Post-mediated Trauma
Ash jolted awake with a hand clutching his chest. His breathing was labored and sweat dampened his brow. With the back of his other hand, Ash wiped his forehead.
The Human closed his eyes and counted slowly, one, two, three...
By the time he had reached one hundred fifty three, Ash's breathing had calmed and was no longer coming through pained gasps of airs. Still holding to his chest, he leaned himself on a bookshelf. The shelves were to the wall so Ash had no fear of knocking them over and creating a giant mess that would no doubt have taken hours to clean.
Ash's body was calmed down but not his mind. It's just a dream, nothing to worry about. The thought wasn't reassuring in enough so the Human had to whisper it out loud. "Just a dream, all just a dream," he muttered. He hated how shaken he sounded.
Was it a dream, though? It felt so real, like it actually happened. Like a memory. Or at least, similar to a memory.
Cautiously, Ash removed his hand from his chest, fearful of what he would find. He sighed in relief when all he saw were nail markings. No gaping hole. No bloody stab wound.
Ash shook his head. Why had he expected any different? Was it all because of a nightmare, a simple vision that was already fading away? He couldn't even recall any of the details anymore. Just some yelling and then a sharp object slicing through his chest and ripping out his heart.
Were the nightmares just another side-effect of the transformation spell? Ash made a mental note to inform Twilight later. Right now, he could hear the little Unicorn and her draconic assistant snore away. No reason to interrupt their slumber over a silly dream.
Another possibility floated into his mind, like a flatulence from the deepest parts of his conscious: guilt. Guilt was what caused the dreams, the dark visions.
Ash shoved the thoughts out of his head with the help of the memory of Princess Luna's wise words. He had no reason to be guilty. He went over this before. I saved my world from a fate worse than death. Many may have died but if I hadn't taken the Essences with me...I shouldn't need a reminder. Why do I need a reminder?
Because you're guilty said the little dark part of his brain. Ash considered bashing his head open with the bookshelf but decided he didn't want to cause another big mess for his host to clean. Something told him Twilight wouldn't be to happy to find her books covered in brain and blood.
Ash closed his eyes and opened them. It was no use; sleep wouldn't return. With a yawn and a stretch, he got up carefully to avoid the low ceiling. He found the hole his horn had gorged in during his short career as a party decoration and game. Painful as it was, Ash couldn't help but smile at the memory.
Memories are like visions; we only see what we wish to see and filter out the rest.
His master's words reminded him of a technique he had been taught as a calming exercise. Ash looked around and concluded that the library was not an ideal location. He'd have to find somewhere else.
He looked to the door. No, going outside as a Human was too dangerous, far too risky. However...
Ash opened his mind, letting his invisible conscious search the town. Nothing, he couldn't feel anyponies out and about. Ash's brow furrowed as he doubled his concentration. Still nothing. Everypony was still in there beds, sleeping. No one in town was awake at this hour, save for himself. It would safe, no one would see him. Probably.
Ash quickly found some paper and scribbled down a note for Twilight. After making sure it would be easily found, Ash slowly opened the door. He was beginning to wish he had studied up on some stealth spells.
Peeking outside, Ash saw with his physical eyes what he had seen with his mind eye: nothing. Satisfied that he was truly the only being awake in town, the Human began to sneak through town in a manner that would have driven any rouge to suicide. Arlrand would have shot him herself for such an insult to stealth.
As the Human made his way through Ponyville, he was completely unaware of the pair of light blue eyes that followed him.
*****
Perfect. Ash looked around the quiet little meadow. He had deviated from the main path of the forest but was positive he could find his way back.
Pleased with the setting, Ash sat down with his legs crossed. He folded his hands and placed them over his knees. Closing his eyes, Ash opened his mind, freely exposing himself to the lives and essences around him, just as he had been taught so long ago.
*****
"Remember this technique and remember it well."
Ash fought off a groan. The Archmage said that about everything he taught, from pyrotechnic mastery to the art of pruning. He still had much respect for his master and listened intently but secretly wished that the old man would start every lesson that way.
"This technique was developed by the Elves in order to control their abilities to connect to nature. Humans have adopted it." The Archmage sat down, crossing his legs. Ash imitated him.
"Do many mages use it?" asked the young Ash.
The Archmage scowled and shook his head. Ash squinted as the shine of the old sorcerer's balding head threatened to blind him. "Not as many as there should be. Most of the Human who do mediate are monks."
He cleared his throat. "Now, mediation is the art of separating yourself from yourself and becoming one with the world."
If Ash hadn't been told that, he probably could have guess this was an Elvish technique based off that description.
"To do that," the Archmage continued, "you must first open your mind. Empty your thoughts, everything. Let it go."
Ash shut his eyes and concentrated. Nothing happened.
"This isn't something to think about," his master said, shaking his head. "If you are concentrating, which I know you are, you're thinking. Stop thinking. Empty everything and let it all go."
As vague as the Archmage's advice was, Ash tried his best to follow it. Slowly, he began to relax, to feel almost sleepy. His muscles went loose as did his mind.
"Good. Now let it go."
Slowly, Ash felt himself being pulled. It wasn't astral projection. No, he was still in his body. At least, he could still feel it.
His head drooped heavily. That's when it hit him like a fist to the face.
Lights everywhere, bright and blinding. He wasn't seeing them; his eyes were still closed after all. It was more of a feeling, yes a feel.
They were coming from everything, from everywhere. Tiny little candles beneath him. Giant burning torches in what he suppose was the direction of the forest. Small mobile lanterns, some bigger and brighter than other, hung in the gigantic torches and yet he could distinguish them from the other. There was a particular flame next to him, which burned with such intensity Ash was frightened of being burnt.
Ash opened his eyes and fell over, his breath labored. He looked up to his master.
"What was that?"
"Not bad, not bad." The Archmage stroked his beard in approval. "You've managed to last a full six seconds and without pissing your pants. Don't tell Hari I mention the second part, I don't think he'd like to be reminded."
"What was that?" Ash repeat.
"That was life. Every light you saw there was a life, the essence that separated us from a clump of stones." The Archmage stood up, pushing Ash back down as the student tried to follow. "This technique, while extremely intense and relatively uncontrollable in this form, can be extremely useful when refined. Eventually, you'll be able to find and detect only certain essences you wish to find rather than every living thing in proximity. Damn useful when you're trying to track someone or a certain type of living beings or determining the numbers of your enemies. From there, you will also learn how to differentiate between magic and life."
The Archmage brushed the dirt off of his robes. "But for now you will practice mediation until you are no longer completely overwhelmed. For the next week, you will rise before sunrise and mediate in this clearing for three hours. Then you will join Hari and Rez in their mediation sessions. Understand?"
"Yes, master."
*****
Ash opened his eyes to the sound of an angry growl. The sun had risen, filling the clearing with light. A large winged lion stood in the center, snarling at the Human. The lion's barbed tail sliced arcs in the air menacingly, reminding him of the desert scorpions, some which were just as large as the creature before him.
Ash slowly got to his feet, careful not to trip over the trails of his robe. The beast roared again, brandishing a set of bone-crush teeth. The Human looked around him, searching for an exit. He found one. Problem was, the lion-thing was what stood between him and the exit.
Another snarl. The beast had been testing him, both curious and fearfully of what the strange thing before it would do. Now it had grown impatient and decided to satisfy its curiosity by finding out how Humans tasted.
Ash had no choice to stand and fight. He spread his legs apart and clutched his fists. Silently, he prayed that the creature was not fireproof.
"Alright, kitty. Hope ya like dark meat."
Ash swung his hoof in the direction of the wing lion-scorpion (Manticore Ash remembered. That was it.), expecting a mighty fireball to engulf the beast.
Wait, hoof?
"Aw, sh--"
Ash's curse was cut short as he lost balance and fell over on his belly. He rolled to the side to avoid the jaws of the manticore. They never came.
The beast had fallen over, onto it's back. A guttural growl came from the manticore, different from the sounds it had made before. Not of anger, more of amusement. It almost sounded as if...
It was laughing at him. If he hadn't been so busy sneaking around the beast, Ash would have been offended. Right now, however, as the grey-coated Unicorn found the main road and tore out of the forest, was not the best time to deal with insults or nurse his hurt ego.
*****
Big Macintosh, proud member of the Apple family, set his baskets beneath the apple tree, giving the tree a quick inspection. Applejack was doing the same in a different section. Applebloom had left for school. Big Macintosh could hear the school bells from here and glanced over in the direction of the school with a wistful look on his face that disappeared as soon as it appeared. The red stallion went back to his tree.
It was a good tree with plenty of ripe juicy apples. Yes, these apples were ready to be harvest.
Running a few calculations in his head, Big Mac readjusted his baskets so that they would catch a greater portion of the falling apples. Taking a few light knocks on the truck, he found the optimal location to buck, where he could buck down a majority of the fruit without taking the tree down as well. The farmpony lifted a leg to kick.
A blur of grey was his only warning before Big Macintosh had discovered that his job had been stolen by a dazed Unicorn, who crashed into the hard tree and created a shower of grey and red fruits and laid before him, clutching his head. At least Big Mac's calculations were correct as each apple fell directly into each of the large baskets.
Big Mac's straw stalk fell from his mouth. Ash's groan brought the Earth pony back down to earth and the red stallion turned his attention to the grey Unicorn.
The red stallion considered contacting the hospital. The new pony had hit the tree hard and with his head too. Big Macintosh had heard rumors that Unicorns were extremely sensitive at their heads and were more susceptible to concussions.
The Unicorn was breathing for the time being but he couldn't stay here. Big Macintosh picked him up, ignoring the fur that was getting into his mouth, and tried to throw him over onto his back. It was harder than he thought and the other stallion was heavier than he looked.
"Watcha got there?"
Big Mac turned his head, swinging the Unicorn into the tree. More apples fell. Applejack got closer.
"Is that a pony you've got 'tween yer teeth?"
"Mmph."
"What? Can't hear yah."
"Eeyup." The grey stallion fell to the ground with a thud. Another groan escaped the Unicorn, indicating that he was at least still living.
Applejack got a closer look. "Why, that's Ash, tha new guy. What's he doin' out here? What happened to him? Big Mac, you didn't buck him, did you?"
"Nnope."
The two siblings got Ash onto Big Macintosh's broad back. "Let's get him inside n' see if Granny's got anythin' for him."