"DISCORD!!"
The abrupt, glass-shattering pierce of the scream that came from the princesses was enough to make any pony in ear shot think the mischievous draconequus had replaced their hair with spiderwebs with the spiders still on them. Perhaps Discord had turned the floors of the castle into maple syrup and the ceilings into half-chewed gum? Or maybe he had turned the princesses' many statues in the gardens to life and made them terrorize the guards with ceaseless amounts of bad opera singing? All would be excellent guesses, but none would come close to what he had REALLY done to the two sisters.
It had started when Discord was waiting in the throne room for Celestia so he could do his little monthly checkup. Granted, he didn't really have to attend them anymore, but he still enjoyed pestering the princess of the sun with annoyingly playful nonsense from time to time. So, the embodiment of chaos sat there in the throne room, curled up with a copy of "How to Make Friends Without Really Trying", waiting for Celestia and Luna's return from her banquet. However, this banquet was different from most of her others. Instead of the usual upper-class citizens they often held a banquet for, Celestia and Luna decided to have lunch in the most public of places in all of Canterlot - the Starswirl the Bearded Public Park for Imaginative Learning.
Or you could just refer to it as "the park", ponies would still know what you're talking about.
So, Discord sat there waiting and waiting... until he heard a near barbaric shout come from behind the massive double doors at the far end of the room.
"That was HORRIBLE!"
Judging by the amount of force and emphasis that was placed in those three words, Discord assumed that it was Luna who had shouted with distress. Discord also assumed that this would mean something interesting was about unfold. So with a swift snap of his fingers, he made his hardcover book disappear and himself form into the structure of the stained glass windows.
Just as he had contorted his body to match with the picture in the glass, the doors burst open with Luna entering first, and Celestia behind suit. They trotted right past the window Discord had cloaked himself in (seriously, he had done this countless times before; why don't they check the windows? Have they learned anything?) and straight to the steps below where they sat with a heavy grief.
"I can't believe how inconsiderate we looked back there!" Luna sulked with her head hung.
"Come now, Luna. It wasn't that bad," Celestia tried to cheer, but didn't seem to believe in her own words. "I'm sure the locals thought nothing of our behavior."
"I'm afraid I highly disagree with you, sister. You must've not seen the looks of disgust on the faces of those ponies."
Hmm, interesting. Discord thought to himself. The two royal princesses having behavioral issues? This could be a rather amusing spectacle to hear. Now ever since the Tirek incident a few months ago, Discord had been on his sharpest behavior. He hadn't used his magic in any ill-will and had kept his 'playfulness' to a minimum. That being said, he still managed to enjoy himself in some forms of chaos. He may not have been the one causing it, but Discord still enjoyed being a spectator.
"I felt like such a fool, Celestia!" Luna continued. "I acted as if I knew what these ponies went through everyday, but I don't truly understand them."
"I'm afraid I am to blame for this as well," Celestia admitted with a sigh. "I too portrayed myself to know what it is like to be a commoner, but I suffer from the spoils of royalty to truly understand." There was a short silence that followed with Luna glancing back up at her sister, a small smile present on her muzzle.
"Do you remember when we used be like that?"
Celestia shock her a look of confusion. "What do you mean, Luna?" The princess of the night then glanced back up at the ceiling, nostalgia slowly seeping into her.
"I mean, do you have any memories of how we were like those ponies that we saw in the park?"
"I'm afraid I don't," Celestia responded rather quickly. "We've always been a part of the royal family. We've no idea what it is like to have financial troubles or ailments of the common folk."
"Maybe not financial issues... but we were young once before, sister. We used to be like those ponies. Socially fluent, always in tune with the community, had those young mare problems. What I mean is that we used to understand what it was like to be common, even if we were royalty."
A smile crept onto Celestia's lips as she had thought back to her youth. "Yes, we were normal, weren't we?" Then that smile had vanished almost as fast as it had appeared. "But we're not that kind of pony anymore, and as much as I would like to believe that we can comprehend what the life of an average civilian is, we haven't the slightest idea anymore." Luna's memory fueled smile quickly faded, being replaced by a frown of defeat.
"Yes, I know. It just pains me to be so out of touch with our subjects. I only wish that we could have that understanding once more."
"Yes, if only we could be young again once more and have a chance to understand our ponies."
Discord was now beginning to feel something... foreign. Well, not completely foreign, but it was definitely rare. It was like his chest was tugging out at him, ripping and pulling and begging to be released. It was strange, really. What was that thing Fluttershy had taught him about feelings? It was something specific... empathy... or was it sympathy?... Oh, whatever. Same thing in his mind. He saw how depressed this lack of social recognition obviously made the two princesses, and whatever happened at this banquet must've triggered it somehow.
Now, it was time to plan. Plan for what, though? Discord thought. I normally have no obsessive need to help anypony, but this empathy inside me just seems to say otherwise. Or sympathy. Or- Damn it, who cares! Let's just sedate it and help Celestia and Luna. With that last thought, Discord pushed himself out of the window, hovering above the alicorns.
"Well, maybe you can."
Discord's booming voice caught the attention of the princesses, standing firmly to his descending figure. They had quickly managed to regain their professional composure, but it was utterly pointless.
"Oh, why hello, Discord," Celestia greeted with a forced grin. "Here for your usual behavioral analysis, I assume?"
"Well I was here to meet with you once more and perhaps make your life a bit more 'fun', but it appears I've found something else to occupy myself with," Discord said, shrugging off the minor glare that Luna seemed to be drilling him with.
"And what is this object you have found yourself so appealed to?" Luna questioned, her glare hardening.
"Well you see, it's not really an object I'm speaking of," he replied as he came to eye level with both alicorns. "It's more of an... idea; an idea that can benefit some special friends of mine very greatly." Discord then summoned a chocolate bar that was taller than him and broke a piece off, chomping into it carelessly. He swallowed and held out the chunk in his claw. "Chocolate, ladies?"
"We're fine," Luna stated a bit forcefully. "I'm actually more interested in hearing your 'idea' and who it effects." Discord then snapped his fingers, making the chocolate disappear. He then looked at the princess of the night with an obviously fake set of puppy dog eyes.
"Oh, Luna. You say that like I'm planning some dastardly deed that'll leave the whole world in shambles... I'm hurt..." Discord then shot up like a spring and held his arms out wide. "But no matter! If you really desire to know who this'll be benefiting, then I'll tell you." He then turned himself into a giant mirror facing Celestia and Luna. They both took a second to comprehend before it hit them like a sack of bricks.
"Us??" both the princesses stated in unison.
"YES!" Discord cheered as he reverted back to his default appearance while making confetti cannons burst behind him. "My desire is to aid you both in something you seem to be lacking very much of."
"And what would that be, Discord?" Celestia inquired, shaking off leftover confetti particles from her wings. "We have intensely vast knowledge of the world around us, we have an unnecessarily massive amount of wealth, and we have the loyalty of all our ponies and others than dwell across the land. So I'm sorry to say Discord, but I'm afraid I don't know what we are lacking. Care to enlighten us?"
Discord's smile slowly crept into what used to only show whenever he had a disharmonious plot ready to be engaged. Least to say, it worried both the princesses quite a bit. He then stared at them intently before he spoke in an almost wise and intellectual pattern.
"Celestia, Luna, what you both lack is something that you both seem to desire most: identification." The two ladies in question shot him a glance of confusion, to which Discord's smile grew. "Allow me to elaborate. You see, you two girls are royalty. You have anything and everything that anypony could even imagine to crave for; fame, fortune, and the sweet love and admiration of your little ponies. However, you're beginning to feel guilty - not because of wealth or fame, but because you can't sympathize with your ponyfolk anymore. You desire to understand them and comprehend the difficulties they suffer with on a daily basis. So, in layman's terms, you simply wish to 'get it'."
Neither of them could deny it. Discord had hit the nail on the head, and that nail a rusty and loose one at that.
"How-how did you know, Discord?" Celestia questioned.
"Oh, I simply eavesdropped."
Discord, you troll. The angering glares he received from the ponies was fiery enough to melt Tartarus and make lava evaporate. Oh, he just love seeing their cute little faces whenever they were angry. I should do this more often, he thought while suppressing the giddy laughter that built up in his throat. Oh gosh, this isn't even about empathy anymore. Just seeing them like this is enough to fill up my joy meter for the week. Yet, I still do feel sorry for these two. I really should help them, though. But what to do?...Wait... Ah HA! I got it!
Finally, the chuckle inducing looks of the ponies simmered down, allowing Celestia to speak with clarity.
"Discord, you know you've been taught better," the solar deity shunned Discord like a mother, but it had no affect on him whatsoever.
"Perhaps Sun-butt, but Applejack has taught me that honesty is the best policy, and I wouldn't want to disappoint her." He then rose up and clapped his hands together twice like he turning on one of those clap-on lamps, and within a second, a large book shelf appeared out of a pillow of smoke. "And speaking of those good friends of mine, Miss Element of Magic herself, Twilight Sparkle, gifted me a book as a symbol of our reestablished friendship."
Discord then reached up and pulled out a medium-sized, brown leather covered book. "Ah, 'The Ancient Spell Book of Physical Metamorphosis: A Scripture About Physical Mutations and So Forth '. Quite a dandy little stack of pages, wouldn't you say?"
"Discord, what do you plan to-"
"TRANSPIRITUS, CONFOMITUS, FORMALIUM!!" Discord shouted from the top of his lungs, cutting off the concerned Princess Luna.
Suddenly, the two alicorns were slowly being covered in a blanket of bright green light, encasing them from horn to hoof.
And now, here they were.
Sure, Discord should've asked them what happened at the banquet in the park. Sure, he should've asked their permission if he could cast a spell on them. And SURE, he probably should've informed them that the spell he was casting was going to make them look like young mares again.
But what would be the chaos in that? After all, the looks on their faces before they were encased in the light was priceless.
Worth every bit of lecture I'm going to receive.