Trying to comfort the wailing foal in front of her, bundled up in a raggedy, thin blanket and screeching restlessly, proved to be difficult for Dinky. She cooed comforting words into his ear, rocked him several times in vain, had even tried changing his diaper - which was utterly useless, considering there was nothing in need of being changed. The infant in front of her, his pain-stricken golden eyes reflecting hers, desperately shook in Dinky's arms and never ceased his incessant whining and wailing. Why should he, anyway? The voices screeching at each other echoing through the house unnerved even the aunts' poor kitty, Jasper, who had taken cover under the warmth of the guest bed's covers and was currently nothing more than a lump lying under the heap of blankets, tail flicking out and occasionally lashing from underneath the bedspread.
Dinky growled frustratedly at the tiny pony she was cradling. The little unicorn foal wriggled restlessly in his disturbed state. She felt compassion, sure, but a great deal of weariness flowed through her tired veins at the same time. One thing was for sure: when she grew older with time, she was never, ever going to have foals. The slightest possibility made her wrinkle her face in disgust. They were cute, and it was true, but she just couldn't see herself being able to cope with and handle the overwhelming amount of stress that came with parenting.
A typical pang of unnerving fear made her heart bolt. Dinky sat straight up, her sudden movement eliciting another long, pitiful cry out of the infant she was holding. No one in this house liked the sound of Dinky's mother and Pear Seed screaming at each other in the back of the lonely house. It had been going on for some time now, and the only cowardly thing Dinky could think to do was conceal herself in the guest room with her two younger cousins - Chirpy was, for once in her lifetime, curled up quietly in the corner of the room, fear written deep in her expression as she listened to the sound of her mother and aunt quarreling loudly in the other room down the hall. As annoying as she was, it was hard for Dinky not to feel sorry for the chubby filly as she noticed her quivering pelt and the state her facial expressions had reached.
"It's alright. Come here, Chirpy," Dinky spoke softly across the room to the shaken pegasus filly.
The suddenly stoic pony briefly hesitated, then slipped silently from her spot in the corner to make a dash for Dinky's comfort, as if her life depended on it.
Dinky threw her arm around her cousin and held Dipsy tight with the other. She could hear the upset, disturbed breathing of Chirpy's as she wailed into Dinky's embrace.
"Shh." Dinky muttered, patting her tangled mane but still straining her ears to listen and see if she could make out what her family was screaming about.
"Dinky?" Chirpy actually referred to her cousin by name, and earned herself a glance from the pony in question.
"Yeah?"
"Has Mom been drinking again?"
Dinky was so amazingly startled that she couldn't bring herself to answer at first. The younger pony pulled away from the hug to sniffle and stare at her with teary pale violet eyes.
Dinky found the willpower inside of herself to whisper a barely audible response. "...What?"
"My mom," Chirpy explained in a hoarse whisper with just as much power as Dinky's strange response. "She drinks a lot. Was she drinking earlier?"
Dinky decided to attempt to sound normal, but the shock of the moment was building in her throat. Perhaps her family had a few darker secrets then they let onto? "...What makes you say that?"
Chirpy sniffled, wiping a straying tear away from her flushed pink face. "She gets really mad when she drinks a lot of wine. She doesn't do it often, but... when she does, it's really scary."
The pegasus filly whined as shouting from the other room ensued, and retreated back into Dinky's small fortress of comfort, gazing down softly at her wailing little mess of a brother.
"He's scared," she whispered, stroking the back of his growing, short blonde mane lovingly and caressing his face with her warm hoof, causing him to settle down and stop his excessive crying a bit. "It's okay," Chirpy cooed to the child as he whimpered with an upset temper.
Dinky looked on in amazement as Dipsy's older sister calmed him slowly, carefully, as if she had known what to do all along. Soon enough the infant had nodded off and the slow, steady rising and falling of his chest told them he was fast asleep.
It was like Chirpy was the only one in the world who could speak to him.
As if she had read Dinky's mind, the pegasus whispered to her in a hushed, fond tone: "This past winter when my dad left us, my mom would shut herself in her room. She rarely spoke to me or anyone. All she did was drink and on some hard nights she would come from her room to yell at us. Dipsy would cry when she did this, so after she left I would have to be the one to comfort him. I found that if you just approach him calmly and stroke his mane he'll fall right asleep."
A pang of guilt arose in Dinky's chest as she realized Chirpy's awful history and the fact that Chirpy was possibly the exact opposite of the little filly she thought she was. She was just so mature for her age, so cautious and loving, sweet and careful...
And it pained her to hear of the young child's past. And here I thought my life was bad, Dinky thought to herself as she snapped at herself mentally for thinking Chirpy was stupid earlier.
"She doesn't do it anymore," Chirpy said quickly, as if she knew exactly what Dinky was thinking. "Not usually. I just thought that maybe..."
Her voice was lost in the shouting of the two sisters outside. Loud, thumping footsteps approached the hall leading to their door.
The minute the door was thrown open, Dipsy started wailing. In shock, Dinky's head darted up to notice the sight of her furious mother standing in the doorway, red face damp with a river of never ending tears.
Chirpy clung to her waist, hooves trembling, but her mother snarled, and Dinky gasped in deep shock.
She didn't think she had ever seen her mother this amazingly angry.
"Come on, Dinky. Say goodbye to your cousins. We're leaving."
Heartache swelled through Dinky's character. "Now?"
"Yes!" her mother screamed, causing Chirpy to slink off of her cousin's grip and dash to the corner where she had been earlier, cowering in fear like a cornered coyote.
The unicorn carefully returned Dipsy to the trembling child, opening her mouth to say her goodbyes, but before she could her mother cut her off in a screeching rage.
"Hurry up! We're leaving this awful town full of awful ponies!"
She glared at her mother. What had even gotten into that pony? She received an equally icy stare that pulled at her heartstrings. But she knew she couldn't just leave the poor children there...
She shook herself. No, her aunts would watch over them, should their mother get... irritable. This thought didn't completely cleanse her worries, but it did help soften the haze of confusion she was in as her mother repeatedly screamed at her to hurry up.
"Take care of yourself, Chirpy," she whispered, grasping the side of the poor child's tear-stained face. "Don't let anyone-"
"If you don't get over here right now I'm taking off! I'm serious!" her mother snarled, face as red as a strawberry.
She didn't have any time to deeply think about her mother's out-of-character attitude. She figured she would interrogate her later. Still, her heart ached at the sight of Chirpy's tears running down her face as she clutched tightly her small, weak, helpless brother being cut short by the door slamming over and leaving them in the room alone.
"Mom!" Dinky hissed as they stormed down the hall. She could hear her aunt Pear Seed's distinct voice rambling on.
"Get out of here, you idiotic freak! I hope I never see your hideous face or your disturbing set of eyes again!" She then proceeded to call Dinky's mother some names that made the confused unicorn's mouth fall open in shock - before her mother slammed the door, shutting the furious pony out of sight.
Amethyst Star had sealed herself in their car, weeping to herself whilst listening to the faint screeches of fury and hatred shared between two sisters. When she noticed the extremely strange sight of her mother, outraged and in tears, she barely had time to mutter a word before they were off on the road again; all three of them sitting in silence as they pulled up in the motel parking lot to retrieve their belongings and check out.
Dinky's stomach churned at everything - every single memory her weekend had given her this far. Their mother sat in the front seat, head buried in her hooves, sobbing softly to herself.
Neither of her daughters had any idea what the heck had happened, but it must have been huge to make their mother snap like this. Usually she was just so cheery, laid-back, easygoing... downright happy-go-lucky. She had never, ever seen her so amazingly distraught and broken as she was now... she couldn't explain it, but it made her want to cry to see her own mother break down like this. It was so extraordinarily unusual that it was beginning to bring back some of Dinky's old depressed and startled emotions she tried her best to keep locked away in the back of her mind.
Her hoof instinctively reached up to cuff the golden locket that hung around her neck, sighing softly as she pulled it against her heart for comfort. She wondered what her dad would do if he were here. In all his troubles, was he brave? Selfless? Compassionate?
She had no idea, but she could only try to be the pony everyone remembered him to be.
"I'm sorry," their mother spoke after a long, continuing and awkward silence. Her voice was strained and hoarse, and Dinky could tell she was still shedding tears. "That was so unlike me.... I shouldn't have gotten mad like that in front of you. I'm really sorry."
Dinky said nothing. She couldn't even begin to think of what to say, but she did lay a hoof on her mother's shoulder encouragingly to show her support. The pegasus acknowledged her gesture by leaning back towards her to reveal her red face, bloodshot eyes flowing with tears that streaked her chin and neck.
"What happened?" Amethyst spoke quietly, though her attention remained loyal to the road ahead of her as she continued to steer the car through the bumpy streets of Fillydelphia.
Their mother sniffled, wiping away a couple of tears, and shook her head in distress.
"You... you two aren't ashamed of how my eyes look?" she whispered softly, pain punctuating every syllable as she spoke.
A short silence filled the air before Dinky spoke up. "No! Of course not!"
Amethyst glanced back at her mother quickly before focusing back on driving, and she muttered with careful affection: "Why would you..."
"Isn't it obvious?" the pegasus shrieked, causing Dinky to give a small jolt at the sudden change in her mother's voice. "Pear Seed says I'm a disgrace to the family tree. That I shouldn't live or come around to bother them. She thinks I'm a horrible mother because I can't seem to control my own eyes for Celestia's sake! And you know what?" She sniffed. "You know what? She's right. I suck. All I do is mess things up! I messed up our family, I messed up my relationships with my sisters, I messed up your relationships with your aunts, heck, Equestria won't even let me drive anymore because I'm. So. Atrociously. Clumsy!"
A long and awkward silence loomed over the head of the dreary old car they drove as it rumbled down the narrow streets. Every so often their mother would sniff loudly or wail for a short second and wipe her eyes.
Finally Dinky spoke.
"That isn't true," she said weakly, not having enough energy to sound amazingly compassionate at the moment. "They're wrong."
Her mother breathed deeply. "I thought that... that if I showed her my personality, she'd change how she felt about me. I... I was wrong." She covered her face in her hooves. "I'm nothing but a big failure."
Amethyst heaved a big sigh. "You're not a failure. Y'know what? Screw Aunt Pear Seed. She never really liked us anyway."
But their mother only shook her head. "No. There was a time when she wasn't like this. She and I used to be so close growing up as fillies. She loved me regardless of my strange eye condition. Stood up to bullies for me. Told me that my eyes made me special and unique."
Dinky stared blankly in disbelief.
She continued. "Then one day, a new colt moved into our neighborhood. Your future father, my future husband, Ponet, was soon enough involved in an absurd love triangle between Pear Seed and I. He chose me, because he loved me, and my eyes stood out to him, but in a good way. He loved that I was unique.
"Pear Seed grew angry towards me and him. I think it was quite obvious she was so heartbroken, but she didn't say anything. She stopped talking to me and more or less ignored everyone. I don't know if it was because we never split up, but she never really did get over that stallion. She didn't even show up to our wedding."
The two sisters didn't say anything for a minute, but Amethyst broke the silence after clearing her throat. "I'm sorry. That's awful."
"Thank you."
Dinky sniffled at the horrible story, never even knowing this had happened. She guessed that love could turn a pony from cheerful to bitter in the blink of an eye. Her heart ached as she remembered how that feeling felt with Pipsqueak.
"...Mom?" she spoke hoarsely, voice crackling under emotion.
"Yes, my muffin?" She noticed her mother had calmed considerably, presumably from letting her stress leak out.
"Do you ever miss Dad?"
She hesitated, swallowing and deepening her frown. "Yes. I miss him with all my heart," she choked, pain surrounding every detail of her voice, "because I loved him. I think about him every day, and I wish and hope with every last fiber of my being that he'll somehow come back to me, to you two. And I know it's crazy. But I know that if he were here, he would have wanted me to be strong. And I have to be strong, for my precious daughters."
Dinky's hooves found the golden locket captured around her neck, teasing over the handle that would open to reveal the picture of her parents at her age. In all honesty, this was meant to soothe her, but all that happened ended up in her sobbing till her mother leaned over to plant a soft kiss on her forehead. She looked up, finally, to see a pair of uneven golden eyes trying to reach her.
"Hush, sweet muffin. Your father loves you. He wants you to be strong, too."
"I'm... not as strong as you.."
"Don't say that, muffin. I wish I were as strong as you."
She caressed her daughter's face lovingly, hoof stroking the sides of her damp face. This was the side of her mother she knew. Her real personality was beautiful, and anyone who thought otherwise was suffering of utter stupidity. Dinky wanted to tell her mother just that, but couldn't muster up the strength at the moment.
Of course Amethyst then had to ruin the moment by pretend-gagging. "Oh dear Celestia, you two aren't going to have a special mother-daughter moment, are you? Because if you are, let me know so I can pull over to throw up."
"Shut up," Dinky purred, a smile creeping up her face at last.
She was going to be brave, because she could try to begin to relate to her mother's devastation due to losing a loved one.
"Dinky?! Help me!"
Her eyes, the size of marbles, frantically skimmed the surface of the ocean water in a desperate attempt to locate the pony behind the shrill calls for help. His pained voice was enough to torture her and drive her into madness.
"RUMBLE! Can you hear me? Rumble!" she screamed to the sky and the thick black clouds above her. Her neck twisting around every second to get another inch of water to cover with her vision, she panicked and screeched his name over and over in hopes that he could somehow hear her.
"Dinky!" the voice spat, sounding as if he was struggling to keep salty water out of his mouth. She could hear the flailing of his hooves and his efforts to scream for help, but couldn't locate him somehow. It felt like he was invisible.
There was only one thing to do.
"Hang on Rumble! I'm coming!" she shrieked, voice shaky and weak.
The unicorn braced herself as she dove headfirst into the rapid attack of waves. The sudden shocking sensation of icy water surrounding her and getting through her pelt made her jolt slightly, and the minute she opened her eyes an intolerable amount of salt stung them rapidly. Growling and spitting, she too strived to keep her head above the water as she paddled with her front legs vigorously to keep herself afloat. "Rumble! Rumble! Where are you?!"
Never before had she been so devastated by hearing an absolute ominous silence.
Taking a deep breath, she plunged back under the waves, ignoring the pain of salt in her eyes as she whipped her head around, trying to scan through the dirty black mess of water she found herself in. Panicking, Dinky felt her lungs drain of air, so naturally she returned to the surface to scream his name some more. There was no reply. There was nothing.
"No! NO!" she wailed, heart beating out of her chest. She didn't know how much more of this she could take. She needed to find him.
A horrid feeling made her stomach ache. She couldn't stand not hearing or seeing any sight of him. Her heart was on edge as she racked her brain to think of where he could possibly be, hoping that somehow he would just suddenly appear.
But he didn't, and she quickly slipped back under the water, screaming his name through the thick water that heavily muffled her voice. She could hardly even distinctly hear her own screams through her panicking haze of emotion, and once again bolted back up for another deep breath before diving back underwater.
This can't be happening.
She would die if he drowned. She needed to find him - she just couldn't take life without her precious best friend. Spitting out salty water and bursting into tears after emerging without a sign of Rumble, the pony didn't even care about how her nose, mouth and eyes all stung at once. He had drowned and it was all her fault.
"No. No, no, no, no, no! Rumble!" Dinky didn't even try to raise her voice anymore. It was too painful of a moment to do anything, and she just sat there in the cold dark water, sniffling and crying in defeat.
How could she even begin to process what was happening at the moment?
A rough voice barely managed to catch her ear. "Dinky!"
She didn't care who it was anymore. She wasn't stupid; she wasn't going to pretend that voice belonged to Rumble, no matter how much she wanted it to be, because it didn't. Its distinct feminine properties only further disappointed her as she wished with valid discontent for him to somehow show up in some place. There was only one pony that could even begin to make her feel better at the moment, and he was imprisoned under the deep black pools of ocean water.
"Dinky!"
Her terrified yellow eyes shot open to examine her surroundings. She was in the car, which was parked, and from one glance out the window when she shuffled to regain her balance she could tell it was nighttime.
"Where are we?"
"Home, idiot," Amethyst's gruff voice snapped, the sound of the car door slamming left to ring in Dinky's mind as she tried to collect herself.
When she was all snuggled in bed, her things unpacked and stored in their rightful places, before she could yet again ponder over life and her strange feelings, she let out a deep sigh.
She didn't even begin to try to understand how amazing it felt to be back home.
Sure, her house was old, rickety, creaky, and dusty. But it was still home, and she wouldn't ever want to be anywhere else.
Her comforting thoughts were interrupted by a familiar buzzing sound. The pony's head whipped around to find her phone lit up by a certain text from a certain friend. She gulped.
Deciding to face her fears, her heart pace doubled as she checked all her recent texts. There were tons of them. All sent by the one pony she was having troubles with feelings over, the texts spaced out by a couple of hours.
Hi Dinky.
~
It's Rumble.
~
I'm really sorry about what happened last week.
~
Please forgive me.
~
Dinky?
~
I miss you really badly and I just want to see your face again.
~
Please answer me.
~
Hi. It's me again. Sorry to bother you. I just wanted to know how you were doing
~
I'm really sorry, even if we can't be more than friends I still want us to be friends
~
What I did was wrong and I get it, okay? Please just answer me, you don't even have to forgive me, just talk to me, please
~
Dinky?
~
Sorry. I'll stop bothering you
~
Pale moonlight flittered through the shutters protecting Rumble's window. It fell gingerly on his long blue bedspread, a silky shine reaching up to the shoulders of the depressed gray pegasus. His tired pale purple eyes traced the soft lining of the blankets over his bed, thinking of nothing but the pony he had let down. Himself.
He couldn't believe he had let himself get this way - saddened, angered, not motivated by anything. And over what? A girl.
But it was a girl he loved to the moon and stars and back - he would break dimensions for her, and the worst part was she most likely didn't even know how much she meant to him. It was such a waste. Months of pining for her, wanting her so desperately, had been shattered in one stupid move. If he could turn back time, he would. He might even make sure he never met this amazing mess of a pony whom he adored greatly.
He screwed up. He didn't know why, though. Every single feeling from the moment he first captured her beautiful glowing face in the sunlight to the kiss they had shared on the stone bridge over the rapids had been deeply valid, meaning everything to him but not the same to her. He selfishly wished she would love him.
Suddenly, a sharp, painful twist of a ring provoked his senses, and he turned his head stiffly to glare at his phone which had been alerted due to an incoming text.
It was from the unicorn mare whom he adored.
"Hey."