Coming to Senses

Out of all of my friends, it is you who I seem the least compatible with. I don’t consider this to be at any fault on our own halves, instead, it just seems that neither of us have anything in common with one another.

I took a hard look at the relationship we had, or for better terms, the lack of one. Not only this, but I looked at who we really were, at least who I thought you were.

You are a pony, a pegasus more exactly, of adventure. Like my dear friend Applejack, you have a quality of always being the first to set a course of action, and you never seem afraid to get your feet dirty. Me? Well, I think I’d rather pass on getting myself dirty in the unexplored wilderness.

You are a pony of brashness, albeit a quality which can cause trouble or harm. Most of the time you attempt to use it in a positive light as a tool to air your opinions. However, unbenounced to yourself, sometimes your strong opinion hurts other ponies. The many comments you make on my love of fashion usually fly over my head, as I know you are merely pushing my buttons. But sometimes they do hurt, although I do know you didn’t mean it.

You are a pony of competitive spirit, and will never turn down a challenge that is presented to you. I suppose in a way it shows your perseverance and dedication to being the most awesome, both qualities being admirable, even if the reason isn’t so much. I bet I could challenge you to contest of who can create the best outfit with the right words, even though you know not even the first clue about fashion sense. But you aren’t a quitter, and even if the impossible is presented, you’ll put full effort anyway.

You are lazy sometimes, you can be annoying and disrespectful on occasion, you can get extremely jealous, and you can boast like there is no tomorrow.

That aside, most of all my dear, your element seems to best show who you truly are.

The element of loyalty.

Meeting you for the first time, it would be rather difficult for most ponies to sense this quality in yourself with all the negatives and positives. More than anything, the brashness and boasting will be noticed first, and it might be why some people in town are turned off by your attitude towards things. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten the mare do well incident. Even if we were behind it, your ego was starting to dwarf Ponyville in size.

But being your friend for as long as I have, the times where you put all of us before your hearts desires is where you became not only a friend, but a true one at that. Differences aside, I’ll always be by your side, even if I may not agree.

And me?

Well I am a pony who always sees the beauty in things, whether they be existent or potential. By now, I do understand that perhaps you are never going to want be to spice up your wardrobe or give your mane a stylish overhaul. Out of all our friends, I could come up with the most outfits for you Rainbow, each color presenting a whole new palette of opportunity.

I am a pony who can be selfish and self-centered. It is a quality I am not proud to have, but I admit its existence within my being. Even to this day, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you for saving my life on the day Twilight gave me that wing spell. I was an egotistical selfish idiot that day, and don’t deny it, because I know before I was plummeting to my doom, you were thinking the very same thing.

I am a pony who can have flair for the overdramatic, who will once in a blue moon give the simplest of issues a theatrical and over the top approach. Okay, instead of once in a blue moon, half of the time I will tend to overdo it. I can’t help it, that’s just the type of pony I am.

I am a pony of resourcefulness and will always be one to pay attention to the slightest detail, even if it is something hard to notice with the naked eye.

But, as in you, my element seems to where I shine brightest, as evident by the many times you and others have mentioned this to be. The element of generosity is something I hold near and dear to myself, as it a critical part of who I am as a pony. Never will I hesitant to help any of my friends when in need, no matter the circumstance. The three identical gleaming crystals on my flank may not symbolize my generosity, but it is the quality I am most proud to possess.

Loyalty and generosity, when you think about it the two could be a rather complementing pair. What pony wouldn’t want somebody who has both of these standout qualities?

What I cannot come to understand is how we can be so polar opposites of one another with all we seem to share in common, even if indirect. Our dedication for our craft is uncanny, you have your flight, I have my fashion. We share a nearly indistinguishable love of the spotlight, and it has gotten us both in trouble in the past.

But the more I think about how opposite in nature we may be, the more frequent thoughts of us enter my head. And when I say “us,” I mean our relationship we currently share.

Sure, we’ll spend time with one another when in the company of our wonderful friends, but other than these occasions, when do we actually see one another. I’m at a loss when thinking of an occurrence where just the two of us spent time together. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I haven’t made numerous attempts to request your company in the past. I’ve tried countless times to get you to spend time with me, but every single time was turned down.

One day not too long ago I made mention of a possible get together for lunch, as there was a new seafood restaurant opening up at the end of town. You refused the offer the minute I asked you, stating that you had important weather patrol manners to deal with.

Rainbow Dash, do you really mistake me for being that gullible?

I was already aware that you were off on said day, so not only did I not believe the poor excuse attempt, but I was also quite hurt. It was in a physical manner, but more so emotionally, as I could not understand why you seemed to turn down every effort I had made on becoming better aquatinted with you. Alright, I can admit that taking a pony like yourself for makeovers or a day at the spa is maybe asking for a bit much, but there was even the time I offered tickets to see the Wonderbolts.

The Wonderbolts. The group of pegasus ponies you claim to idolize with every thread of your being, and the only ponies you seem to call more awesome than yourself.

Yet besides this, you still turned me down. I was shocked at the response you gave, and I never did go myself. Instead I sold the tickets, and thankfully became eligible for a refund. The tickets I got were extremely good seats, and I had to pay quite the pretty penny to get them.

With every rejection you gave, I began to think of some sort of reason as to why you would. For each occasion before the Wonderbolt offer, with time I was able to eliminate the thought from my mind.

But to reject a friendly offer to something you loved?

I was at an utter and complete whirlwind of confusion onto not only why you would do such a thing, but how? It’s as if I was given an opportunity to dine for free at Canterlot’s most exquisite restaurant, or attend one of their pristine fashion shows with a front row ticket.

The night following the offer was one of restlessness as I contemplated the reasoning behind your actions. I began to weigh the positives and negatives, an imaginary balance appearing in my mind as I placed ideas within each one.

Alas, one of the ideas struck me more forcefully than others. The very idea was even a bit unrealistic and quite childish in nature, but certain possible given the situation I suppose.

Perhaps you just plain don’t like me.

I’ll admit, the thought of one of my friends not really liking me is something that really strikes me in the core, my heart and soul. To seem unlikeable to any pony is merely how the world turns, it is part of life. To strive to be a pony liked by all is an unreasonable request. Anypony would realize that the attainability of this sort of goal would require one to stray farther and farther away from one’s true self. As much as I liked others, I will always hold to my true nature, even if some may not approve of it.

I can handle a stranger not liking me, after all, I don’t have any intrinsic value placed on them.

But to have a pony dislike me who I once trusted and thought of as a close friend? The very thought made me dwell on what I considered a friend to truly be. In essence, I began to understand that perhaps the whole idea of friends forever was merely a hoax, an untruthful statement, and a lie which so many believed to be true. How could I tell somepony like Pinkie Pie that? It would break her little heart.

I couldn’t be angry with Rainbow Dash for how she felt. Oh how I wish she didn’t actually feel this way towards me, but I suppose that is life. Friends come and friends go, and there is nothing I can really do about that.
But if this is the case, why am I still thinking about her? Why is Rainbow Dash still consistently on my mind more often than not? Surely this cannot be a romantic sort of thing right?

…right?

Perhaps I’ve just become so self-absorbed in my own thoughts about the manner where I simply can’t let it go. I need to know the reason why she doesn't like me, and if I don’t figure it out sooner or later, I am going to lose my mind!
Knock knock

What in Equestria? Today was one of my off days, usually nopony knows to disturb me during one of these days. Besides, with all the diligence I have put into my work recently, I deserved a day to myself.

“Rarity… are you in there?”

My heart stopped dead in its tracks, figuratively of course, as literally would cause me to die on the spot. A conflicting sense of action filled my thoughts as I thought of a course to take. Do I really want to talk to a pony who seemingly doesn’t like me? What positive outcome could that have?

She might be in need of help Rarity, remember your element.

Oh curse my element, I don’t think I can ever say no to a pony in need.

“I’m on my way down, hang on a second!”

As I made my way down the stairs, I thought of ways I could approach all of her recent denials of my offers. How exactly one politely asks somepony why he or she doesn’t like oneself isn’t the easiest thing to do, and I had no idea on how to pull it off.

Then again, the mere fact that Rainbow Dash came to see me might have meaning in itself. If you don’t like somepony, I would assume you wouldn’t go out to see them… right?

I reached my door and stood there for a moment, feeling very conflicted about my next move. One half of my mind was telling me to ignore Rainbow altogether and say I was feeling under the weather. But this would only be a short term solution and merely delay the inevitable.

Here goes nothing.

“Oh hello Rainbow Dash. What brings you here today?” Ick. The way I said that made her seem more of a client to me than a former friend.

I watched as Rainbow wore a puzzled expression on her face, but beneath that I could sense something rather unexpected in the mare. It was a feeling of emotion I usually didn’t see in her ever.

Doubt.

Not only doubt however, but there was a large amount of nervous energy radiating from the mare. If I wasn’t worried about the situation myself, now I was also curious onto why she had come here.

“Um… well. There are a two things I sort of what to tell you. Could I come in?”

How polite of you Rarity. You have a guest show up on your doorstep and you don’t even offer them to come inside. I need to make a mental note to remember to do this for everypony from now on.

I motioned inside to Rainbow, and she obliged, rather uneasily though. She even went as far as to wipe her feet on the doormat to make sure she didn’t dirty my floor, which was an act that stunned me so. Never in a million eons would I have guessed I would see her do that, and I was awfully certain that this was the first time she had done this.

“Come, take a seat if you’d like. Can I get you anything?”

Rainbow shook her head back and forth lightly, “Nothing for me. Thank you though.” I knew this wasn’t definitely the Rainbow Dash I have known all this time, but I welcomed the graciousness she had. Where was this version of her all this time?

We both sat down on one of my plush white couches, both of us unsteady on what to say next. I gently made a hypothetical nudge to get her going on what she wanted to tell me. She seemed to notice it, as she cleared her throat before beginning.

“First off… I want to apologize for rejecting all those offers you made me to spend time with you. I know you meant well, and really I would have accepted all of them, but I had my reasons in denying them.”

I already had no idea what to expect when she started to speak, but I was already taken quite back in what she had said. Not only was she giving me the apology that I didn’t even think I wanted, but she was also going to finally answer my question onto why she was denying me all this time.

“Which leads to my second question…”

I had my hoofs folded flat against my lap and gestured for her to continue. It wasn’t very difficult to tell that she was really nervous about the matter at hand, and she seemed tremendously uneasy on what she was going to reveal to me. I tried to soften my gaze towards her, making as much as an attempt as I could to make it comfortable. But in reality, there really wasn’t much I could do in making the situation less like scratching on a chalkboard.

“… Well see I have a couple of days open next week. So I was curious if you would like to go on a date with me? Perhaps we could see a movie, or have a nice dinner somewhere. I have a few… Rares? Rares are you okay?”

It was as if all the tiny complex gears in my noggin decided to all roam to life at the very same time. I kid you not, if you were to examine me in my current state, I think steam would be pouring out of my ears.

Everything clicked and made perfect sense to me now.

Rainbow Dash didn’t hate me in the slightest. In fact, it was the complete opposite of that! At this point I was overjoyed that the mare before me was still my friend. Differences aside, I would still be relatively crushed if she decided not to have me as a friend anymore. Rainbow Dash was a nice and beautiful mare at heart, and that was enough for me.

It was the second part of what she said which had caught me completely off guard.

I blinked as I finally took notice of a cyan colored hoof waving in front of my face. Rainbow noticed my sudden realization of where I was, and stopped, although she still wore a look of confusion and worry. I suddenly felt a ton of guilt as she continued waiting for a response, her demeanor becoming less and less positive as time went on. For a pony as quick as she was, she seemed to also presume that one’s answers to her questions should be just as fast, so I wasn’t exactly helping her in that department.

“I..,” was all I choked out, and as I did I could already see the fear of rejection in Rainbow’s eyes. It was nearly identical to the look I gave her when she rejected my offer to see the Wonderbolts with her. There was no way I could let her experience this same pain I felt.

“If you don’t want to I understand, really I…”

“I would love to go!”

If there was a time I wish I could turn my brain into a camera to capture any scene I wanted, this was one of them. Rainbow did a complete 180 and suddenly was beaming at me with her usual swagger and charm, although it seemed to be amplified twofold. It was the cutest thing in the world to see her so excited.

Wait wait wait… did I call Rainbow Dash cute? I never saw her as being cute before.

Rainbow scooted over and wrapped me in a huge loving embrace, to which I couldn’t help but return with a gleeful smile of my own.

“Really? You will!?" I nodded lightly, which was enough of an answer for her. "Awesome! Thank you thank you thank you!!” I merely watched as Rainbow rocketed up into the air, cringing a bit as she started to fly around, narrowly missing my chandelier which hung above the room.

“Don’t thank me dear. I’d like to see if this would work out.” But I realized that I was talking to an empty room, my front door as wide open as the hinges on it could possibly go. I chuckled to myself as I went over to close it, a speck of cyan dotting the partly cloudy sky as I looked out.

I went back and sat down, looking straight in front of me at nothing in particular as I gathered my thoughts.

All this time, I had become more and more susceptible to the idea that Rainbow wasn’t my friend anymore. My only real backing I had for this idea was that she rejected any friendly proposal I made towards her. Oh was I happy to know I was a hundred percent wrong!

With as much romantic fluff as I tend to read, how could I have missed the signs she gave me of a potential love interest? Denying the invitations I provided her wasn’t due to a disliking of me, it was all nervousness. Rainbow was merely hesitant to spend time with me because she wasn’t sure about her feelings. Any romancer would see these signs right in front of them, I was always able to predict what happens in the novels I read. For some reason, the memories of these books completely skipped my mind when I thought about Rainbow.

Nevertheless there is now a larger question for me to embark on answering. Rainbow basically presented her heart on a silver platter for me… what is a lady to do with an offer like that? To be fair, I never pictured her in that light, or any mare in this fashion. The whole idea of dating a mare seemed awfully strange to me, probably because I had never envisioned myself doing such a thing. But I’m an open-minded person to a degree, and I would be willing to give it a try.

What I am certain of now, is that hopefully this entire thing works out for the best. The least I could do is try and not overthink things again.

Who knows what’ll happen if I do?