Anal-Retentive

by MegatronsPen

First published

Flash Sentry and Twilight Sparkle are going at it in secret, hoping that their first time together would be something special and everything either pony ever hoped for. Until Twilight Sparkle takes something Flash says completely the wrong way.

Twilight Sparkle never thought this day would come.

Tonight, she is going to join together with the love of her life; Flash Sentry, body and soul...

Unfortunately, Flash Sentry opens his big mouth and ruins everything through a simple misunderstanding Twilight Sparkle quickly blows way out of proportion.

((WARNING! A very short, very random comedy clop. Not much sense to be found here. If you are expecting quality clop you need to back away, very slowly. Slower. Slooooower...))

((Picture was found: HERE!))

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Twilight Sparkle never thought this day would come.

The mere concept that she would give herself; heart and soul to any stallion was once a silly notion she had entertained with her friends during their various sleepovers throughout the years, without a single ounce of honesty to her claim that she would like to try and have sex with whatever flavor of the month Rarity entertained the girls with at the time.

Much to Applejack’s despair, the girls even once talked about having sex with her big brother, Big Macintosh. There was even a spell where the tables were turned on Twilight and that her brother; Prince Shining Armor, was the flavor of the week for their fantasies.

Although, no matter how much she laughed, smiled and said she would happily allow each suggestion made (with the exclusion of Shining of course) to rut her silly, the truth was...

No, she wouldn't.

With any of them.

Although logical, calculating and very bookwormish, like any mare, Twilight Sparkle too aspired for romance, but only with the right pony she believed that was right for her.

And then she met him.

The one.

Or rather, two versions of him.

Twilight Sparkle settled with the pony version considering cross-dimensional boyfriends would be quite a difficult feat to pull off.

Their relationship was enacted in secret, more so due to the fact he was after all her personal bodyguard of sorts whenever she stayed at Canterlot Castle.

Flash Sentry was the stallion that stood waiting outside of her room in the late hours of the evening, forever vigilant against intruders and other such annoyances.

However, on this particular night, Twilight Sparkle had other plans.

Tonight? She had planned to give herself to him entirely.

Tonight they would consummate their love under Luna’s moonlight with the threat of being discovered looming over their heads without a care in the world.

Removing all of his armor was somewhat of an issue, so he removed what was only necessary for him to rut his cock in and out frantically of the moaning mare to which he mounted from behind, each pony locked in a state of their own personal bliss.

Haaaah~F-Flash… I-I never thought sex would feel this good...” Twilight moaned as she struggled to keep up both her own and Flash’s weight that bared down upon her, her hips almost bucking somewhat with each bone shattering thrust the stallion produced.

“Y-yeah, Twi’, this is… this is amazing. You’re amazing,” Flash Sentry grunted, sweat lining his brow as he felt his head droop down to nibble against the back of her neck, “I-I can’t believe we’re doing this in the castle.”

“Harder, Flash, d-do it harder.” Twilight whispered in her excitement, her eyes rolling back in her head as he complied with her wishes, absorbing every inch of him into body that filled a spot she had longed to fill with his cock.

Licking his dry lips, Flash Sentry quickly cast a worried glance as he looked towards Twilight’s bedroom door, noting the shadows passing along the crack beneath the door from the brightly lit hallway beyond.

“S-someone’s outside…” Flash slowed his thrusts, ready to pull out.

“I-I don’t care, just don’t stop.” Twilight shook her head, whispering back, tossing a needy stare back at him that immediately caught his attention. “I’m almost there.”

He resumed, naturally, feeling a touch of excitement flare up at the mere prospect that somepony might be listening or worse, would walk in on them going at it like rabbits.

Twilight was sure she would never have sex this amazing for the rest of her life. Considering it was her first time, it barely even hurt. But then again, when you are as prepared as Twilight Sparkle who had planned the entire event out, you make sure you bring enough lubrication with you when you know how big your stallion’s cock is.

Flash Sentry was WAY above average, if her studies on that particular of the anatomy were anything to go by. She had figured a little bit of help would go a long way in making their special night go as smoothly as the penis gliding in and out of her effortlessly.

The mare was triumphant. Her hard work had paid off.

Now all she needed to do was to make him ejaculate; preferably not inside of her, even if she had placed a magical contraceptive spell upon herself and a condom on him before the act even started.

Twilight was taking no chances. There was just no time for her to fit a foal amongst her busy schedule.

For Flash Sentry, it was at this point in every stallion’s life when bedding the mare of their dreams that certain things started to take effect.

Aside from an overactive imagination and the fear of being caught, other, more stupid ideas come to mind.

For example, his eyes trailed down noting the tight pucker of Twilight’s anus staring right back at him.

In his delusion, he could had sworn his mind had fashioned a disembodied voice for that part of Twilight’s anatomy… and it said only one thing.

Put your cock in me.

He had heard anal sex was just as good if not better in terms of just how tight that particular organ would feel around his heavily lubricated cock. He had heard the orgasm from from the squeeze was mind-blowing.

“Y-you…” Flash Sentry kept his eyes locked on Twilight’s anus as he spoke, huffing between each word. “Wanna…?”

Hahh~h-huh?” Twilight moaned as she tried with all of her might to look back at him.

Flash Sentry grunted as he felt his climax reaching its edge. He teetered on the brink as he clenched his eyes shut. “You… t-try…”

“W-what?” She couldn’t quite get what was getting at over his increasing grunts.

“You—anal.” He moaned as he felt Twilight Sparkle's innards squeeze around his cock. "Haah, yeah."

As if his hopes and dreams were yanked from under him like a carpet, Flash Sentry felt his body fall forward and his cock slip out of Twilight Sparkle as she suddenly moved away from under him, turning about as her wings fluttered angrily at her sides.

As the mare turned about, Flash Sentry noted; completely confused at this point mind you, that Twilight Sparkle’s face was red not because of the sexual activity to which technically did fluster her previously; oh no, that was a different kind of red. She was PISSED and Flash Sentry could tell almost immediately.

What did you just call me?”

Dumbfounded, Flash Sentry simply stood there, whining as he felt his orgasm slip away. “I-I—wha?”

“Did you call me anal?” Twilight Sparkle scrunched her eyebrows together, looking upon him with a measure of hurt.

“Well, yes—no! Th-that’s not what I meant, Twi’, I—”

“J-Just because I like to make sure things are well-planned in advance does not mean you can just call me anal-retentive in the middle of what I thought was going to be a special moment between us!” With the mood successfully slaughtered, Twilight Sparkle’s voice drew loud, much to Flash Sentry’s alarm.

Clearly she had taken what he said in the entirely wrong way. He knew how paranoid she could be and this was something that her friends and warned him about in the past. Although, he had yet to see it.

So why did it chose to rear its ugly yet beautiful head now?

Flash Sentry needed to say something before she got them both in trouble. “That’s not what I—”

“Is it because I made you wear a condom? Is it because I used too much lubrication; is it because I brought lubrication?” Twilight listed off queries.

No! No, that’s not—”

Twilight gave him no quarter to speak as she continued, building herself up into a rage as she did so. “I-I know I can be a bit orderly and I know I can be a bit fussy about how things are planned out and how they're supposed to be! You know what? I even specifically chose this time of night because the guard’s patrol patterns don’t often pass by here frequent enough to notice you have been gone from your post for any measure of time! Every half an hour to be exact! That should had been plenty of time for us to finish but now you have gone and ruined it by insult me!"

"Whoa! I said no such—"

"I am sorry if my anal-repetitiveness bothers you but it is a part of who I am!"

Twilight!” Flash Sentry lifted a hoof, looking back from between her and the door. “Lower your voice; you’re going to get us in trouble!”

Twilight Sparkle stomped a hoof angrily. “Do NOT tell me to be quiet! You know what? I am sorry I tried to orchestrate this whole thing! I’m sorry I tried to make sure this night was special for both of us!!!” Tears flowed from her eyes as she broke off towards the bedroom doors in a gallop, throwing them open magically with a wave of her horn.

Flash Sentry turned about, unable to say a word. His mouth moving like a fish out of water.

While in the brightly lit hallway, Twilight Sparkle spun about to glare at him through her tears just as two guards appeared besides the Princess, evidently flustered as they had bolted in the general vicinity to discover what all the noise was about.

Both of the stallions face faulted when they had noticed Flash Sentry’s particularly interesting predicament hanging between his legs and the Princess’s next to near, despair filled woes.

YOU CAN FINISH YOURSELF OFF! WE'RE NEVER HAVING SEX, EVER AGAIN!”

SLAM!

Flash Sentry stood unable to speak as the door was slammed shut.

After several moments alone, Flash Sentry simply lifted a brow as he whined pathetically again. “B-but... this isn't fair!”