Pinkie speedily made her way to Twilight's Treebrary with Fluttershy close behind. She had only grown more and more put off by her unknown challenger. Everywhere she looked, she saw ponies that she would normally love to hang out with. But today, they all held their own shiny little trinkets, swapping stories about the fantastic mare that was oh-so generous and helpful. It made Pinkie furious. So blindingly angry she never saw Twilight's front door before smacking into it.
"Oh! are you alright?" Fluttershy asked, concerned. Pinkie leapt up.
"Of course I am! Do you know why?! Because we've got that mare now!" she exclaimed before kicking the door in.
There was no immediate response to the two ponies' intrusion. But it wasn't long before they heard the familiar pitter-patter of Spike's feet as he came to investigate the noise. As his head came into view, Fluttershy couldn't suppress a scream.
The young dragon's face seemed to be trapped in some kind of metal contraption. It resembled some sort of bear trap, except it was already shut, and looped all the all the way around his head, with clamps in place that pushed his mouth forcibly closed. There was a padlock to the side of the device. Oddly, it had no space for a key.
"Spike! Who did this!? Get that thing off!" Fluttershy panicked. She dove for him, scrambling her hooves everywhere looking for a way to detach the mask. Spike tried to push her back, but she relentlessly tried to tug off his ghastly accessory. He ran from her, going back up the stairs. Fluttershy and Pinkie followed him.
Spike dove into Twilight's kitchen. Upon going in themselves, they could see a chest, filled to the brim with shining gems. There were amethysts, tiger-eyes, emeralds, even a few fire rubies here and there. Spike sprang from the box, with a handful of the booty, tossing it into a nearby mixing bowl. Throwing his claws up, he waited for the two to comprehend. They simply stared, confused.
Slumping a bit, Spike picked up a blank piece of parchment and quill, and started scribbling something down. Pinkie noted the quill was gold in color, causing a twinge of anger in her. Once finished with the note, the dragon handed it to them. Fluttershy quickly scanned the contents.
"Ohhh, I see. Sorry, Spike."
Spike merely shrugged in response. Pinkie snatched the paper from Fluttershy to read it herself.
Guys, stop! I'm alright.
Some mare came by earlier and gave me a chest full of gems. She said it was for the gem cake I tried to make one time.
I was gonna thank her, but she put this thing on me. She said it would come off when the cake was done.
And she gave me this cool quill.PS.Only 3 layers left!
Pinkie crumpled up the note and tossed it.
"So, this thing is supposed to stop you from eating the gems?" Fluttershy asked.
Spike nodded, taking a single gem from the chest and tapping it against where mouth would be, showing his inability to have gluttony have its way like last time.
"Great, just great!" Pinkie said, exasperated.
"First she steals my job, now she's wiring little dragons' mouths shut and forcing them to bake cakes!"
"That was kinda rude of her not to ask first." Fluttershy admitted.
"Exactly! She's gotta be stopped! Where did she go, Spike?"
Spike procured another sheet of paper and quickly doodled two shapes. He showed it to them, revealing some kind of fruit and a strangely star-shaped object. Pinkie understood completely, grabbing Fluttershy by the tail and running back through the door, leaving Spike to his baking.
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A small rabbit hopped up to the fence, its little nose twitching. The structure looked different today, shinier than usual, but no matter. He would climb through the holes anyway, and there were no big, mean earthies around to stop-
Bzzzzzrrrrrt!
After feeling the burning sensation of thousands of tiny strikes on his body, the rabbit was thrown back quite a distance from the booby-trapped fence. Were he a tad more conscious, he would have heard the heard the guffawing of a certain apple farming earthie.
"Oho, I tell you, Big Mac. It's gonna be awhile before that gets old."
"Eeyuup."
"Oh wait, look, he goin' for it again!"
The rabbit had indeed recovered, and began to make for the fence on wobbly haunches. It grabbed hold of one of the fence's posts. From a hidden panel, a metallic claw slid out and snatched the animal by the ears. As it struggled, a second compartment opened, this one revealing a boxing gloved appendage. The claw held the scared rabbit aloft as the glove wound itself up. Just as the first arm tossed the rabbit upwards, the second launched at the animal with a vicious uppercut. The force of the blow sent him sailing down the road leading to Sweet Apple Acres.
Applejack let loose another howl of laughter.
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Fluttershy was struggling to keep up with Pinkie at this point. She had kept up with Pinkie's burning rage at this pony that kept one-upping her, but her steam was running out. Had she not been startled by something abnormally fuzzy landing in a tree, she would have given up and gone home right then.
"Oh my! Who did this to you?! You poor thing!" she said, cradling the nigh comatose bunny, with a lightly singed pelt and a black eye. She felt another hard tug on her tail.
"C'mon, Fluttershy! We don't have time for burnt bunnies! The fun-stealing fiend might strike again!" she urged, quickly setting off again. The pegasus followed reluctantly, still holding the injured innocent. Once they made it to the opening gates of the orchard, Pinkie took a deep breath and screamed.
"APPLEJAAAACK!" her voice rang shrilly, scaring several birds and even scattering a few fruit bats. As the echo died down, the mare in question ran out over her fields, skidding to a stop.
"Hi Pinkie, Fluttershy. What got you so riled up?"
"Do you have any gold on you?!"
"Sugarcube, I don't know what-"
"DO YOU!?" she screamed, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her.
"Okay! Yes ah do!" she responded, leaping back.
The farmer took off her hat, and retrieved from it a golden apple. Pinkie was less than pleased.
"Uggggh! So, what did that pony give you, Aj?"
Applejack straightened herself up.
"Well, if you're so desperate to know, Pinkie, she installed a nice new fence around the orchard. Comes with its own defenses! Normally, I wouldn't cotton to all its bells and whistles, but..." she took one apple from a nearby bin and chucked it at the fence. Quite suddenly, a mechanical arm holding a wooden bat swung at the fruit, sending it back into Applejack's outstretched hoof.
"Didn't have the heart to tell her I didn't want it." she smiled, taking an idle bite of her slightly bruised fruit.
"I-Is that what happened to this poor bunny!?" she asked, shoving the still fatigued creature in Applejack's face. Her eyes went wide, and she began to look uneasy.
"Oh! Well, its pretty diligent to its job, Fluttershy. Y-You know how it is, right?" Fluttershy set her friend down gently then turned on Applejack. There was a dead seriousness in her usually gentle eyes. Honestly, it terrified the earth pony.
"Applejack..." she said slowly, moving ever closer to her, "you'd better take down that fence, or so help me!-"
"What else did she do here, Aj? Did she walk your dog, do your laundry? Buck your apples for you!?" Pinkie interrupted.
Grateful for a reason to tear away from the pegasus's disapproving glare, Applejack answered.
"No, no, she just put in that there fence, gave us these gold things and left. She seemed real desperate to help, now that I recall. Oh, and she said she "fixed" Grannie's walker. Got no idea what she meant by that."
"Oh, that youngin' fixed it alright." went a new voice.
The three ponies turned to find the matriarch of the apple clan had hobbled out to greet them.
"That crazy little pony was all hopped up to help out 'round here. You two tell 'er she's a right honorable filly to be doin' so much good."
"Yeah, we'll let her know." Pinkie said through gritted teeth.
"So, we heard this "honorable filly" fixed your walker. Did she do a good job?"
"Oh, did she ever!" Granny smiled, and put a hoof to her mouth, whistling loudly.
A moment was allowed to pass before heavy footfalls were heard. The small party looked in their direction to see quite a sight. A pair of clawed legs came stomping towards them, eerily resembling a rooster's. They held aloft a kind of platform, made of metal. It moved all on its own; there seemed to be no eyes or even a head. It stopped lumbering in front of them, and brought one of its feet up to the stage it carried, in a kind of salute, only stopping when Granny Smith shouted "At ease!". No one present could fathom why; the creature lacked any method of hearing.
The three younger ponies stared at the "walker", mouths agape.
"Ah don't plan on usin' it much. Still got some kick in these old gams."
They continued to stare.
"Did you youngins want to take it for a spin?"
Granny was sure Pinkie nodded.
"Alright. These girls'll be takin' ya fer the day, stretch!" she called up to the platform.
The walker saluted once more before grabbing Pinkie in one talon and hoisted her up to it's top. Fluttershy followed with her own flight. The beast trotted off with it's cargo. Applejack was still in some shock, even when they had gone over the horizon.
She only became responsive again when she could see a firework tearing through the air. It gave a loud pop as reached the top of its trajectory. A black mass could be seen tumbling through the air. It landed in a hay bale with a thud, and stumbled out coughing. It was a soot-covered hedgehog. Applejack took a look towards the fence quick enough to see an arm holding a lighter before it slid back inside its slot. She chuckled.
"Silly varmints."