I was traveling down a dirt road that led to a small village known as Ponyville. I wasn't exactly sure what I was expecting to find there, but anywhere was better than the hive. As I was walking down the road a thought occurred to me. "Why not pave the roads, it would make waking easier and would encourage tourist."
Then a more useful thought occurred to me. " I wonder if this village is pissed about the whole wedding thing." This would be a problem because I happen to be one of the most hated creatures in equestria, a changeling. Ever since that bitch Chrysalis failed at impersonating a princess, my kind have been on a fucking hit list. Speaking of which....
"Fuck!" I yell as something blurry and rainbow colored rams into my chest. I open my eyes to see a young woman, probably around my age sitting on top of me with a murderous gleam in her eye. But all I thought at the moment was that she was very attractive. Then I was punched in the face. Less attractive.
"Fuck, lady I don't even know you and you're already beating the hell out of me? People know me for at least a minute before they try." I continued to ramble while she looked at me as if I was senile. Which to be fair-
"Oh don't act like you're innocent, we all still remember what you guys did at Cadence's wedding." The rainbow haired girl spat at me.
"Uh... Yeah that did happen didn't it? Would I stop being straddled and beaten if I tell you I had no part in that?" At my words she blushed and realized what a compromising position she had us in. "Not that I would mind if this where in a different circumstance."
"Shu- shut up."
"You know, because you're really pretty and all." She blushed even harder and hit me again. "And we are back to the striking!"
"Alright bug," ouch, " tell me why your travelling to ponyville and why I shouldn't crush you."
"Well to answer your first question, I'm traveling to ponyville to try and gain citizenship. I broke away from the hive because I realized that was supressing us with her whole ' hive-mind mentality '. And to answer your second question when I became self aware, I became stronger that Chrysalis." At those words the rainbow haired lass found herself surrounded by magic. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to have a chat with a miss Twilight Sparkle." I started to walk away but then I remembered something. "By the way what was your name?"
The rainbow haired girl scowled at me through bubble I put her in. "I'm Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in equestria."
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. Shit. I just assaulted an element of harmony. I'm going to be an enemy of the fucking country. Well I guess I'm already one by just being a changeling. I swear if I see that Chrysalis bitch again.... whatever. I decide to take to the air and fly the rest of the way. Which was.... uh.... fuck. I try to remember what I learned about the magic user. She was powerful, she had a dragon assistant, and she was anti-social. With that knowledge in mind I headed for a small cottage near the everfree forest. That would be the perfect place for her to stay. It was secluded so she could research and perform potentially dangerous spells and would be perfect for the dragon. I landed at the front door and knocked three times. I swear I heared what sounded like an *eep* a small shuffling noise and then the door open a crack to reveal a a sea blue eye and pink hair.
"Hello I'm looking for Twilight Sparkle. Would you happen to be her?"
I'm not sure if it was what I said or maybe it's because I was a changeling, but she screamed. Loud.
"Ow, there is no need to shout I just need to knows if you're her if not I can just -"
The last word wouldn't be said as I felt my body go rigid. I don't know did it, but I was caught in a telekinesis field.
"Fluttershy, darling are you ok? I saw this brute at your door and heared you screaming. Please tell me everything is all right." I saw the voice and the magic user as she stepped to this Fluttershy's door. I don't know why but I keep getting pinned by beautiful women today, and she was stunning. Her styled purple hair, her flawless skin, and perfect dress spoke about her. She was classy. I hated dealing with classy.
"N-no Rarity I'm fine. It's just I was scared to see a changeling at my door. I saw him and I ... I Just," the she started tearing up. Damn, I don't think I've ever felt more like a monster. But when that adorable girl stepped into view I nearly apologized. Nearly.
"I'm probably in trouble aren't I?" Sometimes I hated my mouth. *Slap* . "Ow, that was unnecessary. All I need to do is talk to Twilight Sparkle, and seeing as you two are Rarity and Fluttershy..." The words did on my lips. Two more of the elements of harmony. I am one unlucky mother fucker.
"You, brute, are going to explain to me why you are terrifying my friend and then I will consider not letting Applejack beat you senseless. "
I was about to point out how I already said I was looking for Twilight Sparkle, but then I heared in a thick southern drawl,"I don't think I'm gonna let cha' Rares."
I crane my neck as much as possible to see Rainbow Dash and another girl who I assume is Applejack. This is just what I need more elements of harmony. So I did the only thing I could do in this situation. "Hello Rainbow Dash, you're looking just as beautiful as you were ten minutes ago. "
Rainbow Dash blushed heavily and Applejack looked like she was going to explode from trying not to laugh. I caught a knee to the gut, but it was well worth it. "And I'm assuming your Applejack, a lovely southern belle if I have ever seen one." This made her face light up and she tried to hide it behind her Stetson. This time I was kicked in the chest, and it was definitely not worth it. It's like that woman kicked trees for a living.
"Can we jus' get back to you explainen' what it is you're doin' here?"
As I explained my situation again, I couldn't help but feel Applejack weighing each word I said, and when I mentioned I was stronger then Chrysalis, she froze.
"Girls, he ain't lyin'." Applejack said quietly.
"Oh Applejack that's ridiculous. I've been holding him this whole time and he has yet to break free." Rarity stated factually.
I rolled my eyes and landed on the ground. Rarity stared at me dumbfounded. "As miss Applejack explained," I took the form of an ursa major for a second then transformed back, "I am the strongest of my kind, and you are all pissing me off."