Chapter 1
The college theater was full, the doors were closed and the everypony's signed waivers had been collected.
Behind the curtain Spitfire cracked her neck and got ready. She had an idea what she wanted to talk about, she knew her basic bullet points, and there shouldn't be any problems from a hostile audience: personal and parental consent waivers had been collected like tickets at a movie theater. A stagehand gave her the signal and she stepped on stage with Soarin and Rainbow Dash. The two had come to serve as examples and be her moral support.
"Good evening Canterlot!" Her voice carried in the theater's perfect acoustics and ponies cheered. It had all the atmosphere of a concert and not a presentation. Spitfire liked that; their retention would be better.
"All right everypony settle down and pay attention. This presentation is meant to supplement the basics for sex ed. Give it a living, breathing, equine touch.
I know a lot of you might have some experience, and some of you have none but are embarrassed to admit it.
So we're going to start from the beginning and introduce you to the differences between mares and stallions. I think you all know my partner and fellow Wonderbolt, Soarin-"
Soarin raised his hoof in a wave with a cheerful smile. "Hi."
"-and joining us for this demonstration is Rainbow Dash."
Dash was practically hyperventilating under a wide smile, endlessly repeating a mantra of 'ohmygosh ohmygosh ohmygosh ohmygosh'.
Spitfire kept her own grin on her face even as she saw the way Rainbow was sweating. Spitfire had been assured everything was acceptable. Now that the moment was there, however, she didn't know if Dash was nervous because of the crowd, her companions or the subject matter itself. Still, she didn't have a choice but to move along.
"Rainbow was a 'Best Young Flier', for those of you who don't know that's a little competition we have every year in Cloudsdale. She's a very talented young lady and was quite the Wonderbolts fan.
As most of you young ladies are aware girls are attracted to very different things at different times. Let's look at this chart."
(The chart is for the benefit of the audience watching at home, not the ponies in the theater. For the purposes of continuity assume they are seeing the stallion equivalents from their own world.)
"Here we have a variety of famous attractive men.
For examples we have Actor Johhny Depp, Actor George Clooney, Wrestler Dave Bautista, and -depending on your point of view- actor Robert Pattinson or Vampire Edward Cullen.
Some girl likes every single one of these guys, some like only one, and some girls and guys think that anyone who likes any one of these guys is crazy. Well, that's a matter of taste. Everyone has their pros and cons:
Depp is suave and clever and plays a lot of deliciously Gothic roles, but some girls find him queer.
Clooney has great features and a smooth voice but some find him bland or think the gray hair makes him look old.
Batista is strong and has a physique that only .001% of the human male population share but some women find his musculature a turn-off. Typically, they quote disliking steroids or they find muscle mass grotesque.
Pattinson is young and unblemished but some think he's an over-hyped nobody or only care that he's not the fantasy Edward Cullen.
And of course Edward Cullen has the 'noble' vampire mystique and charm. But he's not real, and even if he was he's technically a corpse so loving him is necrophilia. That and he is quite simply the worst example of vampires in the history of cinema and fiction, period."
There were patches of cheers and boos from the audience. Spitfire shrugged, not minding too much that everypony now knew her personal opinion and moved on.
"Anyway, what girls will find attractive in a male will vary a lot, so we appreciate that you boys will find that confusing.
Still, generally speaking you can say girls' attraction is mental.
Rainbow likes Soarin a lot and there's a lot of good reasons but off the bat she's a fan. That in and of itself is complicated. Soarin is at the top of the list of male flyers. He isn't just great at it, he's famous and makes a good living from it.
So let's tick off the list: famous, athletic, wealthy, brings pride to our nation and, since we respond to emergencies, he's a male in uniform. Not just a show uniform, national uniform. As you can appreciate, that makes Rainbow and a lot of mares 'squee'."
At this point Soarin stood up on his hind legs and Spitfire walked up to him. She opened the zipper on his flight suit and pulled it down to his belly.
"And it helps that he's handsome. I don't know how handsome he'd be without the fame, uniform and shows, but he is handsome."
She pulls it down all the way and exposes Soarin's genitalia. He laughs slightly out of embarrassment but allows it because it's part of the instructional.
"He's got a good piece of equipment there too but, honestly, what it looks like may or may not do it for you. It's give and take. But, just like male things in general it's not about what he's got but how he uses it.
And Soarin does a lot of things right that make him a very desirable stallion."
Now Soarin's blushing. Spitfire isn't talking generalities; she's definitely crossed the line into personal experience.
"So, that's the basic idea on females: very complicated and very confusing and very very intimate and secret.
Males are a lot easier."
Spitfire went over to Dash and nibbled her ear. Soarin shows keen interest.
"Stallions are visual, a lot more visual than mares. Everything I said before, most of it doesn't apply here.
A mare won't be more attractive because she's famous but she's more likely to be famous if she's attractive.
Athletics are almost always plus because there's very little beauty without health.
Some stallions find a female in uniform a turn on, some worry about it, and some think it's challenging to their malehood if their girl has a tougher role than they do.
Money, status, family; these really don't matter. A male might have these standards as prerequisite but that's more about breeding, security, station or tradition than attraction. A stallion who obsesses over that is typically a social climber but there are exceptions. It matters because when a stallion like that has finished his climbing days and looks around he's going to want to feed his passions. To that end he will pursue a female he does find attractive.
And before anypony gets on a high horse, let me clarify something: that rule works both ways. There are gold diggers and social climbers of both genders. Keep your eyes open and your hearts pure; those stories rarely have happy endings for either party."
Spitfire got up close to Dash and whispered through her teeth: "You ok or should I take over all of this myself?"
Dash gave an invisible exhale and whispered back: "I'm cool. Go on, just like planned."
Spitfire nodded and patted Dash on her shoulder.
"Now that's got me sidetracked so let's get back to attraction itself. Bluntly, Soarin is really gonna like watching me do this."
Spitfire raised Rainbow's Tail exposing her plot and anus. Rainbow's brow narrowed with an evil grin and she wiggled her rear a little. Soarin and a lot of the audience were drooling.
Spitfire patted Dash's rump affectionately and Dash laughed off her embarrassment.
"FYI, it's easy to know when someone is sexually excited or, as you may otherwise hear it, aroused, hot, in heat or horny: males will get an erection, as Soarin's demonstrating right now, and females will get moist or, if you prefer the term, wet. Mmm, Dashie here must really like -all- the Wonderbolts. If not, then I guess we're lucky she really likes me and Soarin."
Dash was once again 'ohmygosh'ing uncontrollably under her breath.
Spitfire went back over to Soarin and gently handled his erection. "So, moving back to poor Soarin. As you can see he's aroused but like any muscle there are degrees. He's ready and good to go now and that's just from seeing me expose Dash, and watching me 'present' her flank to him."
She leans over and raises her tail while squatting slightly, giving him a rear view that shows off her heat.
"A male can and will get hard on his own, sometimes without provocation, but if you want to keep him hard and get the most out of him you need to show some encouragement. The worst thing a gal can do is assume her job is done once she looks pretty. If he got you wet or he's trying and you want to go ahead with him you need to push his buttons. Find out what he likes. Contrary to popular media, not every stallion likes -this- (this being a menage a trois) and many of you won't have a girlfriend who won't mind being a prop for you to tease and entice your coltfriend with.Yeah, expect to manage on your own.
Some males like to hear encouragement, propositions, ideas for intercourse, or just plain old filthy things whispered in their ear. Some will be satisfied just to hear your hot, squirming, labored breath. Again males are visual: Wear nice clothes or just something different or in a different way. Naked with a bow-tie, stockings, socks, hats, full outfits for a special occasion, something he remembered you in on a particular date. Move a certain way. Tease, seduce, -be- sexy.
And touch. Touch is easily the most important part of it because sex is physical activity. Think about what you're doing, plan it, study it a bit. Talk about it. And at the moment feel it. And enjoy it.
By the way boys, everything I just said is a two way street. Don't get lazy. Your girl isn't as visual as you are so if you look good it's not a guarantee. It's stacked against you in a way: if you're gorgeous success is not guaranteed but if you're a slob failure is. Learn to talk, learn to flirt and learn to tease. Learn what she likes, how she likes it and do it.
Explore each other and learn your tells.
Soarin's cock is a veritable thermometer here. The harder and larger his shaft gets, the more pronounced the veins are, the harder his little heart is pumping and the hormones flushing his system are ready for overdrive.
Dashie here is the same. It's not as obvious visually but her pussy is 'winking', quivering. You need to be gentle with this but feel her inside a little and you can see how wet she is." She giggled a little as she looked back at Soarin. "You can see it in me too, right Soarin baby? This is the way we're built. We're not going for a rugburn; Friction is bad.
Let your girl get good and wet, you wouldn't chafe her outsides for an hour and expect her to like it so put two and two together and don't risk doing it to her insides.
Now comes the fun part, actual sex. It's something you need to think about and consider. And I mean that; think really hard on who you have sex with, when and why.
Rainbow is still the same girl she was a year ago when she was following our shows and dreaming of becoming one of us, but things have changed for her. She's grown up and joined us up at the academy.
There's a bit of residual hero worship, and don't get me wrong that's a great thing, but she found out sex is about more than just having a crush or admiring somepony. And you all will too. You're going to find out that you want more from your dreams with a special somepony than just spending time together now and then and having fun together, and by fun together I do include sex. Many of you aren't just going to want to spend a good time, you're going to want to share your life with somepony.
Soarin and I have spent a lot of time together, and at times that did include quality time snuggling inside a really small cloud. I like him..." She stumbled on the word then corrected herself. "Sorry, no. That's too detached. The truth is I care about Soarin a lot. Our job is tough and sometimes dangerous. Strong feelings like that change you over the years.
I don't just see the same handsome stallion that made me pant: I see a pony I argued with over which academy groups to promote and which ones to fail and which deserved a second chance.
I remember tryouts and time trials, challenges met and failed.
I remember going to far shows in other countries and hobnobbing at regal events.
I remember emergencies and crisis, watching somepony brave I admire do dangerous and sometimes reckless deeds all to help somepony else.
I remember being on both ends of the bed; visiting at hospital when one of those stunts or bits of daring was a miss by this much.
The truth is I love Soarin. I trust him implicitly, I've done it for years on and off the job.
So when we relax together in the off season or on our downtime sometimes we just hang around talking about the crew and sometimes we just loaf around quietly because we know we don't really need to say anything.
And sometimes, when I invite him over to spend the night, I know ahead of time if he can or won't. Because of something going on in his life, or something he's feeling, or some pressure we're going to have to go through.
I'll share a little about that. Soarin doesn't want any distractions a month before the Academy starts. We get a lot of applications because it's a lot of young fillies' dreams to come here. He gives a lot of himself, double checking applications to make sure somepony whose promise might be overlooked is given a fair chance.
Everypony knows he loves pie. Not everypony knows which bakeries are his consistent favorites.
...something a little more intimate: When Soarin stays overnight now and then I pleasure him with my mouth. And when he climaxes, I encourage him. I accept it. I don't normally do that when I'm with a stallion, not because I think it's wrong but because I love myself. I respect myself.
That means I protect myself.
And that means as a rule I don't allow a stallion in me raw. Some of you know that term as 'bareback'. That means without the use of protection like a condom.
Soarin gets an exception because of all the years, all the times, all we've known.
I love him, I respect him, I accept him.
So I kiss him, I caress him. He goes wild when I caress his tip with my feathers by the way. I lick him. I suckle him. And when he's ready I look up into his face and encourage him to go on, and when he ejaculates in my mouth and I feel it hit my throat I savor the taste of his seed and then I swallow.
And I know Soarin feels the same way about me. After all those years, all those times, and all we've known, when I'm down on all fours and I want him inside me... let's be obvious -when I want him to ride me- he still slows things down and slips on the condom.
It was a big thing for me to let him slip off the condom when I took him in my mouth. It meant I trusted he was clean, trusted he wasn't sick. Let's be honest: there are a lot of venereal diseases and nopony should want any of them. Not for themselves just for spending a night of intimacy with someone you care about, and not to give to someone else they're spending that time with. It's cruel, vile... evil. And completely unpony to want somepony, anypony, to suffer from those conditions. The sad truth is that sometimes you don't know. You don't always have these things because you acquired them: sometimes you're born with them or get them some other way.
It does take a certain distrust to tell somepony 'I don't want you inside of me' or 'I don't want to be inside of you' because you're terrified of something they might have.
But let me tell you something else: living like that, in fear of intimacy, shutting yourself out from the world because of that is a cruelty of its own. Sensuality and sexuality are wonderful, beautiful parts of life and making anypony paranoid about them to the point where they're terrified to do something we naturally want and desire is wrong. Sensuality and sex are a part of life and it's your right to explore them, but like every right it has to be earned.
This freedom brings with it the responsibility of safety and protection.
It's loving and respecting your partner to insist on it and do it, and the right to walk away if they refuse even if that leaves you frustrated, angry or unsatisfied.
Soarin tells me when he's dating someone new and knows we shouldn't fool around.
I've never known Soarin to come knocking on my door when he's seeing if things will become serious with somepony else. And after it didn't work out, and so far I'm speaking to history not prophecy, he waits until after his medical comes through clear. By now I know that if we're cuddling and he gets excited and nudges my head towards it ever so slightly when it isn't wrapped it's because he's already gone through the process and knows it's safe for me to put in my mouth.
Believe me girls, when you and your male are so close that you know you can take that on faith, thinking about it will make you wet without even wanting to.
But that's just one half of it. No matter how many times we've disagreed, and believe me we have argued about it, I've still never felt Soarin's warmth penetrate inside me down there. And I've experienced that a few times before so I can tell you it feels wonderful.
We're not talking about disease or safety now, we're talking about commitment.
For all our years and all our time together Soarin and I have never seriously decided to take our relationship to the next level. Exclusivity while you're dating is one thing and I strongly encourage that for the sake of safety.
When i say the next level I mean sharing your life together. All of it. And the main thing that comes to mind with that should be the most obvious: family. For all our love and affection and the way we keep coming back to each other we never hit the point where we decided they were the one.
Don't get me wrong, there are times when you think you do. Jealousy, especially, can make you think you feel things the rest of you isn't really sure you do. Other times it's pride.
Sometimes its fear of being alone, or not finding anypony else that's as good. Thinking about all that can make you very depressed or sad. Someponies get desperate. None of that -ever- helps.
Relationships aren't simple, and it's because they aren't just based on love, trust and respect. There's a big thing called compatibility. Soarin and I work together. Against odds our being lovers never affected our work or ability to cope with the rest of the team.
Some of our friends joke that we are committed to each other, committed in our own way. We're high flyers, we love the excitement, we go out on our own to test the air at times, we love our freedom. And in the end we each fly back to the same spot and are together again. It's a good theory.
Others think we're both young, what we feel is real but it's the heat of youth keeping us from maturing or becoming responsible. 'Responsible' being a little goading way of saying we're ready to settle down. Commitment. It means marriage, starting a family, and sharing all of the rest of your lives together forsaking every other possibility. And it's real because of that compatibility. We're not perfect. Put in simple language that means we're not complete. All of us have a set of building tools and materials and we build ourselves with them. Compatibility means that you meet someone and you pool your tools and materials and the existing things you've built already and build a whole.
For Soarin imagine right now that all he has is represented by a pie. Put it in combination with someone like that lovely apple merchant from the Gala and you probably get a friendship and a one-sided business relationship there. Tradespony and client. Add Soarin to someone else and maybe you get a smaller friendship but a bigger business. A third somepony else and it might be the reverse.
Add me and you get, well, you got what our life has been so far. Add me and look forward a few years, honestly I don't know what you'd get. The same way I'd say add Rainbow Dash and I don't know what you'd get either. Nopony knows and that's the wonder of life. It isn't a book you can peek forward to the end or a game you can get a strategy guide to. The only way to find out is to live it, exploring as you go and finding out the hard way. And loving each other through the blind process and feeling where each others' heart was during those mistakes.
I don't know. But I do think I know that when I add somepony, and I'm not sure who that is or will be, to Soarin's pie the end result won't be a friendship or a business. More than a pie, it'll be a complete Hearthswarming Eve feast on the table with a mare and one or a couple of foals, and friends, and a nice home. And there in the middle of it'll be Soarin. Happy as I know I haven't seen him yet, because he'll have something he didn't have before.
I know he has it in him, I think it just might be somewhere in me too. I don't know that we have it if we're together. And I know he doesn't know either, which is why even when I tell him, beg him or order him otherwise he still slips on that condom and while I feel him spasm inside me -I feel him quiver and that makes me release and feel all jiggly too- I haven't felt the hot of his seed inside me traveling to the parts of me that make foals happen. He won't do it. Because he loves and respects me and because he knows you have to be compatible -before- you have kids he won't let himself. He won't force the issue, or let it force itself. And over the years I've only come to love and respect him more for it. Sometimes I think I love him because of it. And I know, and I know because he's told me and I've checked around so I don't just have his word on it, that he treats every other mare with the same courtesy for exactly the same reason. Kids aren't just one pony's business, they're both. They're a bit of both of you, coming together to create someone new and wonderful, with a mind and ideas of their own and their own personality to grow into and explore. You never know, because your kids won't look like you, be like you, or share your own cutie mark. They'll need both of you, and that's a responsibility you have no right to put aside for nothing more than selfishness.
When you're both ready you'll come together and build that home and family you dreamed of. If I know ponies, you'll be every bit as naughty together as you ever hoped for. You'll just also have more.
That's really all we have to say everypony. We've discussed attraction, arousal, romance, trust, sex, diseases, disappointment, desperation, commitment, marriage and children. Don't take it as given, there's always another way to see things and always more to learn. I've told you a lot but let me end with one real piece of advice: take it easy. We know speed, we do it for a living and this is not a race and there is no rush. Falling in love happens naturally and even when you don't feel like it you have all the time in the world.