Patient Pinkie

by Miss Sugar-Pink

First published

Pinkie drinks a potion for Twilight's experiment, but strange things start to happen - to everypony. Or is it everybody now?

Pinkie drinks a potion for Twilight's experiment. Twilight asks her to keep a journal of events for what happens - and what happens surely is a doozy!
And by a doozy, I mean a massive human in equestria twist.

Entry One

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Entry One

Heya! It’s me, Pinkie Pie! Oh, but you already knew that. I guess?

Sorry for the confusion! This is my first time keeping a diary! Or, well, one I’m going to be working on for more than one day. I have trouble staying on topic with these and then I get distracted and then it just gets all wonky! Tee hee. Wonky’s a funny word.

Oo, you know what else is a funny word? KUMQUAT!

Oh! There I go, getting off topic again!

Well, I’m supposed to write about important stuff here! See, Twilight just asked me to drink some potion stuff she made! It tasted ICKY! Bleck! She should really start adding sugar to those potions of hers. Mmm… Sugar Potions. I should tell her about that when I can next talk to her!

In any case, it’s supposed to do something to my mane! Honestly I wasn’t really paying much attention. Maybe it’ll make it cotton candy and then I can eat it! Oh, but if I ate it, I wouldn’t have any hair left!

Oh, that’s right! She made me drink two potions - one for mane loss and one to make me lose my mane! She said the two should counteract each other. And since I’m a-okay with wearing a fancy smancy wig, I said ‘Righty-o, Twilight’!

So now Twilight wants me to write a journal each day to ‘document any changes’. So that’s what I’m going to do!

Oh! That little beepy machine just went beep! Is that a change? Oh! And my tail just twitched! That’s a change too! And Twilight just fell down the stairs (I guess that’s why my tail twitched - she fell!) and that’s a change too! Teehee, this is really easy! Oh, and now Twilight’s walking over, and now she’s reading over my shoulder, and now she got a quill and some ink and now she’s wr

I’m sorry to interrupt this journal, but it appears Pinkie needs this in writing: for future reference, any changes that are documented here should be relevant to your condition, Pinkie. That is to say, any hair loss, changes in body or thoughts, excessive hyperness that doesn’t fit your normal levels of hyperness, ect. ect. Everything you would see on a normal warning label on potions. You don’t need to document everything about your surroundings, Pinkie.

HA! Twilight took my journal just to write that! And she even used a really pretty ink color just so we can separate the two lines! I really like my buddy, she’s so smart like that! Oh, but I need to ask her something.

I asked her why I needed to write this all. She said it was because “science isn’t science unless it’s documented”. Twilight can be silly like that! But because of this, I’ll be writing in you every day, journal! Hmm, what should I call you? Oh, are you a girl or a boy? Or not? Or both? I don’t know! Oh, naming books is so hard!

Ohp! Twilight says I should get going, and she’s totally right! You see, journal, I work at Sugarcube corner and I live there with Mrs. Cake and Mr. Cake and Pumpkin Cake and Pound Cake and my bestest pet friend Gummy!! And I need to get there eventually to help work because I help do parties and serve cupcakes and it’s really really fun and nice!

Well, I have to say goodbye now journal! HEY! Your name can be Jay! Jay the Journal! Teehee! Well, I’ll be back to talk to you after work, Jay Jay! Hopefully that won’t be too long! I don’t think it will, but it might if the kids are being really unagreeable today!

Oh no, Twilight’s taking my quill bye bye Jay see you later journ

Entry Two

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Heya again, Jay!! It’s after work now! Twilight seemed surprised to see me again until I explained that I wanted to talk to you again. She thinks I don’t quite get how to keep a sciency journal. I told her I needed you again, though, in case anything new happened! She couldn't answer me after that, so she gave me you to keep!! Isn't that awesome?!

Although, she said I have to check in with her every single day! That's not too bad, though, cause I like seeing my bestest buddy!

I'm looking forward to talking to you more, Jay. It will be nice to make a new friend - and you're extra new to me, cause you're a book! I've never been friends with a book before! I'll have to throw a party: a 'my best friend's a book' party! Twilight will probably like that one.

Yaaaaawn. It's pretty late now though! I worked aaaaall day. Those twins really wear me out. I love them a bunch, though!

I'm going to hide you in my dresser so Gummy doesn't eat your pages. He likes to do that! I think that's how he likes to read, but he can't read you.

Oh! And there's been no changes yet.

Goodnight, Jay!

Entry Three

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Good morning JJ! I got a really good night’s rest. I thought it would be a good idea to write in you first thing, every day! I hope that’s okay with you, and that I’m not waking you up or anything. I would hate to wake you up from your sleep if you need it! Just don’t stay up too late, JJ, cause that ends with dark circles under your eyes and then it’s just a big mess!

It’s an absolutely beautiful day outside! It’s starting to turn into summer now, so the sun is shining and it’s pretty and everything! And there’s also butterflies flying around and pretty birdies chirping and just a lot of pretty beautiful stuff. I hope Equestria is always beautiful like that!

Anyways, there’s no changes today either! So far, Twilight’s potions haven’t done anything. I think that’s what she was aiming for, but it’s really boring. I kinda hope something happens! Could you imagine if something really crazy happened? Like, what if my mane turned brown, or if I started shedding or i

WOAH

Jay, I just got the BIGGEST DOOZY! I’ve only had one once before, back when Twilight first realized that my Pinkie Sense was too random for her big sciency brain to understand! This one was WAY bigger though! Like, that last one was really big because she learned something super important about our friendship which is super important to me too, but this one is HUGE!!!! This is WHOLE WORLD big!

Oh, what do I do? I should go tell Twilight, I think! But what if she gets freaked out and scared? Oh, I hate when she feels like that! When my friends are worried and everything, it makes it so much harder to make them smile!

I think I should tell her anyways, though. Twilight always likes to know what’s going on. Whenever she doesn’t, stuff comes as a surprise to her, and she doesn’t like that. Well, sometimes she does - like that time I threw her that great big surprise party for her birthday! She LOVED that! But she doesn’t like it when stuff that could change the world happens as a surprise.

I LOVE surprises myself. I can feel this one is gonna be fun too.

Alright, Jay! I gotta hurry! If I run, I might be able to catch her just as she finishes making her first checklist of the day! Byebye, Jay!