Bon-Bon put her head to the pillow. She couldn't believe what just happened. The tears wouldn't stop flowing out of her eyes. Was Bon-Bon really that awful of a pony that Lyra would pick Twilight Sparkle over her?
The sun had already set and Bon-Bon's room was pitch black. Bon-Bon didn't care. She liked it that way at this point.
She could hear Lyra say from outside, "Bon-Bon, are you okay?"
Bon-Bon figured she might as well answer that question. She just had to do it without crying.
"I am fine, just a little tired."
"Well, get a good rest. I was just um... wondering.. if you had any advice for me for tomorrow."
Date me instead, thought Bon-Bon.
However, Bon-Bon said, "Be yourself, Lyra. That is all it takes."
"That's so sweet of you to say, Bonnie. Thank you."
"I better get some rest." Bon-Bon was doing her best to bottle all of her emotions inside. She couldn't let Lyra know how this twist of events had broken her heart.
"Okay, Bon-Bon. Good night. Don't let the humans bite."
Weirdo, thought Bon-Bon.
To think about it, Bon-Bon rationalized, perhaps Lyra was just a crazy pony. Maybe the sane and intelligent Bon-Bon was too good for the crazy and ditzy Lyra. Why would Lyra go for Twilight Sparkle? Why the hell would Twilight say yes? Twilight, given her royal status, would be able to get any pony she wanted except for the fact that she was socially inept. Yes, that's it. Two socially inept ponies dating one another. Bon-Bon lost because she was too cool to win. That had to be it.
Putting Lyra and Twilight down in thought didn't make Bon-Bon feel any better though... so she stopped thinking such things. Bon-Bon was stupid for not telling Lyra how she felt earlier. In fact, Lyra might have thought Bon-Bon wasn't interested in her. Lyra watched Bon-Bon go through three significant others. Each one was problematic in his or her own way. Bon-Bon silently hoped that Twilight would simply become an ex or a one-date pony for Lyra.
The tears began again. Why would Lyra do such a thing? Perhaps, all Bon-Bon and Lyra were meant to be was friends and nothing more. Bon-Bon had wasted years and years of her life on a unicorn who would never be her own. Bon-Bon didn't want to do anything anymore. She just wanted to hide for the rest of her life. Was this twist worth some major life changes? Maybe Bon-Bon should move out of the apartment and leave Ponyville. If Twilight wasn't so freaking obsessed with her books, she would probably steal Bon-Bon's room.. or nah... Twilight and Lyra would sleep in the same bed and Lyra would joke about needing to find another loser like Bon-Bon to fill the spot. Bon-Bon wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow. She wouldn't be able to... oh, perhaps she could get a three day weekend.
Bon-Bon took out her cell phone and called her boss, Filthy Rich.
"Hello."
"Hi Rich."
"Are you alright? You don't sound too good."
"You're right. I have run into some short-term problems. I was wondering if it was okay if I took tomorrow off."
"Not a problem. You never take vacation anyway. You could use a little rest. Hell, you sound like it. Enjoy your long weekend and I'll see you on Monday."
"Thanks Rich, you too."
There it was. Bon-Bon had three days to figure things out. Her career was the most important thing in the world. Perhaps, Bon-Bon should cut Lyra out of her life altogether and go full steam ahead on her professional life. Maybe, she could meet some shallow, rich pony who would marry her. Wasn't that what Filthy Rich essentially did? The workaholic found a beautiful yet unbearable wife. Bon-Bon had even heard that their daughter was a certified sociopath, but that was from Applejack's little sister and what do kids know?
Bon-Bon started to feel a little better, perhaps the shock of Lyra going on a date with some other pony had worn off. Hmmmm, it was a Thursday night. It was Thirsty Thursday for many ponies in Ponyville. Bon-Bon knew what she was going to do. She would go to the local bar and have a few drinks.. just some girlish fun, you know? Bon-Bon needed to drown out her sorrows anyway and she already bailed on work tomorrow. Hell, she might even meet some cute mare or stallion who would want to fuck her.
Bon-Bon didn't want Lyra to see she was going out though, so she snuck out of the window. Bon-Bon felt like crap. Her sadness had taken over her whole body. But the drink. Yes, the drink. It would solve all of her problems. Bon-Bon walked to the bar trying to keep her head up high.
She went over to the back of the bar where the bartender was making drinks . There was a basketball game on. Hmmm... that definitely looked like a game designed for humans. Ponies had to awkwardly make use of the ball with their front hooves and walk on two legs. Fuck that. Lyra and her stupid humans. They must have fried her fucking brain ages ago. Bon-Bon was glad she didn't have to associate herself with such stupidity much longer. That was now Twilight's problem.
Bon-Bon took a look at the bartender. He was a youngish yellow pegasus with a beer mug for a cutie mark. Ha! How wonderful? Every foal would love to get that for a cutie mark.
"Hello there, what can I get for you?"
"Shot of Jameson whiskey please", said Bon-Bon quickly and with confidence.
"Yup." The bartender poured Bon-Bon the shot.
She gingerly drank it.. yuck.. but it would be all worth it.
"Too strong for ya", asked the bartender.
"Nope. In fact, I want another shot right now."
"Sure thing."
Bon-Bon took a second shot, then a third, then a fourth, then a fifth.
Bon-Bon felt happy. Everything suddenly made sense. The world was all about smiles and laughter. She also had a real sexy bartender pouring her the shots. He had a swag to him. He was way cooler than Lyra.
"Ohhhh.... I can't believe I'm talkkkkkking to the sexiest pony aliiiiiiive", said Bon-Bon while laughing hysterically.
"I think you had enough", said the bartender.
"Yer just saying that cuz you knoooooooooow that Iiiiiiiii can totally beat your ass in a drinking game."
"I bet you can."
Bon-Bon felt like dancing.
"Wooooooooooohhhhhhh, heyyyyyy Mistah Sexy, you wanna dance with sexy me?"
"I am sorry but I have to tend the bar."
"Well well well, that sounds like a better excuse than whatever that bitch Lyra would have said."
"Lyra who?"
"She's a no-pony", said Bon-Bon, "I don't expect someone like you to waste his time knowing such trash.. c'mon let's goooo dancing."
The world was spinning. Holy shit, the world was spinning. Bon-Bon started laughing.
"You know, I'm an irony. I was like the smartest pony in all of Ponyville and like the sexiest mare alive.. but that Lyra Heartstrings, she don't want me cuz I'm too good for her sorry little ass.. it all makes sense now, it definitely does."
"I'm sorry for giving you too much.. I misjudged how much you could.. uh.. handle."
"That's a lie, sexy. It's okay. You can admit it. You totally want me to sleep with you. I might just do it if you give me another drink."
"Err..."
Bon-Bon just wanted to dance. Fuck that guy for being a party pooper.
"Woo hoo!!! Talk to ya later!!"
Bon-Bon ran to the dance floor. She could hear "Living on a Prayer". Oh my gosh. She loved that song. Bon-Bon began to sing at the top of her lungs.
"We've got to hold on to what we've got
'Cause it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not
We've got each other and that's a lot for love
We'll give it a shot
We're half way there
Livin' on a prayer
Take my hoof and we'll make it, I swear
Livin' on a prayer
We've got to hold on ready or not
You live for the fight when it's all that you've got"
She could see Flitter, a gorgeous pegasus and way cooler than Lyra.
"Hey, it's Bon-Bon!! You remembered our favorite song."
"Of course I did, cutie, cuz I'm Bon-Bon!"
"You sure are."
Bon-Bon and Flitter began to grind against one another.
"So funny seeing you on a Thursday night, Bonnie."
"I gots Friday off!! WOOOOOOO!!!!"
"Me too, sis! Where's dat human bitch?" Damn, Flitter was totally drunk. Bon-Bon had to bring that to her attention.
"Hey Flitts, you're soooo drunk right now. I can tell."
"Wow yea. I guess I am, hahahahahahahahaha. Is that why you look so sexy to me RIGHT NOW?!?!?"
"Maybe. I know that's why you are super sexy yourself."
"Better than Lyra?"
"Oh, much better. Lyraaa's a total fucking square. She would be like waaaahhhhhh the bar is too loud, ponies are too drunk waaaaaahhhh waaaaaahhhhh, take me outside so I can sit on a fucking chair like a bipedal creature... waaaaaahhhhh."
"Oh my gosh. Bon-Bon, you crack me up."
"How about I crack open those lips of yours?"
"Which kind?"
"The ones on your face are fine for now."
Bon-Bon and Flitter began to kiss. It was fast-paced and aggressive. Bon-Bon pushed Flitter to the ground and the two began rolling on the floor giggling loudly. Bon-Bon could feel dancing ponies stepping on her but she didn't give a fuck. This was the best night ever.
Suddenly everything became a blur.
Bon-Bon's head hurt. She could see that she was in bed. There was Pinkie Pie humming the "Smile" song. Bon-Bon smelled herself. Ugh, she smelled like vomit. Too much booze last night.
"Good morning, Bon-Bon, I am so glad that you're awake", said Pinkie softly.
Owww... damn.. Bon-Bon had the worst hangover she ever had in her life.
"What happened?"
"You were crying outside the bar and throwing up all over the place. There was Flitter, who looked like she wanted to rape you but I took you home with me."
"Is Flitter okay?"
"I think so. She was inebriated too but not as bad as you. I feel so bad for you."
"Don't. Let Lyra and Twilight be happy together, I'm obviously not good enough."
"I've heard, but I think Lyra is more likely to end up with you in the long run than Twilight."
"What are you talking about? Lyra asked Twilight out on a date, not me."
Pinkie giggled and gave Bon-Bon a glass of water.
After all of that booze, the water did feel quite nice.
Pinkie basically saved Bon-Bon's life last night.
"I got a plan. If it works, I know it will make you smile", said Pinkie with a big grin.