The fall
I’m Sorry, I’m Broken, chapter 1, The fall
Warm, if any word could be used to describe the feeling Octavia got when playing her cello, that was the one. Alone on an old bench made of rotting wood, overlooking a vast field, hidden by a small tree line, here sat a skilled musician, a secret place she came across only a few days into her first year of university in Tall Tail City, far from her home in Trotingham. The view, however, was almost meaningless, for it paled in comparison to the world Octavia created when she played. Each cord crafted a new shape, each note a new color, all mixing together in a swirl of dramatic beauty commanded by the young musician. In this time and place, nothing mattered to the young gray mare, only the bow in her left hand, and how she could make her fingers dance across the strings with her right. Deeper she fell into her own world as the fields came alive with the hum of the strings until a blue flash interrupts her colorful spectacle, knocking Octavia out of her trance with a sour note.
“Drat,” She whispers to herself before bringing the bow back to the strings. Again the music fills the air, but only for a few moments before another sour note is struck. Octavia scuffs at her lack of focus as she adjusts herself, checking that every hair is still in place. Once more the bow is brought to the strings only to hit the same sour note with the first’s stroke. “Confound it!” The mare tenses her body in frustration and then relaxes completely before allowing her head to fall into her hand, the bow hangs loosely between her fingers. “Blast you Vinyl Scratch, even here the mere thought of you torments me.”
“Oh great, what did she do this time?” said the voice of another mare. Looking over her shoulder, Octavia sports a mint green mare clothed in white short shorts and a sky blue tang-top, her hair and tail a shade darker than her coat with a white stripe on the side over her ear. Just behind her, another mare, cream colored fur in a white blouse with blue slacks and a bright blue and pink hairstyle that reminded you of candy. “Is it just me or did I hear-”
“Sour notes, I know Lyra,” Octavia whined returning her face to her hand.
The two took a seat on either side of the gray mare, “Ummm Octavia?” The cream colored mare utters as she picks up a strange scent in the air, “Why do you smell like-?”
“Milk Bon-bon, even more sour than my playing just now, Vinyl somehow equipped my dresser with a slingshot full of curdled milk. I was wondering why she wouldn’t throw out that old carton in her room.” Octavia’s lavender eyes fall on her purple vest that covered a white dress shirt, both a shade darker than normal, still moist from the disgusting prank. While her dark purple Skirt was spared, the smell was still insufferable. “I was so infuriated I grabbed my cello and left without even thinking to change. But at least, it will force that degenerates to wait until I return to see the fruits of her labor, with any luck she will be asleep before then.” Without a word spoken Octavia found herself in a warm embrace, courtesy of Bon-bon, “Oh, come now dear you don’t need to-” Lyra made a soft shushing sound as she joined in hugging the gray mare stroking the back of her head softly. For a moment, Octavia simply sat there, enjoying the gentle embrace before the three mares started laughing at one another for seemingly no reason.
“What in Celestia's name would I do without you two,” Octavia asked through her laughter as she throw her arms around her friends.
“Most likely go crazy, jump out a window,” Lyra answered before receiving a firm punch to the arm.
“That’s not funny Lyra,” Bon-bon said scowling at the mint green mare, “That kind of talk is the last thing we need right now.”
“Save the rough stuff for tonight babe,” Lyra quipped with a sly smirk, rubbing her arm “In case you forgot, your childhood friend her is on the verge of tears.” She ended with a pouty face as she motioned her hands around Octavia.
Bon-bon’s eye twitched just before she brought her hand to her forehead, “Octavia, please remind me why I fell for this mare”
Octavia started to giggle heavily, “You’ve asked me that same question at least a dozen times in the past seven months and I still haven’t the foggiest idea.”
“But on a serious note,” Bon-bon stated, “I think it’s about time we did something about you living with Vinyl.”
“Come now Bon-bon," Octavia said rolling her eyes, "it’s just one of her pranks, nothing I can’t handle."
“Yeah, one of how many now?” Lyra asked, “She’s been pranking, hell almost abusing you ever since you two got stuck in the same dorm room. Day in and day out you get one prank after another," The green mare continued waving her hand in a circular motion, "and when she doesn’t have a prank to pull she finds every little string to pull until you’re red in the face. Ho, let’s not forget last time, when she throw food on you at the café, you looked like you were about to tear up. Blue haired bitch would be six feet under right now if Bon-bon hadn't stopped me.” For a long moment, Bon-bon and Octavia looked at the green mare as if amazed, “What?! I do more than make dirty jokes you know, I pay attention, how else would I know that Bon-bon like’s it when I-”
“One more word and you’re on the couch tonight,” Bon-bon snapped as her cheeks took on a slight tint of pink. Lyra's mouth shut tight as if on command, he widened eyes looking straight into her marefriends glare. “But surprisingly enough she has a point,” the cream colored mare continued, “Vinyl has been tormenting you for a full year, and it’s starting to get to you.”
“Oh please,” Octavia scuffed as she prepared to play her cello again.
“Oh no you don’t, we’re talking about this,” Bon-bon said in a motherly tone pinching the gray mares check, “You’ve been getting less and less sleep even with the stuff your doctor gave you,” She said poking below Octavia’s eye lightly, reminding her of the, very clear, bags under them. “You can’t even get out of bed without looking over your room like Daring Doo looking for some kind of hidden trap.” The gray mare’s ears drooped realizing how accurate the comparison was. “You can’t even practice in your own room without looking over your shoulder wondering when she’s going to strike.”
“Yes well…” Octavia paused for a long moment looking at her two friends, trapped in the middle of their longing eyes full of concern. “What exactly would you have me do? I’ve tried getting back at her but she’s a master of her craft." The gray mare smiled nervously, "I tried to prepare a counterstrike once before but she saw it coming a mile away and got me before I even started. How she planted a trip wire under my favorite sweater I’ll never know, thank Celestia there’s tile at the front door or those blasted balloons would have ruined the carpet.”
“I’m telling you, you should suck it up and go see Doctor Wolf,” Lyra said waving a finger at Octavia “he’s got more pull in the university than anyone and you’ve known him for years, he could-”
“Heavens no,” the cellist exclaimed, “It’s true the good doctor has been an old family friend for years now but you know how I feel about his profession." Octavia said, waving her bow back at the mint mare, "Even when we talk casually I always get the feeling he’s deconstructing everything I say, whether he’s trying to or not. No, I will simply have to endure until the end of the semester.” Octavia said as she returned her bow to the strings to play a slow relaxing melody.
“But that doesn’t solve anything,” Bon-bon said in protest, “your just prolonging the problem expecting it to get better when classes are over.”
“That’s right,” The gray mare said seemingly confirming her friend’s fears, “Then will come the next semester, with new classes, the professor, and most importantly, new students,” She added turning to the cream colored mare with a wink.
“New students?” Lyra questioned for a moment, “That means… you can request a new roommate!” she declared enthusiastically.
“Precisely,” Octavia said, “I left well enough alone, or rather bad enough alone, for far too long. As soon as finals are over I’m going to march right down to the main office and ask for a change in rooms.”
“That’s great and all but,” The cream mare said under hear breath, not wanting to kill her friend's optimism, “that’s still a month away, are you sure you’ll be alright.”
“I’ll be just fine Bon-bon don’t worry.” Octavia takes her attention away from her instrument and embraces her old friend warmly, trying to reassure her of her wellbeing. “Well it’s starting to get late, we best be on our way.” Octavia stands walks behind the bench to her cello’s case and a small white shoulder bag.
Opening the case she tips her shoulder bag causing a small orange container to fall out and roll right next to Lyra’s feet. she picked up and inspected the small container and found it to be full of pills, “What the fuck is this?!” she yelled standing up and facing Octavia who glanced over to her green friend holding the bottle of pills. “This better not be what I think it is Octavia!”
“Now Lyra, calm down,” Bon-bon said seeing the bottle and sliding away on the bench from her marefrined, “I’m sure she has a good reason for having those.”
“My ass she dose," He angry mare snapped marching over to her friend, "give me one good reason why I shouldn’t take these and throw them down the drain!” Lyra said now standing over Octavia who had finished putting away her instrument and reached into her book bag to pull out a piece of paper to hand it to Lyra. “Huh?” Lyra read the paper aloud “Medically Prescribed to Octavia Philharmonics to assist with concentration during college finals for the fall semester….. Oh…” Lyra looked past the paper and received a piercing glare from Octavia. “Octavia I-”
“While it’s good to know what you would do if I were to go so low,” The gray mare said coming to her feet and gently taking the bottle from her friend, “Do you really think I would go so far as to abuse drugs to deal with my problems?” Most would have been annoyed by the overly confident look Octavia had at that moment, but it was more than reassuring to Lyra and Bon-bon who gave a sigh of relief. “Normally I would never resort to such extreme measures for my studies,” She continued, “But with Vinyl on my back so much I thought I could use a little extra to keep me focused. I talked to my doctor and he gave me these after a few tests to ensure they would be safe to use.”
“But are you sure you need them?” Bon-bon asked.
“Better safe the sorry in this case,” Octavia responded, “but don’t worry I looked into the medicine myself before it was decided. So long as I take no more than six a day I’ll be just fine.” Lyra and Bon-bon were unconvinced but hold their tongues as the gray mare places the bottle back in her bag. Another prolonged embrace and the three part ways, the couple heading back home while Octavia makes her way back to the university.
As Bon-bon watches her dear friend turn the corner, she can’t help but worry as if a mother scared for her child’s safety. “Maybe we can talk to the-”
“We have Bon-bon," Lyra sighed, "over and over again, the landlord already said no more roommates, only two per apartment.”
“I know Lyra but I can’t stand to see her like this," The cream colored mare said ready to tear up at the thought of her best friend going back to the university. "I don’t care how tuff she looks on the outside, I know her,” Bon-bon said looking into her marefrineds eyes.
“I know what you mean;" Lyra agreed, scratching the back of her head, "she never played like that when you first introduced us and you were right, you can really see how she feels when she plays.”
“Uh, what do we do Lyra?” Bon-bon asked bringing a hand to her forehead, stressed.
“Well, I’m still willing to go right up to that blue haired bitch and knock her right on her-”
“We talked about that too!” Bonbon snapped, grabbing the green mares check and pulling, “What did you promise me when we moved in together?!”
“No more fighting, I know I know,” she said as a sharp pain pulsed in her check, “but come on you know it’s the only way she’s going to stop.”
“Or get you arrested, again!” The cream mare said emphasizing on past events the quickly came to both their minds.
“Well if we can’t hit her and she won’t listen to us then you need to stop stressing out so much and trust your friend." Bon-bon was shocked for a moment by the sheer depth of her words. "For Celestia’s sake, it’s bad enough watching one of you all sad and depressed, you know what it’s like seeing both like that?Aall we can do is be there for her the best we can and hope for the best.” Lyra suddenly found her marefriend looking deep into her eyes as she kept a firm pinch on her check. “What?” she asked.
“Oh yeah, that’s why I fell for you,” Bonbon said letting Lyra’s check go and moving closer, sliding her hand behind the green mare’s neck, playing with her hair, the tension leaving her face and curving into the gentle smile the green mare had grown to love.
“What? Why?” Lyra asked, confused
“Never mind,” the cream colored mare said giving her lover a deep kiss of pure passion wrapping her arms around her the other mare's shoulders.
Lyra wrapped her own arms around her marefriends waist holding her tightly, eager to return the sudden display of affection. A good few seconds passed before their lips parted, but the end of the world would not have parted them any sooner. “Wow…” Lyra whispered, slightly dizzy from the sudden rush the kiss gave her, “What was that for?”
“Don’t worry about it, let’s just get home,” Bon-bon said before moving closer to whisper in the green mare's ear, “and if you're good I might let you do that thing I like.” The tight grip around her waist clamped down, even more, nearly lifting her off the ground. Coupled with her marefriends overly excited expression, she knew that she would not get any sleep tonight. Rolling her eyes, she planted another kiss on her lover before releasing herself from the embrace so they could walk hand in hand.
The breeze grows cold as Octavia walked back to her dorm, the university always seemed so much bigger when she was alone. To spite having memorized the exact length of the campus, it would still feel as if she had walked several miles before reaching her front door. The sky began to dim as Celestia's charge began to set on the horizon, the first of Luna's stars already showing themselves in the distance. “Can I really do it?” she asked herself, “They’re not wrong, Vinyl’s pranks have indeed been getting... under my skin for a while now. Thank goodness I didn’t have to hear that incurable laugh of hers when that milk hit me, who knows what I would have done.” Memories of the past year flooded Octavia’s mind starting with the day they met. Their first day in the dorm and Octavia was halfway moved in before she went to her first class; she then went back to the dorm to find all her things thrown out into the hall. Vinyl had decided to take the room Octavia had picked out. In the coming days, Vinyl would deliver every form of verbal assault using every word in her seemingly low-class vocabulary, to belittle the gray mare. Soon after came the first of many pranks, hot salsa mixed with a carton of orange juice.
She tried many times to talk to the crazy white mare, trying to understand why she had become the focus of such abuse. Each time was met with a horrific bombardment of insults calling Octavia weak, pathetic, annoying. For a time Octavia stopped reacting to Vinyl thinking she would get bored. When that didn’t work she tried fighting back, only to be showed up every time. “You actually think you can step to me, your too high class to play dirt the way I can,” Vinyl said that the first time she tried to set a trap for the blue haired bitch, and she was right. Back home Octavia never had anyone who hated her, some who were nasty to her every now and then, but nothing she couldn’t talk through herself. This was different; Vinyl was tormenting her for the pure pleasure of it, and she had no idea what to do. Now she stood there at her door, just on the other side her tormentor, Octavia took her time sliding the key into the door and nearly jumped when she heard it unlock. Not a sound was made as she pushed the door open and crept inside; the sound of heavy breathing could be heard coming from the door on her left just before the living room at the end of the small hall. “Thank Celestia she’s asleep,” she thought to herself as she took her things into her room adjacent from the other. It was not until her door was closed and locked that the gray mare could breathe easy. The next ten minute were just like Bon-bon said, being spent checking over every inch of her room for any surprises or trip wires. With none to be found Octavia finally got out of her ruined clothes and showered before bed. Starting tomorrow, she would study every day until finals to ensure she receives the highest grade possible.
Morning comes; again Octavia starts her day checking her room for traps, to her surprise there was nothing to be found again. Just when all looks clear and she can eat in peace; her taste buds catch fire upon sampling Vinyl’s classing orange juice prank. Soon after Lyra and Bon-bon knocked at the door with some of her clothes that Vinyl had strung up outside on a tree, After a short chat the gray mare went to the shower to get ready only to have a bucket of cold water come pouring down ruining both her pajamas and clothes for the day. None of this, however, would get to Octavia now, she was focused and ready for what was to come, in one month she would be free of this torment and nothing would stop her. In class was no different, Vinyl was not above resorting to something as childish as spitballs, and was outrageous enough to fully disrupt class to humiliate Octavia. No matter what Octavia would not budge or fight back, she stayed focused, so much so, she never noticed the few tears that started to form every now and then in the corner of her eyes. She would never admit it, not even to Bon-bon, but these childish pranks, this attempt to belittle, degrade, and humiliate Octavia over the past year, it was working. At first, it was nothing, something even Octavia could laugh at, but as she learned that it was only to hurt her, each prank started to feel like something cutting deep into her skin, as if she were being made less of a pony each time.
The more Octavia ignored Vinyl, the more she was attacked with pranks and hurtful words. One week into the month Octavia felt the need to add an extra lock to her door, clearly against the rules of the mares dormitory, but she was willing to risk it to keep Vinyl out. The first hour of having the new lock was greeted with the crazy white mare banging on the door annoyed that she could no longer plant her traps in Octavia’s room. The whole time Vinyl cursed at the gray mare until she was huddled in the corner covering her ears begging quietly for the onslaught to cease. It took her almost twenty minuets to realize that silence had returned, at the same time, after reflecting on how she had spent the last hour, Octavia was starting to realize just how much Vinyl’s words alone were hurting her. Never the less, Octavia did everything she could using the pills her doctor gave her and kept focused on her work, which also, to the gray mares surprise, helped sharpen her awareness to avoid a few pranks Vinyl had laid out across the dorm room. Then it happened, Octavia paused in a deep breath frozen like a statue just outside her classroom, time had passed in a flash, and she had just turned in her last test of the fall semester.
“Yes!!!!” She yelled at the top of her lungs, the last test meant the semester was over for her, and tomorrow she would be able to request a new dorm room. Casting aside every thought and usual mannerism Octavia took off running clear across the campus in search of her friends. Spotting the loving couple the gray mare jumped on the two with her arms starched out giving them more of an excited tackle then the gleeful hug she saw in her mind.
Lyra and Bon-bon now with their backs on the cold concert could only look awkwardly at the historical out of breath mare that laid between them, embracing them both in a crushing grip. “I told you she would snap,” Lyra said being the first to recover from the fall.
The two then brought themselves back to their feet before lifting the joyful mare to stand, “I haha, I'm far from... insane, I'm ecstatic!” Octavia somehow managed to say through her gasps of air. “It's over, I just finished my last test, the semester ends tomorrow and I can request a new room, it's finally over!”
Having never seen the high-class mare act so excited and childlike, it took a moment for the two lovers to process what Octavia had just said. Lyra and Bon-bon were so caught up in their work and studies they had lost track of the days and forgotten that the semester was coming to an end. Confused looks suddenly became wide smiles as the two realized the date and time, in seconds, the three mares were all leaping for joy without a care in the world.
“YOU CAN GET A NEW ROOM!!!” Bon-bon shouted
“NO MORE OF THAT STUPID BITCH!!!” Lyra added, as she reached out to hug the two mares but only grabbing Bon-bon. Looking around she saw Octavia running off. “Hey, where are you going?!” she shouted.
“Are you kidding me,” Octavia called back rhetorically, “I haven't gotten to play my cello all month, I'll meet you at that old bench when you're done with your last class!” With that said the gray mare turned and headed for the dorms as the happy couple stood there in each other arms.
Octavia, having run out of breath halfway home, walked with a kick in her step and the widest grin she had ever worn in her life. Nothing mattered to her at this time, even her shoulder bag that contained three heavy textbooks seemed light as a feather as she entered the dormitory. Four weeks of none stop studying, thirty days of using pills to focus on classes and to relax for sleep. Octavia had lost count of how often Vinyl tried to torment her, but with the new lock on the door, she was always out of reach of the crazy white mare's pranks. However, none of it mattered now, as Octavia claimed the stairs to her room on the third floor, all she could think about was the many songs she would play during the rest of her afternoon. The thought even crossed her mind to pass by the local pastry shop and make the day even better by crafting picnicking for Bon-bon and Lyra, the two perfect friends that helped her through her hard times. The music of the small corner bakery started to play in her head inspiring a new melody. She began to hum the notes to herself as she slipped the key into the lock and opened the door.
And there it was, her custom cello, solid gold decorated the edges of the bright, well-kept oak wood. The brass stem at the bottom and cords of the finely toned instrument seemed to shimmer in the light glowing like a work of art brought to life. The sound of music was so loud in Octavia's mind that it was almost real to her... but it quickly faded as two things shout through her mind. The first was that she had locked her cello in its case, in the closet, in her room. The second was the realization that her cello was in the hands of a mare wearing a jet black leather jacket, a purple tang top, and torn up jeans, that almost completely covered her pure white fur, much like how her violet sunglasses always covered her eyes, while her electric blue mane was unmistakable from even a mile away. “Oh, there you are, hey how to you play this stupid thing? I've been at this all morning.” The mares boyish voice was nearly mute to the gray mare as white hands molested the strings of her cello and the day she had been dreaming of all month, suddenly became a nightmare as she watched in disbelief as her most prized possession was in the hands of Vinyl Scratch.
“AHHHH!!!” Octavia let out a blood-curdling scream of panic that echoed through the halls alerting every student in the building to her distress.
“Ow the fuck is wrong with you, you crazy bitch, I haven't even scratched it or... huh?” Before Vinyl could finish talking Octavia was already lunging to grab her cello. “Nope,” she said tauntingly as she yanked the instrument out of the gray mares reach. “Over here, nope here, what's wrong Octy all tired from studying too late.” Every second that passed Vinyl teased the poor mare pushing her away and into the furniture.
“Please, Vinyl anything but that!!!” Vinyl, while unfazed was delightfully surprised by Octavia's words having never heard her beg before. “Please I'll do anything you ask, I swear it just please give me back my cello, please!!!” The white mare danced around her victor playing keep-away like some school yard bully. Vinyl laughed enjoying every moment until she noticed a strange glint of light on Octavia's check. She didn't notice it at first, but since the moment Octavia stepped through the door, she was crying.
This realization distracted Vinyl enough to through her off balance and trip, tossing the cello across the room and into the wall. “Ops,” she said catching herself before falling, “well serves you right for locking me out like that, you owe me a full months worth of entertainment you dumb bitch and you know what else...”
Vinyl went on degrading Octavia further, justifying her actions, but her voice slowly became little more than a muffled sound in the back round as the gray mare fell to her knees in front of her cello. “Why is she doing this, what did I ever do to deserve this?” she asked herself as she eyed the brass stem snapped at its base. “Was if really my fault, did I do something wrong, have I hurt her in some way, is it OK that she does this to me?” she watched as the broken strings slowly became motionless. “Will a new room even change anything, she'll just go to that room and do the same thing, maybe even to my new roommate.” Tracing the dented, scratched gold Octavia spots a long crack on the body of the instrument.
“But you know what, I guess I should let that all go,” Vinyl said as Octavia became aware of her presence once more. “Because I busted that fucking lock of your, and I'm going to make sure you never get one of those again. So you can have your toy back and... hey are you listening?” Everything went quiet until the last hum of the broken strings of the cello was the only thing that could be heard. At this point, the blue haired mare becomes aware of the crowd of ponies standing outside the still open door of her dorm room. “Hey! You guy's mind? Get the fuck out of here!” her attention was reverted back to her roommate quickly as she saw the gray mare stand up from the corner of her eye.
“There's nothing I can do,” Octavia muttered to herself just loud enough for Vinyl to hear.
“Wh...What are you whining about... won't take much to fix the damn thing up, you could probably have it done by the end of the day.” Octavia remained still as a stone her back turned to everyone, “Hey, if you're really that worried about it I've got some wood glue... you can... have... it...” Vinyl's speech slowed as Octavia finally moved, slowly walking to take a seat on the open window seal. Her eyes blood show and still full of tears, opened wide as if having just witnessed a violent murder. “Hey... I don't think you should sit there...” Vinyl said slowly walking over to the gray mare, her voice becoming softer as she stretched out a hand. “Octavia?” she called her softly.
The gray mare lifted her head and looked Vinyl straight in the eye through her sunglasses, her vision blurred with tears. She looked back at the crowd at the doorway, some of them on cell phones filming and calling others. Her gaze fell back to her tormentor as she took a deep breath that made everyone stand on edge. “No more,” was the last thing she whispered before tilting her head and shoulders backward, guiding her out the window of her dorm room on the third floor.
“OCTAVIA!!!!!!”