Iron ma- sorry Jacob's POV Present time:
In a small clearing in the Everfree Forest, a small glowing, blue, misty portal opened up and spat out a hungover and cursing man covered in red and yellow armor. That was me. "Jarvis, remind me to get coffee the next time I introduce very hard cider to ponies. Also, tell me how much power is left in the armor?" All of the lights around me were just giving me a headache.
'Sir, the armor's power is at six percent, I don't recommend flying due to this and your history with flying and hangovers.'
"I crash into a bakery one time!" I yelled and then fell backwards because of a loud fucking bird, which I later found out to be a mocking jay. I feel as thought that is a reference to an overrated book series.
'Sir, I think you need help with moving.' Jarvis said in a slightly worried tone.
"Well, it's not like I can call up a friend and have him/her take me to the lab." As soon as I said this, a spider cellphone hit my head. I saw on it that one message was recorded, and I hit the play button. I then muttered, "Murphy, I just don't get you. Sometimes you help, but most of the time you hurt."
The recorded message came out of the phone in a generic tone. "...Hi listener, I'm Jeffery the Spider man. If you need: a friend, some help in a fight, just someone to talk to, hell, a person to relate to, dial 1 and I might pick up...ok where is off button on this...ah there."
"I do need help." I said as I pressed the one button.
I then said, in a calm yet agitated voice, "Hi, my name is Jacob, but you may know me as Iron Man. I figured that one hero could help out another with a particular problem." I felt completely ridiculous saying these lines, but I do need some help getting home. I hoped that it wasn't destroyed or looted. That would suck.
Suddenly, a red portal opens up and a certain web head pops out. He then looks around and says, "I know that this sounds like a stupid question but, are you Iron Man?" I gave a weak nod. He then proceeded to do the last thing that I would expect Spider man to do. He loudly squeed like a fanboy. It was one of the most irritating sounds that I could think of and it just caused me to hold my painful and hungover head.
He then said, "Well Tony, what do you want?" I groaned and said three things.
"First, I want you to get me some coffee, preferably dark so I can fight this hangover. Next I need help getting to my mountain lab on that mountain over there. Finally, I need help rebuilding this lab. If you do this, I'll give you three things." I then remembered what he called me. I opened up my face plate and said, "I am not Tony Stark. My name is Jacob."
In hindsight, I probably could have made that sound less bitter.
Spider man said, "Ok Iron Drunk I'll help you home. My I also ask something? Did you get that armor from the merchant from a con or did you get it from Stark in the Marvel universe? I want to know if my theroy is right that the merchant has done this to other... wait, let's get you fully sober. I know a little trick. You just need to use a singel shot of the alcohol that you got drunk off of and your hangover will be gone."
After muttering a series of cursing that would make a sailor blush, I said, "Unless you can find very hard cider, I can't do shit. Wait a moment, that fucking merchant got you as well. All I did was go to a con dressed as Iron Man and bought a helmet. Then I get dragged through a portal by the face and woke up here with a robo-butler in my head. Speaking of which, I'm going to see if I can put Jarvis at the same frequency as your spider scene." After a series of commands and figuring out that damn frequency I said, " Jarvis, why don't you say hello?"
"Hello Spider Man."said Jarvis in his usual polite monotone voice. Spider man then seemed to have a shocked expression on his face. At least, I think so. He did have a mask. "Iron man's current blood alcohol level is point zero four. Because of this information, I can conclude that he isn't drunk."
"Thank you, Jarvis." I said in a grateful tone.
"Your welcome, Sir. Alert, it appears that Spider man is lost in thought."
I took a quick look at Spider man to see that he was indeed, daydreaming. His head turned sideways, his relaxed postures, his lack of sound, it was odvious. I then shook Spidey awake and asked him, "What we're you dreaming about?"
Spider man said, "Um, about a few ideas that I could get done with some help. Also, keep Jarvis off my spider sense frequency." Sighing Spider man then shudders since he is still getting over what JARVIS did. He then asked, "When are we going to your place Jacob?"
I stood up and rubbed my head. "As soon as I get over this hangover."
Spider man nods and stands up, "Ok, mind if I ask if we are the only ones that have been displaced from our repective realities?"
"No, there are more of us." I stated as I pulled out the gengi gloves and the ice cube. I shook the gloves. "It appears that these once belonged to Gilgamesh from Final Fantasy IV. I haven't met him yet, but I knew he existed and that this was his calling card." I picked up the Ice cube. "This one used to belong to Jack Frost, someone who I have met and considered a friend. In fact, the reason that I am hungover is because I introduced hard cider to the ponies of his world. This happened after fighting a fucking huge crystal dragon." I let out a small chuckle, "A lot of ponies are probably in the same boat as me." My head soon started to clear up as I rose to stand. "Speaking of calling cards, I'll give you mine soon."
"Good to know, thanks." said Spider man. Then he said, "Also just for a heads up, I'm in the non-symboite black suit. Your also looking a lot more sober"
I looked around myself and saw that my head didn't hurt. "Huh, I guess that laughter is the best medicine." I then turned towards Spider man and said, "I only have five percent power left and I need to get to the top of that mountain." As I was saying this, I pointed towards a large mountain that is filled with traps. "Normally, I would just fly up and avoid the traps, but with my low power, I'm going to need help getting past my booby traps. Don't worry, I'll help out as well." I continued to walk the path untill I turned around and said, "Are you coming?
After a few minutes of silent walking, Spider man and I have arrived at the foot of the mountain. What hardly anyone knows is that this mountain contains a series of study caves with a rich supply of steel, silver, and other valuable metals. This was probably once an abandoned storage facility before I came along. After that, it became my base of operations. I tricked it out with alarms, traps, cameras, robots, and a giant blue orphaned Ursa Minor who is named Bubbles. Now we have to get through it. Oh joy!
"Good thing my spider sense works, or we might be dead later. Also, think you could be of assistance by helping me out after this tin man?" said Spider man in a joking tone, which was more likely to lighten the tense atmposhper. You can't blame him, since the odds of someone getting hurt is rather high. Spider man starts moving forward with confidence. Most likely, he is acting on his reasoning that the damn spider sense will help him evade the traps for anything that might hurt him.
I catch up to Spider man after a few minutes. In that time, we arrived at the mountain. It had three levels and alot of rock face to climb in between the levels. Spider man said, "Perhaps I can climb up, while you can use one of my webs as a rope." I agreed to this, and we started to climb. After a few minutes, we reached the first level. It was a large cliff that was infested with large robot beatles. These beatles were the size of dinner plates with buzz saws on it's mandables. The bugs crawled out of any hole or crevice that was near the cliff. The fact that they could crawl on walls prevented us from ignoring them. We hopped on to the cliff and battled the bugs. Spider man was fireing balls of webbing while I was shooting the small minigun on my right arm. We took out most of them and sealed the remaining ones in one of the holes. Afterwards, we resumed climbing to the next level.
We kept climbing for a good ten minutes before we walked into a tunnel. This was a large and roomy tunnel that contained a series of tiles on the floor that were placed in a five by five grid. Alongside the wall, there were unlit torches. I fired a repulsar beam at the torches, which lit them and allowed us to see a riddle carved on the wall.
I am a thing that can brighten anyone's day, yet I am not on fire,
I am a single thing that can be spread to many, yet I am not a disease,
I can be made with little to no effort, yet sometimes, only the strongest can make me while afraid. What am I?
After thinking for a while, we both said, "I got it!" I hopped on the S square, then Spider man hopped onto the M square. I leapt towards the I square, then he swung to the L square. We both landed on the E square, which caused the stone doorway to move out of the way. We walked out and found ourselves at the top of the mountain.
"I thought the iron man armor ran on mini arc reactor that has unlimited power? Also, when Stark had, in the comic, removed the sharpnel in his chest as well as make the suit solar powered, much like Superman? Wait, is this some Dues ex machina crap where we get to know each other through an adimitedly tough situation?" said Spider man. The black suit clad hero then web slings through the tunnel to help speed up the scouting.
I carefully thought out what to say. "I know that, but I have been in stone for quite some time. While I was in stone, the arc reactor failed, thus resulting in the usage of my emergency power. I need to get to a charger, so I can repair this one." After explaining myself, I saw that Spider man was gone. I mouthed a few choice words at him while holding up both middle fingers. I walked down the hallway to find a large network of elevator like tunnels leading to different rooms. I only needed to go to two rooms right now. The first room was my lab, and the second one was the main power core. I jumped down the second tunnel to find a gigantic reactor core seemed to pulse with potential energy. I walked over to the control panel and typed in the master password, Define-normal, and flipped the power on. The entire thing released a huge surge of power that activated everything. I walked back to the elevator, and went to the lab. When I got there, I saw two long supercomputers with plenty of tables pulled high with unfinished protects. I also found a spare arc reactor. I deactivated the armor to reveal my true form. I had on loose pajama pants and a white T-shirt. Not the most stylish outfit, but fuck fashion. I sat in a chair as I called for Spider man. While he was coming, I took out the broken arc reactor. He came in a few minutes later. I told him to reach into my chest and pull out a small, copper, shard. He seemed to be too afraid of hurting me to do it. I said in a calm tone, "Spider man, I just went into cardiac arrest. I need you to get this shard out of the way, so I can get this arc reactor into me." He was sweating bullets as he carefully pulled it out. As soon as that was done, I picked up the arc reactor and jammed it into me. I felt as though I was being electrocuted, but in a good way. I hopped off the chair and ran to a lab table. I then said, "How would you like a web upgrade?"
"I can do that one my self, but I would like to ask if it isn't too much trouble...wait I must know have you read in the coimics the civil war arc?" Asked Spider man as he looks at all the shiny tech most likely wanting to tinker with it. Though I'm not sure if he knows what they are and what they are ment to do.
"No, I have not." I say with a worried expression. I could never find the comics. I was more of an animation guy.
"Well, the reason I asked was because i was just woundering if we could work together in makeing me a iron spider suit. The reason is since, I'm back in my world time line i will need a back up costume that can help me fight more powerful foes that by myself, I can't handle. Another reason is that iron spider is my third favorite spider suit bar the origanl red and blue. In this list of best costumes of Spiderman." said Spiderman
"Okay, I do need you to get me some parts. First, I need you to go get me as much steel as you can from the storage facilities that go through that tunnel." I said while pointing at a certain tunnel. Next, I need you to grab the red chip, the black chip, and the large, green chip on the table closest to me. I also need your choice for weapons. Stun punches or electric webs, mini missiles or nano spy-bots, laser grenades or repulsar beams, Jet boots or a web parachute, JARVIS or Alpha Red, folding into a backpack, or not? I could also give you a spider cycle. Final question, would you like the Iron Spider suit in black, or classic colors?"
""I'll anwser those now, lector webs, nano spybots, repulsar beams, Jet boots, whose alpha red?, sure to fold into back pack, and sure, red and gold." Said Spiderman going off to get the stuff that was instructed to get.
"Alpha Red is actually a play on words. I named him after Alfred from Batman." I said as he left. I cleared off a table and took some parts from it and the other tables. While Spider man is busy with getting the Iron Spider supplies, I would build the Spider cycle. After thirty minutes of building, setting, programing, and designing, not in that order, I had the cycle completed. All that the Spider needs is a little extreme Drivers ed.
Spider man latter returned with a gigantic pile of steel. I was actually amazed at his incredible strength. I then said, "As thanks for helping me with the mountain, I give you this!" I said in an over dramatic pose.
Spidy chuckles and said, "Nice a motor cycle one question though does it run on solar power since my equestria is about as primitive as the tv shows." The he sets down the pile of steel and metal with a thud.
We then went over a pretty heated discussion over different alloys that whould react differently to different metals. During this, I designed and constructed an armor right under his nose. After a couple hours, we came to an agreement that Nth metal mixed with vibranium could cancel out a magic based attack. I made the back appendages out of that.
"It should be able to hook up to the arc reactor in the token that I gave you." I saw Spiderman visibly relax as I tossed him the armor, in back pack mode, that I had been working on while I was talking to him. He looked surprised as he picked up the armor. It was nice until Spiderman had to leave to test this out.
I didn't ask him to stay. I just said, "Be sure to give me the test results and whatever else you think will peak my interest." He gave me a salute and disappeared when I said, "Jeffery, our contract is complete." I now sat back in my lab, alone to my thoughts.
(Me Spiderman)
As I return in my world with my bike and armor indo feel bad though that I did lie to Jacob about not knowing other displaced, but i kinda wasnt thinking and Hybrid was silent strangly. Once i can sii in my reality ulp since now Celestia is here and looking ready to fight, me well if she wants to go another round with me so be it I will fight since I now have Hybrid and the iron spider suit. I get into fightning stance really hoping I don't need to call in help from others.