As the sun rose on Ponyville, light streamed through the windows of the library on Twilight as she slept. She scrunched her nose at the light disturbing her slumber. She almost got up when it dimmed over her. The neurons in her brain slowly started to fire wondering for a second why it suddenly seemed darker despite that the fact that it was probably early morning. The navy maned mare slowly opened her eyes to see Princess Celestia standing in front of her, slightly silhouetted by the light pouring through the window. The white coated alicorn had a look of anger and disapproval on her face. Twilight quickly sat up by the surprise appearance of her fellow princess.
“P-princess Celestia!” She yelped out and looked at her rather compromising surroundings, “I...I can, um...”
“Stop,” The rainbow maned princess said firmly, raising her left front hoof in gesture, “Before you start, I already know you performed the spell.”
“You...you do?”
“Yes. Naturally born alicorns like myself and Luna are somewhat in tune with the flow of magic in this world and a powerful enough spell, like the one you performed, raises alarm bells as it were.”
Twilight looked at her with interest to learn something new but with a glare Celestia shot her, the look changed back to regret and guilt.
“When you performed it last night, Luna was half tempted to neglect her duties and stop the ritual altogether. I however, stopped her, suggested we wait, and only step in if the ritual lasted too long. I’m proud that you stopped the spell before it lasted too long,” Princess Celestia paused for a moment before continuing in a firmer and sterner tone, “I am however, severely disappointed that you would even consider performing this spell.”
“I...I was..” Twilight stammered before she was cut off by Celestia once again.
“Twilight, I-I mean, I just...What were you thinking?!” She said losing her calm, “Do you realize what you could’ve done? What could’ve happened to you or Equestria or even the world?! This isn’t something like using a spell to change a creature’s diet or transforming something into something else! This is playing with the balance of life and death! If you performed this spell when you were still a unicorn and my student, I...I would’ve had to imprison you for such a thing and that’s even considering that the spell was even successful!”
The celestial alicorn got to her hooves and began to pace as she vented her frustrations over the young alicorn’s choice.
“These ancient spells are extremely particular; every symbol, syllable, and shape has to be perfect! If you got even the tiniest detail wrong, you could’ve summoned some arch-demon from the underworld that could’ve plunged Equestria into a hellish dimension! The fact that you managed to perform it properly has equally horrible possibilities! If you didn’t end the summoning spell and kept Death contained, ponies couldn’t die and those that should be dying would continue to suffer in pain or worse! WHY?! Why did you do this, Twilight?!”
Celestia stopped her pacing and stared at her former student with furious eyes. Twilight’s ears flattened and she lowered her head from the princess’s gaze. She was right. Her spell could’ve just as easily backfired, not just on her but the entire world but...she couldn’t entirely say she regretted it. She placed a hoof on Spike’s body and finally admitted.
“I just wanted to see Spike again.”
Celestia’s expression softened from the response and looked mournfully at her former protégé, as she continued to speak.
“I know what I did was wrong. I realize that now but...to know I could do something to change what happened...to see him at least once more, I...I just couldn’t...”
“Twilight,” Celestia softly said drawing the lavender alicorn’s tearful gaze.
She slowly approached Twilight and wrapped her hooves and wings around her. Twilight reciprocated the embrace and rubbed her head against her mentor’s chest, softly sobbing into it. Celestia couldn’t help but get a bit tearful herself.
“I’m sorry,” Celestia said, “What you did isn’t easily forgotten...but I can understand why you did it.”
“How do you do it?”
“Do what?”
“You’ve existed for centuries. You’ve known several different ponies and seen them grow old and die,” Twilight sobbed, “How do you get over grief?”
“Oh, my dear Twilight,” Celestia started, “I don’t.”
Twilight’s eyes went wide by this comment. She looked up at the flowing maned pony.
“I know that many believe that with how long I’ve lived that I have simply become numb to grief and that I’m completely unflappable but I’m not. Though I may not always show it in public, I do cry. I weep and mourn everypony I have ever held dear when they pass on into the next world. I have wished many times that I could grant them more life or give them the immortality I possess but I can’t,” Celestia explained, “Death of someone close isn’t something you just get over like losing a favorite book. It’s something that we carry with us. It’s like a wound that seems to heal but can be reopened when you least expect it...yet it does get better.”
Twilight nodded sadly.
“We who live on after those who have left must do our best to carry on and keep them in our thoughts, even when it’s hard. There is also something that I have found great solace in my immortality.”
“What’s that?” Twilight asked.
Celestia smiled, “I can show you but first, why don’t we put ‘Spike’ back in the hall where you had him.”
Twilight looked at the cadaver sadly and magically bundled the corpse back up. After returning Spike to a coffin in an area set up for the dragon’s wake, the young princess followed her elder through the crystal halls before arriving at the front doors of her castle.
“This is what I continue to live for Twilight,” She gestured with a flicker of magic opening the doors to reveal Ponyville.
The pair looked at the sight of the sun shining over the little village and ponies going about their normal day. Twilight looked perplexed, not quite grasping what Celestia meant.
“Ponyville is what you live for?”
“No, Twilight. It’s what Ponyville represents,” Celestia began to elaborate, “Hundreds of years ago, Ponyville was a struggling settlement that tried its best to stay alive but with some time, effort, and love, it is now a thriving community where ponies can come to build friendships, loves, and lives no matter where they came from. Do you understand now, Twilight?”
Twilight tapped her hoof to her forehead, still trying to grasp Princess Celestia’s meaning. After a long moment, it dawned on her.
“Progress.”
“Exactly. Change is difficult and can bring pain with it but it can also bring wonderful things as well. I have seen times of hardship and famine change into ages of wonder and prosperity,” Celestia enlightened, “I also live to see the effect those of ponies who pass leave on the future. Great heroes inspiring descendants to honor their memory and follow in their hoofsteps. The work of artists and scholars effecting or influencing future minds in their works. I will always miss my friends and I grieve for those who I’ve lost but I will remember them fondly and look forward to the impact they leave behind with those that I still have. It is something that I hope you can take to heart, Twilight.”
She looked over to her to see the lavender alicorn crying but for the first time in the last few hours or last few days, they were tears of joy, understanding, and acceptance. Twilight turned to her with a smile and tried to wipe some tears away.
“That does help,” Twilight said, “Thank you, Princess.”
Celestia smiled and held her once more.