It's not the same
It was nothing but pain for Trixie.
It was two years since that incident with the Ursa minor at Ponyville. A whole year since the Ailcorn amulet was removed from her.
And after that, it was nothing but pain for her. Not physical you see, but emotional. Every where she went, angry mobs will chase her out of villages, towns or cities. Calling her horrid names, wishing her to never return or worse. She was very lucky to find a place to stay that hasn't heard what she'd done. She stayed at an old inn, not far from Canterlot. It's surprising how things didn't reach here of all places, not too far from the capital or even Ponyville. But nopony lifted an eyebrow to her, just another mare in the inn, nothing more and nothing less. Her room was nothing special, not that she needed anymore. A single bed, a coat hanger, a nightstand and a drawer with a mirror on top of it.
She stared in the mirror with cloudy eyes. She looked like the same Trixie she knows, but she felt broken, helpless and most of all, of which she had never felt for a long time: Lonely. The feeling of being alone brought back a flashback. A flashback that made her felt a bit better.
It was twenty years ago. She was only a filly back then, around four or even five she didn't know. Why? Well she was an orphan, she was told she was one of those age cause the orphanage found her on their door steps in a box with only a small blanket to keep her warm. They couldn't tell if she was a newborn or one year old, so they just guessed what age she was and she just stuck with it. She didn't have a lot of friends or any friends in fact, for they'd been adopted by other families. So in truth, the ones she friended with, soon left the orphanage to be with their adopted families, and they didn't came back to see her again. She was bullied though, almost all the older foals did. She was the smallest and the weakest in the orphanage. She told the owners about the bullies, but they just put them in time out and just bullied some more of her when they get out, sometimes every day for every week. She didn't felt welcomed, not one bit nor did she felt like she had a home, cause she was bullied in the only place she could rest and be feed with warm meals, so long as the bullies don't take her plate first.
One day, being bullied again. She felt so sad and separated from the others, she decided to walk outside the orphanage, without telling anypony about it. She thought that'll only make her get more bullied or felt like she was a burden to the owners. She walked outside the orphanage's gates and headed straight onwards, with her head down as the tears began to fall down to the ground. Because her head was looking down and her eyes filled with tears, she didn't know she headed into an alleyway. The ones she was told not to go into alone. She walked for five minutes until she bumped into something, something soft, something alive. She looked up with tears in her eyes still and gasped in shock from what she bumped into.
Standing tall, covered in a green cloak with blue and purple stars, was a strange biped creature. It looked like a primate she saw in a animal book. But this one had no tail, not a lot of fur and much, much taller then an primate. It wore on top of its head a hat with the same colour and stars as its cloak. Its face had light blue eyes like her coat, small nose and ears, brownish eyebrows and darkish hair under its hat. It looked down at Trixie with a friendly smile as Trixie looked at it with a frighten stare and shaky knees.
"Why hello there, young one" It said with a friendly tone in its deep voice. It then kneel down to get somewhat the same level as her. "What are you doing here alone?" Its smile faded as it saw Trixie's eyes filled with tears. "What's wrong?"
Trixie's voice was to scared to say anything. But shortly, she said: "P...please don't hurt me"
"Hurt you?" The creature's head lifted a bit in surprise from what Trixie just said to it. "I would never hurt a cute, little filly like you" It then rubbed its chin as it thought for a second. "Maybe the reason why you're crying is because..." It then brought one of its hand behind one of Trixie's ears and pulled out a golden coin. "A bit is in your ear!"
Trixie gasped in surprise as she placed one of her hooves over the ear the creature pulled the bit out of. She giggled a bit from it.
"And" The creature said with a bit of amusement in its voice. It then went to Trixie's other ear and pulled out another bit. Trixie once again, placed her hoof over her ear and giggled some more. "You must be made of bits" The being smiled again as it gave the two bits to her.
"H..How?" Trixie asked in wonder. "How did you do that?"
"Magic, my dear" The being simply answered. "Magic" It then began to look around. "Where are your parents, my dear? Surely a little filly wouldn't come here all by herself"
Trixie's head fell down again. "I'm an orphan" She sadly replied.
The creature's face dropped. "Oh, I'm so sorry" It said with pity in its voice. "But even so, you shouldn't be here alone, lets take you home"
"But I left because I'm always bullied there!" Trixie protested. The creature once again rubbed its chin as it thought for a second. Then it clicked its fingers.
"What's your name, my dear?" It asked as it picked Trixie up and carried her out of the alleyway.
"Trixie" She answered
"Well Trixie" The being continued. "Mr. Lulamoon will have a little word with these bullies and the owners of your orphanage"
And so Mr. Lulamoon did. The surprise in all of the bullies's faces was priceless. The owners thanked Mr. Lulamoon for bringing Trixie back. For many weeks, Mr. Lulamoon came to the orphanage to show off his magic tricks. One was he pulled a rabbit out of his hat with a click of his fingers. He made a flying, magical raven fly around the orphanage with two sweets in its talons, and it always gave one of those sweets to Trixie. He always asked her to help with his magic show. He once made her into a pretty princess with a crown and a pair of magical wings to go with it. Or he did the same trick he did at the alleyway. Every orphan quickly became friends with Trixie, and those bullies who still bullied her, got a little surprise. With the same raven, Mr. Lulamoon made it so whenever it crowed, a little lighting strike hit those bullies and made them a laughing stock. But he was always there for Trixie, almost every day and all weekends. Trixie loved Mr. Lulamoon for being her closest friend. Until one day...
"Trixie" Came the voice of one of the owners. Trixie went to see the owner who called her. "You've been adopted!"
Trixie's eyes widened. "Really? By who?"
"By Nigel!" The owner answered.
Trixie's head tilted in confused. "Who's Nigel?"
"Ah, I'm hurt" A voice from behind Trixie joined into the conversation. A voice, Trixie knew all too well. She turned around and saw Mr. Lulamoon standing right at the front door with his magic cane.
"Mr. Lulamoon?" Trixie said. "You're Nigel?"
Lulamoon chuckled. "I think, you shouldn't call me 'Nigel'" He then kneed down. "but instead, you should call me 'Dad'"
Trixie's mouth dropped. She has been adopted by none other than Mr. Lulamoon himself! Her eyes welled up with tears of joy, as she ran towards him and jumped into his opened arms. She jumped so hard, that it nearly brought her new dad down to the ground.
"Thank you!" Trixie cried with joy. "Thank you so much" Her cries of happiness brought tears to the owners, some near orphans and even Nigel Lulamoon himself. But he stood up with Trixie in his arms and began to walk outside.
"Come, Trixie Lulamoon" Her new dad whispered into her ear. "Lets go home"
And so they did. And so they did.
Trixie's dad brought her to his home. His house was a small building on the edge of the town. But it was large enough to hold a family. She had a room that was filled with all of her stuff she had back at the orphanage. A bed with the most warm and cosy blanket and pillows. A window that showed a beautiful view of the countryside and most of all. She had a family, a dad who loved her. And she felt like she was finally at home. All thanks to Nigel Lulamoon, her loving new dad.
As the daughter to the best magician of all time. Her dad taught her all his secrets in showmanship. How to create those awing magic tricks, how to summon the magical raven and the one she was looking forward to was how to get bits out of somepony's ear. Nigel was too looking forward into teaching her his tricks, as they practiced everyday of every week. From dawn to dusk. As Trixie's magic was getting stronger, so too was their bond as daughter and father.
As the years passed. It was Trixie's eighth year birthday. She learned a lot from just watching Nigel doing his spells. She only knew a small bit of his magics, after all he was much older then her, so he got more experience in casting magic. But this time, she was learning how to summon the same raven as the one her dad summoned at the orphanage. She tried and tried, but it seemed that she couldn't. But her dad reinsured her that she can, if she only believed that she can. He told her that the only reason she couldn't summon the raven was because she thought it would be too hard to cast, but if she used her willpower then mind power, then she could cast almost anything. With her dad's words of a wisdom in her head, she tried one more time. Her horn glowed and she focused all her magic. She then heard a strange sound, it sound like something had just fell from the sky and landed on the ground. She opened her eyes and saw something on the ground, shape as an egg. She looked to her dad and he just nodded, telling her that it's okay. She slowly walked up to the egg. But as she was almost able to touch it, the egg started to hatch. A beak came out of the egg and then Trixie knew what she did. She didn't summoned her dad's raven, but instead she summoned a newborn raven. Nigel told her that these ravens are linked to the summoner's magic like your heart is linked with your body, it is part of you. As Trixie was only little when she summoned the raven, so too shall the raven and both will grow together. Trixie was so overjoyed that she had learned one of Nigel's most recognised magic spell. But that wasn't the only great thing that happened to her that day.
"Trixie" Her dad said with pride in his voice. "Look" He pointed down at her flank. Trixie turned to face where Nigel was pointing and her mouth dropped. There on her flank was her cutie mark. A light blue moon with stars in it and a magic wand like her dad's magic cane.
"I got my cutie mark!" Trixie yelled in joy. "I got my cutie mark, dad. I got my cutie mark!" She then jumped around the room fill with the same joy as the time she was adopted. Her dad laughed with her. He then picked her up and swung her around in happiness. They laughed and laughed. This was a special day, a very special day indeed.
Some years later. They got a wagon so they could travel all across Equestria to show their magic tricks and spells. Trixie was so excited to show off her magical tricks to everypony. But Nigel told her it's not about showing off, it's about making people smile and leaving them in amazed and awe. Trixie learned so quickly that she could do almost all of her dad's tricks and spells. However she still didn't know how to do that coin trick. Of all the things she had learned from her dad, that trick she couldn't understand nor would Nigel teach her that. Well not yet at least. Both of them had their stage names. Nigel's one was simply 'Lulamoon' while Trixie chose to call her 'The Great and Powerful Trixie'. Her dad didn't really like that stage name but didn't really argued about it. All of their shows was amazing and magical for their audiences. They always left with bags of bits from the crowds thanks to their magic and tricks. Trixie loved it. She loved the fame, she loved the attention and all of the ponies crying out their names. But Nigel didn't. He didn't care for the fame, the glory or the money. All he cared was making everypony smile, laugh and enjoying the show. This was the only thing the two had different ideas on what showmanship is all about. What it meant and what it's for.
But like all things. Time catches up and things were more different. Trixie, now a full grown mare, was always looking forward to the next show. She always practised and readied herself. While her dad was now an old man. He used his cane more of a walking cane then a magic cane. His raven was as old as him. His spells and magic was still grand and awesome. But he didn't used them much often. To say the least. He wasn't his younger self. No, those days had left him and are now with his daughter.
They were resting on a tree near to the next town for their show. Nigel thought they should stop for a moment and look though some of their past photos in their memory book. They've looked at the time Trixie was a small filly, around two weeks since she was adopted. Then a photo of her wearing her dad's hat that was way too big for her, it covered her entire body. Then they looked at the time where she just got her cutie mark and another photo when she started her first ever show. But their favourite photo was where Trixie was sleeping in her dad's arms while he was looking down at her with the biggest smile they had seen on his face.
Soon. Nigel placed the book down next to him and looked at Trixie.
"Trixie" His old voice said. "Before we go into the town, I've got a little surprise for you" He then pointed towards the wagon. "Inside the wagon, there's a little box with your name on it, open it will you?"
"Of course, dad" Trixie answered. "Trixie will be back in a second" Her dad just chuckled from his daughter's third person point of view speech. She went down the wagon, but before she could enter the wagon, Nigel called for her.
"Trixie" Nigel called. Trixie looked at him and he continued: "I love you, you know that?"
Trixie smiled. "And I love you too" She then walked into the wagon, leaving her dad resting on the tree. Nigel's eyes was watering up with tears for how proud he was to his daughter. He then picked his cane that was next to the memory book and summoned his raven. He simply nodded his head and the raven went to the wagon's window, where his daughter should be. As the raven landed where the window was. Trixie was already at the box with her name on it. She then opened the box slowly and saw what was inside. Inside was a light purple cloak with blue and golden stars all over it like her dad's. She smiled as she lifted it up with her magic and wore it, she looked in the box and saw a pointy hat with the same colour and shapes as her cloak, once again like her dad's. She wore it and smiled happily. The last thing in the box was a letter. Trixie picked it up and read out loud.
"The show must go on" Trixie read. She lifted one of her eyebrows to this. Trixie only thought for a few seconds before she knew what it meant. She looked at the window to see her dad's raven, perched and watching her while also, vanishing into thin air. It made one more crow, but it sound slowed down and also... Dying. As soon as the raven disappeared, her dad's cane fell as well with a loud thud. Trixie rushed out of the wagon and saw her dad laying on the ground with his eyes closed.
"Dad? DAD!?" Trixie yelled in disbelief as she ran towards Nigel. As she was running, she casted a magical flare up into the air. The flare were used by unicorns if they needed help immediately or they are lost and cannot find their way back to safety. Nearby poines saw the flare and rushed towards where the flare was casted while Trixie held her dad close as she let out a cry of despair and lost.
Trixie couldn't hold the tears anymore as they began to fall uncontrollable like a fountain. She remembered the funeral of Nigel. Not a lot of ponies came to his funeral, mostly because he didn't really had close friends, his travels prevented him to know his audience or the ponies he entertained. Those who came to his funeral was the orphans at Trixie's orphanage, because he stayed there the most. Trixie barely knew their names, she couldn't anyway, her dad's death was too overwhelming for her to know some other pony's name on that day. He was laid to rest where he died, at the tree where his last moment was looking though his memory book and knowing his daughter loved him.
"D...Dad" Trixie whispered sadly, as the tears still rolled down. She lowered her head. "I... I miss you"
"Maybe the reason why you're crying is because..." Came a echoey voice from behind Trixie. She looked up with watery eyes in the mirror and saw where the voice came from. Standing behind her was Nigel in his green cloak and hat with blue and purple stars. Although he was covered in a glowing aura. He used one of his hand, to go behind one of Trixie's ears and put out a bit. "A bit is in your ear!" Trixie's eyes widened. Her dad was standing right behind her. But alas, she knew it was only a figment of her imagination, playing with her emotions. However, that was put to rest when Nigel flicked the bit and it landed on the table. She looked down and heard the sound of it clashing with the table. The bit was real! A real, golden bit! Trixie, as if by instinct, turned around in hopes that her dad would behind her for real. Sadly he was not. No, nothing but the room she was in, was right behind her, not her dad. She turned back to the mirror, where her dad, while smiling, shook his head.
"I'm afraid, my dear" Her dad began to speak. "That is a power I cannot control"
"Dad" Trixie said, but with a bit of happiness for seeing her dad one more time, even though it is only a ghost. "I miss you, I miss you so much. Everything went horridly wrong after your death, I cannot show the magical show you once performed, and I couldn't make it glorious like you once did"
"Glorious?" Nigel tilted his head in confusion. "When was my shows glorious, Trixie?"
"When you were around" Trixie explained. "Everypony loved your shows, they shouted for more and you gave them more. Every little foals wished for an autograph from you and have a picture with you. But ever since your death, I couldn't get that glory you had, even with my title as 'The Great and Powerful Trixie' didn't helped. So I made lies, I said that I defeated an Ursa Major in single combat" She then lowered her head again in shame. "So some colts decided to wake up an Ursa Minor and brought it to the town for me to beat it. If it wasn't for a pony name Twilight, it would of destroyed the whole town. I left the town defeated and embarrassed. But returned for revenge with a powerful amulet, but the same pony, Twilight tricked me and I left the town once more defeated and embarrassed" She waited for Nigel to either get anger or be disappoint at her actions. But instead, she just heard him chuckle, as if she tried to do something and failed in the process.
"Trixie Lulamoon" He said while chuckling. "I didn't teach you all of my tricks and spells to get your name well known, and to show off your magic to the crowds, nor did I ever did those shows to make it 'glorious' my dear" He then kneel down and lifted Trixie's head so she could look at the mirror. "Do you remember the time you walked into that alleyway and bumped into me?" He asked.
Trixie nodded, to which her dad continued: "I remembered a little filly, eyes filled with tears and was all alone. The first thing I did, to make you feel happy, was showing you a trick of mine. When I showed you that trick, you smiled and giggled. Then I took you to that orphanage and soon adopted you to be my daughter, and that was my best idea I ever had." He then wiped some of Trixie's tears away. It was strange, even though he was not there, he could still wipe some tears from her eyes. "And that's why I did those shows for everypony to see. Because I could make somepony smile, giggle or be amazed by the tricks and spells I had under my sleeves. Even time somepony did those things, it always reminded me the time I met you. A little filly, eyes filled with tears and was all alone to the mare I know and love still, even when I'd passed away"
"But it's not the same" Trixie protested "You're gone and now I'm all alone, it feels like I'm back at that orphanage. Being bullied and being pushed aside, telling me they don't want me or telling me I'm a evil pony"
"I said I've passed away, Trixie" Nigel replied with his comforting smile. "But I never said that I am gone. Every trick and spell you casted, was once from me. Every time you slept and dreamed, I was there to keep you safe from the outside world. And every memory you have of me, from the day we first met to the day of my death. I live within you" He then pulled Trixie's head towards him, even though she couldn't see him, what he said next made it all clear for her. "I have NEVER left you and I'll never stop reminding you that. For you're my daughter, my magician, MY greatest gift this world has ever given me"
Trixie's eyes welled up again. This time not from sadness, pain or being lonely. But from knowing she's never abandoned by her dad and he loves her more then life itself. She then looked back at the mirror to see him again, he was now standing up and sadly, starting to disappear.
"Wait!" Trixie cried as she touched the mirror in hope to stop him. "Don't go!" Her dad just looked at her and his smile grew larger so she could see it.
"We all have destinies, Trixie. There's no doubt about that." He said as he slowly disappeared into thin air. "But it is our actions that makes our destinies, not what people tells us." After he said that, he closed his eyes and his spell of being visible through mirrors stopped. Trixie stared at the mirror for what felt like weeks. But soon she smiled and wiped her eyes. Suddenly the bit that was resting on table changed into a photo. She looked at the photo and picked it up. It was one of the photo in her dad's memory book. It showed little Trixie riding on her dad's shoulders with both of them smiling joyfully. On the photo was something written on it. It said 'I'm never gone and never will be'. She then turned the photo to see if there is anything else written down. On the back of it was Nigel's last trick to teach her. The magical bit that comes out from pony's ears.
'Complete your final lesson. Love dad'