervously glancing over at the bathroom door, ears drooped a bit.

“By the by, what took ya so long? Search couldn’ta taken that long right?” Applejack asked with a raised eyebrow.

Keeping true to her detective persona, Rarity’s eyes narrowed and she spoke in a quiet, serious tone. “Little did Applejack realize that while there was only one other pony that matched the description given, it would lead Detective Rarity down an immense rabbit hole that she never would have expecte-“

“Rarity, this pony somehow knew Blueblood was out to kill me, this is serious,” Twilight said, looking annoyed at her theatrics.

Rarity, realizing she’d been narrating her case outloud again, awkwardly coughed into her hoof. “Ah, yes. My apologies…again, I’m glad you’re alright darling,” she said, holding up the case file she’d brought with her in her magic, placing it on the bed for the five of them to see. When she placed it down, the folder opened itself and the contents of it spilled out across the comforter.

Inside it were photos of various crime scenes. Empty heavy-duty safes, barren walls that once held valuable paintings, doors with various locks on them that were just wide open with no visible damage done to them, and many others. “I know this is going to shock you, but there are not many ponies that look exactly like our dear friend that also have a criminal record. I managed to find the candidate relatively early on, but I was surprised to find just how extensive their criminal history is. But a number of things surprised me about this. Chief among them being she was not working alone,”

“Really? But…she looked alone to me,” Fluttershy said looking through some of the crime scene photos.

“Likely her associates helped her in ways that did not require them to be present in the ballroom,” Rarity said as she sifted through the various papers to find a few specific ones on the culprits. “To be precise, she leads a group of other thieves that call themselves ‘Payback’. Seems they’ve made quite a name for themselves these past few years with similar robberies…Ah here we go!” Rarity explained as she pulled out the papers she was looking for.

The first one she showed to her friends was a file on their first member which was shown through a photo attached by a paperclip to the rest of the paper; one that appeared to be taken without the subject’s knowledge and from a distance. The subject in question was a Changeling, black in color just like the rest of them used to be, with dark purple eyes and carapace and wearing a pair of rectangular glasses. The changeling seeming to nervously glance behind his back indicated he was one to scare easy.

“A changeling?” Fluttershy asked, surprised. It seemed like before recently most ponies and changelings didn’t get along until Thorax took over. But if this group had been in operation for years, it seemed like they had an exception.

“Yes darling, I was surprised myself. One that hasn’t gone through the same change the others have in fact,” Rarity said as she pointed to the photo and read over the file. “Seems like he operates as the brains of the team. Was likely the one that gathered intelligence on Blueblood and planned the operation,”

“Says here this fella’s name’s Jade. So he’s the smarty, alright…my question’s why is the changeling of em’ not the one sneakin’ around n’ stuff? They could jus’ turn inta somepony else n’ make off with the loot no problem,” Applejack asked, scratching her head.

“A valid question dear Applejack; and one I’m afraid I only have theories for at the moment,” Rarity frowned, clearly dissatisfied with the evidence on Jade on this front. “But if this photo of him is anything to go by, he doesn’t appear to be the picture of grace under fire. Maybe he couldn’t handle it,”

“Makes sense,” Twilight said, scratching her chin with a hoof in thought. “Who else do we have?”

“Next up is…” Rarity paused when she pulled up the next file, only able to stare at it, her face turning red. “U-Um…oh my,”

“Rarity? What’s wrong?” Fluttershy asked, confused as to Rarity’s current state.

Rarity did not answer at first, too entranced as her eyes just trailing up and down the paper. “Estimated eight feet tall and five hundred pounds; woof~” Rarity’s eyes lit up a bit and her friends could have sworn they saw her drooling through that way-too-big smile.

“Do ya…want us ta jus’ give ya a minute alone with that?” Applejack asked, only half joking.

At that, Rarity quickly snapped back to her senses and shook her head. Taking her hat off and fanning her face with it as she now felt incredibly hot. “G-Goodness gracious I’m terribly sorry. I don’t know what came over me. N-Now then…” she said as she composed herself, putting her hat back on her head and laying the file down for the others to see.

The picture attached to this one was of an enormous broad-shouldered and muscular Diamond Dog bulldog with brown eyes and wearing a blue vest, his face hardened and determined as he was walking forward in the photo. “T-This one is named Fluffy. Fairly obvious he’s the raw muscle here,”

“Not sure how he was useful for this specific robbery,” Twilight said, looking over the notes on Fluffy. It was like Rarity said, estimated to weigh in the five hundreds and eight feet in height. “Seems like he stands out a bit too much to be sneaky. I’m sure I would’ve remembered seeing a Diamond Dog that big,”

“We c-can come back to that point later darling,” Rarity said, quickly flipping Fluffy’s photo over so she couldn’t be distracted by it anymore. “Ahem…now lastly we have the one at the center of this entire fiasco,”

Rarity then moved the papers aside to show the last file among them. The subject of the attached photo, taken from a distance just like the others, was unmistakable once Pinkie laid eyes on it. It was of a pink mare wearing a skin-tight black jumpsuit that one would normally find a cat burglar wearing. It would seem she’d been made aware she was being photographed as her head faced the camera, giving a wink and a sly smirk to the photographer as if she were mocking them.

“That’s…that’s her,” Pinkie said, sounding deflated. There was no mistaking it. She had that same uncanny resemblance to Pinkie herself; and there was no way Pinkie would be able to forget those big, alluring blue eyes that matched her own.

“I knew it. I knew something was suspicious about that mare,” Twilight said as she picked the file up. “Her name is not even Pink Diamond. It says here her name is ‘Slinky Sly’; the leader of Payback and the stealth specialist. Collectively she and her friends have…” Twilight paused as she wanted to make sure she was reading this right. “40 accounts of grand larceny?!”

“Good gravy, she’s been busy,” Applejack said, nearly unable to believe it herself. “And ‘Slinky Sly’? Dang that girl’s gone an’ aped yer whole style Pinkie,”

Pinkie didn’t seem to really care about that though, as the saddened look on her face didn’t change. “I don’t understand. If she was there to just rob Blueblood and leave, then…why’d she even bother with me? Maybe…maybe she isn’t all bad?” she asked, her ears drooped.

“Hmmm…she might have just wanted to make a big scene to gloat. ‘Oh look at me, I got past all the castle security, robbed you blind, and am going to be the Gala’s center of attention. You don’t even realize you’ve been hit,’ you know?” Rarity theorized. Though when she saw Pinkie visibly deflating more, inwardly she put her hoof in her mouth and tried to correct course. “O-Of course there’s also the possibility she just wished to have some fun before she fled while she still had time, so…”

“Actually Rarity, Pinkie…you two might not be far off,” Twilight started, putting Slinky’s file down. “There’s also the matter of her knowing about Blueblood trying to get rid of me and foiling his plan. If Slinky were just a lowly thief who cared for nothing but treasure, I doubt she would’ve given what could have happened to me any thought,”

“So, you think she might actually be…good?” Pinkie asked sounding a bit hopeful, ears perking up.

“I dunno sugarcube. Havin’ that many robberies ta her name still don’ look great, but…there might be more to her that we ain’t seein’ here. We’re gonna have ta find her and get er’ to talk,” Applejack added.

“Agreed. Long shot but…if she has some other agenda by being involved in all this thieving, maybe she wouldn’t mind explaining it to us?” Twilight said, packing up all of Payback’s files and putting them back in the folder.

“U-Um…I don’t want to hurt everypony’s optimism but…how are we going to find Slinky? I don’t think she’d want to stick around the scene of the crime for very long. She might be long gone by now,” Fluttershy said, looking nervous at the prospect of going up against what may or may not be hardened criminals.

“Hmm…I’m not sure yet. But I’m sure I can think of some way, I just need to think…” Twilight was interrupted by the sound of Rainbow letting out another pained groan and torrent of vomit from the nearby bathroom. “And Rainbow needs to be sober,” she added with a deadpanned expression.

As her friends planned their next move, Pinkie sat still in the same uncharacteristic silence she’d spent most of the night in after the Gala. When thinking about the night’s events and the mare now known to them as Slinky and what her true goals might be, Pinkie could not be anything but nervous. Bless her friend’s hearts they’ve tried to cheer her up, but they don’t fully understand how the entire ordeal has made her feel; they can’t.

Nnnn…even if you turn out to be as good a pony as I hope…playing with a pony’s feelings like that is not nice,’ Pinkie bitterly thought.