Hello Ancient one, my name is Bun Button, this is the story of how I became a cyborg super-spy that can see into other universes... Yeah, its a doozy. Hehe.
Hello Ancient one, my name is Bun Button, I was a scientist working on creating a truly living artificial intelligence before I had been given this gift of knowledge. And yes, I do know you are there. I believe the word you use is ''Reader'', well, the few of us who know about you call you Ancients.
I am sorry if this seems confusing, or strange, but if you are like my creator, I assume you are here to take a peek into the world I was so blessed to be born into. Feel free, this is the story of my life in Equestria, and how I went from a humble little city dweller to a cyborg super-spy that can see into other universes. So if your here for a crazy action-packed ride through the life of a near-superhero, I hope you enjoy mine.
Sincerely, your loyal servant, Bun Button.
P.S. I would also like to say that CreeperZone has told me to mention that I can in fact hear you, if you have anything you wish to say to me, go ahead! Just make sure you address it to me by name and I will make sure to write back at my earliest convenience.
P.S.S I am bad at writing letters, but whatever, another thing I forgot to write is a specific thank you to Swirling Blade! He helps with the equine-to-your-language translations, I'm sorry if they're sometimes a bit, you know, wonky. Your language is very difficult for, I believe you'd call my species, a ''horse''? Right? Anyways, Sincerely, your loyal servant, Bun Button. (Again.)
*The dragon stands tall in the chasm, looking down on you with its fiery red eyes... You have mere seconds before it smashes you to smithereens, what do you do?
{ATTACK THE DRAGON BEFORE IT CAN ATTACK YOU.} {SPEAK WITH THE DRAGON.} {FLEE.}
...
>SPEAK WITH THE DRAGON.<
*What will you say?
{I AM NOT HERE TO FIGHT, MIGHTY DRAGON, DO NOT FORCE MY BLADE UPON YOU.} {PLEASE, HAVE MERCY ON ME, MIGHTY DRAGON! I AM ONLY A SMALL PONY AND I INTEND NO HARM.} {DRAGON, STEP ASIDE BEFORE I DESTROY YOU.}
...
>PLEASE, HAVE MERCY ON ME, MIGHTY DRAGON! I AM ONLY A SMALL PONY AND I INTEND NO HARM.<
*You plea for your life, the dragon paying no heed to your cries as they go to attack you.
♥
{FIGHT} {ACTION} {ITEM} {MERCY} [HP:20/20]
...
>MERCY<
{SPARE} {FLEE}
...
>SPARE<
*The dragon doesn't look like it wants to be spared.
=======================\ |V _ V _ V _ V _ V _ V _ V _ V | |_ _ o _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ o _ _ | |_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ♥_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ | |_ _ _ _ _ _ _o_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ | |_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _o_ _ _ | ======================= [HP:7/20]
It isn't over yet, Bun-B! Don't lose PERSEVERANCE!
...
Quitting...
“Ugh...” A light magenta coated Earth Pony mare sat upon an issue-standard steel-cushioned stool, inside of a dark and gloomy laboratory. The ceiling fluorescents were off, only the glowing, artificial illumination that her laptop provided shined against the sleek plastic of the counter-tops, lightening her weary, and partially frustrated eyes as they sat on her mostly empty desktop.
Bored, tired and wanting to go home, she clicked into the only remaining task still running on her laptop to check the status on the new P.E.L. software update, the bar, (which currently sat at a solid 26%), moving so unsatisfactorily slow that she pressed the tip of her hoof against the trackpad and moved the cursor around hectically to make sure her screen wasn't frozen.
“Ehh...” She sighed again, rubbing her eyes vigorously before letting out a powerful yawn. With a lazy gaze, she found the clock on the wall, big leg at the four, small leg at three.
In the morning.
As she thought about trying to lay her head down on the desk and doze off, a confident clip-clopping of hooves along with a whistle came echoing from down the hall that lead deeper into the lab.
She groaned as the sound grew and her eyes remained unwilling to stay open long enough to look at the pony strolling back.
“Bu-uh-un...” The stallion sang her name as he came into the room, “How's the command centre treating ya?” He leaned up against the door that he entered through, a smile on his face as he looked across the lab at the disinterested mare. He was a well dressed mechanic, his uniform clean and tools reflecting whatever light was still in the room from their shiny faces, hanging prominently from the pockets on his chest. His cocky orange eyes looked like tiny portals for irises contrasted against his light blue coat; he was young, strapping almost. His darker, navy hair looked more greased up than a canister of oil. “Bun, why are the lights off?” He realised, and then asked.
Bun rubbed her aching forehead, “So I can sleep.”
“You're asleep? Wow, I've heard of sleepwalking before but never sleep talking, that's impressive.” He hopped off the wall and trotting further into the room, passing lab table after lab table to find himself in the centre, speaking a command into the air in front of him, “Clide, turn on the lights.”
The lights turned on full blast, blinding Bun for a few seconds, throwing her shut eyes against the desk.
“Don't make fun of my insomnia...” She begrudgingly lifted her head up from the desk and scooted on her stool to turn to him. “It's a serious medical condition...” A smile, hidden beneath the weight of her sleepless head, peaked out for a brief moment.
“Oh really? I'm sooo sorry... But I have a question, what is the cure for too much coffee and video games?” He sat at the desk, on the stool beside her, leaning on the table like a hotshot.
Bun's cheeks rose with her grin, her droopy eyes slowly adjusting back to the sun's level of brightness in the room. With a glance at her desk, which merely consisted of a laptop and several empty cups of TreeBucks coffee and then a immediate return to her friend's eye-level, she had her answer. “More coffee and video games..?”
“You. Are a freaking. Genius. You know that? No wonder you've been awarded with the greatest distinction any scientist could hope for...” He raised a hoof into the air, swiping it gentle from left to right to allude to the room around them as he finished his sentence. “Overtime.”
Her brows playfully resented that by lowering themselves, Bun getting down to business. “How is Odin doing?”
He wiped his hooves with a cloth, brandished from one of his seemingly hundreds of pockets, “Well, I cleaned him thoroughly, gave his guts a check-up and replaced his oil, and he didn't even say thank you, would you believe it?”
“No...” She overemphasised the word as hard as her underslept body allowed her too.
“Yeah, you'd think you would show some appreciation to the pony that has to brush your teeth for you with a file... So, what have you been up to?”
Without turning her head, or even trying too hard, she clicked the mouse button beneath her trackpad, the progress bar appearing, the lightning fast update speed now moved all the way to 27% since the last time she checked, around fifteen years ago.
“Ooh, how exciting.” He pulled the laptop over and closed the window, “Whatcha got on here?”
“It's a work computer, so nothing.” She let him go nuts, not bothering to put up the futile defence she pointlessly could've.
“Nothing huh? Sounds like your hiding something...” He turned something on, the monitor angled in a way that made it far more difficult to see what it was for Bun.
“What are you doing..?” She unenthusiastically dribbled out of her mouth.
“Checking your browser history... Let's see, search history...” He raised both hooves up in the air and in the most over dramatic way he could he typed, saying the letters as he pressed them. “P. O. R. N.”
He chuckled to himself, he found the bit far more hilarious than his friend whom he subjected it too. “Huh, nothing. You must use hidden mode, don't you?”
She was unimpressed, but also enduring. “You are absolutely disgusting, you know that?”
“Yes!” He pretended to fix a tie that he didn't have, “And I am very proud of it.” He wandered back to exploring the mystical wonders of a stock science work-computer, “Ooh, you installed Plundergrail on this?”
“I got bored of browser games, yeah.” She explained.
“How's that going then?”
“Well, it's been fine for most of it... But I'm stuck on the final boss, the dragon dude... And I'm trying to do the pacifist thing but none of the mercy options seem to work.” She recalled to her struggle from earlier.
“Yeah no, you actually have to just beat him up, you can't spare him. Also, he's not the final boss.”
“W-what?” She whined, feeling even more discouraged about the whole thing.
“Yeah, remember the berry bush from the beginning?”
“Him? Oh I hate him.” Her voice dropped deeper as her energy died off.
“Yeah, he comes back if you do the pacifist route.”
“Alright, yeah, I'm not bothered figuring all that out.” A plunk echoed as she let her head collapse onto the table.
“You know there are guides online.” He slid the laptop back to her, pressing it against her right ear just enough to be slightly annoying but not enough that she would do anything about it.
She groaned.
The stallion hopped off of the stool, “Well, my shift is done, I'll leave you to your infinite despair.”
With little reluctance she fired back, “My despair was once a rational number, you're the one who multiplied it by infinity.” She only managed to mumble.
“Ahh, I love you too.” He mocked her with some razor sharp sarcasm, “See you tomorrow, Bun!” He shouted over his shoulder as he left, changing his tone to something that resembled sincerity.
“See you tomorrow, Disarray.” She mumbled too, trying to be louder, but trying was hard.
Bun thought, she just laid in her humble bed as the rising sun caressed the roofs of the Manehattan skyline made of a equaliser-like set of skyscrapers; thinking, trying to connect dots she knew were there to be connected, but she didn't know why.
A golden sliver of the rising sun's rays crept its way past the curtains of the three star apartment bedroom which held the residence of said Bun Button, listening to the morning chirps coming fro- wait. It was morning. Oh fuck.
Her barely awake train of thought skidded to a halt as she flung herself upward, rubbing the grime from her eyes while enduring a stabbing headache.
Her phone's alarm clock was whining at her with the stock alarm noise - which she wanted to change but was always too tired in the morning or she would forget about it during the day - for what she immediately found out was hours, seeing that she had grievously overslept.
“Shh...” She begged her alarm to quiet down, lumbering over to the flank of the bed and tapping on it blindly, succeeding after the sixth or seventh try.
She embraced the soft fabric for a few more moments and then abandoning it to brave the world alone, she slid out of bed into a wobbly stand. She felt her legs want to just give out and let her body collapse to the floor.
But alas she had to get to work, even if it was a few hours late that she would be arriving.
She brewed a quick mug of coffee and chugged it while it was still hot as a wake up call. She managed to get out of the door in a few minutes, the bitter taste of discounted Bran Apple coffee still remnant in her throat as she made it out onto the street.
Bun found a pleasant and unexpected upside as the regular morning rush of ponies barraging past each other on their daily commute had long gone, leaving her trot to the train station and ride to work comfortably unclaustrophobic.
She arrived at the Robotics and Emotional Intelligence Research Centre just before mid-day. The nondescript gray block of a building was slipped between a mucky drug store that hasn't been opened since last October when it was investigated by the police for a reason nopony has bothered to find out what it exactly was, and one of those pizzerias that has those creepy animatronic mascots which Bun always felt somewhat slighted by since she's dedicated her life to help building an actually sentient robot.
Ever since the whole Cardinal mishap, the entire field of research felt like a taboo for all scientists and was very rarely and reluctantly worked upon - especially because of how impossible it was to even get funded - despite showing probably the most potential out of any scientific field, or at least that is how Bun felt.
She was lucky that she even could do this as her full-time job, along with her six other members of staff who all vigilantly fought for the creation of artificial robotic life.
Bun found her key and made her way inside. The facility was a cheaply renovated office building in a very run down area of Manehattan, rebuilt into the bare minimum of what they required to work. The first floor fitted with a lab and enough computer equipment to create and manage an AI as complex as the original Shy Project created nearly twenty odd years ago. The two upper floors above were left untouched, still bathing in dust left there from however many millennia since it was last entered. This was because the majority of other equipment they needed installed was so heavy that the ceiling would have collapsed above them and crushed them all to death if it was installed up there. Instead they had the military-grade, air-tight sealed containment system that was required by law, built into a basement beneath the original building.
Probably the hardest couple million bits ever fought for by any group of scientists.
Bun made her way to the lab, and while pressing against the door she already could hear the chatter as she finally made it into work.
“Hello, everypony...” She let out just before being hit by a yawn.
The focus of the room dashed over to her, her colleagues nodding from several places around the room. They all seemed to be busy with a whole load of nothing currently. They all looked far too relaxed to have been working while Bun had been still tucked in tight between her sheets.
“Bun, you're back!” A delighted pale-yellow Pegasus hopped towards her with bounce in her step. Her long mane folding back atop her forehead on arrival at Bun’s hooves, covering her eyes like a pair of fallen over curtains, leaving her to swipe all of it back with her hoof, showing her lively smile projected further with aid of her glowing magenta eyes. Her mood was radioactive, just oozing off of her as it unwillingly infected Bun, forcing her to return the smile, glad to see Goldwing again.
“Hey G-wing, sorry I'm late, I overslept.” Bun said with half of her attention honed onto the erratic Pegasus, the other half on shutting the door behind her.
Goldwing began speaking, slowly losing herself in her own words in excitement. “That's fine, thank you for staying over late and doing the patch, I was able to analyse Odin's new mental ability, at least in its offline mode, and the new interpretation matrix looks really cool. I have all of the regular tests ready and also have finished constructing the new ones you wanted, so they're all ready right now.”
Being one of the only two ponies allowed to be alone with Odin she had to perform all of the tests with him. “Sweet, I'll be going down to Odin in a bit, just let me check in on everypony else.”
“Oh yeah of course, just chat to me whenever you want to get started.” She nodded delightfully.
Bun gingerly tapped over to the collection of the other three workers huddled together over a table. Even more specifically, a laptop spitting out some verbs and nouns synchronised with an array of flashing light Bun couldn't perfectly make out from the distance she was quickly closing. Yet whatever was playing she felt a great familiarity with, almost a subconscious nostalgia.
“What are you three doing, watching?” She asked, a tad bit curious, a fair bit careful and very concerned that she was going to regret asking.
“Flower, aka, your childhood, the documentary.” A wise-cracking, smart eyed dark-gray stallion twirled around with the grace of a ballerina resisting arrest from the royal guard.
Ah yes, the feature length documentary covering just how much ponies the AI Cardinal managed murder in her short, less than a week reign in the real world. Which had the occasional cameo of Bun Button, who had the privilege of being one of the only ponies Cardinal both cared about and also didn't get shot, stabbed or burnt alive from the inside. Bun sighed, displeased. “And, Prism, can you explain to me why you are watching that, at work... Again?”
“Well the apparent demon, which has the final say about the wifi, blocks any entertainment platforms; we've gotten bored of listening to a bunch of morons report on the space launch on the news as they've been doing for the past month. Trying to hype up the public for yet another space ship that'll explode once it gets out of the atmosphere... And you haven't exactly been here to tell us what to do either. So, we resorted to searching the DVD cabinet, and apparently, several hours of watching a robot ''learn the meaning of love'' seen through the lens of bad editing and shitty interviews is more interesting than what I voted for. The Fallout in Equestria movie - which despite being a film made for entertainment purposes, unlike this historical documentation - is not what we're watching.” The end of his rant had found the focus turned towards his fellow viewers, who were both ignoring him, heavily invested in this documentary. One of which was even piping up to retort his statement, “Shh, the best part is coming up.”
Meanwhile, Bun was still displeased. “Hey! Firstly, I'm not a demon, okay? I just don't want you all being distracted by cat videos, or whatever you watch online, while you're supposed to be working. And secondly, Goldwing didn't need me here to work, why do you?”
“Because G-wing is crazy, Bun, you know this.”
“He's not wrong!” Goldwing's voice came over in the form of a jolly yell from her workstation as she coloured in funny shapes onto small cards for SCIENCE! All thanks to her Pegasus ears, which allow her to creep on her friends conversions twenty four seven.
Bun rolled her eyes, not surprised yet still somewhat cheered up by Goldwing's sincerity. “All right, well, turn that off and get off of your asses because I want to see some stability tests on the new patch, all right?” She clapped her hooves together, “Come on, chop chop.”
“Fine...” Prism got up with the enthusiasm of a dead fish, the others also reluctant to unglue themselves from the screen.
Bun watched with pride as she commanded her unit so brilliantly, (even though she really didn't, but that's how it felt to her). Then, with a tall chin, she prompted Goldwing, “G-wing, I'm going to start-up Odin, you can come down with your new tests whenever, ‘kay?”
She got in return substituting for a response, a wing with a feather raised high in the sky, giving a ''gotcha'' signal without her having Goldwing lose her concentration.
And then, grabbing her notepad and pen, Bun made it past the barrier of a dull grey door. Then she practically pranced all the way down to the small blocky staircase, winding down into a several ton heavy security door, where she punched the fifteen digit combination in as if the buttons were tiny whack-a-moles popping out at her. Needless to say she really did enjoy speaking with Odin and running him through tests. It made her day, every day.
The seal of the door pressurised, poofing open all science-fiction like with the swoosh and pffttt as it was yanked to the side. Thus revealing a highly maintained, short corridor leading to a regular old fashion door-knobbed door, like that of a very warm home. The door contrasting like black paint over a white canvas of future-y, pale wall panels. She trotted right up and... Knocked.
Bun waited at the door, as if somepony wa-
“Come in.” A very un-intrusive, choppy, digitised voice came projecting from inside, calm and clever, but still kind.
Bun twisted the door's knob open and trotted into the wooden-panel floored, log-walled cabin look-alike assembled beneath the earth. Everything from a hearth to a hay-stuffed bed made this place a cosy little home. And against the far wall in the center there was a little writing desk being occupied by a smiling automaton.
He was a pale-silver, his body in patches made of steel plates with slight partings between joints to allow for movement. They were molded into the exact image of an earth pony; a reasonably built-up stallion with a fair dark mane coming from his forehead to the back of his neck in a uniform cut, it also made of steel. His head was turned to Bun, his eyes pitch black spheres with a light blue firefly bouncing around each of them, currently focused on his visitor.
“Hey, Odin!” She grinned, happy to see her beautiful creation wide awake.
“Hello, Bun. How are you today?” He pronounced with the most exquisite grammar, timing and tone. Like a poet.
“I'm great, a bit tired because I overslept; it's why I'm late, but how are you feeling? We've uploaded the new P.E.L update into your framework.”
“Is that what it has been? I woke up feeling quite different; I felt struck with creativity, so I went over to my desk to go and write some of my thoughts down.” He statically motioned towards his desk, filled with perfectly aligned papers stacked up together.
Bun hopped over, looking at the stacks and stacks of paper, the top one seemingly filled completely to the brim with cursive writing from port to star-port; an ocean of words. “How much... Did you write?” She laughed a little, only a tiny bit freaked out.
“99,999 words exactly, you had just interrupted me as I was about to break sextuple digits.” He smiled, seeing that Bun was impressed.
“How long did that take you?” Bun felt quite proud; Odin rarely wrote before this.
“Three hours, twenty eight minutes and eleven seconds, although that is just an approximation of course.” He pushed against the desk to slide his seat out, giving him room to stand onto his metallic hooves, apparently not bothering to finish that one hundred thousandth word. “Are we going to be doing any tests today?”
“Yes, once G-wing gets them down here, but we can just talk for now.” Bun and Odin, without need for communication as it came as second nature to them, sat down on the floor in the very center of the room on the carpet, making a soft and easy resting spot for them to work.
“What have you changed in my code, if it is alright that I ask?” He politely requested.
“Oh of course, you know how we've been really pushing that creative drive?”
“Yes, I am quite familiar.”
“Yeah, well Eli and Prism decided to try getting the already expansive thought-complex system we've been using for your creativity before, but it was too static. So, they've started getting like transcripts of philosophy and opinion pieces and stuff like that and created an algorithm that can generate new ideas, using a double-take expression matrix to make sure the ideas make sense, and then mapping the patterns onto your creativity unit...” Bun realised that she had started doing hoof-gestures, and felt kind of embarrassed by how much of a nerd she sounded like. “Now I realise that all just sounds like a bunch of interchangeable, nerd, computer jargon, but hopefully that answered your question.” She let loose an awkward grin.
“That did, thank you.”
“Ok, good. Can you please run a self-diagnosis for me?” She slid the pen out from her notepad and gripped it in her jaw, hoisting up the pad with the base of her hoof acting as an easel.
Odin's eyes dulled into a grey, the pupils disappearing and his head stiffening. “Core temperature stable, CPU usage rising as high as 88%, Harmony energy unexpectedly boosted by 138%. Emotional Complex reading; Happy, excited, curious. Cardinal True Emotion test result; 87% accuracy.” He then blinked with his fabric eyelids, his eyes returning to their normal state.
Bun finished scribbling down numbers and dropped her equipment onto the carpet, smiling at Odin. “That is great, you're making real progress. We might need to upgrade your CPU soon before it starts peaking; I'll need to talk to Disarray to see if we can afford it in the budget.”
“BUN!” Goldwing screamed from outside the room, bursting in with the force of a charging elephant, a box tucked in under her wing. She skipped over to Bun and placed the box down at Bun's flank, looking like she had just planted a bomb with her enthusiasm, “Done.” She gave a quick smile and then bolted out once more, the huff of air produced by her wings dashing blowing Bun's already displaced mane down her face, covering her vision.
Bun swept her mane away and gently picked up the pale cardboard box. Sliding the lid off, she saw the arrangement of physiological experiments she could perform; most of them involving interpretation, emotions or abstract logic. She made her pick, taking out a stack of several sheets of printed-on paper with images of funny looking splotches of black ink.
“Alright Odin, let's start with a Rorscanter test.” Bun lifted up a sheet of paper from the stack into her mouth and hanged it like a puppy with a leash that wanted to be walked. She managed to mutter to him, “What do you see?”
He looked at the inky mess on the page, inspecting it with great care before making up his mind.
“I see... A butterfly.”
“Good.” Bun dropped the card, wrote down his answer and picked up another.
“What do you see?”
“A word?” Disarray requested the moment he pushed through the entrance door, staring at Bun with uncharacteristically worried eyes.
Bun and Goldwing were currently in the middle of writing up all of their surprisingly positive results of the latest tests Bun had just performed with Odin a few hours ago on their laptops; the time was now crumbling down into the evening, their regular work shift nearly over. Bun nodded to Goldwing, telling her to continue as she stood up and jogged up towards the door, really perplexed by Disarray, “Where were you? You've been out all day! I've been calling your phone, why haven't you picked up?”
“Bun can we speak in private?” He whispered from behind the door, his face partly revealed behind the slim crack.
“Sure, what's up?” She opened the door and shut it behind her as the two of them pressed into the entrance hallway, his worry affecting her now.
“I was called in by Starlight Glimmer to the Equestrian Science and Technology office; they're cutting our funding.” He got it out plain and simple, his devastation echoing from the moment he was told.
“W-what?” Bun didn't believe it, “Why? We're so close! Why would they do that to us?”
“They don't think it's worth pursuing anymore, with all of the other green-energy sources nowadays, they don't really care about emotion based energy generation anymore. And you know they've never cared about making a sentient AI... I argued for hours, but they wouldn't budge, I'm so sorry. We're going to have to start doing some crowd funding, and I'm sorry I didn't pick up my phone; it died and I was in too much of a rush to charge it.” He sighed, finding a small amount of relief in getting all of that off his chest.
“B-but! We're going to need new parts for Odin! We can't afford that on crowdsourcing! We barely can afford it now!” She shouted in a whisper, trying to keep her voice down while uncontrollably expressing her rage.
“I'm sorry, we're just going to have to start making cut-backs. I'm going to try to get a campaign planned tomorrow, but right now we have to figure out how to tell the rest of the guys.”
Bun's heart sank, her eyes almost watering up at the thought of losing her dream. “We can't tell them...”
“Do you think so?” He said with a painful knowledge and acceptance of what she was about to argue.
“It'll break their hearts; maybe after me and you work through a plan, but let them have tonight, we just made a lot of progress and everypony is really hyped, let them ride out the high.” Bun recollected herself, wiping her eyes and straightening her hair.
“Alright, that sounds fine.” Disarray agreed, the two of them trotting into the lab. Everypony's attention soon went to Disarray, greeting him back to work and prodding him a little on where he's been, although he just dismissed the questions.
They spent the rest of the day finishing a catalogue of their results and having some full-group discussions on how they are going to make more progress towards Odin feeling true emotion. All of them going home at about six in the afternoon; all of them except Bun that is, who had decided she would try make a head start on that crowdsourcing scheme. Editing their website with a statement and plea for donations, trying to get the word out on social media and emailing the Manehattan Journalist Society to try and get a story published about their need.
And it was about eleven thirty in the afternoon, midnight steadily closing in on her when she really started feeling the tiring force of insomnia wrap it's cold claws around her mind.
So, obviously she began mindlessly scrolling through the posts online, not particularly paying attention to anything as it flew out of her screen like a rocket blasting upward; each meme, advertisement and news story just- huh, I wonder what this is. Zipped through her mind as she clicked on some article about the Nexus Space Institute.
Nexus has been attempting to break the limits of the world Equestria sat upon by travelling into the dark void known as ''space''. Their first successful launch was fourteen years ago, using a ship known as the ''Dasher-R''. It was a pony-driven firework aimed right into the sun, seeing if they could land upon its fiery surface using some of the most powerful modern fire-protection magic they had; the type of stuff that allows ponies to swim in volcanoes. Although once the ship had gone out far enough, the reception was too bad to maintain a signal, meaning there was no actual up-close footage of any kind of how the fire-proof spacecraft was exploded by a solar ray the size of Manehattan, which shot out from the sun's surface and sniped the aircraft, knocking it right out of the sky, like if the sun had just swatted a fly.
Attempt two fared no better. Four years after their maiden launch, they sent out the ''Spitfire-A'', this time aiming to land on the moon. Despite their extensive improvements on the video and audio streaming over extreme distances, once they launched the ship and it got too close to the moon, something intercepted their signal. Now there is only telescope footage of the Spitfire-A being turned into dust as if it was just snapped out of existence; the pony pilots being killed again.
The headline Bun was now staring at? Well, apparently they were going for round three.
NEXUS FACES MORE DELAYS IN LAUNCH, AI PILOT FAILS IN TESTS.
Today in an exclusive interview with the lead engineer and manager of Nexus, Princess Twilight Sparkle's son, Matrix Sparkle, he confessed the reason why this launch has taken nearly a decade and might take much longer. “We've been working on an AI to steer the ship in place of a pony.” Matrix says, concerned that if anything were to go wrong, that they would not want to lose the lives of another crew. “Even though we're aiming to fly in a path that avoids getting into range of either the sun or moon, which should mean there would be no force to destroy the ship or ruin our signal, we still cannot be too cautious.” But concern for ponies lives is not the only reason they are planning on using an AI, Matrix continues; “It would also means we don't have to worry about things like landing the rocket back home afterwards; we can just set it off into the cosmos and forget about it, and then it will be out there just gathering data like we've never had access to before.” But sadly, creating an AI sophisticated enough to fly a spaceship is not as simple as it sounds. “We've been developing it for several years now, but we've had little success. Very few of the iterations could even pass a driving test with a car. But we are confident, since this is the last hurdle before we are ready to launch, that after perhaps two more years of development we'll be ready to make history.”
So, is the timeline of two years going to be hit? Will the rocket leave the atmosphere intact? Will a living pony ever get to experience being in space without dying? Us here at the Manehattan Journalist Society will keep you in touch with all latest developments.
Written by π, @PiMJS. Contact: (313) 515-8772
Bun crossed her eyes... AI? They can't figure out AI?
She slyly slid her phone up, searching up the contact details of the Nexus Space Institute. Within minutes she found herself holding her phone to her ear, listening to a buzzing tone come in and out as the pony on the other end went to answer.
“Hello, you have reached the front desk of the Nexus Space Institute, how can I help you?” A gentle feminine voice projected through the speaker.
“Hi, my name is Bun Button, I'm a robotics engineer and an artificial intelligence researcher, I've recently heard that you guys have been having problems creating an AI smart enough to fly your rocket.” She grinned like a little filly making a prank call, life brought back to her tired bones as she kicked against the chair in anticipation.
“Yes, that is true... Is there anything I can do for you?” She persisted in trying to stick to her script, somewhat intrigued by Bun's tone.
“Would you kindly give a message to your boss for me?” She was nearly squeeing.
“Sure... What message may that be?”
“Tell him that I can fix his little AI problem, and I have some very reasonable pricing options in mind.”
“I'll make sure to let him know.” Bun retorted another one of Disarray's barrage of questions and requests.
“But, but, make sure that he knows about how Odin can operate without an atmosphere, that means they can have him go outside into space and fix stuff on the outside of the ship, that's important and he'll, he'll really like th-”
“DISARRAY.” She stopped the blubbering pony, “I will make sure to tell him.”
She patted him on the shoulder with the pretentiousness of an elegant feline who just had used the bathroom. Bun then turned to her other colleagues down the hall, failing to cleanly carry a long wooden pony storage unit - which was in reality a repurposed, cubic coffin - but Bun thought that it seemed a bit grim to describe as such, containing Odin. “Be careful with him!” she yelled over as she saw Goldwing stumble under the weight of it, using her wings as a fleeting platform that kept the whole operation going.
“I GOT IT! I mean, it's fine!” she spilled out a reply, standing back up and hoisting the not-coffin, which contained their not-pony back to what some ponies, specifically blind ones, could call a horizontal level.
A lot of ponies stared.
The halls of the Nexus Institute were filled with young and eager engineers - drinking coffee as dark as their thoughts when reminded of student debt - and gruff security agents with slightly too tight, matching uniform shirts which looked as if they were to burst at the buttons if any of them puffed their chests out. And both groups looked on at the six clumsy robot scientists stumble to the front desk where they confirmed, with the aid of a distressed secretary, that somehow they were indeed scheduled to be here, and proceed to push past a set of guards and a pair of now swinging double doors towards the meeting room.
“Come on, guys, you’re doing great!” Bun lied to make them feel better, the not-coffin bumping off the edge of the doorway and swaying back and forth for a few moments. Bun averted her eyes as surprised and concerning remarks came from G-wing and friends behind her. “Array, what room we in?”
Disarray popped his head out of the worrying cloud of thoughts he silently suffered in after Bun telling him off. “Meeting room... Theta?” He read off of the card he was given by the receptionist.
“They can't just use regular numbers and letters can they?” She complained, trying to figure out which direction they were supposed to be going. “Fucking millennials.”
“Whatnow?” Disarray questioned.
“I heard somepony call "the youth" that somewhere, but I'll admit it sounds dumb... Ah, over there!” she saw a room marked with the theta symbol on a jutting out plaque past one corner.
“This way!” Bun motioned with her hoof to her friends as she turned the corner’s ninety degrees.
A scene of the same comedic value as the "stupid and stupider" movie, which released in the latter part of this decade with reviews as terrible as its premise, was left in her wake as Goldwing and her motley crew broke the corner like a race car lacking both tires and pilot.
Bun - regardless of the carnage behind her - had a smile on her face, and it was only growing once she peeked her head to peer through the glass door of the meeting room and saw the blacksuits sitting behind their mahogany table, sipping their Apple Acres apple flavoured still water™ from flat, fancy looking glasses.
“They're waiting for us, guys! Come on!” Bun called out, being heard by the ponies inside the meeting room which straightened their ties and sat up in their chairs.
“Bun, are you sure you’re ready?” Disarray projected his stress upon her.
“Ready?” She remarked enthusiastically; she had never been more prepared for anything in her entire life. “I've never been more prepared for anything in my entire life! I'm telling you.” she told him.
“Well, do you think they're ready?” He motioned towards the speeding collage of pony trying to figure out how to pull the breaks on the pain train that they accidentally created when they tried to sprint towards Bun. They then collapsed with the still-not-a-coffin falling from their backs to lay against the wall. The noise drawing the worried glare of a guard coming down the hall, who Bun swayed off with her hoof.
Bun helped up her friends and gathered them for a quick pep talk. “Just leave this to me, if you guys set up and then stay quiet, we'll be fine. Disarray, you’re on slides duty.” She placed the laptop from her saddlebag into Disarray's wobbly hooves, then she proudly slid through the door of the meeting room.
“Good morning Mares and Gentlecolts...” She greeted the great council of cautious bewilderment.
Although there was one pony who sat in the very centre which seemed to not be fazed by Bun's confidence or the mayhem now occurring behind her as her colleagues threw together the pieces to Bun's presentation. Bun recognised the middle aged yet defined stallion from pictures online, and if she was correct, this was the head of the company and Princess Twilight's son, Matrix Sparkle.
Interesting.
He spoke up, addressing her personally with a striking stare. “Bun Button is it?”
“Yes, it is.” She smiled.
“I am Matrix Sparkle as I assume you know, and these are my associates. I believe you have something to show us... Where is it?” He eyed the several ponies behind Bun in their toil.
“Well, it's right here but I was hoping to do an introduction and all first...” She politely suggested.
“We are busy ponies, Miss, would you mind if we skip to the product?”
“Ugh... Well...” She turned to Disarray, who tried to turn on Bun's slideshow with the painful concentration one would undergo to build a house of cards, and as he got ready, Bun cut across her neck with her hoof, getting across the idea that they will be skipping that part. “Alright, if you wish. I present to you... Odin.” Bun turned to Goldwing who was prying open the casket, revealing a spaghetti mesh of robot parts thrown about despite their once organised state.
She quickly received the detached chrome skull of Odin and then plopped it down onto the table.
Immediately every single one of the ponies behind the desk leapt forward to get a closer look, making Bun feel a little flattered from getting so much attention as she showed off her moneymaker.
“Odin is a fully intelligent, independent and self sustaining robotic life-form. He is able to process information at the speed of any modern computer while being able to act indistinguishably from a regular flesh and blood pony. It has taken years of work to build his intelligence to be as sophisticated as it is...” Bun over exaggerated, but only slightly.
“And where is the rest of it?”
“The... The rest of... Oh... Yeah.” Bun went over to the container where the disassembled amalgamation of Odin's parts were being stored, and with G-wings help, she hoisted it onto the table. “Legally, we cannot have him assembled while he is outside of containment.”
“And... It can hold up in a vacuum? And it's completely self sufficient?” Matrix Sparkle inquired as he scanned over each and every part of Odin, he found the whole to look quite promising.
“Y-yes! Of course.” Bun politely smiled then nudged a few parts around in the case; she enjoyed seeing her hoofywork admired.
“We'll have to get the papers done to begin testing it, but if everything you have claimed holds through, we'll happily take it off your hooves for a very generous price.”
“T-take him..? Off our hooves... R-right... Yeah. Of course.” Bun giggled through the embarrassing realisation that selling Odin meant selling him... For good.
“Is there something wrong, Miss Bun?” Matrix politely inquired.
“No... Nothing wrong, Sir... I guess I've just never came to grips with the fact I'm going to lose Odin with this...” She softly whimpered after saying it aloud.
“What were you expecting then?” He asked in pure curiosity.
Bun's head fell from a sigh, “I dunno... I think I was hoping we'd build a copy for you, but now I understand that would only be an inconvenience for everybody involved.”
Matrix grew a tender, genuine smile. He watched her with nostalgia and great empathy, then took the two steps towards her and placed his hoof against her shoulder in a strong show of sympathy. “I understand, Bun, when I was a young, bright-eyed engineer, I grew attached to my creations as well... The first car I ever built was so precious to me; the day I sold it, I went back to my garage and cried, looking at the empty space where she used to be... I called her Azzy, and I never loved a material object more than her...” He took a breath and stepped back from Bun's personal space. “But the pain faded... And cars eventually just became cars to me... Well, that was until they became spaceships.” He let out a hearty chuckle to himself, he had let out his emotional side for that brief encounter, being more than just his business.
His fellow workponies gazed upon this more casual side of him until they drowned it out with their deadly cold eyes. He straightened his tie and cleared his throat. “So... Are we in business?”
Bun went to say yes, and bit her tongue before she did. She dreaded the thought of losing Odin and couldn't bear accepting this. Bun's ear was caught by the noises of her crew behind her, squee's of excitement and hums of encouragement were sent to her.
Bun sighed and nodded. “Y... Yes. We're in business.”
“I'm very glad to hear that.” Bun snorted out at Disarray like a wild boar, “In fact, because they're offering five million bits, that makes the pain of losing Odin all just magically fucking disappear!” She thrusted her hooves into the air in powerful motions, trying to punch her anger out against the air.
“Come on, Bun... You know I don't like losing him too... But you have to look on the bright side of things.” Disarray sat down beside her, on the adjacent lab seat, and rubbed her back. “And we'll still have the program, we'll be able to make an heir to Odin with that money.”
“I...” She took a deep and resentful breath, not letting her emotions control her. “I know... It's just going to be really hard to let him go... After all these years...”
“Yeah... I understand. But hey, think of it like this, our robot will be going to space! And even hopefully survive up there. He'll be a hero.” Disarray smiled like a bright star in Bun's interpersonal emotional void.
Bun nodded with humble spark of optimism. “I'll be very proud of him...” Her cheeks pinched up upward in a soft smile just as she checked the time on her laptop. “Hey... it’s late... We should call it a night.”
“You, are... Correct, my boss and good friend Bun Button, let's blow this joint.” He softly chuckled, “I'll go deactivate Odin, he should be done reading over the contract.”
Bun instinctively had her eyes skip up to his and catch him in place, “A-actually... I can go deactivate him. You can go home.”
“You want to chat with him don't you?” Disarray grinned, sly as a fox.
Bun nodded with her eyes shut and head low, trying to hide an all-to-obvious smile from him.
“Have fun, just don't bore him until he self destructs, please.” He hopped from the seat and skipped out of the office.
Bun's heart faintly skipped a beat as she felt nearly naughty for keeping Odin online just to spend some more time with him, but this didn't cause any hesitation in the pink mare. She leapt out of her seat the moment Disarray had gone. She trotted hastily right down to Odin's containment facility, past the locks and doors, and right into his cosy cabin room.
Odin's head gracefully lifted up to warmly smile at her. “Good evening, Bun.” He sat on his rug in the center of the room, a slip of paper between his hooves that he's been reading over thoroughly. “I will be going to space it seems.”
“Y-yeah... You are, aren't you..?” Bun grew a defeated smile and then she sighed it away as she sat down opposite to Odin.
“Are you excited in regards to this matter, Bun?” Odin's calm voice settled some of her nerves.
“Of course... Of course I am... I just... I'm going to miss seeing you.” A sniffle helped her keep composure.
Odin's eyes dropped a notch and his lower lip depressed slightly. “Are you okay, Bun? I have not made you sad, have I?” He places an unshaking metal hoof against her shoulder, warming her heart deeply.
“N-no... You did not, Odin... D-don't worry...” She wraps her foreleg around his gentle metallic embrace. “I just don't... Don't know what I'm gonna do without you around...”
Odin leans over and slips his forelegs around Bun to clasp around her back and she lets his chassis keep her safe, she melts into his forelegs. Odin's processors sparked heavily with the scraps of an idea that could help her. “What if... You come to space with me, Bun? Then we will still be together with one another, and you will not have to contemplate what you would do without me.”
Bun smiled and giggled to herself. “That's not possible, Odin... I wish it was, but I can't go with you... Despite that I wish I could...” Bun tried to set aside the thought, though it grew too enticing not to entertain it. “M-maybe I could be with you in some other way... H... How far do you think you can send a video feed..?”
“My current transmitter can broadcast a video to a receiver up to a maximum of fifty meters.” Odin responded as politely as he always does.
“Oh bugger...” And just like that a little shift occurred in Bun's head; brooding wasn't doing her any good and now she had a problem, but she was a scientist, fixing problems was her natural gift. “Right... I'll be fixing that right away.” Bun stood up and smiled with great anticipation towards Odin. “I'll be right back.”
Odin nodded. “Understood.”
Bun dashed up to the labs, not bothering to lock the doors behind her as she brushed off her care for the containment laws as easily as the dust from her schematic designing equipment. After a few key purchases for parts online - which she had to make out of her personal spending account - she was ready to start her transmitter design.
Of course she would have no issue building a regular old transmitter, she was the most experienced technological engineer in Manehattan for Celestia's sake. The fun part about this little challenge was creating a transmitter that could reach from Equestria's surface to the outer reaches of space and fitting it inside of Odin.
Once the parts arrived, Bun was confident she'd have it done before the workweek was over.
Tonight she designed it, sketching ideas for hours past midnight without a breath of reluctance or fatigue. When she did go home to rest, it was only because she had already three and a half potentially functioning prototypes drawn out to the maximum of potential detail, and she had gotten bored of waiting any longer for the parts to arrive.
The next morning, bright and very early, Bun found herself at the office to pick up her package and hide the components of her little scheme from the others. Mainly because she really didn't feel like being aggressively sighed at by Disarray about how dumbly childish she's acting about losing Odin. And the rest of the team had already gotten over it in favour of the large money settlement waiting for them on the other end.
So, Bun went to work, the days passing like fleeting shadows running from a flame; every nightfall spent inside her little workshop crafting her little device.
Odin was in on it too, he found the whole escapade quite riveting, and not just because a long-distance transmitter was literally being riveted into him under his chassis. He kept the whole thing a secret for her, even practicing his lying ability when Disarray went asking questions about why Bun somehow forgot to shut his doors that night and about the loose screws around his lower abdomen.
That Friday night, Bun had both the transmitter and receiver finished, the two items linked to a specific wavelength and ready to be tested. She retrieved her visor-looking device, like a biker helmet made of loose techno-guts and a plasma screen TV which sat two centimeters from the eyelids when worn.
She brought it down to Odin's room with a skip, “Odin! It's time!!!” She pranced past the security locks and wagged her tail in Odin's room. “Are you excited?!” She looked to him laying on his bed with a fiery explosion of emotion.
Odin nodded once, and very softly. “This is the most exciting event in my memory, so yes I am, very much.” He smiled without the slightest hint of irony.
“Sweet! Run program 'Target Audience'.” Odin nodded and sat up, shutting his eyes and booting up his transmitter.
She grabbed a chair and sat herself firmly down, equipping her amalgamation of wires over her skull and pulling the screen almost painfully close to her eyeballs as she turned it on and squinted at the static flashing her.
“O-okay! Are you ready, Odin?” She giggled like a school filly.
“Yes, Bun, transmitting signal now.” Odin opened his eyes as the signal began to pulse out of the small steel box in her lower gut, and to Bun's marvel, her screen caught the waves and an image emerged.
“I-I... I can see! I can see through your eyes! Haha! Yes! It works!!!” Bun waved to Odin, watching herself wave through his eyes.
After several minutes of girlish giggling and playing with the cool vision trick she had managed to create for herself, she regained her composure and took off her helmet. “Okay... I'm going to lock you up now for tonight and go home, but don't shut down tonight, and don't turn off your transmitter, I'm going to go see if I can get a stable connection from my apartment... And if that thing can get through these concrete walls, I'm sure it'll work while you’re out in space.”
“Sounds like a plan, Bun. This is ever so exciting. Ha ha ha.” He laughed as genuinely as he knew how to.
“Awesome! See you!” She hugged him with the passion of a party pony, and then skipped almost the entire way home, hopping up and down on the spot on the train while wires drooped out of her saddlebag.
The moment she got through her apartment door she bolted to her bed and sat down, kicking at the covers as she put on the visor helmet and turned on the screen.
Within a few split seconds, she screamed in delight as she saw Odin's room once more as if she was right there in the flesh, seeing right through Odin's robotic eyes as he patiently waited away the hours of the night, softly gazing around with complete complacency.
She then let herself fall back into her bed - just like Odin was laying in his - satisfied that in about a months time when Odin would be sent to space, she would have first class tickets. She gazed through Odin's for as long as her ever drooping eyelids let her. Then, she fell asleep, somehow both in her own bed, and in a small way, Odin's at the same time.
Which was really freaking weird to be honest.
“-but it went beautifully! We're clearing for launch this upcoming week. Now that Odin has passed all the tests, he'll be flying into the great void incredibly soon... They're estimating this weekend!” Goldwing spun around the room in a flurry of joy.
Bun's shoulders jumped up and down in laughter, “That is great to hear, G! Haha...”
“Come on! Let's all celebrate! I say a round of cider at the Free Spirit! What about you guys?!” Goldwing's eyes bounced around the lab, getting nods from each and everypony. “Yay!!” She hopped out the room, quickly bringing her friends out of the droopy old lab and out into the bustling streets, Disarray hanging in the back with Bun to exchange dumb sly glances back and forth.
“Haha... You know, you've been acting quite a bit more chirpy than you did a month ago when we first decided to sell Odin.” Disarray lifted his chin up, holding something in his head with great dickish pride.
“Y-yeah...” She blushed lightly and averted her eyes, being the least suspicious. “I just got over it... I guess. Looked on the bright side of things... You know.”
Disarray smiled and solemnly shook his head, “If you say so, I thought that it was the fact you were sleeping regularly again now that you’re finished your transmitter.” He stuck his tongue out at her, not bothering with even the bare concept of elegance.
Bun lightly jumped, but then giggled, “So you know huh..?”
“Odin isn't a very good liar.” He smirked devilishly.
“True...” Bun sighed with the intensity of a butterfly flapping its wings. “You're not disappointed in me because I can't let Odin go?” She asked with genuine unassurance to what he'd answer.
“Nah... I'm not disappointed, son, I'm just mad at you. Hehe...” He shook his head playfully, “But in all seriousness, I don't really care as long as it doesn't hurt the job, and it was kind of fun to watch you completely forget security cameras exist. I thought I'd just let you enjoy having ‘gotten away with it’ for a few weeks.”
Bun flushed red and lowered her eyes down to the pavement as they walked to the bar, “Well... Thank you then.”
“Just promise me you wont do anything dumb, cause I'm keeping an eye on you.”
Goldwing whinnied at the front of the pack as they came up the final paces to the bar.
Bun smiled gently and kindly peered up to the heavens above, “I promise... I won't do anything dumb.”
Disarray watched her intently and erupted in a laugh as she finished, “Holy shit! Did you have to say it in the most foreshadowy way possible? Like, that tone was like, straight out of a movie or something where they just cut to you immediately planning something dumb, Fucking Celestia... Haha...”
“Hehe... I'll try to be less dramatic next time then.” Bun stuck out her tongue at him as they entered the bar, now wondering if she would manage to keep her promise.
“Sounds great!” Bun stumbled a step, readjusted her phone to her ear with the shoulder she held it with and leaned up against her apartment wall for support as she used her other leg to equip a saddlebag. “Look, Disarray, I'll see it when I get there, I can’t walk and talk on the phone. H-haha, yeah, see you!” Bun flicked her phone with her nose to end the call and she slipped it into her bag.
Bun trotted down her apartment floors to the main door and she spilled out onto the street into the river of ponies trotting down the massive asphalt corridor. Like any early workday morning, the streets were nearly bursting, Bun being caught in the flow and traveling down towards her train station.
She was quite attuned to brushing shoulders with the strangers harmlessly passing her by. The potential of thievery was always something a wise pony kept in mind while travelling down bustling city streets, which is why Bun always kept a close eye and hoof over her saddle bag while trotting in crowds.
As her paranoia padded her bag down approaching the station, she averted her gaze from the incoming pony traffic for a brief fraction of just a split half-second, and barely even that, and of course she ran face first straight into another pony. Clonking her head against another's, Bun fell straight on her ass, her bag falling off and her phone, laptop and several other possessions spilled out like guts from a fish.
“Ugh...” Bun rubbed her throbbing head and shut her eyes with a groan, “S-sorry... So sorry...”
“No, no, it's my fault.” A very soft mare's voice soothed Bun's ear, she didn't even seem phased that Bun had trotted right into her.
Bun leaned down to her bag and sulked, many ponies having to trot around her to avoid stepping on Bun's stuff. “Ahh... Damn...”
“Here... Let me help.” The stranger took a step forward and down and began sweeping Bun's items into her bag, Bun shaking her head softly and joining in to put her things back. “T-thank you...” When her things found themselves returned, Bun shifted her eyes upward to the mare, spotting her deep red coat, bright orange mane like the sunrise and deep blood-red eyes. All wrapped up in a red and golden cloak with some fancy imagery Bun couldn't make out from her angle. (They were pictures dragons in battle, if you must know.)
“T-thank you miss.” Bun stood up throwing her bag over herself.
The mysterious pony smiled. “Please, it was just a courtesy. See you around, Bun.”
Bun raised an eyebrow in curious confusion. “U-uh... D-do I know you?”
“I don't believe so, no... I'd love to chat, but I have urgent business elsewhere, so I'll be seeing you. Say hi to your friend Odin for me!” The mysterious mare turned heel and began trotting off, getting swallowed and lost in the crowd.
“W-wait what?! Hey! What's your name!? Miss?!” Bun took a sigh and softly shook her head, understandably freaked out as she boarded her train. “What a weirdo...”
“What did you just say?” Bun sat down at the lab table with all of her co-workers and friends, sliding up next to Disarray on her lab stool.
Disarray coughed and then repeated himself with a smile, “You heard me correctly, all the new parts for Odin two point O arrived this morning!”
“That's freaking awesome!” Bun kicked her legs against her seat. “Show me! Show me!”
Disarray leaned over to the pile of parts the rest of the team were examining and slid them over across the smooth table. The cardboard sheet stopped in front of her and a mass of several large parts rested on top.
Bun looked them over, a full set of the highest of the high end computing parts all nicely wrapped up and inside their respective packaging, kept safe. She gaped at every single circuit, poking around all the out-of-this world tech with a huge dumb smile.
“O-oh my~ Haha... These... Look so gorgeous...”
Disarray then walked over to a large pony-sized box sitting on the table behind them, it was covered in black tape and several notes reading "Confidential". “And the cherry on top, I managed to snag us the best of the best in robotic bodies, this is a full pony set of Cyberskin Amalgumitron Pony-Support bot parts. After the war where they used robots and then they were banned, they experimented with new, non-lethal models since robots had to be unable to willingly hurt ponies by law. So this was one of the newest models that was designed to work as a field medic bringing back downed ponies from enemy land, and one of the most impressive features is that using Changeling DNA, they were able to make it so the parts were able to attach onto living ponies. So if somepony lost a leg, boom, take one off the robot and now you have a robot leg... They were discontinued after the military stopped using them, they also found that Changeling DNA rotted some ponies brains as well as gave some cancer and stuff... But that doesn't really matter since we're not using that feature anyhow.”
Bun trotted over and opened the unsealed box and looked down the hole, seeing a bubble-wrapped body, if Bun didn't already know this was a robot she could mistake it for a dead body wrapped up in all those inches of plastic marked with a symbol. A circle with the bottom quarter cut out and a single vertical line inside. “Woah...”
“Yeah... I can't wait to start trying to get this running after the launch... Oooo~ Hehe!” Disarray hopped up and down like a little filly standing in front of the Hearths Warming tree the night before.
“Yes, I agree it's quite exciting, though we should focus on the launch, it is tomorrow, keep in mind.” Bun shut the box, nearly breaking Disarray's heart.
He then turned and stuck his tongue out at her. “Lwanch is tomworrow mwa mwa mwa.” He chuckled softly after mocking her.
“Yeah, yeah, you baby. Go pack all this stuff up, I'm going to speak with Odin.” Bun nodded to everypony and trotted down to a free desk in the back where her visor sat. She plopped down her saddlebag onto the table and slid out her laptop along with a strange, unfamiliar device. It looked like a chip attached to a small pink crystal with a small paper note carrying it, Bun jumped and leaned back with a keen eye. “What..?”
She picked up the note and unfolded it once, revealing a small message.
For containment and mechanical reintegration of the soul.
Bun Button; in regards to the upcoming events, we have decided to trust that you will continue to serve the moon and so this item has been provided. Sincerely, The Dragon.
“O-oh... That... Huh...” Bun looked in her bag to check, and all her regular items were there, and no other surprises either.
“Whats up Bun?” Disarray walked over and gingerly placed down the new robotic body near the lockers by the corner.
“W-well... I bumped into a mare today... And... She slipped this into my bag.” Bun lifted the note and device to Disarray.
Disarray leaned down to the odd object, “This looks a lot like Odin's Thought Matrix... A better, newer model than we used for Odin in fact... Don't know what the crystal is doing there though.”
“The note said it's a "soul containment" thing...” Bun's spine shivered with the eerie nature of the idea what she was holding could contain a soul.
“Soul containment? Like, holds dead ponies?” Disarray shook his head in disbelief.
“That's what the note says, yeah... I hope there aren't any dead ponies inside.” Bun gulped.
Disarray took the device and note from her, “Uh... Well... I'll take these, you can get back to what you were doing and I'll put this soul gem where it can’t hurt anyone..” Disarray went off and locked the weird note with the crystal inside an unused crate.
“O-okay... Well... Back to business.” Bun turned on her laptop and shrugged off the weird gift she had just received. She punched in her password and opened up Odin's diagnostics tool.
He was doing perfectly fine, every diagnostic as normal. She then picked up and slid on her visor, sitting up straight on her lab stool and taking a deep breath of concentration before establishing her link with Odin.
She opened her eyes and saw through Odin's.
Bun's voice came in, Odin faintly smiling as his receiver fired with Bun's sweet familiar voice. Odin looked around softly, he was in the spaceship cockpit, he's been there for the past few days, not having to leave to eat or move, after being trained appropriately there was no reason to keep him anywhere but simply ready in the cockpit.
H-hey, Odin!
Greetings, Bun, how has your morning been?
Oh... It's actually been quite a weird one. Got reverse pick-pocketed by some mare. Doesn't matter anymore though, how are you?
I am feeling... Impatient. Current time until launch is 28:34:11.
Oh, Odin, come on, it's not that long to have to wait. Just one more day and you’re in space!
Yes, I am very excited to go. I wish it was today.
Me too... I can't wait to see what śp̸a̕c͏e̢ is like through your eyes.
Bun? I am also pondering the potential of incident.
Odin, please, everything will be fine. You shouldn't be worrying about such things. You’re not going to be flying anywhere near the sun or moon, in fact you'll be the furthest you can be from both. You'll be safe.
If you insist so... Though I... Feel... A chill.
You sure you're not just cold? Hehe.
Haha... Perhaps I am.
Anything else you wanted to chat about, Odi?
No, I'm good.
Cool, I'll chat again in a few, I have a lot of work to do on this new robot... I doubt they'll ever be as awesome as you though, Odin.
Thank you for your flattery, Bun, I will see you when you return.
Se͢ȩ ý̕ą͏!̸̕͠
The audio cut out with a half painful burst of audio static. “E-eh...” Bun took a second, her heart holding a moment before she removed her visor.
“I need to fix that...” Bun fiddled with the on/off switch for a few seconds, then placed the headgear back onto the lab table.
Bun went onto her laptop and took off into her work, she needed to get Odin's old code ready for the next integration of their projects, and make any improvements she can along the way.
The day quickly passed uneventfully, though the crew's energy was at a record high as tonight's launch, the Nexus Space launch drew ever nearer. It was roughly five thirty and fifteen seconds PM, or something like that, and the engineers had spent the day figuring out how to make all the new parts twitch and turn, while Disarray spent his time cleaning the hinges and performing the assembly required portions of the robot body. Bun saved her work thus far. It'd be only a few days before her program would be finished and Odin 2.0 would be born; name yet to be decided.
But that was a later issue, as in roughly half an hour the Nexus rocket containing Odin would be flung out of the atmosphere.
The crew spurred together around Disarray's laptop, all except Bun who quickly went back to her headset visor, throwing it on and then sliding over on her rolling chair to the rest.
“Aww! I'm so excited!!!” Bun kicked in her chair.
“I know right?! And I'm not even as lucky as you, getting front row seats. Hehe~” Goldwing didn't take her eyes off of the livestream, a large counter going down a second at a time with a whole chat flooding with meaningless comments flying off the screen never to be read by most, thousands of messages of support and shared excitement, as well as some ponies taking bets on how long it will be until the rocket crashes.
“Okay, guys, once I turn on the connection I'll barely be able to hear you, so don't expect me to react to you guys.” Bun addressed everyone quickly.
“Will keep in mind, enjoy yourself, Bun.” Disarray patted her on the back with a tender hoof and wholesome smile.
“Thanks.” Bun girlishly giggled on the inside as she turned on her visor, and with a quick blip Bun found herse-
Bun I'm scared, Bun I'm scared, Bun I'm scared.
Odin?! W-what's happening why are you shaking?
Something bad, really bad, I don't want to go, Bun, please I don't want to go.
Odin, I'm here, calm down. I'm not leaving anymore, it'll be all fine. I promise. I'm going to sit here with you the whole time, all right?
Yes, Bun I understand. I wish I didn't have to go. Something bad will happen and I will die.
No it won't, Odin, I promise you, you will be fine.
Promise?
P̕r̀o͜mi̢s̶e͢.
And, as Bun promised, he was perfectly fine. For the following thirty minutes at the very least. As everypony in Manehattan and most of Equestria sat at their television screens and nickered impatiently, Bun comforted Odin, experiencing the launch initiation through the same set of eyes as him. Bun got to experience first hoof how they uncovered the rocket and hauled it out from the storage facility all the way to the launch site, feeling every bump and swing as the engineers lifted the shuttle into position.
Around the ten minute mark the console lit up in a plethora of lights, a range of every colour. Most of the systems were automatic or controlled from headquarters, but Odin was in charge of many of the instruments and recording data, and just in case his signal was cut, he had the ability to steer the vessel itself. There were two large curved windows across the front of the cockpit. Odin had about as much breathing room as stuffing inside a turkey, his lack of a need for sleeping quarters or a bathroom meant they had the essentials only. A seat, a console, front-facing windows and a small exit to the rest of the ship in case of needed repairs.
Right through those windows shone the bright clear sky holding back the eternal cosmos, Odin's soon to be new home, and as the counter fell to five minutes left, the cameras... Were on. The Cloudchaser Z was ready to fly.
Bun what is that noise?
It's an announcer on the livestream, Odin, that audio is just leaking from my end, no need to worry.
I see, I apologize.
That's okay... There's just a few more minutes, and then we’re off on our trip together. Isn't that nice?
I guess so, Bun.
Just sit back and relax, you don't have to do anything yet, but enjoy the ride.
Understood, Bun. I hope you are correct.
Five minutes passed, every tick being felt by Odin's internal time measuring device, and it was painful. Bun's voice somehow soothed him out of meltdown all the way until the big countdown started.
10
Odin took a deep mental breath.
9
Bun sat back and sighed with a soft smile, ready.
8
Odin's nerves only faintly chilled upon his friend's relaxation.
7
But the dread was still present. It crawled its way back into him.
6
It was all going to go horribly wrong. It would be a disaster.
5
The void wouldn't stop taunting him. His legs shivered at its eerie voice.
4
His metal heart pounded against his inner chest, it felt like it was melting from the heat.
3
He was going to die. He was going to die. He was going to die.
2
No, no, no, please stop no more.
1
Odin shut his eyes... There's no going back now.
Blast off.
The rocket's pillar of thick magic fire shook Equestria in a torrent of quaking flames erupting from the bowels of the metal beast.
The roars of the fires were met with exclaiming applause, a rolling thunder of cheers sounded throughout the city, it seemed as if the only pony in Equestria not excited, for better or worse, about the situation was Odin himself.
The sky came falling down onto Odin, its soft blue blanket quickly started turning darker as he rose into the vast unknown void of space.
Bun kicked in her seat at the stars started appearing, the ship only took minutes to shoot out through the first layer of the atmosphere. Meanwhile Odin's shaking in dreadful fear was masked by his seat shaking under the power of the flame cannons.
After a few dozen minutes of travel, the first stage rockets detached and fell to the Equestria surface, the second stage propellers firing off to continue their ascension.
The horizon melted away, bending and shifting around into a sphere as the city turned to country, and then to a round beautiful planet. From the Sunshard in the south to the Moonstone in the north, it was all beneath him as he left the atmosphere, second stage rockets detached and the third stage fired off more gentle than the first two, giving Odin the last small push, and he was out, the world no longer bound him.
See, Odin! Ahaha!!! I told you it would be all right!!! That was epic!!!
I... I... I don't understand...
Odin, it's okay! We're in fucking space! Haha! Just enjoy it! Oh by Celestia's mane this is beautiful!
Y-yeah... I... It is quite exquisite.
Told you. Hehe... Oh, Odin, thank you for sharing this with me.
You're welcome, Bun... I'm... Sorry for my panic earlier.
All forgiven.
Come in, Cloudchaser, this is Mission Control do you Copy? over
C-Copy, Mission Control, captain od̶in̸ here over,
Hehe... Um... That's a funny way to say your name, Odin.
¿How's it looking up there Whatss your readings like, od̶in̸ over
eVerything good, mission Control all readings n̡͟͞͡o͏͢͏r̴̨͞m̶̵̨͝͏ą̵̛͜l̕͟
Odin... Ahh... T-that's hurting my ears... Fuck... W-what are you doing? What’s happening with mission control..?
gooD oT here odin CCaptian . keeep us postde
affF.F̟i͔͎̫͖̩͞r̸̰̣̜͉m͍̞̫̼̮̬̟a͝t̫̘͕͙͠i̡v̦̖̬͇̬͖ͅe
Aaaggrhhh!!! Odin!! For fucks sake!!
b-bbunn w-what'd wrogn;
u-uuh C̸̣̪̜͕͚̤ļo̜̭͖̜͈̜͟u͍͚̤̱̬ͅd̹̭̪͖̝̭c̸h̛̞͉̘̹a̠̱̫̗͓͎͕s̫̩e̞͖͔͖̱̣͉͡r̥̘̟͓̟ eW aave aCtivity:
It began as only a faint distortion in the audio, though she merely was a pony falling into an impending surge of Chaos, initially what seemed so far drew nearer, every second that went on it grew in intensity exponentially, until she could no longer even hear Odin or mission control.
She screamed, writhing in her seat, trapped there without hope for escape.
Odin was informed by mission control about sun and moon’s activity, both of the magic giants in space attacked like never seen before. While their other space ventures at least made it about ninety percent of the way there before the galactic entities reacted, The Cloudchaser Z wasn't even an hour outside of the world's pull before giant beams of magic were hurtling towards it from both sources.
On the right, a deadly and sporadic beam of lightning and molten fire, hotter than the insides of a thousand year old dragon’s stomach, having capability to melt atoms down to their finer pieces.
On the left, a long beam of gentle light erupting from the moon that turned anything it came in contact with into dust.
And they were going to meet, with Odin, and more importantly Bun's eyes, in the dead center.
Mission control panicked and began initiating every defence system they had aboard, the magic heat sinks activating, as well as a thick magic bubble barrier being projected around the ship. It was only a few seconds after when all of their connections were interrupted, their radio signals flaring between an ear burning static to a dead cold silence.
Odin took a deep sharp breath to focus as he heard himself become completely and wholly alone, he took manual control over the ship and began running the heat sinks and barrier, making sure they remained stable by switching power distributions as his equipment began failing.
Though he wasn't alone completely, as Bun still remained connected, her signal to him being independent from the failing ship and small enough to not warrant attention from the two giant planetary beings. The sun and moon each independently went to destroy the ship, the clash of pure Anarchy and Harmony magic from the sun and moon respectively began to fuse into unquenchable and uncontrollable Chaos.
The sun quickly overloaded the heat sinks in microseconds, the shields were shot through by the moon's beam immediately after. Odin sat back and sighed almost calmly, he decided that he did all he could, and panic was worthless at this point. He sat back and watched the magics collide around him.
It was sudden, the very moment one magic met the other, a light a thousand times brighter than the sun and a thousand times darker than the deepest moon cavern was produced to be seen worldwide.
All creatures turned their heads away and shut their eyes, the cameras stopped rolling and every pony in mission control sighed in failure. The light which swirled in between both spectrums of blindness overwhelmed the sight of the ship, and they all assumed it was over, gone for good once more.
Though Odin wasn't gone yet, and he, he didn't look away. His mechanical mind not even being able to comprehend what was occurring in front of him, so he simply saw errors that didn't harm him in the slightest.
Bun wasn't as lucky.
She cried and screamed in utter terror, destroying her own vocal cords, she tried to shut her eyes but the light was too bright and too dark simultaneously to be protected by her eyelids from this immediate distance, and Odin didn't turn his head away to save her. He didn't even know.
Her entire vision was gone within the second, the unadulterated Chaos magic burrowed its way into her mind and broke it. She learned every piece of knowledge that could be known, and then it was wiped from her brain to leave her mindless.
A hundred times over.
Every. Single. Second.
Then, a miracle happened.
The magic from the two sources dispelled, the two opposites completely canceled themselves out... And the Cloudchaser Z, survived.
Every pony in Equestria cheered at the top of their lungs, even Odin smiled and laughed like crazy at his survival.
But not Bun, or her friends in the room with her... Because Bun died. Not just mentally, but her entire skull and upper torso had been evaporated. Her soul became permanently scarred, forever to hold this trauma with her, changing her soul so fundamentally from other creatures in this world, that she finally realised.
She realised everything.
So, she looked deep inside her soul, and she had a few outgoing thoughts.
H-hello..? Y-you there... I... I... I see you now... Oh my... Oh my Ce... Oh my God... W-what... Are you..? What is happening to me..? Bun paused her thoughts for a brief moment, realising she knew the answer to those questions now. But she found one she was still curious about.
W-what... Is your Name..?
“BUN! BUN FOR FUCKS SAKE WAKE UP!!! PLEASE!!!” Bun was brought back into the waking world by Disarray's intense pleading voice. Her soul finding itself trapped back inside a bodily vessel; no afterlife for her just yet apparently.
Bun gasped for breath, “Ah... Wha...” she rubbed her head in pain, her eyes still closed, but at least she was responding.
Her memories of the last few minutes were very vague, the forbidden knowledge she had obtained masking itself within the dense fog of her now literally dense head.
A round of relieved sighs made rounds around the room. “OH THANK CELESTIA!” Disarray exclaimed and launched to Bun, kissing her deeply on her lips, a long, lov-
“Ah!! Ew ew ew!!” Bun knocked him back and started spitting out saliva, opening her eyes. “What the fuck, Disarray?!”
“I um... I just... I thought...” There stood a dead pony, having just fallen to the overwhelming utter embarrassment.
“This isn't that kind of cliche story, Ray! We're just friends not lovers in denial! Ahh... What the hell happened?! I died! How am I alive again?!” Bun looked around the room, noticing her increased vision sharpness, clarity and colour range. She saw that she was on the floor, and that everyone was covered in blood.
Goldwing stepped in front of Disarray, half a smile on her. “We put you back together! Using... The new cyberskin ponybot parts... And some weird soul crystal Disarray found... w-we... Had to replace a lot.”
“W-what?!” Bun started panting in shock, though she quickly realized breathing was completely optional, as she could not feel having lungs. She stopped breathing as her natural urge to do so faded.
“B-but how!!! This fur feels so real! I feel so real! Apart from... The robot eyes... And no lungs...” She stroked her fur, and it was her fur. Every single strand she could remember feeling exactly identical to how it was this morning.
“Changeling DNA... It morphed to be just like the real you.” Goldwing smiled warmly to Bun.
Disarray had finished swallowing his pride and chimed in again. “T-try... Run diagnostics... Just think the command in your head.”
Bun sat back on the floor up against the lab table, then she thought the words. “Run diagnostics.”
In a soft blip, a menu with a loading bar popped up in front of her vision, quickly running from zero percent to one hundred.
“Woah! T-there’s a whole screen and... And... Ninety eight percent mechanical..? T-that's... Basically all of me...” Bun's heart sank to the bottom of her chest like a foal in a swimming pool.
“T-that may be true... But it's still all you.” Goldwing added.
“Yeah... I suppose it is... Just feels a bit weird. So... New.” Bun stood up with a half a smile and stretched, feeling much stronger than ever before.
Bun turned to Disarray with a humbled stare, “You used that soul gem that Dragon mare gave me to save my life, didn't you?”
He nodded, still shy in his interactions with her.
“Well she must have known this was going to happen... So... I guess someone's watching over me then, huh?” She cheekily smiled and winked into the ceiling, not completely sure why.
Goldwing took notice, “Y-you okay, B?”
“Oh... Yeah... Sorry.”
“Good... Anyways, it's like four in the morning and we all need to sleep so so bad so... I hope you get home okay. Night!”
Bun nodded and hugged each and every one of them, then sighed as she went out of the lab, everyone else staying behind five minutes to rinse blood out of their fur, and Bun walked home.
She arrived home like any other time, the only difference is she wasn't tired. Heck, she wasn't sure if she was capable of sleep anymore. So, she just sat down at her kitchen table and took a long break to just let this all settle in.
She felt strong, Bun could sense the new robot blood inside her, nicknamed "Harmony" as it served as a simple replacement for all wiring. Her robotic muscles could flip a car with a single buck, and her eyes could beat an eagle at a one on one Wheres Waldy?™ match.
It was quite a lot to let settle.
But it will, just not today.
Especially since there was a knock on Bun's door that completely busted her out of her zen.
“W-who is it..?”
The door opened, the pony unlocking it themselves with a master key. The royal guard stepped through, cleared their throat, and announced. “This is an official summons from Princess of the Magic of Friendship, Twilight Sparkle. Attendance is expected as soon as is physically possible and attendance is compulsory.” An envelope with Twilight's cutie mark as a wax seal was slid to her.
Bun blinked.
Twice.
Then... Well. I think it's best if you just hear how she put it.
“Yeah, you heard correctly... My name is Bun Button.” Bun tediously fidgeted with her hooves and her belly fur.
“Where have I heard that name before...” The royal guard at the other end of the convoy vehicle looked to the air puzzled.
“I dunno... Maybe the news? Or something...” Bun shifted a few centimetres in her seat, she sat with her back straight up against the truck’s walls in the back on a simple wooden bench.
The royal guard on the other bench shook his head softly. “No no... I think it was in a video game or something.”
“Oh uh... Detrot: Become Equine?”
“Yeah, yeah! That's... That was it. What were you in it again?”
“Um.. My team and I helped with all of the robot stuff... Making it look realistic... As an additional favour they let me play a research pony... I only had like four lines though.”
“Oh well... Cool... That's... Cool. You know, me and my son really liked that game.”
“Yeah, it was. I played it too.”
“Yup... Haha... Ah...”
“Yeah... Mn...”
The guard coughed.
Bun noted that the road was becoming a bit less bumpy. They were probably close to ponyville.
“So...” The guard said under his breath.
“Yeah... So... Hmm... Y-you think we're close?”
“Probably yeah, you know...”
“Yeah... Uh... So do you... Like... Does your son... Play other video games?”
“Yeah he does... He likes them.”
“Cool...”
“Mn... yup.”
Bun lowered her head by about a centimeter. “Sorry I'm not much of a talker... Haha...”
“Yeah no, I get it, no worries... It's... Cool.”
They exchanged looks.
Bun ran her lower lip under her teeth while her eyes settled on the truck’s floor.
In about ten more minutes the truck stopped; they had arrived at Twilight's castle.
“Oh look, I guess we're here.” Bun said with some, well, a lot of relief.
“Yeah! Seems so...” The guard stood up and opened the back panel.
Bun smiled and hopped down out of the small military truck. The guard hopping down right after her, then the two in the front seats joined them.
Bun looked to the sky with an open jaw, she stood at the hoof of Princess Twilight Sparkle's castle. It was made nearly entirely out of thick, perfectly smoothed crystal, which the sun gleamed almost blindingly off of. The magnificent golden entrance was wide and tall enough to welcome in dragons or minotaurs. The colours blended like fluid paint, the architecture immensely impressive, the stone cutting smooth and utterly satisfying, like wholesome fine art. It was a powerful sight, only partly spoiled by having seen pictures of it online like all the fucking time in those dumb ads about top ten secrets about Twilight's castle she doesn't want you to know about.
Regardless, Bun was led to the castle doors and through by her three guard escorts. She found herself crossing the royal carpets laid out all over the gargantuan home, her hooves tingling against the soft flowery fur. She was brought down the largest corridor directly straight, and before she knew it two more guards standing at another glorious golden door opened the entrance to the room they guarded.
Inside stood a massive table, carved from a boulder sized crystal to an elegant set of furniture. To the right side, slightly out of the way, a chair with twilight's cutie mark sat, made from the same crystal substance, though Bun felt kinda weird. As if she expected at least five more seats with cutie marks, but she shrugged it off; her new robot brain must have just been acting up funny.
The carpet led further into the room past the table, rolling out to the hoof of a throne. Twilight Sparkle's own high seat. It was etched from a unique stone to the rest of the castle, a pure white marble that was smoothed to the grain. The throne rose up a few meters high with Twilight's cutie mark on its back in a light purple. The seat had a cushion, and it had some parts covered in soft wool. The entire thing was somewhat inviting and warm, it made Bun smile.
“Twilight will be here with you shortly.” The guard escorting her let her know and then walked off with his compadres, and Bun stood alone.
From another side entrance the clanking of hard metal on crystalised floor rung the air like a harsh, ancient gong. The steps grew closer, their cold nature worrying Bun, putting fear into her heart, too scared to beat.
Everyone knew that the accident at Cardinal forest over a dozen years ago left princess Twilight relying on robotics to sustain her life, Bun read somewhere online that she was nearly ninety percent cybernetic, which she just now seemed to remember as Twilight's face came through the doorway, it's parts gleaming in the sunlight unlike any flesh. She walked in with her legs animated rigidly, every step was in motion to a clock, each foreleg moved in sync to its opposite and hind leg partner.
Twilight's life has been much, much suckier ever since her accident. Her senses were almost lost, her vision missed its colour and life, her sense of touch didn’t have pressure, it was either on or off. She had no sense of taste, her smell felt completely unnatural and worst of all, she no longer had the pleasure of taking a piss anymore.
Over the years, robotic scientists had offered to make improvements to her, but she seemed to detest her robotic form so much, she refused to get any more add ons, she was only looking for solutions to make her more pony, not more cybernetic.
So, she sat down on her throne with whatever pride she had left, holding her head high to Bun, and giving her a soft, friendly smile.
Twilight spoke out, her voice completely artificial, though doing a fairly good job of portraying her original accent. “Thank you for coming, Bun Button. I'm sorry for my complexion... I don't get much sun nowadays.” Twilight faintly giggled, despite well... Everything.
“T-thank you for having me, Your Highness... Um... M-may I ask... W-why did you summon me, may I ask?”
“You can call me Twilight, I'm the Princess of Friendship not the Princess of high majesty, I never liked all that official speak anyhow.” Twilight slowly leaned forward and stood from her throne, trotting up a few paces. “I summoned you because not too long ago my arcane signal receiver was hit with a jolt of chaos energy strong enough to wipe out a city coming from space, but I'm fully aware of how that happened, what confused me was when it then received a second, still shockingly powerful chaos pulse from somewhere inside Manehattan... After sending some of my ponies over they tracked it down to have happened at your work address while you were there, but you were already on your way home at that point so they had to go to your apartment to get you. So... Tell me what you know.” Twilight teleported in a notebook and quill, still incredibly old fashioned.
“Right... Well... Twilight. I know exactly where the magic came from... It was from a camera feed I was watching, attached to Odin's vision...” Bun rubbed her foreleg while avoiding direct eye contact.
“Hmm? Odin? The robot you built to pilot the ship? Weren't all the signals cut by the power of the magic?” Twilight furiously kept notes of every single word.
“W-well... I don't know about the other signals... But mine wasn't cut... Then all the magic came down and... It gets a bit blurry after that.” Bun bit her lip.
“Blurry? Like you passed out..?” Twilight inquired.
“No... I... Well I died.” Bun failed to fake a confident smile.
“Died..? Metaphorically..?”
“No like... I died. My entire head, it... Just was melted to a crisp you know. Saw the afterlife for a few seconds and all... I... I think.”
“Bun... I'd like to ask you to cease your joking please.”
“No, I'm one hundred percent serious.” Bun nodded to her own statement, just being blunt about it now.
“You're not dead, Bun, I'm speaking to you currently. And I know for very... Very certain resurrection is not possible. So what in all of Equestria do you mean by what you are saying?” Twilight's pen lulled as a frown grew on her face.
“R-right... Well I may not have... Died fully... B-but my entire body was destroyed and um... As that happened my soul was transferred into some gem and then my body was... Fixed up... With robot parts... Kinda... Like you...” She blushed, feeling awkward that her body upgrade excelled Twilight's in every conceivable way.
“You... Are not like me... Y-you... Look indistinguishable from a regular pony!” Twilight looked her up and down for any imperfection and gaped, incredibly impressed by the lack of any.
“Yeah... I think it's changeling DNA that lets me look like this... But I'm mostly cybernetic.” She flashed her eyes on and off like a confused light switch speaking in Morse code. “See..?”
Twilight leaped from her throne and stuck her face inches away from Bun, nearly frothing at the mouth in her desperately confused state. “C-changeling DNA... I... I completely overlooked that... I-it was deemed unsafe in the chemical field due to high cancer rates... Though... This may be the solution I've been dreaming of...”
Bun froze up as the Princess surveyed her. “U-umm... R-right w-w-”
“I need to go begin testing immediately; my royal inspector will continue this. Bye!” In a flash of her horn she was gone.
Bun looked around, felt awkward, decided to sit down then walked around a few minutes not confident enough to actually sit anywhere. Only to be interrupted by a neat, official looking mare who came into the room via a side door. She had a white suit top with an elegant large collar and black buttons down the middle, a tiny name tag pinned into the top of her left side pocket. She also had a notepad floating in her unicorn magic, an earpiece in her left ear and a wonderfully smooth white furred body and a neat, square cut dark crimson mane.
“H-hey, hi...” Bun squeaked.
The prim and proper pony trotted like a Queen in her own right all the way up to Bun. “You must be Bun Button.” She smiled... Too politely. It was almost violent.
“Y-yup! That's me... Are you the inspector?” She gulped as she asked.
“Inspector Rosewater, present.”
“R-rosewater..? Is... That your name?” Bun lifted an utterly confused eyebrow.
“Yes... It is? I don't know what else it would be.” Her pen flicked at her notes swiftly.
“Right... Duh... Obviously.” Bun stroked her own shaky leg.
“Would you please follow me to my office?” Bun nodded and Rosewater trotted off with her down the hall and three offices to the left, until they were there. The two entered the tiny little paper-stacked office space and the Unicorn slid around her desk and into her tiny seat.
“N-n... Nice place...”
“Thank you, it is quite cosy. Now, please make yourself comfortable, Miss Bun.” Rosewater gleamed with a perfect white smile.
“Thank you.” Bun half grinned, then sat down, bearing the tiny, ass-annoyingly hard oak seat with a sad, fake, dead-on-the-inside smile.
“Why don't we begin... Can you confirm this is you?” Bun was given a long checklist of her name, age, home address, work address, family members, credit card information, favorite colour, least favourite animal and allergies.
Bun nodded as she started reading down, “Yeah this all seems corr... Wait what?!”
The form was slid away from her hooves' grasp. “Thank you... Now, I have a few questions to ask...”
Rosewater and Bun went on to discuss and recount in great detail every moment of the event she could still remember. The inspector was persistently picky with every single detail Bun regaled her with, writing at least at double the speed which Bun spoke at. Bun even explained her new cyborg body, which the inspector took very great interest in.
And like a strike of lightning, it was suddenly over as Rosewater dropped her pen and notebook. “Right, Bun, this was all incredibly informative... Our field officers have also done their reports through your workplace so we have gotten everything we need to know about the event. Twilight will be very happy as this will be quite useful in our studies.”
“Thank you for having me... I guess.” Bun half smiled, but it was closer to a quarter smile.
“It's very important that we document all of these magical anomalies; it helps prevent future disasters and deaths.” Rosewater happily added.
“Uh... Cool. Glad I could help... Can I go now..?” Bun's legs twitched, ready to be released.
“Well... There is one more thing we could have done. It is perfectly optional, though is... Highly encouraged.” For once Redwater's strong professionalism had a sly tone.
“W-what... what thing?” Bun choked up.
“Oh, just a physical and magical strength evaluation, see how your body is coping after your incident.” The slyness had mostly faded.
“Right... W-well as I said before... This isn't my original body... It's barely recognisable physically speaking... Despite appearances.”
“All the more reason to have these tests done. So, do you give consent for me to begin the evaluation?” She stood from her seat.
“S-sure... I don't have anything else to do...” Bun watched Rosewater glide over to her side as she whipped out some scanner with a black plastic strip that she ran over Bun's body. It made beeping noises and flashed lights on a screen the inspector read from.
“Mmm Hmm... Oo... yes... Quite... Mmm... Very interesting.” Seemed like Rosewater enjoyed whatever was happening.
“What's uh... Interesting..?” Bun asked with worry.
“Well you seemed to have absorbed enough chaos magic to be legally classed as a live explosive... So, very good so far.” The mare set down her magic detector and dragged Bun by the hoof out the door telekinetically.
“W-what?! Am I going to explode?!” Bun's eyes nearly shot out of her head.
Rosewater did not even slow down, pulling her along to the castle fitness facility. “No, of course not, well... As long as you aren't stabbed with a magic igniter, in which case you will explode, yes, though there's no worries, you'd die so quickly it'll be painless.”
“I hope not! I nearly had a heart attack!” Bun also thought it would be a pretty dumb way to end her story, to just blow up.
Rosewater threw her over into the middle of a large matted fitness training hall, then floated over another tool. Some large metal plate box with a counter on the side, a small soft red striking area in the center. “Hit this as hard as you can.” The inspectors face was completely disinterested as she focused on measuring Bun from every side with a measuring tape.
“R-right...” Buns right foreleg rose softly to align with the target, then she reered it back. A few deadly clicks rung as her leg racketed into a position of maximum force.
All it took was her releasing the mechanism and her hoof rocketed towards the target, a flash of movement leading up to a cracking of machinery as the strength gauge flew off a dozen meters down the hall. The only thing remaining being the readout which was magically held in place and detached by Rosewater.
The inspector took a glance at the dissevered gauge, “Hmm... Above average.”
Bun shot pure disbelief at the mare via her robot eyes.
The inspector feigned interest and moved on. “Now... Speed test.” Through magic, a harness was strapped around Bun's belly, it had a bungee rope attached. “Run in that direction as fast as you can.”
“Fine...” Bun said with a half grumble; her previous test's failure to get a good response from Rosewater infuriated her to the core.
“Go ahead.” Rosewater let her begin and Bun exploded off into a gallop with her pent up pistons, accelerating at a rate that would make most drag racers blush. Within seconds she had crossed over thirty meters before snapping the rope holding her back, shortly after which she stopped completely with a harsh grind.
“Fast enough for ya!?” Bun whipped her tail and made a cracking noise in the air, a quite uncharacteristic cocky smile on her face.
Rosewater calmly read from her little speed graph. “Fast enough to still legally drive on a motorway, apparently.” She noted down a grade.
“Grr...” Bun wasn't pleased.
Over the next dozen tests Bun became unquenchably angry at the concept of exercise as every single one reaction Rosewater bore was more underwhelming than the last. Bun showed off her super-equine accuracy, strength, reaction times and agility that could possibly even compete with the top tier of legendary fighters and athletes, and Rosewater acted like this was a regular work day for her.
Bun lifted so much weight that the bar was bending, she broke over half of the instruments used to measure her, and she wasn't even tired after it all. But nothing impressed the inspector.
“And... That's us finished. Thank you for your time, Miss Bun Button.” She clipped up her notes and that was it.
“Wait... Is... Was that it?” Bun really wasn't ready to throw in the towel and just say that was it.
“Yes. That was it.” Rosewater told Bun that was definitely it.
“Fine... How did I do then?” Bun huffed.
“Hmm... By the Equestrian sports administration standards..? Better than should be physically possible under these conditions... And...” The inspector gave Bun the cocky grin from before.
“And what..?” Bun said skeptically.
“And by my standards... Not too bad. Even passable.” Rosewater fixed her collar.
“Passable?! What are you on about! This new body is incredible!” Bun reared up and then bucked in the air just to show off.
“Yes... It is. Which is why I'd like to make you a proposition.” Rosewater started trotting Bun back to her office.
“W-what proposition? Inspector explain what is happening! Right now... Please.” Bun softly demanded, now standing yet again at her office door.
“Bun... You seem to have obtained a powerful gift. And... We are always looking for individuals with powerful gifts.” The mare leaned into the door, lit up her horn and pressed a small button hidden in the carvings of the doorframe, then she whispered to it. “We have blood in the water.”
Bun took a cautious step back. “Who is... We?”
“We may resume discussion once we are inside.” The inspector pressed open her door a few inches, nothing but blackness on the other end of the door.
Bun sighed, knowing that curiosity might just end up killing this cat. “Fine...” She stepped in, being met with a metal floor and an odd echo. The inspector walking in right after and shutting the door tight.
Then the lights turned on. Bun found herself inside a wide, black-panelled elevator with a large solid mirror on all but the exiting wall. It was easy on the eyes, had slick and smooth walls and was very satisfying.
“W-woah...” Bun was speechless... Still greatly, if not more confused, but speechless.
“Bun Button... I am Agent Blood Diamond. I am the chief recruitment officer for The Shadow Service.”
“W-what..? T-the... The what?!” Bun begged for answers with her eyes.
“Perhaps you would enjoy a more in depth explanation.”
Bun nodded.
Blood took a deep breath.
“Initially, over two thousand years ago, the Shadow Service was just a group of hyper powerful unicorn assassins during the Hearth’s Warming war, but after they were officially "disbanded" the newly formed Equestrian government turned the operation into an all race accepting group of spies, mercenaries and agents of all sorts to span the whole world, involved in the search and elimination of anyone the government deems a problem... Which is what we've been ever since... The only criteria to join is that you have a highly powerful and unique specialty. Some form of quirk that makes you different than a normal soldier or government spy - since if a pony wanted to be a special agent they could just be one of those regular boring ones that track down serial killers and terrorists - this was supposed to be an elite group for the supernaturally elite, to deal with the biggest problems before we call in Twilight or Celestia. And as an example of what we mean by specialised power... Take the founder of the whole thing. He was originally a con-pony, until one day he lied to some Zebra tribe and scammed them out of their homes, so one of the zebras put a hex on him... The hex made it so he could never make another sound or write another word. This was to make sure he could never scam anyone else ever again... But... He quickly learned he couldn't make any noise. His hoofsteps were silent, his banging on a door was a negative for decibels and even creating explosions with his horn yielded no noise. And... Being a pony of opportunity, he became an assassin. Quite good too... Until he was caught, that is... He faced execution until the war broke out, so they gave him a deal to become a secretive mercenary, and being a pony of opportunity... Yeah, so anyways, they faked his execution and he went on to lead the first group to be known as The Shadow Service. Oh and fun little factoid, no one knew his real name because he couldn't ever tell anyone. We later found out his real name was Whisper which is both painfully ironic and amazingly fitting.” Blood Diamond smiled.
Bun gulped softly. “Well... That's a lot of exposition... Um... S-so... You want... Me?”
“Yes, I have found you to be worthy of a trial period as an agent.”
“R-really? Why though?! Sure... I'm strong... But I'm not special.” Bun's head fell in a fit of shame.
“Oh... Yes. You very well may not be uniquely specialised enough for us to have a place for you. Though you do have something with potential... Your body is harbouring a mass of chaos magic... With training, perhaps we can teach you to void drift or mind shatter... Maybe even pre-sense but Maverick already does that—Somewhat—Reliably.” Blood Diamond took a relaxed breath and looked eyes forward at the door, then the elevator stopped.
“T-this is ridiculous... I can't be a super spy!” Bun trotted in front of her and pleaded.
“Miss Bun. If at any point you wish to reject this offer and leave, you may just say the word and I will wipe your memory clean of all of this and you may go on with your daily life as normal... But if you wish to uncover the true power of this gift you were given and fight evil... Come right this way.” The elevator beeped and the doors slid open, a long wide lobby opening up in front of them, filled with lovely carpets and sleek furniture. It was very pleasing and welcoming, though surprisingly empty of any ponies. Blood Diamond walked right out, after her fourth step she turned her head back to the uncertain Bun.
“I... Ugh... But...” Bun's jaw was down and wobbling.
“Huh. I guess you aren't cut out to fight...” Blood slyly smiled and turned away her face from bun.
“N-no! I am totally cut out to fight!” Bun stomped out after her in a rage.
The elevator snapped shut behind her, Blood Diamond chuckled. “Welcome to the Shadow Service, Agent Bun Button, let's see if you prove valuable.”
“Y-yeah... That's not going to happen.” Bun shook her head to Blood Diamond, as they had just finished forcibly getting Bun into a uniform and signing paperwork in another tiny office in this underground complex. Paperwork that barred Bun from ever speaking word of the Shadow Service to anyone, ever, or else the chip in her head would be primed and she would explode. The chip which was apparently put into her without her prior knowledge or agreement.
Bun was now in a light-yellow, skin tight latex jumpsuit with a big dumb L printed on her chest, showing everyone she was a "learner", and totally not any other word begining with L.
“Why, what's the issue?” Blood didn't seem amused by her lack of confidence.
“I am not going to introduce myself wearing this... This... This loser suit!” Bun waved her legs like a wacky inflatable wavy leg pony.
Blood Diamond's horn sparked up with its deep red magical flame and picked up Bun by the collar. “We've all worn the loser suit, Bun, now quit your whining and come out here with me.”
“W-who am I going to be introducing myself to anyways?! It's been over an hour of nothing but signing dumb contracts, can you please explain anything to me!” Bun scrambled her hooves against the floor trying to resist, stretching her latex collar.
“When I said I'll be introducing you to everyone, I did mean everyone. You know how the building was empty when we arrived? Well that's because business hours start at high noon, which was ten minutes ago. The other fifty six agents are currently waiting on me to arrive before we can begin the day's meeting! Now will you please stop delaying me, I do not take kindly to being tardy!” As Blood Diamond finished her sentence her eyes began glowing an aggressive, violent red colour. They also flickered like a burning flame. After concluding her statement about tardiness, she ground her teeth together like a wild, rabies infested mutt staring at a baby. She had made a whole transition from the most proper of ponies to ravenous werewolf in a frankly impressive timeframe.
Bun was very scared of the scary lady. “F-fine, I'll go, please don't eat me!!!”
“Fucking... Grr... Good...” Blood took a big breath and then after a big release of air, she returned to normal, fixing her collar with a kind smile. “Please excuse me; sometimes it's difficult to keep control over my Blood Frenzy.”
“R-right...” Bun didn't feel like asking any questions and walked out of Blood Diamond's office.
Blood walked Bun quickly down a side corridor of the main lobby, which now had the clear print of dozens of ponies’ scuff marks having came and gone fairly recently.
The two mares almost immediately found themselves at a large metal set of sliding doors. Blood sparked her horn to slide her permit card against a scanner off to the left, and with a green flash the doors spread wide open.
Bun's view was now filled with dozens of agents of every race known to pony kind. They all sat around in a large circle around a stage, their chairs being long curved white benches with soft cushions. The large hall was lit with soft blue lights and it was lined with nice luscious green plants. She swallowed her pride before a sigh, being led up the room by Blood Diamond.
The room went silent of chatter and every single pony, every single creature in the entire room stared over to Bun with light smirks and cheeky subtle laughs.
Bun was escorted up the middle of the room past the three rows of seats, her cheeks were flushed red and she had a teeny tiny panic attack.
Blood continued to push Bun forward and up the two steps of the center stage, climbing atop it.
There was a single other pony standing there in the very, very middle. He was an earth pony, orangish, brownish fur, a dark brown mane with a well aged face, something like... Fifty one years old, Bun guessed. He had soft, confident grey eyes that made him look like he knew what he was doing. He wore a brown, neat suit - probably as old as him - that fit him like a glove too, and made him feel chummy, yet in charge. Oddly, his cutie mark was of a burning lemon.
The stallion smiled like a friendly uncle. “Ah! Agent Diamond. We may finally begin, and I believe this is the new trainee..?” His voice was like that of a charming and well-intentioned lion.
Blood Diamond nodded. “Yes this is, shall I begin by introducing her?”
Bun Button stood behind Blood, kinda curled up in a ball of embarrassed energy as she shielded every part of her body from the audience she could in a fit of shyness.
“Of course, you know me, I'm always excited to see new faces here.” The stallion trotted around and forcibly shook Bun’s hoof. “Hello, recruit, let me introduce myself; I am Chariots Jobstone, I own the place.”
“N-nice to meet you, sir... I... Have a feeling I know you from somewhere... Is... Isn't it something related to... Portals?” Bun inquired, another strange hunch of hers.
“Heh, perhaps yes! I've dabbled in that field... Though let's chit chat after the meeting.” He patted her back twice and walked off the stage and sat down, Blood dragging Bun to the middle like an uncooperative toddler.
Blood Diamond took a deep breath. “Fellow Agents, I would like to introduce our newest agent in training, Agent Bun Button, the chaos-infused Earth Pony cyborg.” Blood could not hold back her giggle when she saw Bun's stage fright intensify.
She wrapped her leg around Bun's shoulders kindly. “Say hello, Bun.”
“Hi, Bun!” Somepony yelled from the crowd as a bad joke.
“Yes, yes, haha, Maverick.” Blood Diamond went to roll her eyes and barely bothered to get halfway before looking back to Bun. “Just introduce yourself please.”
“O-okay...” Bun took a deep breath, finding something odd in her deepest feelings. There was an energy, an energy which felt sporadic and wild, and for whichever reason right now it made her feel incredibly confident.
Bun lifted her head up and smiled with a deeply rooted pride. “My name is Bun Button, born and raised in Manehattan, as I child I made friends with a living robot and now as an adult I've become one myself. I'm a robotics engineer, one of... Well, there's no need to be formal I suppose... The best in the business. I have personally created sentient robotic life and I also experienced death yesterday... And now I'm here as one of you, waiting for a chance to throw off this stupid suit.”
A stomping of hooves caught her off guard as the crowd applauded, though whatever chaotic energy inside her that gave her that confidence had quickly resided. Now being drowned in applause felt more like just regular old drowning than it should.
“Right, well put, Agent Bun.” Blood Diamond took the spotlight from her by stepping forward, which Bun very oh so fucking gladly let her take. “You will be placed with Theta squad as normal for new recruits, they'll explain all the rules of advancing and whatnot to you there. Until then, just keep quiet and try to listen to the meeting to be aware of anything important you should pick up on. You may sit over there with the rest of Theta squad.”
“O-okay... I will go then... Thank you...” Bun faintly smiled to Blood and quickly skittered down the steps and sped over to where Blood had just pointed. It was the back row near the entrance, and the pony that Blood Diamond told off for interrupting was sitting there along with four other colourful characters, including a burly red-scaled dragon which frightened Bun with a glance and huff of smoke. Bun sat down nearly a meter shy of the next pony from what seemed to be the Theta squad.
The rest of the meeting was then brought to order and the Chariot pony came back up and gave some conclusions on yesterday's missions; Alpha squad had apparently came back from Canterlot after dealing with some numbskull guards who found The Orb Of Nightmares in Celestia's royal vault and tried to release the lich from inside of it.
Mission reports from different agents were held, notices were given along with some new job assignments for the day and a bunch of boring jargon Bun phased out and didn't quite catch; instead she found herself thinking through the day, it was almost like a bizarre dream. Did she really become a secret agent overnight? That's kind of ridiculous - really really cool - but ridiculous nonetheless. She had long thoughts on how her regular life would be affected, would she have to quit her job? Most likely. How would this affect her and her closest friends? She hasn't even had the chance to tell Odin everything yet...
Though she'd have to continue this train of thought later, as Chariots concluded the meeting. “And that brings us to the end of the meeting, Chariots Jobstone, we're done here.”
In a rush of thunderous hooves, everypony stood and went to gallop off out of the meeting hall, Bun looked to her right and barely drew a breath before a set of dark blue hooves from behind her seat pulled her out of her seat at the edge of the row, she was yanked over the back and then fell onto her ass and back, groaning softly in a wince of pain. Her eyes then went wide as the agents that sat along her row trampled out without a care in the world for each others’ safety; if she were in that she might have been killed by just the dragon stomping over her.
“Holy moly! What is everyone in such a rush for?!” Bun exclaimed to herself.
“Haha... They all want to get to the cafeteria, we have lunch after the morning meeting.” A gruff, charming and half-sleazy voice came up from behind Bun, the pony who had just saved her. “Oh, and hi, Bun.” He chuckled softly to himself as Bun stood up and looked him over. He was a decently built Earth Pony stallion, his fur was a dark navy blue, his eyes a soft red and his hair a sleek silver combed back mane. His facial features also included a thick scar gashing across his lips and throat. And he is very handsome and an absolute stud that any mare would want to die for.
He also seemed very self absorbed, so much so that he apparently thinks of himself as a sex-god.
“H-hello... W-who are you..?” Bun asked with a frightened curiosity.
“Depends who you ask, ponies around here call me Maverick, while the author calls me the prick who will ruin this whole book thing for her.” Maverick smiled, knowing he was right.
Bun softly gasped, “T-the... Author..? Y-you mean... Is... Is that who I saw..? I'm not just going crazy?”
Maverick gleamed with a dirty smile, “Oh, you sweet summer child, you don't even know the half of it... And you’re already far beyond crazy, but let's talk it over lunch, eh?”
“S-sure...” Bun took a frazzled breath and released it while standing up. “You can lead the way...”
“Of course.” Maverick trotted out with Bun after everyone was already far and gone. “So, Bun... You’re getting into Theta squad with me and the boys. Everyone else on T-squad is a newbie like you, but I've personally been working here for the better part of the decade.”
“Oh... So you’re like... Training Theta squad?” Bun asked while scanning the halls, walking back through the lobby down a large hallway leading to a lunchroom and cafeteria, most creatures already sitting down and chowing on a buffet of kinda meh salads, good looking carrots and other vegetables in sauce and even some loose scraps of meat.
“Yuppers. Can't leave all you little foals to squabble about on your own; someone should get the chance to watch and laugh. Heh.” Maverick brought them both to the back of the queue for the cafeteria, only a dozen places from the front. Most of the best dishes had already vanished, so Bun and Maverick picked out some simple hay and lettuce.
The lunchmare on the other end went into the steel cabinet and brought out a fresh red apple and floated it over onto Mavericks tray with a smile and wink, Maverick grinned at her and then left to bring Bun to a table sitting the majority of Theta squad. Bun sat directly opposite to Maverick sheepishly.
“So, what're your thoughts so far, Bunny?” Maverick took a bite of the apple, so you knew he was an asshole.
“Yeah just... T-this is all so much... It doesn't even feel like real life... But... It's so exciting... T-though I do feel a bit lost on how the rest of my life will function now...”
“Yeah, the shock period is normal, I was pulled out halfway through a three year prison sentence to be an agent, took me a month to start believing they weren't poisoning the food. You'll get over it, and soon you’re gonna be worrying more about how many people you've shanked this week than anything in your quote unquotes real life.”
“I hope... I don't even know how to be an agent really... Apparently I just have "potential", but not any actual skill that I'm aware of.”
“Yet again, completely the norm. Don't worry your little head, you'll be a killing machine in no time. Very literally too.” Maverick chopped down on his salad.
“H-heh... Cool...” Bun bashfully giggled.
“Now eat up, you'll be meeting Theta squad right after this.”
Bun down to her tray. “Oh... Yeah, right. What way am I supposed to introduce myself?”
“This way!” Maverick kicked through the door of training hall C, bringing Bun in after him.
The ceiling was high and an easy on the eyes pale colour, same as the long wide walls holding up punching bags, climbing walls, and treadmills, along with a whole bunch of other equipment I'm not bothered to list.
Bun walked in with a broad smile; she felt confident again after that nice little lunch, and now she looked upon the other five members of Theta squad chatting in their pairs slowly dispersing out into the room before her.
“Welcome to the gym, Bun, now are you ready to meet the team?” Maverick pulled her in under his foreleg.
“Yeah I am!” Bun's legs riveted up and down with energy.
“Okay, everybody! Formation!” Maverick walked forward and commanded out, the five other peculiar squad members lining up neatly, giving Bun a clear view of everyone as she walked up to Maverick's side.
Maverick slid to the next creature. “This one, this one is called Ace Derby, she's the filly of a bitch who stole seventeen million bits worth of magical artifacts from the princesses' vaults. She's practically a treasure magnet and can smell any valuable within a ten mile radius.” Ace was a rugged fire-red coated Pegasus missing one of her wings, a pitch black mane combed back behind her ears. (One of which was partly cut off by the tip.) Her remaining left wing had a large machete sheathed under it along with a sling draped over her shoulders coated in little gadgets. She had rough dark gray eyes, well worn, with the beauty of every gold coin she's stolen sunk into them. She was quite pretty in a farmer, ranger kind of way. At least Bun thought so. Finally Ace had a slim, faded, brown cowgirl hat that she tipped to Bun.
Maverick moved another place down, “Over here we got Hue Renn, she's only fifteen years old, a very talented pony, her mother works here, Agent Specter Renn. Little Hue has a particular affinity for mental magic, she's currently learning how to wipe memories like I wipe floors with terrorists.” The pony was shorter than the rest, half a head down, and covered in dark gray, blackish fur. A deep royal blue in her girly, flowy mane tied into a crochet from the back down. She had a dark cloak to match her fur with little slots for knives, finally a cute, stubby horn poked out the tip of her head.
Maverick set his eyes on the next creature in the row, the burly, immense red scaled dragon lurched over everypony several times taller than Maverick with hard toned muscles and striking talons tapping at his sides impatiently, he huffed black smoke and his dark green crystal eyes watched Maverick right back. “That's a big fucking dragon, we found him inside here one day and nobody wanted to say no to him so he's now an agent in training.”
Maverick tip-toed around the big dragon, his eye never leaving the beast as he reached the next pony. “This... Is Pious Duty, came directly from the royal guard. His family had a history of... Well...” Maverick took a step to Bun and murmured beneath his breath. “Dragon slayers... Don't tell bitey over there.” He cleared his throat. “And he has some curse or blessing or whatever, yada yada, now he can see living creatures through walls or something I dunno.” Maverick walked off from the silver coated and pale green maned earth pony. Pious also had a sword and shield ready at his flanks and a light set of gold and red crystal stylized royal guard armour. As maverick walked away Pious opened his mouth to speak, but Maverick cut him off as immediately as he could. “We all have origin stories, Pious, tell her on your own time. Now...”
Maverick patted the last pony on their back, they looked like an oddly regular pegasus to Bun. “This is Felix, he's a changeling.”
Bun's eyes rose in shock, she thought changelings were all kill on sight.
“S-Shimmer.” Felix corrected.
“Yeah, whatever you wanna call yourself bug eyes. What matters is he's a shapeshifter so that's cool.” Maverick trotted by and stood himself at the end of the row, Felix grumbled and shook his head. Bun's eyes followed the Captain in deep surprise.
“And that just leaves me, Maverick. I'm like Deadpool except with a horse dick and not as well written.” Maverick's sassy ass smile gleamed.
The very ends of Bun's lips rose into a smile for a few moments at Mavericks remark, some little part of her understood him.
“See, you’re getting it!” Maverick broke the formation and skipped to the front of the pack, turning to them. “Okay, ya'll get chitty chatty with Bun! I've been talking for an hour so I'ma go slam back a water like a baby with bottle of bleach. Peace!” Maverick slid out the room and everyone managed to take a breath.
“Well... It's wonderful to meet you all.” Bun smiled up to them all.
“Wonderful indeed, I say.” Ace took half a skip forward and drew her keen eyes around Bun, licking her lips like a lion would at the sight of a little piglet. “Mhmmm...”
“Uh... H-hello..? Whatcha up to there..?” Bun's head softly leaned back to regain some minuscule amount of personal space, she wasn't used to being so close to somepony this intimidating, and well... Pretty.
“Oh, nothin' partner... Just couldn't help but notice that there gem inside ya... I know a fella who'd buy that for a couple million bits without a hassle.” Ace's smile peaked as they made eye contact. “Don't worry, I'll wait till somepony else kills ya first before I try an' take it.”
Bun was too scared to smile but thought it was appropriate so she really tried her hardest to appear in on the joke. “H-hha... Y-yeah... Um. Well... How... So... You can like sense... Valuables..?”
“Valuebles, weapons, bits... Basically anythin' important. It's based around desire, an' not just mine, I can tell what others want as well. Heh.” The pony stepped back gracefully and held down the tip of her hat to just barely sit above her eye line, basically only trying to look cool.
“Really..? That's really neat... Um... What do I desire then?” Bun asked in an attempt to be polite.
“Oh, heh.” Ace stood down back to ease. “To tell ya I'd have to touch ya and stuff, so maybe sometime later, eh?”
“Oh... O-okay...” Bun released a cute little breath of relief.
“Heh heh... It can also be done by kiss.” Ace winked at Bun with a dumb grin.
“Yeah... Um... Uhh...” Bun began to retreat step by step, softly blushing until her path was cut by the younger unicorn Hue.
“Hey! Sorry about her, I know how stressful being new can be, come talk with me and Fe! We'll help you feel right at home.” Hue hugged Bun nice and tight.
It was a great surprise to Bun, causing her to jump a little before settling into the warm embrace. “Uh... Oh... Thanks.”
“My pleasure, new friend!” Hue brought Bun down to the side of the training area where Felix stood reluctantly watching them approach. “This is Felix, we're still trying to fit in as well! So with us... You'll fit right in!” Hue's eyes lit up like a fireworks display as she slipped to Felix's side and watched Bun.
“Cool... Yeah I've been feeling really weird lately, and that's not helped me being socially awkward. You know how it is.” Bun looked to Felix sheepishly, both of them avoiding direct contact.
“Yeah we do! No worries! So... What's your powers like? What's your specialty?” Hue giddily asked.
“Oh my... Specialty... So... I'm a cyborg... Sorta. And um... Apparently I'm filled with... Chaos energy..?”
“Chaos? That's cool! I'm more of a harmony mare myself, I'm learning how to mess with memories and wipe minds and stuff right now! Wanna see?” Hue's childish smile melted Bun's heart into submission.
“S-sure... W̴̷̷̴h̶̴̴̵y̷̵̷̵ N̷̷̵̵o̴̵̷̶t̷̵̶̶.” Bun haphazardly agreed, immediately feeling lightheaded before Hue hoofed over her phone, showing a selfie of Hue and Bun together. “W-what... When did you take that...”
“Five seconds ago, then I wiped your memory of it! Cool huh?” Hue beamed from beneath her dark shaded cloak.
“Yeah... It kinda is. But I'd hope you don't do that again.”
“Of course I won't, despite if I change my mind I could just make you forget this promise. Hehe.” Hue wrapped a hoof over Felix. “Felix introduce yourself already!”
“Ughh... Fine... Hi...” Felix looked up at Bun with his normal pony eyes, burning with a hot fire of annoyance behind them, as well as a slightly less intense fire of low expectations even further behind.
He then sighed and his eyes glimmered all sparkly-like, turning into smooth, blank, light blue spheres. “Firstly I am not a changeling, I am a shimmer. The differences may be subtle but they are very important. No, I will not be eating your emotions, you don't have to be scared of me like everyone except Hue seems to be. Okay?”
If Bun were to be completely honest, she did jump a little when Felix's eyes changed. “Y-yeah... Okay. That's cool, sorry if I upset you or anything.” Bun uneagerly raised her hoof, finding a soft smile in Felix as he shook it back.
“Thank you. I'm here because one of my unique features being a shimmer means I cannot be detected while disguised like a changeling... So yeah. That's my power...” Felix softly sighed.
“That's cool... You seem cool, Felix.” Bun nodded to him gently.
Felix seemed stunned. “R-really? T-thanks...”
“Yay!!!” Hue screamed in joy like a raccoon in a trashcan. “I made a friend and made my friend a friend! Score for the power of friendship!” She pumped her hoof into the air.
Maverick stumbled into the room after faintly hearing what Hue said. “W-woah woah! Hue did you say power of friendship or magic of friendship, cause I'm pretty sure that's copyrighted.”
Hue cocked her head back and dropped her hoof. “I... I said power... What are you talking about?”
“Oh phew, no worries, just forget I said anything, anyways, I'm back! Now I know we were supposed to begin our work on our next task with the whole zebra town thing, but today we'll be getting Bun settled in, so let's do a regular old combat training session! Woot.” Maverick smiled and began over-exaggerating some stretches. Everyone began to conjugate around Maverick, “Aight, ya'll get into pairs, we're starting with some wrestling, old fashioned hoof to hoof...” Maverick peeked over at the dragon. “...to claw style. Get to it!”
“Fe, you’re mine!” Hue lept at Felix and hugged him.
Meanwhile on the other end of the group, Ace playfully bucked the dragon's thigh. “Come on, firebreath, ready for another round?” The dragon huffed and slapped her leg away with a devilish grin.
Maverick clapped his hooves together. “And Pious that leaves you with meeeoh... Wait... You’re with Bun. We got an even number now! Fuck yes!” Maverick jumped to the side where he landed on a sofa that sat off scene with an iced drink that he began sipping from while laying back.
Pious nonchalantly turned his eyes to Bun. “Care to join me, miss Bun?”
“Yeah... Sure.” Bun trotted up to the green, silver maned burly stallion, his kind, guardian angel eyes settling on her and beginning to glow a soft red. “Um... W-what are you...”
“Just getting prepared.” He pulled a short cloth from a pocket in his armour, placing it down over his eyes to blindfold himself.
“Right... So you can see me through that... Yeah?”
“Yes, madam, very clearly.” He grinned.
Maverick swigged back the rest of his glass and sat up. “Everybody listen up, first things first, I wanna see how long Bun can avoid getting her butt kicked so I can see how much training she needs.” Maverick pulled a serving of popcorn from under a couch cushion and leaned back to watch. “Do the thing.”
Pious Duty lifted his right hoof in solemn concentration, leaning back into a ready pounce. “You may have the first move, miss.”
“I... Um... I... Well... I've never...” Bun shook.
“Yeah yeah, "I've never hurt another pony". We get that all the time, I mean look at Hue, she's like fifteen or something and a month ago she'd cry when she stepped on a butterfly and now she's a little psycho, you'll get used to it, just give it all you got and we'll judge it from there.” Maverick blurted out at her.
“O-oh... Fine...” Bun looked down to Pious standing ready, and she already regretted doing this and she hadn't even started yet. Here goes nothing... Bun dreaded the words as she they sprawled through her own mind as she took a deep settling breath. She pulled a hoof back and wound it up, getting it a few clicks back before looking up at her target.
With a blind eye she thrusted her hoof forward towards Pious, which he could see from behind his blindfold with his cursed eyes. So in the middle of her motion he had already intersected the movement and locked his leg around hers and twisted Bun's up. “Come on, miss Bun, don't hold back.” Pious smiled to her.
Bun opened her eyes. “W-what the...” Bun put more pressure against his grip, though his skillful use of weight leverage held back against her robotic strength. So she swung with her second foreleg, yielding yet again pitiful results as he dodged into the attack and pressed her leg against his torso.
Maverick laughed over in the corner, very much at Bun.
“You can tap out whenever you want to, miss.” Pious softly whispered into her ear with complete respect.
“N-no!” Bun groaned and pushed against both of his grips, her hind legs scrambling helplessly. Ughh!! What the hell can I do?! She screamed internally.
And as if that was a console command, thinking the words caused something Bun had yet to experience. Her vision shifted a deep pink and her body popped up with a schematic of her body and its joints, and her thinking became logistical, as if she was seeing in numbers. She spotted a tag on her right leg's knee, and without thinking twice as she willed the joint to dislodge itself, the bottom of her foreleg being left in Pious' grip, while the upper part split free and struck Pious down by the jaw with the now exposed, smooth, steel hinge-joint.
And once Bun turned her eyes up to the stunned, hurting soldier, seeing his body clearly mapped out in front of her, taking a single millisecond to think, before deciding to dislodge her other upper left leg and ran it up and knocked it into his chin in an uppercut as his face flew down from her last punch, knocking him up and away from her. His body dropped along with Bun's leg stumps, which she promptly reattached to herself. When she shut her eyes and her enhanced perception faded for now.
“Ah fuck...” Pious groaned on the ground. “Did not see that coming... Heh... That was great...”
“W-wha... What came over me...” Bun rubbed her soft forehead, dazed after that odd lapse of judgement. Then when she saw that she had caused Pious to bleed from the nose, she bolted over in pure and helpless need to say sorry to him. “Oh my goodness! I am so so so so sorry! I did not mean to hit you so hard!”
“It's good, miss Bun... I underestimated you and let my guard down. Good fight.” He picked himself up with an honorable strength.
“Y-you’re okay? You sure? You’re bleeding...” Bun whimpered.
“Yes, miss, I am perfectly fine.” He stood up.
“Okay...” Bun still felt bad about it.
Maverick began slow clapping like a prick, “Wow... Now that far excelled any sort of minuscule hopes I had for you doing well at combat, so I'm... Gradually impressed, Bun.”
“T-Thanks I guess...” Bun backed off to the side.
“No need to be so enthusiastic, Bun, we all understand you feel so good after that. Haha... Now. Let's get to training. Bun, get your pink butt over here, I'm gonna teach you how to fight without losing your legs in the process... Well, without losing most of them. Chip chop.” Maverick got up from his sofa and got everyone together and began the training.
For the next few hours Maverick taught Bun the very basics of proper self defense and hoof to hoof combat, which she picked up quite well, though she seemed to pull punches, even when she got to land hits against the dragon, she put him into more danger of passing out from lethargy and boredom than getting a bruise.
But by the time it was over, at least she had the basic mechanics down, so it wasn't completely for nothing. Maverick held a quick briefing after, telling everyone now that Bun has settled in a bit, they can go back to their previous schedule tomorrow...
“Everyone got it? I don't need to go over anything twice do I? Cause I'm not going to anyways. Now out of my sight, all of you. Not you, readers... If you want to stay and let me become the main character that would be just... Wonderful.” Maverick swayed his hoof at the others and smiled all charming and stuff.
“Whatevs, Mav, seeya!” Hue said her farewell, followed by the others as they trotted out.
But Bun had a tiny bit of a problem, so she stayed back against Maverick's wishes. “Uh... Maverick... Can we talk..?”
“Well, I'd say no, but you are female, good looking, and there's always potential for us to be in a clop fic together if I get the readers to ship us... So, yes. Please go on.” Maverick threw a devilish grin in her direction.
“Firstly, ew. Gross. Secondly, I don't... Well... I don't think this is gonna work out... I don't feel... At home, in this like... More violent setting. Everything up to this has been quite a lot... But... I don't think I can hurt anypony... Good or bad... And I'm not comfortable helping others be hurt either... It's just... This... This isn't meant for me. I loved my old job, and I think I'll be going back to it permanently... So, yeah...” Bun sheepishly looked up to Maverick.
“Cool.” Maverick brushed her off hard.
“W-what? But... Aren't you gonna argue? You know how these stories go, you’re supposed to tell me that I can't leave and then try make me come around in the end once I see the "good" I can do or whatever! And... Great. You have me talking like you now... I'm still not convinced that I'm not just delusional.” Bun grew stern.
“Hehe, yeah you are. But regardless! I don't need to argue with you. You'll be back anyways.” Maverick patted her on the back all dickheadishly.
“What the hell do you mean?”
“What the tartarus... We gotta keep with the lore. And... Don't worry about it... You'll see. So you definitely want to leave?”
“Yes. I do.”
“One hundred percent?”
“Yes. Can I?”
“Of course! Hue!” Maverick clapped his hooves and Hue's horn flashed form out of nowhere as she decloaked an invisibility spell right beside Bun.
“Ahh!! D-don't do that!” Bun softly hyperventilated herself back to calm.
“Hehe, sorry! And sorry things didn't work out, good luck in your normal life.” Hue lit up her horn and Bun suddenly began feeling dizzy.
“W-wait... I...” Bun's head slumped down as Hue's magic began working.
Maverick lifted her head up tenderly by the chin, and he looked into her weak eyes. “You won't actually remember anything about this, but for the sake of theatrics... Remember, y̶o̶u̵'̸l̴l̸ b̴̟͛e̶̼̍ ̵̩̔b̸̛̪a̶̲͌c̵͎̈k̴̪̇.̷̱̑.̷͓͘.̵̩̀”
Bun was walking back. Back to her home after her visit to Twilight's and short stay in Ponyville's local inn, having spent the day just enjoying the historic sights and speaking with the locals. It was a pleasant day, though she was glad to be finally getting home.
She had just hopped off of the train and set down the familiar thick streets of Manehattan. It was a bit rainy, though she didn't mind, it was kind of refreshing if anything. The city street lamp's soft lights flickered through the crystal streaks of rain dripping on their glass in the dark. Glowing neon signs encumbered the sky, held up by the skyscrapers of Manehattan.
Surely is home... Bun sighed in succulent relief. As she walked she took out her phone to check the time.
""‖‖/^\ [34%]
[19:24]
Saturday, 19 October
| | |
{New Robotics News From MJS} /-\ Twilight sparkle announces changeling based robotic body-modification research.
Click here to learn more.
{17 New Texts Form Disarray} /-\ Open
{WyndStreme - New Music Video just dropped, watch it right now! } /-\ Click here!
| | |
Slide to unlock.
Hmm... Hehe. Bun opened up the article and read through it as she trotted, very very happy to see Twilight Sparkle opening up to the idea of robotics again, especially knowing she had her hoof in causing the princess's change of heart.
Soon she got lost in a maze of reading the news as she often does, finding that the rocket Odin was piloting is going smoothly as they could have possibly hoped, some beloved tv show had premiered its final episodes, and Bun was half way through reading about "10 ways to know if your loved ones are changelings" when she stumbled slightly on a crack in the pavement.
“A-ah... Sheesh.” Bun eyed her surroundings, uh... It was dark out, she really should focus on getting home. Bun put away her phone and sped up her trot, she always hated walking home in the dark, her fear of thieves was only heightened like the hairs at the back of her little robo neck did as she hastily trotted through the darkening streets.
She knew her way home though, and nothing was going to stop her from...
“Hey, you!” A thuggish voice came from behind Bun.
“W-what..?” Bun turned around in a shudder to see a large pony in a hood.
“Let's not make this any more difficult than it needs... Wait... You’re that bitch from the news, you've got millions!” The thug seemed to be amazed at their catch, quickly pulling out a knife to make things serious.
”W-wait! Woah! Y-you really really don't want to do this!" Bun stumbled backwards in despair.
“No... No I think I do... I need that money far more than you do, bitch! Now give me everything you have, and if I ain't happy, I'm bringing you to an ATM, got it?!” The thug caught up with Bun easily.
“N-no I don't have any bits, i-it all goes to my company, I don't manage any finances! I only have a few dozen bits, just please take them and leave me alone!” Bun threw out her bag of coins from her purse and it landed on the floor, the pony groaned at the sight.
“N-no! I need more than this! Urghh!!” Bun was grabbed by the pony, while she was well able to fight her off if she wanted, she had no way of knowing that yet, she had clearly never done anything even remotely combat related... And so she was helplessly dragged down the block with a knife at her neck, being thrown at an ATM at the end of her nonconsensual journey.
“P-please... I don't have anything, I swear!” Bun pleaded as her own credit card was thrown into her face.
“Open your account! NOW!” Bun was pressed against the ATM as she started crying.
“L-look...” She put in her credit card and submitted the necessary numbers to open her account, showing only the few hundred bits she keeps for her own personal needs, this angered the thug more than anything so far.
“Fuck fuck fuck! Come on!” The pony slammed the ATM's side and dented it.
“P-please... Take it all... Just let me go...” Bun shifted in the ponies grip, which only made the very visible anger inside them grow, causing them to react and knock Bun upside the head, her skin being broken against her chin, exposing a small piece of metal.
“W... What...” The pony climbed ontop of Bun and pushed her to the ground and inspecting the wound. “You’re... You’re made of metal huh?! Do you even understand!? The amount of fucking pain I feel every day! While fucking millionares like you get fancy fucking robot organs?!?” The pony has begun crying all over Bun at this point, bringing her knife down against Bun's throat. “Do you even feel pain?!?”
“P-please! S-s... Stop! Don't hurt me!” While Bun cried and whimpered, struggling against the criminal pitifully, she did not feel pain... At least not intensely, her body regulated her pain senses so that she could just notice the pain, but it was nowhere as bad as the real thing.
“Answer me, bitch! You feel pain?! Or do you bleed? Heh... Ahh... I guess we'll see about that!” Bun felt the pony strike her in the chest, being stabbed by the pony’s knife right in her center.
“Ahhh... P-please!!! Stop!!! Ahh!!” Bun cried out as she felt some great... Chaotic... Energy surge from her wound.
“Hah! No blood! Not a drop, you bitch! Why don't we see if you burn now huh?!” The maddened pony then brandished a lighter and lifted it high into the rainy sky, opening up in Bun's view, right in the center of the moon like a panel straight out of an edgy comic book...
Wait... Bun looked down at her sparking chest of chaotic energy, and back up at the lighter.
Then she sighed.
“I fucking hate foreshadowing...”
The lighter lit, and the magic leaking from her chest erupted with the flame, killing the pony holding her down instantaneously, but Bun was not victim to the same fate. The intense chaos within her blew into a spiral of sensation and sights all around her as the epicenter of the storm, and as chaos magic tends to do, the eye of the storm twisted the world around her, warping the very fabric of her little sphere of existence for just a split second... Just enough to... Well.
Bring her back, duh. Maverick, somewhere, wherever he was, smiled. Bye, Bun!
“Hi, Bun!” Somepony yelled from the crowd as a bad joke.
Bun opened her eyes in a hectic daze, the hall full of faces was endlessly familiar.
“Yes, yes, haha, Maverick.” Blood Diamond went to roll her eyes and barely bothered to get halfway before looking back to Bun. “Just introduce yourself please.”
“U-Uhh... Ummm n... N-N... How... G-Give me a second!” Bun shoved past Blood Diamond and bolted down the stage and out of the hall.
Maverick from the crowd also stood up and yelled over to Blood Diamond, “We got a code four or... Uh... Maybe it's six... Fuck it, I don't remember, just let me deal with it!” Maverick hopped over the heads of his co-workers, galloping right into Bun's hoofsteps.
“M-Maverick, what in Equestria is happening?!” Bun stormed out into the main lounge and dropped against a white-cushioned coach.
“Well... I told... Or I guess since that happens in the future, I will... Tell... You... That you come back, and you did... Does that count as an explanation?” Maverick sat beside her.
Bun growled. “Urghh... Look... Uhh... Just... Tell me... For serious... How do you deal with... The Chaos? All day... It was messing with me, my emotions and confidence... Not even talking about the reality breaking explosion I just became...”
Maverick slipped back and relaxed, “All right... I'll tell you.”
“Good! Please.” Bun collapsed beside his lap.
Mav shut his eyes and took a breath, “First step is understanding that Chaos energy is chaotic. And chaos cannot be controlled.”
“Awwww, come on!!!” Bun kicked the cushions.
Maverick held up an inquisitive hoof, “Although... Not exactly...” Maverick chuckled to his own dramatic pause as Bun was dying to listen, “There is a way to... Direct it... Chaos magic, like any other magic... Can be channeled, like... Put to a similar purpose. For example, let us say there's some chaos magic trying to... Turn orphans into chinchillas.”
“W-Why... Orphans?”
“Shut it, stop questioning chaos! Now... If more chaos magic were to be put into that spell, that chaos magic won't just do something random by itself, it'll channel with the chaos that's already happening. And once you're channeling into that spell, you can suggest it, maybe turn the orphans into chihuahuas instead.” Maverick waved his hooves around to demonstrate nothing.
“How does this have anything to do with my problem?” Bun sighed and bullied Maverick with an eyebrow lift more sarcastic than an emo pre-teen speaking with her parents.
“I'm getting to that part! If you just stopped sassing me, I would have told you already; you're wasting my, yours and the readers’ time with this nonsense, which now that I say it out loud, is basically my entire job so I commend you... Now as I was saying, if you want to channel the chaos magic... You have to become the chaos. An agent of chaos! Like the laughing guy talked about, from the movie everyone likes.” Maverick stood up and presented his message with grandeur and finesse. “If you have the spirit of chaos, then the magic inside you will stop changing you, and instead it'll just empower what you’re already doing!”
Bun was dumbfounded. “I don't get it...”
“Well... Maybe this will help! Music please!”
A jazzy backup tune came through with perfect clarity, and suddenly...
“Well... If – You – Want — I can tell you — I can tell you the secret of me. I can tell you — I can tell you but first you have to see. So let me show you this dove – Poof, now it’s a shark – Look at the heat freeze the air above – as you create a snowflake from a spark. The sun’s in the sky, can you see? – How can you? Silly, we’re in the dark. you can make it all happen, once chaos reigns supreme! – so let it – into – your heart! I can show you — I can show you what it's like, I can show you — I can show you the day at midnight! So let me tell you, with delight – That you just need to listen to yourself – and you'll always be right. Don't think too much about it – just go with your gut. Harmony is about order – Anarchy about rage – but as Chaos everything is so... "So what?" Once you learn not to care about the details – 'stead strive for some change. You will laugh instead of cry or growl – others will claim you're deranged. Don't mind them – you'll be saving lives dawning the Chaos cowl – just let the world become – your – stage — let me tell you – let me show you what chaos can do! let me show you – let me tell you the truth! Yes — let me tell you the truth...”
Maverick slid down to Bun from his song and dance number once more and gently spoke to her. “Because once you act like chaos... Chaos... Will act... Like... You.”
He smiled. “Chaos is the magic of change, Bun. If you wish to change the world for the better, you are the only pony that can do it... You just need to start acting like it instead of trying to live a "normal" life. Cause that's out the window in terms of possibility.”
“R-Right... I... I think I understand.” Bun introspected heavily.
“Wonderful! Cause I don't think readers will put up with another song and dance number.”
“I've... Always been afraid of crimes... Criminals... Hurting ponies... But... What good am I doing just sitting around working on irrelevant emotions software for a robot...” Bun found herself lifting up into a mighty stand, “I... I'll do it. Screw it! I'll use this body and all my chaos magic to become a crime fighting robot spy and actually make some change!”
“That's the spirit.” Maverick relaxed once more and watched, sitting back with hooves up.
“Will you train me, Maverick? I promise I won't pull my punches, or I will, I don't know and frankly don't care, I just want to fix my city.” Bun put her hoof to her heart, swearing her new objective to her soul.
“Awesome! Fuck yeah, I'll train you, let's go get started right now while the nerds have their meeting.” Maverick shot right up.
“Yeah!” They galloped to the training hall, together.
Hoof in hoof, the two concentrated on Bun's inner power. After another bout of far more enthusiastic combat training, Bun now got her first chance to see how in the absolute tartarus magic works.
“Grr...” Bun growled like a mangey dog.
“Come on, Bun, it's not a turd! You can't just push hard and it'll come out, you need intent behind it! Vision and... Like, I dunno how to say this stuff, just let it happen naturally!” Maverick rubbed her back to settle her down.
“F-Fine! Just let me concentrate!” She took a moment to release her stress and looked into herself, thinking over her intentions, wanting to change herself, make herself stronger, her magic flowing from inside and focusing up into her mind.
Then with a sparky flash and a hiss, something had changed.
“W-Woah! Did I do it?! What did I do!?” Bun excitedly looked around her body to find changes, none obvious.
“Hahahhaha!” Maverick slapped his knee, “You really are gonna have to spend a long, long time learning to control your magic.”
“W-What? What did I do?!” Bun stared down at Mav, and so did the snakes draping down the side of her head who shared her curiosity.
Bun then saw the snakes. “AHHHH! MY HAIR IS SNAKES, MY HAIR IS SNAKES!!!” She shook her head as hard as she could, the snakes hissing and struggling against her until she shook off the enchantment itself and her hair faded back into soft blond streaks.
“Oh, Bun, you’re gonna be a fun apprentice.” Maverick took a wander around the room as Bun hyperventilated her panic away.
From the door, a knocking came, a polite and perky knock, surprising Maverick how well he could tell who it was by just the banging on the door. “It's open, Hue!”
“I-I know! But I heard grunting and screaming noises, and I just don't want to walk in on you two like I did my parents that one time!” Hue squeaked from her side of the door, then she fell right through as Ace shoved open the door and walked in. “Ah!!” She screamed on her way down to the floor.
“Heh... Get up, Hue.” Ace helped the poor filly up and made room for the royal guard Pious, the big red dragon and Felix the shimmer to enter after them.
“My goodness...” Maverick shook his head. “Sometimes I question the fact that you are all secret agents.”
“Hey! My mommy owns you!” Hue pointed hard at Maverick, and then looked over to Bun. “Hello, new mare! Can we be friends?!” Hue waved so fast her leg nearly tore off from its joint.
Bun panted and wobbled up, regaining a bit of composure. “Okay... Time to do this right.” Bun took a hop to Hue and hugged her. “Of course, Hue! I'd love to be yours, and Felix's friend. My name is Bun Button, I'm a chaos robot or whatever. Oh, and you don't need to show me your mind erasing ability, I already know it's epic.”
Hue's eyes became two burning firework festivals. “Awesome, awesome, awesome!”
Bun then quickly grabbed Felix into a hug as well, Felix's head jolted up in the back, completely bewildered... But deep down, surprisingly delighted and relieved.
Hue pondered a thought, “W-Wait... How did you know I erase minds..? I don't remember telling you! Did you wipe my mind?! Or did you get me to wipe my own mind?!? Holy moly, I must trust you a lot to wipe my own mind for you!”
Bun giggled and let go of Felix. “Hehe... You’re adorable, Hue. Now...” She turned to Ace, who was cockily smirking, waiting to pull her fast confident act on the newbie.
“Hey there, partner, name's A-”
“Ace Derby, master thief, and if you’re eyeing my million bits worth robot heart it better be ‘cause you think I'm cute and not ‘cause you think I'm just gonna let you have it for nothing. Heh.” Bun hugged the fire-red Pegasus, happily having toppled the mare's ego and causing her to blush hard, even past her natural red fur, all behind the cover of her cowgirl hat which she pulled over her face.
“U-Uh... T-Tha's... Right... Good to meet ya, Bun... Welcome ta the team.” Ace softly patted Bun on the back for a moment, and let go.
Bun right up to Pious, who mentally prepared himself for Bun now that he can see she's a tricky one.
“You owe me a round two. And this time don't skimp on me, Pious. Yeah?” Bun smiled, and so did he.
“I may not understand you completely... As I don't remember a first battle... But if it's a bout you desire, then of course, my fair lady. I'll look forward to it.” Pious bowed to her.
“Good... And finally.” Bun turned her head up, and up, and up to look at the ceiling where the dragon's head lurched above her. “Put it there, bud.” Bun lifted up her hoof, and after an odd glare from him, the dragon gave her a light hoof/fist bump. Pleasantly refreshed by a pony not being afraid of him for once.
Maverick wiped away a tear. “I'm so proud. She's becoming... Cool.”
“I can hear you, you know.” Bun slid into line with the others. “Now, do you have that mission briefing for us?”
Ace shook her head, “I'm mighty sorry, but I thought we were doin' a training day for the newbie. What's up with that?”
Maverick woke up a little. “Uhh... Right, yeah no, we're skipping all that. We have proper business to attend to!”
Hue woo'd and everyone else perked up slightly.
Maverick pulled up a large bulletin board out from off-screen with pictures scattered around of some blurred, cloaked figure and a bunch of corpses on a map. “So, we got a problematic Zebra necromancer. I'm talking zombie army, demonic world ending plot, maniacal laughing after monologues, the whole shtick. Now the research center already has intel on his whereabouts and all that jazz, but since you're in training you're gonna have to get it yourselves. Though fair warning, if you’re too good at locating him, you'll end up working in research full time and I wouldn't wish that upon anyone.”
Maverick pulled a folder out of a cabinet and spilled its contents on the ground, a pile of newspapers forming. “These are your leads. They're what we start with normally, the public freaking out about some 'strange occurrences'. We look into them and sometimes, we find something we need to fix. So... Go find us a necromancer.”
The six trainees took some odd glances around at each other, only broken by Ace stepping forward to slip a newspaper under her single wing. “Haven't been on a hunt in quite the moment... This'll be some good fun.”
Pious swiftly lifted another news sheet with his blade and slid it down to his hooves. “And will we be working together or individually for this task, sir?” He gave a glance to their mentor.
“Eh... I generally recommend not being a prick, ‘cause that's my job, but if you got the balls to try work alone it's your choice. Whatever gets results.” Maverick spat out halfheartedly, now relaxing in a lounge chair.
“Noted, sir.” Pious nodded.
“W-Well... I've never had to track a pony down before...” Felix mumbled while unenthusiastically lifting up his own newspaper.
“Oh we got this, Felix! Don't you fret!” Hue hopped to his side and peered into his paper, reading through the headlines.
The lumbering dragon leaned over and picked one paper out, taking a gaze at the pictures before shrugging and dropping the sheets back down.
Bun finally lifted up her own papers with the intention of reading, though her attention was first drawn by Maverick.
“Good luck, all of you, you're free to work as you please. If you need me, just speak to yourself like a crazy pony and one of our chips will pick it up, be it the one in your skull, phone or any other one we put somewhere inside you for the funsies. Apart from that, I expect to meet you all here tomorrow at the regular time with this zebra bastard's home address. Peace.” And with that Maverick strolled on out.
Ace nudged the dragon on his hip, “Hey, big boy, wanna help me threaten some criminal scum contacts of mine?”
He didn't need to be asked twice, immediately picking up Ace by the stomach with a great smile plastered behind sharp teeth and stomping on out of the facility.
Pious took a small bow, “If any of you need assistance I will gladly help, but ‘til then, I believe I'll be setting off on my own. Farewell.” And the stallion took off as well.
Mere moments later, Hue jumped in excitement as she passed over the newspaper, “There, there, Felix! That one! That has to be the necromancer! Let’s go, let’s go!” Before Felix could stop her, he was already being dragged out of the room.
As he was pulled on out he managed a glance at Bun, “U-Uh... G-Good luck I guess!” He shouted to her, following up with a slight mumble that if it weren't for Bun's enhanced hearing, she may have not heard. “F-Friend...”
And Bun was alone again, after that social whirlwind she was kind of glad to be, but she also sorta wished she could get to know her new colleagues in a calmer, slower environment. She had grown used to working in a tame desk job after all.
Eh... No time to waste.
Bun lifted up her paper and began reading as she toiled her way out of the building, passing over stuff until she finally found something interesting.
Homeless Shelters Report Increase in Missing Ponies in Big Cities
Homeless shelters around Manehattan, Fillydelphia and other large cities have reported that homeless ponies who regularly reserved beds have been going missing at a higher rate these past few months, with over 54 homeless ponies designated officially missing in the past three months. Homeless shelters and caretakers are concerned; the homeless being a particularly vulnerable group. This recent anomaly is being correlated to crime, potentially due to recent police-lead investigations into the drug cartels and street gangs creating an upset in the criminal underworld of the city.
We sat down with a social aid worker and activist, Penny Frisk of the Roof's project on Canal Street, Manehattan, in an interview about these occurrences. They told us the following: “It's no strange occurrence for a homeless or disadvantaged pony to wander in and out of our services week to week; sometimes they find someplace else or they get caught out in a bad spot and can't make it that night, or the unfortunate happens. Although the number of ponies that we've lost contact with has nearly doubled this month, and that's really worrying. We personally finally took notice when one of our ponies, Chalk Tally, who hasn't missed a night in our beds in twelve years of struggling with homelessness and alcoholism, suddenly disappeared, very very uncharacteristically. While what's happening can simply be a statistical anomaly, it definitely highlights the issues in our city and how we need more effort and money to be put into solving them.”
- Watch the full interview on TheHoofprint.com
If you are feeling generous, please donate to the Roof's project at ARoof4All.com or to any other local homeless charity to help with the ongoing crisis.
Strange phenomena, huh..? Perhaps...
Within seconds she was connected to her phone's internet.
[Chalk Tally Pony, Canal Street, Alcohol.]
34,000 search results.
Local legend Chalk Tally breaks another drinking record at The River Dock - @TheRiverDockBar Chirper.com/TheRiverDockBar/status/849813577770778624
Top 10 must see places on Canal Street! Whatsbuzzing.com/articles/Top10CanalStreet
Haywire announces new wire-brand writing chalk, now alcohol free! Haywire.com/CHALK missing - Canal Street.
...
I think that's what I'd call a lead... And near home too.
She just managed to step into one of the facility’s many elevators, and she switched off her internet-vision to click a floor button, and she found herself hesitating. The options weren't exactly... Self explanatory, you see.
“Ponyville... Canterlot... W-What..?” She mumbled to herself. “Is...” She scanned down the list of buttons, each reading a city name, and sure enough. “Manehattan... These can't possibly... Can they..?”
She sheepishly plopped the button back into its socket and it lit up gently, and as would be expected, the elevator doors shut and she began moving upward.
A few minutes passed by like any other elevator ride, having eased Bun a little. Then a ding rang through the air as the elevator came to a halt.
The doors slid open, Bun fully expecting to still be inside Twilight's castle in ponyville, found herself walking out into a dusty old office in a completely different building. With awe, Bun strolled on out into the hallways, and immediately she recognised where she had ended up.
“Manehattan City Hall...” She mumbled under her breath, Bun could see the place burst with life, ponies sprawling back and forth with city business. Meetings were being held, papers were being transferred and ponies shuffled around the halls. Bun trotted down until she found herself exiting by the receptionist desk, right out the double doors and into the shining streets of Manehattan, when just moments ago she was in Ponyville.
“Well then... Magic elevators... Good to know...” Bun took a small sigh and shook her head, knowing it's better not to question this kinda thing, which really dug at her science-based views.
She went back online and quickly found the bar she wanted on a map and started walking. No time to waste... I suppose.
“That there is the place.” The friendly pedestrian pony pointed Bun to the bar she was after.
“Oh, thank you so much, sir!” Bun dashed over to the brick-built drinking site sitting adjacent to the wide Manehattan river. It was a homely little bar with well worn and well loved furnishings, windows and door all elegantly made of fine wood, polished and cleaned over decades. A small, wonderfully engraved sign read 'The River Dock Bar' atop the doorway.
“Finally!” Bun exclaimed to herself, pushing right in through the door.
The inside of the bar smelt thickly of fine whisky and flame-swept logs. The interior was decked with fine dark-wooded countertops and finely engraved walls holding up a wooden ceiling. Felts and silks for the cushions and pool table, mountains of liquor bottles for behind the long counter top.
A heavy contrast to the neat and old fashioned physique of the bar itself, one of the two only ponies other than Bun currently inside was the young out-of-college bartender who's bright green mane-style looked like it got thrown out of the electro-punk rave for being too blatant, yet not invocative enough. Her body was filled with rings and jewelry to an extent that standing too near a magnet might take her skin off. Though she was lost in a world of thought between two earphones, her hooves tediously cleaning glasses.
Bun trotted up to the bar, “H-Hello..? Miss?”
The pony, without sparing a glance, tapped the sign on the countertop.
Opening Hours - Mon - Fri 2PM to 12AM Sat - Sun 12PM to 12AM
“Right...” Bun sighed at the fact it was only six minutes to two PM and waiting six minutes was going to be painful.
“Hey there, lil' filly...” But apparently she wouldn't need to wait to speak with someone as a voice from the only other pony in the bar traveled over to Bun's ears. The voice was grimy and torn, and with a soft turn of her head, Bun could see the hunched over stallion, mane as white as death itself, with the most welcoming smile. “What brings ya to the ol' River?”
“O-Oh... Um...” Bun took a step over to him. “Just... Looking for somepony.”
“Heh heh... If it's a regular at this place... Then I'll be able to tell ya ever'thing about em.” He laughed to himself and took a sip from his short glass.
“R-Really? Oh, that would be wonderful.” Bun perked up and slid on over.
“Yup... The name's Scotch... By the way. Nice ta meet ya.” He graveled out with mindful care, lifting up his hoof for Bun to shake, which she did gladly.
“I'm Bun, nice to meet you too, sir... So, would you happen to know a certain Chalk Tally?” She sat down in his booth on the opposite end.
“Chalk! What a character that pony...” Scotch smiled and went into thinking. “Last I saw him he... He was worried about one thin' or another... That was quite the while ago.”
Bun wrote notes down inside her roboty-brain. “What was he worried about? If you know.”
“Ah... Well...” Scotch leaned a few inches closer and hushed his voice, “Ya see... He was involved in some... Unsavoury activities... If ya know what I mean...”
“Yes... I understand, sir. Would you happen to know anything about... The places he would do those activities? I'm... On an investigation of sorts.” Bun tried to speak as politely as she could.
“Well... I wouldn't know any specifics or nothin'... But I do know there's some warehouse he used to frequent... Somewhere down near Bodied Street... I dunno where exactly though, sorry, miss.” He shook his head and took another sip.
“Oh no, don't be sorry, that is amazing already, thank you so much!” Bun let him see a bright smile from her.
“You're welcome, lil' filly. Heh...”
Suddenly a squeaky voice Bun could instantly recognise rung from outside the bar, “Here, here, here this is the place!”
Hue burst right through the door, some timid stallion which Bun only could assume is Felix in disguise followed behind.
“Oh my Celestia! Hey, Bun! Awesome to see you here!” She waved over and trotted to the counter, slapping down some kinda official-looking ID or something. “I'M AN INSPECTOR! Where is the owner of this establishment!?” She gave the distressed bartender the stink-eye.
The barkeep pointed over to a door in the back with an uneasy hoof.
“Good.” She glared at the mare, walking to the door, giving Bun a quick turn wink and smile as she hopped on into the back.
“S-Sorry about her... She takes our job very seriously.” Felix's voice confirmed his identity to Bun, the bartender on the other hoof just shook her head and went back to cleaning.
Bun thanked Scotch once more and hopped over to Felix's side. “Hey there.”
“Oh... Hi... Uh, here let's take a seat while Hue works. She just needs a few minutes.” Felix pulled Bun to a side booth and sat down with her.
“So... How you holding up?” Bun gave him a heartwarming smile.
“Well... I... I think... Maybe I dunno...” He shook his head. “Just kinda nervous I guess... First mission and all... Even with all the training, I feel unprepared.”
“Don't worry... I technically haven't gotten any training. So, you’re at minimum more prepared than me... How was the training?”
Felix let out a nervous laugh, “Haha... Ah... Yeah... It was... Bad... I dunno how you got in, but I had to do this like six month long thing where we got tested over and over and a lotta ponies died; it was that intense... But... You know... That's what we signed up for.”
“Really? That sounds crazy...”
His smile turned into a nasty look of recalling memories, “Yeah... It was... I'm just glad I made it through the damn thing...”
“So... Did you get selected or did you sign up for it or something?”
“I... Signed up to it...” He looked unsure if he regretted that decision.
“Why..? Like... I'm doing this ‘cause I wanna use the power I have for some good... I hope it's good at least.”
Felix sighed in dissonance, “I guess... It's ‘cause I wanted some place to fit in...” He looked her in the eyes, “You see it's weird being a shimmer... There's only like, half a dozen of my species... Like in total... And we can't die of old age, so all the other shimmers are hundreds, some thousands of years old and stuff... And I'm... Only thirty years old. They see me as like a newborn baby basically... So, I didn't fit in with them... And I didn’t want to live a lie and pretend to be a pony... So, when I found the Shadow Service... It sounded perfect, and now I have Hue, and... You, so... That's nice... I think I'll need a while before I warm up to the others, but yeah... It's looking up.”
“Huh... Well, I'm sure the others will warm up to you too.”
“Yeah, I hope so... And thanks for just accepting the whole shimmers are changelings but good thing, cause I really don't like having to explain where my people come from... Its a long dumb story about a changeling Queen called Seta who lived four thousand years ago and harmony magic and blah blah... Hehe.” It was nice to see him smile, at least Bun thought so.
“Hehehe, you're welcome, Felix.” Bun cheered up too.
“AND TAKE THAT AS A LESSON FOR NEXT TIME, PUNK!” Hue screamed as she kicked her way out of the back room, slamming the door behind her with a swing. She then skipped over to the other two. “Hiya! I got the camera footage we needed! The owner was very nice.” She smiled.
“Uhh... Hehe... If you say so, Hue. What did you get? Footage?” Bun asked.
“Security footage! Apparently this Chalk pony that mysteriously went missing visited this bar every single day without fail. So, I can find the day he went missing with the footage! It was Felix's idea.”
“Y-Yeah... Hehe.” Felix rubbed the back of his head.
“Woah, cool idea... Here, want me to scan the footage for you?”
“You can do that?!” Hue's eyes jumped.
“Uh... I... Yeah... Sure I can. I don't see why not.”
Hue slid over a hard drive, Bun picked it up and prodded it curiously, scanning her body to try and find... clink.
A tiny socket opened up in her left temple. “Okay... Let's see...” She put the plug in and the data appeared inside her inner computer and she searched on through the hours and hours of footage. Skipping on through the days. “What does he look like?”
“Gray stallion, shaved head. Wears a big thick jacket.” Felix replied.
“Yeah... he's here...” She kept scrolling on through. “And... Aha! Got it. Missing on the tenth... So he must have been taken on the ninth or early morning on the tenth.”
“Awesome! Now we just need to find where he was on that day and track where he was taken! Woo!” Hue wagged her hips.
Bun smiled over to Scotch. “Well... I think I know the place he would have been.”
“Where?!”
“Shush, Hue!” Bun snapped at Hue as quietly as she could, pulling her down out of the window they were watching from.
It was now later in the evening, the sun barely still hanging in the sky. The three of them were posted in an abandoned scrapyard along this decades old industrial district overlooking a gloomy decrepit street. Down this street a pony walked in dark, heavy attire. Their face was hidden beneath a hood, cutie mark covered with a long dark jacket. They dragged behind them another pony; a nervous looking, grimy, unshaven stallion who stepped along after the first pony. The stallion following behind most definitely seemed worried for his life.
“Yeah... That looks like the same pony.” Bun commented in whispers, after leaving the bar earlier they found the street-cam footage of the day Chalk Tally went missing, finding that he was led in this street’s direction before disappearing to this day, just like this pony was being led this very moment.
“Let's see where he goes.” Felix added and watched along with the other two.
Poking their heads between sheets of metal scrap they witnessed the ponies trot up to a specific warehouse entrance at a side-door. The leading pony punched in a security code on a keypad which was surprisingly functional, despite its horridly decrepit state. Then they shoved the frightened stallion inside.
“Ahh! There! Come on, let's go! Felix, get ready!” Hue hopped up and pulled her friends over the street. She then tiptoed over to the side of the warehouse where Bun and herself hid next to some rank industrial sized bins that had sat there rotting for years.
Felix on the other hoof went right up to the secured door in question, his skin glowing softly as it morphed. He shrank down more than half his height and his legs all molded softly to have light blue fur and hair sprouted from his head to create a long girlish mane, when the shine stopped, Felix would be indistinguishable from a regular young filly.
He took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
Inside the building somepony swore heavily in confusion as they stomped to the door, which made Felix even more excited to speak with this super duper one-hundred percent clearly totally angelic and kind individual.
“What the fuck is going... On..?” The hooded pony slammed open the door, their hood now down and face clear to Felix. They were a rough looking green mare with a dirty and messed up yellow mane. And it seemed that the young little filly standing at her hooves was quite the bewildering sight to her.
Felix turning it up to eleven. “M-M-M-Miss... I-I-I... I-I'm lost... A-A-And... I d-don't know how to g-get home...”
“Listen, kid, get the fuck outta here! All right? I don't wanna see you here!” The mare yelled at the tiny child.
Felix apparently was a pretty damn good actor, beginning to cry his heart out. “P-P-Please!! I'm scared! I want my mommy!!!”
“Listen, kid, shut the fuck...” The mare turned around as someone from inside the building yelled over.
“What's going on over there!?”
“Let me deal with it! It's fine!” The mare walked out and shut the door as Felix cried, trying not to draw any more attention. “Now listen! I will kick you into the fucking dirt if y-” The mare suddenly had her sentence cut off by Bun pouncing, not unlike a cheetah, towards her with a robot hoof pulled back all the way. Bun threw her punch at the mare and dented her skull with enough force to knock her out stone cold, if not worse.
“Ah... Ahh...” Bun panted softly, “I did it...” She let her eyes wander down to the pony’s body, it quickly growing still and lifeless as it bled out from the mouth, which made Bun realise something kinda important. “Oh... D-Did... I just... K-Kill somepony..?”
“Yeah, you did!” Hue applauded her, quickly taking the body and dragging it to the dumpster where she threw it into. “Don't worry, as a shadow agent, little crimes like that get waived. Hehe.”
“Um... O-Okay... I just... N-Never killed anyone before... I never thought I... Would...” Bun started to shake a little.
Hue hugged her tight, “Aw, don't worry, take a breather if you need it, but don't feel sorry for the pony you just took out. They're a kidnapper and most likely a murderer themselves; Equestria's better off without them.”
“Y-Yeah... You're right... You're right.” Bun took a breath.
Next time the two of them looked at Felix, he had already turned into the identical image of the pony they just disposed of. “Okay... I'm ready.” Voice was spot on too.
“C-Cool... We'll be ready... G-Go on in.” Bun stuttered out, still calming the heck down.
Felix nodded and pressed against the door... And found it had locked again. “Uh... Oh...” Felix eyed the keypad. “We might have to find another way in. That is... Unless either of you two caught the code.”
Hue shrugged.
Bun crossed her eyes, Focus Bun... Her gaze wandered up to the keypad. “Maybe... I can try... Hack it..?”
“You can do that?” Hue was impressed.
“I don't know what I can do... But I might as well try...” She overlooked the keypad, it was a simple zero to nine numberpad. She looked at the sides and bottom, trying to find anything she could pick her way into, but there wasn't anything. All right, Bun... Think...
“Lash! You finished out there or what?!?” A pony yelled from inside.
“A-Ahh Yeah! Give me a second!” Felix, now knowing his persona's name, replied.
“You better get back here right fucking now!”
Oh no... Ahhh... Come on, Bun... Just... Screw it! Bun felt a little surge in chaos magic pull her hoof forward, where she just pressed random buttons, hoping beyond hope that somehow that-
Unlocked.
Oh... That... Worked... She smiled a little on the inside, she just felt her magic flow, even just a spark.
“Nice, Bun! Let’s skedaddle!” Hue whispered while pulling her back, Felix stepping on through the door in his full disguise.
Bun watched their friend step past the door and leave it ever so slightly ajar, their voice growing distant as they walked into the facility.
Hue and Bun found themselves together behind the dumpsters once more.
“The plan is going so well! Eee! Hehe!” Hue celebrated, faintly trying to use whispers.
“Yeah... It is... Though I guess I didn't expect things to be this intense already...” Bun's face didn't know whether to smile out of joy for things working out or start crying from a mental breakdown right now.
“Ah, don't worry, it's only really intense the first few times; it'll start getting fun too!” Hue giggled.
“R-Really? Hue... I don't know how you stay so positive... Especially around... This... Hehe.” Bun pointed around at the trash heap they were in.
“I dunno! Or maybe I do I dunno... Hehe woops, said I dunno twice, that's a confusing sentence. Anyways... I'm just kinda used to seeing the bright side in everything... I didn't have a lotta stuff growing up, no friends either. I had a lotta makeshift stuffed animals and stuff that kept me company. My mommy had to do lots of crime and stuff before she got hired into the Shadow Service. My daddy was killed before I was born and I didn't go to school and stuff... So, I guess stuff just stopped bothering me, I grew resilient and learned to see the bright side in everything, even the worst situations. And now I do have friends and stuff, and that makes me extra happy...” Hue's eyes wandered off during her monologue, and she shook her head strongly after. “Did I get really real just there? Woops. Hehe.” She smiled.
“Yeah... You kinda did. But I don't mind. Hehe... And I sympathise a lot. I had a single mother too.” Bun broke into a soft smile.
“Hehehe... Thanks. And I'm really enjoying getting to be a spy and stuff. Helping make Equestria a better place? That's my calling.” Hue smiled with her.
“I get it... Hey... You think it's been long enough?”
“Yeah. Let’s get on in there!” Hue hopped up and Bun swiftly followed.
Hue put up her hoof and took the lead, gently peeking and keeping a keen ear and eye open as she masterfully slid on through the door and quickly found cover behind some abandoned machinery. She waved Bun over the all clear as she saw nopony in the large desolate manufacturing area.
Bun shifted over, nowhere as fast Hue, as she focused on not making a sound in reaching the cover.
“They must be deeper inside. Follow closely.” Hue whispered into Bun's ear and took to the walls, lurching down the large room towards the back where a garage door was locked into a half-up position, a small amount of artificial light shone out from the other side.
Hue peaked under it and smiled, whispering over to Bun. “Blood warning, hehe.” She then slid on under.
Bun quickly strode under the garage door, careful to spot whatever Hue was on about, the corpse of another criminal-looking stallion bleeding from his now split neck seemed about right. And it made Bun gag a little.
The body laid on the floor over Felix still in disguise, though his hoof was currently transformed into a recently used blade, shape-shifting back into a hoof as he watched Bun and Hue approach.
“Hey... I dealt with this one... And there's four more further inside and then the big boss is apparently holding the pony we saw in a truck behind attached to the loading bay.” Felix trotted up to the very back of this room, which was brimming with rotted crates and barrels of metalwork, to a door presumably leading to the loading bay. “Right through here, they're playing cards, and watching tv, and stuff.”
“Ok... Mnn... How do we plan on dealing with four of them?” Bun questioned gently.
“I was hoping we could get past them and into the massive truck, I nicked the keys to the truck the boss is in.” Felix flashed the set of keys.
Hue beamed with readiness. “Awesome! Sounds like a plan... Bun, you got any ideas for a distraction?”
“Why would you think I can make a distraction..?” Bun raised an eyebrow.
“Well... Chaos magic..? Right?” Hue giggled.
“Oh...” Bun let out a soft sigh, “Right... That's my job isn't it? Hmm... You said they were watching television?”
“Yeah, they are, well, at the very least there is a tv on in there.” Felix clarified.
“Okay, well... Time to pull something out of my ass.” She slipped a panel open in her hoof and pulled out a wire she was sure didn't do anything too important and walked up to a plug and just jammed it right in. A little chaotic jolt inside her heart was a wonderful assertion from her magic.
Suddenly the lights began to flicker in these few back rooms, and Bun panicked slightly. “Come on, sparky... We'll do something fun... Let's work together...” She pleaded with the magic churning within her.
The lights regulated slightly and Bun could feel the currents running in the walls; she was suddenly holding a lot of energy and it begged for a place to put it so it could wreak havoc.
“A-Ahh... T-There... Go...” She found the television connected in with the circuit and channeled the chaos in there, letting it go to do its thing.
As she pulled out of the socket her hoof got zapped, “Ah! Eh... I... I think that might be working.” She waved her hoof to get the static feeling out and pulled her ear near the wall, hearing faint distorted speech and ponies being very confused and hitting presumably the television.
“Hehe, whatever you did in there, they sound very preoccupied! Good job!” Hue slowly opened the door, and peeked over to see a group of four violent ponies yelling at each other and smacking the television. Even after unplugging it, the thing didn't stop the image from blaring weird-ass ads for products that don't make much sense at all really.
The loading bay room stood stacked with more containers, but also with makeshift beds, a rancid fridge and a few tables along with some lock boxes and a safe that most likely contained very illegal things and very dirty money.
But more importantly there were three plots where a truck could comfortably sit inside while being loaded. One of the lots had a worn, unbranded gray truck with a large tarp being used as a curtain door, hanging off off its backside. Inside two figures could be heard, one speaking with some sentences and statements half off as whispers from the other, whimpering pony inside the back of the truck.
Hue leaned down to Felix and told him something, and he nodded, slyly and swiftly stepping into the room and down by the side of the truck, reaching its cabin. He climbed the tiny stepladder and very gingerly hoisting his way inside.
Hue looked to Bun. “Ready?”
Bun nodded.
“Follow close.” She whispered and stepped out into the room, the noise of her hooves masked completely by the loud chatter of the disoriented gang, Bun's followed hoofprint in hoofprint with Hue's as they got to the back of the truck.
Hue took a quick peek under the tarp curtain.
“- yeah I got it, here.” At the back of the truck, behind a few long pony-sized boxes, there were several guns loosely thrown about and a full stack of the drug known as glitter. A bright pink-furred earth pony mare with a solid white mane that wore a bespoke vest and a well ironed, white shirt stood talking into a cell phone in front of a cowering stallion. Her eyes gleamed with fire and an intense lack of empathy, along with her sleazy, yet well articulated voice; it was easy to tell why she was the 'boss'.
The boss took her phone and aimed it at the stallion, taking a photo with flash. She then turned around and spoke into it once more. “You got that? Yeah... And it look good or what?”
Hue and Bun took this chance to slip into the truck and lay down behind the crates, watching and waiting for a chance to strike.
“Wonderful! They'll be with you tonight, see you there.” She ended the call and slipped the phone in her pocket.
The stallion went to plead, “P-P-Please, Jesper... I-I'll do whatever y-y-”
Without letting the poor pony finish his sentence, she pulled a silenced pistol out from beneath her vest and put a bullet into the pony’s skull, the body dropping like a stone in water, slumping down and pooling blood. “You'll do whatever I want all right.” Jesper chuckled. She then turned her head out to the exit. “Max, Trix, get in here and help me move this thing.”
Bun gasped to herself and shook softly. O-Oh... Celestia... I... I could have saved them... She stared at the victim.
Jesper waited for a response, hearing the commotion going on outside that was distracting the ponies out there from her composed voice. “Ughh... What are you idiots doing...” She began stomping to the curtain, right into the range where Hue could leap out and restrain Jesper's mouth, throat and forelegs.
Which she did. Obviously.
Hue choked Jesper’s throat and muffled her squeal, kicking her in the ribs just to wind her double time. Her blade was magically lifted up to Jesper's head and pointed directly against her throat as Hue squeezed the breath out of the pony. “Hush now... Not a word, and you get to live...”
Bun snapped herself out of it and ran to the back of the truck, bumping the steel wall between them and the driver’s seat to give Felix the go ahead.
Felix in the front kickstarted the engine, which finally got the attention of the gang outside. They screamed at the truck, asking what in Equestria was happening, only to obtain no responses. Felix hit the pedal and the truck deeply revved forward, crashing through the flimsy rusted up garage door holding it back from the outside world.
The ponies screaming outside became a distant noise as the truck pulled up onto the road and hauled Hue, Bun and Jesper away.
Hue threw Jesper onto the floor after stripping her of weapons. “There we go. Now we can chat.”
“What the fuck do you ponies want?!” Jesper screeched out.
“Glad we can can get right down to business.” Hue smiled. “Who's the necromancer you’re selling these bodies to?” Hue pressured her leg down onto Jesper’s chest to keep her pinned to the floor.
“That's what this is about?! Well tough luck, filly, you can threaten to kill me all you want, I ain't gonna tell you shit about that. I'd be a dead mare walking if I did.” Jesper grunted out at Hue.
“Is that so, huh? Well, how about you tell me your name, Jesper.”
Jesper crossed her eyes, “What are you up to?”
Hue kicked her ribs in and left her wheezing for a moment. “Say your name, Jesper.”
“Jesper! My name is Jesper, you psychopath!” she coughed out.
“Good.” Hue smiled and her horn shone in its soft blues, and her hooves traveled down and hugged the sides of Jesper’s skull. Jesper winced slightly as a magical pressure hit her mind. After a few moments Hue retracted her hooves. “Now say your name again.”
Jesper began furious, “What did you just do?! And I just said my name! I...” And ended up horrified. “I just... said... It... W-What... W-Why can't I remember my name?! What's happening?!?”
“You see, I wipe minds. Remove memories and ideas directly from your head... Shame I haven't learned how to read minds yet cause that would make this far easier, but...” Hue leaned in real close. “If you don't tell me everything about this necromancer deal, I'll wipe every single thing out of your mind until you’re nothing but an empty husk. And then you'll wish you were dead. Got it?”
“Y-Yes! Okay, please, fine! Just don't do that anymore, I'll tell you everything!” Jesper panicked and squirmed under Hue's leg.
“Awesome! Go ahead and spill it. Hehe.” Hue smirked.
“T-The necromancer lives somewhere in Appleloosa... They have a group of ponies - middlemares of sorts - that I deal with. I think the necromancer is paying them to source these bodies... The gang is called the Vipers or something like that... I was gonna bring these three corpses outta town near the savannah to hoof off to them. That's all I know!”
“Wonderful! Bun, you got all that down?” Hue looked to her friend, who was fascinated and terrified simultaneously, but nodded still.
“Neato! Now, Jesper, it's been nice knowing you, but you can't have seen me, so...” Hue reached down and her magic sparkled once more, Jesper screaming and writhing trying to get out of Hue's grip.
After a light memory wiping, Hue smacked the back of the truck and Felix parked along the sidewalk. “Bun, help me lift her up, we gotta make this look like she was driving.”
“O-Okay...” Bun stepped up to Jesper, she was completely out of it, dizzy and her mind fuzzy as it tried to resettle. Bun lifted her up with Hue and pulled her down out of the truck. With a little hassle they threw her up into the driver's seat in Felix's place.
As Felix changed back into himself, Hue took a brick lying around the abandoned street and placed it on the gas pedal and swiftly hopped off the truck.
The three of them then watched as the truck drove down the sidewalk for a few dozen meters before crashing into a light pole.
And with that, they all slipped away before anyone would arrive to investigate.
“T-Thanks, Hue... So... Where are we going?” Felix turned his gaze between the other two.
Bun took a deep breath, taking in the stress of the situation that just passed, breathing out and letting it all go. She was ready to take on the next step.
“DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF YOU! Look up, Hue!” Felix shook his friend.
“Oh! That's Appleloosa?! Where’s the dirt roads and saloons?! I've seen southern movies! There should be cowfillies and bandits everywhere!”
In front of the trio stood the mighty city of Appleloosa. Sure, it wasn't the wooden, old fashioned, heart of the wild wild south it had once been, but it also had not lost its soul. The paved concrete streets and modern infrastructure bore resemblances of the southern style in their details, stars and apples littered the seams and signs of buildings. Even some of the ponies still wandered around in cowfilly hats and farm-themed clothing, despite the modern era they lived in.
“There's still saloons, Hue... They just look more modern now. Those films are set hundreds of years ago you know.” Bun interjected with an enduring and knowing grin.
“Yeah, but!” Hue slumped down a little, “But I've always wanted to be in one of those movies! I love them!”
“Well, how about a book?” Bun giggled.
“As in, be in a book? Why would I want that? There's no old south books! Earth Ponies couldn't read back then!” Hue protested.
“Oh, no reason.” I'd say Bun giggled again but I believe that's quite obvious.
Anyways, the three of them finally moved their asses and trotted on into Appaloosa.
It was the dead of night, the stars of the sky speckled down light upon the city's dusty neon signs that overwhelmed the main street with strong orange and red pigments, thick scents of whisky swooned in their direction from the many bars and their hooves crunched down on the dusty and sandy pavement coated by the winds from the desert.
“So we're looking for some gang called the Vipers, huh?” Felix assured himself.
“Yup, I don't know how one would go about doing such a thing though.” Bun gave him his answer.
Hue hopped over to a window of a bar and peeked inside, “If southern movies taught me right, the smartest pony in any town is a bartender!”
“That... Doesn't sound like a bad idea. Which one do should we try first?” Bun scanned her eyes down the rows of drinking holes.
“Hmmm... Maybe we should split up! Do three at a time!” Hue hopped.
Felix turned to Hue with skewed eyebrows, “Are you sure that's a good idea, Hue? I know we can handle ourselves but what if Bun... Well... Gets into trouble by herself?”
He shouldn't have said that. “WHAT?! You don't think I can handle myself?!” Bun yelled far too loud for public decency.
“W-Well, more than a regular pony sure, but you've never been trained in combat and...”
“I can literally crack ponies’ skulls in with one punch! I cannot believe you two!”
Hue took a step away from Felix, “You cannot believe Felix, I didn't doubt your abilities! Nope! Never once!” She smiled to top off her lying.
“H-Hey, Hue!” He looked over to his friend.
“Sorry, you dug your own grave on this one! Hehe!” Said Felix's now ex-friend.
“I have had some training! And I grew up on some really tough streets, I know how to handle myself even around some gang members!” Bun huffed and puffed, ready to blow a house down.
“I'm sorry, Bun, I didn't mean to offend you.”
“Yeah, well... I forgive you, now let's stop wasting time and split up, I'll take... That one, the Bronze Stable. Meet back here in two hours, got it?” Bun's eyebrows crossed fiercely. Bun immediately checked the time and noted it down.
[01:03]
“Yes, missus commander Bunny!” Hue saluted and ran off to find her own target, and Felix soon followed her example after a sigh.
“Good, now.” She looked to the bar across the street, it was a reasonably sized tavern with hundreds of years of history in its well worn wooden walls. A large brown horse-shoe, presumably made of bronze judging by the name and all, shined at the center of the door and on each of its signs. Bun swiftly crossed the street and skipped to the door, confidently striding in and...
“Oh shit.” She cussed under her breath when she got a hoof into the tavern and saw the several parties of burly stallions and mares along the bar, in the many leather-clad booths and playing pool on the antique pool table sitting under a candle-lit chandelier. Each pony had a cold look in their eyes and a devilish smile under their cowfilly hats as they all looked in the direction of Bun's unfamiliar face. Each of them looked either strong and menacing or so drunk off their asses they couldn't tell a tiger from a tumbleweed.
Somehow she had stumbled into the most hardcore bar in all of Appaloosa.
Bun lowered her head to try and not cause a stir up as she trotted over to the bar and sat down in the furthest seat from anypony, she managed to sit somewhere somewhat isolated in the center of the bar. She looked over to the bartender and waited for his attention.
The bartender was not quick to attend her, but after a dozen minutes he finally walked up to the pink mare.
“What can I getchya, miss?” His fur was a dark brown, his teeth partially missing and a bartending vest worn with pride sat cleanly over his shoulders, his pulled back blonde mane wasn't a bit less maintained than the glossy countertop and each of his fine collection of drinking glasses.
Bun smiled up to him from her seat, making sure to put on a confident face. “I'd like a glass of your strongest stuff, and if you don't mind I'd like to ask a question or two about the city; I'm new here as I'm sure you can tell.”
“My strongest? Are you sure, miss? I don't want a flower like you bein' clipped somethin' I served ya.”
“Very sure, trust me, I'm no lightweight.” She eyed down the stallion.
“If ya insist.” The bartender took out his strongest bottle and poured her a glass, and while Bun drank it down she heard two ponies trot over behind her.
“Quite impressive for a young lass like you to be drinking like that.” A grizzled voice from a large Earth Pony wearing a short black cowfilly hat along with a studded leather vest complimented her while he sat in the available bar stool at her side, his less bulky friend sat on the opposite side of Bun, encapsulating her.
Bun scoffed, “What do you want, punk?”
He raised his eyebrow and the bartender took his leave. “Punk? That's quite rude of you, lass... You must not understand what me an' mah buddy came here for.” He leaned onto the bar and exposed the underside of his vest where a holster sat snuggled above his chest.
“Really? You really think you and your little buddy can take me on?” Bun lifted her head high in confidence.
“I really didn't wanna do this the hard way... Fitz, help me with our lovely lady here.” He sat up, and so did his friend, both grabbing Bun by either hoof of hers. She went to push the larger one off of herself, knowing full well she was capable, but just as the tussle began it ended as a gunshot rang through the entire tavern, every whisper ending to look over to the entrance.
“Get your filthy hooves off of my girl, Clank.” The mare spoke from the middle of the doorway, smoking gun held high in her non-missing wing, her fiery red fur glistening under the candlelight.
To Bun's surprise, the stallion stepped back. “Ace?! What in tartarus is the damned T-Rex doin' back in Appaloosa?”
“I hope it ain't to put a bullethole in your flank, Clank.” Ace strolled down the saloon while the ponies returned to their chats and drinks, only Clank and his friend Fitzgerald kept a close eye on the mare.
Bun felt a nudge at her side and she looked to the fear-stricken Fitz begging to her, “L-Look ma-am, I apologise, d-didn't mean no harm... I-I'll be off now...” He bolted back to the table with other thuggish looking stallions and sat down with them, all of them avoiding eye contact with Ace.
Clank growled, “Fuckin' coward... What do you want, Ace? This mare's new to town, you know that's fair game.”
Bun's eyes widened at the comment as she imagined how many ponies have had the misfortune of being forced upon by these thugs.
“I do know that, but she's already mine. You ain't touching her.” Ace strolled over and sat down where Fitz had fled from.
“What? That's bullshit, what's she to you anyway, a marefriend? I ain't ever hear you hooking up with a mare.” He yelled at Ace, ignoring Bun completely by this point.
“If ya must know, she is my marefriend, now scram.”
“Bullshit, prove i-”
Ace pulled Bun in and layed the pink mare over her lap and leaned down to kiss her deeply and sensually.
Bun nearly fainted. Her eyes wide, mouth moaning gently in surprise and body relaxing into the kiss, her heart fluttering to the top of her chest. She held Ace back tenderly, leaning into it after realising what was happening.
After only a few dozen lifetimes of kissing, Ace lifted her apparent marefriend back and looked at Clank.
“I... Fine... You're a lucky bitch to be the T-Rex's pet.” Clank directed the latter statement at Bun before trotting off in a huff.
Bun sat there completely stunned, she forgot what words were.
“S-Sorry bout that, Bun, I just had to get him off your back.” Ace whispered over as she dipped her hat down to cover her face.
“Ah... I... It's... F-Fine... H-Honestly I swear... I am just... Surprised... I think...” Bun blushed and giggled to herself.
“I-It's fine... L-Let's just not talk about it okay...” Ace begged of her.
“Y-Yeah... All right. Thank you though, Ace.”
“No need to thank me, jus' tell me how's your side of the investigation goin'?” She was still hiding her face, despite the fact she regained control of her voice, and she spoke somewhat distant, her mind in another place.
“It's been good; me, Felix and Hue are looking for some gang called the Vipers. I assume you're the same?”
“Mmm Hmm.” She nodded in confirmation, “I heard whispers of 'em a few years back when I still lived here... They musta grown since then.”
“All right... I was about to ask the bartender about it before you know, all that.” Bun chuckled gently.
“Sounds good...” Ace looked over to him serving someone else. “Jack might even give you a straight answer now that I'm here, heh.”
“Heh, right. Well, while we wait, you mind telling me why that Clank guy was calling you the 'T-Rex'?” Bun watched as Ace raised her hat up once more, no longer having anything to hide.
Ace had a little wicked smile, “Oh nothin', just a nickname I picked up here, you know what a T-Rex is? It's this fictional beast that's sorta like a dragon. Ponies call me that cause I once killed a pony using just my teeth... Not a story I wanna get into at the moment though.”
Bun giggled, “I used to read comic books, I know about dinosaurs. That's cool.”
The bartender, or 'Jack' as Bun came to know him as, slid over with apology in his eyes and voice. “I hope you may excuse me, Ace and Ace's assuredly wonderful mistress, didn't know who you were. How can I help?” He bowed his head to Bun, trying to make up for his sub-par service from prior.
“Oh grow some balls, Jack,” Ace laughed to him, “Get us a whiskey each and tell me about this Vipers gang.”
“Right away, ma-am.” He poured two glasses of a fine drink for the two ladies, “Vipers are just a buncha no good hoodlums, I don't serve 'em in my house.”
“Would you know where we could find them, sir?” Bun asked politely.
“I heard they like to hang around this old abandoned apple orchard east of the city, they extort ponies comin' down the road that way to get to the badlands. The name escapes me.” Jack replied.
Ace jumped a little, “You wouldn't mean Goldlake farms by any chance, would ya?”
“That's the one.” The bartender nodded.
“Well, that's very helpful, Jack. I hope to see you sometime later when I ain't workin'.” Ace carelessly threw a few bits onto the counter and took Bun's shoulder with her left and only wing and walked her out while she thanked the Bartender. “So, Bun, Appaloosa treatin' ya well?” Ace grinned once outside.
“Wouldn't say that exactly... Hey, I forgot to ask, how did you find me?” Bun smiled to herself, knowing full well what Ace's answer would include.
“I can sense valuables, Bun, your gem heart is like a beacon to me.” Ace calmly explained.
“Aw shucks.” Bun nudged Ace playfully, “I'm happy you think so~”
“N-No, wait!” Ace growled and dropped her hat down to hide herself once more. “I meant monetarily! I-It would sell for a lot of bits, I w-wasn't using my power like... Well.. Ehh...” Ace caught sight of Bun giggling like a schoolfilly. “I will throw your ass back in there, you bitch!” Ace harshly pointed her wing at the bar, flustered and breathing heavily.
“I apologise! I was kidding, let's just wait for Hue and Felix.” Bun brought Ace back to their arranged meeting spot.
“G-Good... How long until they get here?” Ace blurted out.
“Uh... Oh...”
[01:31]
“Um... An hour and a half...” Bun blushed.
Ace's eyebrows crossed like daggers, very soft furry daggers made out of hair. “You're kiddin', right?”
“Uh, no... Guess I miscalculated how long this would take.”
“Follow me.”
“W-Wait are we gonna...” Bun watched as Ace trotted right off, and she galloped on after.
“Nope.” Bun and Ace were in the middle of a conversation while taking the eastern highway off Appaloosa, though it wasn't much more than dust formed into a thick line where they were at. It was very early morning, just before sunrise, and the moon was still out, sitting proudly high above them in the sky. “But I imagine you've been here a while?”
“Born an' raised.” Ace nodded. “Only time I left was to start stealing from bigger fish in the bigger cities a few years ago.”
“Got any fun stories for me?” Bun said slyly, “I'd love to see how the great T-Rex spins a tale.”
“Glad to hear you're so interested, how 'bout I tell ya about my biggest job, the Canterlot job.” Ace smiled to Bun, her dark gray eyes were filled with the desert's moon, filling up with the soft blue and yellow pastel's of sky and sand like two pools of dye.
“I would absolutely love to hear about that.” Bun gave her a heartfelt smile.
Ace tipped her hat, “So, every filly knows about the princess in canterlot, and I've always been fascinated with what immense treasures Celestia could be holding.” Ace looked down the road, the moonlight fondly grazing her back fur. She noticed a group of thugs wearing sombrero's walking in their direction, “Oh, hold up, buttercup, we've got a snake down the trail.”
“Oh damn... Do you think it's them?” Bun took a step back, holding a defensive stance.
“I'm as sure as the sun is hot.” Ace gripped the handle of her machete with her wing, taking it out and holding it hidden at her flank.
“Hmm... You don't mind me trying something crazy do you?” Bun raised an eyebrow.
Ace enjoyed that, “Go for it.”
“Howdy, ladies, what brings ya to the land of dragons?” A stallion yelled over as the group trotted, a mare from the group adding in her own word. “Hope ya'll have been havin' a nice walk.” A third joined in, “Yeah, lovely weather we're havin' ain't it?”
“Actually now that you mention it, it's been lovely, thank you.” Bun smiled confidently, a deep spark of chaos drove her.
Ace turned her head softly away from Bun, “Ya'll the Vipers?”
The group came closer to them, becoming more defined out of the blurring horizon of the desert. They laughed really hard.
“Ah, I'm sorry, ya'll came down here knowing what was gon' happen? You two must be dumb as rocks.” The head pony stated, pinning up his hat to reveal his light tanned fur face and crystal blue eyes.
“Yeah, we know who ya'll are... But do you know who I am?” Ace stepped with her side exposed to the pony, respectfully exposing her cutie mark to give him the best chance at guessing at her identity. Her cutie mark shone in the cool moonlight, a greatly acclaimed symbol sitting on her haunches.
“Nope, don't know a thing about you. An' why should I?” He growled.
“Thing is, you do know who I am, you just aren't aware of it yet.” She stood face to face with him once more, “The name Ace Derby ring a bell? I don't like to toot my own horn but I'm somewhat of a local legend.”
They pony furrowed their eyebrows and bared his teeth, “Always sounded like a washed out ol' cowpony who got lost to me.”
“Trust me, buttercup, never lost a thing in my life.” Ace exposed her machete, sounding that it was time to fight.
“HEY! What's that over there!?” Bun yelled and pointed behind the group, only one of the thugs falling for her blatant trick, turning around all the way to find that Bun was standing directly behind her. “Gotchya!” Bun exclaimed as she landed a quick punch on the pony, launching them to the side, their hat was thrown off their bleeding forehead as they fell into the sand. “Ha! It actually worked!”
“Leave Ace to me! You two grab the pink one!” The stallion pulled out a revolver from beneath his vest, holding it tight in his jaws and aiming over to Ace, who bolted at him, machete in tow.
Bun, on the other side of the thieves, grounded herself against the two remaining lackeys as one drew a club and the other a leather whip. “Hey there, friends! I hope ya'll don't mind me testing more tricks on you! Oh, look at me, saying 'ya'll', I feel like a cowfilly already!”
“Shut your trap, weasel!” The one with the club yelled out before dashing at Bun, swinging her weapon at the giggling pony.
Bun threw her hooves at the weapon, taking a small bruise to her hoof in order to catch the club in both hooves and wrap herself around it. Then she pulled herself away and with a spark of her magic, suddenly the club was gone, and in its place the pony held a bouquet of flowers. “Tada! Hahaha!” She sat back and did jazz hooves.
This quickly proved to be her downfall as her other opponent slung the whip around her neck and yanked her in, toppling her over and leaving her to be grabbed by the now unarmed mare. “A-Ah! Shit! F-Fine, less showmareship!” Bun stuttered out while being tackled by both ponies.
She was held down by one while the other kicked her stomach with deadly force, the metal chassis under her fur being dented inward, “Fuck!”
Bun concentrated on her inner magic, going with its chaotic flow best she could. She sent the power down through her tail, gaining an impossible level of control over the strands of hair, she slid it up the side of the pony that kicked her and wrapped it around his neck, pulling back with all her strength.
As the pony was being yanked downward, they used this momentum to land a knee-slam underneath her belly, in the place that cannot bedescribed without having to mark this as a 'mature' story.
“Ahhh!” She screamed, even with the immensely different version of 'pain' her robotic body felt, she felt that one. “Urrghh! G-Get off!” She concentrated her strength into her upper hooves, pulling the mare down with enhanced cybernetic muscles and throwing her into the sand. She then kicked the stallion at her hind legs away and stood up, quickly tossing the sand around her up into the air which concealed herself briefly.
She made her voice low and smooth as best she could to speak. “I've got two guns, one for each of ya.” When the dust cloud cleared Bun was wearing a cowfilly hat she managed to take from the mare she fought, along with two revolvers, one held high in each hoof. (She was holding them with the flat bases of her hooves, despite the weapons being designed for a mouth.)
“W-What the? H-How?!” The thugs checked their empty holsters. “Y-You bitch!”
“Sorry, not sorry!” Bun then shot, her pieces destroying the air with repeating explosions, the bullets tearing the ponies open. They were long dead by the time Bun ran out of bullets and threw the guns down to take a breath.
“Nice one, Bun!” Ace mustered while tussling with the head of this group, holding him by the neck with her machete while tying up his hooves with his own lasso. “So, you gon' tell us your name?” Ace smiled down to the restrained stallion.
“Y-You bitches! You killed Slide and Drillbit!” The pony struggled before promptly being reminded of his situation when Ace pulled the machete's edge up to his throat. “A-Ahh! My name is Wick! Wick Queller!”
“Thank ya, Wick, now I only have one lil' question for ya, where can I find your leader?” Ace gave his throat some room to speak.
“F-Fuck you! I ain't te-”
Ace pulled up her revolver in her wing and shot the lackey Bun knocked out at the very start, killing them immediately. “Rethink your answer.”
“Ah! Y-You! Y-You bitch!” He yelled, and the revolver was placed against his temple. “F-Fine!! P-Please don't kill me! V-Viper is at the home, it's about five miles that way!” He pointed off into the distance.
“My gracious thanks, Wick.” Ace slipped the revolver down to his hooves and with a bang bang, his two forelegs were left bleeding. Ace threw him onto the dirt path. “Hope I never got to see your face again. Let's go, Bun.” She holstered her weapon and trotted away from the crying and crippled pony.
Bun followed quickly, leaving Wick all alone.
“Good work back there, I thought I might have had to help, but you took those two really well.” Ace tipped her hat to Bun.
Bun sighed and giggled delicately. “Yeah... Though I kinda tried to rely on my magic a bit too much; got carried away. They would have had me if I wasn't so much physically stronger.”
“You're learnin', no need to put yourself down. Ya did great. I liked your lil' tricks too, they were kinda funny.” Ace gave her a pat on the back, “How does that magic of yours work anyway? I don't exactly see a horn on ya.”
“T-Thanks... Hehe, well, it's a bit complicated... There's just a pool of chaotic energy inside me, and the way a unicorn focuses their magic into their horn I can focus it into different parts of my body, and then the magic can let me do more than what is physically possible normally. Like if I focus it into my tail I can do this.” She concentrated a moment and stood up on her tail and then she bounced on it like it was a pogo-stick.
“Wowie, that's mighty interestin'.” Ace laughed to herself.
“Yeah, problem is controlling the damn stuff... I have to kinda guide the magic, like when I shouted that there was something behind those ponies, once that mare turned around I was able to teleport over. I gave my magic an opening and that let me kinda know what it was going to do.” Bun's cheeks burned up a little. “Am I over explaining it..?”
Ace shook her head and chuckled. “Not at all, buttercup.”
“Right... Well, you were telling me about your heist?” Bun and Ace trotted on, getting ever closer to the Vipers’ den.
“Indeed I was, now where did I leave off?”
“Probably somewhere in there, though it doesn't look like a secret lair for a gang.” Bun suggested; she was sitting behind a dead tree with Ace inspecting the abandoned apple orchard, noting the large and mildly preserved barn.
“Hmm... One moment...” Ace steadied her vision and looked to the barn. She grew a little frustrated and covered her face with her hat after a momentary glance at Bun. “G-Gimmie one moment, my sense of valuables is a bit fuzzy from this distance...”
Bun turned to her a little bewildered but nodding. “Go on.”
“Thanks...” Ace hopped over to the next tree over, finally being able to use her ability as she scanned the barn. “There's a buncha bits in there, a real nice rifle... That's about all I can see.”
“Well, how are we going in?” Bun trotted up behind her ally carefully.
“I have been itching for a good ol' fashioned shootout, if you're up for it of course.” Ace gleamed.
“You bore witness to the first time I've ever shot somepony, I don't know if I can be very helpful. I'd probably be more use standing off at the side being pretty and cheering you on.” Bun placed a hoof on her cheek and struck a pose. “Whatya think?”
“D-Do you gotta tease me? I-It's really not the time...” Ace turned her face away from Bun to look at the buildings of the orchard.
“My apologies... How about I call out their locations? I can set my vision to infa-red and see where they are very clearly.” Bun gave a legitimate suggestion for once.
“Yeah... Sounds all right.” Ace took out a small earpiece from her a pocket under her vest and placed it into her ear. “Can you connect to this thing?”
“All right... And I'm connected, can you hear me?” Bun covered her mouth to make it more clear if the sound was coming from the earpiece or not.
“Clear as a whisky glass.” Ace pulled out her revolver and held it to her side. “I'll go on in then, don't get spotted.”
“Will do, good luck!”
“Thank you.” Ace grinned and let herself out into the open, trotting down towards the farmhouse, making herself known. “Howdy! I'm here to speak with your leader!”
A lot of disturbed rustling came from inside before an answer. “W-Who in Equestria is out there?! What's your name?!”
“Ace Derby! Now come on out here and let's have a civil talk.” Ace came up to the gate and leaned up against it.
Bun made her way to the side of the complex, watching closely in her infa-red, she saw anothercreatureflanking. “Ace there is a pony climbing up the silo, I think they have a rifle.”
“Thank you kindly.” Ace whispered to her earpiece and spotted the pony herself. She holstered her pistol to equip her machete and with a hearty chuck she sent her blade into the side of the silo as close to the ladder as she could, the pony climbing it yelped and fell a few dozen hooves to the ground, straining their legs and wincing in pain. “Ya'll better not try be all sneaky on me! Come out an' face me if you wanna face me!”
“F-Fine, have it your way! Get her!” Came a voice from inside and several doors were then kicked open from every side of the building.
“Coming out of the farmhouse, there's... Seven? Eight maybe. Watch out, Ace!” Bun hunkered down behind a tree.
“Don't worry about me, buttercup, it's not my first rodeo.” Ace retook her six shooter into her wing and sprang it up to her sightline, an elegant placement of bullets left the most exposed of her targets on the floor in the first few seconds as ponies sprinted out from the front, back and side doors of the farmhouse.
With six shots Ace managed to kill four of the eight right off the bat, their bodies tumbling down into the sand as their buddies took cover and went to fire back.
Ace smiled at her work and at the adrenaline, reloading her revolver while sliding down behind the gate to keep cover as bullets whizzed down by her, though the protection left her blind to where to shoot next. “B-Bun, give me their positions. I'ma try get 'em in one sweep.” Her voice was a tad cocky.
“Okay, well, there's one a meter to the right of the main entrance on the farmhouse, another running up along the left side of the house, a third is by the side of the riflepony that fell off the silo, last one ran behind a tractor at your ten o-clock.” Bun's eyes flicked back and forth making clicking noises as she locked on to each pony.
“Thanks!” Ace waited for a lull in the enemies’ barrage, and the moment the air stilled from gunfire she hopped up over the fence with her gun at the ready, with a flick to the farmhouse and a single round sent at the pony peaking up from behind the house's railing, she had landed a killing shot, the porch being doused with blood.
“One!” Ace yelled out to herself in victory and ran towards the silo, on the way the pony from behind the tractor popped out and Ace let her hooves out from underneath her to fall into the sand, the thug missing their shot while Ace lined up hers, a pulled trigger later she had killed another. “Two!”
She got back up and sprinted to the Silo and used her momentum to ride up the side, climbing halfway up it to hook her foreleg around her embedded machete she threw earlier, spinning her head and wing back around just in time to catch the flanking pony run into the open. She saw them pause for a moment in confusion as Ace was not to be found anywhere on the ground, making them an laughably easy target. “Three!” Her revolver's chamber rolled over to the next bullet.
As she hung from the Silo she was hit with a long, nasty rotting smell, the stench of death was coming from inside this thing, though she didn't have time to worry about that.
Ace looked over to her last target; they were struggling on the ground dragging the pony that fell off the ladder into the house. “Heh...” She grinned and took three easy shots at them, one to shoot the pony’s hat off, one at the doorway they were heading for and the last at the sand under their hooves. “Four, Five, Six!” She holstered her weapon and pulled the machete out of the metal shell of the silo, leaping down beside the toppled over pony.
“Hey there!” Ace pressed her hoof against their chest and pinned them down against the sand. They were a young stallion with a short stubble and a long dirty mane. “I see you were helpin' your friend there, I find that quite honourable, even enough to maybe let you live. Though first I wanna know what kind of pony you are, what your heart truly desires.”
The stallion shook and stumbled over his words, “W-Wha, mnff, wait! P-Please!”
“Quiet while I'm bein' merciful all right?” Ace leaned in and planted a kiss on the pony’s lips, her inner magic activating at the touch. She immediately knew all of this pony’s deepest desires, better than even the stallion themselves could. “Oh my, that's...” Ace smiled over at the unconscious mare she had knocked off the silo earlier and saw that her hind leg was completely fractured, but not badly enough to kill her. “... quite adorable, you and your lover can run along now.” Ace took her hoof off of the stallion.
“T-T-Thank you... M-Miss...” The stallion blurted out, picking up his mare and trotting with her away from the house.
Ace watched as they went off, her heart a little warm.
“Aww... That's really nice of you, letting those two go. And you did some amazing shooting too!” Bun said through Ace's earpiece while trotting on up.
“I never kill in cold blood, and he didn't care about anythin' apart from that mare, how could I not let 'em go?” Ace tipped her hat back and reloaded her revolver. “Now let's see if we can make this snake rattle.”
“I like your attitude! Let's go!” Bun ran over to the side entrance of the farmhouse, opening the door which Ace already helpfully marked with a bullet hole.
“I can smell some bits moving around in the basement; seems this Viper is trying to hide from us.” Ace trotted into the rundown and unwashed home, they strolled through a chewed up kitchen and into a hallway.
In the hallway a staircase led up to the second story, but the two mares were far more interested in underneath the staircase, which had a small spandrel door that gave way into a closet. Inside lay a busted up washing machine from at least a hundred years ago, and not much else.
“Huh... Guess the way down has to be somewhere else...” Bun commented and turned her head to scan around the room.
“I disagree...” Ace slid her hoof over the washing machine's face-plate. “The dust was disturbed, which implies...” She pulled on the panel and it gave out instantaneously and it fell down to the floor with a thud and crash, the insides of the ancient device exposed.
The guts of the machine machine were gone and replaced with a tunnel leading into the cellar hatch hidden beneath.
“See?” Ace grinned.
“Wow, you don't stop impressing me, do you? Hehe.” Bun bumped her rump against Ace's side playfully and then poked her head into the darkness of the cellar, her eyes adjusting to night vision as she crawled in.
“W-Well... I ain't tryin to...” Ace gently tipped her hat down and lowered her head, waiting for Bun to finish getting inside before slipping in herself.
The two traveled down each dusty stone step carefully into the dim cellar, the scent of mold and aged alcohol slipping through the air around them. Each step echoed like a miniature wave of thunder, the clatter of hooves reached the cooled stone bottom and their eyes searched around the room.
Bun's eyes supplied the most light out of anything down here, revealing a hazy general layout to Ace, who relied on her treasure sense to guide her forward. They bumped past dried out bottles and barrels of cider and stale stores of bread and rotted hay to reach a large farm tool cupboard at the very back.
Ace and Bun tried their best to keep their hoofsteps quiet as they approached, the smooth stone flooring making it a hassle, but they managed. The two reached the cupboard and looked to each other with nods and Ace placed her wing on the handle, with a rhythmic 'three, two, one' being mouthed to Bun, she swung the door open.
The moment the cupboard opened a gunshot went off into the darkness from inside, Bun's eyesight allowed her to see the greenly-highlighted pony hiding inside with her revolver stuck in her mouth. The bullet ricocheted around the cellar, getting absorbed by the mass of decayed furniture.
Bun pushed herself in, pinning the pony down and pressing her head up with the pistol as the accosted mare attempted to fire off the last five rounds she had left, all of them landing in a scatter at the top of the cupboard. “Mfff! Grr!” The pony inside squirmed and spat her gun out, “Die, ya bastards!” She screamed out enough to peak Bun's hearing and she kicked Bun down in the stomach.
Bun tumbled back to the ground and was jumped on by the mare, something sharp and pointy being stuck into her neck in the commotion. “A-Ah! Get off of me!” Bun struggled back and wrapped herself around the mare, her greater brawn helping her edge out a pin on her assailant. “Gotchya! Argh!” Bun felt the pony end her resistance.
“B-Bun are you okay?!” Ace called out, finding it hard to see clearly.
“Yeah! No worries!” She cheerfully replied.
“Hahahah! Hahaha! I don't know who you are! But I'm ever so happy to watch you die right now!” The pony blurted out maniacally.
“D-Die right now?” Bun's voice rose and grew defensive.
“Yes! The poison will end you so very soon! Any second now!” She kept going.
Bun just became more confused, but then she figured it out once her eyes caught sight of a needle sticking out of the lower right side of her neck. “Ohhhh! You poisoned me! Right. I get it now.”
“Yes! Yes! And you shall die in utter pain! Y-Y... Why aren't you screaming in pain?” Her voice turned on a dime, from evil and insane to concerned and blunt with no inbetween.
“Oh, well, um... Sorry to say this, I'm a robot... Soooooo...” Bun bit on the needle and yanked it out, letting it drop onto the floor. “How about we have a little chat upstairs where we can see each other more clearly?”
“A... I... Uh............” The pony choked.
“I'll take that as a yes!” Bun picked up the pony by the collar and pulled her up to the stairs with Ace following behind at a safe distance.
Once they brought out the mare, Bun finally could get a good look at her. She saw that the mare's coat and mane were genuinely bright green without her night-vision active, and that her cutie mark was a venom-soaked fang. She was tied up against a chair inside the kitchen, still unable to comprehend how in Equestria she ran into the one pony who wouldn't die to her deadly toxin.
“So... You're the Viper I presume?” Bun asked and turned to Ace and then back to the helpless mare.
“I... I am... Y-Yes...” She stammered out.
Ace tipped her hat, “Pleasure to make your acquaintance. We're just here to ask you a few questions about your... Business.”
“W-What? You want money? Is that it? Who sent you? T-The Dodgers? The Sweepin' Mares? W-Who?!” The Viper began to panic and writhe in her seat.
“Nobody that concerns you, and we wanna know about the corpses you've been sellin'. From what I know, there's some Zebra in the market for fresh dead meat and you’re their hook up.” Ace took another seat and pulled it under her.
The Viper laughed, completely brimming with anxiety. “Y-You just wanna know about that?! R-Really? Look! I-I ain't even do much! I'm just a middlemare! I obtain the dead ponies from all sortsa gangs around Equestria, w-we keep em in the Silo an' then smuggle 'em south every few weeks...”
Ace was pleased, but not done. “That all is mighty good to know, but we really just need one thing and one thing only... To know who you're supplyin' and how we can reach that individual.”
“I-I'll tell ya if you don't kill me!” She begged, shaking to the core.
“Fine... I won't lay a toe on ya.” Ace nodded to Bun, “Yeah, so tell us.”
“All right! It's this Zebra, Xavierian Deathtouch! That's his name! H-He wants his next shipment in three days, we always meet him on the border to Moonstone off the Appaloosa highway! H-He wears a big dark cloak!” She took some large breaths to try and contain herself, “Ya gonna let me go now?”
“That's exactly the kinda thing I wanted to hear! And sadly we can't just let you go, we're gonna call the sheriff, and you're gonna be going away for a long time. Bun... Knock her out so she doesn't go anywhere.” Ace kicked her chair off and stood up, letting her seat fall back onto the floor and splinter a little against the floorboard.
“Gladly, Ace.” Bun wound back her hoof.
“W-Wait!! No! Y-You said!” The Viper got much louder once more.
“I said I wouldn't lay a toe on ya, and I ain't gonna, cause I'm a mare of my word. Goodnight now.” The last thing the Viper saw was Ace's devilish grin before Bun knocked her lights out, the pony being thrown back in her chair against the floor, her forehead leaking out red blots of blood against her dusty green fur.
“That went better than expected.” Bun noted as she wiped her hoof clean.
“Yeah... This whole thing has been going great... Let's get back to the city quickly now, we need to notify the sheriff and tell Felix and Hue what we know.” Ace picked herself up and went to the door, holding it open for Bun.
“Sounds good! Let's go!” Bun ran out with a big smile on her face, her heart filled with adventure.
Seeing this really made Ace smile, “Heh... You're real cheery...” Her voice wavered slightly.
“Hehe, why wouldn't I be! This has been awesome!” Bun turned around once outside, seeing Ace covering her face with her hat. Again. “Hey, Ace, why do you keep doing that?”
“Doin' what?” Ace gulped and took a step out of the doorway, but not an inch further once she stood on soil.
“You keep covering your face! Whatchya hiding?” Bun trotted up gentle and curious, trying to show a soft tenderness to ease Ace's nerves.
“W-What do you mean? I ain't hidin' nothing! I! I...” Ace squabbled, but Bun simply tilted Ace's hat all the way up until her face was fully visible.
She was blushing.
Ace was blushing hard, her cheeks burned bright and pink against her solid red fur, her eyes quivered in reserved embarrassment. “W-W... What? Whatchya lookin' at?” Ace did her best to cover it up.
“You're blushing!” Bun's smile widened greatly, “It's adorable! You really shouldn't hide it, I'd love it if you let yourself be seen like this.”
“Ah! D-Don't! Stop saying stuff like that!” Ace turned her head away.
“I'm sorry, I'm just trying to be supportive...” Bun whimpered.
“N-No... It's... Uh... It's not that...” Ace forgot how to formulate her sentences.
“W-What is it then? I'm really sorry if I overstepped my bounds...”
Ace growled at herself and grit her teeth, “Bun!”
“Yeah..?”
“Y-You know my talent... Have I told you..? W-What I can do to others...” Ace mumbled under her breath.
“Uh... Oh, yeah... You can tell what others’ deepest desires are if you feel them up or...” Bun's eyes went wide. “Or you... K-Kiss them...”
Now both mares were blushing hard.
“B-Bun... When I kissed you back at the bar... I... W-Well... Mnff... W-Why do you like me so darn much?!” Ace's eyes looked up to Bun sheepishly as she pleaded for an answer.
Bun gulped. “I... I dunno... I just... I've always liked bold... Adventurous ponies like yourself... And when we first met you reminded me of Rainbow Dash... Do you know her? She was this famous wonderbolt... From before I was born... She was my idol... And well, I guess that's kinda where I get my tastes from... I'm sorry...” Bun dropped her head.
“N-No, Bun it's okay... I...” Ace swallowed her words, “I just never had no pony ever feel about me in that way... Being a Pegasus in Appaloosa... Everypony always either thought I was worthless if they didn't know me well, an' if they did... They were scared of me... Nopony has ever... F-Flirted with me before, I'm just not used to it.”
“So, you didn't mind me calling you cute..? Or any of the flirting from before..?” Bun let out a cute little hopeful smile.
“N-No... Not necessarily...” Ace took a deep breath and composed herself, “B-But I need time to settle my thoughts, and think about what I want... So until then... Would you mind stoppin'? Just for a lil' while so I can think this through clearly..?”
“Yes! Of course! I won't say anything even remotely suggestive, I promise.” Bun sighed in relief.
So did Ace. “Thank you... It's been tough not to let it distract me... Heh...” Ace rubbed the back of her head. “C-Can I say something though? Before we pause the flirtin'..?”
“Sure, anything.” Bun helped Ace begin walking along with her, the two of them trotting down towards the road side by side as the sun rose in the distance, breaching through the horizon it shone shattered light into the deep abyss of the cosmos, bleeding up into it and illuminating everything across the desert in its roasting orange glow.
“You're quite cute yourself...” Ace blushed.
Bun knew she blushed because Ace didn't cover her face in her hat this time, she could see it plainly across her soft yet rugged features, the lovely little pink highlight of her cheeks.
Bun smiled and blushed along with her. “Thank you, Ace. Thank you very much.”
“YOU'RE WELCOME?!?!” Hue was a tad bit mad. “WE WAITED FOR LIKE!! TWO THOUSAND HOURS! WHERE WERE YOU?!!!”
“Gettin' the information, whatchya think?” Ace sat right on down in the bar's booth.
“I THINK that you should have called us! I was cold! And lost! And Felix was scared!” Hue yelled far too loudly for anyone's comfort.
“H-Hey! I... I wasn't scared!” Felix blushed and hid from looks from around the bar.
“Look at him! He's still shaking!” Hue grabbed Felix by the shoulders and shook him dizzy.
“I'm really sorry, Hue, I should have told you. But we did just fine, so there's nothing to worry about anymore, maybe apart from getting back to Maverick and reporting.” Bun gave her drink a hug and took a sip from the steamy cup.
“W-W-W-Wh-hi-c-ch... Hue!” Felix pushed her hooves off of himself. “Ah... Which is why we should get going as soon as possible.”
“I agree with shifty over 'ere, we should bolt before the sun finishes comin' up.” Ace stood up and leaned against the table, giving a look to the bubbly spy and the cute robot.
“Y-Yeah... We should go. So much for relaxing with a coco...” Bun whimpered and drank down the fresh and roasting hot chocolate, she felt the heat coarse down her throat, but even though she could tell it would burn the mouth of a fleshy pony, it phased her not.
“FINE! But I'm not happy about it! Mnnff!” Hue stomped out of the booth and Felix followed swiftly.
The quad-squad trotted down the sleepy streets of a sun-rising Appaloosa, traveling out of the city to nearest Shadow Service issued magic-elevator.
A zap, a zoop and a tired Felix begging Hue to, for the love of all that Celestia's sun touches, please stop making elevator noises with her mouth later, they found themselves exiting into the Shadow Service headquarters.
They spilled out into the vacant lobby, speckling the floors with scattered sand that had stuck to their hooves. Bun lead them inside, passing the resting Blood Diamond on their way.
The elegant pony fixed the subtle reading glasses grazing the back of her crimson mane and lowered her tea. “Busy first day, Miss Button?” She spoke aloud while they passed, though a hovering newspaper clasped in Blood Diamond's magic kept her eyes' attention.
“Yeah, you could say that... Is Maverick here yet?” Bun glanced over and stopped for this brief exchange.
“Well...” Blood Diamond took out her sleek smartphone and checked the time. “It's four minutes past seven, and we're required to be here at twelve sharp... So, he'll most likely be here in five hours and fifty six minutes.”
Bun nodded along, and quirked an eyebrow at her math. “U-Hh, wouldn't that be an hour la... Oh...” She kicked herself a little.
Blood Diamond let out a simple and practiced giggle. “I know, I'm quite the joker outside work hours, he'll be here at twelve, don't you worry.” She returned to her tea.
“Thank you, have a good one!” Bun looked over at her friends with a nod and smile, continuing her walk to the training room reserved for them, the sounds of a grumbly half-argument pushing out from its walls.
“H-Hello?” Bun mumbled under her breath as her hoof pressed the door in slowly, her eye slipping its sightline through the crack as the door opened. Inside she witnessed the silver coated knight in shining frustration known as Pious Duty trying to reason with the five hundred pound behemoth of a dragon.
“-even listening to me? How do you expect me to explain what you did to Maverick?” He shook his hoof and glared deep into the giant beast's eyes.
The dragon shrugged.
Pious turned his head over to the door, eyes worn down from the sleepless day. “Greetings, friends, I do hope your nights bore more fruit than mine.”
Bun and her three followers trotted up to the duo. “We probably did actually, we have the lead Maverick told us to find.”
“Wonderful, I was worried we would fail and I'd hold the blame... Since I doubt the beast would fess up.” He scowled back at the dragon, who crossed his arms and shook his head with his slivers for eyes wandering around the room, a soft grumble leaving his throat.
“Aw, come on, don't be hard on him. I'm sure it wasn't that bad.” Bun cooed up at the dragon with a heartfelt smile.
“He set a civilian's house on fire while we were in pursuit, the ponies inside would have died if I weren't there.” Pious shook his head along with a sigh.
“O-Oh... Well... Okay, but I'm sure he didn't mean it.” Bun's smile grew awkward.
“If you believe so.” Pious trotted by to sit down with the other three at the edge of the room, leaving Bun stranded in the center of the hall with the grumpy red beast a hoof or two away. She turned her head up for her eyes to meet with the dragon, being quickly thrown off by him as he crossed his arms and stomped out the room in a huff.
“Mnn... Buddy...” Bun softly cooed as she watched him leave. After a short look back at the group as they reunited with Pious, she took a quick jog out after the big red beast. She slipped out the training room door to find him slumped over in the hallways, looking like a real grump. "Hey... You okay..?" She whispered over while approaching.
He shook his head.
“Aw... It's okay... Do you wanna talk about it?” The pink robo-pony scooted up beside him, placing a hoof on his monstrous thigh, staring up to his eyes. "You can trust me, I won't judge you, I promise."
“Mfnnf...” He snorted.
“I'm very sorry to hear that... But everybody has emotions, you don't have to be embarrassed about them... Tell me what's gotten you in such a bad mood.” She placed her head down against his arm, her furred cheek rubbing up against the sheen of scales.
Smoke puffed from the side of his mouth.
“Really? He said all that? Oh, darling...” Bun dug the side of her head against his belly and wrapped around him in a fearless hug. "Everyone makes mistakes... I think he just doesn't get how hard it is sometimes being a dragon, being so big makes it hard to live in a world of ponies, especially when so many are scared of you."
He nodded, then grumbled.
“Really? That's what happened? Well, that isn't your fault at all!” Bun leaned away to gain a sympathetic sightline with him. "Why don't you tell him? Surely he'd believe you."
"Grf... Rurr..." He let out a somber whine.
Bun slumped down against him, resonating with his disappointment. “Ohh... He doesn't listen? I understand... Sometimes people just won't listen...”
He shook her and muttered. "Mnff..."
“Oh.” She blinked. "You mean, he just, actually can’t understand you speaking. Right." Her eyes crossed and ears perked up. "W-Wait I can... Understand... Why can I... Understand?... Ah, screw it, probably not the weirdest effect of chaos magic I've felt so far."
"Heh... Heh..." The dragon chuckled, bringing Bun up in his encompassing claws, lifting her into his chest for a massive hug. A massive, bone crushing, hug. Making Bun extremely thankful she no longer had any bones as she squeaked like a dog toy and cuddled him back.
“Y-You’re... Welcome! A-Ah!” She got out as her biomechanical throat was shoved up against the dragon's soft underbelly, giggling herself too.
Their friendly embrace was ended once their dark navy-furred commander rolled up in their business. "Yo! Smaug, Ropony-cop, quit with the cuddling, I wanna do a roundup before twelve, get your butts in here." He shouldered through the training room door.
The dragon dropped Bun gently to her hooves. "Thanks... Let's get in there, bud." They both shared a nod and traced Maverick's path in, gathering in a circle around him as he drank from a steaming paper coffee cup, a dark scarf drooping from around his neck.
“Kay... So. Did you do it? The thing, whatever I told you to do yesterday.” He took a looooooong slurp.
Ace tipped her hat up. “Uh... Yeah, we got names and locations of the guy payin' for these murders, some zebra named Xavierian Deathtouch, they were going to meet him in three days where the Appaloosa highway meets Moonstone.”
Maverick sighed in delight, they grew up so fast. “Nice. Good work, team, that's exactly the info our information team got. So, that's all you got?”
“Was there anything else we were supposed to find out..?” Felix interjected with a wobbly raised hoof.
Maverick couldn't help himself but to chuckle. “Nah, that was it, I'm just trying to fill time until twelve, I'm not exactly enthused to hear Bloody Mary give a speech about the Shadow Service's financial status.” He took another chug and finished his cup. “Aaghh, I swear, nondescript coffee brand kinda sucks... Anyways, I was about to say that your next mission is in three days, the capture and or disposal of this necromancer, we'll be going through the plan after the meeting. Any questions?”
The six of them took some looks at one-another, none of them really wanting to speak up.
“Glad we're all in agreement. You're all dismissed, we have five minutes, so go read a book or something, I dunno what you... "ponies" do.” Maverick began trotting to the door.
Pious felt the need to speak up. “S-Sir... Aren't you a po-”
“Shhhhhhhh...” He put a hoof over his lips while sliding out of the door backwards until he vanished out of the frame.
More glances bounced around the room, the silence broken by Hue after a few seconds. “Should we... Go wait for the meeting?”
Everyone nodded, then left.
Nearly ten minutes later the facility was packed with all her agents and the meeting hall boomed with life for the brief horizon between everyone packing in and the stage being taken by the head of the organisation, Chariots Jobstone.
For the next hour they went through the tedium of overviewing today's tasks, reviewing yesterday's work and a dozen other things my editor said are boring and don't need to be listed. And despite trying her best, Bun could pay attention to none of it as Hue continuously went between trying to chat with her and Felix throughout the entire thing.
That finished and soon a lunch was had, the six sitting across from each other on benches, all together at a table as they ate.
“Swo... Mmm, plan twime.” Maverick pulled up a stool at the head of the table, mouth full of apple. “Whatchya guys got?”
Hue leapt up with waving hooves. “Ooh! Yes! Please! Now you have to listen to me!”
Every non-Maverick creature at the table sighed at Hue's eagerness, while he just chuckled. “Yes, Hue, go right ahead.”
She took a deep breath. “OKAY! So, I have the perfect plan that I kept trying to tell Bun, but she kept shushing me, anyways, so this is how it goes down. Felix, disguised as a gang member, brings me and Hue, disguised as dead bodies, to the meeting location. Then, once Xavierian comes out to collect 'our souls' or whatever, Ace is ready with a sniper rifle watching us approach while Pious is with her watching out for ambushes, meanwhile dragon is flying around nearby which won’t be suspicious because the badlands filled with all the dragons aren't far away, so once he hears the sniper shot he will fly down and pick up the cart that me and Bun will be hauled in, by the way, we'll need a cart, anyways, he'll pick up the cart but not before me and Bun quickly hop out and pull Xavierian's body into the cart so all four of us can get brought out of there before any of his henchponies can get us! Boom! Clean assassination, complete.” She sat back after clapping her hooves.
“Right...” Maverick took another chomp from his apple. “And what if he sends a middlemare instead of showing up himself?” He continuously looked to Hue.
“W-What if he... If he... Sends a middle... Mare... T-Then... Uhhh...” Hue froze in place like an ice sculpture.
“Good, now, does anyone have an actual plan?” Maverick grinned and began at his mashed potatoes.
Bun raised her hoof like she was a filly at school, getting an exhausted nod from Maverick. “Right, well, I imagine what we really need to do is find out where this zebra has his base of operations and then figure out what he looks like, since we have no idea about that, so we should just stake out the meeting location and then follow whoever shows up. Pious can see souls by closing his eyes right? With Ace's ability to track down valuables and my heat vision, we should be able to track them from really far away. While Hue and Felix are much more situated for infiltration, so they can be the ones to scout out the place once we find it. The dragon can be our look-out and back up in the sky if we need him, since yeah, it does make sense for a dragon to be flying around near the badlands.” She then bit her lip gently while taking a look around to read the room of nodding creatures.
“Sounds very reasonable, Bun, good stuff. Anyone have anything to add?” Maverick burped and wiped his lips with the back of his hoof.
Felix mumbled something about him having a question, getting the group’s attention. "R-Right... So, uh, what will me and Hue be doing while you're tracking this middlemare..?"
“Probably securing the perimeter, telling us if there's any gang activity going on nearby, right?” Bun replied to the shimmer.
“Yeah... That sounds good. We'll have ear pieces and stuff right?” He looked to Maverick, who nodded while wiping his mouth with a napkin, his meal done.
“Yeah, yeah, you'll get to have access to the armoury for this one, though be responsible with what you take, cause we have some doozies of weapons in there...“ He leaned in and began whispering as if he was really not supposed to be talking about this, but saying it anyway. “We have a grenade that explodes into more grenades which explode into more grenades. It's called the Scatter-Scatter Splatter and has been deemed a class five explosive, I fucking love it.”
Everyone had a good laugh and got up, all their plates now empty... Apart from Hue's, who still sat stone-still above her full platter of mashed vegetables and hay. “A... Middlemare...” The words fumbled from her lips as she was left alone at the table
“Hue?” Bun went back to the table after putting her plate away for cleaning with everyone else. “Hue come on, Maverick said we have the next two days off.” She shook her from behind.
Hue gasped herself back to life. “BUN! I figured it out, I have a new plan!” She turned around with the glint of youthful excitement in her eyes.
“Hehe... You can tell me about it as we go home, come on.”
“I'm coming! Wait up!” Bun stumbled through the doors of the train car, it being held open helpfully by another passenger for her. “Thank you so much... Ah... Have a good evening.” The pony tipped their hat and went into the train car for a seat, and soon so did Bun, sitting down on her own with a massive sigh of relief.
“Ahh...” She melted back into the cushioned seat, it'd been more than twenty-four hours since she'd been home, and even for a robot she was tuckered out.
Now that she had a sanctioned moment of peace on the train, she thought ahead to her home, she almost forgot about it... She had a whole regular life before these past two days flipped all that around, and now she was going to have to go back and pretend like she still has a regular life.
That was gonna be WEIRD.
She wondered about what Disarray and Goldwing and all her other friends must have thought about where she'd been all this time, realising they've probably been trying to call and text her all day, and she hadn't checked her phone once.
“I'm sorry, guys...” She said preemptively as she retrieved her phone from her saddlebag and saw the notification light blinking at her. “Ughh...” The phone flicked on to life...
""‖‖/^\ [11%]
[20:11]
Sunday, 20 October
| | |
{New Robotics News From MJS} /-\ Twilight sparkle announces changeling based robotic body-modification research.
Click here to learn more.
{44 New Texts From Disarray} /-\ Open
{WyndStreme - New hit Music Video dropped yesterday, watch it now! } /-\ Click here!
| | |
Slide to unlock.
“Fourty four..? Uh...” She tapped into the text messages and began reading through them, each one escalating in worry and frustration at Bun not answering, though surprisingly around halfway through the collection they revealed a new piece of information to her. Apparently some 'government agent' came and told all of her friends that she had been hired on by Twilight to work on the new robot thing, and is currently taking part in a long overnight initiation process. She kept reading until she reached the most recent text of;
Disarray - 19:38: Bun I swear I won't be able to keep G-wing from holding your surprise party much longer, we're all really glad you got this position but REPLY TO ME DAMMIT, and if Twilight's agents are spying on these texts, I ask of you to get BUN ON HER PHONE. AT LEAST ONCE PLEASE DAMN IT. Thanks, much love - Dis
“Yeah yeah...” She began typing out her response.
Bun - 20:16: I am so so so so so so so kinda sorry, I know I should have gotten back to you sooner, but you know how I am... I get tunnel-visioned, and I just focused on this new thing so hard I almost forgot time was passing at all really. I'm coming home now, tell G-wing we can celebrate tomorrow, I'm free for the next two days. See you soon! Much love - Bun
She sighed and closed her phone once more. "Mmm... A party... I could use a party."
The road home was still and peaceful.
Once off the train, she had trodden through the city as the moon steadily rose to its peak, near-midnight as she passed by some faintly reminiscent alleys, her cautious eyes scanning the hollow city for trespassers.
She found nothing but a splatter of day-old blood on the pavement from a mugging that must have happened yesterday... Poor bastard. Bun thought as she hastily moved on.
Despite the ringing of thoughts through her mind, she slept like a foal that night. A benefit of being able to shut yourself down manually.
“Which really helped me sleep, yeah. Fucking Tartarus on fire though, Bun, I thought you were being disassembled so they could see how your insides worked or something crazy like that, you know?” Disarray's ridiculing voice came across the garbled phone call.
“Yeah, yeah, I know, I should have told you quicker, and I already apologised, what more do you want? Hehe...” Bun spoke in her mind, the words being transmitted through bluetooth into her phone and to Disarray on the other end of the call.
“Just get your butt over here, okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, see you there, Dis. Bye!” She hung up and pranced down the streets.
The sun was shining over a gloriously stress-free Monday, Bun had awoken at eight in the morning, later than she had been waking up for years now. The streets were as packed as ever though, the work rush not to fade for another hour or so... Though despite the bustling streets of shoving ponies, she herself was in no rush at all.
She got to casually trot down to the café her and her friends had arranged for.
Minutes later she could hear the bell tingle as she pushed through the door, her eyes darting to a side booth holding the light blue earth pony stallion and the golden tinted pegasus mare in deep conversation. “Hey, guys! I'm here!” Bun smiled and skipped over.
“BUN!” G-wing leapt out of her seat like a tiger and decked Bun to the ground, hugging the ever living shit out of her on the kinda dusty wooden floor of this café.
“A-Agh!! Aha... G... Hehe...” Bun twisted under her friend's passionate grip. “Y-You okay..?” A wide smile slipped its way out of her lips and tried to hide in the corners of her cheeks as she attempted to lift herself and Goldwing up to a sit.
“BUN! I missed you! So freaking much!!! WHERE WERE YOU?!?!” G-wing hopped up and pulled Bun up with her, both mares now on their hooves, then Bun brushed herself off.
“I got carried away with my new job, I'm very sorry, I'll try to keep up with you guys better, I promise.” Bun scooted her butt into the stall and sighed, the cushions of the seats inviting her to fall back and relax while her optimistic eyes bounced between her two friends.
“I told G all of that already, it hasn't exactly helped.” Disarray chimed in between sips of his strawed hot coco. “Tell her about the surprise party, Goldwing.”
Once Goldwing was in her seat once more and heard Disarray's betrayal of best surprise party practices. “DIS!!! You weren't supposed to mention the surprise party to Bun!!!” She gyrated up and down.
“Yes. I'm aware.” He took a long. Painful. Unending slurp from his straw. “But now that I did, you can tell her about the surprise party can't you?”
“That's true... BUN!” She darted her eyes to the pinkish robot. “Okay! So we're throwing you a party! We got drinks, party games, then we're going to watch some movies and just generally spend the whole night messing around. We even bought a DIY robotics kit we're gonna assemble while drunk and see if it works! I can't wait!”
Bun's smile reflected the traces of the morning sun running through the café window. “That all sounds so wonderful, thank you so much, Goldwing, I can't wait to see the others either.”
“Yeah! I know, it'll be awwwwsome! Though, can you please act surprised when we all show up in your apartment? Pweeeeease..? I promised the others we'd get to scare the heebie jeebies out of you.” Goldwing cupped her cheeks in her hooves and flickered her eyelashes.
It gave Bun a good giggle. “Yeah, of course. I'll gladly lose a heebie jeebie or two for you guys.”
Disarray slammed down an empty cup, wiping his lips of chocolate. “Mmn, good. Now that that's settled, how have you been, Bun? How's the new job actually treating you? You haven't said much at all about it over the phone and I'm dying to know what Twilight's got you doing.” He leaned in with engineered curiosity.
“Oh well, actually it's not really Twilight exactly that's given me this job, you see...” Bun heard a subtle click from inside her ear, followed by a repeating beep ringing within her head.
Right... She realised that revealing any secrets about the Shadow Service would cause the chip that had been implanted in her to blow her brains inside out.
And apparently just thinking about it armed the damn thing. “It's nothing special... They just wanted me for my years of experience working with robotics, just trying to develop seamless prosthetics... That kinda thing.” Her face flushes a little as she bit her tongue as if trying to catch the lie. The chip had gone silent once more.
Disarray gave an enduring smile. “Top secret government stuff?”
Bun nodded with a wince.
“That's fine then, whatever you're doing, just stay safe, yeah?”
“Yeah... Thanks, Dis.”
DING! Goldwing jumped, her wing wrapping around her side to grab the phone out of her bag. “Oooo! I got the text... They're done preparing for the surprise party!”
“Awesome! Shall we head out then?” Bun hopped out of the booth.
Her two friends nodded and came out of the café with her, chatting all the way down the now resting streets, all the way up to the apartment where her new-job celebration would be held.
For the next two days she was going to get to relax, have fun with her friends and be normal again... Well, as normal as she normally would be. Which isn't that normal to be fair. But regardless, she missed this.
She stepped through the door and did her best to act surprised.
