{Western Front Day 2}
“A rolling golem gathers no rust.” said Blitzcrank as the army marched on. The Western Front by comparison had an easier first day, even though it was in the blazing heat of the desert. Azir paid no attention to the exhaustion of the army, until the sun went down, mostly because he lived in this situation for many centuries. Azir and Nasus were actually enjoying themselves, mostly because of having a new desert. All of Shurima’s deserts were marked on maps and the composition of the sand was known down to a single grain. The sands of the Mild West, on the other hand, were entirely unmarked and, at least to the Shurimans, unknown. The force marched on after the sun rose, until they reached the last settled large town before they entered territory marked by the Yaks; Appleloosa.
“So this is gonna be the last of friendly territory we see for a while, right?” asked Vi.
“Yeah,” answered Rainbow Dash. “It’s a quaint town, but it’s alright.”
“At least it is a town,” said Shaco. “Means more murder victims than a village…”
“Shaco!” yelled Pinkie Pie. “I thought I told you no murdering ponies or people!”
“Ah, and so the gods fuck me upside the head again.” he muttered to himself.
“Well, let’s go into the town.” said Vi.
“Halt.” said Nasus, stepping out in front of the group.
“What’s up Nasus?” asked Vi.
“The Emperor and his Allies demand we set up camp outside the town. Something about the population not being required to quarter soldiers in their houses without the owner’s consent in this country.” stated Nasus.
“That’s nice, now how does it affect us?” asked Shaco.
“No one is allowed to step into town until camp is set up.” replied Nasus. “And you are all part of the army on course to the Western Front, and as a result, you are all required to help. I do not like it one bit as much as you do, but the Emperor’s orders.”
“Well, I don’t serve-” said Vi.
“The Mayor of Piltover also said so.” interrupted Caitlyn, walking up to her long time friend.
“I don’t serve anyone!” said Shaco. Gnar promptly punches Shaco in the leg.
“But I’m your summoner, and I am under the rule of the royal sisters, so that means you have to listen!” said Pinkie Pie.
“That… actually made sense.” said Rainbow.
“Wait, she’s always that nonsensical?” asked Caitlyn. “Shit.”
“I could have answered that question, but apparently you figured out the answer.” said Shaco.
“Well... guess we gotta set up camp.” said Rainbow Dash.
Meanwhile, in an undisclosed location…
A pony draped in a black cloak was standing in a ruined castle. He looked at the script of paper, knowing his entire intentions full and well… to bring back an old friend.
“I remember when you were warped to that terrible dimension by those elements of harmony, they got me too… but I didn’t warp or change, simply was weakened. Now, you shall return.” He channels into the runes, and in a flash of light, a humanoid creature made of shadows. Blades are mounted on its would be arms, but it lacks legs, simply floating in the air. It eyes glow a venomous white.
“Ah... it’s been many years since I came back to my original dimension…” said the creature. “It’s always a good time to see you again, my lord.”
“I am going to be needing you after time,” said the pony. “Equestria is about to start crumbling, fighting a war on two fronts when the country hasn’t been to war in over one thousand years.”
“I hope you are right, my lord. For I finally shall regain full control of the creating body again, and when I do, I am going to ensure that I shall destroy the hierarchy of the ‘royal family’ along with any who dare oppose us.”
“Equestria isn’t weak enough yet…” said the pony. “We must wait for the time to strike. Right when they are at their most ignorant.”
“Very well… the light is fading.”
After three hours, camp was made just to the west of Appleloosa, so that the camp would act as a barrier between the town and the approaching battlefield. The army was about to sprint to the town after camp was set, however the Shurimans stayed in the camp, mostly to keep watch but to study the new desert as well. Braeburn was standing at the western side of the town, looking towards the ensemble of people and ponies running towards the town. He knew what was coming, exactly how he would fail, and could think of only one thing to say to sum the moment up.
“I don’t get paid enough to do this…” he said, paying special attention to the group. The group soon got within what he judged as ‘earshot.’ “Welcome to App…” he said before getting run over by a Blitzcrank in overdrive alongside half of the Valoran-Equestrian army. “...leoosa…” he ended before fainting in a Braeburn-sized hole in the dirt of the Appleloosan ground.
“Finally, time for a break after all that bull-crap!” said Vi, staying in the back of this push as she knew that the group would get squashed by this massive force if they got anywhere close to the front of it. “Do you think they could’ve held us back longer?”
“I know right!” said Rainbow. “Those guys are so slow with the set-up and everything!”
“I’ve watched military camps take much longer to build,” said Shaco. “But then again, I struck right when they were about to finish, and I killed them before they finished…”
“Shaco, when the war’s over, I’m delivering you myself to the Piltover Insane Asylum.” said Caitlyn. “If Vi had her way with things, public executions would be brought back just for you and Jinx.”
“That is true, on my punch-o-meter, I’d say I want to punch you at a fourteen. And it normally only goes to ten.” added Vi.
“Oh what a joy,” replied Shaco. “I’ll make sure to disappear right when that armistice is signed then. Just to make sure you all can’t do it, I might even do it before or after the armistice is signed.”
“We’ll talk about Shaco’s judgement later,” said Caitlyn.
“Preferably with me outside of a 100-mile radius from you two.” added Shaco.
“Not gonna happen Shaco, now we have someone who can warp to you whenever you do warp,” said Caitlyn, gesturing to Pinkie Pie. “Aka, your ‘match.’”
“What? Her?” he asked. “Bah, she follow me everywhere.”
“Actually, I can!” said Pinkie Pie.
For the first time in his entire life, Shaco put on a face underneath his mask of actual worry. “Weeeeeeeeell shit.” he said, realizing she could follow him everywhere he warped and he couldn’t hurt her. “I might as well be hanged now, but instead I’m being sadistically tortured Nocturne style. Gods help me.” The whole group starts to laugh at this.
“View it as a last chance for redemption,” said Vi. “Be good for this war, and Piltover might pardon you. Kill one person and you’ll wind up in that jail cell regardless of torture or not. And that jail cell will have her visiting every day.”
“That isn’t legal. In any Valoran city state, and you know it.” replied Shaco.
“I beg to differ,” said Caitlyn “I’ve talked to the mayor. And she had the representatives legalize it.”
“Fuck. you.” said Shaco, patting his arm twice, flipping the double bird, and finally biting his thumb at the Sheriff and Enforcer.