What It Means To Me

by DarkZonker


Magic

“Anon, what’s magic like on Earth?” Twilight asked, nonchalant.

I opened my mouth to answer but stopped short. Before, I would have said that magic didn’t exist, or that it was a ridiculous concept entirely. Now though, I wasn’t sure. Living with Ponyville’s resident princess for the last month after falling into this alternate universe had changed my perspectives. The powers these ponies possessed were strange indeed and I had been hard pressed to accept that what they were doing was magic at all.

The cool breeze ruffled my jacket as the two of us sat on one of the spikes jutting out of the massive crystal starburst capping Twilight’s castle. I nursed the mug of steaming tea, its heat radiating into my hands. The dichotomy of the cool air and warm mug made my fingertips tingle.

We had been watching the sunset in silence, as we had for the last two weeks. Sometimes I talked about home, or my friends and family. Other times, Twilight told me about the new place I had literally dropped into. Initially, she was overzealous in her enthusiasm, constantly hounding me about information about everything I knew. Thankfully her friends managed to talk her into calming down and learning at a speed I could handle.

“Different,” I finally concluded. Twilight tilted her head to look at me, one eyebrow raised in a question.

I smiled, confusing her brought irritation which was honestly pretty amusing to me. "It's not quite the same here, it's a little more subtle."

“It’s different for everyone,” I continued. “Some people find magic in stage performers-”

“Like Trixie?” Twilight interrupted, her confusion getting the better of her.

“Kind of. Back home, there are some people who use sleight of hand and distractions to make the illusion of magic,” I filled in. To illustrate, I pulled a gold bit out of my jacket pocket, showed it to Twilight, closed it in my hands, then opened them again, this time empty.

“Wait! What did you do with that bit?” Twilight interrogated, her eyes scouring my hands and sleeves. I chuckled and reached over to her nearest ear and with a flourish from my wrist pulled my arm back, revealing the bit once again.

“Okay, you’re going to have to teach me that,” Twilight conceded, smiling with me.

I gave another chuckle. “That might be a little hard without hands and sleeves,” I said, flipping the bit into the air with my thumb. I caught it mid-air and shoved it back into my pocket.

“As I was saying,” Twilight gave a blush at that, “some people find magic in illusions, others find it in creation, or socializing, or music, or science, or even sex,” I waggled my eyebrows at Twilight, causing her to blush even deeper and give a staccato cough as she shuffled on her seat uncomfortably.

“I can understand how people would find magic in these situations, but I don’t share their views,” I looked ahead somberly, taking a sip of my tea.

Twilight hummed, not quite in agreement but not in disagreement either. “Magic for me is freedom,” she whispered, the wind nearly stealing her words completely.

Now it was my turn to be confused. “How so?”

“I can go anywhere I set my mind to, do anything if I’m clever enough, obstacles are non-issues,” her voice rose steadily, “I can save lives and help my friends. I have no shackles binding me when I use my magic.” Her last sentence lost all its previous strength, returning to a resigned whisper. Her own mug levitated to her lips, encased in a magenta glow.

I nodded slowly, scratching my stubble. My fingernails audibly plinked with each follicle they ran across.

“You never said what magic is to you, Anon,” Twilight turned her head to look at me, I met her gaze. “You said what it might mean to all the other humans, but not to you.”

It wasn’t often that we got philosophical, maybe once or twice since they had started watching the sunset, but when we did, Twilight got serious. Almost like she was starved for it in Ponyville. I tapped my fingers rhythmically along my mug as I searched for something to say.

“When I was younger, I thought I had found it through religion, but as I grew up and lived my life, I found that to be no longer true,” Bitterness had laced its way into my voice. I stopped a minute to compose myself.

Twilight remained statuesque the entire time, only the breeze that lightly ruffled her mane showed that time hadn’t stopped. I watched as the crest of the sun dipped below the horizon. The moon would rise soon, that was usually the cue that our evening conversations were over.

“In college, I learned that the smaller you got with things the more confusing it became. Particles being there but not there at the same time, moving but not moving, being everywhere in an orbit at once. The act of simply observing something changing the outcome,” I took another sip of my tea. “But that was too clinical, too sterile for me.”

“I think that just now, I finally figured out what my magic is,” I intoned. Twilight broke her watch and turned to horizon to watch the last dregs of sunlight drain away. The breeze felt a little sharper, more pronounced.

“Magic, to me, is living. All the tiny minutiae that goes into the day. My alarm in the morning, the ache in my knees when I stretch. In the evening, when I have discussions with a friend over a cup of tea.” I nodded, not for anyone but myself.

“That’s surprisingly simple for you,” Twilight smirked.

“I’m not a glamorous person. I thought you would have figured that out by now,” I shrugged.

Twilight shuffled as a gust of wind hit. She could see the silvery glow of the moon start to peek over the Everfree forest.

“I would have thought too,” Twilight agreed, with a slight shiver. “But you’re an enigma, Anon. Everytime I think I have you figured out, I find out something new that shatters that image.”

“People are like that sometimes,” I said as I slipped out of my jacket and tossed it around Twilight’s withers. She gave me a brief smile of thanks and nodded in agreement.

“You’re something I’ve never had to deal with before. It seems like with most ponies I meet, they’re so established with who they are it’s easy to figure out how they tick. But you… you’re different,” Twilight cocked her head slightly at me.

“Not so different I think, just fresh perspective,” I said as I reached over into my jacket that Twilight had proceeded to cocoon herself in. I pulled out the golden bit once again and held it out to her flat on my palm.

She stared blankly at the dulling but still shiny coin, the seal of the Royal Sisters face up. A magenta aura encased the bit and it levitated in front of Twilight’s muzzle.

“Just fresh perspective, Twilight,” I repeated as I climbed onto the trunk of the starburst and slid down to the waiting rooftop. I hung off the shingles and dropped down to the balcony with a dull thud. With one final glance, I saw Twilight pressing the coin between her two hooves, manually trying to replicate my earlier trick, her face scrunched up in concentration. Kudos to her for not going the easy way with some kind of spell, I thought as I entered the castle.

Just then, my ear began to itch horribly, like some kind of bug had gotten under the skin. As I scratched, my fingertips brushed against something cold and hard. My nail caught the edge of it as it painlessly exited my flesh. The itching left as soon as it had come as I stared at a dull gold coin, with Perspective laser etched into the face.

“Sneaky sneaky,” I muttered to myself, but I couldn’t be mad.

I rolled the coin along my knuckles as I walked to my room, positioning it on top of my thumb just as I reached my bedroom door.

I flicked it into the air, light glinting into my eyes as it spun making a perfect sphere with how fast it rotated. I caught it as it came back down and slapped it on the back of my waiting hand.

The End