Porn
So I was laying on my couch, surfing through FIMFucktion for some clop and gettin' mah breaking bad on when my dick got hard. Then a portal opened in the floor and I fell into a land of horses.
...
"Do you want my cock?" Spike asked?
"Yes, please" Fluttershy said.
Then rarity said, "me too."
Then poor Twist said "no" but Spike didn't care because he was raping her anyways.
Then the TARDIS appeared and they went back in time to when spike wasn't an evil rapist.
...
"Grandpa, I have to write a memoir for FLC. Help." Spike Jr. said.
"Uncle Spike'll give you a story you'll never forget!" said Old Man Spike.
"Tell me now."
"Once upon a time... I fucked every horse in the land of horses. It was hot. Your too ugly to fuck horses son, but it's okay."
"Tell me more. Please."
"Well, I was helping my ho ass roommate, Twilight Spaffle, when I noticed she gotta big ass. I say 'luts fuck ho?'"
"Okay."
"Not you fag boy. The ho wit a big ass."
"kk gramps."
"So we have sex but we get caught by this tree hugger bitch. But luckily, the tree hugger bitch thinks I gotta big dick so it's okay. She's also a lesbo so she thinks Twilight's gotta big ass too so it's hot. So then, we smoke a bunch of Mary J and watch Shrek 2 and decide it's time to have an orgy."
"Too much cum 4 me."
"Shut the fuck up, fag boy. So I say 'it's time to fuck in the super secret cloud place that some other lesbo faggot ass ho ass bitch that was blue told me about whilst I was at the Ponyville MacDonalds gettin' me a royal with cheese' and both them ho's say 'HELL YEA!' So then we go get the blue ho and she says 'luts go smoke a bowl, eh?' So we go get high as fuck on crystal in the spooky cloud place and this big black ass mutant bitch with a horn and some wings is like 'Y'all can't be smoking the blue stuff up here' but we're all high as fuck and I just say 'Fuck the po-lice nigga,' which was a terrible idea because this nightmare bitch was black as fuck."
"Grandpa, I..."
"Shut the hell up faggot! I'm tellin' a story!"
"Aight then."
"Aight is right bitch! So, where was I? Oh, yeah, the black mutant bitch. We're almost to the good part. So we got kicked out of Horse Land but we didn't give a fuck and hid out in Ponyville in Twilight's secret room that was used during the holocaust to hide all of Twilight Spaffle's stupid ass Jew friends. I snorted a couple of lines of cocaine and said 'FUCK YEA! LUTS RAPE EVERYTHING!' But everypony said that rape wasn't nice and that rape porn wasn't hot so I through a fit and in my rage decided to rape everypony in Ponyville. It didn't work out so well though because they all fucking loved it in the ass. Except poor Twist."
"Wow."
"Wow is right ho! So, I raped all them big booty ho's in Ponyville including the pouty little bitch, Twist."
"So, it was a gang bang?"
"No. Not exactly, son. You see, a gang bang is where a whole bunch of ponies fuck (usually rape) one little ho bag. But, this was a reverse gang bang where one pony was fucking (raping) all of them little ho bags."
"Wow. Okay. I'm sure I'll get an A+ grandaddy! I just need the date that this happened."
"It was the great reverse gang bang of '69 son."
"Alrighty."
"If you don't get an A, I'll rape the fucking shit out of your whore ass teacher."
Back to the present...
My dick had grown so fucking hard from listening to Old Man Spike's story that I came and broke the TARDIS. Oh well.
Then I re-wrote time and fucked the shit out of everypony with Spike. Man was it a great reverse gang bang. Then we got wasted and sucked each other off. I'm not gay like all those other little faggot bitches but damn does Spike have the biggest fucking cock ever!
Then I went back through the portal and raped my dog and went to jail.
The end.