Equestria Fun Fact: Being in a secret society is considered a treasonous activity therefore punishable with execution. Conversely all ponies are members of a secret society. Likewise magic is forbidden and any pony caught using magic will be executed. Also all ponies can use magic. If you find this puzzling please apply the Voodoo Science mentioned last chapter on your screen until it all makes sense. You might need a lot of chicken blood for this one.

**One quick dash to their secret society to get information on their mission later**

Twilight Sparkle clone number 5,463,283 ducked for cover behind the remains of the old sludge packing/food storage plant from a barrage of lasers. Using their information, the group tracked Starlight Glimmer to an old toy making plant. The one that made C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. approved cheap knock-off pony dolls of the main six troubleshooters. Not the good ones you're thinking of, but the other ones. With the crappy heads that always came off, that you could never reattach no matter how much glue and tape you put on it. Never mind that the color was always wrong or they all had the same manes, or their cutie marks were sometimes not the right ones, or they didn't have one at all, and let us not forget how they all looked the same. With that iodic expression on their faces. I swear the box was more colorful than the toys that were inside the...Oh...Anyway.

Laser beams pounded the wall Twilight Sparkle and her team was hiding behind, Providing very few openings to return fire. She was prepared for Luna sympathizers. prepared for terrorists, even prepared for a nuclear weapon. But this...This was too much even for her.

"What can we do?" shouted Fluttershy clone number 3,688,757. Firing off A.N.G.E.L.. "We're gonna lose our barrier any minute."

"We better think of something really fast." said Rainbow Dash clone number 8,432,114. "They will be here soon."

"Nutzen Sie sie! Die Ponys zu töten." they shouted at the troubleshooters in their strange language.

"Vampire Nazi zombie ponies from Tartarus." said Pinkie clone number 20,643,671. "Who would have thought we would be facing Vampire Nazi zombie ponies from Tartarus."

"Talk about overkill." Twilight said hitting one of them. "I can't think of any worst clique to kill us."

"Really?" shouted Starlight Glimmer at Discord. "Vampire Nazi zombie ponies from Tartarus? You the lord of chaos and that was the best you can do?"

The two of them were in the back of the building trying to find the exit. It was a brick wall room, with a couple of forgotten C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. propaganda posters tacked to the walls, and a few barrels marked 'C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. approved toxic waste' scattered around the room. Both of them were trying to open the giant wall cover the two had tracked down that lead to the outside world. To the LUNA pc jr. that they were desperately trying to reach in hope of bringing everything back to normal. Though to be honest, Starlight Glimmer was beginning to lose track of just what was normal anymore. She was starting to feel that the alternate Equestria was getting to her.

"Well don't look at me." said Discord trying to get the metal plate cover opened. "Since we came here my chaos magic isn't working to well. I think because of the insanity already around us is twisting it to even more extremes. I have a sneaky suspicion that this alternate world is sucking up my chaos."

"Wir haben die Ratgeber Miss in die Enge getrieben. Was sind Ihre Bestellungen?" said one of the Vampire Nazi ponies as he saluted to her. "Sie Obiviously kann ein Wort nicht verstehen, was ich sage. wäre es in Ordnung, wenn ich dein Blut trank? Ach und Fluttershy ist das beste pony."

"I can't understand a word he is saying." she said to Discord. "Do you understand what he is saying?"

"Ich möchte dein Blut trinken. Und das Finale zur Saison fünf enttäuscht viele Menschen. Und ich bin ein Gelee-dognut Fräulein ." The pony continued on. "Und der Walking Tot Wird überschätzt."

"Whatever." she said brushing her hoof at him. "Just go do whatever your kind does to stop them. Drink their blood, eat their brains, go nuts."

"Auf einmal Miss Glimmer." the pony said. "Seig Heil." it saluted with a flourish, before marching away to join the battle.

"And a good breakfast to you as well." Starlight Glimmer said sarcastically. "We're not gonna make it." she said turning to Discord. "C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. will find us, and use us to clean their food vats, or execute us for being a traitor. Which might actually be better after seeing their food vats. Were doomed! Both of us!"

"You know a little more positivity would be helpful in this situation." said Discord finding the cover starting to loosen.

"This is no good." screamed Applejack clone number 5,789,940. "Even when we hit them they still keep coming. Where is Fluttershy?" she asked as she looked around. "We could really use A.N.G.E.L. right about now."

"She is over their." said Rarity clone number 8,432,114. "Trying to fix Spike so he can help us."

Twilight glanced over in the direction Rarity was pointing. She could see Fluttershy holding a wrench repeatedly pounding on Spike's head. Yelling "Work you stupid machine. WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! Work!"

"'WHAM!' Just 'WHAM!' A 'WHAM!" few 'WHAM!' more 'WHAM!' adjustments. 'WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!'" she continued on ignoring the pleas for help and medical assistance. Professional medical assistance.

"Thank you for your report." said C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. on their communicator. "Unfortunately your team is not equipped to handle the additional threat. Please do not engage the additional evil Luna mutant sympathizers. Proceed on your original mission. Another mission will be scheduled as soon as possible. Have a wonderful day."

"Aw come on." said Pinkie Pie. "Turn those frowns upside-down. As your happiness officer it is my job to ensure your moral is on the up and up."

"No reason to be all frowny face, remember bad morals make a bad mission. So who wants to sing the smile song with me?" she said, ignoring the looks on their faces.

"Come on everypony smile, smile, smile. Fill my heart up with sunshine, sunshine." Pinkie sang to the horrified group as they huddled behind the rapidly disintegrating barrier. And also to hold onto Rainbow Dash to keep from trying to jump over the wall into the path of the lethal laser.

"Was damit zum Teufel sind sie? Singen sie?" asked one of the Nazi ponies. Hearing the song from Pinkie. "Warum sind sie singen Lieder in einer Zeit wie diese? Die man von ihnen tut es?"

"Die diejenige, die rosa wie Power Rangers ist. Denken Sie daran, die zeigen? Der gelbe war mein Favorit." said another. Stopping to answer.

"Was! Die weiße Ranger war das beste, er hatte die coolsten Zoar. Sie wissen nicht, was Sie reden!" A third one replied angrily. Joining in the conversation.

The group watched the enemy ponies argue angrily over whatever it was they were arguing about. They really didn't understand any of it. "Maybe we can sneak away while their fighting? whispered Applejack. "We can tell C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. they ran away and we lost them."

"SSSHH!" said FP389 suddenly appearing in front of the group. They wondered just where she had been the entire time. When before anyone could ask she leaped over the wall, heading straight towards their enemies.

Author's Note:Due to the teen rating we have to maintain we cannot talk about the upcoming scene. Because of this, we will not talk about the mountains of blood being spilt, nor shall we talk about all those flying heads, the body parts being tossed around like a discarded doll with screams of pain and mercy filling the air.

Instead I want you to fill your mind with a beautiful image of a rolling field of grass with a beautiful lake in the middle, A majestic deer enters to take a sip from this pristine lake...FP389 smiled evilly as she slowly lowered the chainsaw onto the screaming vampire Nazi zombie pony from Tartarus as he begged in his strange language...Whoopsie! One got through, my bad. Puppies! Picture of a group of puppies running around your yard doing all sorts of adorable things. Okay the scene should be over now, we shall return you to the story as it continues on...

Rainbow dash put her hooves over her mouth as she fought the urge to get sick. While the rest of the ponies watched FP389 with a horrified expression on their faces. To stunned to say anything, they were stuck to the ground watching the gore splattered FP389 stand quietly in the center of the carnage and munch on a piece of cloth somehow acquired.

"Is-Is everypony okay?" asked Twilight. Trying to get control of herself. "Everyone sound off."

"Good." said Twilight, "Let's take a moment to regroup then will charge the old building."

"They stopped them all." said Starlight Glimmer almost shouting she felt. "In a moment they will be here. Can you conjure a cyanide pill or something." She was nearly hysterical and she felt the waves of panic roll through her.

"Calm down." said Discord. Feeling the bolts that attached the cover to the wall finally start to give way. "I think..I almost...GOT IT!" he finished as the metal piece flew off the wall landing on the ground with a loud bang. "HA! I knew I would get this opened." he slightly bowed as he thrust his hand out. "After you m'lady." he said mockingly.

The tunnel was long and dark, disappearing into the blackness before the two. "Where does it lead to?" she asked.

"Away from here, and one step closer to Luna and fixing all of this. That's all that matters."

With a silent prayer to whoever might be listening. Starlight Glimmer climbed into it and crawled into the blackness, vanishing she crawled on, with a dragonesque following her. Into the complete darkness.

PARANOIA:EQUESTRIA

by Opium4TmassS

Chapter: C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. has noticed that nopony has sent any complaints her way. C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. must have imagined it then. C.E.L.E.S.T.I.A. will continue the chapters as she was doing. Isn't this fun?