Kung Fu Imoogi
“This will teach you to walk into our turf, punk.”
My name is Jimmy, and you're probably wondering how I ended up in an alley, surrounded by a street gang of New Grifflets, decked out in their gang's colors and everything. Simple I'm an idiot. A complete idiot. And I'm about to be a dead idiot.
You probably know the story by now: one day Equestria showed up in the middle of the ocean and this freaky Veil started spreading. Turns out mana and magic is toxic to humans, like radioactivity. It's moving outwards from Equestria, and nothing we throw at it can stop it. And believe me, we tried literally everything. We invented things to try, so did the Equestrians, nothing worked. Despite what complete lunatics on both sides think, no one wants humanity to die, so last resort: convert species that are vulnerable to mana into species that are immune. Free choice, but the body can only take one change in a lifetime. Makes sense: radically and permanently changing a life form's cellular structure to a completely different one is not easy, I've read the science behind it (yes, I say science: just because Equestrians use magic doesn't mean there's no science to the magic. There's literally a 'science of magic' over there). Basically, radically changing your entire cellular make up permanently multiple times is just asking for your DNA to breakdown. Completely. Not pretty. Some people want to wait to the last moment in hopes they don't have to, some jump in first chance they get to get it over with...Some view it as a fresh start...and some just don't think things through and make a bad decision.
I'm the latter two. My choice? Eastern Dragon, always liked them, and they have a bit more of a 'wisdom' bent to them and are the good guys most of the time...Of course, by know you've probably guessed how that ended for me. Let me get one thing straight: I'm not some frat boy or jock who wanted to be literal hot stuff...I'm a nerd. A geek. The kid who the bully shoves in a locker and calls four eyes. That's me...That's been my life. Poindexter with his glasses and pocket protector who just wants the bullies to leave him alone while he reads his books because he likes to read, only for them to play keep away with it. So once, just once I wanted to be the guy who no one wants to mess with so maybe I can have some peace. That's what I wanted...
Well, good news, I don't need glasses anymore...bad news...I was in such a rush to be the tough guy so I could be safe being the smart guy...I got stupid. Let's get one thing straight: the Bureau are thorough. They let you know exactly what you're getting in for. If you don't make the right decision, you have no one to blame but yourself. I wasn't listening when the negatives were explained. Or when the guy instructing me told me maybe I should go Hippogriff instead (which for the record, would've gotten me what I wanted without the drawbacks). So instead of coming out a cool teenaged eastern dragon out of American Dragon Jake Long (yes, I know they only changed him into one in the later seasons, not the point)...I come out a baby. And it's my own stupid fault.
But it gets worse.
You see, Eastern Dragons are different than their cousins (our scientists are still trying to figure out if they're in the same genius but different species or subspecies, the dragons don't care...at all). Their baby selves are more flexible than the normal, and more agile...but trade off? They start as Imoogi, snake-like infant stages that eventually molt into adults. So not only am I a baby, I'm a baby without limbs. It's not as horrible as that sounds, my tail is at least prehensile and I can move pretty fast...but when it comes to what I wanted? I got bullied more and there's nothing I can do about it but slither somewhere they can't reach and hide...And again, they warned me more than once. It was right there and I was so caught up fantasizing I didn't pay attention. I'm an idiot who ruined his own stupid life.
Bullies decided to pick on me, again, so I slithered down a dark alley to get away...and ran right into the turf of a violent gang of Griffons and ended up with Big griffon with a Mohawk pinning me against a wall with his claws like a switch blade to my neck. It was a mugging at first, but then they realized I didn't have any money and decided to have some fun... I can breathe fire...but I'm not good at it yet, not nearly enough to get out of this...
“Any last words, kid?” asked the big griffin as he prepared to carve me up like a Thanksgiving turkey.
I'm not going to lie...I'm crying...I'm scared. I'm going to die in an alley with no one but some thugs to see it...What will this do to mom? Idiot! I'm such an idiot!
“P-Please, just let me go...” I begged. I don't care what a real dragon would do, I'm not one! I'm just a scared teenager who wants to wake up and get a do over!
“Not the best choice of last words,” he said, grinning like a psycho as he pulled his claws back. I closed my eyes and wait for what's coming, tears running down my face...
And it doesn't.
I opened my eyes to see him looking back. A teenaged Eastern Dragon had his claw by the wrist and pulled it back. The dragon did a 'tisk tisk' gesture with his free claw.
“Now now, you've been given a fresh start and this is what you do with it? Ungrateful one, aren't you?” he asked with just enough of an Asian accent to tell what area of the world he's from. “Dragging the race you've chosen through the mud.”
“Help me...” I begged, not caring how scared I look...He just gives me a nod.
“I would suggest you leave the boy alone, I do not wish to escalate this more than you already have,” the big dragon said, letting some smoke rise from his nose. “But lay another claw on him or me, and you will regret it.”
“I don't care if you're a dragon or not, you're outnumbered,” the lead Griffon said as his boys surrounded the guy. The dragon didn't look worried...I am...Please don't let him get killed trying to save a loser like me.
“I might be outnumbered...” said the guy who'd come to my rescue as the griffon dropped me and grabbed him by the neck. I just stared up like a deer in the headlights (no offense to actual deer). “But you're out of your depth.”
Next thing I know he brought one arm around, grabbing the griff's wrist as he twisted it down and...Okay, still learning Griffon biology, but I don't think his front leg bends that way-Youch! Now it does!
I slithered out of the griffon's way he fell to the ground screaming like a little hen and grabbing his now very broken front leg. I darted under the nearest dumpster and just stared out at what was happening. Call me a coward if you want, I just nearly died and this guy broke a griffon's front leg like a toothpick!
I looked out just in time for one of the other griffins to throw a punch but my rescuer knocked his attacker's arm down, grabbed it with his other and swung the back of his defending claw into his face. Thug hit the ground unconscious with a bloody beak. Another one dove at the dragon from behind, but he caught the griff's wrist and swung him around into two of his buddies, sending all three to the ground. Next one got his arm twisted and a kick to the knee from the dragon's hind leg then a second to...Ouch...I'm glad those are internal on me now...Might be on him too after that...
Last one standing threw a kick, but got his leg caught and one punch to the gut followed by a palm strike to the face that knocked him out cold. The three the dragon knocked down before charged but...well, you can get where this is going. The guy kicked their tails nine ways to Sunday and all the thugs were either out cold or in too much pain to do anything.
Not even winded, the guy walked over to the dumpster I'm was cowering under and offered me a claw. “Are you alright?”
I took it with my tail, finally able to calm down at least a tiny bit without the threat of death.“Y-Yeah...T-Thank you...”
“You're welcome. I called the police when I saw what was happening, they will be here for these soon to be jailbirds shortly. My house is just across the street, would you like to stay for tea while we call your parents to pick you up?”
I didn't have anything better to do (and was too scared to even think of going home by myself), so I just nodded.
At his house, I learned three things about my rescuer: his name was Tranquil Mountain (I didn't change my name, but you think I'm going to question this guy's choices after seeing him beat down an entire gang without even trying?). Second: he was an old man before he converted. No surprise, given he's a teenaged dragon...
And third? He's a Kung Fu Grandmaster. So yeah, no wonder those guys didn't stand a chance. Old master martial artists in a young and way stronger body? Mathematically speaking, that's pretty much a perfect equation for 'person you do not want to mess with under any circumstances.'
Oh, and he was Korean. I don't know different Asian accents to tell them apart, and his accent wasn't very thick to begin with.
“Ah, so you became a dragon seeking the strength to protect yourself? An admirable goal,” replied Tranquil Mountain as he poured the tea as we watched the cops arrest that gang across the street. I see that one New Unicorn who stopped a gunman in his tracks with that cool shield spell of his is one of them...some people make good choices, and then there's me...
“Yeah...too bad I was an idiot...” I replied, looking down at my own snake-like face reflected in the tea.
“You may have made a poor choice...but it is not a choice that is beyond salvaging,” Tranquil said, looking at me in that way only old guys can do.
“Not sure now...”
“Tell me, do you know the legend of the Imoogi in Korean mythology?”
“No...” I was mainly focused on reading about Eastern Dragons, not so much the things that turned into them. That and again, bullies not giving me the best opportunities to do deep research at school, and at home wass the only chance I get to do my out of class work. Senior in High School.
“While certainly far from a one to one comparison to Equus's, it may be worth hearing. Imoogi can become dragons in a number ways, but the one most apt to your situation is that if they survive one thousand years, they transform into a true dragon. While Equestrian ones take a much shorter time, it is a similar concept...That is the way of the Eastern Dragon in other stories as well: in Chinese myth, there is a story where a school of Koi fish swims the Yellow River and reach a waterfall. Many of them gave up, but the remaining ones refused. So the local demons raised the waterfall's height out of malice. However, after one hundred years of trying, one of them finally reached the top, and the gods rewarded it by transforming it into a mighty dragon. You may know that one a little bit, it inspired a Pokemon.”
I just stared in shock at him for a few moments. “You know Pokemon?!”
The old man turned teenaged dragon laughed. “Not all old men are ignorant of technology and popular culture. There is a lot of culture in video games, and they are a work of effort like any medium. And yes, I'm also a fan of D-Wars: Dragon Wars, for all its flaws...”
Wow...an old guy who actually likes modern popular culture...this guy just got 20 percent cooler. Yeah yeah, cheesy, but Rainbow Dash is willing to say it on national television, can't I say it because I think it sounds cool?
“But more on point: that weakness in youth is rewarded with strength in adulthood if one has the perseverance to seek it is often the moral of the legends of Eastern Dragons. You were foolish to think this would be an easy way into strength, yes, but that strength is not beyond your ability to grasp. It will merely require hard work.”
I admit...I hadn't thought of that...I was too busy beating myself up...Not done yet doing that though...
“...That's assuming I make it that long...”
“Dragons are never without their fangs, even when young,” replied Tranquil. “You may not have claws, but you still have coils and fangs. You just need to learn how to use them. I am learning myself. Would you like to learn with me?”
“...How exactly am I supposed to do anything without limbs?” I asked, still in 'pity myself' mode.
He just gave a smirk and folded his arms, using his tail to pick up his tea and sip it without a problem. “You still have one very useful one. Two in fact. Humans have been born with none and still managed a surprising amount. But if you don't believe me... Sonja! Can you come help me and our guest?”
A red little Kirin ran in and bowed respectively. Probably about ten years old. “Yes, grandpa?”
“He's a Kirin? What about the...you know, flamable thing?” I asked, forgetting I was fireproof and backing away a little. Okay, giving a little kid a body that turns into a dangerous flaming demon when they get mad seemed nuts, even if Tranquil was a master martial artist.
“Meditation is something Firewood has been practicing all his life, part of kung fu after all. Controlling his anger and discipline are something he'd not get far not being able to do.”
Firewood...Okay, given Kirin naming conventions, that's kind of clever.
Tranquil flew over to a training dummy that could spin on an axis...then folded his arms and legs up, moving his body pretty much the only way I could. “Control the dummy, like I showed you in sparring.”
The little guy nodded, galloping over and grabbing it. “Ready!”
Firewood swung the limbs of the dummy at his grandfather who practically swam through the hits, blocking with his tail on occasion without a problem. He finally blocked a blow and lunged forwards like a snake, biting down on the head...and not sinking his teeth into it, instead throwing it to the ground (after motioning to his grandson to let go) with his jaws alone. He wrapped around it like a python and constricted it.
“I could crush the dummy if I so chose, but I believe I got my point across.”
Yes...yes he did...I hadn't even thought of any of that...too busy beating myself up over being dumb.
“...I don't have the money.”
Tranquil chuckled, picking up his grandson on his back. “I don't need it. While yes, dragons have an inherit greed, I focus mine on knowledge. I have enough to be content, I have plenty to spare on a willing pupil...so long as you agree to only use what I teach you in self-defense, never as the aggressor and never for revenge.”
I finally decide to ask the question that'd been going through my head since he saved me. “...Why? And why save me at all? I'm just some loser kid...why?”
He puts a claw on what would be my shoulder if I had arms.. “Because no life is not worth it. You breathe, so you are important. You are a smart boy who made a dumb decision, but that does not make you an idiot...And you need help. When I told those brutes they were ungrateful for the chance they had been given, I was being honest and speaking from experience...I said I was from Korea, I didn't say which one. Without help, I would still be there, in a situation I wish you to never experience. I resolved to use that chance allotted to me to aid others. Now, I am offered a third chance with several millennia of life ahead of me...most people are lucky to get one life, I have been given three. It is the least I can do to pay it forwards and spend some of one of those lives helping someone in need.”
I...had a lot to think about after that...but...you can guess from how I was talking how much I needed to hear that...
The police came over to get my statement after the gang were in the hospital and/or jail, I got to meet the unicorn cop. His name's Frank, he's a good guy. Then Mom showed up, hugged me so tight it was easy to forget I was the snake with constricting coils, and thanked Tranquil for saving me. By the way, mom's a Pegasus now, she always did love the sky...
Did I take Tranquil Mountain up on his offer? ...Yeah, I did... Not every day you meet a cool old guy who offers you a second chance at life...or third chance in this case. Maybe I made a mistake...but a bigger mistake might have been giving up a little too early.
Being an Imoogi...isn't as bad as I thought it would be...no arms, but this tail is a lot more useful than I thought...And I get my arms back someday, along with a few perks...I just gotta earn it...And don't worry, I did flip a bully, but only when he put me in a headlock...I promised Tranquil not to use it for revenge, and I kept my word.
Now if you excuse me, my training session is over for the day, we're going to go pop in Pulgasari and watch it with my mom. Movie's got a fascinating backstory...
The End.