Pinkie and Derpy, trolling FTW
It was a normal day Ponyville. Or so it seemed. In Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie was just waking up. "Good morning Ponyville. Now where is Gummy?" Pinkie asked. "Here you are! Today is the day we will completely destroy the 4th wall! That way be able to have even more characters to party with! Where to start? I know! Come along Gummy, we have a wall to break!" Gummy jumped into Pinkie's pink, fluffy hair. Pinkie went downstairs.
Downstairs, the Cakes were baking muffins. "Hello Mr. And Mrs. Cake. Can I help make muffins?" said Pinkie.
"Well sure dear," said Mrs. Cake. Suddenly, 20 muffins of each flavor appeared on the counter.
"You’re welcome!" said Pinkie. The Cakes looked at each other.
"Pinkie, how did you do that?" said Mr. Cake.
"It took a few episodes to learn, a season to perfect, and this fanfic to use!" Pinkie said gladly. The Cakes looked at each other again, clearly confused and a bit scared. Pinkie saw this and replied, "Don't worry! The muffins are safe and no, I didn't use dark magic. Anyways, I have to get going! I have a wall to break!" Leaving the Cakes scratching their heads, Pinkie went outside and walked down the street.
As Pinkie was walking, Derpy happened to cross her way. "Hello Pinkie," said Derpy. "What are you doing?"
"Oh me? I trying to break the 4th wall once and for all so that I can have more characters to party with!" stated Pinkie, expecting Derpy not to understand. But to Pinkie's surprise, Derpy did know what she was doing.
"You can break the 4th wall, too? I thought I was alone in being able to do that!" said Derpy. "Can I help? I should be done delivering mail in a few seconds."
"Sure! Met me here when you are done," said Pinkie, glad to have help. With that Derpy disappeared and popped up in a zig zag around the block, putting mail in mailboxes. This only took 1 second. Then she disappeared and delivered mail to last few blocks before appearing next to Pinkie 3 seconds later. "Oh, I never tried teleporting before! Derpy, show me how to do that!" said Pinkie excitedly.
"Simple 4th wall breaking, really," stated Derpy.
"Ok. I'll try," said Pinkie. Pinkie then found herself on the other side of town. She went back to Derpy. "Wow. It really is simple!" said Pinkie. "What else can you do?"
Derpy replied, "Anything this fanfic lets me!" Both ponies heard a crack.
"It's working!" cried Pinkie. "Derpy, met me at Rainbow Dash's cloud house in 5 seconds, okay?" With that Pinkie and Derpy disappeared. Pinkie, however, appeared at an empty field and suddenly gained wings. She then teleported to Rainbow Dash's house.
Rainbow Dash was practicing tricks when she saw Pinkie and Derpy at her cloud house. Rainbow Dash flew over to them and said, "Hi Derpy, hi Pinkie. What are you-" Rainbow Dash noticed that Pinkie was on a cloud. Once more, Pinkie had wings! They looked like she always had them! They weren't the butterfly wings like Rarity had when Twilight gave her temporary wings. They were real pegasus wings! "Pinkie! You have wings!" Rainbow Dash shouted with joy!
Pinkie replied in a matter-of-fact voice, "Yea. I do."
' Why isn’t Pinkie more excited?' thought Rainbow Dash. "Pinkie, how did you get them? I mean earth ponies don't suddenly turn into pegasi," asked Rainbow Dash.
Pinkie answered back, "Like this!" Poof, a horn appeared on her head.
"How-w, what?! You are now an Alicorn! I don't understand!" said the surprised and confused Rainbow Dash.
"It's easy!" was Rainbow Dash's answer from Pinkie. Then Pinkie turned red, then orange, now yellow, green, blue, purple, pink, and the cycle started all over again! A few cycles later Pinkie disappeared.
Rainbow Dash remembered Derpy was here. "Is it me, or did Pinkie turn into an Alicorn, change color, then disappear?" asked the worried pony.
"Yes. That was real! By the way, tell me if I gain a horn," said Derpy in a unsurprised tone. As soon as Derpy said that, half of a horn appeared on her head. "Did it work, Rainbow Dash?" asked Derpy.
"Sort-of; you only have half a horn." Rainbow Dash was starting to get a bit scared.
"Well that is better than nothing! See you Rainbow Dash!" And with that, Derpy disappeared. Rainbow Dash went to bed, thinking she was just tired and was half dreaming. But before she fell asleep, she heard a crack.
Derpy and Pinkie appeared outside Fluttershy's cottage. Although, in their normal states. "Ok Derpy, don't go too crazy. Fluttershy is easily frightened," said Pinkie. Derpy nodded. "Ok. Now then, you know what we have to do, right?" asked Pinkie.
Derpy replied, "Of course!" The ponies found Fluttershy inside about to feed the animals.
"Hi Fluttershy!" said Pinkie.
"Hello Pinkie. Hello Derpy. I was just about to feed the animals. Do you want to help? I mean, if it is alright with you," said Fluttershy in her soft, kind, voice.
Pinkie replied, "We would love to!" With that, a tray of cupcakes appeared in Pinkie Pie's hooves. Fluttershy got a little surprised, so Derpy made a tray of muffins appear SLOWLY in her hooves. Though this still scared Fluttershy. But she calmed down when she saw the animals eating the treats, and clearly enjoying them.
"Um Pinkie, Derpy, how DID you make those treats seemingly appear out of thin air?" asked Fluttershy.
Derpy and Pinkie replied in almost perfect unison, "We just did!" Although Pinkie explained, "There really is no better way to explain it than that."
But there was a better way of explaining it, though they don't want to tell anyone. You see, both Pinkie and Derpy knew that the truth hurt. The reason they don't go crazy, is because they already are crazy. Derpy is too, well, derpy to fully take it in, well Pinkie is almost always happy, so she can shrug it off.
"Well good bye Fluttershy! Also, a warning, this may startle you, so brace yourself!" said Pinkie. A second later, both Derpy and Pinkie disappeared.
Fluttershy, being the pony that she is, jumped behind a tree the exact moment she saw them disappear. "Oh my, I think I should see if Rainbow Dash saw anything like that, because I'm not sure if that was real," said Fluttershy. As Fluttershy flew towards Rainbow Dash's cloud house, she heard a crack, which, of course startled her.
Next up was Twilight. Pinkie knew this was going to be easy. If something is unexplainable, Twilight freaks out. Like when she first found out about Pinkie's 'Pinkie sense'. 'What to do... it has to be original and funny,' thought Pinkie.
"I have an idea Pinkie!" said Derpy.
"Derpy, how did you know what I was thinking?" said Pinkie.
Derpy replied, "There is a reason why my eyes are so derpy. They are pointed in a way so I can see the text in fanfictions and ahead in the episodes, while still seeing what is going on in Equestria! Only problem is, my eyes are stuck this way. I also can't always remember what I see. Now my idea, uh. I forgot it. Sorry Pinkie."
"Never mind that, I have a new idea! Derpy, I want you to reply to Twilight's thoughts as I do some tricks! Got it?" asked Pinkie.
Derpy replied, "Of course!"
Inside, Twilight was reading a book on strange noises because she keep hearing a weird cracking noise(the sound of the fourth wall breaking, but of course she didn't know that). That's when she heard someone knocking on her door. When Twilight opened the door, she found Pinkie Pie and Derpy. "Hi Twilight!" said Pinkie. "I want to show you some cool tricks I learned how to do!"
"Um, sure Pinkie," said Twilight. ' Why did she bring Derpy, though?' thought Twilight.
"For me to help her!" said Derpy. Before Twilight could respond to this, Pinkie started the "show". Pinkie grew wings, then shrunk, then lost her wings, grew a horn, and more.
' How is she doing this! It isn't possible! ' thought the jaw dropped pony.
Derpy replied, "If I told you how she does this, you will likely go crazy. And of course it is possible! She's doing it right now!"
"And how are you reading my mind?! There has to be a scientific explanation for this!" Twilight started rampaging through her library for a explanation. Pinkie knew that they hit her, and signaled for Derpy to go to Rarity's fashion shop. As Twilight was looking everywhere for a book to explain what Pinkie and Derpy just did, she caught a glimpse of them disappearing. "Spike! Help me find a book on unusual magic!" shouted Twilight. Then she heard the crack noise again.
***
Fluttershy just arrived at Rainbow Dash's cloud house. She knocked on the door. "Dash? You in there?" asked Fluttershy.
"What?" was Rainbow Dash's response.
"I need to ask you something. It has to do with Pinkie Pie and Derpy..." said Fluttershy.
Rainbow Dash stormed out of her house. "Don't tell they messed with you, too! I didn't believe it at first, but now I know something is up! We need to go to Twilight right now!" The two ponies took off to Twilight's house, both equally frightened.
***
Outside Rarity's fashion shop, Pinkie and Derpy were discussing how they should mess with Rarity. "I say we make a dress out of muffin dough then put it on Rarity! Then we eat some of it off her, then bake the rest into muffins. Then sit down with Rarity and enjoy the magical food that is muffins!" said Derpy.
Pinkie replied, "Too crazy! And kind of weird, too. Let's make a dress so beautiful that Rarity will faint!" After talking back and forth, they finally agreed on something. What? I'm not going to tell you right now! That spoils the surprise!
Anyways, Derpy and Pinkie walked into the Carousel Boutique. Rarity looked up from her work. "Hello Pinkie. Hello Derpy. Not to be rude, but I am kind of busy so can we make this quick?"
"Sure! Me and Derpy here are planning on making a big party, and we need good host outfits. Mine will be pink and purple and Derpy's yellow and grey. Got that?" Pinkie smiled.
"Right on it Pink-" was all Rarity got before she looked down at the dress she had been making. It had turned pink and grey from its old blue and green! Rarity screamed. "Oh no! I was working on that dress for weeks! Now all down the drain! How could this have happened?! If Sweetie Bell is pranking me I’ll-"
"I don't know what you mean! That dress is the same color that it was when we came in. Also, I found a dress that would fit me great!" interrupted Derpy. Rarity looked down. The dress was back to normal. She looked at the dress Derpy picked. It was the dress she had been working on for a fashion contest. But instead of the beautiful reds and blues, it was instead dull grey and bright yellow. And the gems were now tiny muffins.
"H-how are you girls d-doing t-this?" asked Rarity, clearly very scared.
"Hey Rarity, does this look good on me?" asked Pinkie. She was wearing the dress that was also being made for a fashion show. It had been the twin dress to the one Derpy was holding up. It had undergone a very similar transformation. Only this one was pink and purple and the gems had become mini cupcakes. "Oh. Sorry, we need to make this quick. We'll hope you can get our dresses ready soon. See ya," said Pinkie. At those words, Pinkie and Derpy disappeared, with their dresses they had been wearing/holding falling down and turning back to normal. Rarity fainted. At the same time, there was a crack noise.
***
Rainbow Dash crashed into(and through) the Library. Inside Twilight was searching for frantically for a book on unusual magic. "Twilight!! Pinkie Pie is doing some really weird and impossible stuff!" shouted Rainbow Dash as Fluttershy opened the front door and ran in.
"How did they do that?! How?!" asked Twilight, not noticing Dash and Fluttershy.
"TWILIGHT!!" yelled Dash. Twilight snapped out of her trace."Thank you. Now then, HOW THE HAY IS PINKIE AND DERPY GAINING HORNS AND MAKING MUFFINS AND STUFF APPEAR OUT IF THIN AIR?!!!!" screamed Dash.
"So much for being quiet in a Library," muttered Twilight. "I am trying to find out! Help me find a book titled 'Unexplained and Unusual Magic'."
Pinkie appeared out of thin air, took a book from the shelve, and put on the table saying, "Unexplained and Unusual Magic! That's a good book. I think you were looking for it." Then she disappeared. All three ponies looked at each other.
"Okay then..." said Twilight, flipping to the page on a type of unexplained super magic. "I think this is it! It says 'This form of magic is can be used by any type of pony. The users of this are usually completely insane or crazy. When questioned how they do it, users will normally say one of three things. One, 'It's easy!' Two, 'I just do it!' Or three, which is the most strange, 'If I told you, you would most likely go insane.' This seems to be true, as those who have learned the secret refuse to tell anyone it, and all have gone insane, expect those who are already crazy, weird, or insane. Using this magic, the user can grow horns or wings, change color, makes things appear out of thin air, teleport, ect. Not much other than that is known about it.' Hold on a second, the page is changing. It now says 'You will never know how we do it! That make you mad? Who am I kidding? I know it makes you mad because you know that I can read your mind. How I do it, you will never know. -Derpy' Really? Now they are just egging me on!"
"Wait, Derpy can read your mind?!" asked Dash.
"Yes. Yes I can," came a voice from nowhere particular. It was, Derpy's voice.
***
As the now extremely scared ponies looked for Derpy in the library, Derpy and Pinkie Pie were at Sweet Apple Acres hiding in a bush. Pinkie burst out laughing as Derpy made her voice come out at the library. Derpy suddenly stopped and told Pinkie, "I can't mess with them any more. The story is now focusing on us. And yes, they can't hear me saying this. Plus, shouldn't we be doing Applejack right now?"
"We are waiting for AJ to come back from the market. Wait, here she is now! Get ready," commanded Pinkie, though not in a very commanding way.
Pinkie and Derpy each put baskets under an apple tree and leaned their back hoofs against the same tree. "Pinkie? Derpy? What do y'all think your doing?" asked Applejack.
"Just helping out," said Pinkie as she bucked her tree. But when the apples fell down, they turned into apple pies(in pans, too!).
"Huh?" asked Applejack as she bucked the same tree Pinkie did. The apples stayed apples. "What the hay is going on?"
"Don't leave me out," said Derpy, as she too bucked a tree. This time, the apples became apple-flavored muffins.
Pinkie responded with, "Derpy! I said pies not muffins!"
"But muffins are the most amazing thing in the world! Plus-" Derpy put a muffin in her mouth. "-these are delicious!"
Applejack, now clearly confused, asked, "Not to interrupt your little argument, but WHAT THE HAY IS GOING ON?!!!"
"Simple, silly nilly! We are helping buck apples and making apple treats," said Pinkie, matter-of-factly. "It is much easier to make the treats as the apples fall."
"If I didn't know any better, I would say you are just being Pinkie. But I do know better, and what y'all are doing is not possible!" said AJ. "Besides, I need cider not apple treats!"
Derpy replied, "I just don't know what went wrong. But cider? Right on it!" Derpy turned all but one basket of muffins into barrels of cider. Applejack looked at Derpy like she was a alien. "What? I can't keep a basket of muffins?" asked Derpy.
Applejack shrugged and said, "Whatever. I can't complain, y'all helping me make cider! Even if it is impossible way. But still, how DO y'all turn the apples to cider or pies?"
Pinkie muttered something to herself about something not working. 'Derpy?' Pinkie thought. 'If you can hear me, jump-' Derpy jumped. '-Good. She isn't reacting as much as I hoped. I'm going to take a side line and you freak her out. Got it?'
Derpy nodded. "Making cider? That's easy as muffins! Like this!" Derpy grew a horn.
Applejack, who was tasting the cider Derpy made, spit out cider in surprise. ' What the-' was all Applejack could think before Derpy interrupted with,"Let me finish that thought for you; 'hay is going on?!' You're welcome." Derpy then smiled and disappeared with Pinkie. Applejack freaked out(finally), and ran toward Ponyville.
She then said, "Twilight'll know what y'all did! Something wasn't right about that!"
***
"Okay, what are we going to do about Pinkie and Derpy?" asked Fluttershy. CRACK!! Fluttershy, of course, got startled.
"There it is again! I think that crack has something to do with Pinkie and Derpy," said Twilight. Twilight once again looked through a book on unusual sounds.
"There's no time for that! We need to find those two right now!" argued Dash. "I was thinking maybe Rarity knows where they are."
"Good idea, let's go," said Fluttershy, who was still a bit shaky from the sudden sound.
Pinkie appeared behind them. "Yea! I second that we go to Rarity's Fashion Shop."
"Well I guess that if you, Fluttershy and Pinkie- wait a second!" said Twilight, who relied that Pinkie was in the very room! "Pinkie is here! Catch her!"
But Rainbow Dash passed right through Pinkie as she(Pinkie) said, "Oh Twilight. I thought you were smarter than that! I can teleport, make pasties out of thin air, change the color of dresses, wait, sorry, forget what I said about the dresses. You think that you can just CATCH me? That's as effective as trying to grab a shadow! And you really want to know how I do this? You won't like the truth, but if you really want to hear it, I'll tell you once I'm done brea- I mean with my work!" Pinkie smiled. Rainbow Dash tried to catch Pinkie again but once again went right through her.
"What do want from us?" asked Fluttershy, who was STILL shaky from the crack noise.
Pinkie replied with, "Nothing at all! I wouldn't mess with you but it's more effect at breaking the- I mean more effective at my, uh, work! You know what! How about this, go get Applejack and Raity and try and find me! If you find both me AND Derpy, I'll tell you how I how I do my 'tricks'. We won't leave Ponyville. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Look at time! I have work to do!" With that, Pinkie disappeared.
Twilight ran out the door and towards Raity's house shouting, "I MUST KNOW!! I NEED TO KNOW!! KNOWING WILL EVEN EXPLAIN PINKIE SENSE!! I NEED TO KNOW THE TRICK!!!" Both pegasi flew after her, knowing she was going information crazy for the fifth time this week.
As they two ponies were chasing Twilight, they bumped into Applejack. "I need to see Twilight," said Applejack. "Pinkie and Derpy did some-"
Rainbow Dash interrupted saying, "Pinkie and Derpy messed with us too!" Then Rainbow Dash told Applejack about the current situation.
"We better get going then. If I learned how she does the things she does, I'll be able to buck every apple tree in the farm in a second," stated AJ
"Rarity? You home?" asked Twilight. She soon saw Rarity fainted on the ground.
Pinkie teleported into the room. "By the way, this time doesn't count. I just want to comment on the fact that Raity is still knocked out cold?! All I did was change the color on some dresses then change them back to normal! And I thought Fluttershy was the wimp!" Pinkie facehoofed.
Rarity suddenly woke up. "I SENSE THAT SOMEONE MADE FUN OF ME OR MY DRESSES!!! WHO INSULTED ME?!!" screamed Rarity.
"Very unladylike Rarity. And it was Twilight!" Pinkie then teleported away with a smirk.
"Yea run away Pinkie! Or disappear I guess. You think I can't fake being fainted! I did drama in school! Jokes on you!" shouted Rarity. "Sorry about that Twilight. Now that I scared Pinkie away, what did she mean by 'this time doesn't count'?"
At the very moment, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack ran into the room. "We heard screaming! What happened?" asked Rainbow Dash.
Twilight responded, "Rarity scared away Pinkie. But Pinkie said that this time didn't count towards finding her."
"What do you mean by finding her? What is happening?" asked Rarity, who was confused. Twilight told her the situation. "Well I could use this power for making up the time I lost for making dresses," stated Rarity calmly.
"I want to use it to help buck apples!" said Applejack excitedly.
"I guess I might be able to use to get over my stage fright," stated Fluttershy.
"I could use it take in all the knowledge in every book in Equestria!" shouted Twilight with joy. "What do you want to use it for Rainbow Dash?" Rainbow Dash didn't reply, she kept staring into space. "Rainbow Dash?"
Rainbow Dash got startled. "M-me? Uh, I would use it t-to, u-uh, fly faster. Heh heh," said Dash in tone that a horrible lier would use.
Applejack responded, "Dash? Is there something wrong?"
Rainbow Dash thought for a while, signed, and then said, "No. Let's just get going."
***
As Pinkie and Derpy hid, the Mane 5(Twilight, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Applejack) decided to spilt up. They each had section of Ponyville to search for Pinkie and Derpy in again and again and meet back up at the Library. None of them had found a single trace of both Pinkie and Derpy. "We better start looking again if we want to find Pinkie and Derpy," stated Twilight. They all started to head out again when music started to loudly play. It was, party music?
Then they heard Pinkie's voice in the distance say, "Welcome everypony! Boy do we have a show to put! Right, Derpy?"
"That's right Pinkie! But before we start, we need to wait for our VIPs to come," responded Derpy.
"Pinkie!" the Mane 5 shouted in unison.
They ran towards Town Hall to awaited by Pinkie and Derpy on a stage. Everypony in Ponyville was watching from the crowd. "Hear they are now!" shouted Derpy from the stage.
Pinkie replied, "Looks like they found us! Good game girls. Now I guess I have to tell you how I do stuff like this!" Pinkie changed color to purple, then back to her pink. Pinkie continued. "Well its simple! It’s because we live in a-" CRACK!!! CRACK CRACK!!!! CRAAAACK!!!!
Pinkie looked around, then shrugged. "As I was saying, it’s possible because we all live in a-" But what interrupted Pinkie wasn't a crack, it was the sound of something being ripped. Everypony gasped. There was a huge hole behind Pinkie and Derpy filled with darkness. Pinkie looked confused. "Why do I keep getting interrup-" Pinkie and Derpy started to get sucked into the hole.
The Mane 5 jumped up on stage and tried to stop the hole from sucking up Derpy and Pinkie. Strangely enough, the Mane 5 felt no effect from the hole.
"What the hhhhhaaaaayyy-" Pinkie asked as she got sucked in.
"What in the world of muffffffffffiiiinnnnsss-" Derpy asked as she too got sucked in. The hole closed almost like a zipper.