...What a party indeed
What a party!
By: StreakTheFox
There had never been a party quite like this one. As always, Pinkie Pie was the one hosting, but this time Rarity added in a bit of her own touch to it. Earlier that month Rarity had received a request from an incredibly well known fashion magazine called “Pony Parada”, one that displays some of the most beautiful and spectacular outfits in Equestria. After submitting her best design and waiting for the magazine, they were able to get a copy of it the first day it was out. The article on Rarity's submission was not only long, but it was also good. Very good in fact, with the her dress having the highest rating in the magazine even! Feeling so proud of her, her friends decided to throw a wonderful part. And, for doing so well, she received a gift in the mail from the magazine company, containing some bits, a few business cards to some high-class fashion models, and even a case of a special drink.
That drink is what was most peculiar about the gift. It was titled “Kauffpony” with words under It in italics saying “drink responsibly”. The letter with the gift said to serve it at any sort of special party that she might hold for obtaining such an accomplishment. Seeing this, Rarity decided to bring the case to the party, heeding the words of the letter but not so much of the words on the bottle. The party was held inside of Sugarcube Corner, just an hour before the sun would be going down. The occupants were the entire six group of friends exclusively, with the only addition to this being Spike, as he was almost as excited as Rarity was for the article in the magazine.
The party had gone off without a hitch, and all seven friends were enjoying themselves just as much as any other party. It was only after they started drinking the strange “Kauffpony” that they started to experience strange... side effects.
-First few sips-
“Hey Rarity, what's in this stuff anyways?” Twilight asked as she approached her friend, carrying a glass of it beside her with her magic.
“Hmm,” Rarity thought to herself for a moment before replying. “I don't really know, actually. There wasn't a list of ingredients on the bottle, but I figured that if this was a gift from the ponies who made the magazines, then what trouble could it be?”
“Hmm... ah hope you're right. This stuff tastes kind of funny... but, ah sorta like it.”
“I know what you're saying darling... it at first appears to be sort of rancid, but then leaves you wanting more. Quite peculiar if you ask me.”
“Hey, where'd ya'll get this stuff from again Rarity?” Asked Applejack as she approached the two unicorns.
“Just from that crate. I don't think it's anything bad though, just... odd, if you ask me. Why, is something wrong?”
“Not exactly,” Applejack raised an eyebrow. “But it tastes like mah uncle Sammy's hard cider kinda... oh well.”
Applejack shrugged off the thought and downed half of her glass in a couple gulps, followed by the other two continuing with their drinks.
-First Glass Complete-
“O-oh, oh my...” Fluttershy muttered quietly as she felt her hoof on her head.
“Something wrong Fluttershy?” Rainbow Dash asked as she leaned over to her friend. “You okay?”
“Um, yes, well, at least I think so... my head is feeling a bit tingly...”
“Yeah, I kinda got that too. And my legs feel kinda funky too, are you getting that?”
Fluttershy nodded.
“Perhaps it's best if we go sit down for a bit...” Fluttershy added.
“Probably... hey, how about that counter?” Rainbow Dash pointed to the counter that was usually where the cakes sold their products.
Because of the minor party renovations, the cash register was no longer present, so Rainbow Dash flew over to grab a couple chairs and set them down in front of the bar. As the two took their seats, Pinkie Pie and Twilight came up beside them.
“Hey girls!” Pinkie exclaimed. “why ya sitting down? You're not tired already are you?”
“Nah Pinks,” Dash replied. “We're just gonna sit down for a few, if that's alright. This drink is kinda making us feel a bit... weird.”
“It's doing the same to us,” Twilight added. “I can't really explain it, but... it always leaves me wanting more. Pretty interesting stuff though, I've never tasted anything like it.”
“Did Spike get any?” Dash asked.
“I gave him some, but he really didn't like it, so he's sticking to punch for now.”
“Alright. Hey, why not pull up a chair and sit with us?” Rainbow Dash offered, waving her hoof in the spaces beside her. “We could be starting something here!”
“Oooh, that'll be fun! Lemme go get Rarity and Applejack!” Pinkie zipped off to get her friends, excited probably more than she should be at just sitting down and talking to each other.
-Second Glass Complete-
All six of the friends were sitting down at the counter, chatting constantly as some strange effects began to overtake them. Even Spike had joined in, yet he continued to insist that he proffered drinking regular punch. Viewing the group from the front, in order from left to right, it went: Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Twilight Sparkle, Spike, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and finally Fluttershy.
“I'm telling you deary, there needs to be more... elegance in your parties, the ribbons and balloons are nice, but sometimes you need to add some class into your decorations.”
“Ooooh, I love class!” Pinkie pie started off. “The teacher at my old school after I got my cutie mark always made me sit with fun straps on the chair! It was always so much fun because every time she would try something new to keep me from bouncing around but I would always find out how to get out and that was the game hahaha but anyways one time they tried to get me to see a doctor and I told them-” Pinkie continued her rant, with no practical end in sight.
“This counter is soooo sooooft...” Fluttershy cooed with a wry smile as she rubbed her hooves against it. “I think I'm in love with it... oooh...”
“Are you alright Fluttershy?” Rainbow Dash asked as she put an arm around her pegasus friend. “You're really starting to act weird.”
“Hehe, t'aint the only one here actin funny,” Applejack grinned at Rainbow Dash.
“What;s that supposed to mean?” Dash said defensively.
“Don't be playin' hollow apple to me, ah know how ya always see yer pegasi friends... hehehe.” Applejack swerved her head a bit before taking her first sip from her third glass.
“What do ya... what's that supposed to mean? I have a lot of pegasus friends!”
“Oh ah'm sure ya do sugarcube,” Applejack said before snickering under her breath.
“...I don't follow...”
“Wow, this is quite intriguing Spike!” Twilight said to him as she used her magic to write down mathematical equations on a napkin. “I wonder what's in this stuff that makes my mind unable to process information as well as it normally can, yet at the same time makes me feel... good! It's quite exciting!”
“Umm... maybe you should lay off on that stuff Twi',” Spike offered. “It might not be too good for you.”
“Oh Spike, don't worry so much!” she giggled as she leaned against her dragon assistant slightly. “It's all in good fun!” She nuzzled against one of his spines atop his head a bit.
“Um, r-right...” Spike used his claws to push Twilight off of him a bit, starting to feel creep-ed out by her, and by the drink.
-Third Glass Complete-
“Woah, check it out AJ!” Rainbow Dash called as she pointed a wavy hoof at Fluttershy. “She's out for the count!”
“Awww... she couldn't handle no more than three glasses ah guess, dun knocked her out cold.”
“Hehe, yeah...” Rainbow Dash stared with half-lidded eyes at her yellow friend for a while, taking a drink inbetween her staring.
“Ya checkin her out, huh?”
“Yea-wait, what!?” Rainbow Dash turned to Applejack with a gawking expression. “Whadya mean 'checkin her out'? I was just lookin!”
“Whatever ya say sugarcube,” Applejack's grin grew wide as she took a few gulps of her fourth glass. Her body leaned over suddenly, but she quickly corrected herself, giggling at how silly she was starting to act. “Ya know Rainbow...” She began as her voice became slick. “Ah heard you be into the feminine type, if'n ya catch mah drift...”
“The... feminine type?” Dash stared blankly straight out in front of her for a few moments, her head wobbling slightly before she realized what was being implied. “H-hey! Are you calling me a filly-fooler!?”
“Well ah didn't say that, but... if that's what yer think then ah guess-”
“I am not, I love stallions!” Dash threw up her hooves in objection. “I love... stallion junk! Yeah, all that!”
“Right Rainbow, ah believe ya, hehehe...” Applejack took a sip.
“No you don't!” Dash pointed a hoof at her. “You're a bad liar, AJ, I can tell!”
“Ah bet ya don't even know what a stallion's package even looks like,” Applejack could hardly keep her chuckles under control as she pulled over a marker just casually sitting at the edge of the counter.
“I do! I, I do know what hey look like! I've seen'em!”
“Alright then, show me.” Applejack tossed the marker to Rainbow Dash, who miraculously managed to catch it in her mouth. “Go on, draw what it looks like! Ah wanna see if ya know'er not.”
Dash glared at her friend, and then down at the counter. The marker was brown, and so was the counter, so she couldn't really draw on that... the color wouldn't show. It was then that she looked over to her left and focused her gaze on her sleeping pegasus friend.
“Are you hearing this Spike?” Twilight giggled like a little school filly. “Applejack is calling Rainbow Dash a filly fooler, hah!”
“Oh wow... I never knew Rainbow Dash like, swung that way.”
“I totally knew it, I knew it! Just the way Dash keeps acting around mares I, I totally took some notes. Where are my notes on this cuz I know I took them, hoohoohoo!”
“I never saw you take any notes on stuff like this,” Spike shot Twilight a confused look.
“Oh I write down a lot of things Spike! Almost subcon-, serbkinch-, uh....”
“Subconsciously?”
“Yes, that! Wait... how were you able to think of a big word this time? I'm usually the one helping you with that... are you hanging out with some other smarty pants pony that I don't know about!?”
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“My library IS the only library in all of Ponyville, right?” Twilight shot her face uncomfortable close to Spike's, their noses touching. “RIGHT!?”
“Y-yes, of course! Why would Ponyville need more than one library anyways?”
“Oh I know Spike, that's why I don't want any competition, nor do because there can only be one... and if there can only be one library, then there can only be one librarian, and if there's only one librarian, then there's only one librarian assistant and-” Twilight gasped suddenly, making it look as like she had come to some enormous realization. “And then I won't have you!” Without warning, Twilight pulled Spike into a tight – almost too tight – hug as she rubbed her cheek against the side of his head. “Oh Spike, never leave me!”
“T-Twilight!” his cheeks blushed a bit as he tried to push himself off of her, but to no avail. “Your breath stinks!”
“And, and, and nopony ever loved me at all! Waaaaahhhh!” Pinkie was balling her eyes out, curling her front arms around her head as she laid her face agaisnt the counter. “I was so lonely, and so sad! I want cupcakes!” She suddenly switched from a state of deep depression to one of complete calmness for a few seconds as she took another drink of her fourth glass. Immediately afterwords, she went straight back to having her face on the counter, tears flowing from her eyes. “Waaahaahaaa!”
“I-it's alright, deary! Really I, I mean, parties are so much fun, aren't they?” Rarity tried her best to support her broken down friend. “I mean, it's not like they were physically hurting you or anything.”
“Yeah-huh! They weer throwing things at me, and hitting my side when they walked by, and jerking my hair sometimes, and it only made me cry more! And, and, this one time, I had a cupcake in my hoof, and I was about to eat it, but...” Pinkie stopped and looked at one of her hooves, as if placing herself back when the situation happened. “But... it fell onto the floor! Waaahahahaha!”
“Well you shouldn't have let them do all those awful things to you!” Rarity said sternly. “If I were you, I would have kicked each and every one of their flanks! Oh I know I may not look like it now, but I used to be a real strong fighter filly when I was still in school! If I was there I would have certainly protected you from any nasty colts or snooty little mares.”
“R-really?” Pinkie sniffled, wiping some tears from her eyes.
“Why yes, you're such a good friend of mine Pinkie, and I know just where to hit a pony where it really hurts!” Rarity swung her hooves around a bit, as if she were sparring some invisible being.
“C-could... could you tell me some stories then? Like, of your fights and stuff?”
“Why certainly! Well, I remember this one time where-” Rarity burped suddenly, and then blushed in embarrassment as Pinkie simply giggled. “O-oh my, did I just do that? How unladylike!”
“Teehee! That was a good one!”
-Fouth Glass Complete-
(excluding drunkenshy)
“There, that's what they look like!” Rainbow Dash stated as she pointed her hoof to Fluttershy. “I drew'em right there, on her face. See? I know what they look like! Just like that, there, yeah!”
“Well, yah got yerself the basic figure ah guess,” A smirk stood firm on Applejack's face as she looked at Applejack's work. “And wouldn't ya know it, ya drew'em right on Fluttershy's head!”
“Well, what else could I use?” Rainbow Dash grew defensive. “It wouldn't show up on the counter and Twilight took the only napkin around, so I had to use something!”
“Yeah, and ya used Fluttershy...” Applejack leaned in with a growing smirk. “But you always like ta use her, don'tchya?”
“!!!” Rainbow Dash blushed furiously at this, and then turned to her whole body to applejack, her voice beginning to fill with rage. “I don't use Fluttershy! I would never do that!”
“Then she likes it too?”
“Yes! I mean, wait, no! I, I don't do that sort of stuff to her!”
“Suuuuuure...”
“Stop that!” Applejack slammed her hoof on the counter. “I, I don't like mares that way! Really!”
“Ah can tell yer lie'n, Dashy... ah can tell...” Applejack closed her eyes half ay as she smirked harder.
“Am not!” Rainbow Dash reached over and took another few gulps of her fifth glass. “I don't like doing... stuff with other mares!”
“How do ya know? Have ya done it?”
“Well, no! But I don't need to, I already know!”
“Ya can't say ya don't like it if ya haven't tried at least once, Rainbow!”
“Yes I can!” Rainbow Dash leaned closer to Applejack, glaring straight into her eyes.
“Ah don't believe ya! Ah need ta see ya try fer myself first!”
“Oh you want me to try huh? Well, f-f-fine! I'll show you! I'll show you right now that I can do things with a mare and not like it!” Dash leaned in closer still, a blush starting to form on her cheeks.
“Well go on then sugarcube...” Applejack's voice suddenly became soft as she leaned in herself, touching their noses together as she obtained her own blush. “...show me.”
There was a brief pause, a moment of utter silence between the two as they just stared at each other. But in a flash, Rainbow Dash found herself closing her eyes and throwing her hooves around Applejack's body, pulling her into a tight embrace with their lips locking together tight. Applejack immediately grasped onto Rainbow Dash in return, closing her own eyes and kissing her deeply with their tongues already out and wrestling around inbetween the two. Their bodies pressed and grinded together, both sounding out soft moans as they continued to make out ravenously.
“Mmm~...” Twilight watched Applejack and Rainbow Dash closely, her teeth biting down on her bottom lip. “Look at that Spike... those two really know how to have some fun.”
“Uh, I, y-y-yeah...” Spike stuttered. He was also watching, his face bright red as he watched his two friends make out. “That's... h-hot...”
“Yeah, it is isn't it...” Twilight stared on for a few more moments before an idea popped into her head. “Hey Spike, ya know what would be even more hot?”
“W-wha? What would that be?” Spike looked over at Twilight just in time to see her wrap one of her front legs around and and nudge him closer to her.
“Well...” Twilight began, a big smirk on her face as she scooted closer to Spike, making their noses touch again. “I bet with you always breathing that fire of yours, the inside of your mouth must be really hot... and maybe I could have a feel for myself.”
“T-twilight!? What, but, I'm not...!”
“Oh c'mon Spike,” Twilight snickered a bit as she pressed her face more against his. “Think of this as just another task for you to do, since you are my number one assistant,” Twilight winked.
“Gulp...!”
“So then I gave him a kick to the muzzle, and then one to the knee, and then one to the hip, and then another to the knee!”
“Wow Rarity, you go!” Pinkie cheered as she watched her friend display herself punching at nothing in front of her. “I bet you really showed up all those bullies at school!”
“Well of course! And all the while I did it in a sophisticated and dignified manner!” Rarity leaned back a bit, speaking as if it were all common knowledge. “Why, even a young lady as I was had an image to uphold.”
“Teehee, that's so cool!” Pinkie clapped the side of her hooves together as she wiggled around a bit.
“And of course they would always make up excuses as to why they wouldn't try at my temper again! Why, they would always say the silliest things like 'I used to want to pick on you, but then I took a hoof to the knee'. Pssh!”
“Ooooh, yeah, he musta been a really big scardy pantsy I bet! I wanna hear more, please please please oh pleasy weasy with cherries and frosting and whipped cream and chocolate syrup and candy and sugar and brown sugar even and sprinkles and marshmallows and a banana and caramel and cashews on top!?”
“Hmm, sure, I guess I could tell you a bit more. In fact, I think I could go on about some of my other adventures as well when I was just reaching my teen years!”
-Fifth Glass Complete-
“Uh... Twilight?” Spike stared at the floor, with Twilight sprawled out across it with a goofy smile.
Twilight had just finished her fifth glass, and then proceeded to give Spike a big lick on the lips. Immediately afterwords, she broke out into a fit of giggles, and spontaneously and unceremoniously flopped off her chair and onto the floor, knocked out cold. Spike simply stared at her, his face still red as he wore a confused expression. He didn't know if she was dead, sleeping, or playing dead, or simply decided that the floor was the new cool hang out place. He leaned over in his chair and, with a bit of hesitation, proceeded to poke at one of her hooves with his claw.
“...Twilight?”
Rainbow Dash and Applejack were on top of the counter, the two of them still in each other's hooves as they tried weakly to lick at each other's lips. Their bodies were covered in sweat and their energy was exhausted from such a spontaneous and intense interaction. They continued to look at each other even as their eyes continued to close and, simultaneously, they both fell asleep. Rainbow Dash was laid back on the counter, her head hanging off the back edge while Applejack was on top of her, their legs mingled together loosely with Applejack's chin resting on Dash's chest.
“So then I told him 'oh, trust me, I know you're a virgin', and then he-”
“Woah!” Pinkie suddenly interrupted as she looked behind Rarity. “Looks like everypony decided it was nap time!”
“Hm?” Rarity turned her head and looked at the scene behind her, with the only response was Spike looking back and giving a shrug in response. “O-oh, oh my... it seems as though the others had a bit of trouble handling their drinks...”
“Yeah, I'll say,” Pinkie nodded in agreement. “Well, at least we all had fun! I mean, wowy zowy! What a party!”
“Y-yes deary,” Rarity stuttered as she examined the scene before her.
She was able to discern what had happened not long ago, judging simply by the positions their friends had ended up in. From Fluttershy's facial decorations, to Twilight laying on the floor with a big grin while Spike seemed to be completely weirded out, and finally to Rainbow Dash and Applejack laying against each other on the counter within mouth's distance of each other. Rarity knew this might be a messy deal to clean up once they all came to, and silently hoped that the drink might erase some of their memories when they got up.
“...What a party indeed.”
“...lets hold another one with those drinks!”
“No, Pinkie... no.”