We Were Kids

by Carrier of Heartbreak

First published

The post-apacolyptic story of a boy, his family, his mind, and ponies.

In today's world, not many people are left. After the devastation of war, the planet is left in ruins. But that doesn't stop a small group of unrelated kids from trying their best to survive in this new, cruel Earth. The oldest, a boy with no name, takes it upon himself to take care of the younger ones. While scavenging for food, he comes across a strange DVD with cartoon ponies on the cover. He decides to use the show to cheer his family up. But he soon finds that his mind latches onto these cute and colorful ponies, creating a backdrop for which the stresses of life are assuaged. But can he remain responsible enough to take care of his siblings when he is tempted by such happiness?

Chapter 1

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I finally stood up slowly, balancing myself out once I felt my legs lock. Remaining silent, I crept over toward the window, not wanting to disturb my sleeping siblings. The early morning sunlight had just started to peep into our house, a sign that it would soon be time to go outside. I looked down and saw my youngest sister, Kayla, sleeping in a tight ball next to her older brother, Louis. Smiling at their innocence and keeping on my toes, I made my way gradually to the source of the new-found sunlight. A voice could be heard behind me, which I decided had to be Louis snoring, as he usually did shortly before he awoke. His loud nasal bass was enough to make Kayla stir, holding her little pink pony doll even tighter.

I heated some water in a pot after whipping up a quick fire. The pot began to steam quickly and bubbles started shooting out of the top. I quickly took the pot away from the fire, pouring the water into a large coffee mug. I rummaged through the pantry quickly, finding a mint-flavored tea bag and placing it into the boiling water. I sat and looked up, zoning out for a moment. The light was now shining into the window above me, highlighting the dust that floated down and swirled whenever I took a breath. Shaking my head, I snapped back to my chore. I stirred the water with the tea, making sure it turned a dark brown color before taking the bag out and discarding it. Sighing contently, I sat down at the kitchen table and took a sip. I flinched, the hot water burning the taste buds from my tongue. I was used to this, but I never liked when it happened. I never really liked tea, but the smell of the brown liquid brought me memories of the world before, when my father would sit with his own cup and sip loudly before heading off to work. I heard a small noise behind me that caught my attention.

Turning my head, I noticed Kayla standing in the doorway to the kitchen, holding her doll tightly to her chest. I looked behind her and noticed Louis starting to rise, cracking his back and yawning.

"Morning, Louis," I said calmly, taking another sip of the hot tea. He put his hand in the air, his usual morning hello. "Morning Kayla, have a good sleep?"

"M-hm," she answered. She walked in and opened the pantry door, looking for something to eat. Decided on some cereal, she walked back to the table and sat down. As she crunched away on her stale cheerios, I looked back at Louis, who was now standing. He walked over to the table and groaned, yawning loudly again.

"My throat's sore…was I snoring again?" he asked, coughing.

"Kayla's up, isn't she?" I said, smiling at him. He shrugged in defense and walked over to Kayla, taking a handful of cheerios and walking to the door. He pulled back the wooden board and let more sunlight pour in, enveloping the room in its warm glow. Instantly the smoke was visible in the background, filling me with dread as it did every morning. Fires were still burning in the distance, and the only trees were around the house. Besides that, the sun could only cast its light over miles and miles of empty, dried up dessert. Deep black impact craters still lined the horizon, making both Louis and I shiver. The day that it all happened was still fresh in our memories, and would be for the rest of our lives. Nothing could just overpower a sight like seeing miles of city being vaporized by missiles.

"How's Tiff doing…?" I asked Louis nervously, always afraid of the answer. His gaze lowered sadly and he shook his head. I peered in the door at the young bedridden girl, my vision clouding over as it always did.

"She's not getting any better, that's for sure. But as least she's not doing any worse…" Louis said sadly, wiping his eyes. Tiffany was so close to all three of us. She wasn't related, but then again, neither were any of us. We were just four lost youths caught in the machinery of war.

"What do you think made her so sick…?" I mumbled, resting my head against the door frame as I watched Tiffany's chest lift up and down with her small breathes. My fist was clenched in anger, mostly at myself for not knowing what to do."Man, if it was my guess, I would have to say all of this god-damned radiation. Especially at night. Are you sure the house is completely sealed?" he asked me, crossing his arms. I nodded and sniffed, wiping my eyes.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I checked too many times. No, it has to be something else…" I said quietly, stopping as I heard Kayla's voice behind me.

"Is it time to watch TV with Tiffany?" she asked, looking up with eager eyes. I smiled and tried to hide my red eyes, patting her on the back.

"Sure is, sweetie," I said cheerfully, opening the door to Tiffany's room and leading her in. Kayla squeaked with joy and hugged her pony doll again, happy to be able to see her friends again. I ran my fingers through my dirty black hair and sighed, wishing to have her ability to be truly excited for something anymore.

In response to Kayla's gently prods, Tiffany woke up slowly, coughing once before smiling, her eyes half closed. She gazed up at me and smiled wider, her face pale and devoid of the energy it once contained. I smiled back at her and held up the disk.

"Time for the pony show…?" she asked, coughing again. I nodded at her and moved closer, brushing her bangs from her face. She scrunched up her face and smiled, making both me and Louis laugh.

"Come on, guys! I want to see Pinkie!" Kayla piped up from beside the TV, waiting impatiently. Tiffany looked down at her and wiggled her toe. Kayla stopped and moved further away from anything heavy.

"Twitcha twitch…" Tiffany said in a soft, raspy voice. I laughed at Kayla and moved to the TV, leaning down and sliding the disk into the DVD player. I moved back as we all gathered around Tiffany, sitting contently as the next episode started to play. I looked over at my unofficial family, smiling as they all smiled happily, and the theme song starting to play.

"My little pony, my little pony…"

Tiffany smiled up at Louis, pointing out whenever she saw her favorite pony, Rarity. For some reason, Tiffany like how fancy she was, and wanted to be just like her someday.

"I used to wonder what friendship could be…"

Kayla spotted the bakery in the background and leapt up, shouting "Pinkie works there!" I smiled at her and encouraged her to settle down, for Tiffany's sake.

"Until you all shared its magic with me…"

I enjoyed the bright colors, but really just loved spending a happy moment together with all of my siblings.

"Big adventures, tons of fun…"

Kayla now was hugging her Pinkie Pie toy tightly, pointing to the TV and telling it "There you are! That's you, see?"

"A beautiful heart, faithful and strong…"

I looked down at Tiffany, who was smiling and mouthing the words to the song. I leaned down and kissed her forehead, making her scrunch up her face again. I laughed quietly.

"Sharing kindness, it's an easy feat, and magic makes it all complete…"

I bent down, as did Louis and Kayla, getting close to Tiffany as we waited for out cue.

"You have my little ponies…"

And all at once, we shouted the last line, all embracing each other, Tiffany giggling happily as she was surrounding by her brothers and sister.

"Do you know that you're all my very best friends?"

Laughing, I realized for a moment…just for that moment, I was truly happy. My family sat around me, laughing with me, having the time of their current lives. In that room, as the episode of My Little Pony began, we were safe in our own world, without radiation or bandits, without sickness or disease. We were one small happy family of strangers, united over disaster.

We were kids.


_ _ _ _ _ _



I strapped my goggles on above my eyes, so that they were ready to be used when I needed them. I noticed that Louis was getting packed too, and stopped him.

"Sorry, Louis, but I need you here with Tiffany just in case she needs you," I said, sorry that I would have him neglect what he felt was his only use. I told him numerous times that he didn't have to put himself in danger to be loved. But he just wanted to work and feel like he was contributing.

"What? Come on, man. Why me?" he said, throwing his hands up. Kayla looked up from her doll at us, ready to run to her room if we started fighting. Though we very rarely had an argument, she was still very frightened of the possibility. I placed a hand on Louis's shoulder and pulled him closer, whispering.

"Lou, you need to stay here. Kayla and Tiffany need you here now more than ever. I'm used to scavenging and I really don't want to end up getting us killed. Where would the girls be then?" I whispered, looking in Louis's eyes. His expression went soft and he looked over at Kayla, who had gone back to playing. He sighed and looked up at me, taking off his goggles.

"Promise me one thing," he said, placing the goggles on the kitchen table.

"Anything," I swore.

"You run into any kind of trouble, get your ass back here, pronto. I don't know anything about taking care of a sick girl," he said softly, looking down. I nodded and patted his shoulder again. He nodded back and turned around, going to check on Tiffany. I nodded again, even when he was gone. I had to promise myself as well.

I stepped outside and immediately had to pull the bandanna over my mouth. There was a strong wind today that sent sand flying up horizontally. I coughed up the sand I had inhaled before looking towards the nearest town. I had been there numerous times, and each time I found even more food. I looked down at the map, struggling to keep if from getting taken away by the wind. I grunted and finally flattened it out against the side of the house, blinking behind my goggles. So…I needed to go through the south trail today so I didn't get caught too far out in the open. The sand was blowing too hard to ride my bike. I sighed and realized how long this trip could and probably would take. I tossed my complaints aside as my stomach growled.

Walking through a sandstorm was like trying to force two equal ends of a battery together. It just wasn't going to happen without a little effort. So I pushed, using my backpack to stabilize myself against the gusts.

In about an hour, I finally reached the town and find my usual hideout, a small shack that I had reinforced. As usual, I had to light it with candles I had found. The dim light cast itself over the dark room, revealing the many different artifacts that I had collecting. I sat down in my wooden chair, opening a bottle of water to rehydrate myself. Again, I started to feel the usual pang of loneliness in the small room. Just the knowledge that outside was nobody else, was enough to depress me. Back at house, I had my family there to comfort me. Here, was a completely different story. I longed to feel the happiness of when we watched the Pony show. So, in my mind, I made it that way.

Around me, the bright and colorful ponies were sitting, except for Pinkie, who was having a hard time standing still. I watched them, smiling as they talked amongst each other, not too happy about being in such a small, dirty room. Rarity simply refused to sit and get herself covered in dirt. Applejack wasn't having a problem, and seemed actually quite comfortable. I looked over at Fluttershy, who was next to me, looking up at me with her huge gleaming eyes.

"Um…excuse me, sir…but can we go outside…? It's really dirty…and cramped…in here…" she said barely above a whisper. I patted her pink mane gently and looked up at the door.

"Sure thing, Shy," I said, packing up and standing up, the ponies waiting anxiously behind me. Rarity was the first one out when I opened the door, but she didn't seem much happier to be outside. Now that the wind had died down, the devastation from the bombs was still very visible. Empty shells of houses littered the roads. I had to hold my breath to stop myself from making any noise when I saw the remains of my friend's house. I assume that he was killed in the blast.

Fluttershy stayed behind me; the death and devastation was too much for her. I looked down at her sadly and bent down, picking her up. She squeaked at first, but soon got used to the new height and buried her face in my shirt. I patted her mane repeatedly, watching to make sure the other ponies stayed out of trouble.

I finally found Rainbow Dash as she soared through the sky, liking all of this space. I heard her whoops of energy and couldn't help laugh along with Pinkie. Applejack stayed by my side, keeping an eye out. Twilight was intently copying a picture of a strange desert beetle into the notepad I had given her. Rarity was jumping around from rock to rock, squeaking in distress whenever the dirt touched her. I smiled again, feeling protected and in good company. Though I didn't know these colorful ponies too well, their presence definitely made it easier during the long hours of scavenging.

"Hey, AJ, do you mind doing a quick scout out for food?" I asked, pointing to a building to the left of us. She nodded and looked up at me eagerly.

"Sure thing, Sugarcube," she responded, galloping into the ruin immediately. I saw Rainbow Dash notice the chance for a challenge and followed her in. I smiled and looked down at Fluttershy, who was fast asleep in my arms. I could feel the warmth from her breath on my shirt, which seemed to go straight to my soul. I cuddled her gently and moved closer to the house, waiting for Applejack and Rainbow Dash.

I heard some movement before the two came out, carrying supplies between the two of them. I waited eagerly, wanting to know what they had found. They placed the bag that they were holding in front of my, and I bent down, trying not to disturb the yellow and pink pony in my arms. Using one hand, I ruffled through the sack, smiling at their findings. The sack contained a box of cereal, so silverware, a coffee mug-this was going to be Louis's-, a box of nails and a bottle of some kind of pill. I picked up the pills excitedly, turning the white capsule around in my hand so that I could read the label.

"Ass…pire…in," sounded out Rainbow Dash, who was hovering behind me. I smiled happily and looked up at the two helpers.

"It's Aspirin, RD," I told her cheerfully. "Hopefully, this could make Tiffany more comfortable while she's sick."

"Tiffany?" Twilight asked, looking up from her drawing, curious. I looked down at Fluttershy, feeling myself go cold again. I wanted her to be safe…no matter what the cost…but for right now, I really didn't want to discuss it with her.

"Are you okay…?" Twilight asked. She trotted over to me and saw my red eyes, which scared her. She called her friends around to me and looked up, supportive.

"Is…there something wrong, darling?" Rarity spoke up, finally on the dry ground next to me. I kept my face hidden, using Fluttershy's mane to conceal my tears. Sitting down against a dead tree stump and taking a deep breath, the ponies followed me. I closed my eyes tightly, not wanting to talk to them about such strong emotions.

When I opened my eyes and looked up, they were gone. Fluttershy was no longer on my chest, nor was she ever. I couldn't even feel the warm spot from her breath anymore. I looked down and saw the sack, full of items I had just pulled from the house. I had a few scrapes on my knees from crawling in the wreckage, but I barely felt the pain. I sighed and slung the sack over my shoulder, continuing onwards.

It was about noon when I started to head back. I had scavenged plenty more houses and found a decent number of food articles. There was enough to feed the four of us for about a week, and enough water for about four days. I grabbed some water from the shack to make an even week before setting off again, back home. The wind was picking up again so I pulled my goggles over my eyes and lifted my bandanna over my mouth. Luckily, the wind was hitting my back so it didn't batter my face area as much. Despite the advantage, I was now carrying a lot of extra weight. Obviously, that meant that I was using up more energy, and it would also now take more time to get home. I grunted again as I felt an especially strong gust of wind, which carried the cold, stirring sensation that made me stop dead in my tracks. I felt it again.

Sand storm!

I instinctively opened up my map, holding it tightly so I could read it. I needed to find the closest checkpoint to my current location. I had set up many of them, but they would occasionally get robbed or blown down by the storms. I coughed and heaved once, feeling the sand particles enter my lungs. I needed to get out of here if I was ever to make it safely back to my family. My family! They were counting on me!

I pinpointed the closest surviving checkpoint with my thumb and looked around, trying to determine where south was. I just barely saw the sun starting to set through the thick sand, which was starting to blot out the light. I needed to hurry. With a quick shuffle of my gear, I took off running towards the checkpoint, not stopping even when my lungs were at the point of bursting. My forehead covered in sweat and my clothes even more drenched, I limped to the entrance of my safe-house and opened the door. Stumbling in, I quickly locked the door behind me and started the generator, which in turn started the air purifier. I gasped and planted my mouth on the pure air coming out, feeling the red pang of pain that I knew all too well in my lungs. I coughed again and looked around, needing somewhere to lie down.

Luckily, I had made a bed last time I was there. I plopped down on top of it, letting my lungs fill with sand-free air before opening my eyes to think. I would have to turn on the outside sensor so I knew when it would be safe to travel again. I would also need to clean my clothes out and let them dry before using them again. I sighed sadly, starting to worry. Sand storms were never predictable and could go from an hour to weeks. I had no way of knowing how long I would be stuck here, and how long my family back at home would go without food. Oh crap, the house! I remembered the house suddenly, fearing that Louis may not have locked it up in time to stop the radiation from leaking inside. I grabbed a fistful of hair and pulled, screaming as I yanked it out by the roots. I needed to get home!

For the next day or so, I sat alone in my safe house, buried in my own worries. I wanted nothing more than for the Radiation Sensor to finally start beeping, signaling that it was safe to travel. I got barely any sleep during my seclusion, and dark rings had started forming around my eyes. Whenever I even tried to fall asleep, the thought of Tiffany, Louis and Kayla popped into my head and my eyes pried themselves open for the next few hours.

I cried silently to myself often over my fears, but it was only when I thought about my own seclusion and loneliness did the ponies return.

I lifted my head after crying and was surprised to see six worried faces above me, all supportive. I smiled weakly and opened my arms, welcoming them into a hug. They all smiled and moved closer, their colorful puffy mains tickling my neck as they hugged me. I felt their warmth and sat there, hugging them tightly. Finally, Rainbow Dash spoke up.

"Are you going to sit here like this forever?" she asked, her voice muffled by my shirt. I opened my eyes and smiled, loosening my grip on the group of ponies. They all sat down around me, never leaving my sight. I felt once again protected in the company of these cute and fluffy friends, enough where I immediately collapsed and fell asleep.

When I woke, the sun was shining through the small glass window over the door, and a soft beeping could be heard. I heard shuffling and yawning next to me, and smiled when I knew that the ponies hadn't left yet. I rose and stretched, my body cracking in numerous places. Yawning, I stood up and went to the door, looking outside. The sand storm had finally passed. I smiled and tiptoed passed the sleeping ponies, all five of them…wait, weren't there six? I looked around and finally found the missing pony.

Rarity had done the liberty of washing my clothes, and was stitching them up now, obsessed with the smallest detail. I walked over to her and patted her mane. She jumped in surprise but settled down when she looked up, smiling tiredly up at me.

"Pardon me, darling, but these clothes just HAD to be mended. They were driving me absolutely insane," she told me, continuing with her work. I nodded and watched her, fascinated by her magic handiwork. I would have never been able to do anything close to that.

While she worked, I could almost feel my own fingers sting from the needle. I shook my head and looked down for an instant, holding my hand tightly. I shook it as if trying to wake it up after having it fall asleep.

"Thank you, Rarity," I whispered to her, patting her head again. She let me this time without stopping her work, just liking the praise. I smiled and sat down next to her, spreading my legs out. I never really had the chance to talk to one pony at a time.

"You know, Rarity, my sister admires you a lot," I whispered. Rarity stopped her work and turned to me, surprised.

"She…does?" Rarity asked, sounded rather confused. She must not be aware of her own TV show and popularity. I nodded my head and looked up at the ceiling.

"Tiffany. That's her name. She's…quite sick, actually…" I sighed, looking down at my lap. I was ready to talk to them about it now…I think.
Rarity turned her whole white pony body towards me, her expression sad. "Oh, dear, that's dreadful! Do you know what she is ill with?" she asked, placing her front hooves on my legs. I shook my head, not knowing what to say.

"We have no idea, and that's what so…DAMN aggravating…" I said without thinking, letting my emotions get the better of me. When I saw her shocked face, I immediately apologized. I didn't want to scare her.

"Oh, darling, that's quite alright. I understand that you must be going through a very hard time…" Rarity sympathized, leaning her head against my shoulder. I smiled down at her and closed my eyes. I loved being able to talk to someone. Feeling alone was worse that starvation, I had found. When you're starving, at least you're starving as a family. I opened my eyes quickly again to make sure she was still there, and was relieved when I saw her working my clothes again. I wanted to say something else, but wasn't quite sure what was appropriate.

"Um…Rarity?" I asked softly.

"Yes, dear?" she asked, focusing on her work and what I was saying.

"When we get back…do you mind spending some time with Tiffany? I would mean the world to her…" I asked further. She looked up at me with gleaming eyes, nodding.

"Of course, darling."


An hour later, I was out the door into the morning sun. Taking a deep breath, I reveled in the ability to breathe clean air once again without an air purifier. The ponies were right behind me, keeping me company. Rainbow Dash took to the skies again, wanting a better view. I picked up Fluttershy again, which she seemed to love. I walked in my pack of friends, chatting with them or telling jokes, whatever passed the time. It made the trip seem like minutes, regardless of what we did.

I finally saw my house, and started running in joy, Fluttershy bouncing in my arms. She squeaked in protest, but seemed to like the thrill of this speed. The ponies ran behind me, while RD flew ahead of me a couple of times until she got bored and decided to run with us. It became a race between me and the ponies, and the ponies obviously won. By the time I reached the house, the ponies were gone. I looked in my arms but was saddened to see that Fluttershy was once again gone. I was beginning to understand how their company worked, and sort of expected for them to not be around when I was around others.

I burst inside, shouting to my brother and sisters. "Guys! I'm home!" Immediately, I heard scrambling and loud, heavy footsteps inside, racing to where I was standing. Louis cleared the couch in a single jump and landed in front of me, throwing his arms around mine and squeezing me.

"Man, don't you EVER do that to us again!" he yelled in distress, but he remained wrapped around me. Kayla was close behind him, wrapping her arms around my rib section, crying and clinging. I for one was just happy to see that Louis had closed the house up nice and tight so that the radiation didn't leak in. I hugged my siblings back tightly, picking up Kayla and holding her in my arm. Louis let go and brushed himself off, walking over to Tiffany's room.

"What have you guys been up to for the past few days?" I asked, placing the sack of found items on the kitchen table. Louis let Kayla hold his hand as they walked back over to Tiffany's room.

"Just watching more of the pony show…" Louis said, trying to act like it was against his will. He wasn't fooling either of them. I followed them to Tiff's room, but stopped them when I heard a small voice from inside. I put my ear to the door and listened intently, wondering who she was talking to.

Inside, I could hear her small voice, mumbling as she slept. I smiled weakly, hoping that whatever was going on in her mind, Rarity could be there alongside her.

Chapter 2

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I sat next to Kayla on the living room couch, watching her play. Seeing her imagination at work was utterly fascinating to me. I watched with wide, curious eyes, as if she were a modern marvel.

Louis walked over, wiping his eyes once again. This time, I assumed that he was more exhausted than distressed.

“Louis, when is the last time you got any sleep?” I asked, my eyes still locked on Kayla’s session. He blinked at me and went cross-eyed as he tried to think.

“Three....days, I think,” he mumbled, looking around at the windows. It appeared that the light was starting to irritate him. He looked down at me and his eyes focused on my hands. “Man, what happened to your fingers?” he asked, staring at the multiple needle-pricks on my fingertips that had bled and smeared. I looked down at my fingers, surprised myself.

“Um...I’m guessing that I shouldn’t try mending shirts anymore,” I smiled, showing him the sloppy stitches in my shirt. He nodded, backing away. I guess blood made him nauseous.
I stood up and moved to the boy, patting his back. I really did feel proud of him. He did exactly what he needed to in the proper amount of time. His responsible actions kept two young girls alive, one of them very sick. I was used to doing things like that, but I was much older than Louis.

“Look, man, do you mind if I take a quick nap?” he asked, painfully trying to keep his eyes open. I smiled at him and spun him around by his shoulders so that he was facing his bedroom door. He smiled in return and walked slowly to his bed. I could hear him muttering under his breath as he walked, but then I heard the bed springs squeak under the weight of a person and his voice was silent. I smiled to myself again and sat down next to Kayla.
She looked up at me with big blue eyes and turned her body around, facing me.

“Do you want to play ponies with me?” she asked, her eager little eyes glinting at me. I almost laughed and looked around.

“That’s not fair. You have Pinkie Pie, but what do I have? A bloody coffee mug?” I laughed. She looked down, not used to swearing. I patted her shoulder, chuckling awkwardly.
“Sorry, Kayla, didn’t mean it,” I spoke softly and calmly. She looked up at me again and grinned. She reached on the floor for a second before thrusting something into my lap, nearly knocking the wind out of my lungs.

“You can play with him!” she exclaimed, her voice getting loud from excitement. I looked down into my hands to see what she had given me.

A dirty rag. A dirty rag with googly eyes sewn onto it.

I wrapped the dirty rag around my hand like a makeshift sock puppet and made it speak to her. “Kayla! Why didn’t you want me, Kayla? Wasn’t I a good dirty wash rag?” I made it say. Kayla giggled and made Pinkie Pie respond.

“Oh, silly, of COURSE you were a good dirty wash rag. But even the best dirty wash rag still isn’t very good...” Pinkie spoke in a high, obnoxious voice. I laughed this time and responded.

We continued on like this for about an hour, Kayla getting progressively more sleepy. Finally, just around when the sun was completely gone from the sky, Kayla slumped over into the couch and was instantly sound asleep. I smiled at her and leaned forward, pulling the blanket up over her small body. She was the most peaceful and innocent while she slept. She was also not as loud...

I got up and stretched, hearing my bones crack once again. I walked over to the door lazily, taking advantage of being well-stocked and able to rest. I remembered that I needed to lock up the house for the night.

Walking towards the door, I grabbed the handle to the power circuit and flipped the switch. Instantly, gears began turning in the walls and heavy steel panels began lowering over all of the windows and doors. I stepped back and listened to the heavy metallic sound that the gears made. I felt especially proud of them, being the designer and builder. Many of the pieces were found during scavenges, from the remains of factories. The rest, such as the wires and circuit board, were found in some old computers. I smiled and turned around as the gears topped, signalling my cue to go to bed.

Dimming the lights, I looked around one more time and took a deep breath. It was good to be home. Home!

I looked over at the bag of new findings and picked it up, emptying the contents. I instantly saw the bottle of aspirin. Smiling, I picked it up and started walking towards Tiffany’s room. The floor creaked under my weight as I slowly entered the dark room. Inside, I could hear nothing. Walking forward, I moved to Tiffany’s bedside and reached down, patting her tiny shoulder.

“Hey, Tiffany, I got some aspirin. Want to try some?” I asked, opening the bottle and spilling out a few pills into my palm. I sat down and held my hand out, to see if she would take some. She remained still.

My eyes grew wide with fright and I shot my hand onto the girl’s small chest, trying to feel for a heartbeat. I could feel nothing but unnervingly cold skin.

"Oh god!!” I shouted, rushing over to turn the lights on. I spun around to face her and almost collapsed.Her face was blank and white, her eyes open and staring aimlessly. She was completely still. I stumbled forward just as Louis and Kayla ran to the door, trying to see what I shouted for. The sight of Tiffany’s stiff body hit Kayla like a ton of bricks and she started sobbing, latching to Louis’s side. Louis, crying as well, sat down against the wall, holding the distraught Kayla.

Together, they huddled and cried, while I managed to find my way to her bed again through a wall of tears. I reached down with trembling hands, picking up Tiffany’s small body. Her skin was cold and pale, her eyes were grey. I pulled her tightly against my chest and let out a cry of pure pain, my voice cracking as I continued to scream.

“Please! Please...please...please...” my voice lowered, but I still held the tiny girl. Tears were covering my face, and I was completely blind. My body shook violently as I cried, the room and its colours swirling around me. In my mind, there were only the two of us. Tiffany and I, locked in a grim dance. My eyes shut themselves tight, trying to regain my vision.

Finally, it was Louis who pulled me away from her. I tried to push myself back to Tiffany, trashing my arms and legs. Luckily for Louis, I had neither to energy nor the heart to fight back. He dragged me into the doorway, where he and Kayla latched themselves onto me. Continuing to scream, I began to yell out her name. I thought that maybe...if she were still here, she just needed to find her body again. I wanted to guide her back. So that we could be a family again. A Family...

The world eventually slipped into a dark mist as we cried ourselves to sleep. We sat in a huddled mess, dry tears staining our faces, our eyes red. Tiffany was gone.

And so was our family.


I was the first to wake up. The very first thing I did was to dig a grave for Tiffany. Using the shovel, I spent about two hours pulling the soil from the earth. When I finally dug a hole deep enough, I kept digging. Throughout the entire time I was working, I never made a sound. My eyes remained dry. My body didn’t shake or shiver. I was completely emotionless. I started thinking about leaving. I didn’t want to have to take care of anyone anymore. Why should it be my responsibility? I never even knew these kids before the missiles hit. I really didn’t have any reason to stay there, so why should I? I kept thinking about this while I dug, until the sunlight drained my mind of any thoughts at all.

Louis and Kayla walked out to join me an hour later. Louis had Tiffany’s tiny body wrapped in a blanket, her pale feet still exposed. I looked at Louis with a dead expression, nodding to the hole. He looked at me, frightened. His eyes were red again from crying, and he must have been scared from my lack of emotion. I turned my back to him as he lowered the blanket-covered body of Tiffany into the grave. When he was done, he crawled out of the hole and took the shovel, starting to refill the grave with soil. Suddenly, Kayla walked to the edge of the grave. I turned an watched her, the life in my eyes sparking for a second. What was she doing? As I watched, she took her Pinkie Pie doll and leaned down, placing it gently on top of Tiffany. Louis watched her proudly as I had to turn around again, the feeling of life returning to me. My eyes finally began to water as I thought about what Kayla had just done. Then it hit me.

I wasn’t the only one who loved Tiffany. She was all of our family. Kayla knew that. Louis knew that. Why had I been so stupid? I knew now that I was still looked up to. I needed to protect the family I had left, or we all would end up like Tiffany. Turning around, I wiped my eyes and looked at my two siblings. They were standing there, looking at me expectantly. I nodded and walked closer to the grave and helped Louis finish filling in the hole.

Together, we said some kind words about Tiffany before going back into the house. It was the very least she deserved.


I took a walk later on. The house was starting to get to me. Just the fact that Tiffany had been alive and well less than 24 hours ago just stunned me. Why had she died? Well, she was sick. Why now? Again, she was sick. Sick with something unknown. Nothing lasted forever. Why her? She was our family.

With Louis watching the house, I began my walk to the town I had visited days before. In all truth, I wanted to see the ponies again. What would Rarity say? Or Fluttershy? Why did I care so much about what these imaginary ponies thought anyway? I didn’t want to think about it, but I did want to talk. Knowing that Tiffany probably would have never gotten any better and would have lived her life in misery anymore sort of helped me cope with her death. Only a little, though.


I walked for a few hours, my goggled rested on my forehead. The weather was unusually calm today. The most that I could feel was the occasional breeze that blew through my hair. I didn’t even bother wearing my bandanna. It was as the universe was given me a day off from it kicking my ass.

When I finally arrived in the town, the first thing that I noticed was the shack where I had first seen the ponies. It was in the same exact condition as when I had left. Sometimes, I wished for someone to take the items inside. At least then I would know that my family wasn’t the only one out here. Loneliness began to eat away at me again, just like I wanted. The ponies only showed up when I was lonely. I decided to take a break and started walking toward the small shack when I heard the sound of hooves behind me. I smiled weakly, happy to be able to see my friends again, even if they weren’t really there.


I held the door for the ponies, watching them as they shuffled into the hut. But something struck me very quickly.

“Where’s Rarity?” I asked, noting the absence of the white and purple pony. The ponies looked at each other, not sure themselves.

“Ah think that she’s visiting her friend, sugar cube,” Applejack answered. I looked down sadly. Out of all the ponies, Rarity was the only one whom I had spoken to out Tiffany. She was also the one I wanted to talk to most.

“Which friend?” I asked, my throat starting to close from disappointment. Twilight looked up at me and tilted her head, thinking.

“I think her name was...Tiff...” she struggled to pronounce. My eyes grew wide.

“Tiffany?” I asked, my legs going weak. Twilight looked up at me, putting her hoof to her head.

“Yes! Oh course, how could I forget?” she said, looking embarrassed. She didn’t have the time, as I fell backwards into a rack of empty water bottles. I smacked my head on the metal beam holding the shack up, but didn’t feel it. So Tiffany was finally able to speak to Rarity...as sad as being reminded that Tiffany was gone, it was supporting to hear that Rarity was taking good care of her. I looked up, my vision swimming. I saw a blur of different colors, the ponies all gathered around me worriedly. Shaking my head, I regained my vision and took Rainbow Dash’s hoof in my hand. She looked surprised, looking at me. My eyes looked up at her, begging.

“Please, if it would be possible, could you please tell Rarity to bring Tiffany with her next time?” I asked softly, trying to keep myself from crying again. Rainbow gave me a supportive look and nodded.

“You can count on me,” she stated matter-of-factly. I nodded, sniffing.

“Of course I can. Thank you for being so loyal...” I whispered, my vision fading again. The surrounding ponies watched me lose consciousness, Fluttershy squeaking in fright. I felt my head lifted by a pair of hooves just as the world went black.


“Is he awake yet?” I heard a very familiar voice say. The sound of her made my eyes snap open. I sat up and looked around for her. I saw the ponies surrounding me, smiling.

“We have a surprise for you, darling,” I heard Rarity say from behind me. Rarity!

I spun around to face the white pony, throwing my arms around her immediately. She stumbled, not expecting such an immediate response. I let go, looking at her expectantly.

“I missed you, Rarity...” I said softly, wiping my eyes. She smiled at me and patted my messy black hair.

“And I you, dear,” she said, turning to the dark corner of the shack. “Come out darling, he’s really eager to see you.”

My heart skipped a beat and I swallowed, looking to where Rarity was talking. The moments went by like years while I waited. But nothing was coming out.

I was suddenly tackled from behind,a pair a tiny arms latching themselves around my waist. I coughed and started laughing, tears streaming down my face.

“Gotcha!” Tiffany’s voice said from above my head. I struggled to reach behind me and finally found her side, tickling her gently. She laughed uncontrollably and toppled off of me while I continued to tease her ribs.

The ponies stood around and smiled as they watched us, save for Rarity, who was trying her best not to cry. Trying to maintain her ladylike composure, she turned her head from the other ponies and just sniffed repeatedly. Applejack chuckled softly at her, causing Rarity to start giggling herself.

I got hold of Tiffany and just held her high above me, treasuring the sight of her liveliness. She wiped my eyes with her finger and looked at me curiously.

“Look, I’m not sick anymore!” she said happily, twisting my hair in her fingers. I smiled and pulled her into a tight hug.

“I’ve noticed, Tiff,” I said, laughing at myself. She smiled wider and wiggling out of my hug. Running to the door, she opened it and looked outside.

“It’s good to be able to walk,” she said, taking a deep breathe. I watched her in awe. She then turned to me, a devious grin on her face. “How ‘bout a quick race?”

I blinked but quickly smiled, looking over at Rainbow Dash. “How about it?” The multi-colored pegasus ruffled up her wings and charged forward. “You know it!” she shouted before taking off out the door. I smiled as Tiffany’s hair got blown around from Rainbow’s charge. She smiled at me and started running. I puffed and took off after the two, the other ponies following behind us. I didn’t care that I was chasing my own mind. It felt amazing.

“Hey, no fair!”



We chased each other to my heart’s content, screaming and sweating for what seemed like hours. Every so often I would stop only for a break, only to have either Tiffany or Rainbow Dash tackle me.

“Come on, lazy! Run!” one of the would should. I would respond like lying there like a slug. It was my only defense.

I hadn’t had so much fun in years. It was so perfect, if only the rest of my family could be there. Tiffany, the ponies and I running, screaming and playing. I nearly collapsed by the time the sun started to set. But I knew I needed to go home now, before the eerie creep of radiation set in for the night. The one thing was that I didn’t want to leave Tiffany so soon.

“Hey Tiffany?” I asked, looking over to see where she was

“Yes?” she answered from underneath a pile of ponies.

“Would you be able to walk back home with me? I’m not sure when I’ll be able to see you all again...” She smiled at me and squirmed out from the pony-pile.

“Of course,” she said cheerily. I smiled and walked to her, wrapped my hand with hers. The ponies following, we began our walk home. Skipping, Tiffany began to sing the My Little Pony theme song. Instinctively, the rest of us joined in.

Laughing, we all sang my heart out. Nothing would be able to break up the happiness of the singing group of friends. Everything was perfect.

I was so happy, in fact, that I barely cared when I saw a man staring directly at me as he stood next to his jeep. He was staring at me, just a boy alone in the desert, no weapons or friends to protect him. I was completely alone.

Chapter 3

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When I woke, I noticed a strange brightness around me. I hadn’t seen this level of sunlight in years! It was so bright that it was still blinding me through my eyelids. As I rubbed my weary eyes and yawned, the Ponies gathered around me in shock. I blinked up at them, the bright colors entering my peripheral vision, giving me a headache. What was going on? That seemed to be the only idea going through my head. But I barely had time to think as I was pounced on by a bright pink blur.

“You’re here! You’re here!” Pinkie shouted over and over. I laughed a little, nervous about what she meant.

“I’m here? What do you mean I’m here?” I asked in complete confusion. The other ponies looked around, Applejack whistling to herself, trying not to be singled out. I looked around and almost had a heart attack.


“I’m in Equestria!” I thought to myself as I took in the cartoon-ish landscape and bright, blinding colors. I was sitting on a plane of bright green grass, overlooking Ponyville. The sight amazed me, but not because it was pretty. It was amazing more in the sense of “How the hell did I get here?”

“Um...how is it possible that you’re here?” asked Fluttershy from behind me. I looked around at her and shrugged, no more sure than her. Around me, the ponies found of comfortable position. It seemed that no matter how impossible things were to them, comfort as still issue #1. I smiled, as this struck my humor cord.

The one thing that was bothering me was that the ponies weren’t real in the first place. If they weren’t real, then how on Earth am I in their world? It almost felt like I was intruding on my own imagination. But...that couldn’t be the case. I was in, as I said, their world. It had to be real. There’s no way that I was the only real being in this world...maybe I was the one that...

I didn’t have anymore time to think as I felt myself being tugged at. I looked down and saw a very small, young yellow pony with a large red mane pulling at my sleeve with her mouth. I blinked once again and stared at this oddly familiar pony.

“Applebloom!” I heard Applejack yell. The yellow filly let go and turned around slowly to face Applejack. “What in the name hay are you doin’?” she scolded. I felt bad for the small pony, who was looking down and shuffling her hooves.

“Ah just wanted to see what ‘e was...” the filly mumbled. My legs began hurting so I stood up, frightening Applebloom. I remembered who she was at that point, but didn’t was to interrupt Applejack to tell her so. This seemed like a sister thing that was beyond me.

“Now dat don’t give you permission to go pullin’ on whomever you darn well want to,” Applejack continued. They continued to converse as I looked up, just noticing Rarity. She was laying down on the hill above us, observing what was going on. I got a chill of inferiority and felt as if she were looking down on us as a higher being. I shivered but walked to where she was. Smiling sweetly, I sat next to her. She smiled back at me before returning her gaze to the other ponies. I cleared my throat and spoke.

“So, uh...how do you think I got here?” I asked calmly. She looked around at me and went silent for a moment. She then spoke very softly.

“That hardly matters at this point, don’t you think? We both know that you shouldn’t be here and you can’t stay,” she said, here eyes remaining friendly and honest. I was stunned by her outright words, but I knew that she was right. Being here could throw the balance off of...wait a minute, how could I ruin the balance of something that didn’t exist?

I was suddenly jumped on by Rarity as she grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me. I made a small yelping noise in surprise.

“Wake up! Wake up!” she screamed at me. I was so shocked that I couldn’t respond to her. I closed my eyes to blink but couldn’t open them again. The brightness around me faded and darkness flowed in around me. The warmth I had felt was also gone.


I woke up in a cold sweat, Kayla sitting next to me.The first thing I noticed was that she was crying and looked terrified. I was immediately on alert, shooting up into a sitting position.

“Kayla, what happened?” I demanded, looking around. Even though it was all just a dream, my eyes still had to adjust after being in such sunlight. She cried silently next to me, holding herself. Something was very wrong.

“There’s...a man in the kitchen...” she choked. My eyes grew wide with fright. A man in the kitchen? Oh crap...that guy I saw staring at me yesterday! I threw the bedsheets off my lap and stood up silently. I could see light coming in from under my door and knew that had to be him. Silently, I crept to the door, Kayla remaining on the bed. Opening the door, I looked out and saw the shadow of a man in the kitchen, going through the cupboards. On the ground...

I almost fell over in shock as I saw the unconscious body of Louis on the floor, a small pool of blood formed around his head. I choked as I took a breath. Sitting in a stunned silence, I began breathing quickly, my pulse rising. He made a small groaning sound, letting me know that he was still alive. I looked from Louis to the man, the fear in my heart changing to anger. How dare this man come into my house! Hurt my family! Steal my supplies!

I stood up in a blind fury and rushed to the man, screaming like an insane animal. Kayla jumped up from the bed behind me and ran to the door, watching in horror. The man heard me and seemed genuinely surprised, but quickly composed himself and picked up his shovel. I was running so quickly that I couldn’t stop myself to avoid the shovel as it ran a collision course with my head, sending me sprawling backwards.

The room was suddenly filled with light as an intense pain shot down from my head to my spine. I curled up and shouted in pain, the new gash on my head leaking. Blood dripped down my forehead and onto the floor, creating my own pool. The stars soon turned dark as I began to lose consciousness, but not before I saw the man moving towards Kayla. I tried desperately to stay awake, but the pain overtook me. The last thing I heard before the world went black was Kayla’s shrill scream ringing in my ears.


--


This time, when I awoke, I was in a sitting position. I blinked slowly, a dull ache in my head still eating away at me. Trying to remember where I was last was hurting...but the wetness on my face and hands drew my attention away. I tried moving and felt that I was sitting on top of something squishy. Or in this case, someone.

I looked down in horror at the body below me. It was the man! Or, what was left of him. His face was impacted, as if his skull had caved in. His blood was everywhere. On my face, on my hands...and on the shovel that was still clutched tightly in my left hand. I stared at the shovel and forced my hand to open. The shovel fell to the ground with a loud clang before going silent. My hand was white and tingly, not having been relaxed in a long time.

I slid off of the man, trembling. What had I done to this man? But more importantly, why didn’t I remember any of it? I heard a soft whimper behind me and turned to look at the source.

Kayla was huddled in the corner of the room, curled into a ball. Her face was hidden as she cried, her pink pajamas covered in the man’s blood. She was shaking, visibly, even in this light. I crawled towards her, my body sluggish to respond. As I reached for her shoulder, though, she squeaked and cowered from my touch. I caught a glimpse of her face and nearly started crying. Her cheeks were puffy and red from crying. Blood was smeared down her front, in an almost splatter-like pattern. Her eyes were small and terrified. She was traumatized.

I backed away from her slowly, my heart sinking. What had I done? I heard a noise to my right and looked around to see Louis stagger to his feet, holding his blood-soaked head. He groaned and looked around slowly.

“Where is that dick?” he asked, clenching his fists. “I had him...the coward used a freaking shovel...”

I pointed to the bloody mess next to me, sniffing. His eyes caught sight of the body and he backed up against the wall. His eyes went wide as he examined my subconscious handiwork. He looked from me to the man and coughed once.

“Um...yeah, uh...nice work you did there...” he said nervously, backing away from the body. I looked up at him, my face remaining locked in the same emotionless expression.

“I don’t remember doing it, Louis,” I said quietly, my voice cracking.

He looked at me, his eyes growing wider. “What?”

“I DON’T REMEMBER KILLING HIM!” I screamed, throwing my fists in the air and bringing them down onto the hardwood floor. Another jet of pain washed up through me. This time, I ignored it. Louis looked at me for a second before he noticed Kayla sitting in the corner, crying harder. He moved to her as quickly as his unstable body could take him.

“Kayla, are you okay? What’s wrong?” he asked, taking the shaking girl into his arms. She didn’t reject him, which made it all the more heartbreaking for me. Despite this,I answered for her.

“He grabbed her,” I spoke quietly, my fists still embedded int he floor. Louis looked down at me as he picked up the blood soaked Kayla. She hid her face in his neck, not looking at me at all. Was she so scared of what I did to protect her that she couldn’t even look at me?

“I blacked out. I woke up with the shovel. The man was dead,” I continued on, not caring if my sentences made sense or not. Louis stood there, trying to form the image in his head. A quick sob from Kayla ushered him to take her to her room again. He walked away from me, taking the only witness to what horrors I might have and probably did to that man. I was left alone with the corpse of the man whose skull I had just crushed in with a shovel. In my head, I could hear his soul screaming at me.


--


I spent the rest of the night awake in my room while Louis got Kayla washed off. I sat in my room and cried to myself, alone and broken. The state of my mind was now so bad that I could perform actions without my brain telling me to. I knew now how dangerous I truly was. I didn’t even know whether or not I should remain in the same house as Louis and Kayla. I didn’t want them to end up like Tiffany...I couldn’t deal with that...not again.

I heard a small voice behind me which immediately caught my attention.

“You did the right thing, darling,” Rarity’s voice spoke to me. I tried to see her, but could only make out a shadow formed from the outside moonlight. The other ponies weren’t around. That was actually fine with me. I wouldn’t be able to deal with Pinkie right now. Rarity understood me the most. I got up on my elbow and looked into what I assumed to be her eyes.

“I killed a man, Rarity,” I argued, wiping my eyes. She reached up and placed her hoof
on my shoulder. I could actually feel her warmth and smell her breathe. She smelled like flowers and fabric.

“Dear, you saved Kayla. That man would have done HORRIBLE things to that poor darling. How is it that your actions aren’t justified?” she spoke so gently that I started to close my eyes.

“I wasn’t even awake for it, Rarity...I’m talking you right now...hell, this morning I was in bloody Equestria. Am..I going insane...?” I asked nervously, looking at her.

She rested her head against mine so that I could feel her slick purple mane against my mess of black hair. She was so warm and comforting...

“Dear, you’re only as insane as you let yourself become,” were the last words I heard as I began to fall asleep. My cloths were still covered in blood, as was my face. My hair was soaked in the blood from the gash in my head. I lazily rolled over after Rarity had vanished and looked up just in time to see Louis staring at me.

His eyes seemed disbelieving in the light that surrounded us. My eyes went wide again as I realized that he had seen me talking to thin air. I hadn’t used her name, right?-oh crap.

“Who...were you talking to?” he asked, taking small step back. “And why did you say Rarity’s name?”

I looked at him, trying to act as if I didn’t know what he was talking about. But his next words came as a shock.

“You see the ponies too...?”