(1000 years ago P.O.V James Heller)
"This place has a bar!"
At the sound of my outburst everyone in the area turned to look at me.
Oh look. More pastel colored horse people. South Park almost had it right. Half of the crowd went bugged eyed and ran while the rest just seemed to stare. This lasted all but 5 seconds before the reason I was here made it self known. There were 3 guys towering over a dark blue mare with an emerald green mane in a waitress outfit holding her arm up as if to protect herself. 2 of them were in silver armor with white coats and dark blue manes. The other one had his fist raised. He was dressed in a royal blue suit, had a white coat and blond mane, and was ready to smack a bitch. If this was just your average fight I would of stood to the side and recorded it. But it's not so instead of watching I walked over in hopes of stopping this guy.
"Thou little slut! Thou think that thou can mess with a member of the royal family and get away from it. We protect sorry whores like you and not even receive a little appreciation. Now thou art coming with us and will learn to appreciate the work we royals do for ungrateful wenches like thyself."
Yeah I heard enough I grabbed the asshole's arm before he could torment the girl farther. The reaction I wasn't expecting was for him to quickly turn around and hit me. An audible crack was heard and it didn't come from me. The guy yelled out in pain and gripped what I assume was his now broken hand. I just stood their staring at the bloody appendage. "Damn man you is weak. How in the hell did you hurt yourself from punching me. I do nothing but sit on my ass all day." I don't think he heard anything I said as he was still yelling in pain. His friends turned toward me and both of them pulled out a sword. Me totally not being an idiot like usual stepped back.
"Whoa guys calm down. Can we talk about this. There is no need to go cutting arms off right."
Rule 5 of my rules of life. Never tell a man who is raging to calm down. The one on the left charge me with his weapon raised. I tried to turn and run but he was on me. I raised my arms like the mare on the floor in an attempt to protect myself even though I knew it wouldn't do me any good. He brought the sword down. Then it shattered completely, not even leaving a single cut on my jacket.
Words could not begin to describe the what I was feeling after witnessing that. Both me and the guard just continued to stare. Him at his now useless sword hilt and me at my perfectly fine arms. 3 words were running through my mind. Whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuck.
The guard finally regaining some of his senses drops what's left of his sword and backs away from me. "Monster. Thou art a monster!"
The two guards grabbed their busted hand prince and took of running. I honestly don't even know what to say. I couldn't get the past the thought of me still having an arm. I was pulled out of my thoughts when Annie came up to me.
"Mr. Heller, what happened?" I didn't respond. I just pointed at the mare on the floor. She was staring at me with a look that said she didn't know whether to thank me or run away from me. Good thing Annie was here or we would of just kept like this for who knows how long. Ann went to the mare's side and helped her up.
"Light dear, art thou alright?" Seriously? What is with this girl and asking people if they are okay?
Light looked at Ann and started tearing up. "Oh Annie it was just terrible. Prince Egocentrique came back and threatened to have the tavern close if." The mare was really tearing up now. "If I didn't lay with him."
I am usually a nice guy. There is really only one thing that will piss me off more then someone hurting people close to me and that's people who force their will onto others.
"I don't know anything about this prince douchebag or whatever his name is, but if he stops by again I will make sure it will be his last."
Light just stared at me in horror. "Art thou insane! Thou can't fight a royal. Especially him. It will only cause the rest of us trouble. Maybe even killed."
"Yeah, I don't think I caught your name. Mind telling me it before I decide whether or not an ass needs kicking."
"My name is Light Dancer. I am the owner of this bar. Also I want to thank thee for helping me."
"The names Bond. James Bond." Annie shot me a look that more or less said what the hell are you going on about. Seeing as no one laughed at my stupid attempt of a joke I decided to tell a half truth. "Nah just kidding. I'm James Heller and you don't need to thank me. I can't just stand around when someone abuses another."
"Well thou helped me and I want to thank thee. How would you like to try our house special."
Free food. I need to play hero more often. I took her offer and she led me inside. Inside the building was nothing special. The bar counter with a few drunkards sleeping. A couple tables and booths against the walls. Pictures of random horse people on the walls and a few newspaper clippings in a language I couldn't even read. How in the hell do we speak the same language but not write the same.
Overall the tavern looked no different than any of the ones back home. Minus the pool table and T.V. Oh god I miss TV. How long have I been here? How many of my shows have I missed. Forgive me Daniel Tosh. I got bored of looking at decorations so I took a seat at the counter. Light went in the back to prepare my payment while Annie took a seat next to me.
"Hey Ann. Mind filling me in on what happened back there. Who was that guy?
"He was Prince Egocentrique et Grossier. He's the princesses' nephew. He is also the duke of our town. He uses his title to do what ever he wants and there is nothing we can do to stop him. If we harm him, then who knows what her majesties will do. If today is anything to go by, then Light might lose the tavern."
"If she is worried then you can tell her to stop. I told her before that people like him are the ones I can't stand. If he comes back then I will personally handle him." I stuck my thumb up "Believe it." Did I really just do that. I thank who ever is the deity of this world that they won't get the reference.
"Thou means like how thou handled the Timberwolves." Smugness couldn't even begin to describe the shit eating grin she gave me.
"Hey those wolves caught me by surprise. And that was before I knew that my arms could break a sword. Or did you forget that."
"Okay I will give you that one. Just know that I won't save you next time."
We chatted back and forth like that for a while. She told me about her family, her job, and a little about the town. I told her about my home and family and friends. Eventually Light came back with a plate in her hands.
"Okay what smells good."
"Our special for the night." She put the plate down and I stared in horror. Flowers and Hay. Things I would never eat. Smelling like they were made in heaven's kitchen. Ann was staring longingly at my plate. I can take a hint.
"Um that's okay, I am not that hungry. You can have it Ann." As soon as the words left my mouth my plate was gone. The culprit was stuffing her face.
"What do you have to drink here."
Light grabbed a mug and filled it under the counter. She brought it up and it was filled with foam and what looked like pieces of apples.
"Enjoy the apple family cider."
"I never really had cider before. First time for everything." I grabbed the cup and took a sip. Then I took another. Then I acted like Annie and just shoved the whole thing in my mouth. I drained the tankard and slammed it down. "That has got to be the best damn thing I ever drank."
"I am glad thou liked it cause only the food was free." I fell over anime style. Light and Ann just laughed and soon I joined them.
Yeah I am going to like it here.
(Present P.O.V ??? Location ???)
"Dad, can't you stay a little bit longer?" asked a young filly.
"I would love to princess, but you know I have to go to work. How about this. When I come back I will get you what ever you want. Now be good and remember daddy loves you." With that said he walked off.
"But all I want is you daddy."