CIVILIZATION!
The Brothers from Shetland
by 5007
(aka Lord Dragon Claw)
Disclaimer: "My Little Pony" is owned by Hasbro. The "Friendship is Magic" version was designed by the wonderful Lauren Faust. Seeing as how I am neither affiliated with either entity nor do I plan to make money off of this, I will refrain from claiming ownership of any canonical facet of MLP. On the other hand, I will twist canon to my own dark-yet-humorous view for your entertainment. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Chapter One: Civilization! ... or what passes for such.
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"The sun rose late," commented one unicorn to his brother, eyeing the rapidly rising sphere of flame through the canopy.
"That's never happened before. I wonder why it did and if the Summer Solstice had anything to do about it."
He turned his good eye, his left one, to view his traveling companion who had lagged behind again. Limping because of an old injury to his left hind leg, the second unicorn, a dark green coat with a red, slicked-back mane and violet eyes hurried forwards to catch up. His cutie mark was a protractor set at seventy degrees.
"We won't know until we find another settlement, Straet," replied the limping stallion, the upper-half of his horn broken off in a jagged line.
Straet always felt pained when he saw his brother's broken horn - it was his fault that his twin lost his horn and all his spells, save minor telekinesis.
"Straet," admonished the green unicorn when he finally caught up, stepping around some blue-leafed plants. "You had better not be thinking about how my horn broke in that fight with the trinoceros - I keep telling you that I don't blame you."
The first stallion sighed, shaking out his long, unruly dark grey mane that was draped over the right side of his face. "I know, Yuclid, but I haven't forgiven myself for that."
Rolling his eyes, Yuclid shoulder-checked his twin brother, causing the grey-eyed unicorn to go down hard into a mud puddle, dirtying his pale-blue coat and caking his mane. Straet glared at his brother with his one good eye, rubbing his eye patch with the ankle of his hoof.
"If anyone's to blame for anything," began the broken-horned stallion "then I am to blame for the loss of your right eye and ear when that acid viper attacked us."
Straet growled, but picked himself up. "I caused you to lose your magic..."
"And I caused you to lose your depth-perception. And I'm deeply sorry about it, but you've forgiven me."
Yuclid nuzzled Straet's neck with his nose before continuing. "And I've forgiven you for the loss of my horn. We've both found ways around our hardships, but we need to think of the present and the future!"
Straet began leading Yuclid through the forest again. "Right. That's what father always used to say: 'Dwelling on the past blinds you to the present and leaves you vulnerable to the future.'"
"Exactly," agreed the green unicorn. "No more wallowing in regret for you!"
Straet snorted with laughter. "Grandmother's favorite admonition."
Yuclid smiled, glad to see his light blue twin brother was feeling better.
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The brothers began to hear a great, joyous din coming from the distance. It sounded like a celebration of some sort, and where there were celebrations, there were settlements. The brothers hurried towards the sound.
It was not coming from a settlement but from a town outside the reaches of the Everfree Forest, which Yuclid and Straet had never left before. Ever cautious, the brothers decided to observe from a distance. Straet used a telescopic sight spell to view what the commotion was about. Lacking most spells, Yuclid pulled a pair of binoculars he had made from his saddlebag.
To say that they were stunned by the sight of a pair of alicorns in the center of the festival would be an understatement. Having only met other unicorns and earth ponies in their long travels, they were taken aback by the mythic alicorns simply standing there at the center of attention. What they noticed next was that there were many pegasi flying about, helping with the celebrations.
While Straet's brain tried to restart, Yuclid's ever-analytical mind realized that the pegasi, earth ponies, and unicorns were roughly equal in number, but only two alicorns existed in the whole town. What was more, they seemed to be treated like they were elders... maybe even higher-ranked than that. Yuclid put his binoculars away while he processed the information.
"Brother?" began the green unicorn as he quickly calculated a way down.
"Yeah, Yuclid?" responded the blue unicorn, breaking his gaze from the sight of the alicorns and casting a simple feather fall spell on the both of them.
"I think we should camp away from this town for tonight and try to find a way in tomorrow, pending more observation."
"Yeah," replied Straet nervously, having never seen so many ponies in one place before. "Good idea."
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Odd as it was to not have a full amount of sunlight on the Summer Solstice, the sun set on time, making what was supposed to be the longest day of the year last only five hours total - even shorter than the length of the day of Winter Solstice.
They took to the trees, making a small platform out of fallen branches and bent boughs halfway up the canopy to keep out of the reach of the larger predators that tended to prowl the Forest at night. They didn't go higher in the trees because they still needed the cover of the canopy to hide them from the occasional opportunistic dragon that might fly overhead and snatch one of them off of the treetops.
As they settled down for the night, Yuclid took first watch as he always did. As he looked up at the night sky, the moon seemed more vivid. The dark splotch upon its surface that looked like a mare was gone, oddly enough, but it shone more brightly than Yuclid remembered it ever being even accounting for that. Additionally, the stars shined brighter than they had the night before, and he didn't recognize their positions at first due to the fact that there seemed to be twenty percent more stars in the sky, but he quickly figured out the problem when he finally identified Orion's belt.
Not much happened over the course of Yuclid's watch, but he did hear a manticore pride fighting with a pack of dire wolves somewhere in the distance. In the middle of the night, he finally woke Straet up for his watch, pausing long enough to warn him about the increased beauty of the night sky before he settled down onto the cot built into their temporary platform. Straet was similarly confused by the nocturnal skyscape until he identified Polaris, and everything else fell into place.
The sun rose on time that morning, giving a sense of normalcy to the unicorn's heart that relieved him beyond words to describe as the gigantic ball of burning plasma cast a verdant light through the leaves of the forest canopy. He put his hoof gently on Yuclid's flank, barely touching his cutie mark before he pulled his appendage away quickly. The scars from the last time he woke his brother too quickly were faded, but Straet didn't want to have to walk with a cast again if he could help it.
With that gentle touch, Yuclid would wake in a matter of minutes. Straet began collecting tender leaves for them to breakfast on before they tried to enter the town they had seen the day before. Wondering if the ponies of this new town would be anywhere near as snobbish as the earth pony settlement of Brisbray was (they found it last year and didn't even stay a week), Straet slowly munched on his half of the meal.
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The hush of the Everfree Forest was only ever broken by the sounds of predatory creatures (notably apex predators). Many ponies who wandered into the chaotic wood failed to come back out because they knew not the dinner bells they were ringing. The ponies who not only lived but thrived within the expansive Everfree Forest knew when to make sounds and when to be stealthy. They also tended to keep together in their villages and settlements and draw safety from their numbers. Unfortunately, this gave rise to superstitions about outsiders, especially with shapeshifters occasionally trying to prey on young foals.
Hence why when Yuclid and Straet exited the Everfree Forest, they were surprised by the lack of guards at Ponyville's borders. Unless that angry-looking rabbit counted. It bolted when they got close to it, unsurprisingly. What was strange was that it darted inside of a cottage and kicked the door closed. The multitude of animals that hung around the building dived into their own bolt-holes, following the white lagomorph's lead.
The brothers were put on guard when they saw something pink and bouncing heading towards them...
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Twilight Sparkle was very, very excited. Her first full day of living in Ponyville! Yesterday didn't count as she spent most of it fighting Nightmare Moon in the Everfree Forest, and the day before that she had just arrived, but today she was going to live it to the fullest!
Except... what do friends do? She wanted to research it, but then she'd spend hours reading her books. While she considered that as an acceptable way to pass the time, she wouldn't be doing it with friends. And if she didn't get to researching friends soon, Princess Celestia would think she was slacking off! Then SHE'D be banished to the Moon! And-
There was a knock at the door.
"I'll get it!" volunteered Spike, putting down a stack of books.
Twilight had lost her train of thought for the moment. What was she thinking about?
"Oh hi Pinkie Pie!" Spike pleasantly exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"
"Hi Spike! Twilight's still in, isn't she!"
"Well, yes, but-"
"Twilight!" Pinkie exclaimed, barreling past the baby dragon, causing him to spin in place like a top. "I was going to visit Fluttershy when I made an important discovery! There are two new NEW ponies in Ponyville! Do you know what kind of cake they might like!"
"Woah, hold on a second!" the light-purple mare requested. "What does cake have to do with two new ponies?"
"I'm going to throw a party for them, silly!"
Twilight blinked. "Right. How would I know what kind of cake they would like?"
"Well, they're unicorns like you! And they're new!"
"- like me." Twilight shook her head, exasperated. "Look, I don't know anything about them, really. How about you just go with chocolate? Nearly everypony loves chocolate."
"Great idea!" Pinkie agreed before bouncing out of the library at a good clip.
"New ponies, huh?" asked Spike.
"Apparently," replied the unicorn before she turned to the baby dragon. "I'm going to go greet them because Pinkie probably gasped at them like she did to me."
"Yeah, awkward. I'll just continue sorting the books."
"Thank you, Spike."
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Unicorns, more than other kinds of ponies or magical creatures, tend to have a feel for the inherent magic in their surroundings. Whereas the Everfree Forest felt wild, savage, random, Ponyville felt clean, calm, and strong to the twin brothers. The rest of the country of Equestria probably felt that way too.
"We're getting odd looks," whispered the one-eyed unicorn.
"Of course we are," Yuclid whispered back. "We're new and we look like we just spent the past fifteen years in the wild."
"We did spend the past fifteen years in the wild!"
Yuclid smiled in response, prompting the blue pony to frown and narrow his eye.
"I'd appreciate it if you didn't make fun of me in public."
"Not like they can hear us - WE'RE WHISPERING!"
At his shout, many of the ponies of Ponyville gave them a brief look before shrugging and going about their business, being used to a certain pink mare's antics. Straet, on the other hand, growled at his irritating brother. Yuclid chuckled at that.
"You don't seem to be very good at whispering," said a voice above them. They both looked up to see a cyan-blue pegasus with a multicolor mane. "Hi!"
"Well, hello," responded the dark green unicorn. "First time we've ever met a pegasus before. I'm Yuclid."
"Rainbow Dash. I'm in charge of the weather around here."
Both unicorn and pegasus looked at the light blue unicorn, eyebrows raised.
"Straet. Straet Shott."
"See, Brother?" said the red-maned unicorn. "Not that hard to socialize in a new place."
Straet snorted. "That's what you said about Brisbray."
Yuclid blinked. "Not one of my better moments."
"Brisbray?" asked Dash, landing in front of the brothers. "Where's that?"
"It's an earth pony settlement deep in the Everfree Forest," responded Straet. "And they are pretty mean there."
"Yeah," agreed the broken-horned unicorn. "If you can't wrestle a ganted into submission, you're worthless in their eyes."
"What's a 'ganted'?" asked the pegasus.
Yuclid blinked. "Right. You're not from the Everfree. They're really big and ornery crocodiles that can set things on fire just by staring at them."
Dash gave a look of disbelief at the idea of ganteds, but realized they said something else. "Wait, you guys are from the Everfree Forest! That's so cool!"
"Um... thanks?" offered Straet.
"I've heard stories about ponies going into the Forest, but most of them are never heard from again! And you guys just waltz out of it like it's nopony's business!"
"Well, we were born in the Forest," stated Straet. "Isn't that right, Yuclid?"
They turned to where the dark green unicorn had been standing only to find that he was gone.
"Yuclid?" Straet then sighed. "I hate it when he does this."
________________________________________
Said unicorn was actually hiding atop one of the buildings nearby, watching his brother awkwardly try to converse with the pegasus.
"I am glad I can still use telekinesis," muttered Yuclid. "Especially since I figured out how to use it to lift myself up."
"I didn't know you could do that with telekinesis!" exclaimed a voice to his right.
The green unicorn whirled to face his potential attacker, ready to fling several of the roof tiles at his assailant with telekinesis, when he realized that it was a light-purple unicorn mare he was about to strike. She had backed off a bit at his sudden movement and looked more than a little nervous.
Blinking, Yuclid placed the hardened ceramic tiles back when he had ripped them from. "My apologies. You startled me. I am Yuclid Shott."
"Twilight Sparkle," responded the mare. "You're only able to use telekinesis?"
"Yes. Broken horn and all."
"Oh. I'm so sorry. I haven't heard of anypony with an injury like that." Genuinely interested in continuing the conversation. Maybe I can make friends with him too? More friends isn't a bad thing, right?
"Well, that's good," replied the stallion, sounding mildly bitter. "Wouldn't want anypony else to have to deal with what I've lived through."
Twilight's ears went flat against the back of her head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up -"
"- bad memories?" Yuclid shook his head. "I've got a few good ones to keep me going. It's my brother down there that I'm more worried about. He's so morose." Blinking, he turned back to the mare. "Speaking of which, how did you get up here, anyway?"
"I teleported when I noticed a non-pegasus pony up here," she replied casually.
Yuclid's eyes nearly bugged out. "Teleported! Dragon's hoard, mare! You must have a lot of power!"
Twilight blushed and tried to make herself smaller (without using magic).
The green pony sighed. "Sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you."
"No, it's okay," she insisted. "I'm just not used to interaction with others. I just moved here myself."
"Ah." Yuclid looked contemplative for a moment. She was certainly cute and didn't seem to have ties to anypony else- and you're just a savage from a savage forest! Stop thinking like this!
Yuclid sighed. Straet deserved somepony to love. Resolving to keep from getting distracted, he decided to voice his question.
"So you wouldn't know who could give us a place to sleep for a few days until we decide on what we're going to do?"
Twilight blushed at the thought that came into her head but she voiced it anyway. "Well, there are a couple of unused rooms in the library I'm living in. Unused except by books, anyway." Way to go, Twi. Now he'll think you're being forward.
"A library?" His face brightened at the thought. Books! Plural! Mountains of them! "Are there any books on engineering?"
"I'm not sure," she said, scratching her chin with a hoof. "Spike and I haven't sorted through the entire place yet."
"Spike?" he replied sullenly. Thought so - she's got a coltfriend.
"He's my assistant; a baby dragon," she said with pride, similar to how a mother feels for her child.
Yuclid cocked his head to the side. "A baby dragon? Well, it'll certainly be interesting to meet a dragon that's not trying to cook me for dinner."
Twilight shook her head. "Spike's definitely not like that. He can eat nearly anything, but gemstones are his favorite."
Yuclid nodded, before turning to where his brother was still talking to the pegasus... and a white unicorn mare with a silky, shiny, purple mane. "Well, I'll have to tell Straet, my brother, that we have a place for the night. Excuse me."
Before Twilight could even ask what he was about to do, Yuclid jumped off of the roof and used his telekinesis to propel himself forward enough that he landed right on his brother's back, bringing them both to the ground.
________________________________________
A few minutes earlier...
"Wow. He's sneaky," stated Dash. "I wonder how he did it without a sound? Did he use a silence spell or did he teleport?"
"Well... he used to be able to do silencing spells, but then his horn got broken." Straet looked a little ashamed at the mention of it. "Teleporting is a high-level spell though."
"Really?" The blue pegasus looked confused. "But my good friend Twilight Sparkle teleports around town on a regular basis..."
The light blue unicorn went slack-jawed at that. Or maybe it was the white unicorn coming up behind Rainbow Dash? Nope, his eye was unfocused.
"Rainbow Dash!" chided the white mare in a playful manner. "You must introduce me to your new friend!"
Straet closed his mouth as he noticed the beautiful female unicorn. He also noticed her coifed purple mane and alluringly twisted tail. He stopped himself from admiring (read: ogling) her any further. Way out of my league.
"Sure thing, Rarity!" Dash said with a smile. "This is Straet Shott. He and his brother, Yuclid are visiting town for the moment. Straet? This is Rarity, she runs a fashion boutique."
"A what now?" the light blue unicorn asked.
"Don't you know what fashion is?" Rarity asked, trying to keep pleasant though it was obvious she couldn't believe the concept. "Or do you not know what a boutique is?"
"Well, I know how to fashion weaponry, but I think the way you used the word it means something else. And I've never heard that other wor-"
He was interrupted by Yuclid landing right on top of him, knocking them both into the dirt.
"Hey, Brother!" exclaimed the dark green unicorn as he got himself up. "I found a place for us to stay for the night."
Coughing, Straet gave his brother a one-eyed glare. "Can you please stop doing that whenever we get somewhere we haven't been before!"
"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean."
Snarling, Straet threw a left hook at Yuclid's face, the hoof making a resounding thwack as it impacted Yuclid. The dark green unicorn didn't even move, though his horn was glowing violet slightly as was Straet's simple iron horseshoe.
"Temper, temper. We are in public you know."
Straet's eye began to twitch as Yuclid turned to the shocked mares just standing there, watching the exchange.
"I apologize," the broken-horned stallion said airily. "He always does something embarrassing. I can't take him anywhere..."
Rarity and Rainbow Dash glanced at each other before giggling.
"You really are the hypocrite, aren't you?" the white unicorn asked.
"How did you do that trick?" Of course Rainbow Dash wanted to know how a non-pegasus pony was able to fly. "Was it teleportation?"
"Why does everypony think it's teleportation?" Yuclid asked, annoyed.
"Because they don't know how good you are at telekinesis," stated Twilight as she teleported to stand next to her friends.
"Wait... That was telekinesis!" Rarity inquired. Clearly she was shocked.
Yuclid rubbed the back of his head with a hoof while Straet smirked smugly at him. Yuclid never did like to be the center of attention.
"Cool!" squealed Rainbow Dash. "What other spells do you know?"
The dark-green unicorn coughed something that sounded like "elephant dude hop sickles", but nopony around thought that the answer made any sense.
"I'm sorry," apologized Rarity teasingly. "I didn't catch that."
"Oikandutharspolz."
"They can't understand you, Brother." Straet was relishing in the pseudo-torment of Yuclid - he didn't get many chances to make jokes at the dark green stallion's expense, so he seized every opportunity he could.
Yuclid snorted in frustration. "I CAN'T DO OTHER SPELLS!" He shook his head as he yelled this. But his voice suddenly went back to normal, throwing the other ponies for a loop. "I used to be able to do lots of spells, but I can only do telekinesis now that my horn is broken."
"Gah!" coughed Straet. I know it's an act to keep us from talking about him, but he can still switch gears so quickly it startles me!
The green unicorn chuckled. Gets them every time...
________________________________________
"So you're in charge of the weather?" Yuclid asked.
"Yup," responded Rainbow Dash above him, easily keeping up with the group. "For Ponyville, at least."
"Huh," he said. Clearly, the meteorological laws he had learned from his parents so long ago didn't work in the country of Equestria. "In the Everfree Forest, the weather takes care of itself."
Dash shuddered at that. "Creepy."
The green unicorn chuckled.
Twilight chose this moment to chime in with her knowledge. "Actually, when Princess Celestia and Princess Luna began their rule, the weather in Equestria took care of itself, as did the seasons. Considering how random and dangerous it turned out to be, they changed the nature of the weather to something more controllable. Pegasi were then charged with controlling the weather, and everyone was given the responsibility of the changing of the seasons in exchange for protection against sudden storms."
"Oh," responded Yuclid, as thoughts rushed through his head. "That's an interesting arrangement. Seems fair though. A little bit of labor in exchange for nopony having to worry about a sudden hailstorm ruining their day."
Meanwhile, Rarity was explaining her job to a very confused Straet.
"Wait... you mean ponies pay you to design clothes that aren't necessarily functional?" Straet couldn't understand such a ridiculous notion, and his expression reflected it.
"Well," began the white unicorn, exasperated at Straet's lack of culture. "Yes. That's what fashion is all about."
The light-blue unicorn groaned. "I don't get other ponies..."
Rarity shook her head before asking a question that had been bugging her. "So, what does your cutie mark mean?"
Straet's cutie mark was a target with an arrow stuck in the bull's eye.
"It means I can hit anything I'm aiming at with anything I throw or shoot."
"So," began Dash, asking a question of both brothers. "Where are you from exactly?"
"Shetland," responded Straet, suddenly looking pained.
"It was a nice unicorn settlement," continued Yuclid sullenly.
"We don't like talking about it much..."
"... Especially since we're the only two surviving members of it. Please, don't ask."
"Oh," responded the cyan-blue pegasus. "I'm sorry."
Before the situation could get any more awkward, a pink earth pony with a pink mane bounced up to the group.
"You boys have GOT to come to Sugarcube Corner!" She seemed absolutely giddy.
Yuclid blinked before responding. "You're that pony that gasped at us."
________________________________________
Pinkie soon learned that the brothers she was throwing a party for were born in the Everfree Forest. She didn't care. It didn't matter. It wasn't like they chose to live there, unlike that creepy mare that came out of the woods every now and then.
Anyway, Yuclid seemed content to mingle and had fun talking to other ponies on an individual basis. That was good! He was having no trouble making acquaintances as long as not too many ponies crowded him. And acquaintances led to friends!
Straet, on the other hand, seemed in a sour, nervous mood. Hmmm...
"I'd bet you'd be great at party games!" exclaimed Pinkie Pie from behind the light blue unicorn!
"GAH!" gasped Straet as he tripped over his own hooves to face his sudden assailant... oh wait, it was that crazy pink mare. "Wait, what?"
"You should play some party games! This is a party, and you should have fun!"
"But-"
She tied a cloth over his good eye before he could react. How was that mare so fast!
"Here, let's play 'pin the tail on the pony'. Here's the tail and the poster with the pony on it is in this direction." She turned him to face the poster after putting the pin holding the paper tail in his hoof.
"Hmmm... it's straight ahead of me, is it?" he asked.
"Yesseree!"
His horn glowed, enveloping the pin and the paper tail briefly before the glow died down.
"Not very aerodynamic..." he muttered. "Still..."
Surprising Pinkie (and everypony else who was watching), Straet did not walk straight ahead until he reached the poster to pin the tail to it. Instead, he threw the pin right at the poster. Ponies gasped when they heard the dull "thunk" the impromptu projectile made as it imbedded itself into the poster and the wall behind it. The music stopped as the light blue unicorn removed the cloth from his eye. The pin was three inches away from the flank of the drawing of a yellow pony on the poster, making the tail seem to hover in mid-air to the right of the pony.
"Not bad for a blind shot, if I do say so myself," commented Straet.
Impressed, many of the guests began to applaud, stomping their hooves where they stood.
"That was awesome!" exclaimed Pinkie, bouncing in place. She suddenly stopped. "I'll get the dart board!"
Within three seconds, the poster was removed from the wall and a dartboard was hung in it's place. Pinkie was suddenly next to Straet with a box of darts balanced on one hoof. He could see that there were fifteen in all, of five different colors.
"Anypony else want to compete!" she asked, excited.
"You're on!" Rainbow Dash replied immediately.
"I'll have a go!" responded a slate blue unicorn stallion with a safety pin cutie mark a moment later. His curly white mane seemed to reflect the light in such a way that it appeared light blue.
"I'd like to be the fifth player!" called out a light yellow-orange earth pony stallion from across the room. He had a yellow mane and a guitar cutie mark.
Meanwhile, Yuclid was having an engaging conversation with a beige stallion with a drab brown mane that was almost black. The stallion had an hourglass for a cutie mark.
"So everything is made up of molecules, which are in turn made of atoms?" asked the dark green unicorn as he took a sip of his levitating glass of punch.
"That is correct. The fun part is being able to visualize the atoms and then figure out how they are put together to make the molecules. For example, water is made of one hydrogen molecule connected to one oxygen, which is connected to another hydrogen."
"And the air we breathe is made up of a bunch of molecules and other particles, yes?" Yuclid had never known this sort of thing was possible, but then again, he did live in the middle of a dangerous forest up until now. Perhaps pony science had advanced this far in the more civilized Equestria?
"Quite."
"How do you know this stuff?"
"Well, I am the stallion known as the Doctor." Pride was obvious in his voice.
Yuclid cocked his head, obviously confused. "Doctor who?"
"Doctor Whooves, actually."
"Oh, so 'Doctor' is actually your name," Yuclid realized after a moment.
"And I'd like to introduce you to my better half," said the earth pony, pointing a hoof across the room at a wall-eyed grey pegasus mare fluttering near the refreshment table with seven bubbles as her cutie mark. "She's over there looking for muffins, so it'll be a moment before she comes over here."
Obviously, interspecies breeding isn't a problem in this country like it is in many of the settlements in Everfree, thought Yuclid, taking another sip of his drink.
"I know that life in the Forest must be tough," began Doctor Whooves, "but how was it? Even in all of my travels I have never come across a place with as much wild magic as the Everfree possessed."
Yuclid eyed him strangely. "What would you know of magic? I thought earth ponies can't use magic..."
"Earth ponies have their own form of magic in that we recover from sickness and injury faster than other ponies," answered the Doctor. "But I use many different machines to monitor magical energy emissions and other such radiations."
"I'm impressed," commented Yuclid. "I had no idea that Equestria was so advanced..."
"Actually, it's mostly just me," corrected the earth stallion, sounding embarrassed.
Yuclid was so startled that the little bit of concentration used to levitate his glass was lost for a brief moment, but he luckily didn't spill it when he caught it again. Before the dark green unicorn could ask what he meant, the aforementioned grey mare flew over to where they were, holding a plate of muffins of various kinds in her mouth. The Doctor put his hoof up and the pegasus gently, and expertly, balanced the plate on it.
"Yuclid Shott, allow me to introduce the mare of my life, Ditzy 'Derpy' Doo Whooves. Derpy, this is Yuclid, one of the brothers that Pinkie is throwing this party for."
"H-hi," she said meekly, grabbing a muffin from the plate with a hoof.
Raising an eyebrow, Yuclid replied with a friendly hello. Before the unicorn could get the conversation back on track, the Doctor leaned in towards Derpy's ear and whispered something. Both of her eyes went wide before they both zeroed in on Yuclid's face.
"You're a mathematician?" she asked, all pretenses of shyness suddenly gone.
"Uh... yes."
"Are you well-versed in trigonometry and calculus?"
"Trig is my forte, but the math text I actually have doesn't go very far into the concept of calculus." Yuclid wondered where this conversation was going.
Derpy smiled, closing her eyes as she did so, and began to eat her muffins, starting with the one she had been holding during most of the conversation. Confused, Yuclid turned his head to the beige earth pony.
"She's got a multiple-shot rapid-fire ballista project going that I haven't been able to do much help with. Trigonometry and geometry have little to do with quantum and particle physics I'm afraid, so I haven't the slightest clue as to how to help her with her weapon."
Yuclid nodded. That would explain a bit. "My brother would also be happy to sight the thing in for you as well. He loves firing at ranged targets."
Just as he finished speaking, another round of applause filled the room. The three ponies, earth, unicorn, and pegasus, turned to see the dart game that Pinkie, Dash, and Straet were taking part in was nearly finished. The slate grey unicorn had just magically thrown his final dart, making his third bullseye and looking happy with himself.
The Doctor chuckled. "Pierce is certainly pleased with his ability to manipulate any pointy object to his will."
"Hmm," began Yuclid. "He had to use his magic to throw it though."
Doctor Whooves gave Yuclid an odd look. Don't all unicorns throw objects with their magic?
Rainbow Dash was next, and it was obvious that she was frustrated. Her other two darts had gotten on the innermost ring near the bullseye, but she hadn't actually hit the center circle yet. With a grunt of exertion, she threw the dart with her mouth and smiled as her third throw had actually gotten the very bottom of the bullseye.
The third player, the light yellow-orange earth stallion, cheerfully picked up his final dart with his tail. With a swish of his hindmost appendage, the small dart went flying. Though his dart landed on the outermost ring, it struck right next to his other two.
Yuclid whistled. "Impressive aim."
"But Bluegrass only got the outer ring all three times..." commented Derpy.
"I don't think he was aiming at the bullseye, my dear," said the Doctor. "Besides, you've seen him when he plays games - he likes to let other ponies win."
Like Yuclid, Straet had already realized that Bluegrass (which was an odd name for a pony who wasn't blue) was letting the others win.
Pinkie's turn was up, and she stood on her head (the other two times she had also positioned herself weirdly before throwing). Strangely enough, she decided to throw the dart with her hindhooves. Whereas her first dart had missed the board entirely (but embedded itself into the wall fin-first) and her second dart landed two rings away from the center, her third dart hit the top-most part of the bullseye circle, directly opposite from Rainbow Dash's dart.
Impressed with her good aim despite her unconventional throwing style, many guests applauded.
Straet was finally up. His first two darts had both been bullseyes, but neither had hit near the very center, not wanting to knock down Pierce's darts or have his knocked down. But Pierce seemed to be strutting around like he had already won, annoying Straet and reminding him of many other pompous ponies he'd met before. The light blue stallion rolled his eye as his magic briefly enveloped the dart, measuring its mass, weight distribution, and aerodynamics. Like his first two times, Straet stood on his hind legs and held the dart with his right hoof. After a moment of steadying his aim, he let the dart fly, but with more force than his previous two shots.
The dart flew true and hit the board dead-center, knocking all three of Pierce's darts from the board. Gasps could be heard around the room as the slate blue unicorn's jaw dropped.
"By Celestia," Pierce muttered, a look of shock still plastered to his face. He turned to Straet and bowed respectively, no anger present in his mind.
Straet bowed back, as was polite, but he didn't understand how the other unicorn could lose so gracefully if he fell into the pompous archetype that he was used to. Paranoia began to set in as his brain almost went into a 'fight or flight' mindset, viewing nearly everypony in the room as a potential threat...
His train of thought was derailed when Pinkie hugged him tightly, nearly crushing his ribcage.
"I KNEW YOU'D BE GOOD AT DARTS!" she giggled at the top of her lungs as nearly every guest in the room stomped their approval.
"Can't... breathe!"
As soon as he muttered his pained sentence, Pinkie dropped him like last year's sack of moldy potatoes, but she was still dancing around the room, getting ponies to cheer for him. He wheezed a bit on the floor until he noticed a slate blue hoof being offered to help him up. He took it and came eye to eye with Pierce's smiling face.
"Should have realized you had better aim than I did," commented the white-maned unicorn. "I used my magic, but you could throw darts with your hooves like an earth pony and still hit your target. I work at the local distillery - maybe I could buy you a drink sometime?"
Straet hid his embarrassment at his earlier bout of paranoia by nodding. I wonder if I've made a friend? He turned to see that Yuclid was stomping along with an earth pony and a pegasus. Seems Yuclid is making friends too.
Staying in Ponyville not only seemed to be a pleasant prospect, but a feasible one...
________________________________________
End Chapter One.
Next chapter: books.
Author's Notes
Thanks to Vassago-Toxicity for being my beta.
Some of the background ponies are going to show up fairly frequently in this fic, especially Doctor Whooves, Derpy, Pierce, and Bluegrass. And yes, I have Derpy and the Doctor paired up (and married) in my fic. I saw a really good comic showing what good parents they are together and I couldn't resist.
Anyway, posting this mirror to FiMFiction to try and get more readers. One of the prereaders at EqD gave me a scathing critique on this. Please be gentle in your criticism, but tell me like it is.