join Jacob D. Falcon for a new story with some odd similarities to stories that are similar
hello, my name is Jacob D. Falcon and this is a tale of randomness in a ponies plane of reality... join me in the adventure of the day! plus a semi-original concept, no cons here. Just bullets and blades also boobs ...lots of ponies with boobs. DISCLAIMER: I do not own kingdom hearts or the fate/ franchise or My Little Pony Friendship is Magic just how I use their ideas.
I was walking home from my mom's bar when it happened...at the moment I was goofing around, acting dumb you know like every 18-year-old and I bumped into a really big guy who was about 6'3" he grabbed me and yelled "Hey punk! Watch where you're going or else!" Now I'm not a much of a fighter but knew how to and I also had a gun in my pocket that's for show (it's painted black but it's still a plastic water gun) so in a moment of pure unadulterated stupidity, I said...
" 'else what you limp dick bitch, you'll call your boyfriend to knock me out?" I guess this is a good time to introduce myself: my name is Jacob D. Falcon. I'm about 5'10" have curly as fuck silver-ish blond hair. pale skin (I don't go outside often) brown eyes and in my own words, and most agree, 'a dick' but back to the big guy... naming him Fred it's a little bit less to say. His face is red and puffy and My stupidity continues.
"Like you can talk you fat prick."...man, he is asking for this...
"Thank you, it's too bad I can't say the same about you. Though your boyfriend must be glad yours is tiny, makes it easier on him." now if I wasn't busy being a prick, this next part might have not happened. Fred pulled out his (real) gun put it on my forehead and pulled the trigger... at least I got the last laugh, right? Well... not quite what happens next was something I wasn't expecting, When the bullet penetrated my skull instead of my brain matter splattering on to the asphalt, The bullet turned in to a mini black hole or something similar and pulled me in, The last words I heard were.
"See you in hell."... you're a prick, Fred.
Pain and fear. These were one of many things I felt when I opened my eyes. it was dark, was it because it was nighttime? Nope, I look up. Trees, I look around lots of trees. The hooting of the owls, rustling of leaves and snapping of twigs. And the howls of wolfs. it's understandable to be feeling fear. Right now my head was killing me, but then I remembered Fred. I got up and yelled.
"You're a goddamned prick Fred, a small one too!" Then I realized something important, "I'm...dead..." I muttered. "But I don't feel dead in fact I feel better than ever." Then more fear showed up as I got surrounded by Timber-wolves, A few manticores, And some chimera. As all of them prepared to pounce on me, A woman jumped in and scared them away by waving a burning stick at them. As I got a good look at her (and boy howdy, did I), she looked human but more equine in nature, like a tail, fur, and a small muzzle. But as she stood on her two hooves? she has the figure of a slender human, has 5 fingers and D cup breast...I have absolutely no idea how I know that...moving on! She also has an accent I couldn't quite place as she asked me.
"Are you okay? This is not a good place to stay."
"I'm okay... And I'm not staying here for long. Anyway, I think we started on the wrong fo- er hoof. my name is Jacob D. Falcon your's?" "It's Zecora and let's talk at my home it's far too dangerous to talk in the forest at night." she suggested as she started to walk away. "yeah let's go..." I got up and followed her.
After a little bit, she spoke again. "We walked for a bit, but we haven't talked we should fix that as I've said my name is Zecora." I nod "I'm Jacob D. Falcon, but most call me Jacob or Falcon whichever you prefer."I said not truly caring what she called me
"It's nice to meet you. Perhaps you can tell me what you are? You don't look like you are from around here." she said, I nodded and sat down on a convenient log. "I'm human, and just so you don't need to ask I'm 18 and you're a zebra, right? that's cool." she smiled blushing slightly "Thank you." I smiled back "your welcome."
As I stood up to go to sleep on that cot she provided me with I Asked: "Where's Ponyville?" I'm a brony so I knew Ponyville was close by. and before you say 'Then how come you didn't know who Zecora was?' because of anthropomorphism. That's why. "It's about a 10-minute walk west of here. Why?" she asks curiously. "Well if I'm going to be leaving tomorrow morning might as well ask right where to go. Good night Zecora." I said as I laid down on the cot and fell asleep. "good night." she said as she went to sleep.
This is just fucking perfect I might be dead got teleported to the Everfree forest and got stuck with a zebra that makes mini-me want to escape the doghouse...*sigh* I just realized that racism might be a thing. "I need some air...and a god-damned punching bag." I said as I got up and exited Zecora's house. This place is a hell of a lot creepier than on the show I can tell you that much...I mean come on, I get this is THE Forest of Supposed Evil but come on this is a just bit too much. You could use a knife to cut this shit. I then felt my 'trusty' water gun in my pocket." Holy jumping jalapenos on a stick. I still have this?" I grabbed it and pulled it out of my pocket... it's heavier than before...and made metal...holy shit I'm holding an instrument of death."I am surprisingly okay with this, whatever I am way too tired for this shit. I'm going to bed." So I holstered my 'new' gun and walked into the hut and straight into my sleeping bag. Life is going to be strange from now on that's for damn sure. I closed my eyes and what I was met with was odd, to say the least.
"...Why the fuck am I in Kingdom Hearts?" it's true black everything, glowing stained glass at my feet, and in front of me is 7 stands instead of 3. On each stand are from left to right: a kick-ass pair of dual cutlasses , a lance dual pistols, a bad-ass motorcycle, a magical looking ring, something that I nearly fainted at the sight of, HB from AC:BF and last but not least something I don't think I can even pick up a giant battleax . now if I'm dreaming and I don't get at least 1 of these weapons to kill Fred with I will-, I really need that punching bag and quick. "from least to greatest chose your class" then the rest of the D.T.H. happened except the fight with the giant heartless.
Well, that just happened... and I'm not drunk enough for this shit.
As I opened my eyes I felt something different about me...like there's this H.U.D around me...I say H.U.D but it's more like just a health bar and that karma meter from Infamous. But enough about that time to get that punching bag. In the middle of the night...Yeah, that's not happening so I'm just going to go violence a tree real quick. Random quota met! So I got most of the anger of my situation out, so I decided to test some things out like 'Running Speed', 'Jump Height', 'Standing Long Jumps', and also tried to summon a Keyblade, oh come on don't look at me like that. I know you've tried it at least once when you've had a Kingdom Hearts dream.
Well, I found out 3 things from my tests. One, I'm a sprinter, not an endurance runner. Two, the Mario Brothers is absolute bull. Three, still no keyblade. Zecora might get up soon so I better get back. As I was thinking this I was hitting a tree with a stick... I win I guess.
"Anyway, I think that's enough testing for now. Gotta head back to Zecora's hut before she wakes up and gets worried." I said as I started my trek back to the hut. 'Though I kinda wonder how the mane 6 will react to an omnivorous species suddenly appearing outta nowhere' as I walked to the hut I saw the kind zebra waiting outside, I moved a bit faster while calling out. " hey! What are you doing awake? The sun's not up yet-" I asked as I looked up, I realize something. "or is it? I mean I can't really tell with the trees in the way"
I have seemed to forget that I was in the Everfree. I mean really, only rainforests should have leaves this thick. Oh, Zecora's talking I should pay attention. "The sun's been up for a while now, I was worried about you, you were gone when I woke up." I scratch the back of my head while looking away, thinking about how to explain this to her.
"Well you see I had some pent-up anger toward a certain someone, and well I didn't want that to affect the first impression the town will have on me." I look back at her. "The mind is a fickle thing it will not be open to strange things right off the back." Well, psychology aside I still have to give her something to think on. "I think honesty would be best in any situation, so it's best to get it done, right?"
I must have said something right because she's smiling at me and turns to a trail on her left "You must hike that way for the place you seek." She looks back to me."Ponyville is not as shallow as you think." She starts to walk down the path she points out earlier."Just beware of the one of pink."
I look at her weirdly "pink?" I mean yeah I don't like the color but that seems a bit extreme. I shake my head and follow her down the path. I get bored quickly so I said "so what do you think of the townspeople." she looked at me strangely "what?"
"don't you mean Townsponies?" she asked me still making the face. I scoff and say "I bet more than just ponies live there so I'm including all species in that statement." her expression changes to a thoughtful one. She stops with the 'my life's a lie' look on her face.
"well enough about that, let's continue on our way, Zecora." I said starting to get nervous about the way those trees look. after a few minutes, the leaves get less dense and the trail gets smoother. Zecora jogs ahead of me and stops me.
"Welcome to Ponyville!" She smiled and walks further down the trail to the bridge connecting the road to the town.
'Well I can safely say I didn't expect this' I thought inside the cage of purpleness. I should probably explain what happened before now. It all started when I walked into town, the sun was shining. the little ponies were playing, and a rainbow flash decided I need a bad time. but here are the details if you want that.
"Welcome to Ponyville!" Zecora smiled and walked across the bridge connecting the road to the town. 'Well this will be an adventure' as I cross the bridge, I look around everything is just full of color even that silent movie theatre. I stop at a crosswalk and look around I see the CMC and their sisters running around, the CMC looks to be about 14-16 years old. While 3 of the mane 6 looks to be 20-something. Applebloom wares that pink bow as a holder for a small ponytail. (the irony is not lost on me) She also wears a yellow-green t-shirt with blue overalls. next to her is Applejack wearing the EG outfit. next to them was Sweetie Belle and Rarity as I observe them I see something interesting 'they don't have horns? how do they tell if they're unicorns then?' and then Scootaloo with Rainbow Dash their wings flapping methodically trying to get Scootaloo in the air.
"Well isn't that a thing?" I said not understanding what was about to happen. this next part's a bit confusing, but please try and follow along. first I turn around about to go and find either the library or the friendship castle then I trip on a suspiciously placed banana peel, the next two things that happen is me falling, but while falling I throw a ball? I couldn't tell with the sun in my eyes. The ball lands on a ramp and goes down it, it drops onto a mint-green unicorn who throws the ball away in anger. The ball hits a lamppost and bounces off it. next, it does a rimshot off a drumset and lands directly on a shy pegasus and the ball pops, causing the yellow pony to jump onto a pink one. the pink one revs like a racecar and speeds off into the playing CMC somehow forming a ball made of pony that then crashes into one Twilight Sparkle... and somehow after this ridiculous display. I was the "reincarnated spirit of chaos" because I laughed at the scene I caused. Well, this was pre-alicorn twilight so the EoH(Elements of Harmony) were still very much active. so, in the end, I got to taste the rainbow... it wasn't very tasty.
Pov third person
As the mane 6 power down, the "new discord" was sealed in stone through the expression it made wasn't one of shock it was one of amusement and disappointment. as twilight got up she spoke to the baby dragon next to her.
"Spike take a letter!" this is the letter as written by Spike the dragon:
Dear Princess Celestia, We have faced a new enemy to Equestira, we believe it to be a new Discord since the one we know has been reformed. with quick response to a problem it caused, we used the elements on it to seal it way until you decide what to do with it.
Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.
with a quick bout of green flame, the letter was off and the path was set... let's see what happens next.
"...Ok, what the fuck just happened?" I asked still processing the events of the last chapter. Wait, the last chapter? Where did that come from? "...and now I'm losing it! Just perfect. Just what I needed! hello mother, father this is your son on mary-ja-wanna and I got high af before I fell down and became a stoner! You would be fucking proud!" I ranted into the nothingness that comes with being a statue. As I pouted became Batman, I failed to notice that there was some color next to me.
"Well if you wanted to come off as the new spirit of chaos then you did wonderfully!" said a voice too cheerful for my current mood. looking toward it I see Princess Luna?... well this wasn't part of the script.
"Would it be rude to say I was expecting someone else?" I asked trying not to anger the beautiful mare next to me. She just laughed.
"Only if you were thinking of the sun and praising it...though what are you? I'm afraid I never met something like you." She tilted her head making a part of her flowing mane to go in front of her face, it was adorable. After regaining my thoughts from the display I decided to make a bad joke.
"Praise the sun? Pssh that's so 2013. I praise the moon and all the glory it brings." While getting on my knees I said "PRAISE THE MOON! FOR THEY HAVE SUGER COOKIES!" Luna gasps.
"How did you know that? I have told no one about them." She said with a suspicious frown. I was about to respond when she burst out laughing, I join in soon after.
"Haha...ah~ A good laugh in the night is always enjoyable but on to the question you asked me." I stood up then made a small bow. "The name's Jacob D. Falcon, or Falcon if you prefer." I straightened up my clothes "And I'm a human being. You won't have any recollection to my kind because they are not on this planet, or dimension for that matter." I bring my hands up for the dramatic reveal. "I come in peace and with High Stone expectations."
She stares blankly at me. "You're joking, right?" I shake my head. "To be perfectly honest being a chaos spirit would make more sense then what you say is the truth." I shrug and sit down as a chair appears under me.
"While that may be true, I don't like lies so I prefer not to make them. also I'm not chaos incarnate I literally just came down from a position of balance." I finished with a smirk. "or in other words, I tripped and fell down causing an improbable chain reaction that caused a hilarious chain of events that ended with me becoming a statue." I made a cat out of some mist and pretended to pet it. "So tell Discord to take his job back because I want to come down soon."
"So, it's been a while." I stated blandly as I turned the calendar towards her. The calendar in question having many red x's upon it's grided face.
"What can I say? I'm a busy mare." She stated, sounding almost bored with the response, as she rolled her eyes.
"Well Luna, I hope one of those reasons we're convincing your xenophobic ponies that I'm not the new lord of chaos." I said irritated that I've spent the last 4 weeks in a dark abyss with no one but myself to talk to... I'm lonely okay? sure having the beautiful moon princess to look at every few days helps me from losing my mind, but I do need other beings to talk to. Luna sighed and sat down on a recliner that was there. She grabbed a teacup from nowhere and sipped it before speaking.
"I have good news and bad news, I suppose." She swirled her teacup before taking another sip. Setting it down on the table, she then took two papers, one blue the other red. "these are your choices. The blue paper contains the easier route to freedom, and the red paper contains the harsher path."...this seems familiar for some reason.
"The blue path is a series of gauntlet trails used to prove innocence and intent."... "and the red path is a spell used to change your species and sometimes gender, what you would be turned into is a random sentient species on Equis."...
"Luna both of those choices suck." I stated bluntly showing just how much I didn't like them. She nods in agreement, sighing at the choices I respond with this: "Okay out of these horrible choices i choose..."
"Luna both of those choices suck," I stated bluntly showing just how much I didn't like them. She nods in agreement, sighing at the choices I respond with this: "Okay out of these horrible choices I choose..." I stop and really thought about it. On one hand, if I chose the blue path I'll still be Human, and I might show these ponies that xenophobia is bullshit. On the other hand, if I chose the red path, I might be able to use magic and adjust better to this new world...but I would be proving their xenophobic views are right...also I might pull a Doctor and become female, and that has it's own slew of problems: I would have to rediscover how my 'parts' work, relearn how to walk. Then there are all the assholes that would only want me for my hypothetically sexy body, and no I know what your thinking. I'm only saying it might happen because every woman in this world is drop dead gorgeous- Ya know what.
"Fuck it, it would be faster if you change my species, it would give your ponies less to adjust to." I said confirming my choice. Luna seemed surprised at my choice, whether it was my choice or my use of language, I don't care to know. Before she speaks she raises her eyebrow.
"I'm surprised you'd give up your species so easily, I know that I would have a hard time doing so...Especially with the chance of a gender change." I shrugged and sat down on a recliner. I sighed and gave a frown
"Well, it's not like the sky is falling or anything." my frown turns it a deadpan. "I already believe in magic, I've broken down about the definite possibility, I'll never see my family again, and it's not like my species has a use here...unless you need a chubby omnivore that can live off certain meat substitutes." Seeing her cringe was answer enough.
"So in short, there are nothing but benefits for me to go with this spell...Unless you count a hypothetical gender change as a hindrance, but honestly I'd rather be a girl then be persecuted for something I was born as." I said stating my final reasons for my decision.
She was silent as she thought about my reasons, after a bit of time, she stood up and said 'I'll be back' then she was gone.
"...maybe I should have asked for a magic theory book to kill the time."
4 Days Later
So the thing about being suspended in stone is that you get a lot a time to think. Sometimes this is a good thing because you can plan out what you're going to do next, but more often than not, you just get more and more anxious as time goes on. Thankfully it was more of the former than the latter, and thanks to that I was able to find my...Power? Yeah, I'll call it that for now.
It turns out that thanks to being from a world of imagination and innovation help in a world with magic. with that ability to imagine how you want something to work and guiding the magic in the direction you want it to go in, nearly anything is possible. For example, let's say you want to do something as basic as levitation. first, you would have to find the method you want to do it with, some think of it as making the object's personal gravity invert itself causing it to float. others think of it as grabbing an object with an invisible hand.
With one of those images in mind you'd then have to focus on either Mana or Magic, and yes there is a difference. Mana is natural energy found in all things, you could call it spiritual things like ki, chi, and chakra. the more intuned with Mana you are the more connected to nature you are. also, it makes things like natural healing and your five senses quicker and better.
However Magic is the combination of Mana, Imagination, and Willpower. This allows things like the stuff in Harry Potter. For more examples: Elemental magic like Fire and Wind, Transformation magic like the spell that's going to be used on me, and much more.
...Wait, one more thing. I just remembered that humans can use magic in this world... Well, we could evolve to do so we don't have the most important thing to do magic with, a Mana Pool. this is described as a small organ that is (in all other creatures besides unicorn ponies which is in their horns) above the heart that filter mana in and out of the body. This is done through Mana currents in the body A.K.A. Mana Vains. unlike normal veins, these can change location in the body depending on species. like in a dragon they're located in the wings, throat, and eyes.
Now enough about that, I got to tell you what's happening now. I'm still in my statue, which was named "Reimagined Choas", being transported to the Crystal Empire. This is being done to test if I'm evil or not. You know, before they release me again. now thanks to the new understanding of magic I have I was able to somehow 'see' what's going on outside of my cage.
The Mane Six have gathered around and talked about 'how realizing the new god of chaos was a bad idea.' and all that jazz. Honestly, I just tuned them out while 'playing' music in my head
So after that, we got to the center of the Empire and the signal was given to release me. After the Rainbow of Doom was gone I had collapsed onto my knees and panted, getting fresh air into my lungs, Then shifted into a kneel in front of the princesses. clearing my throat and standing up, I did a half bow and sat down on a stool. After all that Princess Luna started them off.
"Introduce yourself, creature, This is formalities only, so please no nicknames."...buzzkill
"Jacob D. Falcon. The First and The Last human on this planet, and a victim to a series of unfortunate events." Dramatic? yes. necessary? no. Did it because I felt like it? Bingo.
"Jacob D. Falcon, You have been charged with reckless endangerment of several Ponies. How do you Plead?"Celestia was the one to say that...and now, this is a court case?
"Innocent." They gave me a look to explain myself. "I Tripped and fell, starting a chain reaction. so if anything the rock that tripped me is the guilty one." Both of them nodded. but then turned serious.
"Be that as it may, You still must pay for the damages wrought to the ponies and since your not a citizen of Equestria, and a foreign creature that may or may not be dangerous. We have given you two choices..." they explain the choices again, then asked me what I'll choose...This is it, after this, there is no turning back.
"I chose the Red Path." Many ponies gasped at my choice, they probably thought I'd choose blue.
"Typical of a Monkey to chose the quickest path to escape consequences." ...would I get arrested for Assaulting the prick who said that?
"Okay who said that?" I asked loudly, The crowd parted for this guy whom just screamed 'i'm a self-entitled prick, Bow before me!'
"It was I, Prince Blueblood, who said that Ape" Said the prick Blueblood. I smirked at the opportunity brought before me.
"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear you, did you say 'Prince BlueBalls?' because that would be a shame for you." A moment of pure silence passed then everyone including the princesses laughed uproariously. And BlueBalls turned into RedBalls.
So after messing with Blueballsblood, I seemed to have gained some liking in the crowd, though some of the nobles were demanding that the princesses got it over with. so after regaining control of the area(and themselves), they started to cast the spell. their yellow and sky-blue magic mix and made a ball of light green, this ball then peeled itself into a long ribbon which swirled around me; cocooning me.
To describe how it felt you have to think about the last time you've stubbed your toe. it wasn't pleasant but it wasn't unbearable...at first, that is. that discomfort soon became like a Charly horse that constricts across your body. well to me this kept getting worse and worse for hours but I was told after that it was only 2 minutes. before I passed out from the pain, I saw my hands and arms had black fur on them and I think had a muzzle.
3 days later
A beam of sunlight shining into my eyes woke me up, I turned my head an tried to go back to sleep because sleep is nice but someone clearing their throat to let me know that I had to open my eyes or face the consequences(how some convey that in a cough still alludes me to this day). After groaning I lifted my head and open my eyes. Before me was Princess Luna, who looked worried and annoyed at me. Next to her was Twilight Sparkle, who looked either sad or guilty. Why I have no idea. Across from where I slept was a mirror that was showing me, my new appearance. I got to say I could have gotten worse, I could only see the upper part of my chest but it was enough to tell me I was still male. The black fur making me look more buff than I probably was. I seemed to be a bit taller I was now 6' even. My hair was now a deep red with light blue highlights that went down to my shoulders...I'll cut it later. The biggest thing, after my new species that is, was that I was no longer fat, now I'm skinny. Now for the biggest thing: What I was, I am now a black furred wolf with eyes that reflect the light well making it seem like liquid gold. there are strips of gray around my eyes, but it mixes well with the black making it seem like a lighter shade of black instead of an abrupt transition into a pure gray. I look at them and say.
"So I'm no fox, but I think I look good. What about you?"
"So I'm no fox, but I think I look good. What about you?" SMACK One facepalm courtesy of Twilight was enough to get Luna to giggle a little at the joke. I smirk a little at the reactions and look to Twilight.
"I believe this is the first time we talked face to face, Miss...?" Yes, I know her name already, but I'm trying to be polite...no matter how hard that may be. She straightened her posture and cleared her throat.
"My name is Twilight Sparkle, the Element of Magic and protege of Princess Celestia, you may call me Twilight." '...what's with the holier-than-thou tone?' I thought while deadpanning at her.
"Okay," I said clearing my throat and sat up straighter. "as I said before my name is Jacob D. Falcon, a victim of an unfortunate series of events, ...and former human I suppose..." I trail off a little before snapping back into focus. "anyway I wanted to apologize for my rude entrance into...Ponyville, was it?" She nodded and almost cut me off to say something, but I continued.
"I assume you wish to ask me questions pertaining to who I was." She nods again, looking puzzled as to how I guessed that. I ignored that and gestured for her to start asking questions. She magics in a list to read from and a quill to record my responses.
"First question: Do you like Ponies?" ...is this a joke? like really, you're going to ask this question now? "...Ok, Twilight, I'm going to be blunt with you. I don't have a fair opinion for ponies as a whole, for one: You stoned me for no other reason than "hey it's something new it must be evil"! Then you release me and basically say "Buck you" and give me two opinions that result in either death or randomly generated bull fuckery because I'll have to learn how to deal with Ya Know, new everything. and then one prick insults me for no reason other then what I was BORN as..." She flinches a little every time I finish a sentence. I take a deep breath and continue."...so at the moment my opinion is not very high."
"What about hobbies?" ok, I can answer this one...though something about this feels like something I'll be bugged about later.
"I enjoy playing and listening to music, playing video games and...cooking." I finish with a smile.
That's all for now, I'll be back later...bye." she said as she left, most of the questions were like the one she asked after that first one, so like a job interview: hobbies, any crimes I might have committed... which I guess I have something to put there now. and much of the same. Luna asked some questions, but they were more related to what video games were like. she seemed interested in halo...Too bad she'll never get to play it.
I look around, Luna left a while ago, after getting an idea from something I said. the room was empty besides a bed and that awful lemon smell hospitals have... I guess that I'll have to sleep for now.
Name: Jacob D. Falcon: Pre-Spell Species: Dude I'm Human! you know this Hight: five foot eleven Age: 18. DoB: April 27, 2000. Hair color: Silverish blonde. Eye color: Brown. Personality: self-proclaimed Asshole others say I'm a good person but I don't see it. Bio: I lived in the middle of a border town in America, it was peaceful, little to no crime and had everything important: a shop, a pub, and a small engine repair. The shop was on the verge of closing down when I was shot by Fred. my mother owned the local pub and a family friend owned a small repair shop for minor engine problems. I was a bit chunky because of the fact I'm lazy. I was ok with the guitar and loved to draw in my free time, I also liked to cook. I had only 7 friends, but that was fine... I hope they're okay...
Name: Fred Hight: 6' 3" Species: Assuming Human Age: fuck if I know DoB: see the last field Hair color: Black Eye color: blue Personality: Fucking Prick Bio: Nothing is known other than he's a fucking prick.
Name: Zecora Hight: 5 feet 4 inches Species: Zebra Age: do I look like I have a death wish? Cup size: D DoB: I didn't ask yet Hair color: white and black Eye color: blue Personality: Nice, she has to be if she's a healer Bio: Don't know her history
Name: Cutie Mark Crusaders (Sweetie bell, Applebloom, Scootaloo) Hight: 4' 3", 4' 5", 4' 4". Species: Unicorn Pony, Earth Pony, Pegasus Pony. Age: do I look like I have a death wish? but I'll assume 15-ish all around Cup size: didn't look long enough to know, nor do I want to DoB: I don't know. Hair color: Pink and purple, Red, Purple. Eye color: Green, orange, purple. Personality: didn't talk to them so I don't know Bio: Don't know, I do just to lazy to explain.
You know what from now on it's just going to be things I Do know.
Name: Applejack, can I call her Aj? Hight: five foot seven Species: Earth Pony Cup size: D? looks bigger but I wasn't looking long enough to be sure. Hair color: Blonde Eye color: Green
Name: Rarity, I didn't like her in the show let's see if she's better here. Hight: five foot five but she had heels on so five three. Species: Unicorn Pony Cup size: E? how the fuck does she Stand in heels? Hair color: purple. Eye color: same as her eyes.
Name: Rainbow Dash, nicknamed her Skittles in my mind. Hight: five foot five and she's not wearing heels, neat. Species: Pegasus Pony Cup size: Double D? well at least she's not flat like everyone thinks. Hair color: Skittles. Eye color: purplish-red? sorry, I'm not good with color names.
Name: Princess Luna Hight: five foot nine Species: Alicorn Cup Size: H Hair Color: blue, black, and the night Eye Color: Blue Personality: Best princess
Name: Princess Celestia Hight: five foot eleven Species: Alicorn Cup Size: H Hair Color: soft rainbow Eye Color: pink
Name: BlueBallsBlood. Hight: five foot ten Species: Unicorn Cup Size: he wishes Hair Color: blonde Eye Color: blue Personality: Dick
Name: Twilight Sparkle Hight: five foot four Species: Unicorn Cup Size: C Hair Color: purple with lighter purple highlights Eye Color: purple Personality: Bookworm
Name: Jacob D. Falcon (Post-Spell) Age: still 18 Hight: six foot even Species: Black Furred Wolf Hair Color: Dark Red with blue streaks Eye Color: Golden Personality: slightly less of a dick then I was...I think. Bio: hasn't been long enough to even change this
I like to sleep, it's just the best way to get away from everything. don't like your class lecture well sleep has you covered. And yes that was sarcasm, stay in school kids you're going to need it. anyways, back to topic. I love to sleep, it lets you recharge after your day of doing who knows what, it lets your imagination go wild to create you a dream, or if you're one of those lucid types, you can do whatever you want. now this dream is strange for me, it's showing me flying and flinging around lightning...can I do that? Please tell me I can do that! That would be epic. -ep 'wait what?' -eep oh yeah, I'm sleeping, and I'm about to wake up for the day to come. beep 'Well as a wise man once said Allons-y' with that thought I opened my eye to pain, a pain so hurtful that I swore to slap Celestia the next time I saw her. I'll slap her to the moon, I fucking swear it.
After adjusting to the light of day, I sat up and looked around the room again to find where that accursed beeping came from, looking to my right there it was on the nightstand, the true demon of hell: The alarm clock, I punched the snooze button and almost threw it out the window, I stopped and just looked. The view is amazing, the blues of the sky and water bodies playing around with the dark brown and light green of the land...it makes you wonder why there's strife in this world I'm on. Oh well, time to get on with the day.
knock, knock "Hello, are you awake Mr. Falcon?" Said a voice... I guess the door is to thick to identify gender.
"Yes I am, you can come in if you want to." The door opens as I replaced the alarm clock on the stand and got comfortable on the hospital cot. In came a mare that looked like she came out of someone's wet dream. Her legs were long and slender almost seeming to drive your attention to her child-bearing hips that made her thin torso curve in just the right way, and will she may not be the bustiest girl I've seen since I came here to Equestria, she had a decent C that just wouldn't quit. and her face was framed by her almost pink hair. she had a sexy smirk that did NOT belong on a health-care professional.
'this is how I die... I have seen all I need to in this world' I thought as I hear the bells of heaven chime my name.
"I know I have a pretty face, but I need you to focus" She giggles as a clipboard made it's way to her hand... I'm sorry what?
"Oh, sorry I'm just not used to the beauty of this world yet." I said as her cyan coat reddens. I guess she hasn't heard that one yet. "But please, go on, no offense to you but I'd prefer to get out of here as soon as possible." She giggles again as she nods. flipping a few pages and grabbing a quill from somewhere, she asks some basic medical questions, like do I have any allergies and what not.
After a bit of back and forth, she tells me something interesting. "You have a mana pool, but there's something different about it..." she trails off while tilting her head a little not quite knowing how to tell me.
"How so?" I ask hoping to all hell that I'm not about to get some OP bullshit like. Oh, you got the big one that allows you to rip out you're heart and use it like a grenade and you won't die because of regeneration.
"While it's bigger," goddamn it. "it seems as if it will only generate your natural elements and nothing else." Wait, what? that wasn't in my magic theory book. "Oh, seeing as you're from another world you probably don't know the recent developments in magic."
I chuckle "You'd be right about that..." As I trailed off I was thinking about this new development. 'Luna you and I are going to have a very long talk after this.'
"While for the most part all of our magic theory books are correct they don't explain about a person's natural inclination to certain elements, for example, fire, water, earth, wind, light, darkness, evil, etc. 'dark magic' is a misnomer for evil magic. darkness magic is also known as illusion magic and light magic is also known as medical magic. the rest is exactly as they sound." while this is useful to know what does this have to do with me? "we did a scan on your magic pool and found that you're more attuned to wind and lightning magic." Ok not going to lie, that's badass. "we also did a full body scan and found you have wings..." This is awesome! best day- "But we don't know how to open them." and this day just blue-balled me.
So, in the span of maybe 2 weeks, I got shot in the face, saved by a fictional character, became a stoner, became friends with one of the three rulers of a fictional world, got my species changed, learned I can do magic with proper instruction. I'd say that's productive.
"Get off your lazy plot and do SOMETHING." However, I believe that others don't think so. The one yelling at me to get off my ass and stop being lazy is Rainbow Dash, Chief weather manager, and Element of Loyalty, and also the self-proclaimed fastest flyer of Equestria.
"I thought you had wings? any flyer would hate to be on the ground as long as you have." She lectured me on how uncool I was. Okay, one of these days I'm going to run circles around you and you'll be proud, but I guess for now I'll explain why I'm being uncool.
"Okay Dash better question: how do you summon your wings?" I ask pointing to the appendages on her back. "Because whilst doing nothing on my lazy plot, I was looking for some kind of feeling so I can pop them out...to no avail though."
"What does flying mean to you?" She asked flatly. I stare at her...is she going to clarify or is that the question? does not seem like she will so I'll just say what I think. "Breaking free of my limitations."
Fwoop
...Really, mate? Fucking really?
"That's almost insultingly easy..." I muttered pissed at my inability to think of that.
"The hard part is actually using them." Dash said as she hovers in front of me. I move my wings to get used to the feeling and my range of motion. Just so you know the wings are black with red tips on the feathers. On one of my test flaps, I shoot up and impale my head into the ceiling. I would ask for Rainbow's help but she's too busy laughing her plot off
"...this is why I go to therapy." I jokingly mutter as I fall back down onto the couch I was on. She was about to cuss me out to do something again, but I raised a finger and told her that I just 'did something' so her argument was invalid. She turned red and flew off back to her napping spot.
The laws of physics are bullshit, so is magic, and so is biology. Ponies have made those things their bitch and the bitch must be in a horrible heat with all the fucking they're doing. To explain a little, my wings that I just figured out how to use are way too small to generate enough lift to propel me into the air and keep me suspended in the freefall we call flying. However thanks to magic fucking their bitch I can lift off and stay in the air in a straight line...For the reason of magic can't teach you how to fly, it's either crash or do...hopefully the latter.
"Now all you got to do is keep your wings steady as you glide!" Skittles said as she evenly flattens her wings outwards, causing her to slow down and start to lose altitude slowly.
"Seems simple enough." I tilt my wings slightly downwards and relish in the warm summer air heating my fur... My fur, never thought I would say that. and I never thought I'd fly, being born as a ground-bound person kinda puts things in perspective. Life will always be a clusterfuck and it's up to us as people to make that cluster make sense. I look down and see that I should probably get ready to land.
"Now for a bit of flare." as my paws hit the ground I roll bleeding off momentum and popping back up on my 'feet'. I turn back to Rainbow and held out my hand. "Thanks for the lesson Dash. It will be a while, but you'll make a flyer out of me yet."
"Well, thanks for actually paying attention. I know that someday you'll be as good as someone born with wings!" she stated as she shook my hand. She looked up at the sky and then back down to the blue watch she has for some reason. She clicks her tongue and leaves while saying she had something to do... most likely her job.
"...Now what?" I ask myself as I'm suddenly with nothing to do. The only reason why Dash could help me, is because she's not busy until someone screws something up with the weather. Twilight is busy with some magical experiment so I'm not going anywhere near that. Fluttershy is busy with her animals. I have no fashion sense so Rarity's out. Applejack has a farm to run...might see if she has things that I can do for work later, but I'm going to hang out with Spike if I can. Little dude needs some more guy friends.
With that in mind, I walk to Rarity's place. knowing that he'll either be there or back at Twilight's. As I walk, I wave hello to the people around town. Some wave back others are too absorbed in their work to pay me any mind. As I walk by Sugarcube corner I remember that I haven't had any snacks from here yet... I must rectify that. changing my quest-log I walk in and struck a pose.
"Pinkie, I hath came for a treat most sweet, have thee have what I seek?" I said in the most urgent manner. Perking up she throws on a Jesters hat and animatedly talks with her hands.
"Oh, we do indeed weary traveler, please have a look at our wares." She hands me a menu. "I guarantee thee of the quality of mine sweets." I take a quick scan of the menu. Oh~ they have milkshakes and strawberry syrup.
"I shall have a shake of milk with strawberry syrup as a topping if thee do not mind." I said finishing my order.
"That will be fine, thee owe 3 bits for thy order." I give the mare the money and she smiles and bounces off. I smile at the dumbfounded expressions on the other customers. Ye Ol' English is still the best way to screw with people, even if you don't know much of it. I sit down on the stool and waited for my milkshake.
"Your milkshake." Pinkie said as she placed it down on the counter while braking character.
"Thanks, Pinkie, you got anything for Spike? I'm going to be looking for him after this." I state as I slurp on my shake. She put a finger on her temple while humming in thought. She shakes her head and shrugs. I nod and she bounces off to do her job.
I finish my shake with a smile and leave a bit on the counter before leaving Sugarcube Corner.
I left Sugarcube Corner after my shake ran empty, I bought a muffin so I could at least be polite if Spike or Rarity haven't eaten. I look around, the place is almost baren if not for the market salesmen. Now, normally I would just walk and mingle a little, but there's no one around who don't want my bits.
"Time for a view change" I grin mischievously putting the muffin into a messenger bag I got from Twilight. Then I start climbing the wall. Thanks to the fact that I know how to glide and land safely I'll have some fun with free-running. Sprinting towards the edge of the building's roof, I jump and front flip into a glide, both boosting my speed and maximum hight. I roll on to the new roof and pop back up to continue running. I repeat this process a couple of times before adding some pole jumps when I got to the town square. grabbing onto the spire jutting out of the roof of town hall I spin 76 degrees left and let my momentum push me into a glide onto the next building. Dropping then rolling back into a run, I jump off the edge of the house I was on and slid down the drainage pipe. Planting both feet on the ground I turn and left the ally. Lo' and behold there it is: Rarity's boutique and abode.
I walk up to the door, knock, then enter.
"Spike! Put the radish in the blender with the thread and then set it on fire."...nope. Nope. NOPE! I slam the door shut after dodging a spool of string and pulled Spike out of the madness I just witnessed. I then hand the drake the muffin I got for him and asked what the hell just happened.
"I don't know I-I just asked Sweetie if she needed help with what she was doing and one thing lead to another and somehow a radish got involved w--" I shoved the muffin into his mouth and I breathed in slowly hoping he got the point. thankfully he did and he took a deep breath after swallowing the bit of muffin in his mouth.
"Thanks, I needed that..." I nodded and spike explained that Sweetie wanted to make a shirt for a club thing at school... I zoned out the rest but basically, CMC luck strikes again.
"... I will never look at a radish the same way again." Spike shivered as he recalled what that vegetable did in the hands of Sweetie Belle.
"I don't blame you Spike that sounded horrible." I winced as I walked away from Rarity's clothes store and home. "But now you can hang with me as we do some guy things." I said as I picked up a long stick from the ground.
"Oh yeah, what guy things?"...I know Spike's a guy and all but being a kid dragon certainly helps being cute when tilting your head. I shake my head and put the stick into my bag of holding and pulled out a Baseball and a couple of mitts.
"How about some Catch? I know it's lame but it's better than nothing." Spike nodded and after I picked up the string we walked to the park... What? You never know when you'll need some string. The park was small but it's perfect for a quick game of Catch.
"Thanks for the game guys!" Some male ponies said as they left the park. Spike and I just watched as they left wondering how a small game of catch turned into Minor Leauge Baseball.
"That escalated WAY too quickly..." I trailed off as we sat down next to a tree and tried to calm down from the competitive game we played.
"Yeah, No kidding" Spike snorted as he caught his breath. He closed his eyes as he leaned back against the tree just enjoying the cooling breeze.
I start humming at first it's nothing but after I pulled out the stick I found and the spool of string it turned into "Come Together" by The Beatles. As I was finishing my makeshift fishing rod I found a bit of metal wire I could jury-rig into a hook...So I did. after that I shook Spike awake an asked if he'd want to go fishing. Oh, fun fact: Fishes are not sentient meaning I won't get killed by the princesses if I eat them. Spike agreed and we spent the afternoon catching dinner. I also taught spike how to clean and eat fish... yeah survival skills and all. another fun fact: pegasus ponies eat fish...but it's prepackaged because they can't cook it worth a damn. after that, we walked home shooting the shit, and we entered the library. spike went to bed and I went to the couch... "all in all, today was a good day." I muttered as I fell asleep.
The plot so far is that some random guy gets shot for making an asshat out of himself and gets sent to Equestria for it. then when he gets to Equestria he meets a sexy zebra named Zecora who gives him shelter. during the night he gets a weird ass dream that goes kingdom Hearts on his ass with some Fate series bullshit mixed in. wakes up with some kind of wood and ventures outside to test out his body (if you know what I mean).
Nothing much had changed but he had the HUD from Infamous(sadly no keyblade). goes to Ponyville and becomes a stoner because of a pebble that made him its bitch. Then after some time (a month at most), he is given a choice: Stay a human and be subjected to extreme racism for being human or become something else with a spell designed to change you into a random species native to the world. After deciding to not deal with xenophobic ponies bullshit he chose to become something else (because being human has no point when you know you're never going home).
Then he wakes up after passing out from the pain of the spell, to find that he's a handsome anthropomorphic wolf. He then gets shipped off to Ponyville, where he finds out he can use magic and he has wings (go figure). After rereading some magic books and lazing around a bit he's kicked off his ass and was taught how to fly. After getting the basics down he was left with nothing to do so he decided to go hang out with Spike the Dragon... He made a pitstop at Sugarcube Corner where he stuffed his face and confuzzled ponies.
Taking a minimal risk, the wolf then parkoured his way to Carousel Boutique once there he opened the door and saw something that will give him the shivers for weeks...He pulled Spike out of it and had a nice game of Baseball with him and some random Stallons that had too much time on their hooves. Then they had a nice time relaxing with a little bit of fishing.
"And that my little journal is what you missed as I forgot that you existed..." I mutter to myself as I finished my entry. "all in all it was a crappy time... At least the time with Spike was fun."
"You know at the start of it I thought I could write a good book..." I was scratching my cheek while looking away from the 6 blushing ponies and one KO'ed dragon. "but it seems that my imagination a bit dirty." If looks could be converted to temperatures then half the stares I'm receiving are only a degree above absolute zero and the other half's the temperature of the core a white dwarf star.
To explain the situation a bit more, I've been practicing with my 'magic' a little by manipulating the magnetic field of a small metallic ball, usually I make it float over a sheet of paper. and while doing that I use a gentle stroke of wind to write, and yes I know I could use my hands and no, I'm not doing it to show off. I did it so I could practice control and expand my limited pool of energy in other words "training".
Anyways at some point, I thought to make it a challenge for myself by putting ink on the ball and either draw or write. I usually drew random characters that popped into my head or a landscape of something in anime. When I'm writing... well it usually ends up with it becoming erotica... Yes, I hate myself for it too, but what can you do with a naturally dirty mind that only grew with all the attractive people around you.
Oh, I'm getting off track... ok, the point is I wrote a small diddy about this guy going to another world and basically getting into everybody's pants by being a 'good boy' and by a 'good boy' I mean he's dense to his own sex appeal and makes the girls want him. I threw this diddy away into the trash because I didn't want Spike or Twilight reading it and i then went to to the park to chill out.
After that, I went back to the tree, and low and behold there was Spike reading a book with the girls reading over his shoulder. I shrug it off and when to drink some milk. I then heard the sound of a body hitting the floor and many strangled gasps. I walk in and Spikes on the floor bleeding out from his nose, and all the girls are in various states of shock. at this point, I realized the "book" they were reading was just bound paper and everything made sense. The rest you know.
"Ya think?"...Ouch, the amount of sarcastic venom in her tone actually hurt... Good job Twilight you've done me proud.
"...wow, I think I rubbed off on someone." while I noted this everybody who wasn't knocked out by my book or administrating the grade A venom I just received nodded in surprised agreement. after that let's just say that Twilight's horseshoe was missing for a bit for it was lodged firmly somewhere between my ass and my mouth.
After that (well deserved) hospital visit the days blended together and a few years passed. The only thing of note was that Twilight became a princess after kick a literal demon's ass with the power of friendship. Spike grew wings, some time fuckery happened and Twilight opened a school...not in that order but it did happen. At one point, I decided to get off my ass and go on an adventure. On that adventure, I learned a few new tricks and finally got what that kingdom hearts dream was about: I could make/summon the weapons that were shown to me, the only one could summon was the bike the others I had to forge and make myself through the knowledge on how to use them was burned(literally) into my brain. and you think that I'd be able to use them properly right away, right? NOPE... I had to do actual "training" its air quoted because it was basically me almost dying in the most epic (painful) way possible.
Rant aside, I made a couple of new friends and settled down in a new town called "Narnia"...ok no you got me it wasn't named that. it was named "Chrono" after the founder: Chrono Graph the best clockmaker since ever. I still visited with the girls on holidays but I'm a bit busy with my job as a border protector because this town's a tiny bit disaster-prone... nothing life threatening just annoying and it blocks business so I take care of it, Chrono was the one to give me bits for my efforts.
A good decade after that I'd settled down with another wolf named Ashley. We did the diddly and had a couple of pups. their names are King and Sky(Sky's a girl. I clarify because some boys do have this name) and later down the line, they decided to take my last name. It a wolven tradition to hold the family last name until their of age or they take a trail to prove their adults and earn it. I'll leave it to your imagination as to which one they chose.
And now the reason I'm putting all of this down in such quick succession...I'm not long for this world, I'm old and sickly, King a couple of ponies took over my job and now I'm retired. Ashley died one year before now and I think it's my time to go. this journal is my final gift to my kids and my will to those who read it.
Live life as you see fit, but never harm the innocent for they have done nothing to you. Speak your mind and let people know what you think, but be acceptable to others opinion it might surprise you how often you find that bit of advice useful. and lastly: have no regrets life is too short to hold on to thing not worthwhile.
With that, I'm finished my life was short but long and fulfilling but empty...but I have no regrets as to how I lived. Goodbye, everyone, I hope you're life is splendid.
As the sound of a quill scratching on paper faded and still and the soft beeping of machines quieted and slowed. An old gray and wrinkled wolf leaned back a smiled and spoke one last line:
"I came here through death, and by death, I will leave, but please don't grieve for little old me. I have lived a life of happiness and adventure. so with one last breath, I will end this juncture. Goodbye friends, celebrate for my life start's a new chapter."
With that, he's gone his eyes closed from now on, but as quick as his life seemed a slower one will start today, tomorrow and then on.
/Update%20113/74-cvy5Rod.png){kind=link}
