This Little Pony Went to the Market
Ash examined the collection of colorful stands run by colorful merchants. Ponies ran to and fro, bargaining and haggling and advertising. As voices began to rise over the price of tomatoes, Ash felt strangely nostalgic.
"Ah, the market. My old enemy."
*****
"You there! Yes, the Mage in blue robes. I have what you want for low, low price. Potions, staffs, robes, you name it, I've got it!"
Ash reached into his pocket for his wallet. All he found was a hole.
"Damn it."
"What's up?"
Sethiop and Dorian stood behind him, both holding large pieces of candy thanks to the Dwarf's natural bargaining abilities. A new hunting cap adorned Sethiop's head as well. Being prince had many benefits that being the Archmage's student did not, one of which included a near limitless allowance.
"Lost my wallet. Must've been that girl I bumped into earlier."
"Again?" Dorian shook his head and clicked his tongue. "Boy, must we go through this every time we visit the market? Ach, you attract thieves like flies to honey."
Sethiop chuckled as he pulled out a few coins for his friend to borrow. "You need deeper pockets for that dress of yours."
"It's not a dress!"
*****
"Here Spike. I think there are a few more here."
Spike ran to the location Rarity was indicating and began to dig. Unlike other times, however, the young dragon chose to dig with a small spade rather than his normal choice of claws and his tail.
The shovel was made for ponies and was held awkwardly in Spike's claws. The retrieval of the gemstones took much longer and Rarity could help but feel slightly disappointed by the stack of jewels in the wagon. Normally they would have found almost double their current amount.
Always a lady, Rarity refused to whine. Complaining she could have done but didn't. The Unicorn had seen how hard Spike had been working and it didn't seem fair to belittle him for his lack of speed. Perhaps he was simply tired. Rarity resolved to have a little chat with Twilight later about how hard she had been pushing her number one assistant.
Spike carefully picked up the gems that had been uncovered. "Sorry Rarity, no emeralds this time."
The seamstress sighed. "It's fine. Just put them with the rest."
As the dragon waddled over to the wagon, Rarity began to notice how much Spike's scales seemed to gleam in the sun, like jewels. Why hadn't she noticed it before? Did those scales always shine like that before?
Spike meanwhile pulled out a handkerchief and wiped a bit of dust off him. As careful as he tried to be, the baby dragon just couldn't protect every part of him from dirt. He only hoped that Rarity wouldn't be too disgusted by how dirty he'd end up.
Sweat dripped from Spike's brow as he fought with the shovel. If he had known that the sweat was washing away much of the dust and polished his scales so that they appeared like gems in the sun, Spike would not have accused his body of trying to ruin his date by secreting the disgusting fluid.
If only I had time to ask Twilight for a full beard before I left. Even just a mustache would've been nice Spike thought as he heaved the spade over his shoulder.
*****
"Let's see..." Ash levitated the bag of gold coins and sighed in relief. "Good, an entire ten minutes without encountering a single pickpocket. Now, what's first?"
As the grey Unicorn put the bag back into the saddlebag and took out the rolled up parchment, he was struck by a sudden feeling of dread. He still couldn't read Equestrian. Twilight didn't know that and if she made the list...
Ash released his breath as he saw that each item was expressed through a little image. While that solved the issue of being illiterate, Ash wasn't sure if the first things Twilight wanted were tomatoes or apples.
"You there! Yeah you! You look like you could use sum apples!"
Guess that settles it, apples it is. Ash turned to the direction of the salespony and found himself face to face with a small cream-coated pony with a red bow in her red mane. Have I seen her before?
"Well, howdy Ash."
The stallion looked up. Applejack stood at the stand, surrounded by bushels of apples. "Hi. So this is your stand eh?"
"Yes siree!" the younger pony piped in. "Finest apples you'll evar find in all of Equestria, grown right at Sweet Apple Acres. Best apples you'll evar eat, play with, or make fine art with!"
"Play with? Fine art?"
Applejack chuckled nervously. "Yah'll have tah pardon mah sister. She so creative."
"'Sall right." Ash picked up a granny smith, admiring how perfectly shaped it was. No lumps and a perfect shade of green. "How much--"
"YOU TOUCH IT, YOU BUY IT! We no longer accept credit."
Ash cautiously placed the apple back. "Is that really store policy?"
Applejack shook her head and gave her little sister a glare. "Sorry bout that. Thought Ah'd give her another chance at apple-selling. Don't know what Ah was thinkin'."
"That's fine, really. In all honesty, this has been probably the best market experience I've ever had."
"No kidding'?" The orange farmpony chuckled. "What are yah doin' out here anyways? Thought yah'd been doin' research wit Twi or at least recoverin' from the beatin' yah got from RD durin' tha party. Yah'd make a great piñata if yah were actually filled wit candy."
"Hah hah. Actually I'm just getting some groceries for Twilight." Ash pulled out the checklist. "First thing's apples."
"Those look more like tomahtoes. That stand's way yonder. But feel free tah buy some apples."
"For a merchant you're awfully honest." The grey Unicorn levitated a few coins out of his bag. "This enough?"
"Sure is. Here yah go. Be sure tah come again soon!" Applejack waved goodbye and mentally patted herself on the back for serving and winning another customer.
"Yah see, Applebloom? That's how yah sell apples. Yah've gotta have tha right attitude and strike--Applebloom?"
The filly had become strangely and uncharacteristically quiet. "That stallion, he didn't have a Cutie Mark."
"Tat so? Huh, didn't notice. Hey, where do yah think yer goin'?"
"Sorry sis, I've gotta get the rest of the Crusaders together."
"Ah thought yah were goin' tah help me tahday!" Applejack called over to the quickly shrinking Applebloom as she ran toward the horizon.
"No time! We've gotta find our special talents 'fore we're as old as that guy!"
*****
"Stop moving around," hissed Twilight.
"You'll blow our cover."
"But Twilight," Pinkie Pie protested. "Three bits for tomatoes is outrageous!"
As Ash pulled out the coins he thought he saw the nearby bushes move.
"Ya gonna pay or what?" the salesmare said impatiently. "I haven't all day ya know."
"Oh, right. Sorry." Ash quickly handed over the money and received a few tomatoes in exchange. Carefully, he slipped them into the saddlebag and left the tomato booth. The stallion glanced over at the bush again. No movement. No reason to investigate. Maybe I should set it on fire just in case...
"Hey, buddy." The pony behind him tapped his shoulder. "Quit holdin' up the line."
"Sorry." Stop acting so paranoid Ash told himself. This place is peaceful, nothing to worry about.
Twilight jotted down a few notes as she held back her friend.
"Unhand me, Twilight. I gonna give that mare a piece of my mind. Three bits for tomatoes? Bah!"
Twilight released a frustrated sigh. "We don't have time for that now. I've got to report to Princess Celestia on how Ash is integrating into Equestrian society." The Unicorn returned to her notes. "'Subject is extremely gullible and easily persuaded by marketers. Acts otherwise suspicious of his surroundings and checks his money and behind him frequently'."
"But Twilight--"
"No buts Pinkie. If we interfere, we won't know how Ash is currently adapting."
"But--"
"I know it's painful to watch but this is a learning experience for him as much as it is for us."
"You do realize he's using your money, right?"
"...Let's go talk to that mare."
As the duo stepped out of their hiding place to confront the stand owner, Ash took out the grocery list to check the next item. "Asparagus, huh."
Ash scanned the marketplace for the asparagus stand. What luck, there isn't even a line.
The stallion galloped awkwardly toward the stall selling the unusual shaped vegetable. Running on four legs would take some time getting used to, Ash concluded as he tripped and rolled the last few feet, stopping with a soft thud as he crashed into the asparagus stall. Ponies screamed as they ducked and dodged flying stalks of asparagus.
Dazed, he looked up to find the owner giving him a funny look from between his back legs which were propped up by the stand's remains.
Slowly, Ash removed his legs from the support of the stand, picked himself up, and took the pack of asparagus out of his mouth. "How much?" Ash asked, holding up the bundle, hoping to save a little face.
"Um, excuse me but..."
"That'll be two bits," the store owner said with a cold stare. A stalk of her own product laid on top of her hat.
"...um, see, I was..."
Ash fished out a couple of gold coins, relieved that the incident was coming to a close without high consequence.
"And seventy bits for the store damages." As if in emphasis, the stall's final foundations collapsed. "And another fifty for all the damages to the merchandise." The stalk of celery fell off the mare's head.
Ash emptied the entire bag of money in front of the stall keeper. "That enough?" Oh God, she actually counting.
"...actually, I don't really mind but you could have asked..."
"You're two bits short."
The grey Unicorn bit back a curse. With an aggravated sigh, Ash returned the stalks of asparagus he had consider of buying and left, filled with embarrassment and, for some reason, an unshakable sense of guilt. What was he feeling guilty about? Probably for wasting Twilight's money like that, yes, that was it.
Fluttershy sighed as Ash left the stall. As much as she hated when ponies ignored her and simply cut in front of her, the kind Pegasus had to feel sorry for the grey stallion after seeing him in such a humiliating position. The least she could do was forgive him, right?
"One stalk of asparagus please."
"Sorry, we're closed."
Forgiveness just became a little harder.
*****
"Well, that could have gone better." Twilight's ear flattened against her head in shame.
"Twilight, you're scary when you get angry." Despite her words, Pinkie Pie didn't seem the least bit frightened. Her grin was wide as ever and her voice was as bubbly and bouncy as she was. "Were you actually going to turn her into a tomato?"
"Of course not. There are laws against that. I shouldn't have threatened her either. How would Princess Celestia look if her student was turning ponies into vegetables?"
"I thought tomatoes were fruits."
"In terms of botany, they are. But after the court case Nyx v. Herdden, tomatoes are classified as vegetables for culinary purposes and when dealing with import taxes. But that's besides the point. I can't go around casting spells on ponies I don't like." Twilight glanced around to make sure there weren't any guards patrolling (seeing that they were in Ponyville, there weren't) before adding under her breathe, "At least, not in public."
"Would you like to be cheered up? I know the perfect song!"
"No thanks. Hey, what's going on over there?"
A crowd had formed around the asparagus stand, or at least, what was left of it.
"Listen lady, does it look like I can do business? Go bother some pony else."
Twilight and Pinkie managed to wiggle through the crowd. In the center stood Fluttershy and the store owner.
"...No."
"Excuse me?"
"No. This is the only asparagus stand opened today and I refuse to leave until I have been served." Fluttershy gestured with a wing behind her. "Look at all the ponies who are still waiting for their asparagus. You've still got plenty of produce to sell and I'm not leaving till I have bought my share."
"Yeah Fluttershy!" Pinkie Pie whistled loudly. "You show her who's the assertive one! Yeah!"
At the sound of Pinkie Pie's voice, Fluttershy began to blush and shrink. "I, I mean, if that's okay. I can always come back tomorrow..." Fighting for herself was hard enough; having an audience doubled the difficulty.
"Ugh." Pinkie smacked herself in the forehead and fell backwards. "So close."
The salesmare humphed. "Does it look like I'll be back in business anytime soon?"
"The day after then?"
"..."
"Next week?"
"Well, this all very interesting," Twilight jumped in, hoping to diffuse the current tension. "But I'm sure we've all got plenty to do today so..." The Unicorn prodded her shy friend away from the fuming salespony. "...let's all go back to our own businesses shall we?" Twilight added a little nervous laugh as she and Fluttershy left the vicinity of the former asparagus stand.
When they were safely away, Fluttershy let out a breathe of relief. "Oh thank you Twilight. I'm not sure what would have happened if you hadn't shown up."
"I thought you had it under control," the Unicorn said with a smile.
"Yeah!" Pinkie Pie agreed. "You were like grr! and everypony was like ahh! You sure showed 'em who's boss." Pinkie Pie took a swing at the empty air causing Fluttershy to squeak and duck down. "Oops, sorry."
"Oh, I hope I wasn't too harsh." The Pegasus turned to the stall. "Maybe I should apologize...I'd better apologize..."
Twilight fought to urge to bury in head in the dirt in frustration. Luckily, she kept herself busy by keeping Pinkie Pie from doing exactly that. One step forward, two steps back the Unicorn thought as she lifted the pink Earth pony a few inches off the ground.
"Say, Fluttershy, what happened there?"
"Oh, you didn't see?"
Twilight shook her head. "It looks like a stampede went through. Or was it Rainbow Dash again?"
"No, it was--"
"No, it wasn't Rainbow Dash," Pinkie answered, suspended in the air. "If it was Rainbow Dash, my knee would be all pinchy. Or my tail would be twitching, usually both."
"Did Applejack try to corral bunnies again?"
"No, it was--"
"If it were bunnies, my dear Twilight, all the asparagus would have been eaten."
"Um--"
"Besides," Pinkie Pie added, "Applejack's busy with her own stand today."
"Why do you even have that pipe with you?"
"Oh, Twilight, I have--"
"It was Ash!"
Twilight and Pinkie turned to the meek yellow Pegasus, both wearing faces painted surprised by the sudden interruption. "I'm sorry, what was that?" Twilight asked.
"It was Ash," Fluttershy repeated with much less force. "He was trying to run and tripped and crashed into the stand. Oh, I was so worried and even a little scared. A lot of ponies were hit by stalks of asparagus. I hope no pony lost an eye. Oh, and Ash looked a little shook up too. I hope he's alright."
"Ash did all that...by tripping?"
"Wow, those stalls aren't as sturdy as they look. Hey Twilight, are you gonna write an angry letter to town hall like you did when Spike--"
"Please don't remind me right now," Twilight interrupted. To Fluttershy she asked, "Did you see where Ash went afterwards?"
"I'm sorry but he left in such a hurry and looked like he wanted to be alone so I didn't follow." Fluttershy shook her head sadly. Part of her mane fell over an eye. "I should have said something to him. Poor Ash, he looked so embarrassed after he gave all his money to pay for the damages. I'm sorry."
"It's fine," Twilight reassured her friend. "You don't need to apologize. If anything, I should be the one apologizing." The Unicorn turned to Pinkie Pie. "You were right; we should have been there helping Ash instead of throwing him out there and and just watching. Sorry."
"Well, don't be apologizing to me cuz I don't remember saying any of that." Pinkie wrapped a leg over Twilight's shoulders. "But thanks anyway," she added.
Twilight sighed. "Alright, right now our first priority is to find Ash and start comforting him. If this is anything like the incident with Spike, he'll be sulking on the park benches. Hopefully, we'll find him before he gets too depressed. Pinkie Pie..."
"On it! I need streamers, balloons, and some sheet music. Oh, and can somepony give me a tuning note? I think I'm a bit flat."
"Actually, Pinkie, I was thinking of doing this in a more intimate, quiet manner." The pink party pony gave Twilight a blank look. "Without streamers or songs," the Unicorn added.
"But...aww. Can I at least hum? Maybe bring one tiny, teeny balloon?"
"As long as you do it quietly and the balloon doesn't explode into streamers," Twilight consented.
"What should I do?" Fluttershy asked.
"Well, I'd hate to take time out of your schedule. I know you still have plenty to do today," Twilight began. "But if it's alright with you, could you look around and see if Ash is still in the market."
Fluttershy nodded her head and took to the sky. Pinkie Pie and Twilight watched her fly off for a few moments. Final, the Unicorn torn her eyes from the sky and turned them toward the matter at hand.
*****
Spike pulled the heavy cart of gemstones behind him. In addition to the desired emeralds, they had also found a collection of others. Tons of tantalizing topazes, dozens of dazzling diamonds, sparkling scores of sapphires, glorious garnets galore. Spike struggled to keep his sweat from mixing with his salvia as the jewels seemed to call to him.
"Come on, Spike! It's getting late," called the real jewel of his day.
Spike hurried over to Rarity's side, trying to make up for lost time. It was getting late. The two had spent much more time looking for gems today only to find the same amount they would have on a shorter day.
Spike blamed himself for taking so much time. A hole that normally took seconds to dig took minutes as he struggled to keep the dirt of his scales. Not that it really matter, the baby dragon thought. After today, Rarity'll think I'm too slow or this job's too big for me he told himself sadly. She'll never ask for my help again.
Spike tried to catch a quick glance at the white Unicorn, only to duck down in embarrassment as Rarity turned to face him. Besides a few polite inquiries of the other's lives and homes and the dull topic of the weather, very little conversation had been made.
The boutique was coming into view. Spike pushed himself to say something, anything. To apologize for his sluggishness, to assure her that next time would be better, to beg for another chance. Funny thing about dragon tongues, you can twisted them in so many positions but they only get tied when you try to talk about something serious.
Spike tried to undo the knot in his tongue, both literally and metaphorically. He opened his mouth to speak.
"Well, here we are," Rarity said in front of her business and home.
"Huh?" Spike looked up, and sure enough, Carousel Boutique stood before him. "Oh, right." Rarity opened the door before he had finished considering doing that himself and holding it for her.
"Goodness, it's getting dark." Rarity looked out into the sunset. Spike followed her glance. It was beautiful and a little saddening.
"Yeah, well, I hope you finish your project soon. Sorry we, I took so long. Maybe next time, huh."
"Spike..."
"Um, well, see you around, I guess," Spike finished lamely. He rubbed the back of his neck. If this was a date like Ash had said, it had been a disaster. Maybe he really didn't have a chance. Spike turned to leave.
"I don't mind how long we took. In fact, I'm quite proud."
"Huh?" The dragon stopped and spun around. "You're proud?"
Rarity nodded. "I noticed how much care you took in keeping your appearance up, even if you spent a little long with the digging. But that just meant we got to spend a little more time together."
At the elegant Unicorn's kind words, Spike's spirits were elevated. They rose even higher at the sight of Rarity's magnificent smile.
"Would you like some snacks before you go?" The door to the boutique were held wide open. "I'm sure I can spare a few gems for my favorite little dragon."
"Would I?" Spike had to fight back the urge to dash into the building to prove himself more than just a kid. Spike opted to skip instead, dragging the wagon closely behind him.
Perhaps today wasn't a complete failure.
*****
Whelp, today was a complete failure.
Ash leaned against the hard wooden bench, facing the sunset. What should have been a natural position felt so awkward as a pony. One wondered why these seats even bothered having backrests.
The borrowed saddlebag laid next to him, soggy with tomato juice mixed with homemade apple sauce and water. Ash had spent hours running from animals before he realized the attracting aroma coming from the bag. At least the flies went away after he fell in the river.
Pride was all that kept Ash from returning to the library with the empty saddlebag and wallet. Pride was an unfortunately high hurdle however and was why the grey stallion sat on the hard bench. The sun was orange in the horizon and it's warmth was fading. He shivered, scattering water droplets from his coat and mane.
Hey, cheer up he told himself. You've had worse.This isn't the worst time you've had in a market...
He was lying and he knew it. Sure he hadn't set the entire place aflame and spent a night in jail but somehow, today felt lousier. He hadn't just embarrassed himself in front of the whole town, he let Twilight down. He had been eating her food, taking up space, taking up her time. Now he had lost all her money while trying to a simple favor, a favor he owed. And her bag was soggy and stained.
Ash sighed and closed his eyes. It was hard trying to fit in, to live as a happy little pony. Maybe he couldn't do it. Maybe he couldn't live here.
The stallion shook his head furiously, trying to rid his mind of such thoughts just as he would have to rid himself of flies. No point in self-pity. I'm here now and all I can do is continue onward.
"There you are! I've been looking for you everywhere."
Ash opened his eyes. Twilight stood next to him. "Apparently, not here."
"I actually looked here first. Where were you after what happened at the asparagus stand?"
"Oh, you know." Ash waved his hoof in the air. "Wandering around. Getting chased by wild animals. Falling into rivers. You know, the sort of thing you do after completely destroying someone's business."
Underneath the stallion's light-hearted manner, Twilight could detect traces of bitterness.
Ash stared into the sunset. "I, uh, lost all your money. Sorry, but I'll earn it back, I promise."
"It's fine," Twilight tried to reassure.
"No, no it's not." Ash released a frustrated sigh. "Every since I got here, I've been living off your hospitality. You leave me with one simple task and I couldn't even do that right. I can't just be a burden to everyone else."
"You're not a burden. I--look, I shouldn't have sent you out there without helping you prepare. Friends are suppose to help each other and I should have been with you out there isn't of just watching you struggle." Twilight took a step closer. "I haven't been a very good friend at all."
Ash moved the saddlebags to make room for the purple Unicorn on the bench. In silence, they watched as the sky grew orange as the sun sunk into into the horizon, setting it ablaze.
"I'm sorry. I knew you were still having trouble adjusting but I just threw you out there."
"No, you were right." Ash stretched his forelegs into the sky. "I can't just cooped up a library all my life. If I'm ever going to get use to Equestria, I need to live it." He turned and faced Twilight.
Brown eyes met purple ones. "I'll help."
"Wouldn't expect anything less from a friend."
Ash turned back to the sunset with a genuine grin.
"Aren't you uncomfortable in that position?" Twilight asked.
"Nah, after awhile you get used to it."
"You're stuck, aren't you?"
"For hours. Help me up please."
*****
Dear Princess Celestia,
Getting use to a new life is never easy. Settling down, making new friends, adjusting takes time and effort. But adapting to a new place can be made easier with the help of a friend.
A friend can help a pony settle down in any situation. Whether it's through giving them a tour of the town, offering a quick meal, or even having an entire welcoming party in their honor, the simplest act can help a pony feel welcomed.
Today I learned that no matter how a pony appearances, no matter how tough or experienced they seem, if they're new they will struggle with the changes. The least we can do is offer our friendship and help them adjust. And sometimes, that's all they need.
Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle
P.S. I've also have discovered that laws demanding restraint in magic use, while well-purposed in the intent of protecting other ponies, should be amended in the regard of rude, obnoxious salesponies. Please do consider.
P.P.S. Out of funds. Send some soon.