When last we lef hour horse, everything looked dire! Bugqueen Chrysalis used dirty tricks to defeat all the princesses cuz she’s a Queen and that’s higher than Princess(even when there is for princesses, duh.)
High above Canterlot Lesbian City in the ivory tower Twilestia once called home, Twilight Sparkle writhed and called for help!
“Help!” Twilight cryed hard but no one came. Quuen chrysalios laughed and turned around, knocking over a vase with her non-standard marestallion parts. “No one will help you!”
Cyrsalis walked toward the bed(Twilight was tied to it) and knocked over a lamp. “It’s hard to walk with this thing.”
“What are you goin todo?” Twilight tried to look out the window but she was mindcontroled into looking at it cuz of the poison in her food(see last chapter beflore the last chpt, ok??)
“I am going to rule this city and all the mares will flock to my thingie!”
“That’s evil!” Twilight tried to get away but the bed sheets where tide to her legs. She teleported by Chrysalis stopped her by slapping her horn. “Ew!!! It touched me!”
Twilight sparkle passed out.
Meanwhile in the secret dungeons of Lesbian City Canterlot, the other prinecessss were in a cell!
“We must escape.” Said Cadance. “I can’t stay in prisom, My face is too pretty for it.”
Luna nodded. “Cadance is right. We must.” “W e can use magic!”
“Oh no ya didn’t!” Applejacks stood up in the hallway still dressed like a maid and lifted her shirt to show the ropes.
Luna fell down. “Hhhhhnnnggggggggg……..my heart!”
“We will nere escape.” Cadance moped and wa s sad.
“Yes we will!” Yelled Celestai quiely from the next cell.
“How? Do we pplan?”
“Yes, I have a plan.” Celestia smilled through her bars. “W will overcome our weakness spots.”
Meanwhile, meanwhile back up in the tower, Twilight woke up alone. She sighed and tried to pull free btu she was too weak! She tried again but she was even more tried.
Suddenly Twilight heard the door open. She looked up and it was……Pinkie!
“Hiya, Twi!” Pinkie Pie waved from the doorway and then bounced into the room. “I brought you a snack!”
“Get back!.....traitor!!” Twilight struggled.
Pinkie paused at the foot of the bed and blinked in confusion. “What, why? Also, how are you talking like that? I swear you said a short sentence and then paused for effect and called me a traitor – while in the same sentence you ended before the pause! I’m impressed with the sheer incorrect audacity of it!”
Pinkie grinned and came around the edge of the bed and held up a platter of pink frosted éclairs. “Behold! My latest culinary masterpiece, Pinkie Pie’s Long Pink Pastry!” She tilted the platter to give Twilight a better look. “It’s specially made with the finest sugary-sweet ingredients Canterlot has to offer as well as my own blend of herbal supplements for energy, alertfulness and joint health!”
“You poisoned it.” Twilight groaned reaaly loud. “You betrayed lesbians ponies eveywhered”
“Wow, you misspelled two easy words there, Twilight.” Pinkie set the platter of éclairs on the bedside table. “Maybe you’re like really sick or something?”
She put a hoof lightly against Twilight’s forehead. “You don’t seem like you’re feverish. Have you eaten anything weird recently?”
Twilight tried tomoove way from Pinkie but she was tired. “Only ate what you fixed. QUEeen Chrsyalis told us you poisoned it for her. We…..were beaten and she waved her weird dude bits in my face and I couldn’t stap lookin cuz you!!!!”
“Sheesh, Twi, calm down. There isn’t any reason to use that many exclamation points.” Pinkie Pie smiled warmly and reached for Twilight’s arm and started to undo the knot. “I never poisoned your food. I TOLD Chrysalis that I did, but really, I was baking it into the rations for her minions.”
Pinkie giggled and tugged loose the sheets that held Twilight.
Twilight pulled her hoof close and lookd at Pnkie Pie. “B but,…I couldn’t stop looking at her thingie.”
“You have to admit, Twi, that it’s rather impressive.”
“See! You arew a traitor to lesbians! Twilight pointed at Pinkie as she freed her other hoofs.
Pinkie rolled her eyes. “Twilight, we’ve been over this. I’m bi. That does not mean I am a traitor to the cause of Lesbianism. I just think it’s hilarious that I cooked all those phallic foods for you guys and you still ate them! I mean, c’mon! That joke was so obvious; you should have seen it from a mile away!”
“Well I didn’t!”
Mean whilw, meanwhile, meanwhile, back in the dungeons the Princess whispered plans and the evil! Maid Applejacks and Mailflutterbat stood guard. But where was the bug queen? Was was her plan for the horseheros?
In the darkest of the dungoens,a cell help Princess Celestia! the ruler of Canterlot City Lesbians. It was really clean but smelled bad(like dust, ok??)! Thatwas bcuz Celestia was the first prisoner!
Next to the cell was cell number 2. Luna was in that one and Cadance was in cell 3.
The cells were guarded by Applejack and flufferbat! They were dressed as sexxy(2 x cuz really sexxy) maids. They were the princessesese weaknesseseses.
"Ok." Celestia whispered loudly bcuz so the other princesses could hear but she hoped AJ and Futtershy didn't.(they didn't) "Luna and Cadance wil combine and take out Apples Jack. I will get the cute one."
"You always get the cute one."
"That is because I am boss Princess." Celestia smilled and laghed. "We smash the doors on 3." Celestia counted to 3 silintkly and smashed the door to her cells!
AJ was surprised.
Luna and Cadance snashed their doors two and merged real fast into Ludance(or Caduna? Canned Tuna? lol) and jumped on Applejack before she coupr rope! Ludance kicked real harder and bucked Aj into the next dungeon, but she got up and ripped off her maid outfit. Ludance pounced!
Mean while, Celestiajumped on Fluttershy and they fought real hard! Butis sexy fighting ok.
There was a explosition
Lunadance fel to the foor as the castle shaked. “What was that?”
Aj was surprised again. “Ah don’t know.” She then then fell down cuz her hooves were tired up in her rope. She queeld in a cute way and Lunadance collapsed!
“I can’t take it! It’s too much!” Luna and Cadance started to break up, like they hadone body and too heds. It was gross. Cadance looked at Luna and smilled. “If we make it out of this u can tired me up, ok??”
“Ok.!”
Then theu merged all the way agaiojn.
Lundence jumped up and alicorned AJ in the face! Aj apled! Alicorn beats Apple so Lundance won.(don’’t hate cuz u kno rhtats how it would go ok)
Suddenly. Flutterlestia burst throw the wall. It was made of brinks! Lunadance raised an eyebrow at the yllow batwing rainbow alicorn in socks. “Now We know why you took the cute one.
Fludderestia blushed. “Yeah……….”
Elseplace on the Canterlot City Castle Lesbian……
Pinkie Pie glanced around the corner, checking for Queen Chrysalis or any of her minions. Finding the hallway clear, she helped Twilight limp weakly along. “C’mon Twi, we’re almost to the infirmary. I’m pretty sure you aren’t poisoned any more than an upset tummy. I should have checked on the expiration date on those berries a bit closer. I’m super sorry.”
Twilight grooned. “It ok Pikny. When I m not sick, I cn merge with Ceelstia agin anf we’ll defeat BugQueen Chyrsalis.”
Pinkie Pie shook her head slowly. “Wow. I mean…wow, Twilight. I still don’t know how you’re managing to talk like that. It’s weird, and that’s coming from ME.”
Twiliht shrugged and coughed agan and stumbled and fell in a wall. She triedst o get up when a pair of minions came around the corner!!
Hey! Stop you tow!” The changelinbs ran up and pointed at Twi. “Where r u going? The Queen wants you ready for doing nauty stuffs.”
“In the bedroom.” Sid the other Minion.
“Fellas…er, or ladies, whichever,” Pinkie waved her hoof dismissively, “I’m taking her to the infirmary. The Queen is going to want her in peak shape for… what did you say? ‘nauty stuffs?’” Pinkie wrinkled her nose as she mimicked the minion guard as if the words felt odd in her mouth.
Oh. Ok. The guard waved and then they walked away until they were gone.
Pinkie Pie blinked as they rounded the corner again and lifted Twilight back onto her hooves. “Ok, Fuzzy is CLEARLY off his meds. This has got to be the worst thing he’s ever written.”
“Who? Twilight asked.
“Never mind, forget I said anything, Twilight. Let’s get you fixed up.”
Eleseswhere in the Lesbian Castle of Canterlots…..,
“Hauhahah!” Chrysalis evil laughed as she opened a big imporatant looking door. It lead to a room full of pink glowy stuff.
“And now the Heart of all Lesbians Power is MINE!”
Oh snap!