Edward the changeling sits across from the interrogator. The interrogator has tried to elicit conversation from Edward several times but Edward is unresponsive. Among his problems, Edward was just moved to a cell beside a diamond dog who likes to scratch on his bars in the middle of the night. Edward fights to stay awake in the interrogation room. Gathering up the energy he needs, he speaks. “You’re not very good at your job.” He says, a little feebly.
The interrogator’s expression doesn’t change. “Why is that?”
“You had one question to find out anything from how many changelings are left in Equestria to why we tried to invade Canterlot. Yet, you asked my name. That doesn’t scream ‘expert’ to me.” Edward says.
The interrogator bites his lip. “I thought the changelings tried to invade Canterlot for the love.”
Edward laughs. “Love isn’t exactly a breeze to collect when you’re terrifying the populace. We could neither invade Canterlot for the love directly nor explicitly.” He says.
“Then why invade it at all?” The interrogator asks.
“We wanted to try your donuts.” Edward hisses.
The interrogator frowns. “You’re l-“
“I’m what? Were you going to say I was lying? That would have been rich.” Edward laughs again. “What did you say was the reason you put a diamond dog in the cell next to mine?” He asks.
“Prison overpopulation.” The interrogator responds, automatically.
“Hehe, right.” Edward leans back into his chair.
“How and when did you replace Princess Cadence?” The interrogator asks, changing the subject.
“Funny, I thought Queen Chrysalis replaced her. Can’t be right all the time, I suppose.” Edward responds. The interrogator’s teeth grind together and he looks at the glass for a moment again. “That’s another thing; who is on the other side of that glass?” Edward asks.
The interrogator wipes the panicked expression off his face and sits up straight. “I ask the questions, not you.” He says.
“Be my guest.” Edward replies.
“How and when did Queen Chrysalis replace Princess Cadence.” The interrogator asks.
Edward smirks. “We lured her in with the promise of candy.”
The interrogator slams a hoof down on the table. “Answer the question.” He demands.
Edwards tries to obey the impulse of stroking his chin with a hoof, an effort that proves to be fruitless against his restraints. “I don’t think I will, actually.”
The interrogator motions to the glass and the familiar guards pick Edward up and throw him in his cell.
(*)
Edward sits in the interrogation room, almost sleeping. The interrogator trots in, slamming the door behind him to startle Edward awake. The sleep deprived changeling forces his eyes open to concentrate on the interrogator.
“I trust you slept well.” The interrogator says, impassively. Edward spits. “I take it you’re still having trouble with the diamond dog in the cell next to you.” The interrogator says, the barest hint of a smile creeping up his face.
“You’re a sharp one, you are.” Edward says, sarcastically.
“It would be easier if you just told me what I want to know. You could get a pardon from the Princesses and be let free.”
Edward laughs, hoarsely. “Be let free to do what? If I give you any information, I’m dead. Luckily for me, it won’t be too long before I die here, anyway.” Edward says, smiling up at the buzzing ceiling.
The interrogator frowns. “What do you mean?” He asks.
Edward slumps his head forward until it hits the interrogation table and he stares up at the interrogator. “It’s a secret. Shhhh.” Edward says, laughing again.
The interrogator bites his tongue. “The wounded changeling, she’s dying isn’t she.”
It wasn’t a question, it was a fact.
“She gave me all the love she had collected and now she doesn’t have any more. Bit by bit, you’re killing both of us. Unlike you, we’ll die serving our hive. What do you have? When you die, will you look upon this with happy memories?” Edward asks then shakes his head. “No, you’ll remember this as that time you killed two ponies because they were different than you.” Edward says, thumping his head on the side of the table.
The interrogator stares coldly at Edward, daring him to speak again. “When you said that you couldn’t collect the love, what did you mean?” He asks.
Edward brings his head up until his chin rests on the table edge. “Changeling’s don’t take kindly to job swaps. My job isn’t to collect love.” Edward says, flatly. His green eyes glimmer, slightly, as they look at the interrogator.
“What is your job?” The interrogator asks.
Edward smirks. “Tailor.” He says, snidely.
The interrogator grimaces. “We already know your friend’s job was to steal love. What other jobs could there be?”
Edward shrugs. “Motivational speaking?”
A sign from the interrogator and the guards take Edward away, throwing him into his cell.
(*)
Edward slumps forward in his chair, looking at the interrogator with dead eyes. From what he can gather, the other changeling was ushered off to some hospital, yesterday. The sleeping situation is getting worse and now Edward has to deal with the diamond dog in the cage next to him and the train station, breezing in very loudly at some odd hours, below his cell.
“If not for the love, why did Queen Chrysalis stage the invasion of Canterlot?” The interrogator asks.
Edward rolls his eyes. “You already asked that.” He states.
The interrogator shrugs. “Humor me.” He says.
“Well, since you asked nicely.” Edward taunts.
The interrogator smiles. “You know, Edward, they say the eyes are windows to the soul.” The interrogator says, standing up and trotting behind Edward. Edward stiffens. “When the other changeling, the female one, came in, I noticed a bit of a discrepancy.” He opens the door and retrieves a glass of water. Edward’s eyes follow him, warily. “The female changeling’s eyes,” He motions at his own eyes, “Were blue.” He sits back down into his chair. “Yours are green.”
The interrogator takes a sip of his water. “It could just be about genders, I thought. But, after talking to some eyewitnesses to the invasion, I found that the pupils on Queen Chrysalis’ eyes were green and beyond that every other changeling seen had blue eyes. You could be royalty. No. If you were royalty, they would be pushing to get you back more. It’s not a shapeshifting trick because if you could shapeshift in here you wouldn’t be here. What about your job, eh? You brought up a job change when you said you couldn’t harvest love. What an interesting thought.”
Edward sits motionless, watching the interrogator gesture as he moves along his train of thought. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
The interrogator shrugs. “Perhaps. You have decided not to tell me anything. Naturally, this puts me in a very bad position because I want you to talk to me. I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy our little chats together but through them I just can’t grasp one thing. Do you know what that is?”
Edward grimaces. “Why you talk so much?”
The interrogator takes another sip of water, watching Edward all the while. “I’m afraid not. What I can’t grasp is just what you’re after. I’ve offered you several things and you’ve turned them all down. Escape is impossible and I doubt that anypony plans to break you out after all this time.”
Edward laughs. “I’m not after anything; I’m just sitting here until you shut up. So far, I’ve been disappointed.”
The interrogator takes another glance at the window. “What is your job, then, Edward?”
“Mailmare,” Edward says.
“I doubt you’d be a very good one.” The interrogator comments.
Edward beams. “How interesting: I’m pretty sure that’s the first time you’ve insulted me.”
The interrogator cocks his head and thinks for a moment. “Maybe that’s the first time you’ve told the truth.” He says.
“You don’t like me very much, do you?” Edward asks.
The interrogator looks to the glass. “No.” Edward blinks. “I think you’re obnoxious, cruel, and rude and I have no sympathy for you or your blasted kind. However, fate has dealt me the hoof that, if you cooperate, I am the only pony who can get you out of prison.”
He looks at Edward with a burning disgust. “Truth be told, I can’t decide if I want this to end quickly, so I can get you out of my sight, or if I want this to drag out, so I can watch you slowly deteriorate into nothing.”
Edward slumps back into his chair, speechless.
“Our time is up, today.” The interrogator states, standing up.
The two guards walk into the room and take the frozen Edward to his cell.
(*)