"Ok, I get the chains..." Shining Armor said, watching as the Agents of BUTTS worked with the Doctor and the Time Lord Twilight to ship the Evil Twilights back to their own dimensions. Once Baby Twilight had frozen them all in place the battle had finished within seconds with the heroic Twilights the victors. The mixture of chaos and dark magic had made it impossible for even Delirium to escape (and she was too busy mumbling about Derpy Sparkle and the power of muffins). The Doctor had revealed once the battle was done that TL Twi and him had been working with other time travelers (including Doc Brown, Booster Gold, Come-and-go-me, and a bunch of ponies who liked hot tubs) to gather up every Twilight that had appeared in Equestria. The power of the TARDIS and Kinshy's equipment was more than enough to create portals to ship every Twilight back to their correct dimensions. Now the Heroic Twilights, The Elements of Harmony, the Saints, the Time Masters, and the God Squad were watching as the last of the evil Twilights were booted back to where they belonged."But why exactly did we shave their manes off?"
"Because it’s funny!" Spike said with a grin, the electric razor still in his claws.
"And those that didn't have manes got some," Twiley said with a giggle, waving to Darth Sparkle who was now sporting an epic beard that had once been Twiock's tail.
The retrievals had been... interesting... to say the least.
Some worlds had tried to reject taking their evil Twilights back, forcing them to shove the wicked mares into the vortexs and then shutting them down before they could be tossed back out. Other realities, like Twibane’s, had accepted custody and made it clear they were going to make sure the villain was locked up. And then there was the world of Spider-Mare…
"Twiock!" The Pink Goblin said happily, giving the tentacled villain a hug. “I am so excited you are ok! We’ll have to throw a ‘Twiock is alive and back and now we can kill Spider-Mare!’ Party!”
"Thank you so much for helping bring her home," Flutters the Hunter said with a slight blush. It would have been cute if she weren't wearing the skins of several animals like a cloak and the skull of a bear as a helmet.
Twiock looked at her enemies, shaking her hoof. "You will rue the day you-"
"Come on, Twiock, we're going to go to Sugar Cube Corner and get some cupcakes!" Electrodash exclaimed.
"...bye!" Twiock quickly hurried off, the Heroic Twilights all tilting their heads in confusion.
"Ah... surprise twists," Wall Breaker said with a sigh before walking over and grabbing the leader of the League of Evil Twilights. “but sadly for you, there are no twists for you but instead a final goodbye and a promise for vengeance that sets up potential sequels.”
"You won't get away with this!" Nightfall screeched as she was shoved towards the portal to the anti-matter universe. "I'll... uh..." She blinked, looking very Twilight-ish as she searched for what exactly she would do.
"You'll gather an army of like-minded ponies," Twilight Velvet whispered.
"Yes! I'll gather an army of like-minded ponies!"
"You'll prepare for war."
"I'll prepare for war!"
"You'll pay for this!"
"I'll pay for this!" Nightfall blinked, realizing what she'd said. "Mother, I swear you will die first!"
"How sweet," Velvet said dryly. "Flim, Flam? Could you?"
The two brothers nodded and stepped forward. They hadn’t fought in the battle and had, once retrieved by the heroic Twilights, pleaded for leniency, claiming they had been forced to serve as the dark mare’s messengers. Flim pulled out a tuning whistle and blew into it.
Flim and Flam
She tried to beat this nation
This evil mare of sin
But her plan sucked so bad
there was no chance of a win
Now her hopes are dashed
Dreams popped by a pin
She really sucks
She lost it all
Everypony saw her fall
Nightfall
Nighfall
Nightall
She blows
The League of Evil Twilights
Is disbanded once and for all
Velvet's team kicked your flank
so you can suck our... mall
And so dear evil mare
Shut up cause we don't care
Just give up
Be a doll
You can not win
Bye bye Nightfall!
Nightfall let out one final profanity-laden scream as she was shoved through the portal, which Kinshy promptly shut behind her. "And that is the last of the evil Twilights!" The tech wizard of the Ponyville Saints looked around at the last few heroic Twilights who had remained behind. "And I guess this is where we part ways."
"Damn straight," Boss Twi said. "I still need to go drive a horseshoe up Zinyak's ass." The gangbanger looked over at Scootaloo and took off her Fleur necklace, placing it around the little filly's neck. "Ya did good, squirt. If you ever find yourself in my neck of the woods, know the Saints have your back."
"Thanks!" Scootaloo said, knowing that was the only polite response to give a mare that could kill ponies in more outrageous ways than Scootaloo could think of schemes to get cutie marks.
"Let's go already!" Rainbow Gat shouted, already pushing Apple "Motherbucking" Jack into the portal. Rariti rolled her eyes but followed after them with the Proffesor close behind. Boss Twi nodded before leaping through herself with Kinshy and, with a final bzzzzz, the portal closed.
"I'm gonna miss them!" Twipool said.
'I'm not'
"You mean you are going to miss seeing them or miss at shooting them?"
“I thought we pushed you through already!” Coltson complained.
“Meh, what’s one more plothole?”
"Someone shove her into the portal already," Night Light said, rolling his eyes.
"With my last breath, I curse Zoidberg!" Twipool proclaimed. "Always wanted to say-"
BZZZZZZ!
"Well... that leaves us then," GL Twilight said, looking around at the much smaller group of Twilights that were left. "Not that I don't mind waiting to go last... makes sense considering how crazy things have been for us to air on the side of caution, but I don't see why we are sticking around now. I mean, I like you girls but I've got a sector to get back too."
"Me too," Rider said.
"Luna's Rangers are waiting for me," Captain Sparkle stated.
"I'm the one that suggested to Director Night Light that we few Twilights remain," Princess Aurora stated. "We have grown rather close during our time here-"
"Getting drunk and all that," Faith stated, receiving a swift kick to the side from Abstract Twilight for his jest.
"-and the battle against Nightfall and her League proved that we work together as a team."
"You ain't suggestin' we all stick around, are ya?" Zapapple asked. "Cuss yeah, I like ya Princess, even if ya are a magic-usin’ pony, but I wanna git back ta my Mac and my farm."
Princess Aurora shook her head. "Oh no, nothing like that. No, what I am suggesting is a bit...different. Dr. Velvet?"
Twilight Velvet's horn glowed and from a metal briefcase at her side emerged some simple mirror compacts. "While the Doctor was working on transporting the Twilights home I studied the effects of the dimensional rifts and was able to create these." Abstract Twilight took one and let out a yelp of surprise when she saw Sparkle-San staring back at her from the mirror's surface. "These mirrors are a blend of science and technology. They are able to cross the dimensional barriers and serve as communicators. They also can open personal rifts from one dimension to the next... but only if both parties agree to it."
"I think I hear what you say, my friend... with these mirrors this isn't the end?"
"Exactly, Twicora." Night Light began to pace. "You see... I am a pony that believes in diversifying. Things tend to go better when you have many spoons in the kettle corn than trying to cook it all at once."
"Stop, you're making me hungry!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, rubbing her tummy. "I knew I should have asked evil Pinkie and Gangster Pinkie for some snacks! I bet they even hide snacks around here in case of emergency snacking situations!"
Night Light continued on as if he hadn't been interrupted. "Already Equestria is protected by several different groups and agents. The Royal Guard protects Canterlot. The Wonderbolts are our rapid response team. My daughter and her friends, the Elements of Harmony, take on ancient evils and foes. The Doctor, though he doesn't directly work for me-"
"And never will, my good stallion!" The Doctor said with a grin. "Never like to stay in the same place twice, don't want to be nailed down and such.”
"-he and his family protect the Time Stream. Princesses Celestia and Luna have created their 'God Squad' which will deal with international threats that we in Equestria could not legally face."
Polar Vortex laughed. "This Squad sounds like good vesel'ye! How do I join, brat'ya and sestry?"
"We'll see about getting you an interview," Luna said.
"But there will be times when threats will arise from other dimensions that are greater than all the power in our world... or in yours." Night Light leaned forward and grinned. "What I am suggesting, mares and stallions, is the formation of a new team. Nightfall had her League of Evil Twilights... I believe we have the makings of a Legion of Heroic Twilights."
"A...LHT?" Cadence said, brow furrowed. "Those letters don't spell anything related to private parts or buttocks!"
"Yes, I double-checked his work," Velvet said with a smirk, enjoying the way Night Light was glowering at the accusations that everything he named ended up with a dirty-sounding acronym (and the worst part of it was that Velvet was right and he couldn't counter he claim).
"A Legion of Twilights..." GL Twi said, nodding slowly. "That... sounds like a good idea. I mean, I am already part of the Super Friends of Equestria and that has worked out real well for us..."
Captain Sparkle clicked her teeth together. "And as much as I might prefer to work on my own... even I have to admit that there is strength in numbers."
Twizio lowered her hood. "I have long fought with a Siisterhood of like-minded ponies. But to fight with ones such as yourselves would be an honor."
"I would be most honored to be of the great help, many mes," Sparkle-san said with a bow.
"Lets me kill things?" Seafoam Tremor said. "Count me in!"
"That's my girl," Tydal said proudly.
Their decision made the Twilights began to journey back to their own worlds, knowing that this was not goodbye but merely a farewell for now. There were some tears, such as when Luna waved goodbye to Baby Twilight, the foal smiling at her as the Nightmare Moon of her world gathered her up and took her back. There were also promises to keep in touch; Faith's own speech about goodbyes was quickly cut short when everyone decided that they were tired of hearing his monologues.
Soon the only one to remain was Twiley, who took a moment to hug Scootaloo tight. "I know you aren't my Scootaloo but... I am going to miss you all the same."
"Hey," Scootaloo said with a watery smile, "I think that kinda makes me your Scootaloo."
"...yeah!" Twiley said with a grin. "And thanks to the mirrors we can be interdimensional pen pals! I bet we get our cutie marks that way for sure."
"I think you are right," Scootaloo said, giving the little filly a way. "Talk to you later, Twiley."
"You too, Scootaloo!" Twiley waved to them all one last time before darting into the portal.
"Alright, everypony, brace yourselves!" Velvet called out, flipping on a device that looked like something Nikola Tesla would have made (...look him up, kids, ok?). Scootalooo and Spike looked up and, for the first time, noticed the air around them looked to be filled with thousands of fireflies. "That was the last Piece of Twilight... all we have to do is draw them all together... careful... careful... now!" Velvet threw a second switch and the room exploded in lavender light. Those that remained in the transporter room shielded their eyes against the gaze, cringing in pain until, at long last, the light consolidated into a single form.
"Twilight?" Spike asked, taking a step towards the alicorn mare he knew so well. The Twilight that stood before them looked like their Twilight but they'd dealt with enough surprises to know not to judge a book by its cover.
"Blarrrrg," Twilight managed to get out, rubbing her eyes and opening and shutting her mouth like she was chewing on a large piece of chewing gum. "Blag... bla... blorg."
"It’s a King Sombra Twilight!" Cadence shouted. "Quick, somepony throw me at her!"
"Wiggles?" Tydal said hopefully.
"King... Sombra? What?" Twilight looked around in confusion. "What... where the hay am I? Spike? What is going on?"
Spike took a cautious step forward. "Twilight... is thine a word?"
"I don't care what anypony says, Mr. Dictionary doesn't include it so it-
"It's her!" Spike exclaimed, running up and giving his friend a hug. Scootaloo quickly joined him, as did Velvet, Night Light, and Shining Armor.
"AAACK!" Twilight exclaimed. "Seriously, what the hay is going on!"
"Its a long story," Scootaloo said.
"One with many spelling errors and that ripped off at least 30 different intellectual properties!" Wall Breaker said happily.
"Wha?" Twilight said as her friends moved to join in on the hugging. "Seriously, some pony tell me what's going on. Uh, girls? Please? What is... girls! Stop hugging me and tell me what is going on! Girls! Scootaloo! WHAT THE HAY IS GOING ON!?!?"
The End