Size Matters
With the sudden "roar" of the cymbals, Discord's "creative outlet" hour started once again, soon followed by the electric guitar, base and other instruments Fluttershy couldn't even fathom. Despite Discord's "magical" sound-proofing the madness of his music pierced the walls at a level that was enough to make you wonder what he was doing inside . Twilight had suggested that he get a hobby, something that would lessen his chaotic outbursts. Discord had clearly stated that chaos was in his "character", whatever that meant, and not causing some mild chaos bottled in that feeling of suppression he felt when he was in stone imprisonment.
Now, Fluttershy had no objections, it only took a few hours a week, and Fluttershy could regulate those hours well enough as to not disturb her little critters. But still, every time Discord isolated himself from the world she wondered what the hell he was doing. "Curiosity killed the cat." said a little voice in her mind, and she really wondered if it was right to even ask Discord. He had stated, somewhat embarrassed, that it was immature ; that it was stupid, silly even. Fluttershy knew that many "artists" didn't like seeing their work publicly posted before they could muster the confidence to show it to the world. She wondered if indeed this was the case.
Maybe a little peek wouldn't hurt... it couldn't possibly be THAT bad... right? Right? The first rehearsal over, Fluttershy decided to put her plan into motion.
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Discord's magic was clearly unique. Instruments coming alive to service him was only a fragment of what he could do. It was, however, a nightmare to deal with inanimate objects coming to life. They always had an existential crisis if you let them live for too long.
...
"Wait... you mean to tell me that people ‘kiss’ and ‘blow’ me to play music? That I'm a musical whore?" Said the saxophone. Discord facepawed, why did he bother explaining to the instruments what they were? He knew what would happen if he tried. It was all Twilight's fault... spend a lot of time with someone too caught up in logic and you start questioning and doubting your own.
...
He never made a saxophone come to life again. Lost as he was in his thoughts he barely noticed the tiny shift of the wind as the door silently opened and closed. Shrugging at the barely noticeable change, he did a quick check over the instruments that were blabbering about what cords would fit better in the second chorus.
"Alright listen up y'all..." Damn I'm starting to sound like Applejack. Bah, these ponies are getting too much under my skin! "... We are not changing the script to my masterpiece! Now fall in line and let's rock!" Fortunately, it didn't take long for those crazy buffoons to fall back to the chaotic order he had imposed on them. Because let's not forget that "There is order in Chaos." oh yes... even "chaos" must have a pattern no matter how crazy it is. So long as it changes after a time, of course.
The drums roared, the electric guitar screamed, and the music started with a wild rhythm with Discord entering soon after. Little did he know that Fluttershy had sneakily hidden herself behind some of the inactive electronics in the corner,. Two blue eyes were peeking out her hiding spot as her ears perked up.
Discord was...
"With my BrandNewFucking penis
The ponies i'll be enslaaaaaving
My awesome phallic statue
Mares will be bowing to!
Before my BrandNewFucking penis
Nations will be surreeeendering
With penis... and Fire! Equestria goes on up higher!
With my BrandNewFucking penis
Harems i'll be ploooowing
Twohundredandseventytwo mares
And Celestia
It won't even be needed, for me to enslaaaave them
They'll be applying...
Vo-lun-ta-ri-ly!
I want - Like a beast it will be roaring
I want - Before it my subjects to bow!
I want - Black holes for it to be fucking!
Before its' size you're gagging
With my BrandNewFucking penis
Luna's Moon i'll be coloniiiizing
I won't even need... mares to be fucking!
It's so powerful...
That rocks it will be pieeeercing
And so fertile, that it'll be impregnate them too!
With my BrandNewFucking penis
Galaxies i'll be building!
And supernova explosions i'll be u-using!
My fucking frozen balls...
The winter i'll be waaaarming
Because the cold makes them shrink
And they cause a rupture I the time-space continuum!
I want - Like a beast it will be roaring
I want - Before it my subjects to bow!
I want - Black holes for it to be fucking!
Before its' size you're gagging!
I want - Like a beast it will be roaring
I want - Before it my subjects to bow!
I want - Black holes for it to be fucking!
Before its' size you're gagging."
Fluttershy was speechless. That was the least one could say. She slowly got out of her hiding spot. When Discord spotted her, he froze. It was like they both had been slapped, with a chair, in the face.
The first one that spoke was Fluttershy. "Well... that was... fun I guess? Uhmmm... the music was... nice... but the lyrics..." She simply fainted. This was too much for her to take.
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A week later Celestia received a letter from Twilight. Once she opened it, everything in her mind froze. Her expression was unreadable as thousands of thoughts passed through her head.
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Almost immediately after sending the letter, Twilight received a hastily sealed one with magic unknown to her. It was written upon it that it could be read only by Discord. Once Discord was called in, his head hanging down, ashamed, she gave the letter to him. Discord opened it. It only had two lines written upon it.
"You. Me. My place now! Let's discuss an interesting new revelation."