"Your" mom doesn't have that much time to spend with you, despite her best efforts, but that's okay. You know she had super important things to do. Plus you can just hang out with big sis Twily!
"You" are the son of the ever busy Princess Celestia, who despite genuinely loving you as much as any good parent should, can't make as much time with you as she'd like. Twilight, your unofficial big sister, tends to spend her time with you though if she isn't at one of her lessons or studying.
Was bumbling around /mlp/ and made a thing. You might enjoy it, you might not, it's here either way. Updates will be very infrequent. They are also being presented to you as is, only edited to fit the general rules of the site.
You were found by Celestia when you were just a wee little babu. She thought you were exceedingly strange in the most adorable way and so took you in as her own. Six years later and your a happy little tyke, but not everything's perfect. Mommy definitely loved you, anyone that saw the two of you together would never question that. Problem was, you two weren't together that often. Mommy was a princess, so she had to do a bunch of important princess stuff. One of the biggest things was teaching big sis Twily how to use her magic better. Well, she wasn't really your sister, but since she was always around the castle while you grew up and spent so much time with mommy it just kind of became your unofficial relationship. She had a lot of stuff to do too, her lessons, studying, and watching baby bro Spike, but she could make more time to be with you than Mommy. She helped you learn to read, kissed your boo boos better when mommy wasn't around, and was just an all around great big sis!
You were currently sat out in one of the public royal gardens, reading one of the books Twily had given you.
"Oy, whats the princesses pet doin' here?"
Looking up you saw a unicorn colt who looked older than you with a fancy little bow tie glaring at you.
"Shouldn't you be on leash?"
He had a thick accent that you didn't really know how to place. Standing up you think about what Mommy always told you when dealing with meanie-butt ponies.
~"The best way to get rid of your enemies is to make them your friends dear."~
Mommy is really smart and lots of ponies came to ask her stuff, so you knew what she told you must be true. Smiling you hold out your hand to the colt, who backs up in disgust from it.
"Hi, my names Anonymous! But you can just call me Anon. Whats your name?"
Looking at your hand for a moment he smacks it away with a hoof a puts his nose in the air.
"I'm Money Wraps, son of High Top and Candy Street."
You shake your hands few times, his hoof hurt.
"I-it's nice to meet you."
"I'm sure it's nice for ya to meet anypony when your not stuffed in a cage."
Starting to get really hurt by this meany pony's words you try to keep to what mommy said.
"I don't live in a cage, I have my own room. We could go there and play some board games if you want."
At this Money sneered.
"Play with YOU? Please, it would be more dignified to roll around in mud with pigs!"
You could feel tears starting to well up in your eyes.You just couldn't understand why he was being so mean, you were just trying to be his friend. Just as you were going to start sobbing you suddenly felt a presence behind you.
"And JUST what do you think your doing to my little brother?!"
Money jumped a little from the sudden interruption but regained his composure quickly.
"And who do you think yo-"
His words died in his mouth once he saw who he was talking to. Having turned around you were now openly crying into big sis's shoulder has she hugged you. While she held you gently she gave Money a stare that was trying to kill him.
"O-oh, Miss Twilight. I'm so sorry about talking to you like that, I didn-"
"Can it. What I want to know is why you were talking to Anon like that, NOW."
Money was now starting to quiver.
"My deepest apologizes, I was merely misinformed on who he was. I-"
"MISINFORMED?!"
The colt looked to nearly pass out right there on the spot.
"You don't need the right information to understand that he was trying to make friends with you!"
Money was now crouching on the ground, sweating and shaking.
"I-I-I-"
"But if you really have to know, this is Anonymous, PRINCESS CELESTIA'S SON."
The poor colt couldn't form words now, just a scared little mess on the ground now.
"I'm only going to give this one chance,-"
She leaned in to be face to face with him.
"Get out of here and don't come back, or not only will I tell the Princess, I will personally come after you. Understand?"
With one shake of his head as conformation Money Wraps went running, going out of sight in a few seconds.
With him gone big sis gave her full attention to you. You had calmed down a bit, but were still crying. Sighing big sis maneuvered you around so that you were now sitting on her lap under the shade of a tree.She began cooing in your ear and rubbing your back, telling you that it's all right now.After awhile you felt better. There was something you wanted to ask Twily.
"Big sis?"
"Yes Nonny?"
"Mommy said that if I tried to make him my friend then he wouldn't be mean anymore. Why didn't it work?"
Again sighing big sis gave you a funny look like she was really sad.
"Anon, there are just some ponies that are too mean to be friends with. I don't like to say it, but some ponies just don't like others because of the way they look."
She looked off to the side, staring at something you couldn't see.
"Your mom tries hard to make things better, but unfortunately not even she can change the world on her own."
You contemplated that a little bit.
"Then I'll help her change it! I'll help her make so mean ponies aren't mean anymore!"
Big sis gave you a big grin.
"Really now? The brave and noble prince will help make the world a better place?"
You puffed out you little chest.
"You bet!"
Big sis's grin turned mischievous.
"Then prove it by beating the tickle monster!"
She suddenly assaulted your sides making you laugh as your tried to get away. Big sis always knew how to make you feel better.
It was a cold day, the weather team having had to push Winter Beginnings up on the schedule this year. The weather team hadn't started bringing in the snow clouds yet has the sudden schedule change had them just as flustered as everypony else was.
You were enjoying a walk through Canterlot main street with Twilight by your side. You had on a button up tweed jacket and a pair of baggy jeans while Twilight just wore a scarf and some saddle bags. She had a book with a title that you couldn't read levitating in front of her, checking to make sure you were still by her while she read. You had to kind of push her left or right to keep her from running into anything, but you didn't mind. It was like a game!
Normally you would have one of your personal body guards with you, but your mommy trusted Twilight enough to let her watch over you by herself, despite her apparent obliviousness. With you being diligent for any potential hazards you lead Twilight to your destination, a little coffee shop on the corner of Trot Well Ave. Normally if you and Twilight went out into the city to eat you went to Doughnut Joe's, but you decided you wanted to change things up today. Ounce you got close to the entrance of "Cozzy's Cafe" you nudged Twilight in the barrel.
"Twily we'er here!"
Blinking up from her book she looked around. Chuckling nervously she pulled a bookmark from her saddle bag, marked the page she was on, put her book away and smiled down at you.
"We got here pretty fast Anon, I must really not have been paying much attention."
Opening the door you let Twilight go in first, mom had told you it was gentalcoltly thing to do.
"Naw, I just know Canterlot like the back of my hand."
Twilight giggled as she passed you. You two quickly find a seat near one of the windows. It's not long after when a earth mare waitress come up to you too. She looked bored, holding on to the menus she brought with half lidded eyes looking more at the table than you two. When she went to put the menus in front of you she finally took a good look and froze. She just starred, looking back and forth between you two. You were used to it, you know your not like other ponies so they tend look and being the princesses son wasn't going to do much to help that. Twilight wasn't quite as well know as you are, but it wasn't often that your mommy took students, or that student passed her entrance exam by turning a baby dragon into an adult.
It wasn't until Twilight coughed that the waitress snapped out of it.
"O-oh Miss Twilight, Prince Anonymous! I'm so sorry for not addressing you prop-"
You hold up a hand to quiet her. It's something Mom taught you to do when ponies were acting really funny because your a prince. It always seemed funny to you that ponies get really quiet just because you held up your hand.
"It's cool, we'er here just to enjoy our self's, no reason to act all weird. I know what I want Twily, what about you?"
Twilight glanced down at her menu still in the mares hoof one more time before smiling back up at the waitress.
"I want some choco covered hay fries and a cup of that sweetie cider you have here."
"And I want a grilled cheese sandwich with cool-a-coola!" You say excitedly.
The poor mare nodded nervously, took back the menus and walked away. With her gone you look at Twilight.
"So has mommy taught you any mega cool new tricks?"
"Celestia doesn't teach me "tricks" Anon, she's teaching me spells and different ways of exploring magic."
"Okay, so has she taught you any mega cool new spells?"
*Hehe* "Yes Anon, she's taught some mega cool new spells recently."
"Oh oh like what?!"
"Well there's this one where I can-"
"Prince Anonymous! Can we please get your autograph?"
You both were startled out of your conversation when two ponies spoke rather suddenly, seeming to come from out of no where. One was a short white pegasus stallion while the other was an average looking pink unicorn mare. She was holding a napkin in her magic while he held a pen in one of his wings. They had taken you by surprise, but this isn't the first time this kind of thing has happened, so you recover fast enough.
"Um..Sure, no problem."
You take the pen and napkin.
"So who do I make this out to?"
"Bright Light and Harsh Winds!" They reply adorably at the same time.
You quickly try scribbling something on the napkin, tear through it due to your haste, grab a new one from the napkin dispenser thingy, and carefully write a quick little blurb on it.
Bright grabs it after you hold it out to them and she reads out loud what you wrote.
"To Bright Light & Harsh Winds, I hope you have the bestest day ever and plenty more after it! - Anonymous Solar."
The pair had the hugest grins. They thanked you profusely and went off on their way. When they were out the door Twilight looked at you slyly.
"Well look at just whose mister popular~."
You felt a small blush creep up on your cheeks.
"We-well of course! I'm a prince after all, why wouldn't ponies want my autograph? It's not like it's a big deal or nothing..."
Twilight always love poking fun at you when ever somepony went all star crazy over you.
"Riiiiiight, I'm sure you don't care at all that all these ponies treat you like a celeberty."
"Yup! Like mommy always says, a good prince is a humble prince."
"So you really didn't care when that candy store owner gave you free gumballs?"
"Yeah..."
"OR when that street performer played your favorite song just because you walked by, or that they even knew what your favorite song was?"
You sunk a little in your seat, heat practicly radiating off your face.
"Not at all..."
"ORRRRR-"
"I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT THAT EITHER, OR ANY OTHER THING YOU CAN THINK OF! I'M A PREFACTLYHOMBALLPRINCE!"
In exasperation you shouted out, rushing to get the words out before Twilight could continue. It worked, but only because she was nearly falling out of her seat laughing. You slouched fully into your seat now as you waited out her laugh attack. When she got a hold of herself she looked at you with a grin worthy of fancy analogies used in books.
*Ha*"Did you say I'm a prefactly homball prince?" *HaHa*
"Big words are hard when your trying to talk fast..."
Shacking er head as the last of her giggles got out of her system Twilight lit up her horn. You felt a light pressure on your head that ruffled your hair a little.
"Your just too adorable sometimes, you know that?"
You didn't meet her gaze.
"I'm not adorable, I'm regale."
Twilight just let out one more ha.
"Right, how could I ever forget? Now do you still want to hear about my spell? It let's me make mustaches!"
That caught your interest, but you didn't want her knowing that you were THAT interested.
"Yes..." You grumbled under your breath.
To say your waitress was confused was an understatement. You guess she wasn't expecting you to have not only a mustache all of the sudden but also a full grown beard as well? You need to remember to leave a good tip.
She's been acting all secretive and whispering to ponies about things that you apparently weren't allowed to know. You've even seen her talking to some other kids about whatever it was! All throughout the last three weeks you have done your darnedest to try and learn her secrets, but she always had a cookie or some other treat to distract you with whenever you asked. On top of that, she was even busier than normal, which you didn't even think was possible with her already crazy princess duties, and you've been spending even more time with Twilight because of it.
Not that you didn't like spending time with your unofficial big sister best friend forever, but you're practically living with her by this point! She takes you and picks you up from school, watches you most of the day and then finally mom comes and picks you up near the end of the day.
What was going on?!
Right now you were playing with Spike, Twilight having picked you up from school a little while ago. He was only three years old so it was pretty easy to keep him giggling as you used some sock puppets to talk to him.
"Hey Loopy, how are you doing today?" The white sock on your right hand said.
"I'm doing okay Mike, but gee wiz am I stumped!" Said the purple striped sock named Loopy on your left hand.
Spike, in his high chair as you two were at the dining table at Twilight's part of the castle, was entranced by your FLAWLESS performance.
"Oh, I am ever so sorry to hear that good chum! Could I help in any possible way?" You gave Mike a deep gravely thunder clap like voice, which came out more adorable than it should have thanks to your own squeaky voice, because you had given him his name first and thought that's the kind of voice somepony named Mike would have.
"Well you see, I just can't figure out how I'm going to tickle a friend of mine without arms!" With Loopy you just made your voice a bit higher because you got lazy.
"I could help you tickle them! We can double team them, so who's this friend of yours?"
Spike was on the metaphorical edge of his seat as you gave him a sly grin.
"Well, he's small, no bigger than a baby, is purple and green, and is really cute!"
Spike's eyes threatened to consume his face has he looked on, his mind wondering who this mysterious baby sized purple and green adorable person could be!
"Hmmm, could it be..."
Quickly Loopy and Mike sharp turn to look at Spike and rush him, each sock person attacking one of his sides as you yelled.
"-SPIKE?!"
"AH HA HA HA!"
Your tickle ruse had worked wondrously and Spike was powerless to stop you and your cohorts, then Twilight walked into the room.
"Hello Anon, I'm glad to see your playing nice with Spike."
At last relenting your assault on the poor infant drake you wave at Twilight with Loopy.
"Yeah, we were just playing around with some socks, I-"
"Waaaaait a second..."
Stopping you mid-sentence Twilight walks up a bit closer and takes Loopy from your hand to have a closer inspection of her.
"-This is one of MY socks! ANON!"
Giggling nervously you lean back in your seat throwing Mike, who was one of your own socks, over to Spike to nibble on.
"Yeah, none of my socks exactly felt...girly enough to be a girl, so I got one of yours."
Heavy blush across her face Twilight closed her eyes and counted to ten before teleporting the sock away.
"I can't get into the details now, you're still too young, but please understand that socks for ponies hold a much different meaning than the kind you wear Anon."
"Oh, I already know."
Twilight's pupils shrink nearly to the point of collapsing into black holes while you just proceed to play tug of war with Spike.
"What do you mean "I already know"?!"
"Since I've been here at your place so much I've been doing a lot of reading, you have your own freaking library after all, and I found your "Special Stash" under your bed."
You let Spike win by letting the sock go, him going back to slobbering over it, as you turned back to face Twilight with an innocent smile.
"Ponies don't need socks to keep warm like I do, so when they wear them it's to look se..saxy...OH, sex-"
Your lips were swiftly sealed shut by magic, its originator's face burning red.
"L-listen Anon, if you super duper absolutely without any backsys promise to not say ANYTHING about my...privet books or what you read in them to your mom, or anypony really but especially your mom, I'll buy you whatever ice cream you want from Swirl Top's right now, okay?"
You nod up and down as fast as you can, your lips still being sealed. Sighing Twilight releases your lips and picks up Spike to put him on her back, him now having torn a few good holes in your sock by now.
"Alright, let's get going then. I think I could use some ice cream myself."
"YEAH!" you yell excitedly as the three of you get ready to go out.
Fifteen Minutes Later
Your trio was now walking down the street, you enjoying a quad chaco attack double scoop ice cream cone, Twilight a simple one scoop vanilla cone, and Spike a small crystal you had picked up from a nearby jewelry store.
As you enjoy your frozen delight a thought popped into your head. You haven't tried asking Twilight yet if she knew what mom was doing.
"Hey, Twilight?"
Taking one more lick from her ice cream Twilight looked over at you.
"Yes, Anon?"
"Do you know why Mom's been so busy? She being a poopoo head and not telling me why she's being all secrety."
"SECRETIVE is the word I think you're looking for and I don't have the slightest clue~"
The way she said that, the way she's turned her eyes to look away from you!
"You DO know something!"
"Nope, don't have a clue."
"Tell me tell me tell me!"
"There's nothing to tell."
Twilight began to walk a little faster, you in turn having to speed up too. You could see a grin starting to spread across her muzzle.
"Come on Twiliiiiiiight, everypony's been all quiet about what mom's been doing, but you're my U.B.S.B.F.F., so you HAVE to tell me!"
"And with you as my U.L.B.B.F.F. (Unofficial little brother best friend forever) I would tell what you what it is Celestia's been doing-"
A glimmer of hope and excitement flashed in your eyes.
"-If I knew."
"AAAAUGH!"
Twilight giggled, popping the last bite of ice cream cone in her mouth before walking even faster, making sure that Spike was held down securely by her magic so he'd wouldn't fall off.
"You're being just as big a meanie as mom! And why are you walking so fast?!"
You were pouting by this point. You would have crossed your arms to complete the picture but you were pretty much lightly jogging at this point to keep up with Twilight.
"I'm not walking fast, you're walking slow."
She sped up more after saying that. You were really getting mad now.
"Where are we even going now, we missed the turn to get to your tower three blocks ago!"
That's when Twilight looked you right in the eyes with her tongue out and a wink.
"Wouldn't you like to know?"
And before you knew it she had magicked up a seat belt out of nowhere to hold Spike to her back before breaking off at a full run, laughing down the street as you tried to catch up.
"H-HEY! TWILIGHT!!!"
You start running as fast as your stubby legs can take you. Being a human you had a natural advantage when it came to running, but only being six meant that advantage only extended to other six-year-olds and some out of shape seven-year-olds. Twilight took the lead by a long shot keep a good distance between the two of you.
As you chased her you noticed she was never too far ahead of you, slowing down if you got really behind. She also made sure you had caught up some before turning corners, essentially meaning you were never out of sight, all the while Spike is just having the time of his life riding around.
Eventually you saw the castle entrance coming into view after about ten minutes of following her.
"TWILIGHT, PLEASE STOP, YOU KNOW MOM'S TOO BUSY FOR US TO GO RUNNING THROUGH THE CASTLE!"
She doesn't even acknowledge you as she nods to the guards while running past them. They nod back and immediately open the doors for her. Pausing to catch your breath just outside the still open doors you glare at the pair, both of whom had the smallest of smiles. it fills you with a child's rage.
"Tell me your secrets!" You yell with a finger pointed between the two of them.
They both come to attention and salute.
"We are simply following orders from you mother, your young highness. We are prohibited from speaking any further on the matter."
Rolling your eyes you run past them.
"You're jerks!"
They just smile again and close the doors behind you as you start to run around the castle looking for Twilight and Spike. It doesn't take long as you spot her in the main hall leading to the ballroom. The second you come around the corner she gives you a raspberry and Spike waves at you with infant nativity before she practically leaps through the door with a giggle. Groaning you follow. When you reach the door you waste no time and enter the room.
"Alright Twilight, I'm done with runn-"
"SURPRISE!"
You are nearly blown back by the sudden amount of voices. Looking around you find that you're surrounded by ponies. There's nearly your entire class from school, all of your friends, some of the castle staff you had befriended, of course Twilight and Spike, and mom.
"Happy birthday Anonymous!"
With that final cheer all the kids from your class tackle hug you in one big swarm, you laughing uncontrollably as they all wished you a happy birthday of their own. A few moments later you manage to break free from the convergence of children and go over to your family. You run right up to your mom and hug her legs.
"This is what you were being all secrety-I mean, secretive about!"
Hugging you back Celestia nuzzles the top of your head.
"It wouldn't be all that good of a surprise birthday party if I hadn't been secrety about now would it?"
Detaching from the hug you look over to Twilight, who was grinning like a mad mare, Spike trying to reach one of the many pastries strewn about various tables from her back.
"I guess not, but did you really have to make me chase around the city to get me here? I mean come on Twilight, my legs are too stubby for that!"
"Sorry~, but I thought it would be fun to make you work for it a little. It's not my fault you don't ever exercise properly."
"Like you do? You never leave your room if you don't have to!"
"Actually, I've been getting up early every day since Celestia told me about the party just so I could outrun you." She said this with a smirk.
Frustrated you just about let it go and go enjoy the party when an idea hits you.
A mean idea.
An evil, downright despicable idea.
Grin devious, you motion for mom to bring her head down towards you. When she does you whisper in her ear. Twilight looks on confused when-
"You found WHAT under her bed?!"
Face burning like a fire Twilight yells the first thing to enter her brain.
"Anonymous!"
"Twilight Sparkle!" Was the retort as Celestia looked down upon her with a motherly anger that made every kid in the room lock up.
"SpIka!" Was Spike's response as he thought they were all playing a game where you yelled a name.
You had snickered then, but as it would turn out later because you had read those books your mom had thought there was no point in waiting anymore and that night gave you "The Talk".
You didn't sleep that night, even with your awesome new enchanted perfect temperature blanket you got as a gift. With Twilight getting a different but just as harrowing talk about being a growing mare and her punishment for letting you see those books you both decided to forget the whole thing and call it a truce.
Spike got to eat two whole slices of cake, so at least one of the three of you came out unscathed.
Lesson to be learned: If you have one, hide your copy of "(Censored)" really good.
