Celestia sighed inwardly, counting down the minutes remaining to the end of Day Court. Court sessions only seemed to last forever, after all. She’d commissioned some very expensive timepieces for the express purpose of tracking the phenomenon, and had concluded that time did not slow down in the least, even during the most boring of presentations. It was one of those same timepieces that kept her sane now by reminding her that time continued to pass at its normal rate.
Today in particular was arduous for her, as Hearts and Hooves Day meant various well-intentioned but ill-advised admirers delivering various gaudy gifts and fabulous floral displays to her, hoping they might be the one to catch her eye. The gifts were repurposed, as there was only so much candy one could consume, and the schoolchildren of Canterlot were certainly happy with the excess. The flowers (those that were not edible) were used to decorate the dining room for the castle staff.
Another minute passed, and she cheered the clock on, urging it to do so again. It stubbornly refused, unheeding of her silent pleas. If anything, it seemed to crawl even slower than before.
“—and that is why this one percent increase is completely unacceptable, Your Highness—”
He was still talking. Still talking about a minor increase in taxes necessary to fund schools for a nation. More importantly, talking about an increase that had been passed long since, and could not be rescinded anyway since it was factored into the budget for the new year.
But she had to hear him out, even if she wanted to dismiss him as she would any other citizen who wasted her time. He had the ears of too many families to simply ignore, and the last thing she needed was another coup attempt. It had been five centuries since her nobles had last tried, and while that had ended bloodlessly, she wasn’t keen on fielding another. And so, she listened, with a patient smile, as he droned on and on about a trivial matter that neither of them could do anything about.
“We will take your concerns into consideration, Duke Snow. Were there any other pressing matters for today?”
“Well... there was the—”
From behind him, the clock mercifully chimed out the hour, signalling the close of court. She masked her inner glee, favoring him with an apologetic smile instead. “It seems whatever it is will have to wait for now, Duke. I’ll look forward to your next appearance.”
He opened his mouth to protest, but one look at her impassive expression was enough to convince him he would not persuade her. He bowed just enough to show deference, but not quite low enough to be respectful, and then turned and walked to the court entrance.
The rest of the petitioners began to move towards the doors, but the doors opened to admit one, and seeing that one prompted a genuine smile from Celestia.
A little early, Twilight, but you’re a welcome sight regardless.
The young mare waded her way through the crowd, a look of determination on her face.
Hmmmm. Something on her mind.
A nagging sense of deja vu plagued Celestia. She had seen all of this before. Twilight was wearing a well-worn saddlebag. A saddlebag out of which she would pull a box of chocolates, followed by a meticulously crafted card that said ‘for the loveliest Princess in the world’.
Celestia would consume the chocolates later that same evening, the only gift she had kept for herself, while fondly musing on the attentiveness of her student. The card would be kept on her desk for a few years, before being destroyed in one of Philomena's rebirths.
Twilight, however, was about to spend the night weeping into her pillow with a broken heart. In the morning, Celestia would question her, quite innocently, as to what was bothering her, and Twilight would answer with a forced smile that she’d simply had a bad night’s sleep.
These were sad, but immutable facts. What she didn’t have to abide by, however, was the large, smirking, white alicorn walking next to Twilight, phasing through the surrounding ponies like she, or they, did not even exist.
“Decided to reminisce about how it all began, Celestia?” Her mirror image asked, glancing around the room in amusement. “If only you could turn back time, and correct the colossal mistake you made this day.” Celestia’s doppelganger lovingly tussled dream Twilight’s mane, which the young mare did not seem to register. “You know where to find the spell...”
“It doesn’t work that way, and if you were me as you claim, you’d know that,” Celestia responded testily. Sorrow, dread, sadness... all of them had to make way for an all-consuming anger that blossomed in her chest. “Why are you here?”
The smirk disappeared, replaced by a glare that was almost half as fierce as Celestia’s own. “I could ask you the same! In fact, I will! What purpose does this serve? You cannot save her from yourself! This is a part of what shaped the mare you love, for good or ill. This is self-indulgence of the most useless kind,” she spat out, giving Celestia a look of disgust.
It was as though none of the ponies could hear or see Celestia’s mirror while she kept pace with Twilight, though the young mare’s ears did perk up expectantly. Was it possible she could hear Celestia?
“I’ve asked you over and over, begged you, to be just a little selfish for your own sake, and this is how you express it?”
“Leave me alone!” Celestia yelled.
Her double didn’t so much as blink. Twilight’s ears however, clamped against her skull and the startled young mare beat a hasty retreat, leaving tears in her wake.
It was like a bucket of ice cold water had been dumped on Celestia’s head, and another had made its home in her heart. She stared, dumbfounded at the doors through which Twilight had disappeared. Even for a dream, it seemed so much worse now...
“That can’t have been good for her self-esteem,” The doppelganger remarked, looking over its shoulder. “Maybe you should follow her and expla—” Its sentence was cut short when it looked back towards the dais and got a face full of white hoof instead.
Celestia’s punch sent her alternate self through three walls, and it had nary a moment to process what had just happened. Celestia charged forward through the dust, intent on, if nothing else, beating her double to a bloody pulp if she could not make it be quiet.
The mirror image stood up from the wreckage, shaking debris from her coat and wings. “Oh yes, beat yourself up. You are good at that, aren’t you?”
“Enough!” Celestia screamed, aiming at the imposter with a concussive blast.
The blast was answered with a reflective shield, sending the brunt of it into her ceiling, blowing a hole into it three hoofspans wide. Dust and chips of stone erupted from the gaping cavity, falling to the floor.
The fake looked up in surprise. “You’re trying to kill me?”
Celestia fired off three more blasts in quick succession, forcing the other to dodge rather than risk her shield collapsing from the strain.
“This is pointless!” Her double gasped out, and then took to the air. It let out a beam of its own, blackening the ground at Celestia’s hooves and making her jump back in surprise. “I don’t even have a physical form to kill!”
“I don’t care!” Celestia shouted back. “At least here I can get my hooves on you!” She picked up a large chunk of wall in her magic and flung it at the other mare.
“More misplaced selfishness. You really have no idea how to do this, do you?” Not-Celestia deflected the debris with another shield, dropping in a quick dive ending in a punch aimed at Celestia’s chest plate. The blow did little harm, but did knock the wind out of her.
The other mare grasped her shoulders and physically shook her, staring her straight in the eyes. “Let me teach you, then. Selfishness isn’t all bad. You could have taken up with any of those suitors you turned away. Yes, they would have doted on you, and loved you for all the wrong reasons, but they would have loved you. You never did. You never ever did!”
“I-I...” Celestia stammered, not certain how to feel about this sudden change in tactics.
“And the ones who saw you for who you were, those precious, precious few, you turned them away too. Everypony who could have offered you a little happiness. All of them. So many.”
“Wha—”
“And you’re doing it again! You think it’s selfless, and noble. But it’s killing you in a way that time never will.”
“Be quiet!” Celestia finally managed to shout, knocking the hooves of the other away from her. “I will not be tempted in this way!”
“No,” her double said with bitter sadness. “No, you won’t. You’ll let her slip away, just like the others.”
“I said: Be. Quiet!” Celestia screamed out in the Voice, charging forward again and smashing both gold-shod forehooves into the mockery of her face. “I. Have. Had.” she continued to rain down blows on her opponent, all but trampling her foe. “Enough.” she reared up. “Of you!”
She slammed down with all of her weight, but there was nothing left to bear the brunt of her attack.
Whatever her doppelganger had been, it was gone now. She looked around through narrowed eyes, trying to spot the mockery of herself, but after not finding anything for several minutes she relaxed. A little.
Did I beat it?
She looked around, her blood boiling, still wanting to hurt it, to make it be quiet. But there was no evidence it had even been here. For all intents and purposes, it merely appeared that she had destroyed a large section of her castle.
“Tia?”
Celestia whirled about, and for a split second, was certain that she was being confronted by Nightmare Moon. The Nightmare stood at a distance, draconic eyes with an odd look of concern rather than anger. Her posture was... all wrong, showing no signs of aggression.
Celestia stood stock still, fight and flight impulses warring in her mind. Her wings opened wide, her nostrils remained flared, her breathing was ragged and short. Surely this was a trick, possibly by her double, taking the form of her sister to prevent her from fighting back. She had to kill it, had to stop it—
“Tia, calm down!”
For a long moment, neither of them moved.
“Tia?” The Nightmare said, very quietly.
The walls of the castle melted away, along with the image of the Nightmare, leaving her sister behind in its place. Celestia’s wings drooped in sudden exhaustion, and she collapsed against the anomalous blackness that served as ground in the Dreamscape.
Luna just looked at her sister for a time, unsure what to make of what she was seeing. Her sister looked normal, save for the fact that her wings and coat were still covered in the powder of pulverized granite and limestone. She was back to her normal size, her self-image overriding her appearance in the real world, but nevertheless she looked as if she’d just wrestled a hydra.
So much for a quick patrol before bed, then, she thought wryly. Nevertheless, she was glad she’d thought to check the state of her realm before retiring, even if she hadn’t anticipated needing to step in on her sister’s dream in particular.
“Tia?” She said again, not quite daring to approach.
“Lu... do you see it anywhere?”
“See what, exactly?” Luna replied, seeing nothing but the amorphous blackness that formed her realm, dotted with the occasional Dream Bubble.
“Her.” Celestia hissed.
“Tia, perhaps it would help if you told me what’s bothering you,” Luna replied, thoroughly nonplussed.
“She looks like me, she says she is me, but she’s not.” Celestia replied. After a moment, she added: “That sounds crazy, but it’s true. She was just here. I was trying to get rid of her but she disappeared.”
“Errrr... well done, then?” Luna suggested, hopefully.
Celestia raised her head to meet her sister’s eyes, shaking it to indicate her opinion of that statement. “I don’t think she’s gone, not really. You might have scared her off.”
“Tia...” Luna replied, “Do you suppose you could try to make just a little more sense? Was this a changeling, or—”
“She’s the voice.” Celestia said quickly, cutting Luna off. “The one I told you about.”
Immediately, Luna’s expression turned cold and hard. “She was here, manifested in my realm?” A small jet of blue flame spouted from both of her nostrils.
“Yes.”
Luna closed her eyes, focusing her energy inward, and when she opened them, she could see the Dreamscape from nine locations.
Communication was not required, as each of the blue alicorns was but a splinter of the greater whole. One stayed by Celestia’s side, the other eight spread out in every cardinal and intercardinal direction, searching for signs of the maleficent presence.
“Luna?” Celestia inquired.
“One moment, Tia, I need to focus.”
The eyes of her other selves searched far and wide into the darkness, each of them moving at the speed of thought. In a matter of moments they had explored every dream of every sentient being within the boundaries of Equestria, and found no sign of the creature Celestia described.
Luna let out a long-held breath, dispelling her other selves and opening her own eyes. “She appears to have left my realm, presumably retreating to wherever she resides in your mind, Tia.”
Celestia slammed a hoof down, sending ripples outward from the shock of her impact.
Luna just stared at the ground, unsure how to respond. “Sister... are you trying to harm her, or is this the moment you snap and attack me? I would like a little warning, if you’re still sane enough for that.”
Her sister just glared at her, her forehoof trembling in the same spot she’d planted it. After a long, tense moment, she looked away. “No, Lu. I’m fine.”
“Oh, that’s good!” Luna replied, more than a little relieved. Subduing her sister in her own realm would have proven quite simple, of course, but that didn’t mean she would have enjoyed it. She had already begun thinking about how to go about it, however, and was a touch disappointed that she would not need to enact her plans, as she’d already gotten to the part about how her sister would praise her for thinking ahead. But she supposed it was a bit selfish to wish insanity on her sister merely so that she would need to stop her.
It still rankled just a bit, however.
“Do you wish to talk about it?” she finally asked, unsure what else to say.
“No, Lu.”
Luna opened her mouth, then closed it with a snap. Pressing the issue would not help matters. Celestia needed support in a very trying time. She trotted up to her sister, nuzzling the side of her cheek. “Very well. I’d ask you how your night fared, but I think we both know your sleep is troubled. Perhaps you’d like to talk of other, less stressful things? How are Pinkie and Twilight doing?”
Celestia let loose a bitter laugh. “Less stressful... By all means, let’s talk about the voice in my head driving me mad, then.”
“Erm... well, if you wish, but I thought you didn’t wish to talk about it?” Luna replied, tilting her head in confusion.
“Nevermind, Lu. Twilight is... fine. Pinkie is... Pinkie.” Celestia replied. “They are doing well, and will be fine in the future. I’ll be coming home in the morning.”
Luna noted the hesitation with concern, but forbear to press for the reason. “I thought they needed guidance? Did something change?”
“No.” Celestia said, tiredly. “And nothing ever will change. But that’s for the best.”
“Tia... I’ve known you to be cryptic before, but at least then you seemed as if you enjoyed yourself doing so.”
Celestia continued to lay on the swirling blackness. “You were right, Lu. I should have left with you.”
After a moment’s consideration, Luna laid down beside her sister, laying a wing over her shoulder “Sister, please, I wish to help, but I cannot fight this being when it will not show itself. And why is it that it seems to be troubling you less than your student?”
“She told her, Luna.”
Celestia stiffened. Luna’s ears swiveled around almost before she even registered the voice coming from behind. Slowly, Luna turned, and saw an exact double of her sister, watching them with an unreadable expression.
“You!” she seethed, jumping to her hooves and rearing back to charge. “You would dare enter my realm to torment my sister?”
“No,” the other Celestia said quickly. “Not to torment. I’ve tried goading, insults, logic, illogic, but I’ve never tried to outright torture her. I’m far more interested in joy and pleasure than pain, though pain can be pleasurable as well.” She shot a sour look at Celestia. “Or so I’ve heard. We don’t have very much first-hoof experience with fun things, do we, Celestia?”
“Be quiet,” Celestia grumbled.
Luna let herself fall back onto all four hooves, unsure what to make of the apparition. “If you came not to torment, then why did you attack my sister?”
“I didn’t,” the other said. “She attacked me. I simply attempted to fend her off.”
Luna blinked for a moment before turning back to her sister. “Tia? Is this true?”
“No,” Celestia replied, glaring at her double. “I tried to kill her.”
“Exactly!” The other Celestia said with a huff. “After all the good I’ve tried to do her! She’s so stubborn, Luna! How do you deal with her?”
“Well, she’s actually quite accommodating most of the time, it’s just certain things—” Luna blinked, closing her mouth. “Wait. We’re not here to discuss Tia’s bullheadedness, imposter.”
“Well, you may not be here for that reason, but that’s why I came here. She shut me out of her head, used up what little magic reserves she had, and collapsed just when things were beginning to get interesting. Who knows how poor Twilight will react now?” The imposter pouted her lips, favoring Celestia with a look of disappointment. “She was just starting to realize all the embarrassing things she’d confessed right to your face, Celestia. And you had to go and spoil it.”
“I said be quiet, you fiend!” Celestia barked out. “I may not be able to kill you, but I’m fairly certain I can hurt you.”
“Yes, you can in fact shoot the messenger,” the double said bitterly. “I hope it brought you a little joy. Goodness knows you won’t allow yourself any otherwise.”
“Wait, wait, wait,” Luna interjected before her sister yelled at herself again. “What exactly have you been pestering Tia about?”
“I’ve been trying to get her to do something about her poor student, and maybe allow herself the luxury of a little physical affection for the first time in too many centuries!” At Luna’s doubtful look, she amended: “Okay, a lot of physical affection. She refuses to order the guards to her bed, she won’t even look twice at the maids, and she won’t consider escorts no matter how many times I’ve whispered that little concept to her. The only way she’ll ever break up this dry spell is to find somepony she truly loves!”
“I would never take advantage—” Celestia began to protest.
“No. No, you wouldn’t, no matter how much she adores you,” the double said, cutting her off. “I daresay you’d be struck motionless while she did all the work, the poor dear. I do think she would, if given the chance. But first she has to allow you to fall from that pedestal so she can reach you! She has you higher than the sun itself, for goodness sake.”
“Pinkie—”
“Pinkie would be ecstatic—”
Luna’s head kept darting between the two, her mouth opening to get a word in while they bickered. She finally became frustrated and cut them both off. “Quiet, both of you!” When both turned to her, she addressed her sister. “Let me get this straight. The voice you’ve been complaining of... simply wants you to take a lover?”
“Yes!” the second Celestia said, mouthing a quick ‘Thank you’ to Luna. “A mare has needs, and hers have been too long suppressed! She’s so incredibly picky about who she will accept affection from. This is a golden opportunity served to her on a silver platter and she’s rejecting it for no reason!”
“Pinkie is not no reason, you selfish—”
Luna pressed a silver-shod hoof to the side of her head, watching the two bicker back and forth. Apparently even Celestia wanted herself to act, and was so divided on the concept she was actively arguing with herself!
How much simpler would my life have been if the voice in my own head had just wanted me to get laid?
“Tia, I’m afraid I have to side with you, or her, or it...” Both of them turned to her, her sister looking scandalized, the other Celestia looking smug and triumphant.
“Lu, don’t agree with her!” Celestia replied. “She has no compassion for anypony!”
“Lying again, Celestia? I care about how you feel, how Twilight feels, and how Pinkie feels! Twilight wants you, and Pinkie wants you two to be happy! You’re the one who doesn’t care!”
This exchange set off a fresh round of bickering, and no matter what Luna said neither seemed interested in what she had to say. Luna sighed heavily. This was not a problem violence could solve, sadly. And try as she might, talking to them wasn’t helping either.
But there was, perhaps, a solution. She just needed the right ponies brought here to talk to these two. She closed her eyes, and sent two splinters of herself to seek the ponies out.
She found Twilight first, and while she expected the worst, Twilight was in a relatively happy dream. She was at an amusement park with Pinkie, eating cotton candy. She supposed a doctor of the head-sciences would find the fact that the cotton candy was rippled with color like her sister’s mane and shaped like Pinkie’s tail rather fascinating, but Luna had little time for more than mild amusement. She snatched Twilight from her dream, spiriting her back to where the original Luna waited.
Her third self found Pinkie moments later, planning a wedding reception. A stack of invitations lay on a table, with a photo of Twilight and Celestia kissing. The printing itself was gibberish, of course.
The party mare turned around, a huge smile on her face. “Luna! What’s up?”
Luna did her best to quell her surprise. Pinkie was a lucid dreamer, and seemed to unerringly notice Luna on the occasions she checked in, regardless of what was going on in her dreams at the time. Pinkie’s dreams were always varied and interesting, but to see her planning a wedding between her marefriend and Luna’s sister told Luna that this was the thing Pinkie most wanted to be doing at that moment. Quite the thing for a mare that could do anything while dreaming. “H-hello, Pinkie. I need you to come with me, please.”
“Sure!” Pinkie replied, setting down her seating chart. She climbed on Luna’s back, settling in between the wings in a way that spoke of familiarity with how to position herself.
Luna opened her mouth to protest, then gave up with a mental shrug. It would be easier than carrying the earth pony in her forelegs, at least.
Her two other selves arrived with their charges, promptly disappearing into mist that coalesced back into the original.
Luna glanced back at her sisters, and with a tap of her hoof, the Dreamscape rippled and changed, forming the most comforting image she could imagine at that moment.
The ever-changing expanse of swirling blackness was replaced by wooden floors, a comfortable couch, and a pair of armchairs surrounding a simple table. Various bird cages adorned the walls. A bookshelf appeared, filled with romance novels and books on animal care. A tea set sat on the table, and the smell of camomile wafted throughout the room. Next to the tea was a plate full of delicately-cut watercress sandwiches.
Twilight, who had been rather startled being snatched away from her dream, appeared even more so to be in the presence of two Celestias.
Pinkie was simply smiling as she took the whole scene in. She hugged Twilight excitedly. Apparently she approved of what she saw.
Luna approached her sisters, having to physically separate them as they glared at each other menacingly. When she had pried them apart, the one who was presumably her real sister got a look at who was behind her, and her eyes narrowed to small pinpicks.
“Twilight...” she whispered.
“Yes, Tia. I brought Pinkie as well.” Luna said. “Now, all of you, sit down and work this out. I’ll be here in case one of you decides to say something stupid.” With that, Luna stepped away from them both, sitting down in another chair in the far corner. “Well? What are you waiting for?”
“Okay, this time I’m sure I’m dreaming!” Twilight said with a relieved grin. Then her expression turned troubled. “Unless you’ve been to the mirror pool? Is the other one like you at all?”
“Yes, you are dreaming, Twilight.” Luna replied testily. “All three of you are, the other Celestia is an apparition that apparently represents my sister’s repressed desires, and I’m dream-walking. Are we clear, now?”
From the other side of the room, a squeal of excitement could be heard, followed by a different voice announcing indignation.
“Ooooo!” Pinkie said, poking at the second Celestia’s wings. “You look just like Celly!”
The double rolled her eyes, pulling the wing from Pinkie’s hoof. “Of course I do. Who else would I look like?”
Twilight, meanwhile, was still coming to grips with what Luna had told her. “Wait, she’s...” she pointed to the second Celestia. “And that one— What?!”
Luna looked pointedly at her sister. “You didn’t tell them anything, did you?”
“I didn’t want to sound crazy,” Celestia snapped back.
“It was good enough for me, Tia,” Luna replied, rolling her eyes.
“You’re not really crazy, Celestia,” the double interjected. “Most of the time when ponies talk about hearing voices, they aren’t actually there. I’m very much here.”
Pinkie continued poking and prodding at the other Celestia, and it eventually just stopped paying attention as it, Celestia and Luna exchanged insults and verbal barbs. All the while, Twilight just stared at it. She was dreaming, but that didn’t stop what was happening from being real. She wasn’t going to fall into that trap again. This being was very like Celestia, and according to Luna, was a representation of ‘her repressed desires’.
Was this the voice that Celestia had been talking to when Pinkie had overheard her?
“Wait... you’re her Id!” Twilight exclaimed in surprise. “Her wants and desires given physical form!”
The second Celestia looked at her with a pleased expression. “There, you see? Devastatingly intelligent, and incredibly cute as a bonus!”
“But how are you...” Twilight stopped, uncertain how to address this being. “Do you have a name? I don’t feel right calling you Celestia, and ‘it’ seems horrible.”
“I don’t have a name, but Celestia seems fond of calling me ‘Fiend’, so I suppose that works.” Fiend said, grinning mischieviously.
“Wonderful, now it has a name,” Celestia muttered.
“Why are you bothering Celestia?” Twilight asked.
“Bothering... I suppose that’s one way of putting it. I like to think of it as aggressive persuasion, but I am apparently very bad at it. She just gets upset.” Fiend stuck her tongue out at Celestia. “But I keep trying, even if she doesn’t seem to appreciate my efforts.”
“And what are you trying to persuade her to do?”
“Not a what, but a who,” Fiend replied, winking. Her expression soured as her eyes flicked to Celestia. “She’s had trouble thinking of anything else for the last few days! But she’d rather play the martyr again, because she doesn’t have the will to reach out and take what she wants. So sad.”
Twilight blushed bright crimson as she pieced together the thinly-veiled innuendo. “So, she really—”
“Yes.”
“And she wants—”
“Goodness, so much.”
“But... I thought—”
“She’d move heaven and earth for you. She’d spell out her love in a constellation for all to see. She is, in short, madly, deeply, and passionately in love with you, and it’s tearing her apart because she won’t act on it,” Fiend replied, shaking her head.
“Please, just stop!” Celestia begged.
“I can’t,” Fiend said, giving Celestia a look that seemed strangely apologetic. “If I don’t tell her, who will? You think I’m unkind to confront you with these truths, but I really do want you to be happy, Celestia.”
“If that were so, you’d stop!”
“Do you really think I’d be here if that was what you really wanted? You needed somepony to give voice to these desires, and that need was so great it lent me a will to do it for you. You needed somepony to tell you it was acceptable to want, to love, even if it might hurt somepony else.” Fiend bowed mockingly. “Here I am, Your Highness. Call me a villain if you must, but for goodness sake stop ignoring your heart!”
“Pretty words for such a despicable sentiment!” Celestia shot back, her mane going from the gentle colors of dawn to the fiery reds of sunset. “I refuse to take love, even if you think it would make me happier. These two deserve their happiness, and nothing you could say would convince me otherwise!”
“Then what will you do, Celestia? Slink off to your home, knowing you had love in your hooves and let it escape?”
“Princess, maybe it’s not very helpful to argue—” Twilight attempted to interject.
Celestia stood, marching at Fiend with rage in her eyes. “Better that than stealing it away—”
She blinked in surprise as her nose hit a purple shieldwall. Her head swiveled to Twilight. “What are you doing, Twilight?”
Twilight grinned nervously. “Um... I just wanted to keep you from trying to attack her again. She doesn’t seem to mean any harm...”
“No harm?” Celestia demanded. “Do you have any idea the things she’s suggested I do?”
“My personal favorite was your reaction to when I told you to spirit her away to your bedroom and make furious and passionate love to her until she couldn’t see straight,” Fiend said from behind the shield, tittering into a hoof. “I could feel your cheeks burning like the surface of the sun!”
Celestia’s eyes whipped back to regard Fiend. “You will hold your tongue or so help me—”
“Princess, please stop!” Twilight begged. “I… I don’t understand anything anymore, but if you really love me, please, sit down?”
Celestia continued to glare at Fiend for a moment longer, then slowly turned, sitting back down on her chair.
Twilight watched in shock, unsure what to say. “T-thank you,” she said at last, her voice a little breathless.
“Are you quite done making a fool of yourself, Tia?” Luna asked from across the room.
“Lu, that is the opposite of helpful.” Celestia replied. She turned her gaze back to Twilight, her mane returning to the more gentle hues that were the norm. “Forgive me, Twilight. My... Fiend knows very well which buttons to push to make me react.”
“Yes, to make you angry. I have no idea how to get you to do things that are less foolish.” Fiend said, a sad little frown on her face.
“Stop that,” Celestia said, warningly. “I refuse to believe you’re anything other than a pest that should be removed.”
“I don’t think she can be, Princess.” Twilight stared intently at Fiend as she thought, tapping a hoof to her chin. “The Id is a fundamental part of your subconscious, not something you can excise.”
“Am I meant to just live with her for all time, then?” Celestia demanded.
“Well, yes and no.” With a thought, Twilight summoned a book to her, then groaned in frustration as she flipped it open to find gibberish on the inside. “She said herself that her will comes from you. Part of you wants—” Twilight blushed furiously. “B-but you also don’t... because you feel like it would be wrong—”
“It is wrong.” Celestia insisted, looking away from Twilight. “What... what she said was true, so very true. But I can’t... I can’t just...”
“I… I know. I can’t either.” Twilight said, regretfully. “Pinkie is so wonderful, and I... I couldn’t bear her just stepping aside like she was trying to do.”
“Then... then we agree.” Celestia replied, her voice a mix of relief and regret. “In a way, I’m glad. You’re... you’re such a wonderful mare, Twilight. You deserve to be happy, and I’m so, so sorry for—”
“You’re giving up?” Luna demanded, standing up and dislodging Pinkie from her lap. “Just like that?”
“Well, yes.” Celestia replied, surprised. “I certainly have no ill-will, but there is nothing more to discuss!”
Luna pressed a hoof to her forehead, shaking her head sadly. “Tia, why? Why are you so insistent on making this about which of you gets to enjoy fair Twilight’s company? Pinkie was willing to step aside to make room for you. Do you really think she’d object to sharing Twilight instead?”
Pinkie, who had been silently watching the proceedings in rapt attention, asked: “Is that a thing? Can... can we do that?”
“Luna, I told you before, it’s not that simple—”
“No, Tia. It’s very, very simple.” She turned to Twilight and asked: “Do you love my sister?”
“I...” Twilight hesitated, glancing at Pinkie with fearful eyes.
“Fair enough. To you, it seems complicated as well. But you care for her, and you love Pinkie.”
“...Yes?”
“Tia, you’ve said how you feel about Twilight. What about Pinkie?”
Celestia didn’t answer for a time, unsure what to say. “Pinkie... is a very nice pony. She deserves to be happy. This isn’t fair to her.”
“I didn’t ask you if it was fair,” Luna replied.
“She doesn’t know for certain,” Fiend interjected. “She admires Pinkie, and cares for her. She even kissed her because she felt Pinkie needed a show of affection. It was adorable.”
“You... kissed Pinkie?” Twilight asked, unsure how she felt about that.
“I did,” Celestia replied. “She was in a very dark place, Twilight. I kissed her, and held her close.”
“Celly was so nice, Twi-Twi!” Pinkie exclaimed. “I lost my happy, and she helped me find it again!” While saying this, she’d been sporting a huge grin, but it faltered as she saw Twilight’s reaction. “Was... was that bad?”
“If it was, it was no fault of yours, Pinkie Pie.” Celestia said quickly. “That was my decision to make, and I stand by it.”
“You’re both so focused on what is 'wrong', that neither of you even consider for a moment what could be right!” Luna said, cutting them all off from further discussion of the kiss. She pointed at Twilight: “Twilight loves Pinkie, and cares for Celestia, quite possibly loves her.” The hoof swiveled to Celestia. “My sister adores Twilight, and cares for Pinkie. And Pinkie...” Her eyes shifted to Pinkie, who sported a large, expectant grin. “Pinkie loves Twilight, but she seems to have a deep affection for everypony she calls friend. Neither of you want to hurt her, and she would rather step aside than see the two of you unhappy. But it doesn’t have to be that way!”
“Luna, I told you... I can’t do what you do.” Celestia replied.
“Yes, Tia, you’d take no joy in simply basking in the love they share. I...” Luna hesitated. “I can see that was shallow enjoyment, now, not something that you’d appreciate. But I’m not speaking of simply joining them for an occasional tryst. I mean love them. Why separate them? At the very least, let them decide if they wish to love you, before you deny them the chance.”
A shrill whistle assaulted everypony’s ears, and all eyes turned to Pinkie. “Time out!” She called out, rushing to Twilight. “Huddle up!”
Twilight found herself forcibly placed into a two-pony huddle, face to face with Pinkie Pie. Normally, this would mean excessive kisses, but for the moment Pinkie merely excitedly kissed her on the nose since she needed her mouth for talking.
“Twilight, can we do that? Is it okay if we love Celly? I mean I know you got upset about Dashie and Applejack, but they have each other. Celly needs lots and lots of love, Twi-twi! I mean, I thought you could do that, but... is it okay if I love her, too? I don’t really wanna go, and if we could both love her that would be twice as many ponies for her! I think then she’d be happy for sure!”
“Pinkie... it’s not that simple—”
“Ya-huh!” Pinkie replied, kissing her on the nose again. “Two’s a party, but three’s a bigger party. It means twice as many kisses and snuggles! She gets you and me, you get me and her and I get...” She paused, apparently doing the math. “Well, I don’t know if she wants to kiss and snuggle me, but I’ll kiss and snuggle her so it’s okay!”
“That doesn’t sound very fair to you...” Twilight replied, trying not to be swayed too much by her heart as she tried to logically process the suggestion, since the mere idea of being able to love Celestia sent it into overdrive. It was a faulty thing, far too prone to breaking. That made it suspect to her.
So, ignoring that piece of untrustworthy machinery, she set her mind to the task. Pinkie was right, from a purely mathematical viewpoint, at least. Twice as much affection was, in theory, very beneficial. But math had failed her in matters of love before. After all, according to her studies on Celestia, they should have been compatible—
Wait.
Math hadn’t failed her! She’d just fallen victim to incomplete data! There was no way she could have known about Celestia’s martyr complex when it came to taking lovers! Of course, in retrospect she should have accounted for her relative age at the time, but she could forgive her past self for being young and foolish.
So, the theory was sound, the emotion was present, and if all parties were willing...
She looked into Pinkie’s eyes, seeing hope in them that kindled the same in her own. It could work... but she worried about the happiness quotient. Pinkie would be giving love freely, but only receiving from one pony. That was unacceptable. If anything, Pinkie needed to receive more than her output.
She wasn’t certain she could make up for a lack of affection from one party. But she had to try, because the alternative was Celestia living out their lifetimes in stoic unhappiness, plagued by her own mind. Nopony deserved that, not when they had somepony who loved them.
In the end, that decided it for her. Celestia needed love, and since Pinkie and Twilight were willing to give it, that would be wonderful. And maybe... if Celestia cared for Pinkie, maybe love could grow there as well. Perhaps then, there would be enough love for all.
Her heart clamored for attention once more, and she did her best to soothe it. She couldn’t afford to break down into an emotional mess, not yet. First, she had to convince Celestia it could work.
“What should we do, Twilight?” Pinkie asked at last. “Am... am I wrong? I really really don’t want this to be wrong, but I’m not all that great with this stuff. I like making ponies happy. I think this would make both of you happy.”
Twilight could see the worry growing in Pinkie’s eyes, the light of hope dimming. She kissed Pinkie’s nose affectionately, letting her own mouth pull up from its contemplative pursed lips to a smile. “You’re not wrong, Pinkie. Thank you.”
“Should I call time in?” Pinkie asked, glancing back at Celestia, who appeared to be waiting patiently as Twilight glanced that way as well.
That actually forced a small chuckle out of Twilight, and she kissed Pinkie on the lips gratefully. Pinkie’s eyes lit up for a moment, and she kissed back quickly, before pulling away again with a goofily happy smile. “Go ahead, Pinkie.”
“Tiiiime iiiin!” Pinkie announced, dashing back to Luna’s lap to watch.
Twilight found herself sans her Pinkie-shield, faced with her mentor/crush and the Fiend in her head. Celestia was still waiting patiently, in a manner that spoke of centuries of practice allowing other beings to give an address. Fiend was watching Twilight with rapt attention, quietly munching on a whole mountain of popcorn contained in a bucket that looked far too small to hold that volume of snackfood.
The little purple unicorn felt very small, then, as the eyes of three alicorns and one Pinkie Pie were all regarding her, waiting for her next words. And indeed, those words would decide something very important.
She nervously flicked her eyes to Pinkie Pie, and found that her marefriend had erected a banner, which, despite being written in incomprehensible squiggles, Twilight still understood to read ‘Go, Twilight! You can do it!’
It made her laugh just a little, and untightened her chest enough to take a deep breath. “Princess...” The word felt all wrong, and she allowed it to die on her lips as she tried again. “Celestia, please, don’t go? Pinkie and I... we want you to stay, and be with us. I... I know you’re a princess, and you have to run the country, but... we could be here, waiting for you, whenever you can make time.”
Celestia’s face was unreadable, and Twilight kept talking in a panic. “I know maybe it’s not what you wanted. You’re not used to the idea of multiple partners. Truthfully, I don’t know how it will work, myself. But I... I can’t let Pinkie go. That might be selfish of me, but it’s all I can do. As much as I love you... I love her too.”
“Twilight... I...”
“Don’t say no. Please. I know I don’t deserve it... But if it would make you happy at all, you deserve that and so much more. Let’s just try? I promise I won’t let it affect how much I respect you, but I hate the idea of you shutting yourself off from love. It’s horrible. I—”
Twilight quickly found herself wrapped up in white plumage, and her lips pressed firmly to Celestia’s. Her eyes opened wide in fright, then slowly fluttered closed as she kissed Celestia back. In that moment, she let the barriers around her heart fall. It wasn’t nearly as bad as she’d imagined.